AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Welcome to VodkaPundit. It is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 11:00:34 AM ----- BODY: Welcome to VodkaPundit. It is the VodkaPundit's view that the best commentary comes after a lovely adult beverage or three. Just enough, in my grandfather's wise words to, "loosen the lips and sharpen the wits." Thus, you'll find most new postings after 5pm. The VodkaPundit is squirreled away in his Rocky Mountain hideaway, imbibing the news in safety and secrecy. Just so you know, he'll be attacking things from the Decadence Caucus of the Heinlein Wing of the small-L libertarian perspective. And a special thanks to Home Depot, without whom the new office dry bar would still be just a dream. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Aren't We Bombing Iraq PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 11:51:34 AM ----- BODY: Why Aren't We Bombing Iraq Back To The Stone Age Already (Or As They Call It, "Last Thursday")? Around the same time we were starting to show effects against the Taliban last fall, the Administration floated trial balloons about making the Saddam Hussein regime our Next Target in the War on Terror. And I think everybody but a few muddle-headed do-gooders and some State Department Pukes (assignment to class: find an important difference between those two, and having the Marine Corps on call does not count) thought nuking Baghdad (not literally) was a pretty damn fine idea. So why haven't we been sending armoured and mechanized batallions to Kuwait already? Why aren't the other two-thirds of 10th Mountain Division being moved to Turkey? I mean, it's a pretty simple squeeze play: Mountain soldiers and Special forces (along with Turks and Kurds) moving in from the north, and big armoured columns scything through from the south. So where are the troop ships, the convoys of cargo planes? Troop movements this big can't be hidden -- and that's a good thing. It tells the Bad Guy, "Your days are numbered, start packing for Sudan -- we'll bomb there next." It puts the fear of God or Allah or Shiva or Whomever into them. And that's healthy for our foreign policy, puts some backbone into our "allies," and further tames the Arab "street." So I ask again -- why the hell aren't we building up over there? Simple. We're gonna let Iran do it. Oh, don't worry. We're not about to let those hostage-taking Ayatollahs invade Iraq or anything like that. But let's be clear: We know for a fact that the "Persian street" is ripe for rising up against their theocratic government. The population is overwhelmingly young, with little if any memory of the Shah, They want freedom. They want to wear decent women's fasions. They want to make out in the park. They want their MTV. And we want them to get what they want. A push here, a shove there, some small arms discretely made available through air drops and overland from our New Friends the Turkomen, and... voila! A democratic Iran. Is it really that easy? No, of course not. Neither was Afghanistan. But it is doable. And before the dictator's blood can be washed off the streets of Tehran, the people of Baghdad will ask themselves two questions: One, why can't we do that?; and two, will the American's help us, too? And we need to reply: Of course you can have that and of course we will. The time to start sending troops to Kuwait and Turkey is the same time we start giving a little hope to the good people of Iran. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: OK, our template editing has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 01:22:52 PM ----- BODY: OK, our template editing has not gone to plan. So disastrous, in fact, that we'll be skipping this evening's vodka & tonic (VnT) and heading straight for the scotch. Update: Looking a little better now. Got rid of all those weird numbers. Learn from my mistake -- never tackle a new web project without the kind of cocktail James Bond prefered. That's "large and very strong and very well made." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This excerpted from an excerpt PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 03:24:19 PM ----- BODY: This excerpted from an excerpt from today's Opinion Journal Best of the Web: "Warlords from Somalia and terrorists linked to the al Qaeda network have been spotted moving from the failed African state to nearby nations," reports the Washington Times' Bill Gertz. "A group of Somalian Muslim guerrillas was spotted recently as they fled to Yemen, U.S. officials told The Washington Times," suggesting that they plan to use Yemen "as a staging area for guerrilla attacks if U.S. forces start military operations against al Qaeda terrorists in Somalia." In other words, just the mere thought that we might be coming is terror enough for the terrorists. InstaPundit is right again -- victory is the best propaganda. For a bigger-picture look at how we can use a bigger-muscle version of this strategy against Iran and Iraq, see below. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If Victor Davis Hanson isn't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 04:25:00 PM ----- BODY: If Victor Davis Hanson isn't careful, he'll find himself with a government job -- as Italy's new Minister for Saying What Needs to be Said. In this great piece, he sounds like Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, only without the timidity. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Enron implosion is starting PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 04:40:52 PM ----- BODY: The Enron implosion is starting to look really bad for the Bush Administration, according to the latest from MSNBC, the Las Vegas Sun, and...hell, everybody. As more details come out, we'll see the Democrats are just as much to blame as the Republicans -- but the Dems will come out ahead on points. You read that here first, kids. The question remains, will this scandal be another Iran-Contra, or just another Whitewater? I'm betting one vodka martini on the latter, but with a lot less certainty than on the first prediction. This much is certain: It's gonna get messy. UPDATE: Team Bush just can't score a P.R. win. This story in the New York Times sums up what I saw in Bush's press conference earlier on Fox News -- namely, that the Bush Administration just plain doesn't look good. Bush proposed some new pension plan protection policies (all hail alliteration!), but as the NYT story says, "that move appeared aimed in part at containing the political damage from Enron's demise." Bush needs to learn what cost his father the presidency. When it comes to the economy, you must at least appear to be pro-active. Simply reacting to a scandal such as this makes his administration look neglectful at best and corrupt at worst. But I still say the scandal will hurt both sides(Reps more than Dems), and play out more like Whitewater than Iran-Contra. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This just in: According to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 05:53:48 PM ----- BODY: This just in: According to a new report on Forbes.com, the soon-to-be-released rap CD from Stephen Ambrose has at least two rhythm tracks lifted directly from Cornel West's new album, Songs In The Key of Afro-Centricity. Stay posted for details. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Times (of London) reports PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 10:59:16 PM ----- BODY: The Times (of London) reports that US companies need to write off one trillion in dotcom losses. Folks, that's a trillion dollars. No typo, trillion with a capital T and that rhymes with P and that stands for Piss-Poor Stock Market Tech Returns for the Foreseeable Future. Says The Times, "Although the write-offs are book-keeping exercises that do not involve any cash, they will prove to be embarrassing for many chief executives." It should also prove embarrassing to the And The Band Marched On supporters of the former Clinton Administration. This tech bubble started under Clinton's watch, and it was Clinton's man Joel Klein at the Justice Department who brought it all down with his silly, unproductive, immoral suit against Microsoft. I don't mean to harp against Clinton, but this is the spin the Republicans need to take if they are to survive this year's midterm elections. And lest you think VodkaPundit is a dyed-in-the-red-white-and-blue-wool right winger, wait until Bush messes up. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Here It Comes In an PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 11:09:18 PM ----- BODY: Here It Comes In an unsigned editorial in the Thursday edition, the New York Times writes, "So far, the White House is taking the right steps. We trust its determination will not flag in the months ahead, even if embarrassing questions come up about Enron's ties to the administration." The NYT does so for one reason only: Later, when they attack the Administration over some perceived snag in the investigation, they can claim, "Look, we were being reasonable, but the whole thing reeks to high heaven and the stink starts in the Oval Office." Once again, you read it here first. VodkaPundit will continue to make not-so-bold predictions, right up until the bar closes. Later, we'll take a look back at just how cloudy -- or clear -- my crystal ball turns out to be. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More inveracity from Paul Krugman, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 11:25:58 PM ----- BODY: More inveracity from Paul Krugman, not that anyone right of Lenin is surprised. Today Comrade K writes about budget shortfalls in state capitals across our great land. "In the 1990's most states had Republican governors; and they applied the same strategy — using what-me-worry forecasts and bogus accounting to justify tax cuts for the affluent — that the Bush administration applied at a national level in 2001. In both cases the consequences were predictable. " When Krugman says "affluent," get a good grip on your wallet if you and your spouse combined make more than 50k a year. Rosy forecasts? Like the ones coming out of the previous administration that the business cycle had at long last been repealed by the magic of Clintonomics? Or the forecasts of prior Clinton budgets, with deficits as far as the eye can see? From VodkaPundit's perch, the statehouses did OK. Krugman explains that the states are suffering near-record shortfalls because, "The biggest proximate cause of the budget crunch is the end of the great 1990's boom; second place goes to surging medical costs. Expenses for homeland security add a final insult." Let's look at those one by one. The '90s boom did indeed end -- thanks in part to jacked up oil prices in 2000, which is thanks in toto to the prior Administration's total lack of an energy policy or a coherent foreign policy. Medical costs? He wants to blame our bloated worst-of-both-worlds semi-free/semi-welfare state medical economy on Republican governors? Paul, you might as well blame VodkaPundit for starting World War I. And Homeland Security expenses. OK, fair enough. But it seems the only people worrying about terrorism were Ralph Peters, Tom Friedman, and other assorted misfits of the right and left. Again, how are Republican governors to blame? He continues on in a similar vein -- although Krugman is man enough to admit that "spending by state and local governments was about the same share of G.D.P. at the end of the 1990's as it was at the beginning." Did he ever consider that the only thing keeping some states anything close to solvent is that they haven't raised taxes in a recession? He also mentions a "rainy day fund." But we all know what government lockboxes are like -- like leaving Ron Jeremy in charge of your little sister. Paul Krugman used to be an interesting, fair-minded, new-thinking economist. And now he just works for The New York Times. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Something better from the NYT. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/10/2002 11:31:13 PM ----- BODY: Something better from the NYT. Nicholas D. Kristof makes some fine points today regarding North Korea. You might not agree -- and I don't -- that those kooky kids north of the DMZ are more dangerous than Saddam, and few might agree with his prescription, but he still makes some fine points about the Dear Leader's regime. Good reading. UPDATE: Cocktail-induced mental connection -- is it mere coincidence that DMZ and DMV sound so much alike? Think I'm kidding? Long lines, senseless forms, unpleasant service, and (at least in Colorado) the ability to take away your license for little or no cause. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call -- final words PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/11/2002 12:17:50 AM ----- BODY: Last Call -- final words for the night Regarding that "sexy" promo for Paula Zahn's hot new show on CNN, Andrew Sullivan wrote, "a cute face and decent boobs are a huge advantage in capturing and keeping your audience." Andrew, from where I sit, Paula seems to have phenomenal boobs. And I'm pretty sure she has a face up there somewhere in the head region. Look, we all know she wasn't that great on Fox, and we all know she won't be that great on CNN, and we all know that some of us will continue to watch her anyway. I mean, there's a chance that as she re-crosses her legs in that short skirt that maybe she forgot her panties and... ...and now you all know why I'm going to call this (hopefully) daily feature "Last Call." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tina Brown's Talk magazine is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/11/2002 10:17:22 AM ----- BODY: Tina Brown's Talk magazine is 55 million bucks in the hole. That's 19 millions dollars better than Salon.com, and with Talk, at least you got something to line the bird cage with. So which will survive? My guess is Salon will -- and you read it here first. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It looks like South Dakota PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/11/2002 10:22:56 AM ----- BODY: It looks like South Dakota might finally have figured out a way to rid itself of Tom Daschle, but only if he gets too big for his britches and runs for president. Daschle might be able to beat Bush -- if this recession lasts two more years, if the war takes a sudden turn for the worse, and/or if Bush just seems, well, like too much like his dad. But that's an awful lot of hoping to risk his position as Senate Majority Leader. And odds are, he'll keep that job come November. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It looks like Blogger is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/11/2002 12:15:33 PM ----- BODY: It looks like Blogger is finally back up and running. We'll see if it lasts. Meantime, my Best Man is having his 40th birthday party tomorrow night -- but the real party starts this afternoon and will end sometime Sunday morning. I just have to rig a black armband before I head up to Denver. More great news & comment on Monday. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Good Monday morning. VodkaPundit has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 12:17:28 PM ----- BODY: Good Monday morning. VodkaPundit has a mostly cleared head now after the weekend's celebrations. Matt Drudge links to this story in the UK's Independent this morning. Apparently, the US faces a record four billion in WTO "penalties," I.E., higher import duties into the EU, over some of our tax code. If this ruling goes into affect, it could A) decrease Congress' appetite for doling out corporate welfare through the tax code, which would be a good thing; B) increase American suspicion of free trade, which would be a bad thing; or C) not really have much effect at all on anything. VodkaPundit chooses C -- and you read it here first. Free trade is good for business, good for the economy, good for everybody. And warping the tax code for big political donors -- or anyone else -- always always always leads to warped economic behavior. If four billion bucks is what it costs us to get straightened out on that score, then that's a small price to pay for yet another competitive advantage over the rest of the world. Especially over France. Ed. Note: VodkaPundit has been a Proud Member in Good Standing of the Bomb France First Crowd since 1986. Although sometimes when enjoying a nice Bourdeaux, he'd settle for simply defoliating Belgium. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Andrew Sullivan makes some rather PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 12:23:25 PM ----- BODY: Andrew Sullivan makes some rather clearheaded comments, as always, over the White House and the brewing-but-not-yet-quite-bubbling Enron scandal. Don't think he's swung my opinion (available below, last Thursday), but he does seem more hopeful than I. Then again, Andrew probably doesn't enjoy nearly as many vodka martinis. UPDATE: The more I look at the news today, the more it appears that everyone thinks the Dems are going to back off Enron for fear of looking worse than the Reps. Folks, that just ain't the way it works with business scandals. When Dems take money from Big Business, it's so they can better look after the little guy. That doesn't make sense, you say? It doesn't have to. It still usually works. When Reps take money from Big Business, it's because they're all Masons or some such secret cabal and out to take over the world. So VodkaPundit stands by his previous predictions (as opposed to "prior conviction") that this will hurt the Reps more than the Dems, but will play out pretty small. Whitewater at the biggest. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: My secret crush, Virginia Postrel, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 12:31:26 PM ----- BODY: My secret crush, Virginia Postrel, has some bitingly funny comments on Cyrus Vance, the New York Times, and obituaries -- if that last word isn't made redundant by the two names. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Quickly now, because it's old PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 12:34:00 PM ----- BODY: Quickly now, because it's old news: VodkaPundit forgot Friday to link to this brilliant, bitter Krauthammer piece. If you didn't read it Friday, read it today. And if you did, read it again. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Thomas Sowell, ya gotta love PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 01:02:50 PM ----- BODY: Thomas Sowell, ya gotta love him, has a great rant on the self-supposed moral superiority of the Blame America First/Root Cause of Hate crowd. Delovely and delcicious. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More -- I'll put this PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 01:49:28 PM ----- BODY: More -- I'll put this delicately -- goddamn stupid idiocy against cloning on National Review Online. Wesley J Smith, speaking ex cathedra, I guess, has lots of not-so-new, not-so-well-thought-out, little "arguments." He starts: "Cloning apologists remind me of that philandering husband. Their opponents point out that a cloned human embryo is a human life, and the cloners reply with: 'Human life? What human life?'" Let's go back to the birds and bees, Wesley. Human life happens when a boy and a girl (who love each other very much and within the legal strictures of heterosexual marriage) get all hot'n'sweaty and do the nasty. Conception occurs, genes are joined, and 40 weeks later, a little baby is born. Or maybe Jesus does it all. I dunno -- I'm still not married. In any case, something that happens in a lab is certainly not human life as it has evolved (oops! I let that cat out of the bag!) over the last few million years. No, Wes, what happens in a lab is called an "experiment." Science, dig it, cool. More: "Hoping to make vast fortunes from patented "products" derived from the destruction of embryonic life, Big Biotech is counting on being able to create an unlimited supply of human clones." Unlimited human clones? Someone is going to make money peddling baby Hitlers to the mass market? Let's check just two facts here, Wesley, since your editor didn't see fit to do so. First, some of the most promising research going on in cloning is how do so without destroying any embryonic material. Hell, even those heartless, Stalin-cloning (or was it Hitler?) scientists have real ethical issues there. I don't, but I'm just a cruel drunk. Second, there is almost NO MARKET AT ALL for cloning whole humans. Really, I'm messed up enough -- do I really want an exact copy of me someday, should my fiance and I prove to be infertile? When a couple decide to make a baby, it's because they want BOTH OF THEM joined in a new person. It's the ultimate expression of very traditional love. Very old school, very conservative, Wes -- you should approve. So I ask -- who wants a carbon copy? And even if they did, what the hell business is it of Wesley J. Smith? Human cloning is going to provide things like gene treatments for major diseases, replacement parts for VodkaPundit's abused liver, and healthy normal babies for Bob and Alice for whom in vitro fertilization just wasn't working. We'll live longer, and happier, and maybe, just maybe, manage to have healthier children. I could go on and dissect the rest of the paragraphs in Wes's baby, but that seems a little like a late-term abortion. VodkaPundit gets mad sometimes. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just finished my weekly browsing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 02:23:12 PM ----- BODY: Just finished my weekly browsing of Salon.com's front page. Except for sometimes checking out their non-sex sex column to see if Glenn Reynolds is being too harsh (he isn't), VodkaPundit has found nothing to read there since Camile Paglia's column stopped appearing. What has happened to Camille? Was she fired? Did she quit? Sabbatical? Where is she writing now? Camille, we miss you and we're OK with you being not being interested in us because just we're a man -- so long as you keep writing us fresh columns. Come back. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: In the space of just PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 02:39:51 PM ----- BODY: In the space of just a few blogging hours today, I've admitted to crushes on both Camille Paglia and Virginia Postrel. Leaving aside the political and (for Camille) biological near-impossibility of such a threesome, I remain in good hopes that my fiance is far too sensible to ever read this blog. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Delaware Senator Joe Biden, previously PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 03:09:41 PM ----- BODY: Delaware Senator Joe Biden, previously known for stealing entire childhood episodes from British Labour politicians, makes a decent case for using US troops as peacekeepers in Afghanistan. Frankly, other than the Brits and maybe the Canadians, I don't trust anyone else with the job. But there's one little issue that keeps me from agreeing with the good senator. We're stretched too damn thin. This is a long war and when we get to dealing with Iraq it's going to be a much bigger war. The bad news is, we don't have the Army that deployed to Saudi in 1990-91. VII Corps was disbanded almost immediately after, V Corps is spread out all over southern and central Europe...hell, even our armored cav regiments have been stripped of most of their armor. The good news is, it won't take seven, eight, or nine US heavy divisions to topple Saddam. But the occupation WILL take a lot of foot soldiers. US foot soldiers. No one else can do that job. The Germans have a bad history there, the French would spend all their time simultaneously on their knees and trying to pickpocket, the Brits just don't have the manpower, don't even mention the Russians, and the Canadian military just makes people giggle. Even the Canadians. (Mark Steyn excepted -- he's mad as hell and not gonna take it any more.) So, we can't be sending our warmakers to Afghanistan to act as peacekeepers. Sorry, Joe. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Washington Post's Michael Kelly PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 04:05:37 PM ----- BODY: The Washington Post's Michael Kelly admits that "smuggled arms on a rogue ship bound for Gaza cast doubt on Arafat’s integrity." No shit, Mike? UPDATE: What is it with MSNBC, anyway? Except for when they webpublish George Will's bi-weekly Newsweek column, their op-ed page leans further left than Dan Rather dodging accusations of bias. Attention, Bill Gates -- it's 10pm; do you know where your money is going? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call -- final words PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/14/2002 10:45:44 PM ----- BODY: Last Call -- final words for the night VodkaPundit would like to apologize for today's public innuendo regarding Virginia Postrel and Camille Paglia, as well as some rather unsavory-yet-delicious thoughts involving Lady Margeret Thatcher that he kept damn well to himself. It's just that my fiance left town for a week on business, and then compounded the, uh, loneliness by catching a nasty cold while in L.A. Sorry, honey. Get well soon. Meantime, if Camille, and/or Virginia, and/or Lady M happen to read this, just email me -- we can set something up. I'm down to the olive, so good night. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Larry King is in trouble PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 10:39:59 AM ----- BODY: Larry King is in trouble with his CNN colleagues for supposedly claiming his new contract offer is much bigger than it really is. VodkaPundit is going to try to care, but not very hard. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Over at the New York PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 10:52:28 AM ----- BODY: Over at the New York Times, Nicolas D. Kristof ruins a perfectly fine cup of strong Italian coffee with this lede: "One of the things that we Americans are finally waking up to since Sept. 11 is the degree to which we are disliked and resented around the world." Methinks Nicolas uses the word "we" a bit lightly. After all, murderous blood-thirsty savages like us bloggers don't care what the world thinks, we just want to nuke it all -- right? And when he speaks of himself, that "we" has always known how much the world hates the US -- almost as much as Kristof does. VodkaPundit believes the other side of the equation is far more important. Three of the things the Sept 11 follow-up taught the world is how much power the US has, how willing we are to use it, and how utterly useless our professional commentariat is. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also at the NYT, Paul PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 10:56:20 AM ----- BODY: Also at the NYT, Paul Krugman is at it again. I'm not even going to bother with him today. Maybe not again ever. It's boring and depressing and not even VodkaPundit wants a drink this early. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Thomas Bray has a nice, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 11:09:48 AM ----- BODY: Thomas Bray has a nice, if short, piece asking, "Will Europe's new money last?" He and I and maybe even you already know the answer is "probably not," although Bray goes after what I call the soft, cultural reasons. The French just like the Euro because it got rid of the Deutschmark, the Germans like the ECB being in Frankfurt, the Italians like having a currency that's a little less comic opera than the lira, the Belgians think they'll really run the show, etc. VodkaPundit says the Euro won't for just one hard economic reason: Labor has to be exactly as mobile as a currency is widespread. Are unemployed Germans really going to move to Greece during a downturn in Germany, if Greece is where the jobs are? Hell no. It's not like a broke Texas oil worker migrating up to Oklahoma, is it? So the money supply and interest rates (the most common ways of fighting recession) will stay too high in Germany where the jobs aren't, and too low in Greece where the jobs are (in this fictional example). Germany will stay mired in recession while Greece goes into semi-ballistic inflation. Smart? Nope. Europe will figure it out -- hopefully before they Argentina. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Dan and Steve up north PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 11:20:18 AM ----- BODY: Dan and Steve up north at Happy Fun Pundit have a murderously funny take-down of Ted Rall's latest attempt at a cartoon. The only detail Dan forgot to include is that not only is Rall not funny, he also can't draw. VodkaPundit "discovered" Happy Fun Pundit last night, and now wishes to take back at least half of the nasty things he's said about Canada, Canadians, and Molson Ice. Apparently, Mark Steyn is not alone in the Land O' Moose. However, VodkaPundit reserves the right to keep making fun of the pseudo-French of Quebec, Bill Murray in The Razor's Edge, and the entire upper two-thirds of Minnesota, just to be safe. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Day Late and a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 11:28:11 AM ----- BODY: A Day Late and a Laugh Short Damn, I wish I'd remembered this yesterday, before Cyrus Vance had completely assumed room temperature. Upon being told that former president Calvin Coolidge was dead, Dorothy Parker asked, "How could they tell?" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Whew! We only have one PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 11:34:42 AM ----- BODY: Whew! We only have one more day until the long-awaited return of The Onion. Meantime, serve yourself up a hot and steamy new bowl of Uthant. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Make sure to give Jay PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 11:42:49 AM ----- BODY: Make sure to give Jay Nordlinger's Impromptus a good reading today. You can skip the depressing child porn bit, but the opener on Helen Thomas, the closer on Cuba, and everything else in between is well worth your time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Too bored to make a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 11:53:45 AM ----- BODY: Too bored to make a link. Jonathan Alter says some things about some stuff over at MSNBC. Nappy time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: James Dunnigan, the smartest kid PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 12:22:03 PM ----- BODY: James Dunnigan, the smartest kid in the class on military and historical affairs, has this to say about how we won so big, so fast, in Stanland. Here's a hint: It was much more about brains than about bombs. That is, if you're willing to admit that without brains, there's no money. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogger was down, it's a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 03:31:37 PM ----- BODY: Blogger was down, it's a slow news day, kids, and VodkaPundit needs to pay a visit to the sick'n'snuffly VodkaFiance. Hell, even Glenn Reynolds has slowed down the pace today, and OpinionJournal Best Of the Web only got in one really lovely pun. So I'll see you at the bar tonight. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The mysterious owner of The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 05:46:52 PM ----- BODY: The mysterious owner of The Rallying Point was good enough to give me a posting over his way, so I'd like to say thanks and return the favor. We don't know much about the good gentleman, except that he's damn funny and much better at coding HTML than yours truly. Thanks! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: John Walker, the so-called "American PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 06:03:59 PM ----- BODY: John Walker, the so-called "American Taliban," will be tried in federal court on charges of abetting terrorism. This will be a civilian trial, with full 5th Amendment rights to overblown publicity, a smart but morally corrupt and very wealthy attorney in a bad suit, and a really sweet book deal. I'd like to think that during World War II, if we found one of Our Boys wearing SS insignia, that someone would have had the kindness and sense enough to have shot him very quickly and as quietly as possible. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call -- final word PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/15/2002 09:58:33 PM ----- BODY: Last Call -- final word for the night Instead of attempting something funny tonight, I'll simply point you to The Onion. They're back after Christmas vacation, still with the best satire on the web. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I didn't get in a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/16/2002 11:42:58 AM ----- BODY: I didn't get in a single good mean rant yesterday, and it looks like today will be even slower. So to keep yourself entertained, check out today's Non Sequitur. Wiley is a genius. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Over at AndrewSullivan.com, Andrew has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/16/2002 11:57:54 AM ----- BODY: Over at AndrewSullivan.com, Andrew has a new Susan Sontag Award nominee. Uberleftwing Guardian columnist Charlotte Raven writes, "Back home in Loonsville, our misfits have two choices. Play baseball, date cheerleaders and dance in formation at parties or declare yourself a Nietzschean Übermensch, get fucked up on heroin, refuse to accept the constraints of monogamy and write songs about killing your wife." That's your typical anti-American nutjob, coming on especially strong for a Brit. However, she does make a good point about line dancing. Living in horse country, I've seen line dancers in action, which led to a new VodkaPundit Theory: Line dancing is the first step in establishing a Fascist dictatorship. Look, anytime you have a large group of people doing the exact same thing at the exact same time, it can't be good. People who line dance on Friday night will be goosestepping by Monday and lining up Jews for the ovens on Thursday. It just makes VodkaPundit ill. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's going to be another PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/17/2002 11:00:05 AM ----- BODY: It's going to be another slow posting day, kids. The good folks at Sprint are back, trying to figure out why my broadband signal keeps degrading. I hear Fixed Wireless is a really nice service. All I know is, after 13 months, mine still doesn't work. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Apologies for the lack of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/18/2002 03:34:27 PM ----- BODY: Apologies for the lack of posts, but we're still experiencing technical difficulties. Meantime, VodkaPundit scores a big win. Allow myself to quote myself, if I may misquote Austin Powers. Way back last week, I wrote: "Tina Brown's Talk magazine is 55 million bucks in the hole. That's 19 millions dollars better than Salon.com, and with Talk, at least you got something to line the bird cage with. So which will survive? My guess is Salon will -- and you read it here first." And now Matt Drudge reports that Talk has finally been shut up. Er, shut down. Advantage: VodkaPundit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Glenn Reynolds was good enough PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 10:10:17 AM ----- BODY: Glenn Reynolds was good enough to point us toward this Mirror editorial falsely accusing the US of torturing Afghan detainees at Gitmo. The details are so gory I almost wish they were true. According the the Geneva conventions, if an enemy officer is captured disguised in civies, you're supposed to shoot him. Remember that famous anti-war picture from Vietnam of the evil South Vietmanese officer giving the nine millimeter retirement plan to some poor schmuck? Well, that poor schmuck was a North Vietnamese officer trying to hide as a civillian -- so he got what was legally coming to him. Those Taliban are lucky we prefer to call them detainees. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Drudge links to a report PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 10:25:31 AM ----- BODY: Drudge links to a report in The Times (of London) that we bugged the hell out of the new Chinese version of Air Force One. VodkaPundit thinks that the Chinese found the bugs we wanted them to find. I'd claim you read it here first, but this is the last we'll hear about it -- if the CIA did it right, that is. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Almost Forgot: Happy MLK Day, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 10:28:14 AM ----- BODY: Almost Forgot: Happy MLK Day, kids. Remember, do not judge a man by the color of his skin, but by the content of his martini glass. If it's empty, then ask if he'd like another. And after enough martinis, we'll all feel warmth and brotherhood and hopefully forget to hate each other for idiotic reasons. I can't remember who, but years ago I heard a stand up comic say, "Racism is stupid because there are so many legitimate reasons to hate people. Like stupidity." Amen. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Non Sequitur sums up PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 10:34:55 AM ----- BODY: Today's Non Sequitur sums up VodkaPundit's operating philosophy quickly and with a great chuckle. Read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: By The Way... We'll be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 10:41:34 AM ----- BODY: By The Way... We'll be posting from an unusual location for the next couple weeks, where we can't access the usual email link. But I do promise to catch up on all email after dark. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bill Safire is pulling a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 10:53:29 AM ----- BODY: Bill Safire is pulling a Friedman. Thomas Friedman is another columnist over at the New York Times who is so dead-on with 90% of what he writes that the 10% crap is SO frustrating that it makes you want to pull out your hair. I can't remember who came up with that observation, but it is certainly apt. Anyway, in his column on human cloning today, Safire writes: "No to cloning tomorrow's people; yes to cloning cells that cure today's people. Because most of us agree, that will become law and policy." I wish, Bill. Bush's council is so stacked with anti-cloners that I'm afraid even petri-dish cloning of human cells will be outlawed. And as I wrote in an especially vicious rant last week (scroll down), that would be a crime. Wake up, Mr. President -- you're on the wrong side of this issue. And stop "gushing" over the President's panel, Mr. Safire; it could easily lean the wrong way. And then so could Congress. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hey, kids -- something GOOD PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 11:02:27 AM ----- BODY: Hey, kids -- something GOOD on the New York Times op-ed page. Check out Dick Lugar's dissection of the Daschle-Harkin farm bill. Of course, just seeing "Daschle-Harkin" should tell you everything you need to know about this proposed legislation: Spendy AND preachy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Read this. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 11:15:16 AM ----- BODY: Read this. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Yasser Arafat says he's willing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 01:50:52 PM ----- BODY: Yasser Arafat says he's willing to go out a martyr. C'mon, guys -- someone hand him a pistol already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This story in the Washington PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 01:56:00 PM ----- BODY: This story in the Washington Post says Russia wants to negotiate down our missile defense shield. I'm not a big fan of missile defense, although I'm sure some sort will be built. So sure, in fact, that I see only two restraints on the project: Money and technology. And nothing Russia does or says will add a third limit. You read it here first, kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Newsweek is offering early retirement PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 02:49:41 PM ----- BODY: Newsweek is offering early retirement to pare down salary and labor costs during the current downturn. I realize he doesn't meet the magazine's 55-year-old minimum age limit, but will someone please please please tell Jonathan Alter to look into this deal? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: In this AP story, we PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/21/2002 04:21:45 PM ----- BODY: In this AP story, we learn that Saddam Hussein is trying to figure out how to further mobilize the Iraqi people against possible US/Coalition attacks. First off, how do you further mobilize an already totally-militarized nation? Second, let's hope this means lower standards for the Republican Guards. Third, I do believe that, if successful, we'll simply get an even more target-rich environment. If that's what they're still calling it, anyway. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: An (un?)intentionally funny story in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 10:35:37 AM ----- BODY: An (un?)intentionally funny story in The Times (of London) reports that Taliban and al Qaeda prisoners at Gitmo are being treated to Froot Loops and bagels. No wonder the granola crowd is crying abuse -- those poor souls are being denied their unalienable right to bran fiber. Question: After having Froot Loops, will any of them ever want to go back to Afghanistan or Saudi? Hell, we're even broadcasting prayers for them five times a day. When they see they can practice their religion AND get tasty sugar-based breakfast foods, I think we'll convert more than a few to the American Way of Life. After the war, VodkaPundit says you'll see expat Taliban living happily in the good ol' USA. And you read it here first, kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Israel is moving into Nablus PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 10:42:08 AM ----- BODY: Israel is moving into Nablus after yet another terror attack by a madman Palestinian. VodkaPundit believes this is the beginning of the end for Arafat. And the end could come even quicker than anyone reasonable thinks. It's a good thing VodkaPundit is rarely reasonable. Seriously, Arafat can't (won't) keep the peace. He doesn't know how and even if he did, he would have no interest. Even FARC down in Colombia has learned negotiation is the way to go, but Yasser is just too old school. Sure, yes, of course, Israel needs to stop tearing down Palestinian homes and stop putting up new settlements. But that pales in comparison to Arafat's war of terror. For the sake of the entire Middle East, I hope Arafat is taken out by his own people, rather than the Israelis. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Kathy Kinsley is VodkaPundit's new PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 10:49:10 AM ----- BODY: Kathy Kinsley is VodkaPundit's new Favorite Woman Other Maybe Than Kate Hepburn And Virginia Postrel Who He Isn't Actually Engaged To. How'd Kathy earn such a wonderfully simple title? By giving me a very nice notice and link on her site this morning. VodkaPundit will be returning the favor, right after this cup of coffee. Thanks, Kathy -- and may the Bellicose Women Brigade fight on! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Daily Glenn Reynolds Link. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 10:57:00 AM ----- BODY: The Daily Glenn Reynolds Link. Our favorite InstaPundit grabbed a report this morning that Neil Bush (presidential brother) is trying to get Saudis to hire someone (ahem, cough cough) to help with their media image in this country. Glenn, remember that this is the same Bush who testified before Congress that he got a "sweetheart deal" during the S&L Mess way back when. He ain't the brightest bit o' wheat in the bushel. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Personal Note: It's a lovely PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 11:18:42 AM ----- BODY: Personal Note: It's a lovely spring-like day here in Colorado Springs. If this is global warming, I'm all in favor. Might take the catalytic converter off the Sebring and just let that baby idle for a month or three. Anyone know where to get some good CFCs? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: What's Wrong With Islam? Andrew PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 12:01:21 PM ----- BODY: What's Wrong With Islam? Andrew Sullivan led me to David Brooks' piece today on why Islam breeds so many idiots. Er, martyrs. No, wait -- idiots. I hadn't even finished the article (no jokes about attention span, please) when a thought (no jokes here, either) hit me (please, I've earned it). Islam is young -- 1,400 years versus 2,000 for Christianity and well over 5,000 for Judaism. Now, let's look at Christianity circa A.D. 1,400. Do I even have to paint much of a picture for you? Superstitious, persecutorial, all-controlling, unreformed -- and we hadn't even gotten to the delights of the Inquisition yet. So is all this bloodshed just a case of Islam being immature? Will age bring wisdom to this young, bloody-minded upstart? Time will tell. But in the meantime, we have to do two things: 1) Keep our powder dry, and; 2) Keep lots of powder. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Some very special writing from PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 12:19:40 PM ----- BODY: Some very special writing from Rick Perlstein on today's NYT op-ed page. We bloggers know that intellectual discourse -- with the sotty exception of this web site -- is alive and well and blogging away. The traditional media, writing for eighth-graders, laments the "loss" of all that high falutin' chatter. Perlstein sees the light. It's not in the papers, or most of the magazines, but it IS alive in coffee houses and weblogs and his Brooklyn neighborhood and lots of other places, too. I somewhat doubt I'd agree with much else of what Perlman, or his neighborhood buddies write, but that's hardly the point. The point is, we live in a Golden Age of discourse -- and the traditional media are mad because they've chosen to aim for the lowest common denominator. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Best of the Web today PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 12:55:49 PM ----- BODY: Best of the Web today shows us this story about how our poor detainees at Gitmo are having to take orders from female gaurds. Bellicose Women rock! And didn't Glenn Reynolds suggest something very similar to this way back in the early days of warblogging? Something about having our female soldiers kick some Islamist ass, anyway. This is just a start, kids, just a start. Culture will prove to be the biggest daisy-cutter in this war -- and from Beijing to Paris, every "street" wants a piece of American culture. UPDATE: Has VodkaPundit been especially serious today? Haven't had a proper cocktail since Saturday, so please excuse me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I read about the loss PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 01:35:27 PM ----- BODY: I read about the loss of Peggy Lee first thing this morning, but wasn't ready to comment on it until just now. On second thought, I'm still not ready. But I will say this: Tonight I'll play my well-worn copy of her Greatest Hits, sip a lovely tumbler of Oban, and remember what it felt like the first time I heard that voice. We've lost Ella, Billie, Carmen... and now Peggy. There are none left. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit scoops InstaPundit! Earlier today, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 03:42:43 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit scoops InstaPundit! Earlier today, I linked to Rich Perlman's NYT bit on the "loss" of intellectual discourse, and replied: "It's not in the papers, or most of the magazines, but it IS alive in coffee houses and weblogs." Now Glenn writes, "Ahem. Mr. Perlstein? You may want to visit Blogland." There is only one explaination for the scoop -- Glenn must be VERY busy today. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Peter Principle Proves Overly PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 03:56:02 PM ----- BODY: The Peter Principle Proves Overly Optimistic ABC news hottie Connie Chung has been hired away to marginally-less-annoying CNN. Connie has been promoted WAY over her level of incompetence. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Devil Incarnate... er, AOL PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 04:20:12 PM ----- BODY: The Devil Incarnate... er, AOL Time-Warner is suing Microsoft for sinking its very own Netscape Navigator web browser. Reality check, people -- AOL has the largest single base of web users (30+ million and growing) and forces each one to use MS Internet Explorer every time they log on to AOL. So excuse me, but couldn't AOL have given its own browser a big shot in the arm, simply by integrating it into AOL? Furthermore, AOL's contract with MS for Explorer ran out months ago -- yet they haven't replaced it with Navigator. Is this a nuisance suit? Is it public stupidity? Is Steve Case downing more vodka martinis than VodkaPundit? CONSPIRACY THEORY UPDATE: Could a far-sighted Herr Case have bought heavily-discounted Netscape all those years ago so that he might someday win a triple-damages anti-trust lawsuit against Microsoft? Worth pondering. CONSPIRACY UPDATE UPDATE: Think about this... not only was Netscape stock cheap when AOL picked it up (Netscape was already losing to MS) but AOL hasn't exactly put a lot of money into it. They barely even did their own programming for Navigator 6, since it was all done open source. And AOL certainly didn't spend any money integrating the new or old browsers into AOL software. So it's not like they'll lose much if this suit doesn't pan out. An acceptable risk? As Les Nesman once said, "Conspiracy? I wonder..." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: From the I Should Have PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 06:35:26 PM ----- BODY: From the I Should Have Caught This Yesterday Department: The drumbeat started with William Saleten in Slate a week or two ago, arguing that Bush is a good war leader because, well, he's dumb as a brick. A couple other writers have taken similar tacks since and before then. Now, I'm not here to boost the President's IQ any more than I am to boost the Raven's Superbowl chances, but there's a piece from the Sunday New York Times that I really wish I hadn't been too hungover to find in a more timely manner. In the Week In Review, David E. Sanger writes, "In retrospect, what made President Bush so effective in the weeks after Sept. 11 was exactly the characteristic that lent itself to parody in the months before — his proclivity to describe the world in black-and-white terms." Black and white -- in other words, simple. As in "simpleton." VodkaPundit will wager an entire evening of vodka martinis that the following becomes the post-war left wing mantra: "OK, Bush was the right guy for the war, but fighting the peace isn't simple, it's quite complex and so now we need a smart guy like a Leiberman or Gore." And the Left won't even wait until the end of the war -- just long enough after the current campaign that they can still seem patriotic. Remember, you read it here first, kids. Any takers on the bet? UPDATE: Extremely Smart Person Fred Boness writes in with, "When I read this in your blog I thought it described exactly Churchill losing to Atlee in the closing days of WWII." Fred is exactly right, and that thought was no where anything like near my brain. Now, I don't belong to either major party, but I'd rather keep W in 2004 than any Democrat likely to win the nomination. So that leaves the question: Is Bush more able to turn a war win into a political win than was Churchill? Meantime, a raised glass to Mr. Boness -- the VodkaPundit Salute! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Those wacky kids over at PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 07:19:48 PM ----- BODY: Those wacky kids over at Libertarian Samizdata were kind/silly (pick one) enough to grant a permalink to yours truly. Thanks, guys -- now get back to work! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Worrysome stuff from Nat Hentoff PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 07:37:02 PM ----- BODY: Worrysome stuff from Nat Hentoff that's well worth three minutes of your time. Why am I the only libertarian blogger linking this? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call When CNN makes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/22/2002 07:58:23 PM ----- BODY: Last Call When CNN makes the promo for whatever Connie Chung's new show turns out to be, I think it would be in bad taste to use that zipper noise again like they did with Paula Zahn. But how about a dub of Ross Perot saying something about "that giant sucking sound"? Just a thought. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Jesse Jackson will be in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 10:12:54 AM ----- BODY: Jesse Jackson will be in Houston Friday, to lead Enron workers in protest over... something, I guess. Perhaps not enough black workers lost their life savings. No word on how a bankrupt Enron will come up with enough cash to make Jackson go away. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Daniel Silliman, who I presume PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 10:23:54 AM ----- BODY: Daniel Silliman, who I presume is an Objectivist, has started a new blog called The Atlas Society. At first glance, I'd say Daniel could use a stiff shot of 80 proof medicinal ethanol, but his site could be worth keeping an eye on. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Matt Drudge is usually good PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 10:29:19 AM ----- BODY: Matt Drudge is usually good for an unintentional laugh or three. Today, he links to a gorgeous AP story. In it, former Israeli PM Ehud Barak claims Yasser Arafat "maybe" really be a terrorist. In a further development, he also accuses fellow former PM Bibi Netenyahu of "sometimes breathing air." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: John Walker "Paul" Lindh returned PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 10:40:14 AM ----- BODY: John Walker "Paul" Lindh returned to the US today aboard a military plane. There are no confirmed reports whether he will accept an offered visiting professor position at Berkeley next fall. OK, OK -- I promise to cut down on the easy one-liners and get back to what passes for analysis in this gin joint. But not until after the extra-large Lightnote Blend kicks in. And if that doesn't work, we're gonna go straight to freebasing Folger's Crystals. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Thanks to the good people PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 10:45:27 AM ----- BODY: Thanks to the good people over at Libertarian Samizdata for linking this this Jerusalem Post story about new battles between Hizbullah and the IDF on Israel's northern border. As VodkaPundit opined just this week, the latest series of rows between Hamas/Hizbullah/etc and Israel could be the beginning of the end for Arafat. And if these battles continue to grow as reported in stories like these, then someone is gonna owe me a drink. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Back to Samizdata again for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 10:55:35 AM ----- BODY: Back to Samizdata again for a moment. VodkaPundit is pleased to report that not only is their Croatian correspondant Natalija Radic recovering nicely from her nasty bout with the flu, but her pictures are back up on the site. VodkaPundit is a leg man, a very happily engaged leg man at that. But Natalija... well, scoot on over and you'll see. Seriously, get well Natalija. And like your comrades at LS, keep up the great work. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: As usual,Tom Friedman makes some PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 11:09:27 AM ----- BODY: As usual,Tom Friedman makes some cogent points about Arab denial and hatred of the west in the NYT this morning. Friedman worries that even after our unqualified military success, educated, worldly Arabs still deny Osama -- or any Muslim -- could have pulled off the 9/11 attacks. VodkaPundit needs to ask -- does it really matter if they believe us, so long as they fear us? Will future Talibans in any country give the kind of support al Qaeda got in Stanland, knowing that we can make them dead or on the lam in three months flat? It would be nice if the Arab street started dealing with, well, reality. It would certainly make the world safer -- including for Arabs. But so long as they fear us, that's a pretty good second choice. And so long as the Arab world, to paraphrase Ralph Peters, fails to cope with modernity, we'll have to settle for that second choice. The coffee must be kicking in. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Glenn Reynolds Link Department. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 11:15:19 AM ----- BODY: Today's Glenn Reynolds Link Department. Glenn has a great piece today on Tech Central Station -- a worthy site, even without Reynolds work. Anyway, he looks at Leon Kass' bioethics panel, and doesn't exactly give it a thumbs up. VodkaPundit has gone on at least two vicious rants in this space against Federal bars on cloning and stem cell research. Maybe because VodkaPundit Sr might still be alive today if it weren't for those fucking unqualified babysitters at the FDA. Anyway, go read Glenn's column. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More snide stupidity from Maureen PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 12:02:26 PM ----- BODY: More snide stupidity from Maureen Dowd as expected. Dowd attempts to make fun of the Bush administration for looking/feeling all victorious for the, uh, victory in Afghanistan. She writes, "I hesitate to interrupt the victory laps, the chesty posing, the passing out of medals. But something in me really wants to know: Is the war over? Did we win it or not?" Apparently, Ms Dowd doesn't understand that it's OK to celebrate a victorious battle before the war is over. Did the Russians not celebrate destroying the entire German 6th Army at Stalingrad, more than two years before the end of WWII? Did we not celebrate Gettysburg? Did the Japanese not clap after Pearl Harbor? Maureen, you're too stupid to pour piss out of a boot -- even if the directions how were written on the heel. The Administration has earned this moment. And thankfully, I think they're all aware enough to understand that this glow is just a moment -- and that tougher battles in this long war loom ahead. Hopefully, our success will be as thorough as Grant's over the South or Zhukov's over Das Reich, and not fleeting like the Japanese Combined Fleet at Pearl Harbor. But in the meantime, our armed forces and, yes, President Bush & Co deserve a self-pat on the back and an atta boy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: From the AP, the world's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 12:21:08 PM ----- BODY: From the AP, the world's oldest woman turned 115 today. However, we're still unsure what to get her, since an Amazon.com birthday Wish List search yielded no results for Helen Thomas. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hot Out of Modesto: The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 01:08:26 PM ----- BODY: Hot Out of Modesto: The Modesto Bee reports that DNC chairman Tony Coelho has turned on Gary Condit. This should come as no surprise, since most anything with a pulse turns on Condit. Seriously, though... I think I am serious. No really -- Coelho says it's a damned shame that Condit "decided to run again," but apparently had nothing to say about the possibly murderous reasons why that would not be such a good thing. Damn, I love political courage! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: My second-favorite blog, Best of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 01:14:43 PM ----- BODY: My second-favorite blog, Best of the Web, has this snippet: "'Terrorist "refugees" from Osama Bin Laden's al-Qaeda group are being given shelter in Syria and Syrian-occupied Lebanon,' Israel's Aretz Sheva TV News reports, citing Maj.-Gen. Aharon Ze'evi, head of Israel's defense intelligence agency." Assad may be as close to the ash-heap of history as VodkaPundit thinks Arafat is. Time to let the Israelis off the leash? And no, I'm NOT asking Colin Powell. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: USS Clueless proves once again PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 01:39:31 PM ----- BODY: USS Clueless proves once again that the blogs are smarter and better informed than most of the pros. Click the link then scroll down to "Stardate 20020122.1103" to see what I mean. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: My friends over on the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 01:49:16 PM ----- BODY: My friends over on the limp-wristed side of libertarianism need to read this. Meantime, two cheers for a muscular, libertarian foreign policy! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: News first rumored over at PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 02:01:15 PM ----- BODY: News first rumored over at InstaPundit has proved sadly true. Those of us who beleive in a limited state lost one of our true heros today with the death of Harvard's Robert Nozick. I first discovered him my freshman year at the University of Missouri-Columbia, digging into his book Anarchy, State and Utopia, with that zeal for ideas possessed by every young convert to libertarianism. Yesterday the world of music lost Peggy Lee. Today the world of ideas lost one of its most musical writers. Robert Nozick will be missed. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The New York Daily News PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 02:55:35 PM ----- BODY: The New York Daily News claims that a famous TV-movie producer will be making a Rudi G bioflick. No word yet on casting the ex-mayor, although he could always play the role himself. However, casting for the Twin Towers will reportedly be filled out by Pamela Anderson. I swear to Whomever I'll try to get away from the Leno-type stuff tomorrow. Just feeling silly and giddy today. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Funniest Thing Said All Week PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 03:10:18 PM ----- BODY: Funniest Thing Said All Week Department Will Vehrs' print edition of PunditWatch starts off with this: "Of those columnists who do not specialize in foreign policy, Punditwatch notes that only Charles Krauthammer has not commented on the [Enron] scandal. That may only be because declaring war and invading Enron is not feasible." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Thanks to Sitemeter, I can PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/23/2002 03:26:55 PM ----- BODY: Thanks to Sitemeter, I can report that someone has been cruising VodkaPundit via ca.gov -- that's the California state government network, kids. So remind me later to have two cocktails, then savagely rip into my former residence. There's just something wrong about a state that requires you to fill out environmental impact statements in triplicate before taking a leak. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Strong Wake-Up Coffee Department We PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 10:18:09 AM ----- BODY: Strong Wake-Up Coffee Department We woke up to this lede in a World Tribune story: "Western diplomatic sources said Al Qaida insurgents have infiltrated the West Bank and Gaza Strip in an effort to determine whether the movement should make the Palestinian areas into their new home. The sources said Al Qaida appears to prefer the Gaza Strip over more distant locations such as Somalia." VodkaPundit started saying Monday that Arafat's end was going to come sooner rather than later -- and perhaps sooner than most reasonable people would think. If this report is true, then the Palestinian Authority has become the new Taliban, i.e. the new national host of al Qaida. If that's the case, then they should be treated in exactly the same way. Don't worry about Yasser pulling a Mullah Omar routine and escaping. We won't be trying to stop his escape with 1,000 mile carrier air sorties and local tribal warriors. Oh, no. We'll have the entire Israeli Defense Force on our side. Well, minus whatever they need to keep a very watchful eye on the Syrian front. Just enough to make sure Little Assad Junior remembers why he doesn't want to play host to al Qaida. Mr. Arafat, don't even bother to pack -- you ain't going nowhere. This isn't Jordan, this isn't Beirut, and it certainly isn't Tunis. It's WWIII, and you're on the wrong side. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: John Walker "Paul" Lindh, that PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 10:27:39 AM ----- BODY: John Walker "Paul" Lindh, that wacky center square of Doc Martin Mujahadin, appeared in federal court today and claimed to understand the charges against him. Lindh impressed reporters by speaking coherently and not shooting lightning out of his eyeballs. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If no one else has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 10:40:08 AM ----- BODY: If no one else has yet, I'd like to claim credit for coining the phrase "Doc Martin Mujahadin" to describe John Walker "Paul" Lindh. A vodka martini to any reader who can disprove my claim with an earlier reference. Also, as many as six kudos. Also, I do believe VodkaPundit is the first to have made a running Paul Lind (you youngsters won't get it) joke out of the traitor. And you doubted I really drink. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This story in the Orlando PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 10:43:50 AM ----- BODY: This story in the Orlando Sun-Sentinel claims Janet Reno, in her bid for Florida governor, has little support even in die-hard Democrat Broward County. And even less support outside the tall, furry, and square-jawed segment of the transvestite caucus. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Random Geopolitical Thought: Pick PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 10:56:10 AM ----- BODY: Today's Random Geopolitical Thought: Pick up a copy of Robert Kaplan's The Coming Anarachy. Not only is it a scary-yet-comforting (or is that comforting-yet-scary?) look into the near future, but it's a damn well-written travelogue into some of the places our armed forces might soon be wandering. The reason I mention it, however, is this: We're now hearing stories of how China is getting involved in Afghanistan. Not too worrysome by itself, but you should take a look at the whole China picture. They lay claim still to Tawain, to the Spratley Islands, and probably the nice half of Siberia. In addition, they want to play the Great Game in Central Asia and build a military with a truly global reach. But I'm not losing any sleep. Hell, I barely give China a thought. Yeah, they can cause us some trouble short-term, and maybe even kill a whole lot of their Taiwanese brethren. These are things we need to prepare for and discourage. But long term, China is not a problem. Why not? Well, Kaplan tells us that the future of real military power isn't about the nice Tom Clancy gadgets, but about culture. The ability not just to think up and build the shiny new toys, but to deploy them creatively, to combine them freely with global information in order to use them effectively, etc. The future of the military is about speed, decisiveness, and creativity -- not in Soviet-era five year building plans for the latest T-80 variant. There's only one big-league country that can do all that. And it ain't China. OK, we'll go back to the news now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: She drinks single-malt Scotch, can PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 11:19:08 AM ----- BODY: She drinks single-malt Scotch, can quote Patton at length, and knows the real value of Charmin. For that, Dropscan's lovely Shiloh Blucher gets a well-earned spot in our Permalinks over there on the left. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Fed Honcho Alan Greenspan predicts PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 11:37:02 AM ----- BODY: Fed Honcho Alan Greenspan predicts the recession will soon end. Says, "in the long run, we'll all be rich." OK, so I made up that last part. Screw Keynes, anyway. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I seriously dig this Telegraph PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 11:41:50 AM ----- BODY: I seriously dig this Telegraph UK story. Says Israeli tanks all but have Arafat in a "checkmate." Then lines about "inching closer" to his Ramallah HQ. It's almost time for VodkaPundit to pat himself on the back again. Next guilty pleasure: Picking apart the NYT op-ed page. Stay tuned. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You go, Andrew! Andrew Sullivan PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 12:04:22 PM ----- BODY: You go, Andrew! Andrew Sullivan continues to rip new ones all over the place in regards to Enron. But my favorite jabs are in the general direction of Bill Kristol. Those idiot "National Greatness" Republicans over at The Weekly Standard are about two goose-steps away from being just another Pat Buchanan. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Congruent Forces: Last Friday, Krauthammer PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 12:34:12 PM ----- BODY: Congruent Forces: Last Friday, Krauthammer wrote that, during wars that matter, Americans are "immune to casualties." It's what Kennedy meant when he talked about paying any price and bearing and burden to protect freedom. Now word comes from the UK that Britons overwhelmingly support US treatment of detainees at Gitmo, no matter what lies their left-liberal press tries to spoon-feed them. These two snippets help explain why VodkaPundit unashamedly calls England "the Mother Country." Most of my forefathers got their asses kicked by Brits at one time or another. Hell, some of us got kicked out of England itself -- literally 86ed from the entire country. And yet I hold no grudge against the UK, even though I'm famous for doing so for even the slightest slight. Why? I could pay the usual lip service in thanks to England for inventing modern individual liberty, but that's not it. Not all of it, anyway. I think, instead, the most important thing we mongrel Americans have kept from our pasty-white cousins is character. The same Jack Bull stubbornness that produced the Magna Carta, that created, endured, then got rid of Oliver Cromwell, that made for such hearty pioneers who first dared tame North America, that stood up to Napoleon when no one else would, that lost an entire generation of young men rather than see the Continent under the Kaiser's fist, that survived the Blitz, and that lost an Empire while keeping a stiff upper lip. These are the reasons I love the Britons. Except for one more. In the last eighty years, the Brits have watched their upstart younger cousins first grow as strong, then far stronger, than themselves. The French sneered at us. The Germans did worse. And everyone else resented us at best. But not the Brits. Through every crisis from the Berlin Airlift through the Present Mess, they have stood with us shoulder to shoulder -- even when their elites told them not to. And it is that strength of character we inherited from them which will allow us to prevail in the new global war. Thank you, Britain. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I think everyone is linking PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 12:54:51 PM ----- BODY: I think everyone is linking to Bill Safire's column today, and with damn good reason. If you haven't read it yet, then do so. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Brilliant writing by... someone over PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/24/2002 01:35:17 PM ----- BODY: Brilliant writing by... someone over at Strategy Page (it's an unsigned bit). If you want to find out how military intelligence interrogations really work, then read this. But by all means do not read it if you are a member of the US or UK press. Oops -- they've managed to studiously ignore this kind of thing for sixty years. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sorry for the slow post PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/25/2002 10:19:37 AM ----- BODY: Sorry for the slow post pace yesterday, but I wrote (what I think were) a couple of real quality pieces and wanted people to see those easily, rather than scrolling through the usual long collection of notes, asides, and bad gags. I promise to get back to being funny and useless today. While I try to wake up with a seriously powerful cup of Starbuck's Yukon Blend and catch up with the headlines, why don't you scroll down to "Congruent Forces" and then past that to "Today's Random Geopolitical Thought." I promise neither one is too heavy for before lunch. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sarge Stryker is back from PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/25/2002 11:01:16 AM ----- BODY: Sarge Stryker is back from wherever he was, and with a vengeance. If he keeps up at this rate, he'll make Glenn Reynolds look like Cal Coolidge. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More smarts from Victor Davis PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/25/2002 11:51:07 AM ----- BODY: More smarts from Victor Davis Hanson in today's National Review Online. Check this out: "Rarely do our scholars, pundits, and social commentators apologize for completely getting it wrong about their earlier admonitions during the last four months — misjudging the Arab street, the Afghan winter, the Northern Alliance, fighting during Ramadan, U.S. air power, etc." It only gets better from there, leading to a stirring conclusion: "Should there be a thousand traitorous Johnny Walkers in detention, the minutiae of their cases should not warrant more concern than would the life of a single Marine." Click this link and read the whole thing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Washington Times reports we're PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/25/2002 01:02:43 PM ----- BODY: The Washington Times reports we're slapping sanctions on China because -- one mo' time -- they're exporting components for WMDs. (That's weapons of mass destruction, kids. Nukes, Bio, Chem = NBC or WMD.) Anyway, don't bother to read this yawner. Instead, truck over to Amazon and pick up a copy of Gordon Chang's The Coming Collapse of China. This book has been my bedside reading all week, and it's part of what led to yesterday's minidissertation on a similar subject. Chang's writing isn't the most supple, but he paints a convincing picture. Namely, that China's refusal to truly reform their banks, coupled with what's going to be their first real competition -- thanks to the WTO -- means a short, unhappy future for the Chinese Communist Party. VodkaPundit says China won't go the warlord route. Not quite, anyway. But when the center in Beijing collapses -- and it will -- no new center will quickly arise to replace it. We'll see competing governments, ala Tapei vs Beijing, only writ much, much larger. Catch up on your Robert D. Kaplan and Ralph Peters over at Parameters for a more brutal, much better written glimpse into the future. Sorry for not having the links, but I won't have access to those until this evening. UPDATE: Here's that Ralph Peters link over at Parameters. In case you're not familiar, Parameters is a quarterly publication of the US Army War College. Don't think Rambo, think Thucydides. Very smart stuff. You can also find Peters' superb fiction on Amazon. Same goes for Kaplan's non-fiction. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The I Give Up Making PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/25/2002 01:18:19 PM ----- BODY: The I Give Up Making Fun of Jesse Because Other People Do It So Much Better Department: For the sake of all that is unholy, click on over to Happy Fun Pundit for the best take down of Jesse Jackson since his mistress sued his ass last year. Best line? "All your profit are belong to us!" You ancient gamers got a kick out of that one, anyway. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's time for VodkaPundit to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/25/2002 08:23:00 PM ----- BODY: It's time for VodkaPundit to get down to the serious weekend drinking. Also, the VodkaFiance is demanding fettuccine Alfredo -- and no one makes it better than yours truly. Enjoy the weekend, kids. See you bright and not-so-early Monday. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I usually refuse to post PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/27/2002 01:59:37 PM ----- BODY: I usually refuse to post on weekends, but this site deserves to be linked immediately. A raised glass to Next Right! And now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go play with the cat and watch the Rams. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: One Last Sunday Post Department PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/27/2002 03:22:56 PM ----- BODY: One Last Sunday Post Department David Carr at Libertarian Samizdata has a brilliant reply to my "Congruent Forces" piece from Thursday. My favorite bit: "These are the values breathed into America by the great English and Scottish enlightenment and it is why Americans like Stephen Green rightly call us The Mother Country, for the 'American Revolution' was not so much a revolution as a Civil War between the rebels trying to champion those ideas and their imperial rulers whose persistant continental wars had so wounded them." Carr argues in the same vein that Britons are being systematically denied their heritage of liberty by Europhiles and New Labour. For some real lyricism far sweeter than anything I wrote, check out his concluding paragraph. Just read the whole thing. The Rams are up 10-3. I'm going back to the game now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Oldest Joke Department TV "psychic" PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 10:06:49 AM ----- BODY: Oldest Joke Department TV "psychic" Miss Cleo has been ordered to stop calling unhappy customers, pressuring them into paying disputed bills. OK, everyone say it with me: You'd think she'd have seen this coming. The Borscht Belt will never die. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Maybe I Was Wrong After PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 10:12:47 AM ----- BODY: Maybe I Was Wrong After All Yowza. The Telegraph UK just fogged up my monitor with a hot little report on Enron. Says, "office affairs were rampant, divorce among senior executives an epidemic, and stories of couples steaming up glass-walled offices after late-night meetings were the talk of Houston." I've been saying all along that this, ahem, affair would play out worse for the Republicans -- but now it's sounding more like Clinton redux. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Worse Than I Thought PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 10:16:24 AM ----- BODY: It's Worse Than I Thought My latest Google hit came off the search for "Connie," "Chung," and "hottie." You people are as bad as me. I love you all. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Never Put Off Until Tomorrow PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 10:33:13 AM ----- BODY: Never Put Off Until Tomorrow What Can Be Put Off Until The Day After Tomorrow I keep forgetting to permalink the mighty USS Clueless. The good captain Steve, who has a truly fine first name, helms an excellent ship. Bookmark him. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It took longer than I'd PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 10:45:24 AM ----- BODY: It took longer than I'd hoped, but James Taranto of Best of the Web has finally posted his readers suggestions for new silly lawsuits. Oh, and some Simpsons humor, too. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Over on Strategy Page, Steven PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 11:03:49 AM ----- BODY: Over on Strategy Page, Steven Cole files this report on the Russian Navy. Oh boy, the Russians laid down the keel of the first of ten tiny little ships? This isn't the yawner you think it is. In fact, it's as vital to your future almost as much as it is to Russia's. For much of the last sixty years, Russia has been trying to play the superpower game. But they were sadly underequipped. You know the reason: An economy just too damn small to support power projection. Hell, even during the heady days of the '70s, when Soviet power was apparently at its apex, they couldn't properly project real power any further than Magdeburg, East Germany. Sure, their diplomats were scoring points all over Africa. They even rented out the Cuban Army to fight in Angola (in an odd historical twist, one of our big oil companies, Unocal, I think, was helping to finance the Marxists in that war. And the South Africans were good guys. Go figure. Anyway...). Real power projection requires a blue water navy. That means big ships, especially aircraft carriers. Carriers allow you to bomb anyone, anywhere, and on fairly short notice. While our Air Force was still struggling to set up one base in Kraplekistan, hte Navy was already pounding targets in Kabul. The Soviets tried to build a carrier, but the best they could do was a ski-jump looking thing that launched obsolete-at-the-time YAK-38s. Sad, really. It made the Charles de Gaulle look fearsome. The only things that kept the Soviets in the superpower game were a shitload of SS-18s and -25s, and Eighth Guards Tank Army sitting opposite the Fulda Gap. 8th GTA is now disbanded and the nuclear-tipped missiles are either rusting away or were negotiated away. So what's the big deal about the Russian Navy ordering ten little corvettes for coastal patrol duty? Easy -- ten tiny ships aren't one big one. The Russians have finally recognized that, at least for the middle term, they're out of the game. That implies that they also see that they can either play the game our way, or remain backwards, broke, and broken. And it looks like for the first time in a long time, the Russians are doing something right. I hope so -- they've suffered enough. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Screw You, Too, NYT An PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 11:14:44 AM ----- BODY: Screw You, Too, NYT An unsigned NYT editorial lambasts Bush for doing little for the environment. First, maybe they ought to blame Clinton for all that dust in Manhattan the last four months. Second... ...the environment? People, there's a war on. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Can't We Put Aside Stupid PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 11:45:10 AM ----- BODY: Can't We Put Aside Stupid Agendas And Just Think Department Bill Safire has his usual well-reported and well-reasoned take on the whole POW/unlawful combatant flap over at the State Department. The solution is simple: al Qaeda officers are unlawful combatants and may legally be shot out of spite. But no matter how much we'd be in our rights to do so, we should not shoot them -- they're too valuable as intelligence sources. al Qaeda foot soldiers, on the other hand (pun intended) are pretty much like enlisted guys everywhere -- powerless, uninformed, just following orders. Treat them as POWs and look nice to the idiots over in Europe. Officer = unlawful combatant, little guy = POW. Got that? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "Ecuador Plane Missing with 92 PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 11:50:29 AM ----- BODY: "Ecuador Plane Missing with 92 People on Board," Enron executives questioned. OK, so I made up the second part. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Fight the Fascists at Home, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 12:01:34 PM ----- BODY: Fight the Fascists at Home, Too Just when you thought AG John Ashcroft couldn't get more annoying or useless, he's ordered "nude" statues at the Justice Department covered. For months, I've said the only reason worth watching an Ashcroft press conference is the off chance of catching sight of a lone aluminum breast. And literally, that's all there is to see. But Pompous John of the Bible Belt is tired of being associated with a really well-formed, presumably very firm breast. So he ordered drapes for it. Do I have to remind him, too, that there's a damned war on? UPDATE: Shall we start a pool over how long it will take before my first Google hit using the keywords, "Ashcroft," "firm," and "breast?" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I know it is Glenn PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 12:39:59 PM ----- BODY: I know it is Glenn Reynolds' sacred duty to scoop all other bloggers all the time, but did InstaPundit have to beat VodkaPundit on this story? MSNBC reports that alcohol may ward off Alzeimers. If that's the case, why can't I ever remember where I left my drink? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit has long admired the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 03:13:00 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit has long admired the Bush family's devotion to their friends. But the time has come for CIA head George Tenet to go. Really, September 11 was reason enough to sack Tenet, but check out this new revelation from the Washington Post, courtesy of Best of the Web: "This has bin Laden all over it," Tenet said to Boren. "I've got to go." He had another reaction in the first few minutes, one that raised the possibility that the FBI and the CIA had not done all that they could to prevent the terrorist attacks from taking place. "I wonder," Tenet was overheard to say, "if it has anything to do with this guy taking pilot training." He was referring to Zacarias Moussaoui, who had been detained in August after attracting suspicion when he sought training at a Minnesota flight school. Keep in mind, this was minutes after the WTC attack. In other words, the very top guy at the CIA knew personally of the Moussaoui case, but did nothing about it. Not a goddamn thing. If we can hold accountable the former Afghan government for hosting al Qaeda, then we can -- must -- hold accountable those in our government who missed their chance to stop the attack. Heads must roll, Mr. President. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Random Thought The "civilized" world PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 03:29:09 PM ----- BODY: Random Thought The "civilized" world -- you know, those useless Belgians and whatnots -- is upset about our prisoners at Gitmo not because of how we're treating them. They're mad because they know that if those were our people, we'd have successfully rescued them by now in some daring around-the-world raid. And because no country in Europe has half that ability. So in all seriousness, allow VodkaPundit to say "Neener." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Will Warren, the poet laureate PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 03:36:59 PM ----- BODY: Will Warren, the poet laureate of the blogscene, has done it again. Take that, Jonah Goldberg! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: OK, Jonah Goldberg is off PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 03:45:55 PM ----- BODY: OK, Jonah Goldberg is off the hook today for his brilliant G-File post this afternoon. Sometimes, that man just nails it. UPDATE: You might be wondering what hook Jonah got off of today. Well. We libertarians, even the small-l variety, distrust the G-File Man because he simply (and on purpose) refuses to understand, or even properly describe, our beliefs. And we get especially wary when he uses the word "libertarian" in his stories -- it automatically increases the sensitivity of our Cringometers. Anyway, today Jonah wrote a great bit and managed to use the L-word without me feeling any sudden need to throw my mouse at the screen. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: In a post last week, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 04:13:09 PM ----- BODY: In a post last week, VodkaPundit made some rather un-PC remarks about the, uh, amplitude of brilliant LS contributor Natalija Radic's chestal region. In fact, I did so at the disparagement of her legs. New photographic evidence refutes my prior statement, and an apology is in order. Natalija, I'm sorry. I was wrong -- you have amazing legs. And for the record, my just-as-sweetly-shaped fiance now says she hates you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: One of my favorite subjects PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 09:07:20 PM ----- BODY: One of my favorite subjects of scorn, those bastards at the FDA, are still being bastards according to drug companies in this Wall Street Journal Story. In no surprise to anyone who watches the industry, the FDA bastards have slowed down the drug "approval" process. So it takes longer -- and costs more money -- to get life-saving, life-prolonging, life-improving drugs to market. All in the name of protecting the helpless consumer from the all-evil, predatory, malicious drug industry. Now, let's look at this rationally for once. Executives at drug companies owe their livelihoods to saving your life. If the drugs don't work, they don't get sold. If the drugs are deadly, the drug companies get sued into the Stone age. FDA bastards owe their livelihoods to avoiding bad headlines. One case of one drug hurting one person can ruin a bureaucrat's entire career, so it pays for him to delay making a decision. But the poor slob who died because a better drug wasn't yet approved doesn't make the headlines at all -- it's not news when a drug that's not on the market doesn't do a job it hasn't been approved for yet. You've never seen in the paper, "Air Traffic Controller Forgets to Tell Airplane It's Safe to Land, Plane Lands Safely." Says Fred Hanssan of Pharmacia in the WSJ story, "We are now beginning to see some new innovations that are approved earlier in Europe than in the U.S. This drug lag is not good." That's right, folks -- the Brusselscrats are jumping ahead of us in medicine. It's a good thing we don't have an FCA to approve new computer chips -- we'd be blogging on 386s. New 386s. FULL DISCLOSURE: VodkaPundit lost his father to a blood clot. At the time, the FDA bastards were keeping a superior blood-thinning agent off the market. The drug in question had been proven 99% safe, but those bastards at the FDA still chose to sit on their hands and wait for more data. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How The Left Was Evil PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/28/2002 09:17:03 PM ----- BODY: How The Left Was Evil Tom Tomorrow, writing on the Enron Mess, concludes with: "Villainy, fraud, sex, death and a stonewalling White House. You think this thing is just going to blow over? Excuse me while I wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes." [Italics mine] Let's get this straight. Tom gets a good giggle -- no, a tear-inducing belly laugh -- out of what he thinks is a murder. Think I'm exaggerating? Read this snippet from the same post: "We've got at least one mysterious death--the apparent suicide of a former Enron executive who, from all reports, had nothing to hide, but was expected to be a major whistleblower in the case. " Yeah, Tom doesn't have the stones to come right out and say it, but he clearly implies murder, coroner's report to the contrary. And he thinks murder is pretty damn funny when it furthers his objective of embarrassing the President. Remember the video of Osama laughing at the deaths of 2,800 Americans when those deaths furthered his political objectives? Is his mindset really that different from Mr. Tomorrow's? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All Your George Are Belongening PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 10:19:17 AM ----- BODY: All Your George Are Belongening To Us You've got to read The Chronicles of George. Whether you are or are not a techweasel, this is funny, funny stuff. I damn near wet myself. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The lovely and talented Kathy PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 10:33:31 AM ----- BODY: The lovely and talented Kathy Kinsey of On The Third Hand is getting into the blogverse business. And quite nicely, too. But then again, I've always been partial to women who sing about me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Has She Ever Downed PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:05:07 AM ----- BODY: But Has She Ever Downed That Stuff With Vodka? Florida Governor Jeb Bush's daughter Noelle was busted today for prescription fraud. Let's see... she's got political connections, a great tan, is a babe, and can get me endless Vicodin. What am I doing in Colorado again? One of these days, my fiance is going to kick my ass. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Has She Ever Downed PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:05:07 AM ----- BODY: But Has She Ever Downed That Stuff With Vodka? Florida Governor Jeb Bush's daughter Noelle was busted today for prescription fraud. Let's see... she's got political connections, a great tan, is a babe, and can get me endless Vicodin. What am I doing in Colorado again? One of these days, my fiance is going to kick my ass. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why I Love Arizona, Other PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:13:55 AM ----- BODY: Why I Love Arizona, Other Than The Phrase "But It's a Dry Heat" City Officials in Lake Havagoodtime... er, Havasu, Arizona want to take custody of a two ton statue of Lady Margaret Thatcher. The Brits built the thing, but it can't go up in the House of Commons until the Iron Lady has been dead five years. And if she has her way, that will be four years and 364 days after Hell freezes over. Roadtrip to Arizona with me, anyone? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why I Love Arizona, Other PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:13:55 AM ----- BODY: Why I Love Arizona, Other Than The Phrase "But It's a Dry Heat" City Officials in Lake Havagoodtime... er, Havasu, Arizona want to take custody of a two ton statue of Lady Margaret Thatcher. The Brits built the thing, but it can't go up in the House of Commons until the Iron Lady has been dead five years. And if she has her way, that will be four years and 364 days after Hell freezes over. Roadtrip to Arizona with me, anyone? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'm re-posting here something I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:22:55 AM ----- BODY: I'm re-posting here something I wrote late last night, just to make sure plenty of people read it. What I found made my blood boil, and it should yours, too. How The Left Was Evil Tom Tomorrow, writing on the Enron Mess, concludes with: "Villainy, fraud, sex, death and a stonewalling White House. You think this thing is just going to blow over? Excuse me while I wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes." [Italics mine] Let's get this straight. Tom gets a good giggle -- no, a tear-inducing belly laugh -- out of what he thinks is a murder. Think I'm exaggerating? Read this snippet from the same post: "We've got at least one mysterious death--the apparent suicide of a former Enron executive who, from all reports, had nothing to hide, but was expected to be a major whistleblower in the case. " Yeah, Tom doesn't have the stones to come right out and say it, but he clearly implies murder, coroner's report to the contrary. And he thinks murder is pretty damn funny when it furthers his objective of embarrassing the President. Remember the video of Osama laughing at the deaths of 2,800 Americans when those deaths furthered his political objectives? Is his mindset really that different from Mr. Tomorrow's? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'm re-posting here something I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:22:55 AM ----- BODY: I'm re-posting here something I wrote late last night, just to make sure plenty of people read it. What I found made my blood boil, and it should yours, too. How The Left Was Evil Tom Tomorrow, writing on the Enron Mess, concludes with: "Villainy, fraud, sex, death and a stonewalling White House. You think this thing is just going to blow over? Excuse me while I wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes." [Italics mine] Let's get this straight. Tom gets a good giggle -- no, a tear-inducing belly laugh -- out of what he thinks is a murder. Think I'm exaggerating? Read this snippet from the same post: "We've got at least one mysterious death--the apparent suicide of a former Enron executive who, from all reports, had nothing to hide, but was expected to be a major whistleblower in the case. " Yeah, Tom doesn't have the stones to come right out and say it, but he clearly implies murder, coroner's report to the contrary. And he thinks murder is pretty damn funny when it furthers his objective of embarrassing the President. Remember the video of Osama laughing at the deaths of 2,800 Americans when those deaths furthered his political objectives? Is his mindset really that different from Mr. Tomorrow's? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: As he does most every PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:36:53 AM ----- BODY: As he does most every week, excellent Washington reporting by Howard Fineman in Newsweek. What you get from Fineman that you won't from the New York Times is an honest look at the strengths and weaknesses of Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle. Fineman is what Washington correspondents should be, but rarely are. Also from DC, interesting Presidential polling data from Fox News/Opinion Dyamics. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: As he does most every PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:36:53 AM ----- BODY: As he does most every week, excellent Washington reporting by Howard Fineman in Newsweek. What you get from Fineman that you won't from the New York Times is an honest look at the strengths and weaknesses of Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle. Fineman is what Washington correspondents should be, but rarely are. Also from DC, interesting Presidential polling data from Fox News/Opinion Dyamics. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Momentum is building against Janet PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:49:51 AM ----- BODY: Momentum is building against Janet Reno's bid for the Democrat nomination for Florida governor. Reality is considered a major factor. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Evidence There Might Be a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 11:58:21 AM ----- BODY: Evidence There Might Be a God After All Department If Satan, sometimes known in His earthly disguise as "Walt Disney Co.," doesn't win a giant lawsuit with a little family, then His Unholy Eminence stands to lose 25% of His gross annual revenues. All of this over Winnie the Pooh. You go, Pooh-bear! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Random After Lunch Thought If PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 01:20:28 PM ----- BODY: Random After Lunch Thought If I want to get my picture up on Samizdata, do I have to show as much leg as Natalija? I mean, I just don't have the knees for that short a skirt. And it's gonna take at least three or four Mach 3 blades to hack through the foliage. But wait... maybe if I use one of those hidden-camera shots of the VodkaFiance... ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If you haven't already, click PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 01:39:22 PM ----- BODY: If you haven't already, click on over to Best of the Web. I'd missed Paul Krugman's latest idiocy this morning, mostly because I'd had some strong coffee very early, and so had gotten over my early-morning masochism. Anyway, scroll down today's Best to read this: "Former Enron adviser Paul Krugman has come completely unhinged: "I predict that in the years ahead Enron, not Sept. 11, will come to be seen as the greater turning point in U.S. society." This is the worst prediction we've heard since Sept. 12, when some guy said the previous day's atrocities would be off the front pages by Thanksgiving." Paul... if there's one thing I know, it's that you do not enjoy a lovely Vodka & Valium cocktail before you sit down to write. OK? Oh, and sorry, Mickey. But, really, everything else you do is just swell. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Promise to Make Some PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 01:57:18 PM ----- BODY: I Promise to Make Some Very Tasteless, Rather Funny Jokes After This Department Also on the NYT op-ed page, Nicholas D. Kristof has it all backwards on the Gitmo flap. His header says, "The Bush administration owes it to the world — and to our own national interest — to rise to the level of Somali gunfighters and apply the Geneva Convention to the men at Guantánamo Bay, Cuba." Nice idea, Nick, just not nice for the universe we actually live in. Somali warlords were (obviously) not signatories to the Geneva Conventions. Hell, Somalia isn't even a real nation-state. It's just a spot on the map where other countries aren't. However, it was most certainly in the warlord's best interest to act as though they were Geneva signatories when dealing with a captured US serviceman. Why? Because odds are we'd capture some of warlords or their officers, and they'd certainly appreciate some reciprocity in treatment. Do as you would be done by, and all that. What we have in Gitmo is quite the opposite. Here, the detainees are not signatories, nor are they going to suddenly get nice and act as though they are. So it is in our interest to demonstrate to them why it would be to their benefit to play by civilized rules. And the way to teach them that is to NOT give them Geneva Accord status. Maybe then they'll wise up. But then, if they were interested in playing by the rules of civilization, they wouldn't have started this war by flying civillian cruise missiles into office towers. Fuck'em. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Jokes Just Yet, Other PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 02:09:38 PM ----- BODY: No Jokes Just Yet, Other Than The NYT Op-Ed Page Yes, kids -- today the NYT Op-Ed hits a perfect Idiocy Trifecta. First Krugman, then Kristof, and now Shibley Telhami. In a bit called "The Need for Prudence in the Persian Gulf," Telhami writes: "...a reduction of American military forces in Saudi Arabia is politically inevitable. A drastic change like a complete withdrawal of forces is unlikely. But a force reduction is prudent as both nations assess their relations." The people in the Gulf needing to display some prudence are the three-timing, terrorist-funding, Quron-defiling House of Saud. How about we reduce their military presence and run the damn oil wells ourselves? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Still No Jokes. Need More PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 03:11:04 PM ----- BODY: Still No Jokes. Need More Coffee But until then, head on over to Sarge Stryker's for a serious no-shit-I-was-there sea story. Good reading, even if you aren't up on all the naval aviator slang. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Nick Gillespie, best known as PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 03:17:02 PM ----- BODY: Nick Gillespie, best known as The Guy Who Has Virginia Postrel's Old Gig, has a fun, funny, and informative interview with Paul Cantor over on ReasonOnline. In case you're out of the loop, Cantor is the author of Gilligan Unbound: Pop Culture in the Age of Globalization. As Dave Barry would say, I swear I'm not making this up. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This header (sans story) from PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 04:06:46 PM ----- BODY: This header (sans story) from Drudge: "Ashcroft has benign skin lesions removed from ear... " Doctors say strange "gray matter" from Ashcroft's skull is a mystery, but removal did the AG "no apparent harm." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also from Drudge, Fox News PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/29/2002 04:11:29 PM ----- BODY: Also from Drudge, Fox News Channel dethrones CNN in 24-hour cycle ratings. Hell, even that annoying Fox & Friends morning show ate CNN's breakfast. That zipper sound you hear this time is AOL Time Warner honcho Steve Case dropping trou and bending over. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Kids, I thank you for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 10:25:17 AM ----- BODY: Kids, I thank you for the big increase in traffic over the last couple weeks as I get my bearings and learn what I'm doing here. But just a quick couple items. First, this is a civilized blog. I'm rarely up before 9:30, and a decent respect for... well, just a bad pre-coffee attitude dictates I don't post before 10 or 10:30am. And that's Mountain Time. So mornings are a great time for you to catch up on yesterday's posts, but new pickings will be lean at best before noontime.. Second, I'm still not quite sure what this blog is. Partly political humor, part warblog, part news and blog links, part geopolitics, part bellowing rant. So tell me -- which part or parts do you like best? Do I lay off the jokes and do more analysis? Or the other way around? Are the rants too too too mean? Not enough links? Just a little direction here from you would be great -- I live to please my readers. Actually, I live to keep the VodkaFiance happy -- but I've got to do something while she's at work. Send your, uh, suggestive emails to stephenagreen-at-earthlink.net. You'll have to cut'n'paste and change the "-at-" to @, but you know why -- posting a real email address will lead to lots of spam. And we don't want that. OK, I'm gonna get back to the grind so you can have a steaming pile of fresh postings shortly. Meantime, tell me what you'd like to see. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And So It Begins Fortress PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 10:44:28 AM ----- BODY: And So It Begins Fortress Israel is one step closer to being... something. Maybe a big mistake. The Independent UK reports that PM Sharon has approved a plan to seal off Jerusalem in its entirety to outsiders, IE, Palestinians. Anyone who knows anything can tell you that if you defend everything everywhere at once, you defend nothing. But what other choice do they have? Even if they kill Arafat and destroy the PA, the Israelis are still vulnerable. Everywhere. So until the Palestinians are ready for peace -- and that's at least a generation from now -- the Israelis only have two real options, both unpalatable. The first is the total expulsion of Palestinians from the West Bank. That's the uberrightwing option -- the restoration of "Judea and Sumaria" to Israel proper. But the global outrage would be intolerable. Hell, even we couldn't back a move like that, not even after 9/11. Israel would become a pariah state locked so far out of world commerce as to make 1989 South Africa look coddled. And the increasingly high tech Israeli economy just can't afford that. The second option is called "Retreat and build a wall." Abandon the undefendable settlements, keep the strategic bits of the West Bank, and literally build a wall around the remainder. Far-fetched? Barely. It looks like they're ready to do that for Jerusalem -- which means they're one disco-bombing away from walling off the rest. And then Palestine can say goodbye to any hopes for peace (if they harbor any hopes of that), and also any hopes for anything other than grinding povery. PS I'd be writing about the State of the Union speech today, but: A) everyone else is, and; B) that's yesterday's news, damnit! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: OK, OK -- here's something PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 11:01:56 AM ----- BODY: OK, OK -- here's something about the State of the Union Address. The war will continue and the tax cuts won't be rescinded. So VodkaPundit declares it "a good speech." I'm sure I'll have some serious remarks on the SOTUA later, but meantime, check out ReasonOnline's (generic link) round-up of SOTUA punditry here (direct link). In a short space, they give you most everything. Andrew Sullivan linked me to the SOTUA Drinking Game. Click, print, and save it for next year. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Head over to Sarge Stryker's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 11:16:59 AM ----- BODY: Head over to Sarge Stryker's for more stuff like this bit o' peanut gallery commentary from last night: After a brief camera shot of Tom Ridge: “Who’s that?” “That’s Tom Ridge.” “What’s he do?” “Nothing as far as I can tell.” ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Holy Takedown, Batman! Will Vehrs PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 12:22:38 PM ----- BODY: Holy Takedown, Batman! Will Vehrs outdoes Sullivan in this vicious dissection of Paul "See No Evil Until After the Check Has Cleared" Krugman on today's PunditWatch. What is most vicious is Verhs just calmly, plainly makes the case without a trace of rancor. Wow. This is what blogging should be. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Finally, an Enron Joke Paul PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 12:45:12 PM ----- BODY: Finally, an Enron Joke Paul Krugman, aka Two Face, can be best described as two Germans. While taking money from Enron, he was Sergeant Shultz: "I know nussink! I see nussink!" And now that the NYT has forced him to stop whoring, Krugman has become Colonel Klink: "Hogan! I know you're up to somesink!" UPDATE: Saying "finally, an Enron joke," is a lot like saying, "At long last -- Ebola!" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This, courtesy of Best of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 01:22:43 PM ----- BODY: This, courtesy of Best of the Web: "The world will not accept U.S. hegemony," said Iranian foreign minister Kamal Kharrazi. Kharrazi then added, "And we're not going to accept gravity or this bad weather, either." Other reactions to the President's speech, also thanks to Best: Salim al-Qubaisi, a member of Iraq's "parliament," tells Reuters: "Little Bush's accusation against Iraq is baseless. . . . Such threats do not scare us." "In fact, we dare you to cross this line. No, this line. Oops, we meant THIS line." And from a "straight" North Korean newspaper story: "The U.S. loudmouthed 'threat' from the DPRK [Democratic People's Republic of Korea] is sophism intended to justify its military presence in South Korea and persistently pursue the policy of aggression against the DPRK." We can only hope! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Godfather Fans Will Understand, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 01:37:53 PM ----- BODY: You Godfather Fans Will Understand, Part I I won't bother linking to the story, since so many other bloggers already have. Oh, and I lost the link. But let's just say that Neil has become the Bush family's Fredo. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Godfather Fans Will Understand, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 01:46:36 PM ----- BODY: You Godfather Fans Will Understand, Part II If Fredo, er.. Neil Bush doesn't clean up his act, maybe W should have Dick Cheney take Neil fishing at some undisclosed location. Well, not while Barbara is still alive. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Godfather Fans Will Understand, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 01:49:20 PM ----- BODY: You Godfather Fans Will Understand, Part III All of this really happening wouldn't bother me, just so long as, when they make the movie version, the role of the Bush Twins isn't played by Sophia Coppola. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: One More Permalink KesherTalk is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 03:02:59 PM ----- BODY: One More Permalink KesherTalk is well worth my time, and should be worth yours, too. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Found Another Kesher showed PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 03:06:58 PM ----- BODY: Just Found Another Kesher showed me the way to Balloon Juice. More daily reading material, kids. Permalink left and down a ways. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: There Must Be Some Kind PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 03:13:31 PM ----- BODY: There Must Be Some Kind of Mistake Here Department We just got a hit from Berkeley. That's freakin' Berkeley, kids. Or as we call it in Colorado, Boulder del Mar. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Like You, Jonah, We PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 03:17:45 PM ----- BODY: We Like You, Jonah, We Just Don't Trust You More on why we don't trust Mr. Goldberg, from the man himself: I will take free money from just about anybody. I'll take money from NARAL, PETA, the Libertarian party, the Communist party (I hear they share offices). Jonah, if you can't tell the difference between very limited Constitutional government -- that's small-L libertarian -- and totalitarian thugocracy -- that's communism -- then we're going to have to send you to Remedial Punditry 101. Some people's kids just can't be trusted. UPDATE: But here's why we will always like Jonah -- he writes sentences like this: "Paul Krugman has been an arrogantly hysterical crapweasel." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Maybe He Started Drinking Ealry PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 03:50:53 PM ----- BODY: Maybe He Started Drinking Ealry Department Kind thanks to Ain't No Bad Dude for a swell mention. A good guy, even if he don't like nobody. And funnier than me, that's for sure. New Permalink in the usual place alongside the usual suspects. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Can We Give Them Back PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 04:09:41 PM ----- BODY: Can We Give Them Back Egypt, Too? Read this Barbara Lerner piece from today's National Review Online. It's great support for the idea first promulgated (I think) by Glenn Reynolds to return all of Arabia back to the Turks. Well-reasoned, and well-written with a you-are-there immediacy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: OK, kids, I'll beat this PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 06:44:30 PM ----- BODY: OK, kids, I'll beat this horse just one more time today, and then you're off the hook. First, I'd like to reiterate my thanks for the traffic explosion last week and especially in the last few days. I'm seeing lots of repeat customers, which tells me I might just be doing something right. And the emails have been fantastic. But... VodkaPundit is only three weeks old, and I'm still feeling my way around. What is it you'd like to see more of? Less of? What am I not doing that I should? And to answer one reader's suggestion -- no, I will not post any naked pictures of the VodkaFiance. Not without first seeing some serious cash. C'mon, you know you wanna, I'll even make it easy. For a short time only, a real email link. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Conspiracy Theory Department The Associated PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 07:16:42 PM ----- BODY: Conspiracy Theory Department The Associated Press reports that the kidnappers of reporter Daniel Pearl are now threatening to kill him tomorrow if their demands aren't met. Could this be some sort of left wing plot to gain back some sympathy for the press? Nope -- Pearl works for the Wall Street Journal. I know I shouldn't joke about Mr. Pearl's plight. But the whole situation is so awful that if I don't joke, then I'm going to cry. A good American, a member in good standing of the Fourth Estate, doing his noble job -- this man is taken captive by barbarians who think nothing of his life, or any individual life. While we, we who think so much of life that we make conditions nice, even for captured terrorists who plotted to kill our wives and children, we can do little or nothing to help Daniel Pearl. Pearl's job is to bring truth to his readers. The barbarian's job is to plunge the world into darkness. If we give in to the barbarian's demands, then a thousand Americans will be held at gunpoint tomorrow. So we sit and we wait and we hope to develop enough intelligence to rescue Pearl before his captors decide he serves their plans better as a corpse. I do not beleive in God. I do not pray. But my thoughts tonight are somewhere in Pakistan with Daniel Pearl. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Few Words on Language PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 07:58:28 PM ----- BODY: A Few Words on Language The words we use are important. Vocabulary adds context for the listener. That's why I was so struck when President Bush used the phrase "the civilized world" last night. Those three simple words imply so much about a worldview that I thought was largely forgotten. I won't bother trying to explain it -- you either already know and agree or disagree, or you're too out of it for me to bother playing teacher. That's why in my last post, I used the word "barbarians" to describe the captors of Daniel Pearl. And I'm going to use that word from now on to describe terrorists and terrorism. You see, those barbarians don't deserve the stature granted them by being thought of as "-ists" who believe in an "-ism." They are barbarians, something out of a dark past century, armed with modern conveniences and weapons. But don't let the veneer of cell phones, web addresses, or electronic detonators fool you; they are no more civilized than a wild proto-man of pre-history who has just learned to bash his neighbor with a stick. They want to destroy civilization, they want to turn back the clock. Don't let them even slow the clock down, don't grant them a title they don't deserve. I've been far too serious tonight. I promise to get back to being flippant and useless tomorrow. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call -- Final Post PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/30/2002 11:39:16 PM ----- BODY: Last Call -- Final Post for the Night At 11,700 years, an "unassuming bush may be world's oldest living thing." Helen Thomas lodges formal protest, claims "at least eight days seniority." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: First Word -- the Coffee PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 10:12:14 AM ----- BODY: First Word -- the Coffee Hasn't Kicked In Yet We'll get to the emails from yesterday and this morning in a bit. Probably not til this afternoon. In the meantime, this: Is the VodkaPundit psychic? You be the judge. Just yesterday I called Neil "the Bush family's Fredo," then went on to cast W in the Michael Corleone role. And now US News & World report has this header -- "Bush should hire the mob." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And It's a Long Way PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 10:22:17 AM ----- BODY: And It's a Long Way Down from There, Too I lost the origial link, but Janet Reno collapsed last night, but is doing fine now, according to the latest story. Normally I would make a physical-collapse-as-campaign-chances metaphor here, but I used up my weekly quota with the three-part Godfather joke yesterday ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Does She Get Fries PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 10:25:33 AM ----- BODY: But Does She Get Fries with that Shake? Also from the Janet Reno story in the Washington Post, "[Dr.] Whitsell could not say whether the fainting spell was related to the former attorney general's Parkinson's disease, but dizziness, poor balance and trembling are some of the symptoms of the disease." Whitsell went on to add, "Other symptoms include burning cultists alive and stealing motherless children at gunpoint so that they might go live in a totalitarian dictatorship." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'd Hate to See His PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 10:37:18 AM ----- BODY: I'd Hate to See His Underwear from Tuesday Night In a move puzzling even to Iranians, Iran's Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei said he is "honored" to be targeted as a terrorist by the "Great Satan." Said one man-on-the-Tehran-street, "It's like Khamenei has some sort of death wish. Or maybe he's just got a really nice cave, like that Oswald or Osman guy or whatever his name was." "There are some satans in the world, but America indeed is the great Satan," Khamenei said, flames spewing out his ears and trying to hide his cloven hooves in oversized Gucci loafers. So kids, who wants to bet VodkaPundit one Absolut Citron Martini that we're busy programing cruise missiles at government targets in Tehren right now? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's Mr. Baby-Killer to You! PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 10:47:21 AM ----- BODY: That's Mr. Baby-Killer to You! Austin Bay, a brilliant man with whom I don't often disagree, gets it close but not quite about the Gitmo detainees. Austin, this is a fight to the death, not about the moral high ground. We got that on 9/11. We'd be within our treaty rights to shoot any al Qaeda officer on sight. That they're getting much better than that is a tribue already to our largesse. Granting them POW status is an honor they do not deserve. Scroll down to see my post on language from last night. It's civilization vs. barbarians, and barbarians cannot be POWs. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Like Being A Little PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 11:19:15 AM ----- BODY: It's Like Being A Little Bit Pregnent Bill Safire's NYT column today is even better than usual -- and that's saying something. As he explains the Bush's call to go after terror-sponsors North Korea, Iran, and Iraq, something hit me: the importance of finishing wars. And I'm not talking just about the Current Mess. 1953. Korea. Stalemate. Now North Korea is building nuclear weapons and the long-range missiles to deliver them. If we wait too long to act, then replacing the evil North Korean government could cost us Pearl Harbor. Or Los Angeles. 1979. Iran. Desert One fails. The new Iranian theocracy learns the US can be triffled with. We never teach them any better. Result? Iran is working on WMD and missiles, too. Teaching them otherwise now could cost us Haifa or Tel Aviv. 1991. Iraq. We let Saddam stay in power. And now Saddam supports terror worldwide, including al Qaeda. Might have had a part in both WTC attacks. Only reason we think he doesn't have nukes is ten years of trade sanctions -- sanctions which have ruined our moral authority in the Middle East. In all three cases, we put off "finishing" the war because it seemed too expensive. In Korea we worried about starting WWIII. In Iran, we feared Soviet intervention, too. In Iraq, we feared taking Bagdhad would lead to a lengthy occupation and Marshall Plan. Well, now we know -- acting later is always more expensive than acting now. Compound interest collects on unfinished wars, too. Thankfully, I think the current President understands that. More thankfully, I think the American people understand it now, too. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Which Little Knobby Thing Makes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 11:49:43 AM ----- BODY: Which Little Knobby Thing Makes the Wheels Come Out? In an NYT op-ed but today, Alice Amsden asks, "Why Are Globalizers So Provincial?" She complains that the US appoints the head of the World Bank, and that the modern, Western countries control the IMF and the WTO. Let me tell Ms. Amsden something -- no one wants to fly in a plane piloted by the passengers. We control these things because we're the ones who can and do make trade work. Put Communist party hacks in charge of a global bank? A tribal leader from a land where the laws of cause and effect are seen as prosaic leading the IMF? The Butcher of Bagdhad working for a level playing field? This college drop-out expects something a bit smarter from an MIT prof like Amsden. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Should Hear What He PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 12:03:54 PM ----- BODY: You Should Hear What He Says About People He Doesn't Like Yesterday, Jonah Goldberg at NRO wrote a line that's become my new chant. So, just because it feels so good, I want you to say it clearly, but not too loudly, right there at your desk at work, the internet cafe, or wherever you are. Ready? Here we go: "Paul Krugman has been an arrogantly hysterical crapweasel." Who cares if people are staring at you. Didn't that feel good? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If I Were Gay, I'd PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 12:30:39 PM ----- BODY: If I Were Gay, I'd Kiss Him Right on the Mouth Hell, I still might. Read this from Andrew Sullivan today: "I have long found Paul Krugman an insufferably pompous, shrill, Bush-bashing pseudo-populist." Doesn't quite have the flow of Goldberg's "crapweasel," but it certainly proves that despite their best efforts, English universities still produce some goddamn fine writers. Thanks, Andrew! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also, The Dog Ate His PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 12:45:33 PM ----- BODY: Also, The Dog Ate His Homework Forgive the large -- even for me -- number of typos today. All this week and next, I'm posting during daylight hours from a special location. A location armed with an early Pentium-era computer with no Word, no Excel, no SpellCheck, no nothin'. Oh, and a tiny little keyboard that reminds me of the one from the IBM PCjr. And a 13-inch monitor. And did I mention only a slowband AOL connection to the web? The fact that I'm still posting 1,000-2,000 words a day is proof enough I love this gig and care deeply about my readers. So forgive the typos already! I fix'em as soon as I find'em. UPDATE: Did I mention Explorer has crashed on me three times already today, each time requiring a reboot? Did I also mention that connecting to AOL with this P.O.S. takes, on average, four attempts and three minutes? Did I mention I'm not getting freakin' PAID for any of this? And now I have to somehow get myself back in the right mood to say lovely things about Peggy Noonan. FURTHER UPDATE: How old do I feel, mentioning the IBM PCjr? If someone else remembers that Thing, please let me know. Otherwise, I'm going to go to a mirror with a magnifying glass and start pulling gray hairs. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How does one get de-(un-?)listed PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 01:09:51 PM ----- BODY: How does one get de-(un-?)listed from Google? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Look Good, But They PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 01:41:37 PM ----- BODY: They Look Good, But They Never Feel Right Some surprises from the al Qaeda documents recovered by our soldiers in Afghanistan. I've excerpted the most important bits for you and collected them here. "Documents...spotlight the U.S. Capitol, Seattle's Space Needle and a portion of Los Angeles," suggesting them as targets. This is further proof that the barbarians just don't understand America. Let the Greens in Seattle run the show there for a while, and there won't be any buildings over two stories left. And all built of adobe. Also found were references to al Qaeda's "Crack Suicide Squad." I... I have nothing to add here that the Monty Python troupe didn't do twenty years ago. I am filled with shame. No, wait -- giggles. Most interesting to Army Intelligence officers were minutes taken from actual al Qaeda meetings. Translations differ, but the consensus goes as follows: Osama: I swear to Allah, Britney Spears had a boob job. Omar: No, you're thinking of that Christina girl. I hear she can be a real bitch. Osama: You fool -- look right here! And take off that fake eyepatch, you'll never be butch. Anyway, I'd know her face from six miles up. Think I impressed her with that whole airplane thing? Will she answer my letters now? More details to follow. Developing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Doesn't Sullivan Have an Award PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 02:00:45 PM ----- BODY: Doesn't Sullivan Have an Award for This Sort of Thing? Interesting but not convincing stuff from Derbyshire today. He argues that Israel will eventually be swallowed up by the Arabs for the same reason he thinks Northern Ireland will be incorporated into Ireland Proper -- "democracy is no match for terrorism." Oh really, John? I, too, am a pessimist on Israel's long-term chances -- but only because not even SDI can defend again a suitcase nuke. And the barbarians only have to get lucky once to flatten Tel Aviv. But saying we're no match for terrorism, just two nights after Bush's SOTUA, just four months into this campaign, just weeks into the government we installed in Afghanistan... well. I wonder if after Pearl harbor in 1941 and Kasserine Pass not much later, Derbyshire would have argued that "democracy is no match for fascism." Or after Task Force Smith that "democracy is no match for Communism." Blair caved into the IRA. Israel damned near caved into the PLO in 1999, and was saved only by Arafat's ill-timed intransigence. But as a Brit -- whose George III caved into certain rabble after Yorktown -- Derbyshire underestimates his American cousins yet again. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Who Let the Dogs... Oh, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 02:26:50 PM ----- BODY: Who Let the Dogs... Oh, Hell, Not Even I Can Say It. A pack of wild dogs mauled a little boy to death in Norway yesterday. "Should this happen several more times," said a Norwegian government official who preferred to remain anonymous, "then we will be forced to raise our voice when we say 'bad doggies,' and maybe even send a note to Brussels." The official concluded with, "I'd rather you didn't use my name, since taking such a strong stance is frowned on by the PM." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Didn't Pick Out a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 02:34:09 PM ----- BODY: They Didn't Pick Out a Name After the Ultrasound? I don't remember who to thank for sending me the link to this Jeff Jacoby column, but you really ought to read it. Read it very closely if you live in Arabia, and even more closely if there's a "Saud" in your name. Hashemite Arabia? Kemalite Arabia? Far East Texas Arabia? Pick one -- any would be an improvement over "Saudi." FULL DISCLOSURE: It saddens me to say such things about the Saudi government. My father-in-law-to-be has a long-standing business relationship with the Saudi government, and formerly a military one. Through him, I've heard many good things about a certain Saudi prince, and many very frustrating things about dealing with others. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Usually, They Just Think I'm PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 02:40:31 PM ----- BODY: Usually, They Just Think I'm a Perv Hello to whichever lovely lady at Bryn Mawr is reading my blog today. Sadly, VodkaPundit had to give up hitting on college girls even before proposing to the VodkaFiance. Yet life after 30 is still pretty damn good. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And They Want the Burger PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 03:10:34 PM ----- BODY: And They Want the Burger King to Abdicate in Favor of a Semi-Autonomous Collective You simply must read Dreher's column today on the "protestors" in New York, if only for this line: "If Genoa, Seattle, and Melbourne are any guide, urban terrorists gathering in New York this week are going to burn khakis, upend four-dollar frappucinos, and assassinate Mayor McCheese." Back to Monty Python for a moment, if we may. These anti-globalization barbarians remind me of John Cleese in the Argument Sketch. Remember it? No matter what Eric Idle says, Cleese just replies, "No it isn't." Well, except when Idle says "No it isn't," and Cleese says "Yes it is." Same with the anti-everything barbarians currently camping out in NYC. Show them anything truly progressive (as in PROGRESS) or beneficial or promoting freedom or commerce -- and they automatically gainsay it without a thought. More on this later. I feel I'm developing a new theme. So now I'm actually going to have to put on my thinking cap. Which, like the Grinch's heart, is two sizes too small. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Stop That, Or I'll Tell PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 03:15:58 PM ----- BODY: Stop That, Or I'll Tell Teacher Great find by Sean McCray over at Next Right. Read it -- could be a sneaky, underhanded, outside-the-law, and absolutely wonderful method of education reform. Not only that, but it's happening in my old home town. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: At Least He Doesn't Forget PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 03:27:57 PM ----- BODY: At Least He Doesn't Forget to Put the Toilet Seat Down My apologies to Rand Simberg, the guy we all need to thank for creating Transterrestrial Musings. I meant to permalink his way ever ago, but it somehow got lost in the shuffle. He does great work and you really ought to make his place a daily visit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But He Still Doesn't Do PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 03:57:10 PM ----- BODY: But He Still Doesn't Do Windows Glenn Reynolds has been out all afternoon, Andrew Sullivan's site is down or hacked or something bad. I refuse to read NRO's "The Corner" (or link to it) until Jonah admits he's running a blog. What I'm trying to say here is I'd better pick up the pace to take up the slack. Oh, and I'd also better link to Little Green Footballs like I promised myself I'd do the same day I promised to link Transterrestrial. Meantime, it's a slow afternoon for news. So what's a blogger to do other than update his links? UPDATE: VodkaPundit, in all his three weeks of amateur web glory, just placed himself in the same league as Sullivan and Reynolds. Arrogant little prick, isn't he? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Down Underhanded The Aussies, like PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 04:24:02 PM ----- BODY: Down Underhanded The Aussies, like the Brits, have a ruling class far worse than they deserve. In a new act of cowardice, the Australian Parliament has banned the Dalai Lama from speaking inside their chamber. I'm no Richard Gere dreamy-land idiot. I know Tibet is most likely doomed. But -- to cave into Chinese Communist Party demands to delegitimize a religious and spiritual leader is cowardice at its worst. (OK, second worst. Worst would be if on 9/12, Bush had said, "Sorry, what did we do to make you hate us?") Aussies, tell your Parliament to go to hell. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Swear to God I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 06:07:34 PM ----- BODY: I Swear to God I Watch It Because of Karen's Chest Don't expect much posting tonight, kids. Or half of all the other Thursday nights. I'm a self-confessed junky of the Jack & Karen Show, and wouldn't dream of missing a fresh episode. Certainly not during February sweeps. I hear this time, Grace might actually catch herself a man. And who knows, Will might, too. If I could, I'd dictate witty commentary during commercials for my VodkaFlunky to post for me, but this is strictly a low-budget operation. Well, other than the bar tab. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And He Didn't Even Look PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 06:13:12 PM ----- BODY: And He Didn't Even Look Up Her Picture This Time A fantastic angry posting from the lovely and talented Natalija Radic on Samizdata tonight. She tears into the throats of the Eurosocialists who run the show over on the other side of the pond. Natalija, if I might suggest something to you? Try taking on the barbarian "protesters" in New York next time you post. They really need to hear from someone who lives in a country victim to their wishes. I don't expect it to do any actual good, but I do expect you to write something pretty damn fun to read. Also, something tells me it'll have that Brick to the Face effect you can have when you're angry. Go for it! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We'll Get Back to Being PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 06:23:41 PM ----- BODY: We'll Get Back to Being Vicious After These Important Messages. One more thing before I sink into TV Mode for a bit. My call for advice and direction yesterday resulted in a flood of emails. I'd like to thank each of you, and I think I managed to reply to all personally. If I didn't, that's my bad and so I'm thanking you here. The consensus seems to be to keep doing what I'm doing, only more of it. Kids, all I can do is try. I'm not sure I can pound out any more words each day than I already do, but... hell, it's not like I've got a wedding and honeymoon and all that to help plan. Oh, wait... And no, Phil, I will still not be publishing any naked pictures of the VodkaFiance. Get your own. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Does This Mean I Have PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 01/31/2002 06:39:38 PM ----- BODY: Does This Mean I Have to Organize My Dry Bar by Dewey Decimal? An email exchange with a good friend resulted in the question, "You're a Scotch drinker, so why 'VodkaPundit'?" Simple. Just like pairing food with booze, different kinds of writing call for different drinks. Punditry goes with vodka, natch. Writing fiction calls for a good single-malt Scotch, preferably Oban or Dalwhinnie If you're working on a limerick, you'll want a beer. Or three. And definately Guiness. Research paper? You're a student and can't afford to drink. Legal briefs are best served with a gin martini, unless you're a Bahamian bank lawyer, in which case a gin and tonic with a squeeze. Trying to finish that epic poem? Mead, baby, mead! Writers of football team names on their chests should stick with Bud. And finally, there's High Verse. Demerol, cocaine, and jug wine all at once. (Dorothy Parker only) We'll be taking further suggestions to add to this list right up until last call. Seriously. After that, I'm now considering changing my slogan to "The Somellier of Punditry." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But a Whoppee Cushion Is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 10:22:25 AM ----- BODY: But a Whoppee Cushion Is Probably Going Too Far Alert Reader Russell Leslie from Australia sends the following about my rant against the Aussie Parliament yesterday: The story is different than you seem to think. Parliament House has a lot of meeting areas, some of which are quite big. Some of the meeting areas can be hired for private functions. Canberra has some very huge venues, a lot small venues but not many medium venues. The Dalai Lama's visit will be popular so the National Press Club decided that their own venue was too small and wanted to use one of the bigger function rooms at Parliament House. A plain-old commercial transaction - not like addressing Congress or anything - more like hiring a meeting room at the Capitol Building. That is where "international protocol" comes into this. The Dalai Lama is, at least notionally, a Head of State. Protocol for meeting a Head of State, travelling as Head of State has many pitfalls and rules. If he(she) is not afforded certain courtesies we are disparaging his(her) claims as Head of State - if we extend him(her) ANY of the courtesies we have to extend them all or we are insulting the State of which he(she) is head. The Dalai Lama is visiting Australia as a private individual. Australia would prefer not do anything to make the status of the visit ambiguous. Having him address a crowd, which will include many of our members of Cabinet, in Parliament House is one of those things that could make the status of the visit ambiguous. The problem would be as much the risk of disparaging the concept of Tibet as it would be a risk of offending China. Russell, you make valid and compelling points -- right up until the last one. Risk offending China? Oh my! Good sir, the noses of tyrants are made for tweaking. And their toes are designed for stepping on. I grant you the rest, but on this I must stand firm. Otherwise, we'd still have the Queen on our money. (Sorry, was that unfair?) ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Insomniacs Will Rest Easier PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 10:36:56 AM ----- BODY: You Insomniacs Will Rest Easier Found this one on Drudge -- Amtrack is threatening to discontinue service. In a related story, Michael Jackson threatens to stop producing new albums. You can get an endless series of jokes here: Congressman [Any Name] threatens to stop making speeches. Al Gore threatens to use fewer big words. Iraq threatens to invade Texas. Britney Spears threatens to dress all trampy and stuff. VodkaFiance threatens VodkaPundit with lots of hot & steamy Friday night sex. (OK, so that one happened. You ought to see my other emails.) John Tesh threatens to fade silently away. Got more? Send'em in. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Does It Surprise You He's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 10:43:53 AM ----- BODY: Does It Surprise You He's Marrying a Military Brat? Read Krauthammer. Don't wait, just click. Now. You can always come back when you're done. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Did He Ever Do PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 10:53:24 AM ----- BODY: But Did He Ever Do Any Work for the Saudis? Paul Krugman (I won't insult you by linking) claims there may be "two, three, many," more Enrons in the near future. Comrade K goes on to say that he doesn't know which companies, he's just sure there will be some. I've got an idea for how to spot future Enrons: Look for huge companies who once hired Krugman to flak for them. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Reminiscing Terry Anderson has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 11:02:18 AM ----- BODY: Just Reminiscing Terry Anderson has a thoughtful piece in the NYT on Daniel Pearl and his kidnappers. In case you don't remember, Anderson was one of those souls held forever and ever by barbarians in Lebanon back in the '80s and early '90s. Three careers and ten years ago, I got to talk briefly with Anderson when he came to speak at Humboldt State University which, if I remember correctly, is his alma mater. I doubt he remembers one then-ponytailed would-be radio journalist, but I remember the quiet power of his soft-spoken words. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Do You Drink Cooking PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 11:17:00 AM ----- BODY: But Do You Drink Cooking Sherry When Writing About Julia Childs? Sheryl K writes in with this suggestion for the writing/drink pairing list from last night (scroll down to see the whole thing): "Mystery writing and sherry go great together." I think we may have out next Agatha Christie. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Victor Davis Hanson might just PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 11:25:46 AM ----- BODY: Victor Davis Hanson might just be the best writer at NRO, and certainly the best on the web for military affairs -- even if his last book was unconvincing. Check out this line: "The main tenet of multiculturalism — that there is no absolute standard for measuring the respective worth of any given culture — has been shattered by 9/11." Yes, Virginia, there is a good and an evil. And part of evil is being unwilling to see the difference. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Daniel Pearl may have been PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 11:57:04 AM ----- BODY: Daniel Pearl may have been killed in the last hour by his barbarian captors. If true, he is a casualty in this war and should be remembered as such. However, I hope this news proves to be untrue. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: At Least There Are No PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 12:10:35 PM ----- BODY: At Least There Are No Jokes About Warren Christopher Wearing a Halston Dress Former Secretary of State Madeline "This ATM Machine Line is Another Munich!" Albright today criticized President Bush's foreign policy. She was at her most critital on Bush's lumping together of Iran, Iraq, and North Korea as terror-supporting states. "That's like saying bacon and eggs go together, or lumping together the Superbowl with football. Which, by the way, the Patriots will win in a blow-out. 106-3, probably." Albright when on to explain that "the situation in Iran is much more complicated." So much so, that she strained to come up with yet another Munich analogy. "If we encourage the people of Iran to rise up against their government, that would be like... um... giving Prague to Hitler. Somehow." The former SecState, wearing a slinky little Chanel number, urged Bush to turn Gitmo into a real-life "Real World," and release videotape of the detainees there because, "the international community thinks we have lost our minds." However, Albright was unclear whether she was referring to the country as a whole or to herself. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Ask What He'll Post PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 12:27:19 PM ----- BODY: Don't Ask What He'll Post Pictures of If He Keeps Getting Hits from Bryn Mawr If I keep getting hits from the Department of Justice, I'm going to post a picture of a giant aluminum boob. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just When I Think I'm PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 12:34:33 PM ----- BODY: Just When I Think I'm Clever Will Warren trumps me again with "Oops! It's the Euro." However, I'm still waiting for Will (or Dan or Steve at Happy Fun Pundit) to make a song out of "At Long Last Ebola." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Just When I Think PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 12:40:25 PM ----- BODY: And Just When I Think I Can Turn a Phrase Sarge Stryker comes up with this gem: "Spring was sputtering in like a 15 year old learning how to drive a stick-shift." Correction, Sarge -- I was 14 when Uncle Bill tried to teach me how to drive that ancient I.H. Scout II. Read the whole post. Sarge S has already become the web's best source for military tall tales. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: North Korean Army Marches South, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 01:27:54 PM ----- BODY: North Korean Army Marches South, Seeking 7-11 that Takes Checks or at Least Some Wild Berries The North Korean government condemned what it called the "moral leprosy" of US President George W. Bush and said the communist state was powerfully equipped for any conflict. The North Korean arsenal includes over 2,500 Soviet- and Chinese-built tanks, and nearly enough fuel to fill up the Jeep. Speaking from atop a pile of corpses of low-level aides who had recently died of starvation, a Pyongyang foreign ministry spokesman said: "We are sharply watching the disturbing moves of the United States that has pushed the situation to the brink of war." A war, he went on to say, "that we are bound to lose in an embarassingly spectacular fasion." Glancing up from his prepared note, the spokesman asked, "running dog-capitalist pig-tool reporter, are you going to finish that sandwich?" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Goldberg Sticks It Halfway In, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 01:39:57 PM ----- BODY: Goldberg Sticks It Halfway In, Claims Orgy. Almost admitting that he runs a blog with NRO's "The Corner," Jonah Goldberg writes the following: There are no editors, no rules, and no master plan. Yes, as many, many, many readers have pointed out, it's very much like a blog along the lines of AndrewSullivan.com or Instapundit.com. The difference, however, is significant. Those guys run one-man operations. If you can't see the distinction, look at it this way. Sex with one person is very different than sex with more than one. Has he never heard of the multi-poster, multi-damn-national Libertarian Samizdata? Of course he hasn't. Jonah saw the word "Libertarian" and closed the browser window, not wanting to read "Marxist tripe." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: At Least Shannon Doherty Admits PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 01:53:19 PM ----- BODY: At Least Shannon Doherty Admits She's a Bitch Alleged actress and shoplifter Wynona Ryder has been charged with four felonies today in a Beverly Hills Court. Ryder's lawyer protested, saying "being stuck in 1989 is no crime." But pressed on another charge, her attorney claimed "no comment" to his client still finding former "Heathers" co-star Christian Slater "boyishly cute." Ryder has already pleaded no contest to charges of staring in "Autumn in New York." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Not a Real Drink, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 02:03:25 PM ----- BODY: It's Not a Real Drink, He Still Has to Drive Home It's taken most of the day, but I'm finally getting all caught up with Douglas Turnbull's excellent "The Beauty of Gray" blog. Like the Good Captain Steve of the USS Clueless, Douglas has a way of making me feel dull-witted and uninformed. That's a compliment, kids, not a complaint. A well-earned raised martini glass and a permalink for "The Beauty of Gray." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If You Thought Krauthammer Was PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 02:19:25 PM ----- BODY: If You Thought Krauthammer Was on His Game Today Simply one of the two finest patriotic tributes I have read over at USS Clueless. Wow. Best part is, I don't even think that's what he was aiming for. Double wow. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And They Agreed On Something PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 03:24:17 PM ----- BODY: And They Agreed On Something Other Than Hitchens Being Snooty Andrew Sullivan is up from his nap and back to posting. I'm sorry I had to miss his appearence with Christopher Hitchens this morning on C-SPAN. Anyone tape it? Please? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How Can Pat Buchanan Think PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 03:58:23 PM ----- BODY: How Can Pat Buchanan Think Being White Is So Great When He's So Stupid? I just sent the following letter to Glenn Reynolds. He did a write-up of Jonah Goldberg's rerun today that reminded me of a story from the Iowa Caucases (of all places) six years ago. Prof, Your bit on that story reminded me of an old Bob Dornan press meeting back in '96. If you'll remember, B-1 Bob ran for the Republican nomination not to win (so he claimed) but so that there would be at least one candidate picking on Clinton at any given moment. Occasionally, the press treated him like they did John McCain in 2000, and for the same reason. Dornan was candid, funny, and would answer (or say) most anything. Well, he had a group of them eating out of his hand on C-SPAN when a question came up about... oh, abortion or someting. Doesn't matter. Dornan started talking about his grandchildren -- all 942 of them, I think. A lot. "Good Irish-Catholic kids, all of them, and they look it" he said. He then went on to say, "Now, in a thousand years or so, our kids will all be the same nice bronze color." And he meant it as a good thing. Compare that with Pat Buchanan's latest tripe about our "racial future." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't They Always Seem Smart PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 05:50:18 PM ----- BODY: Don't They Always Seem Smart When They Agree With You? Yesterday I wrote: In all three cases, we put off "finishing" the war because it seemed too expensive. In Korea we worried about starting WWIII. In Iran, we feared Soviet intervention, too. In Iraq, we feared taking Bagdhad would lead to a lengthy occupation and Marshall Plan. Well, now we know -- acting later is always more expensive than acting now. Compound interest collects on unfinished wars, too. And now this just in from Smart Reader Brenda Largent: Here's a free lesson from a programmer: Fixing a programming error after software release: Approximately 10x the cost and time of fixing it before release. ALWAYS finish the job. It's waaaaay expensive to go back and do it all again. This is true of every endeavor in life. Remember the old carpentry saying 'Measure twice, cut once.' Amen, Brenda. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Most of it Already PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 06:16:54 PM ----- BODY: But Most of it Already is Rubble As I'm sure you've read by now, al Qaeda is considering moving their base of operations to Lebanan. Leave aside the poor Lebanese, who have been through far more hell the last 27 years than any people deserve, with the possible exception of French Canadians. The important question is, what the hell is supposed criminal genius Osama bin Laden THINKING? We've just demonstrated that we can kick his ass in landlocked, inaccessable, no-real-roads Afghanistan. A place far from any of our forward bases, a place where even carrier aircraft had to stretch to reach. So you would think his next stop would be somewhere even more remote. Say, the Brazilian rainforest, or Papua New Guinea, or in orbit around Zoltram VII. Instead, he wants to park himself in Lebanon. A quick look at the map tells us: A) Lebanon is within launching distance of most every military asset we have, and; B) It's right the hell next door to Israel, a country which -- without out help! -- owned the suburbs of Beirut as recently as 1982. Osama bin Laden is no criminal mastermind. He's a barbarian who got lucky. UPDATE! MORE JOKES! Did Osama get a sweet deal on office space in downtown Beirut? Perhaps Arafat (or Assad Jr, or Khadaffi) suggested the move, so he'd no longer be the biggest bastard on the Mediterranean? What, Libya was full? I could go on, but fishbarrelling gets old. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: For Lunch We Had Cheez-Its PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 06:30:51 PM ----- BODY: For Lunch We Had Cheez-Its Sometimes I wonder how I got someone as wonderful and beautiful as the VodkaFiance to agree to marry me. Then, going over our emails today, I got the answer: It's the cooking, stupid. Tomorrow night we're sharing cooking duties. She's got the appetizer, veggies, and dessert. I'm in charge of salad, entree, and starch. Here's my half of the menu: Salad -- Steve's World's Best Caesar Starch -- Rosemary mashed potatoes Entree -- Steak Diane Also, I've picked a lovely '97 Freemark Abbey Cabernet Sauvignon to go with the meal. Yes, you are allowed to hate us both. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Yet He Never Calls PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 06:43:55 PM ----- BODY: And Yet He Never Calls Me the Next Day Sarge Stryker has a good look at the Pentagon procurement process. In this case, "process" is synonymous with "mess" or perhaps "criminal insanity." But you knew that already. Anyway, here's the link, even though I seem to link Stryker once or twice every afternoon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And No Tartar Build-Up There, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 07:02:25 PM ----- BODY: And No Tartar Build-Up There, Either One of my favorite recent discoveries, Little Green Footballs, quotes at length a Weekly Standard story where we learn, among other things, that some Gitmo detainees have put toothpaste up their bottoms. At least their backsides are minty fresh, I suppose. As Dave Barry says, I swear I'm not making this up. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Still No Carson You PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 07:11:06 PM ----- BODY: He's Still No Carson You gotta love Letterman. VodkaPundit started watching him at the tender age of 13, when he got his first late night gig over at NBC. You can find his Top Ten list from last night here, but you might not know about the Top Ten Extra. If you go to the web site, you can see extra items left off the list. Here I present last night's extra from Top Ten Reasons I Love America: Free refills It's got the greatest Navy in the world! Thanks to our nation's radio stations, while the rest of the world has "October," we have "Rocktober" Every year an American team wins the Super Bowl Hardly anyone speaks Swedish, which is good because I don't understand Swedish The St. Louis Arch makes a convenient carrying handle for the whole continent Other countries may have cheese -- we have Cheese Whiz American know-how lets me shampoo and condition at the same time OK, Letterman -- now go take CBS for all they're worth in your contract negotiations. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Yeah, But How Much Do PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 07:14:25 PM ----- BODY: Yeah, But How Much Do The Sticks Sell For? An item from Strategy Page just caught my eye: "Israel has exercised its contract option to buy another 52 F-16I tactical fighters." In a related development, Yassar Arafat's Palestinian Authority has contracted with Ur Defense Conglomerate for three extra truckloads of Mark IV Throwable Rocks. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Or Else the VodkaFiance Will PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 08:49:48 PM ----- BODY: Or Else the VodkaFiance Will Kill Him Kids, it's getting towards dinner hour here, and I've got some veal to picatta. So if you don't mind, I'm going to go have a weekend now. I might find some time to post during the weekend, but mostly I'll be weekending. Sunday night, however, I'll be working on adding an archive to this joint, along with a requested "Greatest Hits" section. Look for the new features Monday at the earliest, and, at the very latest, July 2004. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Thought Paul Was the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 09:24:07 PM ----- BODY: I Thought Paul Was the Cute One and Ringo Was the Funny One Forgive me for posting late, but the VodkaFiance hasn't arrived yet so I have some time to kill. You absolutely have to click over to Happy Fun Pundit and scroll down to Dan's Democratic Response Q&A. I laughed so hard that milk came out of my nose, and I haven't had milk in days. Also, the Q&A post confirms my suspicion that of Dan & Steve there, Dan is the funnier one. Not that I'm trying to sow any discord over at their site so long as they keep not linking me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And If He's Right? I'm PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/01/2002 09:58:38 PM ----- BODY: And If He's Right? I'm really going now, but I leave you with this: the Rams will beat the spread, currently 14.5 points. If I'm wrong, we'll talk Monday. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Is It Deep Enough PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/03/2002 10:58:56 AM ----- BODY: But Is It Deep Enough for a Bomb Shelter? Having poked a sleeping giant with a pointy stick, VodkaPundit got exactly what he deserved. In a beautiful take-down by none other than Steve over at Happy Fun Pundit, yours truly gets ripped a new one big enough for the entire al Qaeda and their multiple wives to hide out in. Great Sunday morning fun. Oh, and go Rams! See you Monday. PS The fries were great. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Because Eating Servo Would Be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 10:13:44 AM ----- BODY: Because Eating Servo Would Be Weird Been eating crow all night and morning over the Superbowl. Plus I'm out a hundred bucks. Let's face it -- lots of money changed hands last night. From the many to the few. Still, there was that one last excellent quarter of football -- more than enough to make up for the first three. Don't worry, I'm getting to the news now. Some real commentary in a jiff. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Did They Buy Commercial Time PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 10:27:25 AM ----- BODY: Did They Buy Commercial Time on Baywatch? Reporting from Afghanistan, this UPI story claims that al Qaeda once tried to kill Clinton. Further investigation reveals that after botching the first try, al Qaeda decided against any further assassination attempts because, captured documents say, "Clinton alive in the White House is our best ally." Instead, al Qaeda focused money into groups urging the repeal of the 22nd Amendment. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bee-Gees at #1; Green Gets PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 10:35:30 AM ----- BODY: Bee-Gees at #1; Green Gets First Star Wars Figure; Amon Blogs! Dale Amon, Samizdata's Belfast correspondent, has a lovely essay on the -- surprisingly long! -- history of blogging. My first exposure to the Internet was through the University of Missouri-Columbia's mainframe back in 1987. I remember the thrill of chatroom talks with people from Finland. But people blogging since the '70s? I had no idea. This thing is finally snowballing, kids. Hang on. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Difference Is, Falwell Only PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 10:46:59 AM ----- BODY: The Difference Is, Falwell Only Claims to Talk to God. Safire writes such good essays, it's easy sometimes to forget how good a reporter he can be. Especially with sources like Ariel Sharon. Read it. Sharon describes his conditions for further dealings with the Palestinians. And notice that's not "dealings with Arafat." Still the old general, Sharon meant it when he called Arafat irrelevant. He's now dealing with others. But can Arafat's underlings deliver what Arafat himself couldn't or wouldn't? Look at it this way. Like any good dictator, Arafat has left no clear line of succession for after he's gone. Which means his underlings must jockey for position. And one of the best ways to gain position is to be the guy who can deliver to the Israelis. And because the Israelis control the roads, airspace, ports, etc, the Palestinians can't do anything without them. That's the secret Arafat can't or won't understand. But the PA member who both understands that and can deliver what both sides need -- that's the man who will replace Arafat. And Sharon will make sure it's "someone we can do business with." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How Can They Fix a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:00:25 AM ----- BODY: How Can They Fix a Game in a Straightlaced Town Like New Orleans? Headline from Sarge Stryker: "Patriots Win Super Bowl; Physicists Re-examine Nature of Universe" We can do lots of those, Sarge. Pats Win, Lucifer Waxing Skis God Declares Ram "Pagan Symbol," Smites Team Warner Throws Interceptions, Game Anyone want to add some more? You've got my email. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Ken Lay Is Still Going PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:17:48 AM ----- BODY: Ken Lay Is Still Going to Hell It just occurs to me that "contempt of Congress" is a redundant phrase for any thinking person. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Keep Leaving Out Belize PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:25:42 AM ----- BODY: You Keep Leaving Out Belize The Anglosphere is a wonderful idea, and probably a necessary bit of self-defense after 9/11. We've got a dynamic culture (even when you include the Canadians), the world's foremost military, the highest of high tech, and the free flow of information to make them all work together. What we don't have is manpower. What do we have, 400 million, tops? Manpower is the least important factor with today's technology, but it is still a factor. So where do we get the masses? India, people, India. And I'm not talking about bringing back the Raj. But look -- India is a mostly-functioning democracy, they're moving steadily westward in thought and political orientation, and English is already their language of business and politics. And wouldn't they just love to join an exclusive group where they'd carry more weight than the Brits? Just a thought. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Doesn't Matter If He's Only PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:36:30 AM ----- BODY: Doesn't Matter If He's Only Been Here Since Lunch Will Warren is at it again. This time, Will takes his poison quill out on those idiots at FAIR. They're the anti-immigration idiots who think we'd all be fat and happy (and white) if we'd just seal off the borders. Right. Which brings me to an old rant of mine. I know "Indian" is a misnomer, but "Native American" really irks me. I was born here, I'm a native. Native Americans aren't even "native" -- Bering Land Bridge, anyone? And now there's evidence that some aboriginal tribes have European and Polynesean and everything else roots. You know, just like the rest of us. The question is only how long ago was it your ancestors came over, not even where. We've been a melting pot for millennia. In fact, if anti-immigration idiots want to be really true to their ideas, they should all move back to the Oldavai Gorge. And take the Green Party, Earth First!ers, and preservationists with them. But the beauty of America is, we can all be native. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Spoil the Dividers No links, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 12:11:02 PM ----- BODY: Spoil the Dividers No links, since those are all on my home machine, but I collected a few weekend stories and opinions claiming we should first topple Saddam, then take on the theothugocracy in Iran. I still argue we need to do things the other way around. Let's take a look at Iran. Iran's population is at the simmer level of another revolution. You've read the stories of the pro-freedom (pro-American, even!) soccer riots. You know about all the secret satilite dishes so they can watch our TV. Their population is young, so young most don't remember the Shah now. Oh, and beleive it or not, Iranians do have experience with democracy. Not in any form we'd recognize, but they make much better prospects as members of the free world than the Iraqis or even the Kuwaitis. All we have to do is turn up the heat a little to bring that simmer to a boil. Just one good push and the Iranian government will be tossed out into the street -- and the tossing will be done by the "Persian Street." Which would give us one less very serious worry in the campaign against Iraq. Now let's look at the Iraq side. Iraq is the most primitive of barbarian thugocracies. Without Saddam's terror to hold the place together, you've got Kurds in the north who want independence (a headache for our Turk allies -- a headache we need to help spare them), Sunnis in the middle who are used to murderously running the show, and Shiites down south who would love to join their theocratic Iranian brothers. Better the tyrant more like yourself. But wouldn't it be better for Iraq's Shiites to be looking to a democratic Iran, if the country can't be kept intact? Wouldn't it be easier for us to have Iranians we can lean on first, now that we can't trust the Saudis? And southern Iraq going to Iran with our blessings would make it easier for us to give oil-rich Mosul to the Turks. (With Kurdish autonomy as a condition, of course.) And the Sunni center of Iraq will get Marshall Planned. Iran, then Iraq. It might not happen that way, but I think it makes the most sense. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Want My Two Dollars! PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 12:20:15 PM ----- BODY: I Want My Two Dollars! Don't know how I missed Alex de Costillo for so long. His blog Fevered Rants has a Superbowl-as-metaphor-for-America piece that is neither fevered nor a rant. It's just some damn good writing that will leave you feeling damn good. A raised glass and a Permalink for Fevered Rants. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: There Was a Game on, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 12:27:42 PM ----- BODY: There Was a Game on, Damnit The promised archives and greatest hits sections are delayed, as you can see. Next week, I promise. Just gotta get out of my current daytime commitment (Thursday is the last day), and get the new computer up and running (delivery is tomorrow). Then this place will be good enough to charge a cover. Just kidding. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Arab Hospitality? Steven den Beste PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 01:15:29 PM ----- BODY: Arab Hospitality? Steven den Beste has, as usual, one of the best critiques about any subject today. This time, the good Captain analyzes Arafat's weekend NYT op-ed piece. Steven, you just left out one detail on the right of return, although perhaps it isn't germaine to your argument. But it makes a good excuse for me to talk a little shop. After Israel won its War of Independence in 1948, about 600,000 Palestinians became refugees in Egypt (via Gaza), Jordan (via the West Bank), and Syria (via the Golan Heights). This is well-known and well-reported, and, well, a pain in the ass. Less well known is that throughout the Moslem world, from Morocco to Iran, about 600,000 Jews were kicked out of their ancient homes. Many went to Israel. The Israeli refugees were welcomed by their new home. They were granted citizenship in Israel. They got jobs and built homes and had kids who are indistinguishable from "native" Israelis. "We are all Jews, are we not?" The grandchildren of the Palestinian refugees are still living in camps. Egypt and Syria and (to a lesser extent) Jordan, all preferred to keep the Palestinians in camps, where they could continue to provide a reason to hate Israel. "Look what Israel has done to our Arab brothers." Israel didn't do that -- every war produces refugees; it takes the "host" country to keep them that way. Hell, millions of Germans were kicked out of Poland and Czechoslovakia after WWII. But you don't see their granchildren living in tents. Millions of Poles were run out of Ukraine and Belarus at the same time. But you hear no horror stories of the Polish prison camps in the Pripet marshes. If Arabs ever expect peace in the Middle East, they must first make peace with their Palestinian brothers. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If That's What It Takes, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 01:39:39 PM ----- BODY: If That's What It Takes, Then Unablogger Will Never Make the Cut Kind words today from Suman Palit at Kolkata Libertarian for my India/Anglosphere piece. I'd gone over to Kolkata a couple of times, but never spent any real time reading his stuff. I'll be doing some catching up tonight -- and you should, too. A raised glass and a Permalink for Suman! I just have one nagging question: What did he do to get Posh Blogged at Samizdata? Am I finally going to have to stop long-distance hitting on Natalija Radic? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Wonder You Never See PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 02:10:05 PM ----- BODY: No Wonder You Never See Them Together It's official -- VodkaPundit is Tyler Durdan. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Good Tyrants Make Good Neighbors PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 03:02:16 PM ----- BODY: Good Tyrants Make Good Neighbors The government of China is making noises against Bush's inclusion of North Korea in the "Axis of Evil." China isn't afraid of US troops approaching the Yalu river again. China wouldn't mind seeing the government in Pyongyang toppled -- the Dear Leader is proving awfully dear to the Chinese treasury. And if the US did the toppling, the Chinese know we'd provide enough aid to keep millions of starving North Koreans from pouring across their border. What the Chinese dread is a democratic and prosperous Korea ruled in its entirety from Seoul. That would take away yet another excuse for the continued existence of their homegrown thugocracy, wouldn't it? So let's all be sweet to the nice tyrants in Beijing. Or -- alternate Plan B here -- not. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Pakistan Was Only Temporary More PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 03:41:54 PM ----- BODY: Pakistan Was Only Temporary More evidence that India would make a fine addition to the Anglosphere -- New Dehli is getting more and more cozy with Jerusalem. This is some fine work from Yossi Klein Halevi at The New Republic. Now throw in the de facto militray alliance between Israel and Turkey, and you have our three most important frontline allies in the War. Stay tuned. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hey, It's Not Like They're PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 04:14:24 PM ----- BODY: Hey, It's Not Like They're Using Gas Chambers This is big, but not exactly a surprise. Iran, living up to its Axis of Evil rep, reportedly has elite Revolutionary Guards units in Lebanon. The stpry goes on to explain that they've brought rockets with them -- Russian-designed Katyushas which could (and eventually will) rain down on the northern Israeli city of Haifa. Europe, are you listening? Do you care? Do you not understand how much of your own history helped create modern Moslem anti-Semitism? And they wonder why we act alone. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: At Least He's No Pat PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 06:27:33 PM ----- BODY: At Least He's No Pat Buchanan Out of some sort of masochism, I'm watching Bill O'Reilly on Fox. It occurs to me, Republicans shouldn't be too pleased with him -- he's no conservative. O'Reilly is a populist. How long can he keep his populist stripes with the money he's earning now? Who knows. One of these days, his Bill Bennett-is-a-pussy-on-drug-policy stance is going to come back and bite his ass. (If you'll remember, it was Bill Bennett on Larry King years ago, who called for the death penalty for drug dealers. Not enough for Bill O.) Right now he's rerunning a combative interview with the late Tem Demme, director of the movie "Blow." When we finally give up on the pointless drug war, I'll be watching O'Reilly that night. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How Far Down Would They PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 06:30:22 PM ----- BODY: How Far Down Would They Start a Tummy Tuck? Also from watching Fox, I can tell you that Greta van Susteren did indeed get her eyes done. From about the boobs up. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: For Once, Understatement Working on PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 07:14:38 PM ----- BODY: For Once, Understatement Working on creating the archives. HTML is not my friend. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Don't Ask for Full PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 07:30:17 PM ----- BODY: Just Don't Ask for Full Disclosure from 1989 Forgot to link this earlier. Rob Walker's Superbowl Ad Report Card is up on Slate. If you thought Rams fans were disappointed, wait until you read Walker. The worst of the bunch? You already know -- those dreadful anti-drug ads. FULL DISCLOSURE: VodkaPundit's drug of choice is vodka. Or Scotch. And Napa Valley cabernet sauvignon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Are You Sure You Don't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 07:32:15 PM ----- BODY: Are You Sure You Don't Mean Mengele? Enron CEO Ken Lay is missing. Insert your own Hitler-in-Argentina joke here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Mirror, Mirror Oops, guess I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 07:38:48 PM ----- BODY: Mirror, Mirror Oops, guess I should have finished reading the thing before linking to Rob Walker's Superbowl Ad Report Card. I got to the Budweiser critique, and found this: And then there was the Clydesdales ad. Part of a general Bud onslaught (see below), this spot has the iconic Clydesdales tromping through bucolic landscapes and, eventually, across the Brooklyn Bridge. From a field, the horses observe the Statue of Liberty, and, indeed, they bow down before it. This is almost certain to be the most-mocked ad of the game. And yet, I found it oddly moving. Probably this reflects very, very badly on me. B. Getting moved by patriotic images during wartime -- and he thinks this will reflect badly on him? To whom, Rob, to whom? I usually enjoy Walker's Ad Report Cards. Probably this reflects very, very badly on me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Test... PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:14:32 PM ----- BODY: Test... ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Second test... PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:24:19 PM ----- BODY: Second test... ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We're having issues getting the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:31:13 PM ----- BODY: We're having issues getting the links and the archives to work at the same time. Bear with me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: There's still family business to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/04/2002 11:50:02 PM ----- BODY: There's still family business to deal with and a new computer to install. Expect the links back Wednesday. Sorry, kids -- but I promise there will still be fun, amusing, and challenging posts. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: OK, every time I add PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/05/2002 09:01:59 AM ----- BODY: OK, every time I add any link to this page, my archives are screwed. Any suggestions? Other than re-programming the computer with a mallet, I mean. Tried that already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hell, all I have to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/05/2002 09:26:28 AM ----- BODY: Hell, all I have to do is change the slightest bit of this damn Blogger code and my archives throw a tizzy. What's up with that? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Grrrr. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/05/2002 09:29:24 AM ----- BODY: Grrrr. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I am saying very, very PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/05/2002 09:35:01 AM ----- BODY: I am saying very, very bad words this morning. And lots of them. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Can anyone give me one PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/05/2002 09:40:38 AM ----- BODY: Can anyone give me one good reason not to just get my own domain and do all this with FrontPage? Blogger is convinced that if I change so much as one character in the entire template, then I shouldn't be allowed the use of archives. That's no exaggeration. Microsoft, here I come... ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Writes the NYT editorial page PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/05/2002 11:00:41 AM ----- BODY: Writes the NYT editorial page today: The Bush budget is a road map toward a different kind of American society, in which the government no longer taxes the rich to aid the poor, and in fact does very little but protect the nation from foreign enemies. They say that like it's a bad thing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I might not have figured PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/05/2002 08:12:56 PM ----- BODY: I might not have figured out my code problem, but the new computer is up and running -- if not yet set to my odd ways. Tomorrow we'll be back to normal. With or without the links! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Happy birthday, Ron. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 10:05:59 AM ----- BODY: Happy birthday, Ron. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Happy birthday, Ron. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 10:05:59 AM ----- BODY: Happy birthday, Ron. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: First Curling, Now This Taking PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 10:11:33 AM ----- BODY: First Curling, Now This Taking a public relations cue from the same agency the House of Saud must use, the International Olympic Committee has banned outright displays of patriotism by Americans and the new flag of the interim Afghan government. (Although something tells me the IOC would be just fine with more Black Panther fists) Drudge has the scoop over on his site. No word yet, however, if the IOC is going to fulfill a promise to limit "all that nasty competitiveness between athletes that's ruining the Olympic spirit." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Latest Oil Rig Doesn't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 10:22:33 AM ----- BODY: The Latest Oil Rig Doesn't Make You Modern Wise words of advice to the Arab League from "George W. Bush," via Thomas Friedman. Best line: "There is one thing I can guarantee, though. If you don't make this offer, nothing will change, the Israeli silent majority will continue following Sharon into a dead end, and the Arab League will fall further and further behind the rest of the world. " And so true. Only two things of importance come out of the Arab world in the 21st Century, and those are oil and terrorist violence. If they want to join the real world, they have to stop exporting the second and stop relying entirely on exports of the first. To do so, they must make peace first (as I argued two days ago) with the Palestinians, then with the Israelis. Why is it Moslems can accomplish anything in any country -- except where Arabs rule? It is time for Arab governments to abandon their self-imposed exile from modernity. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: As Accurate as His Superbowl PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 11:04:12 AM ----- BODY: As Accurate as His Superbowl Prediction? What is it about the chattering class that they think they can get Bush to back down from the Axis of Evil? In his NYT op-ed piece, Michael O'Hanlon is the latest to take a try at it. First, O'Hanlon tries to give Bush an honorable way to back out of his commitment to fight the evildoers. He writes, "He implied that the United States might take strong action against all parts of this global collection of unpalatable actors." Implied? Implied? Bush said everything but the old kick ass/chew bubblegum line. But in the non-absolute world of leftwing punditry, I suppose even the strongest statements are just mere implications. Then this gem: "This is particularly true of North Korea and its tyrannical ruler, Kim Jong Il. North Korea remains heavily armed and threatening, and largely as a result of its excessive military spending, its citizens are extremely poor." Take away North Korea's defense budget and add it to, oh, building decent farms and food distribution system, and guess what you have? You still have a desperately poor and hungry country. Military spending didn't bankrupt North Korea, communist "economics" did that. The next bit is truly priceless. "We can work with Kim Jong Il — provided that we are smart about how we do it." Uh-huh. Michael, unless by "smart" you mean "smart bombs," then no, we can't. The Dear Leader is out for one thing -- to keep his own ass alive and in power. (The two are the same thing. For proof, see Mussilini, Hitler, et al.) The slightest relaxation and he's gone. And he knows it. Oh, we might be able to pull the same number we did with Gorbachev -- let him negotiate himself and his country out of business -- but Kim is too shrewd for that. VodkaPundit Bar Bet: The Chinese will help us "deal" with Kim Jong Il. If only to keep South Korea's influence to a minimum. Any takers? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sanity Prevails The IOC has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 11:10:23 AM ----- BODY: Sanity Prevails The IOC has reversed itself and will allow "athletes and heros" to carry the flag during the opening ceremonies. One dry martini and two very damp eyes for the IOC. Do yourself a favor and watch. The hoisting of that flag will, I think, mark the end of the beginning for us. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why We Need to Tackle PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 11:20:24 AM ----- BODY: Why We Need to Tackle Iran Before Iraq, Part II Do yourself a favor and read S. Rob Sobhani's piece in today's OpinionJournal. In it, he praises Bush's SOTUA distinction between the freedom-desiring people of Iran and their theothugcratic government. He also argues convincingly against those who would normalize relations with the mullahs in order to gain "influence." For starters, the mullahs wouldn't have it. "Were the American flag to be hoisted at an embassy in Tehran tomorrow, young Iranians would line up for miles to obtain U.S. visas." There you have it -- one good push and Iran joins the civilized world. Their people want and deserve it. And we owe it to them to help. Then think of the ally we'd have against Saddam. Best part? The Saudis would truly tremble. You can read Part I here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Best to Not Mention Evolution PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 11:25:31 AM ----- BODY: Best to Not Mention Evolution Bloomberg reports that the Saudi government has finally admitted that 15 of the 19 September 11 barbarian killers were, indeed, Saudi citizens. However, a spokesman for the Kingdom said the House of Saud was still not ready to take a firm position on the Law of Gravity and maintains that the Rams won the Superbowl in a 53-21 blowout. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Is Not Another Order PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 11:45:41 AM ----- BODY: This Is Not Another Order from the Voices in his Head Set your VCR/Tivo/whatever for Sunday, March 10, 9pm Eastern/8pm Central to your CBS affiliate. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Next Week, Geraldo Lyposunctions His PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 12:06:29 PM ----- BODY: Next Week, Geraldo Lyposunctions His Skull Where is Sarge Stryker today? And I thought I was having blog problems. Well, I'm thinking of getting Sekimori to re-do this site for me. The plan is to give it the same look as before, only with working links and an archive. Plus a few nips and tucks here and there. Far less work than Greta van Susteren's boobs-on-up "eye job." Hey, maybe when she says eye job, she means she had work done FOR our eyes, not just ON hers. Can you believe it took this long for someone to come up with a Geraldo/lyposuction joke? If you can cite an earlier one, please let me know. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We're Not Holding Our Breath PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 12:17:22 PM ----- BODY: We're Not Holding Our Breath for the "Myanmar Libertarian" The US is hardly a libertarian Utopia, but we're still the freest, most dynamic, richest country in our weight class. So this makes Kolkata's multi-part series "Towards a Free(er) Market" such compelling reading. We have the rare privilege of watching up close as a formerly socialist, autarkic economy peacefully attempts to make the transition to a market-based, rule-of-law economy. Head over there and check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Worth Your Time A National PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 12:49:21 PM ----- BODY: Worth Your Time A National Review Online Q&A with Peggy Noonan about her former boss, Ronald Reagan. She talks as well as she writes. UPDATE: I just had to steal this quote from the interview: "...Some dog was brought into the Oval Office for some reason, I don't recall. The dog's running around and Reagan's doing his work. Mike Deaver comes in and says, 'Mr. President, if you don't get that dog out of here he's going to pee on your desk.' And Reagan said, 'Why not, everybody else does.'" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How Many for the Whole PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 01:08:37 PM ----- BODY: How Many for the Whole Lot of Them? Will Warren does it again, demonstrating in gorgeous verse why I'd happily trade a hundred lilly-white FAIR supporters for a single Mexican or Indian or Vietnamese or Congo immigrant. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Oui Were Only Following Orders PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 01:23:19 PM ----- BODY: Oui Were Only Following Orders Glenn Reynolds has been doing his always excellent job, this time collecting stories of French anti-Semitism. I always thought Vichy was a little too enthusiastic in their collaboration with the Germans. And now they don't have the "Nazis made us do it" card to play. Anyway, the good Prof points the way to this Weekly Standard article you should take a look at. Question for Sarge Stryker: How many B-1B's would it take to liberate France from Paris? Or Europe from Brussels? The headline for this story is my worst pun in ages. I apologize. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Damn Wine-Swilling Negotiation Whores "And PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 02:15:50 PM ----- BODY: Damn Wine-Swilling Negotiation Whores "And I mean it," is what Ayn Rand said is the postscript to her writing. Someone ought to tell the press here at home and governments abroad that Bush damn well meant what he said in his State of the Union Address. There are no bargaining chips, there are no fancy deals to be struck. There are simply new civilized rules of behavior for nation-states and even "non-governmental organizations" (don't you just love UN orthodoxy?) and those who don't play by the rules will be paid a deadly visit. And he means it. Carrot: You get to join the world community and maybe get very, very rich. Stick: Daisey cutter aimed by Special Forces guys with laser pointers. To read the same point, only made much more eloquently, see Ariel Cohen and Michael Kelly. In the meantime, I'm writing my congressman to see if he'll sponsor a Joint Resolution asking France to "Shut the Hell Up Already." And maybe to do something about the potholes on Platte near Wabash. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: George Bush Hanged Some Kid's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 02:26:24 PM ----- BODY: George Bush Hanged Some Kid's Dog Somebody (Glenn Reynolds? I don't remember) linked to this The New Republic story, claiming TNR had become one of the more dynamic magazines out there these days. To which I forcefully reply, "Huh?" The first half was some interesting reporting on Tom Harkin, John Breaux, and others, telling Gore -- in modulated polibabble -- not to run again in '04. Pretty good stuff, I have to admit. But then... ...but then we get to the second half, which is a typical left-liberal laundry list of complaints against the Administration. You know the list: Tax cuts go to the people who pay taxes! Social Security reform will lead to old people getting raped by Enron! Dick Cheney wants to defoliate Alaska! Yadda yadda yadda. At least Earth First! pamphlets have pictures of cute fuzzy little animals. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why, That Would Be As PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 02:38:39 PM ----- BODY: Why, That Would Be As Silly As If Reno Kept Her Job After Waco Watching CIA director George Tenet testify before the Senate this morning, I have to admit I'd forgotten how impressive the man can be. Forthright, commanding, sensible. But his agency still screwed the pooch 9/11, and the buck is supposed to stop at his desk. He really should have resigned as soon as the dust settled, no pun intended. When the troops see the boss isn't accountable, how is any top-down reform supposed to be implemented? It might be arguable that Tenet should keep his job, but it cannot be rationally argued that no changes are needed at the CIA. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But What Does Kolkata Have PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 02:47:42 PM ----- BODY: But What Does Kolkata Have to Say on This? Speaking of the CIA, that agency reports today that the chance of war between India and Pakistan is higher than at any time since 1971. And if you'll remember, 1971 saw the war that midwifed the birth of Bangledesh (formerly "East Pakistan"). We've never had a direct confrontation between two nuclear-armed powers. What scares me isn't so much escalation as it is Pakistan's command-and-control issues with their nukes, combined with the fact that much of their government (ISA in particular) is aligned with the Axis of Evil. Loose nukes? Nukes for sale? New Dehli's soldiers can't march fast enough to overrun all of Pakistan, and I'm not sure we'd want them to, anyway. Best we can hope is that Colin Powell does a good job of keeping those two apart, or that common sense breaks out. India, having come so far these last few years, has the most to lose. It would only take one good war to set their economy back to about 1980 -- and their politics even further. Add nukes to the equation, and... let's not go there. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Do You Believe in Miracles? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 03:09:38 PM ----- BODY: Do You Believe in Miracles? InstaPundit isn't a fan of the Olympics, and he makes some pretty damning-because-they're-accurate criticisms of the Games. Of course the Games aren't really amateur. Of course half or more of the events are idiotic pseudo-sports. Of course they don't promote world peace -- or even fight tooth decay. Of course the IOC is a hypocritical bunch of Swiss Alp-junketing pocket-liners. But you get to see the best of the best from the entire world competing in some real sports. That alone is worth some serious TV time every couple of years. And sometimes, just sometimes, you get to see a real miracle. You hockey fans old enough to remember 1980 know what I'm talking about. Besides, this year those opening ceremonies will leave you weeping. Don't let the good Professor rain on what should prove to be a fine parade. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit Salute Anyone who takes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 04:26:50 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit Salute Anyone who takes on Pat Buchanan with such reasoned force is my kind of guy. A raised glass and a Permalink (when we get the links working again, that is) to Kevin Holtsberry of Ideas, Etc. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call If you have PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 11:15:16 PM ----- BODY: Last Call If you have a common piece of firewall software -- let's call it "Morton" -- without so much as cookie blocking or browser privacy activated, then you can't load up MSNBC.com's Opinion Page. But I've found I don't really need it that badly; I've got the Bloggospere. Also, I got to write a nicely nasty little letter to their editor before leaving them forever. A nice end to a nice day. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call, Part II In PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/06/2002 11:17:37 PM ----- BODY: Last Call, Part II In case you missed it on Letterman. Top Ten Taliban Complaints About Camp X-Ray 10. "Three meals a day and none of them are goat" 9. "'Death to America' T-shirts only come in cotton/poly blend" 8. "Can't get used to this whole warm bed, cooked food, running water thing" 7. "Lying American propaganda makes it seem like Taliban is losing" 6. "Television only gets one channel and it's CBS" 5. "Achmed totally stole my skit idea for camp talent show" 4. "Have you seen the bathrooms? I've lived in caves with better facilities" 3. "Haven't gotten one X-ray" 2. "Just because you're a bearded nut in Cuba everyone assumes you know Fidel" 1. "Dude in next cell keeps bragging he used to be head of Enron" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But You Don't Need To PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 10:35:10 AM ----- BODY: But You Don't Need To Move Your Lips If you missed it yesterday, here's a link to the latest G-File. While you're reading that, I'll finish my coffee, then have another large Lightnote blend in a desperate attempt to become awake enough to be pithy and amusing. So read Goldberg slowly. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Canada Is the "Mostly PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 10:58:46 AM ----- BODY: And Canada Is the "Mostly OK Dominion" Michael Novak has a great column in OpinionJournal today. I just wish he'd published it on Reagan's birthday yesterday, because of this passage: Some years afterwards, in fact, U.S. arms negotiators, reminiscing over the bad old days with their now-no-longer Soviet counterparts at a happy dinner, were interrupted by a fist slamming down upon the table. "You know what caused the downfall of the Soviet Union? You know what did it?" demanded a senior general, a little flush with vodka. Some racked their brains with thoughts of missile defense, perpetual shortages of everything from soap to vodka, the U.S. military buildup. The general banged his fist again. "That damn speech about the evil empire! That's what did it!" The general was standing now, and to the questioning eyes of one American he added: "It was an evil empire. It was." The power of morality expressed in words as a simple idea. Never forget. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Dancing Pundit Men Bill PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 11:04:56 AM ----- BODY: The Dancing Pundit Men Bill Safire finally publishes a correction to his Holmes piece from way back when last month, admitting that Silver Blaze wasn't the name of the dog that didn't bark. Oh, and Bill -- it was the Blue Carbuncle. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Only If the Turks PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 11:13:35 AM ----- BODY: But Only If the Turks Don't Want It Rich Lowry becomes the latest to join Glenn Reynolds' Dump the Saudis Chorus. Lowry manages to find an angle I hadn't seen yet. The Saudis don't want us to topple Saddam for two reasons: One, they no longer fear him, and; Two, they do fear a post-Saddam, democratic Iraq. Think about that a moment. A Marshall-Planned Iraq, as democratic -- and US-friendly -- as Germany or Japan. Now there's a threat to the Repressors of Riyadh. Read the whole thing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogger Might Be Slow, But PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 11:38:17 AM ----- BODY: Blogger Might Be Slow, But at Least It's Unreliable Am I the only one unable to connect to my site the last half hour? We'll be moving off Blogger in the next few weeks. I hate to put out the money for a real domain and server and bandwidth -- but Blogger seems to joy in crapping out on me. Stay tuned for details. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Have No Idea How PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 12:16:49 PM ----- BODY: You Have No Idea How Many Names He Wanted to Drop Just Now Back to OpinionJournal for a moment, where Kimberly Strassel wrote a particularly damning essay about the wide, wide gulf between the International Olympic Committee's lofty ambitions and its taudry reality. I still love the Games, and always will. But if we can sweep away a barbarian horde in Afghanistan while hardly breaking a sweat, surely we can clean the IOC's house in Switzerland. Colorado Springs, where I live, is an Olympics-heavy town. The old Broadmoor World Arena was once home to almost all our skaters, who still come here for final training in the rarified air at 6,000 feet. The US Olympic Training Center is just a few miles from my house. We hold tournies and competitions and events all year 'round. Hell, the VodkaFiance works for the head of the United States Figure Skating Association, also HQ'd here. I was raised a flatlander in St Louis -- but my Olympic-minded cousin (now an international skating judge) moved here to train 22 years ago, and I fell in love with this place visiting him. And towns don't come much more clean than this one, even at the OTC. If we can do it here, we can make them do it there. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Nothing Wrong with Europe Except PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 12:46:18 PM ----- BODY: Nothing Wrong with Europe Except for All Those Damn Europeans From Sarge Stryker's blog: The VodkaPundit asks: "Question for Sarge Stryker: How many B-1B's would it take to liberate France from Paris? Or Europe from Brussels?" Dude, I don't think it's worth the gas. Besides, there's the possibility, however remote, that an American might die doing this feat. They're not worth the life of one American. Perhaps the French Foreign Legion, with its stellar combat record, can do the job... In all seriousness, a weak Europe might be to our (and the world's) benefit, at least in the short term. The long run problem with a weak Europe, of course, is you eventually get a Mussolini or a Hitler or a Stalin who comes along, promising to make them all strong again. And then we have to put our boots on and clean our rifles. Europe's civil wars just this century have cost untold millions of lives. We traveled as freight in cargo ships to move here from Europe. We go back to sightsee in luxurious cruise ships. And sometimes we have to hit their beaches from Higgins boats to clean up their messes. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Won't he Go Back PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 01:43:47 PM ----- BODY: Why Won't he Go Back to Bitching About the News? Forgive the posting dearth today. Not much has grabbed my interest or tickled my funnybone -- plus I'm still working on the ancient computer I was bitching about last week. The one that's crashed four times already today because I sometimes use more than one window. Also, I've been loading up Samizdata for -- seven minutes at last count, and still not done. Tomorrow, it's back to normal. Days spent at home, cruising the news, posting to the blog on the new 2.2GhzP4 (neener), and yelling at the broker. Hell, it'll back back to normal in about four hours. Whew! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's a Lousy Place to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 02:15:05 PM ----- BODY: It's a Lousy Place to Visit, But You Wouldn't Want to Live There As someone who spent two years living on Geary near Polk in SanFran (the heart of the Tenderloin), DailyPundit's rant on how tough (yes, tough) SF is was like a blast of smoggy air. I mean that as a compliment to DailyPundit and a slam on SF. Read it here. UPDATE: So far, I've been trying to post this snippet for 20 minutes, thanks to Blogger or this machine -- I don't know which. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: San Francisco -- A Commuter's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 02:59:39 PM ----- BODY: San Francisco -- A Commuter's Tale Exit apartment building on Geary, give cigarette to the nice bum who claims to be "trying to get my sax out of hock." Walk one block down Larkin to Post. Along the way, scurry to avoid the semi-attractive woman. She'd be fully attractive were she not weaving, smiling, and naked save for one combat boot, what might have once been sweatpants, and a loose, open denim jacket. The one breast I see is perfectly-shaped beneath the filth. Wait two minutes or less for Geary bus downtown, handing out two more cigarettes to bums and turning down one proposition from a male hooker. Get on bus, try not to touch anything or anyone -- difficult to do while standing and bus is coming to a stop. "Grime" is the word stuck in my head. Get off bus at Market Street, in the heart of the Financial District. Skyscrapers tower overhead, but at ground level, the stench of human urine is almost overwhelming. Get ready to hand out more cigarettes during the two-block walk to Shacklee Terrace. Inside the door -- clean air, clean floors, clean people. Won't have to endure Hell again for eight more hours. All the above happens in less than fifteen minutes. All of it happens before 7:00 AM. The commute home will be worse. By late afternoon, the bums will all be awake, they will all be drunk or drugged out, they will be more aggressive and maybe no longer placated by my offer of smokes instead of cash. And in San Francisco, they have more rights than I do. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "If Everyone Just Made Less PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 03:48:21 PM ----- BODY: "If Everyone Just Made Less Money, We'd All Be Richer." Eric Alterman, normally too stupid to put out a fire if it was on his nose, really outdoes himself today. "According to just-released government figures, the number of Americans with million-dollar incomes more than doubled during the second half of the ’90s." Alterman lists this as a complaint. More people doing better is a bad thing, says Eric. So I'm just guessing here, but it must really warm his cockles whenever some poor slob takes a pay cut to keep his job. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How Many Pundits Does it PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 03:58:34 PM ----- BODY: How Many Pundits Does it Take to Get the Same Point Wrong in the Same Way? Micheal Moran, also at MSNBC (why do I bother?), is the latest to try to hang Bush's State of the Union Address with coalition rope. Next to a very goofy picture of the President are the words: "With a strident tone and unrealistic expectations, Team Bush is squandering the good will of its allies." What is unrealistic about civilization protecting itself from barbarians, wherever they may be found? What is strident about calling people who threaten to nuke Israel "evil?" What use is the good will of allies when they neither have any good will for us nor act like allies? Answer those three questions before writing another word, Michael. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Byrd Claims O'Neill Used PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/07/2002 04:26:40 PM ----- BODY: And Byrd Claims O'Neill Used to Wet the Bed Here's something I'm sorry I missed today -- an emotional exchange between SecTreas Paul O'Neill and Sen. Robert Byrd. Apparently, O'Neill not-so-subtly reminded the world of Byrd's past as a Klansman. Link here courtesy of Drudge. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: T.G.I.F. and All That The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 11:18:59 AM ----- BODY: T.G.I.F. and All That The weekend is starting a bit early -- and we're working on the new look. So fewer posts today, but things will be back to freakishly normal on Monday. Meantime, go read Krauthammer. His subject is why Arafat must go -- either just go away or go the nine millimeter retirement plan (also sometimes called "coup flu"). Best line about The Bearded One? "This is Lucy and the football. How many moments of truth does a liar get?" According to Krauthammer, the answer is: No more. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Half a Dozen Stingers for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 11:35:47 AM ----- BODY: Half a Dozen Stingers for One Little Pony Keg of 3.2? Outrageous! We now have more soldiers patrolling Utah than we do Afghanistan. An odd bit of trivia, with one worrying detail. Where are the men going to get their beer? I'm far less worried about a terrorist strike in Salt Lake City than I am about restless troops with no beer. It's one thing to go without in the Arabian desert. There was a real war on, in a real foreign country, and you were out in the middle of damn nowhere. Flash forward to 2002. You're in a (supposedly) American city with no real work to do and the biggest party in the world going on right in front of you. Man, this could get ugly. Kidding, of course. Our men and women will do just fine. My only hope is they actually get to enjoy some of the Games. They've earned it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If He Stopped Making Sense, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 12:19:52 PM ----- BODY: If He Stopped Making Sense, Would He Become David Byrne? Andrew Sullivan reports that U2’s Bono is now making sense. Forget the Apocalypse jokes for a minute, this is truly serious. For a loudmouth idiot who hasn’t put out a decent album since “Sunday Bloody Sunday,” this is big news. But I’m more likely to take Bono’s opinions on Third World debt relief seriously than I am to ever buy a copy of “The Joshua Tree.” ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's An Awfully Big Attack PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 12:22:54 PM ----- BODY: That's An Awfully Big Attack Helicopter Just to Make an Arrest Something you should read over on the NYT op-ed page that WON’T raise your blood pressure. Nicolas D. Kristof, who I’m really starting to respect, does some fine reporting on the barbarians we’re helping fight in the southern Philippines. Kristof says that the Abu Sayyaf rebel group isn’t a rebel group at all. Merely a bunch of thugs who kidnap for money -- common criminals, really, he claims. Which means Kristof is helping make my point – that whether they claim to be terrorists or rebels, they’re all barbarians and need to be handled as such. Marxist, Islamist, Separatist… forget it. Barbarians is the word. Good reading. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Ken Lay Also Chews With PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 12:25:25 PM ----- BODY: Ken Lay Also Chews With His Mouth Open Most everything that needs to be said about the collapse of Enron (other than the occasional reminder that Paul Krugman used to whore for the company) is said today by the Wall Street Journal’s Daniel Henninger. As a libertarian, I don’t believe in the government enforcing social norms. But as a civilized human, I know that individuals have to do so – or everything goes the Enron route. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: His Fiance is Working All PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 12:29:27 PM ----- BODY: His Fiance is Working All Weekend, So Give Him a Break Here This, quoted in its entirety from Lucianne.com: All Chair, No Whip: Greta von Susteren rounded out her first week of seeing the world through new eyes with a confrontation with Dick Morris that shows her Clinton-loving ways aren't going to fly at Fox. At least not with their regular contributors. On last night's show, Dick went so far as to tell her, as she frantically tried to spin the Clinton line on terrorism efforts, that she was - gasp! - "still a CNN person." It was amazing to watch her former face return. That's a great big bed over there at Fox. Everybody get comfy and no pinching. (Final transcript will be posted when complete.) I'll keep my eye out for the whole transcript for you. Could be some fun weekend reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Problem Is, Not Even the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 12:36:13 PM ----- BODY: Problem Is, Not Even the Turks Want Syria Back Glenn Reynolds got the ball rolling with his call for a Hashemite or Kemalist Arabia. Then most of the sensible part of the Blogosphere joined in. Yesterday, Tim Lowry over at National Review Online piped up, and now, Tom Gross at NRO does the same thing. Where does it go from here? Who knows -- but it will get bigger. Read this line: "The Saudi regime — not merely its exiled son, Osama bin Laden — bears a major share of the responsibility for international terrorism." Notice he reports "the Saudi regime." Not just some misguided Arabian youth, but the government itself. If GWB becomes convinced of that (if he isn't already) then we know what he'll do about it. While Gross doesn't go so far as Reynolds or other bloggers, he comes close. House of Saud, your days are numbered. UPDATE: No matter how many ideas NRO borrows from Blogland, Jonah Goldberg will probably still never admit that The Corner (no link!) is a blog. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And We'll Give Volvo Back PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 01:17:55 PM ----- BODY: And We'll Give Volvo Back to the Swedes DailyPundit's William Quick reminds us of a point I first saw approximately ever ago, then forgot about. Namely, Japan's financial problems are far from over -- because when a bubble pops, it crashes lower than when it launched. Lester Thurow (I think it was him) made the same point back in the mid-90's, but it's easy not to think about Japan. Anyway, Quick does a great job with this, including fancy charts of the Dow during the Great Depression and the Nikkei since it collapsed. Conclusion: Japan is gonna keep digging before it can start climbing again. Well, that's assuming their graying population, shrinking workforce, declining birthrate, and uncontrolled deflation ever allow them to climb again. Now if only the Germans would do something equally stupid, we could get Chrysler back. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Forgot to Ask for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 01:24:26 PM ----- BODY: He Forgot to Ask for a Discount Before Placing This Ad Sekimori tells me she's working now on my new template. No major changes, but some big improvements. Check out her work here and her blog here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also Known As "Dry Dreams" PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 01:57:20 PM ----- BODY: Also Known As "Dry Dreams" A valuable history lesson from Victor Davis Hanson. I thought I'd made a couple of his points already, but a search through my posts comes up blank. Must've been one of those dream-posts -- and, yeah, I've had a couple. Scary. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Putting the "Wee!" Back in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 02:11:51 PM ----- BODY: Putting the "Wee!" Back in Weekend My favorite newish blog, Douglas Turnbull's Beauty of Gray, has a facinating post on what it takes to play in the big leagues, army style. Not only does a decent tank cost a few million bucks, but the R&D alone breaks most national banks, says Douglas. However, he left out two important points. First, you also need the industrial know-how and machine tools. Only a small handful of nations can work with depleted uranium to make shells for an A-10 or sabot rounds. Very few indeed can even conceive of Chobham armor, much less manufacture it. The list goes on. Secondly, and this is the important bit, tank and attack choppers and air-superiority fighters just don't matter as much as they used to. We live in an age of asymmetrical warfare. Most Arab nations can't cope with modernity enough to do much more than buy second-rate Soviet or Chinese weapons, coupled with training and doctrine that are third rate at best. But what does that matter when you can take a Boeing 767 and turn it into a human-guided cruise missile? How can even the most recent variant of M1 Abrahms defend against a computer network attack? How many F-16 squadrons does it take to defend an Israeli housewife and her daughter from a barbarian with a pistol? Saddam Hussein didn't invade Kuwaiit again last year -- but he did provide intelligence and training to our attackers. I'm not saying the situation is hopeless -- far from it. This is a war we will win. What I am saying is that we live in a new world, one in which holding the Fulda Gap means little compared to holding pre-emptive intelligence. We can always liberate enemy-held territory. But how do we liberate enemy mind from hatered or re-take the innocence buried in the wreckage of the World Trade Center? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Extra Space is for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 02:22:29 PM ----- BODY: The Extra Space is for the Patriot Missile Battery If NYC Mayor Bloomberg thinks he has his hands full with the city's always fractious factions, just wait until the real fight begins over what to do with the site of the WTC. Everybody with an opinion -- about six out of every five people -- thinks he knows exactly what should be done with the site, and no two opinions agree. In fact, most of the "big" ideas are so completely opposed that no compromise seems possible. So I'm going to defer to former Mayor Ed Koch, who says the Twin Towers should be rebuilt exactly as they were. Except for one little detail, Mr. Mayor: They should be exactly one story fuckin' taller. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: James Taranto Apes VodkaPundit! This PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 02:50:09 PM ----- BODY: James Taranto Apes VodkaPundit! This just in from today's Best of the Web: Osama bin Jafar Faqih, the Saudi trade minister, is siding with Iran's mad mullahs against America. "Not only do the threats of Bush against Iran not damage relations between Iran and Saudi Arabia, but they strengthen ties between the two countries," Agence France-Presse quotes Faqih as saying. It's not surprising that Saudi Arabia would side with the Iranian tyrants; a free Iran across the Persian Gulf would make the repressive Saudi regime look that much worse by comparison. Now, let's compare that to one of my recent posts: Iran's population is at the simmer level of another revolution. You've read the stories of the pro-freedom (pro-American, even!) soccer riots. You know about all the secret satilite dishes so they can watch our TV. Their population is young, so young most don't remember the Shah now. Oh, and beleive it or not, Iranians do have experience with democracy.... ...wouldn't it be better for Iraq's Shiites to be looking to a democratic Iran, if the country can't be kept intact? Wouldn't it be easier for us to have Iranians we can lean on first, now that we can't trust the Saudis?" If you search through the archives, you can find several references to my "First Iran, Then Iraq" proposal, going all the way back to my second post. Advantage: VodkaPundit! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Wait Until You See the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 08:42:57 PM ----- BODY: Wait Until You See the Snowboarding Sloths Watching the Opening Ceremonies of the 2002 Winter Olympiad in Salt Lake City, I think Bob Costas speaks for all the peoples of the world when he says, "There's nothing I enjoy more than a bunch of skatin' coyotes." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Do You Believe In Miracles? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/08/2002 10:06:56 PM ----- BODY: Do You Believe In Miracles? How perfect was that? In a typically American act of defiance towards anyone who doubts our resolve, our 1980 gold-medal-winning, Soviet-juggernaut-defeating, hockey team lit the cauldron in Salt Lake City. Words fail me. Oh, and a Raised Glass Salute to the first person who can tell me what team we beat in 1980 to win the gold in hockey. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Stacy Tabb of Sekimori is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/10/2002 11:50:30 AM ----- BODY: Stacy Tabb of Sekimori is busy working on the new design, but we're still having an issue or two. Love what she's done, and hope you can wait until we're completely back in business Monday. Enjoy what's left of the weekend, kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Gander is Soused OK, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/10/2002 09:42:42 PM ----- BODY: The Gander is Soused OK, Stacy and I finished troubleshooting the template and all is now well. Don't even ask what the solution was -- it's too incredible even for fiction. Meantime, I hope to have all the links back to where they should be sometime Monday. The plan was to finish all that tonight, but we overindulged a wee bit on the Cab Sauv over at the in-laws-to-be's house, so I'm just not feeling up to it right now. However, I can promise you that tomorrow's hangover should lead to some deliciously cranky commentary. Salud! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Dogs and Cats Not Living PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 10:52:46 AM ----- BODY: Dogs and Cats Not Living Anywhere Near Each Other There's a long -- but worthwhile -- piece in OpinionJournal today on Red and Blue America by Blake Hurst. Spend some time with it today. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Only Web-Site With that PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 10:56:22 AM ----- BODY: The Only Web-Site With that Clean, Fresh Scent New features! Not only did Stacy Tabb get the archives working, she also added a fun little comment feature. At least now you'll have an easier way of venting back at me. Also, I'm busy putting together a Greatest Hits page, as well as rebuilding all the links. Hang in there. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Y'all Come Back Now, Y'hear? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 10:58:51 AM ----- BODY: Y'all Come Back Now, Y'hear? Go read today's Non-Sequitur. No arguments, just do it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Someone Feed Him Some Politics PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 11:11:05 AM ----- BODY: Someone Feed Him Some Politics Already In a display of... something, NBC continues to draw record viewers for the Olympics in Salt Lake City. Drudge has the numbers in a storyless header at the top of his page. As a big fan of the Games, I find this distressing. NBC's coverage is saccharine, over-blown, and -- to borrow from Holden Caufield -- it's phony. Maybe we should be happy that in the uncertain time of war, Americans can come together from across a continent, even if just in front of their televisions. And yet -- if only ABC still broadcast the Olympics. Say what you will about him as a person, but Roone Alderidge knew how to make sports work on TV, without all the rags-to-rags-but-look-what-a-competitor! background stories that NBC feels it needs to spoon-feed us. Look, we know already that athletes have to wake up very early and work very hard for a very, very long time to make it to the Games. We know that cancer or MD or whatever disease is in the athlete-of-the-moment's family is just awful. Really, there's no need to give us much more than the briefest of bios -- qnd then show us some damn sports! And two more things -- somebody send Tom Brokaw a speech therapist and, please, someone punch Katie Couric right in the mouth. Forget the sizzle, damnit. Serve us the damn steak already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Short, Bright Tea-Time of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 11:51:30 AM ----- BODY: The Short, Bright Tea-Time of Iran "Hundreds of thousands" of Iranians rallied against the US this weekend in Tehran. The mob was reportedly all stirred up about President Bush's inclusion of Iran in the Axes of Evil. It just ain't so. First, inciting a mob is one of the easiest things for a dictatorship to do. People know they're being watched, and act accordingly. Also, protesting is kinda fun. Ask anyone born from 1946 to around 1955. You get to dress down and carry sign and chant slogans. And there's some great comradery. Also, you get to prove your street creds to young women, who might be willing to show some horizontal appreciation for your dedication to the cause. Second, compare these semi-state-planned riots to the spontaneous ones in Iran last year. You remember -- the pro-American, pro-Freedom, pro-let's-get-rid-of-the-Mullahs. A real riot doesn't start with a time broadcast on the official TV station. Here's the telling line from the AP report: "State television reported that millions of people took part in similar rallies staged in all major cities." [Italics mine] "Staged" is right, people. The guys with the army and dank prisons announce there's going to be a riot downtown at three. You'd rather sit in front of the tube and watch pirated American movies, but your neighbor is a pretty pious sort, and you're worried he might mention to one of those scary government guys your lack of enthusiasm. So you go and wave your arms and shout and have some fun. Want to start a real riot in Iran? Announce that months of secret preparations are complete, and we'll be supporting the armed democratic opposition working out of Pakistan and Turkey. The theocrats will have their backs against the wall by lunchtime. Say, is Ceaucescu a verb yet? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Content Suitable for Political Junkies PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 12:04:58 PM ----- BODY: Content Suitable for Political Junkies Only We never got to see the real Reagan, and he's gone now. Unfortunately, we saw all too much of the real Clinton. President GW Bush is stage-managed as well as Reagan, but with his... interesting past, he's probably, well, a lot more interesting in real life than Clinton. Which is why I'm eager to see this film by NBC producer (and Congresswoman's daughter) Alexandra Pelosi. Bush apparently took a liking to her and her HandyCam during the 2000 race, so she got a look at Bush without Mike Deav...oops! without Carl Rove there to take care of the look and the message. No word yet on when or where the documentary will be released, but I'll keep an eye out for you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Airport Security Joke #1,000,006 Theives PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 12:08:49 PM ----- BODY: Airport Security Joke #1,000,006 Theives made off with six million bucks from Heathrow Airport. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: NATO Can't Even Make the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 12:37:31 PM ----- BODY: NATO Can't Even Make the Trains Run on Time The call grows amongst the bloggers to kill NATO. First Steven Den Best and now Sean McCray. These guys run two of my favorite blogs, so I hate to disagree with them, but... NATO is still (marginally) useful. And, while this may be anathema amongst libertarians, we ought to stay in NATO for some of the same reasons we need to keep the UN around. Let's look at the UN first. The UN is like your nosy next door neighbor. She's the do-gooder type who always meddles in business that's no affair of hers. She gossips, she pries, she fusses. Oh, and she's almost always wrong. She tells you your roof shingles aren't quite perfect -- but her yard is nothing but crabgrass, her house hasn't seen fresh paint in a double decade, and her windows are cracked. And at Halloween, she's the one person who hands out trail mix and pennies instead of Snickers. Also, she wastes billions of dollars every single year and her diplomats get all the good parking in Manhattan. (OK, so I kinda lost the metaphor there at the end.) Nevertheless, we should keep the UN. We live in a world that is horribly scarred by two world wars and a century of Holocaust, ethnic cleansing, tribal violence, terrorism, Cold War, nuclear proliferation, etc. Because of all that nastiness, the world sometimes demands the appearence of multilateralism. Clinton was no Napolean (well, maybe a Napolean III), but that doesn't mean the rest of the planet would let him invade Scotland for no good reason and without some permission from the world at large. Now keep in mind, we only have to follow the UN multilateral script during non-vital wars, such as the one against Saddam ten years ago or defoliating France. But in the current war against Saddam, the world can get screwed -- we'll do what we have to. And the world knows it. But I digress. The UN has a few decent agencies, can do the peacekeeping after we win the war, and can give us political cover for the things we want to do but don't necessarily need to do. And NATO is no different. So why keep them both? Good question, I'm glad I thought of it. NATO is the rich, western, democratic subset of the UN. NATO, in other words, is made up of the UN members who actually count for something. (Yes, I'm leaving out Japan and Australia and others, but this is a simplified argument.) For truly European affiars, NATO is the cover we need, not the UN. Remember Kosovo? It was too small to spend our political capital at the UN, but too big to be left to France. Ergo, NATO. The fact that we had to do all the heavy lifting while Italy contributed little more than carping matters not one whit. And I've saved the clincher for last. North Atlantic Treaty anchors Germany to the West. During the Cold War, US V and VII Corps weren't in West Germany just to keep the Russians out, they were also there to keep the Germans in. We seem to remember that less and less as the Greatest Generation dies off. But without a strong US presense in the center of Europe, someone is going to fill that vaccum -- and we've already been down that road twice before. It's either going to be us or the Germans -- and I choose us. Let's not dump NATO just yet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Wish Him Well Web PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 05:28:48 PM ----- BODY: We Wish Him Well Web publishing is losing one of its real pioneers. Michael Kinsley announced today that he is stepping down as editor of Slate magazine. Kinlsey was hired away from CNN in 1995, and he made then almost unheard move from Washington, DC to Washington state. Many of the magazine's features have become staples of the blogospere and the web as a whole. I appreciate his work, even on Crossfire, because Kinsley is never (well, almost never) a knee-jerk left-liberal. I hope Slate can keep innovating without him. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But the Iranians Can Probably PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 05:49:20 PM ----- BODY: But the Iranians Can Probably Do the Job Themselves Japan, humiliated by Perry's warships, embraced the Meiji restoration and created the first Western-style empire with an Asian capital. Following the bloody four-year stalemate in France, losing the First World War radicalized the German General Staff -- so much so, they invented the Blitzkrieg and swept through France in six weeks. Having left Vietnam more or less in disgrace, the US Army adopted a long series of reforms, in both training and doctrine, culminating in the 100-hour victory over Iraq. Winners think they'll keep on winning, but bad losses can lead to real restructuring. In the case of Germany and Japan, reform just made them more efficient conquerors -- until a second round of losses forced them to plant both feet firmly in the West. The Arab world has suffered a long string of defeats at the Western hands of Israel. Now, that could be excused by "Jewish trickery" or some such nonsense. But they're most likely about to face a long series of completely disasterous losses. Regime-changing, revolutionary losses -- the kind Israel couldn't inflict for political reasons. But the US can and may and probably will do just that. In Iraq for sure, but also perhaps Syria and Sudan, Egypt and Saudi Arabia. Could these rebukes be the wake-up call the Arab world needs to stop blaming others for their problems and make some real reforms? Could total humiliation serve as the springboard for an Arab Renaissance? I wouldn't bet the mortgage, but it's certainly a nice thought. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Still No Letterman I've PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 06:28:16 PM ----- BODY: He's Still No Letterman I've been entirely too serious today, but I'm not finding much to make fun of in the news this evening. So, here's a greatest comedy hit from a week or two ago. Enjoy with a lovely after-dinner cocktail. At Least There Are No Jokes About Warren Christopher Wearing a Halston Dress Former Secretary of State Madeline "This ATM Machine Line is Another Munich!" Albright today criticized President Bush's foreign policy. She was at her most critital on Bush's lumping together of Iran, Iraq, and North Korea as terror-supporting states. "That's like saying bacon and eggs go together, or lumping together the Superbowl with football. Which, by the way, the Patriots will win in a blow-out. 106-3, probably." Albright when on to explain that "the situation in Iran is much more complicated." So much so, that she strained to come up with yet another Munich analogy. "If we encourage the people of Iran to rise up against their government, that would be like... um... giving Prague to Hitler. Somehow." The former SecState, wearing a slinky little Chanel number, urged Bush to turn Gitmo into a real-life "Real World," and release videotape of the detainees there because, "the international community thinks we have lost our minds." However, Albright was unclear whether she was referring to the country as a whole or to herself. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Will They Swap Wives, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 06:44:56 PM ----- BODY: But Will They Swap Wives, Too? Sean McCray has some suitably harsh words for Al Gore in 2004. Everybody has been jumping on this bandwagon, making Glenn Reynolds think Gore must have some good chance left, after all (That's why I like Glenn -- I do my investing counter-market, too). All this leads me to today's Stupid Bar Bet: The Dem ticket in 2004? Lieberman/Gore. Hey, Gore was a good vice president the first time around. He went to all the right meetings, traveled to all the right funerals, served as the butt of all the right jokes -- he's a natural. And Lieberman is MUCH more likeable than Weird Al at the top of the ticket. Who's yer alpha male now, Al? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Costas Sure Has Nice PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 07:34:27 PM ----- BODY: But Costas Sure Has Nice Teeth Junk Yard Blog had some lovely words about the Olympics yesterday -- and a well-reasoned trashing of NBC's coverage of the Games. I covered the same ground this morning, just not nearly as well. Bryan made a point I'd missed, concerning Bob Costas ruining the entry of the WTC American flag into the stadium. Now, Bob Costas is the smartest man on television. Unfortunately, he knows this. So we'll never get him to shut up. FULL DISCLOSURE: I like Costas because we're both St. Louis boys, we both got our starts at KMOX (although I was a mere intern), and we both think we know everything. Bob ended up with the better media career, but I still have better hair. I only pick on him because I have no TV shows and he has, at last count, all of them. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Mentioning Natalija Radic and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 09:04:55 PM ----- BODY: But Mentioning Natalija Radic and Porn Still Gets More Hits If she keeps being this fun and amusing, I'm going to have to permalink Hawk Girl. As a relative newcomer, Emily Jones might not be a charter member of the Bellicose Women's Brigade, but she's certainly the most gung-ho junior officer. A Raised Glass Salute to Give War a Chance! Ed. Note: It took me over an hour to post this. What's wrong with Blogger tonight? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Did Come out in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 09:44:33 PM ----- BODY: He Did Come out in Favor of Tooth Decay and the Argentine Banking Crisis Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle has apparently abandoned his political strategy of praising President Bush's war strategy while slamming him at home. He has also, apparently, abandoned any further political ambitions. In this AP story, Daschle came out against Bush's labeling of Iraq, Iran, and North Korea as an Axis of Evil. With Bush's war numbers in the stratosphere and the American public willing to pursue the War, Dashcle's comments were about as politically inept as coming out against Santa Claus and non-Oval Office oral sex. Daschle may be good at bringing home the bacon, but even so, how long will his Red State voters in South Dakota be willing to put up with him? This could be an interesting show come November. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Call Tom Daschle now PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/11/2002 11:54:37 PM ----- BODY: Last Call Tom Daschle now says he supports the war effort "1000%." Well, we know from his economic speech in December that he can't do math, but that sounds like an awful lot more than is actually possible. Especially when he doesn't. At the same time he claimed that 1000%, he also stated Bush was "wrong" about the Axis of Evil. Which is it, Tom? Do you support the President or is he wrong? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Once again, Blogger has eaten PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 12:32:09 AM ----- BODY: Once again, Blogger has eaten my code. Stacy will be working on it ASAP. Meantime, sorry about the bad story links. As Sherman said, "War is Blogger." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Would Like to Go PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 10:29:48 AM ----- BODY: He Would Like to Go Further out on a Limb and Also Predict There Will be Commercials The Oscar nominations are out, and you know what that means -- it's time for VodkaPundit's Annual Oscar Race Prediction. (Drumroll, please) The show will go on too long, will feature some really bad songs, and few of the winners will have actually deserved it. Thank you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Another Good Answer is "I'm PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 10:33:02 AM ----- BODY: Another Good Answer is "I'm Too Drunk to Remember" Ken Lay pleaded his Fifth Amendment protection against self-incrimination in tesitmony before Congress today. Since this whole Enron thing blew up, collapsed, choose your own over-used metaphor, Ken Lay has pleaded the Fifth and I've started drinking more fifths. As Les Nesman asked: "Coincidence? I wonder." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Chinese Symbol for "Crisis" PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 10:51:58 AM ----- BODY: The Chinese Symbol for "Crisis" is Actually Two Words -- "Oh Shit" The Washington Times (motto: "The Next Newspaper of Record") reports that China is furthering its crackdown against religious groups. Coming just days before born-again Christian President Bush visits, you have to wonder what the butchers of Beijing are thinking. Perhaps the Party thinks a strong show of force will convince the new -- and certainly young by Chinese standards -- US President of their strength. If there's one thing we learned dealing with the Soviets, it's that repression is the first sign of weakness, not strength. Any regime that feels the need to beat, arrest, torture, and imprison its people just because they don't pray in an officially-sanctioned manner is not, by definition, a strong regime. If the ChiComms can't weather a few Christians, how are they going to last under the openess and legal rigors of WTO membership? I'm not religious, but I know the power of religion in the face of tyranny. Or maybe the crackdown is like Reagan's Moscow summit with Gorbachev in 1986. Just three years before the Fall of the Wall, Moscow was in bad shape -- and looked it. So Soviet Planners, always quite thorough, figured out beforehand each street Reagan would see -- and then re-paved and re-painted all along each route. Wherever Reagan traveled, Moscow looked good. It's no coincidence that "Potemkin Village" is a Russian expression. Now the Chinese are heirs to the Communist throne, to mix metaphors. Is this crackdown a way to make sure Bush doesn't see any nasty dissent while he's in town? The Chinese are fooling only themselves, if that. While it doesn't make the papers, we know of the strikes and protests that occur quite often in China -- away from the media, away from the rich coastal cities. And I'm sure the Chinese don't beleive their own lies, either. They're just going through the motions of a dying regime. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: An Armed Society is a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 11:15:21 AM ----- BODY: An Armed Society is a Polite Society -- Eventually Anthony Swenson asks -- and answers -- the question, "when are you legally entitled in shooting someone?" Having read too much Heinlein myself, I probably have a, uh, more lenient definition than most DA's. So here is VodkaPundit's partial list of shooting offenses: Bringing infants to the movies (they'd be better off as orphans with parents that stupid) Failure to merge Failure to yield Failure to say "Bless you" (Dogma fans only) White wine with red meat Vegetarianism Openly admiring River Phoenix Berkeley Wanting to outlaw cigarettes and legalize pot Being a major-league blogger who never links me no matter how much good material I send over Thinking in platitudes As you can see, this list is far from complete. Use the little comments ("drinks") thing to add your own. This could be fun. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Next Week: A Twelve Step PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 11:49:11 AM ----- BODY: Next Week: A Twelve Step Program for People with Bad Taste Bitter Girl has a hysterical list of Daily Affirmations -- for the maladjusted. Mandatory reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Am I the Only One PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 12:04:11 PM ----- BODY: Am I the Only One Who Remembers the "Dueling Brandos" sketch? Dueling op-ed pieces in today's OpinionJournal. Thomas Bray argues that Enron's collapse may lead to Congress to "declare war on capitalism." Just under that, Brendan Miniter claims the hearing will generate nothing more than the usual hot air. Is it just me, or is OpinionJournal looking more like a blog? We'll send Jonah Goldberg to investigate. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Oh Goody! Peacekeeping! Stanley Kurtz PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 12:14:10 PM ----- BODY: Oh Goody! Peacekeeping! Stanley Kurtz nails it. And no, this isn't a continuation of the Blog Porn Wars. Over at NRO, Kurtz says the US is entering a time of "reluctant imperialism." The word "reluctant" perfectly captures almost all of our foreign adventures, from the Barbary Pirate War to the present day. Anyway, go read it already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Now for Some Shameless PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 12:26:03 PM ----- BODY: And Now for Some Shameless Self-Promotion Also at NRO, Michael Ledeen has a piece greatly expanding on my argument yesterday that the huge anti-US "protests" in Iran were a bad sign for the mullahs in charge of that theothugocracy. Ledeen makes a great point I'd missed wading through the breathless NYT coverage -- 300,000 protesters in Tehran is a low turn-out, believe it or not. Back in the early days of the revolution, the mullahs could get a million or more people out on the streets. Do I need to mention this as more evidence in favor of my Iran First strategy? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Should See What He PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 12:37:31 PM ----- BODY: You Should See What He Writes About Sites He Really Likes Jim Dunnigan is one of the smartest -- and most prescient -- military affairs writers working today. Which is what makes his new article on cyberwar so frightening. Ever thought of assassination by tampering with medical records? Dunnigan has. Or electronically draining bank accounts to make it look like the problem is with the bank's computers? Dunnigan is there already. Wiping vital goverment records? Yeah, Dunnigan again. Also, Austin Bay put together a good analysis of more "conventional" barbarian threats. Both pieces are worth your time. Scary stuff on Strategy Page -- one of the best and most overlooked blogs out there. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Yellow Chicken on a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 12:43:46 PM ----- BODY: A Yellow Chicken on a Field of White French international arms sales have reportedly dropped to an eight-year low. This is surprising, given the recently-demonstrated US military prowess. At a time like this, you would expect demand to skyrocket for weapons with built-in surrender flags. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Really Are Watching You PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 12:54:56 PM ----- BODY: They Really Are Watching You Here's a breath of fresh air -- something not about politics, the War, or other bloggers. Instead, get yourself over to Lavasoft and download the latest copy of Ad-Aware. This nifty little (less than a meg) program scans your computer for spy software. The stuff that gathers info on your web habits, feeds ads at you, eats up your bandwidth -- you can now get rid of it in just a couple of minutes. My new computer arrived only a week ago today, and even with my firewall software, two different bits of spyware had managed to install themselves on my system. Ad-Aware axed them. I'm even going to pay to register this shareware. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: At Braves Games, Why Not PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 02:02:24 PM ----- BODY: At Braves Games, Why Not Have a Bratwurst and Some of Those Little Nuts Ted Turner is at it again. Now he's comparing Bush to Caesar and calling the barbarian 9/11 killers "brave" and "a little nuts." Where do we even begin the jokes when Ted Turner uses the phrase "little nuts?" I could prattle off at least three Castration/Time-Warner buy-out jokes without breaking a sweat. Hell, even a Jane Fonda/Castration comment or two. No nuts, little nuts, not much difference. Then there's the obvious "little insane" way to go. But really, what's the point? Ted Turner has become enough of a joke all by himself. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Fishbarreling The Washington Post PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 02:07:49 PM ----- BODY: More Fishbarreling The Washington Post also reports that Reuters is cutting 200 jobs. But hey, one man's cruel firing is another man's beneficial restructuring. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Breaking News Pakistan police arrested PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 02:39:15 PM ----- BODY: Breaking News Pakistan police arrested a man who might be the "mastermind" behind the barbarian kidnapping of Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl. Go to the real news sites for details. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Having a World-Class Ass Helps, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/12/2002 04:23:01 PM ----- BODY: Having a World-Class Ass Helps, Too Time to do a little shopping with the VodkaFiancé, then Chinese and a movie -- so posts will be light tonight. Gentlemen, if you find a woman who likes action movies, marry her. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bear with Him Until the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 10:30:56 AM ----- BODY: Bear with Him Until the Coffee Kicks In When Thomas Friedman is right, he can be completely, dead-on, extremely, really quite very, goddamn right. What I'm trying to say here is, you might want to take a quick peek at his column if you haven't already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Did Somebody Say Something? Also, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 10:32:40 AM ----- BODY: Did Somebody Say Something? Also, I think Maureen Dowd wrote something, but it didn't seem worth the effort of linking. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Remember This One for the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 10:38:51 AM ----- BODY: Remember This One for the Water Cooler Michael Kelly gets it, too. I can't resist quoting this line for you: On the other hand, as the foreign minister might have noticed, the French may today enjoy springtime in Paris without the annoying sounds of jackboots all over the place, and the reason for that was the simple-minded determination of the British, the Russians and the Americans to fight the Nazis and to die by the millions, in order to make the world safe for, among other creatures, future French foreign ministers. OK, OK, just one more line: The "street" in any given Arab country consists of 278 state-sanctioned mullahs already preaching death to the Americans and the Jews, five state-controlled newspaper opinion columnists preaching ditto, 577,000 state security officers making sure nobody says anything to the contrary and 73 million people who would very much like to be living in New Jersey. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Next Bombshells Will Be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 11:01:29 AM ----- BODY: The Next Bombshells Will Be over Baghdad The Philly Inquirer drops a bombshell this morning, reporting that the Bush administration has come out of the closet with its decision to remove Saddam Hussein from power in Iraq. Let's think about that for half a sec. The President wakes up one morning and tells an aide to tell some newspaper that he's going to have a fellow head of state removed from office with military force. Cue Yakov Smirnoff: "What a country!" We haven't done anything like this since Nixon and Allende in 1973. And even that was supposed to be covert. Ed. Note: In researching this story (Googling to make sure I had Smirnoff spelled right) I discovered that Cold War relic comedian has his own theater in Branson, Missouri. I don't want to show too much Blue State snobbery here, but -- Yakov Smirnoff has his own damn theater? What a country, indeed. Anyway, back to the commentary. You might be asking how smart can it be to announce our intentions. Wouldn't it be better instead to simply strike without warning? Perhaps not. Put yourself in the cement shoes of Saddam for a moment. Bush I had you in the crosshairs but never squeezed the trigger. So you feel pretty damn invincible. The next Amercian president just wanted to ignore you, and you mostly let him, while quietly working on WMDs and supporting barbarian killers (my word choice instead of "terrorists," remember). You're fat, squirrely, and happy. Now along comes Bush II. Here's a man who brushed away an enemy regime in a inaccessable, inhospitable country in a matter of weeks. Then he casually announces, through a mere aide, that he's coming after you. Personally. What might that do to your decision-making process? How might you sleep? How long can you maintain your judgement while on constant alert? How long will your generals or security officers allow you to keep power or even live, knowing that association with you could mean their own deaths? A brilliant, brilliant move. And so simple, the French will never get it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: With Apologies in Advance to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 11:31:29 AM ----- BODY: With Apologies in Advance to Rod Dreher Former Vice President and Presidential "candidate" Al Gore emerged from his hole yesterday, didn't see his shadow, and started making foreign policy noises. "As far as I'm concerned, there really is something to be said for occasionally putting diplomacy aside and laying one's cards on the table. There is value in calling evil by its name," Gore told a Council on Foreign Relations audience Tuesday night in New York. Gore then added, "Did I mention that I, too, voted for Bush in 2000? I'm glad to call him my Alpha Male, and it was I who coined that whole 'axis of evil' line for his big speech." Gore chided the Bush team for its relationship to NATO countries, saying that America shows "impatience and disdain" for their views and military capabilities. "Really, shouldn't we wait until Germany and France and Italy develop their own high-tech weapons, then give them a chance to develop the proper training and doctrine for them, before brashly going off and fighting without them and the valuable carping they could contribute?" Gore further explained that with the Germans along, we'd have to pay more attention to environmental concerns, like protecting the forests of Afghanistan from stray bombs. "I told you already I voted for Bush, right?" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Story Was Vetted by PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 11:58:41 AM ----- BODY: This Story Was Vetted by the French Consolate Prior to Publication Helen Thomas, the only person whose continued animation is more shocking than Keith Richards, complains that while Bush has met four times with Israeli PM Ariel Sharon, he has yet to meet even once with PA Barbarian-in-Cheif Yasser Arafat. Here's some fun trivia for you: During the entire duration of WWII, Roosevelt met with British PM Winston Churchill on board a destroyer, in Casablanca, at Terhan -- and yet never once met with Mussulini. Can you imagine the effrontary? Roosevelt, the most powerful man in the world at that time, lavished attention on our closest ally while virtually ignoring the tinpot dictator of a small, weak country who was once silly enough to declare war on our ally. It's exactly this kind of short-sighted behavior that gives unilateralism a good name, and we can't have that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Could at Least Say PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 12:01:28 PM ----- BODY: He Could at Least Say the BBC Came In First I just got Googled for "TV+NAKED+ANCHORS+M1" and came in second. I don't know what to say to that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That Goes Double for Alec PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 12:14:20 PM ----- BODY: That Goes Double for Alec Baldwin If Robert Altman stays in this country, then the terrorists will have won. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Republican Guard Battalion Surrenders to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 02:22:07 PM ----- BODY: Republican Guard Battalion Surrenders to Guy Named Kenny Ken Adelman argues in the Washington Post today that winning a military victory in Iraq won't take the 100,000 to 200,000 combat troops that pessimists fear. He's right. VodkaPundit Bet: We take take Iraq with one heavy division or two armored cav regiments, one light division, and assorted special forces -- all supported by Air Force and Navy pilots. You read it here first. Two divisions worth of troops, compared to the nine we sent over in 1990-91. And that has less to do with the weaknesses in Saddam's armed forces than in the new force multipliers of ours. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Unlike Shays-Meehan, This Would Be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 03:04:15 PM ----- BODY: Unlike Shays-Meehan, This Would Be a Constitutional Reform I hate to do all this linking to NRO, but James Swan has a delightfully in-depth article on how NBC reporting is ruining enjoyment of the Winter Olympics. Sure, the Games themselves have plenty of problems, such as the apparent Axis of Effete Demi-Evil between French and Russian skating judges. (Full Disclosure: I have an international skating judge as a cousin, and a fiancé in the employ of the US Figure Skating Association.) The IOC is, as I said over a week ago, a hypocritical bunch of Swiss Alp-junketing pocket-liners. And most of the sports aren't sports at all -- they barely register as activites. But there is still some damn fine competition in some damn fine sports. The Games should be a joy to watch, and would be -- were it not for scandals at the home office (IOC) and a worthless PR department (NBC). How do we fix the Games? Any suggestions? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's that Michael Greene Guy PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 03:27:14 PM ----- BODY: It's that Michael Greene Guy Who Really Needs to Relax Two Permalinks that somehow didn't survive the switch to the new template are back in action. Raise your glass to Howard Fienberg's Kesher Talk and Kevin Holtsberry's Ideas, Etc. Kevin is one of those few religious Republicans who doesn't make my teeth itch, and Howard makes my Grandfather Green look like a seriously relaxed liberal Jew -- but both of them maintain damn fine blogs that are well worth your time. UPDATE: If the headline confuses you, skip down to the Drinks section under this post. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Maybe Michael Greene Was Offended PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 04:03:08 PM ----- BODY: Maybe Michael Greene Was Offended When I Made Fun of Yakov Smirnoff Suspected al Qaeda barbarian Sameer al-Hada did the world a favor and blew himself up today in San'a, Yemen. Asked for an official reaction, White House Spokesman Ari Fleischer said, "I suppose that's one less bomb we'll have to drop." Yemeni officials say they're looking forward now to being upgraded from the Axis of Mostly Harmless Yet Annoying to the Axis of Cooperating Under Duress. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Forgot to Mention to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 04:23:09 PM ----- BODY: We Forgot to Mention to Michael Greene That the Previous Post was Also Satire -- There Actually Is No Axis of Yippee-Kye-Ay Just when I think I'm funny, Dan at Happy Fun Pundit comes along with this. Best line: As we speak, thousands of Canadian troops are marching on Salt Lake City, prepared to deliver one of the most sternly worded letters Canadians have ever written. And if that letter doesn't have an effect, they will write an even angrier one, and they will sign it this time. Just click over and read it already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's a Record Day for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 04:32:24 PM ----- BODY: It's a Record Day for Permalinks I'm usually more dense than even I'm aware of (which comes as no surprise to regular readers), which is probably why it took me so long to discover Richard Bennet's Omphalos. This is one seriously good blog, and deserved a Raised Glass Salute and a permalink, just on the merits of his Blog Porn Wars Post alone. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Also Looking for Hot PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 05:04:44 PM ----- BODY: He's Also Looking for Hot Naked Britney Spears Videos Bob Coleman is an Illinois lawyer running for state Attorney General. He's also a very, very funny man. Courtesy of Brit Hume on Fox News and this Chicago Sun Times story, we learn that Coleman has one TV ad where an unhappy baby throws up on him, and another (my fave) where he attempts to speak in the native language of some of his constituents. And ends up telling them that his uncle's chicken is dancing in his underwear. If anyone can find downloadable video of either ad, please send me the link. I'll buy the next round. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Fun to be Right PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 05:31:07 PM ----- BODY: It's Fun to be Right Way back when this blog was young and fresh -- January 15, to be exact -- I wrote, "the Euro won't [last] for just one hard economic reason: Labor has to be exactly as mobile as a currency is widespread. Are unemployed Germans really going to move to Greece during a downturn in Germany, if Greece is where the jobs are?" It's happening already. Mired in recession, Germany is busting out of the 1997 Stabilty and Growth Pact, which was designed to keep eurozone countries from sinking the new currency by using too much red ink. Originally, some worried that chronic overspenders like Greece and Italy would break the euro's back. But it takes a real powerhouse to sink an entire continent -- as Germany did twice the last century. Only this time, the Germans might scar Europe simply because they refuse to trim down their cradle-to-beyond-the-grave welfare state. Bad news to be sure, but still beats the hell out of the Wehrmacht. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Some of My Best Friends PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/13/2002 08:25:04 PM ----- BODY: Some of My Best Friends Shoot Porn This link, courtesy of Joanne Jacobs, says that porn star Nina Hartley will lecture a Jewish group on sex. Allow me to quote: Rabbi Mark Blazer asked Hartley, who is Jewish, to speak as part of his congregation's adult education series after he met her through a mutual friend -- and later learned about her career as a porn star and sex educator. I think I speak for everyone when I say, Nina Hartley is Jewish? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Insert Your Own “Beauty and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:03:14 AM ----- BODY: Insert Your Own “Beauty and the Beast Policy” Joke Here Thanks to Daily Pundit for linking to this Israel National News Story. In a shocker for the ages, Yasser Arafat now admits that the Karin A freighter was, indeed, attempting to smuggle 50 tons of weapons into Palestine – a clear violation of both Oslo I and Oslo II. Arafat went on to add that he never personally knew of the smuggling beforehand, someone misinterpreted his orders to smuggle in candy, the whole thing was a just a big test for Israeli security, and the dog ate his homework. In a related story, Israeli PM Ariel Sharon announced his so-called “Pinocchio Policy.” From now on, every time Arafat lies, IDF tanks will move one inch closer to Arafat’s Ramallah headquarters. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Smaller, Cuter Iraq Call PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:08:12 AM ----- BODY: A Smaller, Cuter Iraq Call the cartographer – I don’t think there will be the same Iraq this time next year. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Mixed Metaphor – Hu is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:09:28 AM ----- BODY: Mixed Metaphor – Hu is Actually in the Bullpen, Bill Good, if earnest reporting from Bill Safire on China’s heir apparent, Hu Jintao. The good news is Hu is a trained engineer, therefore, unlike most Communist party hacks, he’s used to dealing with how reality really works. Bad news? Hu was the Party’s go-to guy for propaganda against the US after we accidentally bombed their Belgrade embassy in ’99. The worst news, back in ’89, he was the first regional boss to openly applaud Beijing’s student slaughter at Tiananmen Square. Best line on Hu: He is a Chinese Putin: sharp memory, agile loyalties, openly secretive. So he sounds like less of a hardliner, and more a man we can do business with. Frankly though, it’s a shame he’s not a Gorbachev – Hu, like much of the younger Chinese generation, might prove too much a nationalist to be reasonable on some issues. Worst pun: We all know Hu's on first. Ouch, Bill. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Another Raised Glass Salute Two PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:29:29 AM ----- BODY: Another Raised Glass Salute Two overdue permalinks to Junk Yard Blog and Hawk Girl. You'll find them alongside the usual suspects, down and to the left. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Overslept a Bit. Now, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:25:50 PM ----- BODY: We Overslept a Bit. Now, Back to Our Regular Posting Schedule Ken Lay: Innocent Bystander. I'd ask, "have they no shame?" but we know the answer already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But We Still Get to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:31:25 PM ----- BODY: But We Still Get to Keep Lady Liberty When Austin Bay writes and article called "French Hiss," you know you have to read it already. Side Note: I got locked in as a Dave Barry fan years and years ago, when he promised that if he were President, the cornerstone of his foreign policy would be playing pranks on France. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sometimes He Really Likes Being PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:46:03 PM ----- BODY: Sometimes He Really Likes Being Tedious It's Thursday, and that means George Will. Today he looks at the hypocrisy of politicans giving your money to pet causes because each is a "vital national interest." You know, like peanut growers -- if they loose money, then the terrorists win. Will gamely turns the argument into a stab at campaign finance "reform" with this: While Congress prepares to spend, every two years, a total of $34 billion of other people's money to cultivate the votes of just this one constituency, Congress wants to limit what Americans voluntarily can contribute to political causes. Read the whole thing. Quick Note: You may have noticed I'm virtually ignoring the whole campaign reform issue. It is, quite simply, an unconstitutional "reform." "Congress shall make no law," means that Congress shall make no law -- so what else needs to be said about it? And I'd hate to be as tedious as those endless high school essays for/against things like abortion and gun control. So I'm mostly ignoring it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Watch as the Amazing Pundini PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:53:06 PM ----- BODY: Watch as the Amazing Pundini Digs Himself Into Another Deep Hole! Natalija Radic in a Do Me Red dress over on Samizdata. Looks like I got my Valentine's Day gift a little early -- and it wasn't even from the VodkaFiance. Sorry, honey -- I really do have a thing for those brunettes. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Ask What the Natalija PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 12:56:04 PM ----- BODY: Don't Ask What the Natalija Pic Reminds Him Of That reminds me -- who do I have to start seriously sucking up to in order to get Posh Blogged at Samizdata? Sounds like a brand spankin' new project, and just in time for the weekend. But first, I'd better catch up on the laundry. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Gets Serious When He PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 01:03:08 PM ----- BODY: He Gets Serious When He Gets Mad As happens at least twice a year, libertarians are attacking conservatives over Lincoln and the Civil War. In a seriously over-caffeinated state last night, I jumped in with the following letter to Junk Yard Blog: Bryan, Here's a non-orthodox, small-l libertarians take on Lincoln, the South, and the Civil War. Legally, the South was correct on State's Rights -- and that, as we all should know, was the real reason for succession. But to have used that excuse to justify the continued existence of slavery? Unforgivable, inexcusable, hypocritical. The South arguing rights? The North had to fight, and the North had to win, and I'm very glad we did both. In that one small sense, Lincoln and George W Bush are alike. I might not care for their domestic programs, but one certainly proved to be the right man at the right time -- and the other one might just prove the same. Let me reiterate that first point. Slaveholders tried to make an argument based on rights? Say it out loud, and with great ingidnance. And, you can use that same line, slightly altered, on anyone trying to preserve their property at the costs of the rights of others. Give it some thought. A bottle of Stoli to the person who can come up with the best modern example of the same hypocracy. And no, I'm not kidding -- a real damn bottle. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Sure Look Pretty in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 01:06:21 PM ----- BODY: You Sure Look Pretty in that Silky Shirt, Boy The Washington Times on how to pick out figure skating costumes for men: Garishly theatrical, blindingly flamboyant, men's figure- skating costumes operate in a parallel, Las Vegas-like universe where cheese is commonplace, bad taste is the norm and most skaters stand just a rhinestone away from complete and utter sartorial catastrophe. Sadly, long gone are the days when a man could feel confident anywhere with a dark suit and a black fedora. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: What Was the Middle Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 01:15:09 PM ----- BODY: What Was the Middle Part Again? Steven Den Best has (as usual) a well-reasoned essaythis afternoon, this time on how to handle Iranian meddling when we finally do invade Iraq. We've been down this road before, kids. We tackle Iran, first. Or rather, we give a big push and let Iran tackle itself. Presto-changeo, a new ally -- or at least neutral -- in the campagn against Saddam. Say it with me: Iran first, then Iraq. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Brian Boitano -- the Mike PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 01:20:45 PM ----- BODY: Brian Boitano -- the Mike Tyson of the Skating World Michael Wilbon, one of the smarter guys opining on the sports scene these days, has this to say about the Figure Skatingization of the Winter Olympics. Wilbon in right -- skating is just like boxing, only without all the sweat and ear-biting. Although I hear a lot of both goes on backstage. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also, You Should Maybe Read PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 01:28:52 PM ----- BODY: Also, You Should Maybe Read Dr. Frank's Rant Today Do not do not do not miss Dr. Frank's rant today. There's now coffee all over my desk, and a burning sensation in both my nostrils. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Christians Killed MLK and JFK, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 01:37:19 PM ----- BODY: Christians Killed MLK and JFK, But Do We Get to Slaughter Them? Ian Dodge of Dodgeblog has a scary-yet-you-somehow-knew-that-already anecdote on modern, American anti-Semitism. Have these people no shame? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Can't Print What Georgia PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 02:06:22 PM ----- BODY: We Can't Print What Georgia Said The New York Post reports that AOL-Time Warner officials are having to distance themselves from some of Ted Turners remarks, which one vice president referred to as "a little nuts sometimes." After reading this story, the entire city of Atlanta replied, "And now you know how we feel." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Giant Boob Found in Nebraska PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 02:17:49 PM ----- BODY: Giant Boob Found in Nebraska Police Station The Independent reports that a severed penis was found at a car wash in Hastings, Nebraska. First of all, when you say you've found a penis, then the word "severed" becomes redundant. They do not just fall off. No, not even after a weekend like the VodkaFiance and I had a couple weeks ago. Second, the story says, "According to a press release from the Hastings police, there is no evidence to support that the body part was severed at the location where it was found." What kind of evidence would that be? A man holding his bloody crotch, running in circles, shouting "Where's my penis? I had it a second ago! Right here at the car wash where it just fell off!"? Third. Apparently sick of the word "penis," the story mostly uses the euphamism "body part." But you can be damn sure they put PENIS in big letters right up top in the headline. Fourth. The police are looking into the matter as possible evidence of a homicide. OK, Chief -- first, check the morgue for penisless bodies. Correction: MALE bodies sans dick. Then ask at the hospital for men admitted for penis re-attachment surgery, only they didn't have the penis with them at the time. Failing that, look for men walking really funny. Fifth. The next line is classic: "[The police captain] said, to his recollection, this is the first time a severed penis has been found in Hastings." To his recollection. You read that right. They might have found other severed, cut-off, non-attached penises (penii?) in Hastings, but he'd have to check his files before committing to that 100%. And the paper reports that without challenge, and with a straight face. Tell me again why traditional media are losing readers and watchers? I can't seem to recall. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Ever Tried a Martini without PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 02:32:59 PM ----- BODY: Ever Tried a Martini without Benefit of a Cigarette? I missed it yesterday, so I'll link it today. Walter Williams has a good bit on quotas over at JWR. Give it a read. The only thing I don't like about Williams is that, unlike yours truly, he's brave enough to keep on smoking. Damn, I miss my Camels. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Does He Keep Calling PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 02:39:05 PM ----- BODY: Why Does He Keep Calling it That? Also worth your time is The Economist's write-up of Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf. They start right off with the most important point: While Musharraf has been a good ally, his country can't be fully welcomed back into the world until it has settled both its past with the Taliban and its present with India. Thursdays give us George Will, a new issue of the Economist, and The Jack and Karen Show. Best weeknight there is. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Thought He Got it PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 02:54:25 PM ----- BODY: You Thought He Got it All out of His System with the Penis Story Even though it's not on tonight, it occurs to me that "Will & Grace" is now straighter than Olympic Figure Skating judging. Both my fiancé and cousin Brett are going to kill me for that one. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: There Is Not One Severed PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 03:09:46 PM ----- BODY: There Is Not One Severed Penis Joke in this Entire Post Note to James Taranto: There is no porn belt from which to dispatch. Hell, they rarely even bother with underwear. Frankly, I'm getting a bit tired of OJ's Best of the Web, and I might stop linking to it. Earlier, I caught them lifting material straight from our esteemed Sergeant Stryker -- something Sarge tells me has happened more than once. And as a Wall Street Journal publication, shouldn't BotW be more concerned with protecting free markets than with bashing Democrats? It gets a bit tiresome. I'm going to keep reading. Just perhaps not much longer. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Have You Ever Tried PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 04:06:05 PM ----- BODY: And Have You Ever Tried to Find a Decent Taco in Marsaille? Brenda Largent writes in with some keen observations on France (Motto: We surrendered already! Honest!) I'll excerpt a few tasty bits: They refuse to allow their language to grow with the influx of foreign influences (read English) - a stultifying language is a sure sign of cultural decay. The insular approach they are taking to perserve their culture will actually accelerate the rate of cultural decay they experience. Well put, Brenda. Whenever a society attempts to suppress harmless activities, whether word choice (France), pornography (U.S.), or prayer (China), then you know something is not right with that society. The worse the oppression, the more trouble they're in. So China is tottering, France is approaching useless, and we're pretty much all right. More: Due to their insular and disdainful behavior, they are no longer regarded as the center of the word for fashion, food, wine or philosophy - their only (former) claims to fame. They have nothing to offer except a whine! Brenda is right. When Stag's Leap can produce a Cabernet Sauvignon (try the '92 Cask 23, if you can find it) in Napa that's every bit as good as a Grand Cru Bordeaux, then what the hell use is France? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Gonna Finish that Salmon? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 04:11:29 PM ----- BODY: You Gonna Finish that Salmon? Suman Palit has a write-up of hunter-and fisherman-based habitat preservation that's not to be missed. I'm just sorry he missed mentioning the good people at Ducks Unlimited, who got the ball rolling on this before "environmentalism" was even a word. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Still, Give Him Credit for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 04:16:49 PM ----- BODY: Still, Give Him Credit for not Mentioning "Brest" in the France Story Thanks to Jackson Murphy for linking me on his Dispatches blog. First time I've seen it, and it's good reading. I'm not sure what I did to earn it, but those severed penis stories always get the links clicking. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: So What Can I Get PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 04:21:35 PM ----- BODY: So What Can I Get Away with in a Story about Natalija Radic? Howard Fineman does everything but break out Monica Lewinski's Presidential Kneepads in this Newsweek write-up of W. Somebody tell Kevin Holtsberry they're damn near doing porn on a family site. UPDATE: When did Shiloh link me, and when did my link to her disappear? Anyway -- thanks, Shi, and I've corrected the mistake. FURTHER UPDATE: Please, Hawk Girl -- call me Steve. LAST UPDATE: The actual link to the Fineman story was missing until just now. Oops. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Wouldn't Like Him When PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 04:59:39 PM ----- BODY: You Wouldn't Like Him When He's Angry When the president of the supposedly market-oriented Club for Growth attacks Tom Daschle for not supporting the pork-barrel "Stimulus Package," then it may be time to give up entirely on so-called conservatives. I expect the President to support economic lunacy like the stimulus package -- it makes people think he's "doing something" about the economy. In modern times, the press grants the President some sort of voodoo power to make the economy grow or shrink, and savages him when he doesn't utter the proper incantations. So W makes noises that wasting our money actually helps us. Meanwhile, from the sidelines, you and me and the groups we form urge the President to ignore the press and do what's right. He strokes the press, we give him cover. That's called politics, and it's how the game has been played since, approximately, ever ago. But goddamnit -- when a group that supposedly supports free markets actually makes the case for Washington bloat, then it's time for us small-l libertarians to shout down the damn business lobby, the Christian Rite, and the Drug Warriors, and take the Republican Party back from them in the name of Goldwater. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Of Course We Need Campaign-Finance PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 05:20:38 PM ----- BODY: Of Course We Need Campaign-Finance Reform -- Look at President Steve Forbes Sensible talk -- as always -- from Thomas Sowell on Enron, campaign-finance "reform," and why Washingtonians should have dogs. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Yet It's Somehow Funny when PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 05:28:10 PM ----- BODY: Yet It's Somehow Funny when VodkaPundit is Mean and Bitter When the byline is Jack Spencer, a national security expert at the Heritage Foundation, but the picture just to the right is Rosie O'Donnell, then it becomes really difficult to read the story without Coke coming out my nose. This kind of thing gave birth to the word "juxtaposition." Believe it or not, I used to find Rosie highly entertaining and really quite funny. She had a unique, sometimes brutal worldview. Then something changed; I don't know what. But she's become increasingly shrill and bitter the last few years. Maybe being the only gay or bi woman with a thing for Tom Cruise has something to do with it. I dunno. But until you get whatever the issue is settled, Rosie, please be quiet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hardly Any Mentions at all PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 06:07:38 PM ----- BODY: Hardly Any Mentions at all of the Severed Penis It took far less than 24 hours to get Googled on the Nina Hartley/Jewish Sex Lecture story. But now I'll be afraid to look at my link referrals tomorrow, for fear of how many will involve a severed penis. If I ever share her email address, ask the VodkaFiancé how things get around here when I find something new that tickles me. Better yet, just post your commiserations in the "Drinks" section. For reasons I cannot fathom, the otherwise sensible Melissa actually reads this blog. It must be love. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Insert Your Own Gearbox Joke PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 06:27:49 PM ----- BODY: Insert Your Own Gearbox Joke Here Trolling for hits would be wrong, so I'm just going to quote Matt Drudge verbatim here: "Britney In Panties." This links to a Reuters story on the 19-year-old ingénue's screen debut tomorrow. But hey, one man's teenager in panties is another man's... um... teenager in panties. Wow. That should have been an easy Reuters joke, but somehow my brain got stuck in the Teenager In Panties gear. Since about 1982. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Strange Considering for Dinner He PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/14/2002 08:43:01 PM ----- BODY: Strange Considering for Dinner He Had Moo Goo Gai Pan in Swahili I just got Googled with "iran, iranian, arabian girl porn," and I came in fourth. Did I mention it was a Portugese search? That does it - I've just got to stop looking. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Can Only Pray it PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:09:09 AM ----- BODY: We Can Only Pray it Doesn’t Go That Far Scientists in Texas have successfully cloned a kitty, an event which could eventually help lead to new human medicines and medical treatments. Ethicists, however, immediately voiced concerns that the same techniques could be used for more sinister purposes, such as a huge increase in the number of kitty-photo based web sites and blogs. This is a lone instance where maybe Congress really ought to pass a law. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Perfect I linked before to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:11:38 AM ----- BODY: Perfect I linked before to the 9/11 TV special CBS will air March 10, but there’s something new worth a mention. We already know the show will feature videotape by French filmmakers – no jokes this time; they were quite brave – who actually got inside the Twin Towers before they collapsed. What we didn’t know is the Oscar-winning actor, TriBeCa businessman, and native New Yorker Robert De Niro will host the show. As the headline says: Perfect. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Does That Mean He’d be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:18:23 AM ----- BODY: Does That Mean He’d be a Single Woman Again? I’d be remiss if I didn’t pair these links. First, try out Peggy Noonan’s OpinionJournal article on going to war with Iraq. Then try on Sgt. Stryker’s take on the same subject. See which fits better. For my money – forgetting for the moment that both links are free -- Sarge did the better job. Peggy Noonan gets paid many thousands of dollars for her excellent work. Stryker, and the rest of us bloggers, do it largely for the love of the game. The less I read the traditional media, the better informed I feel. Your thoughts? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And They Hog the Good PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:25:11 AM ----- BODY: And They Hog the Good Monkey Bars, Too Daniel Henninger on one of the reasons why I barely talk about Enron – the whole sordid subject is usually little more than a playground for every possible kind of nutcase with a political axe to grind. Check out the whole story. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If You're Looking for Snide, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:35:31 AM ----- BODY: If You're Looking for Snide, Keep Scrolling Looking over Thursday's numbers, let me attempt a very gracious Thank You. We didn't get that many more unique visitors than usual, but the repeat page views and the average time each of you spent reading this blog were both way above normal. Freakishly above normal. I don't know what it was I apparently did right, but I will try to keep doing it. So -- thank you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Charles in Charge It's Friday, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:45:37 AM ----- BODY: Charles in Charge It's Friday, kids, and you know what that means -- Krauthammer! Finally, someone (other than a blogger) talks sense about Enron. The key graph is this: But there is another story line that has been largely overlooked: the remarkable self-correcting capacity of that same free market. We now have dozens of members of Congress falling over each other to write new rules and regulations -- conflict-of-interest provisions, new accounting standards, etc. -- to prevent the next Enron. But it will be months, years, before any of this will take effect, and the market has already acted with a terrible swift sword. And that, my friends, is why us small-l libertarians must re-take the Republican party from the business interests who, in part, control it. Congress, even when well-intended, is still trying to come up with new toilet paper regulations while the rest of us have moved on to bidets. NOTE: Sorry, was that a bit graphic for so early in the day? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Let's Hope FTD has a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 01:19:42 AM ----- BODY: Let's Hope FTD has a UK Branch A little late for Valentine's Day, but that's my fault. Nevertheless, you really ought to read this touching little note Andrew Sullivan posted from his trip back home. MAJOR UPDATE: Sullivan hasn't just been composing little sweet nothings in Britain. He's also been writing the best stuff since before he discovered that Paul Krugman is a crapweasel. It takes a Brit to recognize an empire, he writes, and he seems to have found one. Now that we've had an accidental tourist, it seems we might have acquired an accidental empire. This is serious stuff, but written with that deft touch that makes me such a fan of Andrew's. Read it while your coffee is still hot. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Say It with Me Now: PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 01:45:24 AM ----- BODY: Say It with Me Now: "I Told You So" The headline reads: "'Axis' Speech Sarts Paying Off." Really, what more answer do the critics need? Well, I'm going to give them more answer, anyway. Had President Bush made the same speech on in late September, it would have been laughable. Imagine, smoke is still coming off the rubble in New York, the missing can't even be counted yet, and he's claiming we can kick ass halfway around the world. Saddam in Iraq and the mullahs in Iran would have stepped up operations against us and/or the Israelis after such seemingly hollow threats. Now, back to the present. Like swatting flies, the US toppled an enemy regime in a landlocked, inaccessable nation on the other side of the world in just a few short weeks. And did so on an improvised shoestring and with barely more casualties than might be expected in a peacetime excercise of the same scale. Suddenly, W's words carry more weight. And he applies that weight in a little speech called the State of the Union, with the whole world watching. And low and behold, both Iran and Iraq are at least trying to pretend to be cooperating with the US or at least the UN. Who woulda thunk it? Frankly -- most of us warbloggers have thunk it and said it for weeks and months now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We're Announcing the Start of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 10:46:28 AM ----- BODY: We're Announcing the Start of a New Hangover Cure Contest Nursing a wee bit of a hangover this morning, which might explain one or two of my post-midnight posts -- we get a little sappy and maudlin on the Remy. That's why we're supposed to stick with vodka while working. Anyway. The coffee is kicking in, so expect something decent soon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This is Progress? The World PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 11:03:11 AM ----- BODY: This is Progress? The World Tribune reports that three Israeli soldiers were killed yesterday when, for the first time, Palestinians succeeded in destroying their Merkava tank. I hate to say this, and I mean no disrespect to the fallen IDF soldiers -- but at least the Palestinians were attacking soldiers instead of civilians. UPDATE: Fred Lapides was kind enough to write in with the part of the story I missed. I'll just quote Fred's letter: Stephen: nice of you to want to minimize the terror attack upon the Israeli tank--how unusual. Soldiers rather than civilians--but in fact here is what you left out: "....The IDF Spokesman said that, before the mine explosion, a roadside bomb had been detonated and shots fired at a civilian convoy of cars and a bus between Netzarim and the Karni crossing linking the Gaza Strip and Israel. When emergency vehicles and a tank arrived, the tank ran over a "very sophisticated anti-armor device," a military source said. The tank crew was driving along a dirt side road when the mine detonated. The turret was blown off, pinning one of the soldiers underneath the tank and setting it on fire, the spokesman said" In this instance, civilians did not die but were merely used as bait, though had the terrorists had their way, those on the bus would have been killed too. There you have it, kids. Even when attacking arguably legitimate targets, the barbarians of the West Bank can't help but use terror tactics. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Thoughts on the Blog PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 11:55:25 AM ----- BODY: Last Thoughts on the Blog Porn Wars This is adapted and expanded from a note I posted at Site-Essential.) I was born before the Baby Boomers all started getting hangovers. The product of an early Boomer mother and a Silent Generation father, I came into this world before the dawn of the '70s. And I think my fellow early GenXers might have been the last to have been raised in a world where the parents knew they had to be more grown up than the children. Look around you -- everything is baby-proof and child-friendly and family fun. Theme restaurants outnumber the dive bars. Disney cartoons on DVD outsell Magnolia. And while erotica is more mainstream than ever before, complaints against it almost always involve protecting "our children." Patriotism isn't the first refuge of the scoundrel -- "our children" are. In the '70s in my Midwestern boyhood home, it was always shown to me that the world was made for grown-ups. They did all the work, built all the cool stuff, and so if I wanted to play, I had to act grown up, too. If I wanted to act like a kid, there was always the back yard. Or on special occasions, Six Flags and Disneyland. But public places, whether the grocery store or a fine dinner out -- in those places I could either act properly and have some good times with the adults, or stay home and have kid fun with a sitter. My choice. Maybe memories just grow sweeter with time, but I do not remember eighteen screaming children running around like barbarians in decent restaurants in 1977. I'm sure I would remember, if only out of disdain for my peers. Too many of us have apparently forgotten that in order to turn children into adults, you have to give them some sort of reason to want to. I can't wait until I'm married this summer and we can start working on that first baby. But I'm afraid proper parenting is going to be even more difficult now than ever -- because in addition to the usual job of having to always set a good example, Melissa and I will be constantly fighting all the bad examples our children will see. We baby-proof the world, then wonder why there are so many people stuck in adolescence. It is not normal or acceptable for children to run and scream in office lobbies or shopping malls or restaurants. It is not normal or acceptable to encourage children, if only by implication, that the world is theirs. It isn't. It is ours -- the grown-ups. Let's start acting like it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How Soon Before the Hate PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:02:10 PM ----- BODY: How Soon Before the Hate Mail from the Prior Essay Starts? You need to read Jack Kelly's column today. Hell, just bookmark JWR and make it a regular stop. UPDATE: If you do bookmark JWR, you are officially encouraged to ingore the hell out of Cal Thomas. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Not Another Milk-Out-the-Nose Joke! Victor PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:09:13 PM ----- BODY: Not Another Milk-Out-the-Nose Joke! Victor Davis Hanson proves again why he's the best paid webster on military affairs. Careful drinking while reading this piece. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Hate Mail Just Started. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:14:56 PM ----- BODY: The Hate Mail Just Started. Before I Get to that, Read This The Blue Button not only has a great angry rant against Tom Tomorrow and his ilk, but they gave yours truly a warm mention in the same breath they slammed Gary Bauer. I'll be smiling all the way upstairs to the coffe pot. UPDATE: I forgot earlier to link to my own thoughts on the murder-minded Mr. Tomorrow. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Porn Wars Over, We Enter PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:27:19 PM ----- BODY: Porn Wars Over, We Enter the Blog Evolution Wars An Open Letter to Kevin Holtsberry. Kevin, In an otherwise fine post, you make the fairly common mistake of confusing Evolution the Fact with Evolution the Theory. Evolution is the fact that lifeforms change over time. Unless the fossil record is God's Little Joke, then there is no disputing the fact of evolution. Now the theory... Like ANY branch of the natural sciences, there are competing theories as to how evolution works. Look at the physical sciences -- not only can no one agree how quantum mechanics work, there are maybe three people total who understand the fact of it at all. As for evolution, there is classic Darwinism, punctuated equilibrium, etc. -- competing theories to explain the observed fact. The scientific method is how we will eventually choose which (if any current) theory is correct. Creationism, however, is not a theory. It's not even a properly scientific critique. It is Biblical absolutism trying very desperately to wear an ill-fitting suit of scientific clothes. Its claims are easily disputed by the laziest paleontology undergrad. Signed, etc. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Very Little Hate Mail So PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 12:41:07 PM ----- BODY: Very Little Hate Mail So Far, But We'll Keep You Posted Another reason why Hawk Girl is the best new blogger for the month of February. Don't ask, just click. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If it's Not Afghan, it's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 01:12:12 PM ----- BODY: If it's Not Afghan, it's CRAP! David Boaz in NRO on the Afghanistan-Scotland connection. So obvious, only a Scotsman could see it! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Not Kidding Dave Shiflett PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 01:25:18 PM ----- BODY: He's Not Kidding Dave Shiflett on OJ's Taste Page makes fun of some of the "sports" now deemed medal-worthy in the Winter Olympics. Hell, I think we all have. News to me in the story is that Warren Buffett (yes, that Warren Buffett) is leading a group to get bridge (yes, the damn card game) entered as a medal event. I think that's a worthy goal, one I hold in high regard. Well, that is if in exchange for my support, Mr. Buffett will support my bid to form a vodka-drinking team. And I want to captain Team USA. Sure, the Russians will be favored to take the gold, but the doubters know little of my dedication to the sport. You see, drinking is already like an Olympic sport to me. To get good at it, every day you need to drink, drink, drink -- whether you're in the mood to or not. Let me tell you, kids: my liver is aleady in Olympic training condition. Bring on the Russians, bring on the Irish, bring'em all on. We'll drink'em all under the table. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That Goes Double for the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 03:01:14 PM ----- BODY: That Goes Double for the Belgians The New York Times reports that some of our NATO "allies" have actually offered to act like allies, and help us should we feel the "need" to use force against Saddam Hussein. And what, pray tell, could Europe offer us? Perhaps France might offer us the use of one of their miniature armored "divisions" (about the same size and far less powerful than one regiment of US armored cavalry). Thanks, France -- I guess we'll have to provide the transport to get it there. And the food. And pretty much all the logistics, since you've abandoned your military like you abandoned the Ardennes. Maybe the Germans could offer us some help. For instance, they could stop harping on our foreign policy and start explaining the last "regime change" they tried in Iraq -- a pro-Nazi coup in 1941. In any case, post-war German logistic ability and expeditionary experience are (happily) even less than those of France. The Italians? If we somehow get routed by Saddam, perhaps they could offer us some sound advice on how to sound a retreat. Other than the Brits and the Turks -- the only two NATO allies we can count on -- the best thing our eurofriends can do to help is just to shut the hell up already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Because Trolling for Hits is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 03:09:57 PM ----- BODY: Because Trolling for Hits is Still Wrong Roger Ebert's review of Crossroads fails to mention even one time that star Britney Spears dances around in her panties and underwear teen girl sex. He only gave the new Britney Spears in her underwear movie one and a half stars, so I'm thinking he must've been in the bathroom or buying popcorn during the scene where Britney Spears dances around in her underwear bra panties hot naked coeds. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Battle of the Steves Good PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 03:38:44 PM ----- BODY: Battle of the Steves Good analysis by Steven Den Beste on how we may wage war on Iraq -- and why we may end up using a tactical nuke or two. However, I find him overly pessimistic. Iraqi command-and-control problems will be even worse this go-around than it was in 1991 -- they'll hardly know where their own formations are, much less ours. We're that good now at shutting off enemy communications. Furthermore, I think he overestimates how many combat troops we'll commit to the theater. This won't quite be a repeat of the Afghan campaign, but it will look more like than than the '91 war. Anyway, go read Steven's stuff. Whether you agree or not, it's certainly thought-provoking. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: In a Related Story, Rocket PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 04:03:06 PM ----- BODY: In a Related Story, Rocket Scientists Build Giant Flaming Phallic Symbols Beauty of Gray (a favorite of mine) links to this story from the SFGate. Aquatic researchers in Britain, trying to, ah, inspire celebate sharks to breed, are... I can't type this with the straight face. The scientists are playing Barry White albums at the damn fish. And now I've got this eerie medley going on in my head. It starts with John Williams' famous "Jaws" theme (duhdum, duuuhdum dudumdudumdudum) and then smoothly segues into "Can't Get Enough Of Your Love." Someone please, please shoot me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Following Post Brought to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 04:32:24 PM ----- BODY: The Following Post Brought to You by Symantec Software More genuinely scary cyberwar info on StrategyPage today. Read it, unless you're subject to losing sleep. And install a firewall on your computer already -- and keep it up-to-date. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Even Cheat at Figure PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 04:42:35 PM ----- BODY: They Even Cheat at Figure Skating This item also from StrategyPage: While the Afghan War has convinced France to buy more helicopters and form more special forces units, the French have decided against any increase in long-range strike or aerial tanker capability. My only conclusion is that all these new French special forces will either: A) Be used to force the occassional regime change in religiously-oppressed and terrorist-sponsoring Luxembourg, or; B) have to rely on American forces for transportation and logistics. The "allied" country that wouldn't let a few of our bombers fly over in 1986 expects us to escort their air assualt troops all over hell and gone. Fuck'em. Sometimes, I really don't understand what all the fuss was about when France pulled out of the NATO command structure in 1966. Seems like it would have had all the doomsday effects of Chad pulling out of the World Trade Organization. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Most Types of Sharks Have PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 04:52:02 PM ----- BODY: Most Types of Sharks Have Only Been Around 200 Million Years Juan Gato has a blog I'm just starting to get into -- and if his takedown of The Oldest Living Fossil is any indication of his usual work, I'll be making it a regular stop. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Friday -- He'll Drink PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/15/2002 05:14:58 PM ----- BODY: It's Friday -- He'll Drink to Most Anything Twenty-five posts so far today, and yet not one mention of the severed penis. I'll drink to that. UPDATE: We just got our first Google for "nebraska penis." I am filled with pride. Or something. FURTHER UPDATE: Thanks to some overly well-informed reader, I now know that under "car wash penis Nebraska" at Google, VodkaPundit is the third item. Scary. FINAL UPDATE: Latest Google search to hit this site? "figure+skating+rules+underwear." I don't want to know. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: My Valentine's Weekend is officially PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/17/2002 10:29:39 PM ----- BODY: My Valentine's Weekend is officially over -- I'm ba-ack! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If A = B and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 02:30:58 AM ----- BODY: If A = B and B = C then A and C Have Nothing to do with Each Other Western Civilization: Birthplace of Aristotle, father of reason. But sometimes, Germany doesn't listen so good. Editor of the German newsweekly Die Zeit has this to say in today's NYT: In June 1981, Israel's prime minister, Menachem Begin, ordered a posse of F-16 jets to take out Saddam Hussein's two nuclear reactors. With vast petroleum reserves, Iraq had no imaginable need for nuclear energy — except to make bombs. And Mr. Hussein had openly declared his intention to attack Israel. So far so good. For once, an honest assessment of Iraq's intentions and capabilities. He goes on: Publicly, Begin was scorned for his outrageous breach of international law. Privately, however, many politicians agreed: Why not destroy Iraq's potentially murderous nuclear toys? Mr. Hussein did go on to start two wars. But he lost both, and if he had been armed with nuclear bombs world history could have taken a very ugly turn. Wow! A European elite who is willing to face the truth about Iraq during both gulf wars. Fantabulous. However, while the man is dangerous and crazy, we do not know that he has weapons of mass destruction. He seems to have had precious little connection to Sept. 11. His army has been destroyed. Therefore, two decades after Begin's attack, America's European allies would deplore a repetition of the Persian Gulf war. HUH??? How did we go from "He was probably gonna get nukes and use them" to "Well, we don't, like, totally know for sure he has them, so let's sit on our lazy Euroasses and hope for the best"? At what university did Herr Nauman get a gentleman's C in logic 101? Or did he get his Master's in Non Sequitur? Look, Saddam is still a not nice guy. He's still trying to get nukes. We think we have a year or so before he has them. So, please, Euroelites, help us out the only way you can: Shut up already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Yet Another Reason not to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 02:33:25 AM ----- BODY: Yet Another Reason not to Whiz on the Electrice Fence On a much smarter note in today's NYT, read Bill Safire's column on the near-abolition of personal privacy anywhere outdoors in our nation's capital. Have we come to this already? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Also not too Fond PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 02:38:21 AM ----- BODY: He's Also not too Fond of White People Breathing In a move designed to removed any last bit of credibility he has with Americans of any color, shade, hue, or pattern, Louis Farrakhan has condemned the US war on terror. Claiming that we toppled a hostile government in a resource-free nation then let them establish their own government was based on "US oil politics," the Nation of Islam leader... Aw, hell. I can't do any satire here. It's already done. Just read the story and try to laugh instead of cry. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Lab Assignment: Turn Your PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 02:45:11 AM ----- BODY: Today's Lab Assignment: Turn Your Head and Cough UC Berkeley has suspended an entire male sexuality class after the professor allegedly had sex on stage and started an after-school orgy as some sort of extracurricular activity. First off, we should not be surprised this happened in Berkeley. In fact, I'm a bit amazed that the home of the Naked Guy didn't see this one happening (you thought I was going to say "coming") a long time ago. Secondly, why the hell does anyone bother teaching male sexuality? We men are simple creatures: Apply friction, repeat until sticky. Really, anything more is just to impress the ladies -- so that they'll help us with the friction part. Class dismissed. NOTE: It took great strength of will not to make a "crack their books" joke. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Could be Big Iran PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 02:50:11 AM ----- BODY: This Could be Big Iran might have al Qaeda's number two guy in custody. No Robert Wagner jokes, just read the story. If they hand him over, then maybe, just maybe, we won't have to help the good people of Iran to topple the theothugocracy. But we ought to anyway, just on principle. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Sorry He Even Mentioned PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 10:51:43 AM ----- BODY: He's Sorry He Even Mentioned It In sadder news, the trial of the woman who drowned her five children starts today in Houston. What do you do in a case like this? All your options are horrible. But -- the first job of any culture has to be to punish those who would kill children. Anything else is ultimately self-genocidal. So I'm just going to pour another cup of coffee and thank Whomever that I don't have jury duty in Texas. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Coffee Gets You Out PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 11:00:32 AM ----- BODY: But Coffee Gets You Out of Bed I just found something better than my morning coffee -- today's Unablogger. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Ask, Just Read Settle PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 11:18:01 AM ----- BODY: Don't Ask, Just Read Settle into a comfy chair, get out your notebook, and put on your thinking cap -- Suman Palit's long-awaited post on the long history of India and Judaism is finally available. If it seems I'm not posting as much today, it's because I'm busy with Suman's piece. This is what the web can be, kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'll Get Mean Again After PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 11:28:28 AM ----- BODY: I'll Get Mean Again After the Fourth Cup of Coffee Read Andrew Olmstead's bit on military preparedness -- and why you aren't ready for combat just because your soldiers can speak in gender-neutralese. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And it Can Bring Two PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 11:56:15 AM ----- BODY: And it Can Bring Two (or More) People Closer Together Kevin Holstberry is back at it again -- this time predictably railing against Colin Powell's sensible comments about condoms, pregnancy and STDs. Says Kevin: "What we do is promote a culture that practically forces kids to see sex as the most important act of ones existencce; a activity that is central to ones being." I hate to break this to him, but dirty, dirty sex is one of the most important acts of our existence. After mere survival, the primary activity of life is to create more life, to extend itself, to keep going, to procreate. "A zygote is a gamete's way of making more gametes," wrote Heinlein, and good ol' R.A. said that might just be the meaning of the whole universe. Certainly, it's the about only order in the chaos with undeniable proof. That's the reason even we atheists scream "oh god" at the critical moment -- at orgasm, we are god, creating life from void, imposing structure on the formless. And you know what one of the best things about being human is? The central fact of our existence is so goddamn fun. UPDATE: Kevin was kind enough to reply in the Drinks section, but I need to add something more. Is it something more than just a strawman that the Christian right is setting up when they claim anyone against them is automatically for kids having sex at 12? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "General Sagan" -- Say it PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 12:04:46 PM ----- BODY: "General Sagan" -- Say it and Shudder Kesher Talk is back at last -- with great words about "know-nothings with medical degrees." Same, of course, goes for any Ivory Tower type who thinks he can run your life and mine because he went to a lot of school. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Monday Means Morbid! Remember the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 12:38:13 PM ----- BODY: Monday Means Morbid! Remember the old Monty Python movie theater announcement gag? I don't have my print edition handy, so I'll paraphrase from memory: "Management regrets to inform you that there will be no feature presentation tonight, as it eats into the profits." I watch and read about that crematorium in Georgia, and all I can think is they held the same attitude about running that giant furnace. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And You Thought we had PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 01:05:36 PM ----- BODY: And You Thought we had Problems How does Japan fix itself? Simple question, no easy answer. Hell, there might not be an answer. For the last decade or so, Japan Inc. has been caught in a deflationary spiral. For those not paying attention to the papers, that means the economy is in a vicious cycle. Business won’t borrow money to expand because prices (and profits) keep dropping. People don’t buy things because they know that prices are going to be even cheaper tomorrow. So business fires people, so there’s even less money to spend, so they have to cut prices more and… well, you get the picture. The Great Depression was a deflationary cycle, and it took WWII to get out of that. The whole cycle got started when the Japanese real estate bubble burst. Our tech bubble was pretty out of hand by 1999, but in 1990, downtown Tokyo had a book value greater than the Lower 48 states! A few small city blocks worth more than everything from San Diego, CA to Portland, ME. Madness. Well, the bubble burst just as soon as some cashed-strapped companies tried to get the yen for the book value. And that’s part of how Japan got into this mess. Making matters worse, Japanese banks are saddled with enough bad debt to make our early-‘90s S&L crises look tiny. Paul Krugman, back when he was still interesting and thoughtful (i.e., not working for the NYT), suggested the way out of deflation was to purposely inflate the economy. Let the Bank of Japan print too much money – prices would rise and people would have a reason to spend today instead of tomorrow. But there’s a serious problem with what seems to be a sound idea. Japan’s population looks much like Florida’s, albeit with far fewer Jews. Seriously, Japan has a lot of old people. Retirees. People living on their savings. First, inflation destroys savings by making each dollar worth less. That’s an unfair tax on the elderly unemployed. Secondly, old people already own their big TV and car and house – they just don’t spend as much money as people with kids and a mortgage. So, you’ve got a political system where reform is impossible, and a demographic problem where even if the economy was growing, there aren’t enough young people to keep it going up. So what’s the solution for Japan? Damned if I know. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Letters, We Get Letters Very PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 01:22:48 PM ----- BODY: Letters, We Get Letters Very Smart Reader Marc Webster writes in: I can't speculate as to how many of your posts are lubricated in this way [with vodka], but I do thank you for not offering up wishy-washy, caveat-laden posts scientifically designed to offend exactly no one. You're welcome, Marc. And thank you for some of the kindest words ever said for an offensive site. Then Marc asks: "But there is a problem: where's the vodka?" [Emphasis mine] Where is the vodka, indeed. OK, here's how I drink my various lubricants. VodkaPundit martini. Remove bottle of Stoli and five-ounce martini glass from freezer. Pour former into latter. Salud. Summer version: Replace Stoli with Absolut Mandarin. The David Special: Replace Absolut Mandarin with Absolut Citron. Repeat until walking like Frankenstein's monster. The Melissa: Four parts Coke & ice to one part Stoli Vanil. Now shake that thing. The Ouch: X shots of Kettle One, out of iced Russian-style heavy shot glasses. Chase with Fat Tire, if needed. You'll figure out the name in the morning. So what's your poison? UPDATE: For the uninitiated, Fat Tire is a Belgian-style amber brewed in Ft. Collins, CO. From its early days of achingly limited availability, you can now get it as far away as Rolla, MO. Maybe farther now, for all I know. Look for it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Interesting than Jonah's Dog! PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 01:51:52 PM ----- BODY: More Interesting than Jonah's Dog! Mandatory reading from NRO. It's the first of a series, so get that bookmark handy. Good reporting, good history, good analysis. And I hope some State Department pukes are reading James S. Robbins, because we're going to need his info on Iraqi tribal structure to help us run the place after Saddam is gone. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Break Away from Our PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 02:29:33 PM ----- BODY: We Break Away from Our Usual Bitching for an All-New Gripe Blogspot is free, and sometimes worth every penny. Yeah, my peevish little way of saying Blogger is down again. Just testing to see if I can post while I can't read. I want a big "Technical Difficulties Please Stand By" graphic that will somehow automatically post every time Blogger hits the skids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Or Do Pounds Sterling Still PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 03:03:44 PM ----- BODY: Or Do Pounds Sterling Still Make the Best Bribe? Two cheers for craven materialism by Perry de Havilland on Samizdata! Sure, freedom produces the Backstreet Boys, but it also gives us Hayek and Copeland and... oh, just go read Perry already. Good writing, and a point we small-l libertarians need to make as often, as forcefully, and as loudly as we are able. Ed. Note: I will continue sending traffic and praise Perry's way until he sees fit to Posh Blog link me. And then I will send even more. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Those Who Shall Link Ye, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 03:11:48 PM ----- BODY: Those Who Shall Link Ye, Shall Thee Link -- the Twelfth Commandment For those wondering where your permalinks are, let me just say I'm working on them. They are actually going to have some sort of organization, although I can't promise anything alphabetical. Details tonight. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'll Have My Martini in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 06:06:13 PM ----- BODY: I'll Have My Martini in the Doghouse, Please Just because Perry de Havilland asked so nicely, here is the VodkaFiance. Melissa has no clue -- yet -- that I'm trading out hot opera dress pictures for a better link. How deep am I in it this time, do you think?

Yes, I am a lucky man. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Knows "The Corner" Link PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 08:04:37 PM ----- BODY: He Knows "The Corner" Link Doesn't Work. It's for a Good Reason OK, the new Alcoholic Links Template is up and running. All the same links as before, plus some piping fresh new ones -- all arranged in a totally arbitrary fasion. Top Shelf, Hair o' the Dog, Luncheon Cordials, After Work Cocktails, Warned by the Bouncer, Suspected Teetotalers, Known Molson Drinkers, and Under the Table. Hair, Lunch, and After Work are all listed by the time of day I do the most reading there. Warned by the Bouncer -- well, those are our too funny, too loud, or too naked sites. Suspected Teetotalers are religious Republicans who I read anyway. Molson? We know who the Canadians are, and we're keeping an eye on you people. Under the Table = MIA. Come back, Natalie! Finally, Top Shelf explains itself. Cheers, skoal, l'chaim, salud, prosit! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Is That a Flask in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 08:26:58 PM ----- BODY: Is That a Flask in Your Pocket or Are You Just Happy to See Me? Samizdata's other Londoner, Brian Micklethwait, has some fine words on freedom and sport. Great work, Brian -- but no one has yet to explain to me just what the hell is going on in a cricket match. Although I do love any sport that breaks for tea. Any chance of getting a mint julep out on the lawn? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Awful Pat Benetar Reference PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/18/2002 08:43:07 PM ----- BODY: The Awful Pat Benetar Reference Doesn't Come Until the Very End I write a thoughtful critique on the near-bankruptcy of Japan, Inc., but the best responses from you today are all about beer and vodka. You even ignored the male sexuality post and my big thumbs up for teen sex. (OK, Kevin Holtsberry didn't ignore the teen sex, but he never seems to.) But back to the subject, if I ever had one. Oh, yes -- vodka. Marc Webster wrote back, this time with a few cocktail suggestions of his own -- some potent political mixes. I'm just going to quote Marc at length: I thought cocktails in honor of the blogosphere's favorite people could be cool. Ahem. The Fisk: 3 oz. rotgut Vodka (McCormick's?), 1 oz beer, dash of tabasco sauce. Disgusting, and a few of them leave you feeling like you've been set upon by an unruly mob. Also, like with the real Fisk, if someone likes them, you can bet they wouldn't be a good drinking partner. The Vedrine: Nothing, just complain to the bartender that everything he stocks is too "simple" and lacking in nuance or sophistication. The Herold: 2 Oz. Smirnoff, passed off as Stolichnaya Gold, Grey Goose, etc. You can talk all you want about how its rigorously filtered, cross-checked for quality, etc., but you're still guilty of hyperbole/wishful thinking. I don't know...I've had a few shots of vodka tonight, so this may seem incredibly stupid in a few hours. Brilliant, Marc! Keep drinking and maybe you'll think up a few more. Meantime, I'll ask VodkaPundit readers to suggest their own political drinks. Here's one of mine: The Glenn Reynolds: A large shot of coffee spiked with Jolt, espresso, and just enough Stoli to keep hands steady for 24-hour blogging. OK, kids -- your turn. Hit me with your best shot. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Three-Hanky Newspaper Story William PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 12:01:30 AM ----- BODY: A Three-Hanky Newspaper Story William McGurn. Today’s Opinion Journal. Just read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If He Were a Mobster, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 12:02:37 AM ----- BODY: If He Were a Mobster, He’d Be in Witness Protection Also from OJ, a nice little write-up on Bjorn Lomborg. In case the name doesn’t ring a bell, Lomborg is the Dane ecologist who accidentally proved that most ecologists are, to put it mildly, full of shit. You should pick up his book, The Skeptical Environmentalist, if you want some fun facts to throw in the faces of idiots. It’s been my bedside reading all week – a high recommendation for me. Anyway, read Bray’s piece this morning and decide for yourself. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I’ll Topple Yours if You PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 12:06:53 AM ----- BODY: I’ll Topple Yours if You Topple Mine I keep meaning to link to Bill Gertz’s stuff in the Washington Times, but I keep finding it too late. Not today! In his latest report, Gertz says that US intelligence agencies “have spotted scores of Iranian intelligence and military personnel deep inside Afghanistan working to destabilize the interim government.” How about we make the Mullahs a deal: For every government they try to topple, we get to try to topple one of theirs. Best part is, the good people of Iran have seen the light and will do most of the work themselves. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Fight When You Can PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 12:10:05 AM ----- BODY: Why Fight When You Can Have Both? As those of you paying close attention are aware, I’m a one-man tilting-at-windmills boycott of NRO’s The Corner. Until Jonah Goldberg admits that his monster is a blog, I won’t link, I won’t read, and I’ll keep poking fun. Then I get this nice note from Robert Bauer of HokiePundit: I don't know if you've noticed, but several of the people at The Corner have been saying that they've been "blogging" and that they're "bloggers." No word from the G-Man regarding his crypto-blog yet, but I'm sure it's only a matter of time. Please, Robert – keep me posted. I’ll be true to my word and start linking just as soon as Jonah is true to reality. Then Robert adds, “You should send VodkaFiancee up against Natalija Radic and drive Megan McArdle batty.” Ah, youth! Robert, never never never put two women up against each other. Trust my years of very naughty experience here. The women will conspire and the women will win – and we men lose. Every damn time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Link of Unintended Consequences PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 12:11:13 AM ----- BODY: The Link of Unintended Consequences VodkaPundit is #12 for “figure skating crotch shots” at Google-Yahoo. Damnit, the one cheap sex joke I haven’t made about the Olympics, and I still get nailed for it. Who searches for this stuff, anyway? Don't answer, I already know -- me in 1986 had there been a Google yet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also Featuring Insomnia! Blogger is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 10:20:31 AM ----- BODY: Also Featuring Insomnia! Blogger is down again, so I'm not sure you'll see this -- but here goes, anyway. For the balance of the week I'll be back in my cousin's store as he road trips it to SLC for Olympic hockey. Last minute thing, so I'm helping out again. Anyway, ancient computer with a slow connection -- so expect a greater-than-even-normal number of typos and an extra dollop of crankiness. It'll be a blast. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Who Here Served at Subic PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 11:07:41 AM ----- BODY: Who Here Served at Subic or Clark? I'm glad I caught this Andrew Sullivan post before entering into my twice-weekly ripping of Nicholas Kristof at the NYT. So what are we doing in the Philippines, and what is it we're trying to do there? If it really is just a PR trip, then the entire Bush Administration should be ashamed. Our soldiers are too valuable to be wasted and this war is too important for sidetracks. Answers, anyone? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Let's Please not Accuse the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 11:19:15 AM ----- BODY: Let's Please not Accuse the Brits of Being Europeans Martin Gross on the Washington Times Op-Ed page has an interesting take on the diplomatic divide between the US and Europe. Gross argues that ancient Europe is behaving like our rebellious child. America would love to cooperate with Europeans in eliminating evil dictators who threaten the West. But apparently, the Europeans are more interested in expressing adolescent rebellion than in fighting. Well said. The United States got to take a holiday from history during most of the 1990s. It was nice while it lasted, but 9/11 was an overly-loud wake-up call on why we can't just disengage from the world. Europe, not directly attacked, keeps hitting the snooze button. They, like us, won't get serious until they have to. Or will they even then? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Told You He's Cranky Today PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 11:32:22 AM ----- BODY: Told You He's Cranky Today We might get some sensible copyright law -- but only through the Supreme Court. Is there no constituency Congress won't get on its knees for? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Told You He's Cranky Today PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 11:32:22 AM ----- BODY: Told You He's Cranky Today We might get some sensible copyright law -- but only through the Supreme Court. Is there no constituency Congress won't get on its knees for? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Soon the Parrot Here Will PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 11:40:43 AM ----- BODY: Soon the Parrot Here Will Sound Like a Sailor, Too Using many bad words very, very loudly as Blogspot goes down for the second time today. Last time anything went down this hard twice on me, I'd bought the lobster and several cocktails. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's a Slow Day for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 11:47:01 AM ----- BODY: It's a Slow Day for Politics If you love movies, read this LA Times story. The classic '60s Cinerama Dome in LA is being refurbished, but with what many film buffs think is the wrong kind of screen. More interesting than I've made it sound. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It Would Have Been More PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 11:58:32 AM ----- BODY: It Would Have Been More Dignified Had the Judge Worn Clown Shoes Why we need military tribunals, exhibit #1,000,006. Any tinpot or even would-be dictator can turn any court into a sham -- all he needs is a stage and a chance to strut, as Slobodan Milosovich showed in World Court yesterday. Now, whether Slobo is just an especially good grandstander, or The Hague is just unable to run a court with some sort of dignity, is this sort of charade what we want to be involved in? Two word answer: Hell no. We'll deal with our war captives our way. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "Anything Free is Worth Less PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 12:38:21 PM ----- BODY: "Anything Free is Worth Less Than You Paid for It" It's official -- I'm shopping for a web host. Look for www.vodkapundit.com in the next week or two. Meantime, bear with me and Blogspot. UPDATE: Just as all the coffee and hustling and attempts a wit and sagacity start to build into real readership, Blogger goes and has a day like this. Please accept my apologies. FURTHER UPDATE: There was a Letterman Top Ten list ages ago -- least popular new car features. The one item I remember was "Intermittent Steering." Blogger is having a day like that. If anyone somehow manages to read this, please leave a note in the Drinks section recommending a good, fairly inexepensive web host. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Mastercard: It's Everywhere You Want PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 03:42:26 PM ----- BODY: Mastercard: It's Everywhere You Want to Invade Why Victor Davis Hanson is one of our national treasures: "Noam Chomsky and Susan Sontag are now as likely to be in the AARP as screaming in the campus quad." New computer: $3056 High speed web connection: $45/month Reading a line like that: Priceless. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: An Open Letter to Sarge PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/19/2002 09:51:54 PM ----- BODY: An Open Letter to Sarge Stryker Sarge, let me tell you a little story as it was told to me. Well, not to me. It was years ago, and Lawrence Fishburne was on Letterman promoting some movie or other, and told this to millions of viewers. Humor me here, you'll see the point. Just keep reading. You might not remember, but that was little Larry, barely a teen, on the river patrol boat in "Apocalypse Now." Don't beleive me? Read the credits. Anyway, they were shooting in the Philippines, and Larry really was just a kid, not old enough to drink -- not even back then. So one day when he's not on set, he goes to see a magic show. Some local PI magician with lots of smoke and mirrors and ladies cut in half and whatnot. And he's there with none other than Marlon Brando. Anyway, Lawrence is still young enough to be oohing and aahing over all the "illusions." Then, right after some trick or other, Brando leans right into his ear and says, "Kid, it's all a bunch of crap." I read your response to the latest from the Pentagon, and that story came to mind. It's all a bunch of crap, Sarge. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also, the Coffee Needs to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 10:13:35 AM ----- BODY: Also, the Coffee Needs to Kick In Finally have the cousin's ancient computer running and connected. Things will be so much nicer next week when I'm back to spending my days at home, working in my bathrobe. Thanks for your patience yesterday -- only 14 or 15 posts, but still lots of readers. That means a lot. OK, now it's time to go back to being cranky and obtuse. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also, the Coffee Needs to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 10:13:35 AM ----- BODY: Also, the Coffee Needs to Kick In Finally have the cousin's ancient computer running and connected. Things will be so much nicer next week when I'm back to spending my days at home, working in my bathrobe. Thanks for your patience yesterday -- only 14 or 15 posts, but still lots of readers. That means a lot. OK, now it's time to go back to being cranky and obtuse. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If You Outlaw Education, Only PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 10:24:31 AM ----- BODY: If You Outlaw Education, Only Outlaws will... oh, Never Mind Good news is, it's nice to help out family -- I really don't mind pitching in at the store. Bad news is, we have an important Supreme Court hearing today, and I have no CNN, Fox, MSNBC, anything here. So if anyone hears anything interesting about the questioning in the school vouchers case, click on the "drinks" below this post and tell me. I'm a Jeffersonian libertarian, so I support public education -- I don't think you can have a functioning republic for very long without it. I'm the product of a mix of public and private schools, and can't deny there are serious problems in need of serious attention seriously soon at our public schools. But I have mixed feelings about vouchers. I don't worry that public schools will lose money -- they don't and won't. I don't worry that public schools will lose support -- the ones who deserve it are already held in contempt. I worry about our private schools under vouchers. He who pays the Danegeld... What government financing doesn't eventually come with strings? If vouchers become widespread, how long before the US Department of Education has effective control of our private schools, too, and does to them what it's helped to do to our public schools? I shudder at the thought, and so should you. Anyway, will someone please keep me up-to-date on today's case? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Trying to Say He PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 10:31:38 AM ----- BODY: He's Trying to Say He Didn't Like It Spent six years in California. Hated it. Hated it. Can't wait until the whole stinkin' place falls into the ocean or (more likely) legislates itself out of existence. But I could move back there just to vote for this guy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Friedman Finally Untangles from Last PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 10:37:51 AM ----- BODY: Friedman Finally Untangles from Last Week's 69 with the Crown Prince I think it was Jonah Goldberg who came up with The Friedman Formula. The 90% that Thomas Friedman gets right is so right, that it really hurts how goddamn wrong he is about the remaining 10%. There's none of that 10% in his column today. Read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Got Lost in the Blogspot PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 10:45:52 AM ----- BODY: Got Lost in the Blogspot Confusion Yesterday Kevin, Melissa thanks you for your very kind words about her, and hopes you aren't in too much trouble with the Missus. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: What Other Body Parts Do PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 10:50:22 AM ----- BODY: What Other Body Parts Do They Check? Still playing catch-up here after yesterday's Physical Exhaustion Sleep-A-Thon, so I missed Douglas Tunrbull's excellent post on Blogging until just now. If you haven't read it yet, you really ought to. We won't put AOL Time Warner out of business, but in the wise words of one of our uberbloggers, we will always fact-check their asses. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Would Have Gotten Away PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 11:00:21 AM ----- BODY: He Would Have Gotten Away with it If Not for Those Meddling Kids Wise words from Swen Swenson on making abortion legal until the 75th trimester. Question: What is it about the Blogosphere that attracts so many Heinleinians? Is it just semi-professional crankery inspired by Jubal Harshaw? And if so, where's my swimming pool full of succulently supple secretaries? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Will She Notice the Camcorder PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 11:22:30 AM ----- BODY: Will She Notice the Camcorder "On" Light in the Dark? This post will show that I don't link to Perry de Havilland all the time just in hopes of getting better positioning for VodkaPundit. Brilliant work on the meta-context from which we get our most basic assumptions. Although I will be posting another hot pic of Melissa soon, Perry. Wink, wink, nudge nudge. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Next on the Ash-Heap of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 12:12:55 PM ----- BODY: Next on the Ash-Heap of History Why I'll support our President through this war, from the Washington Post: Bush took his campaign against state-sponsored terrorism to within 300 feet of North Korea, flying by helicopter to the Demilitarized Zone, the dividing line between the two Koreas, where combat-ready divisions and miles of razor wire mark the unfinished business of the Cold War. Touring a museum at the 151-mile border, Bush was shown axes North Koreans used to kill two American servicemen in 1976. "No wonder I think they're evil," he said, shaking his head. There you have it. A man willing to call things not just as he sees them, but as they are. And willing to follow through with the necessary actions. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It Really Is Only Wednesday PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 12:23:18 PM ----- BODY: It Really Is Only Wednesday Krauthammer publishes early this week, and with good reason. When you write something so in-their-faces brilliant, you can't sit on it until Friday. Here's the lede: America won the Cold War, pocketed Poland and Hungary and the Czech Republic as door prizes, then proceeded to pulverize Serbia and Afghanistan and, en passant, highlight Europe's irrelevance with a display of vast military superiority. Need I add that we did most of this during a decade when we pretty much ignored the world and refused to take much seriously? Imagine what we can accomplish now that we're paying attention again. Now go read the whole damn column. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Where's Waldo News Department In PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 12:35:08 PM ----- BODY: Where's Waldo News Department In a story most notable for its absence, former MADman James Schlessinger explains why Bush was right to give our six months notice on the ABM treaty. Other than a few screaming ninnies -- the usual suspects -- where's the outrage? Certainly not from Russia. Our "friends" in Europe even shut the hell up. Sound opinion, solid reporting, good reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All Decisions Are Totally Arbitrary PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 12:47:44 PM ----- BODY: All Decisions Are Totally Arbitrary and Mostly Meaningless Will Wilkinson is back, and insightful and incisive as ever. Re-bookmark him if you need to. I'll be adding him back to my links, soon as I get out of here this evening. The only question is: Is Will a Hair o' the Dog blog, or a Luncheon Cordial? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Europe Has Forgotten Moral Outrage PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 01:03:51 PM ----- BODY: Europe Has Forgotten Moral Outrage -- Except How to Cause It InstaPundit linked this story from the Irish Times. The Prof calls it "interesting," but I think a careful reading shows that a European reporter who lives in NYC still doesn't get it or get us. The tone of tolerating condescension is intolerably Eurolefty. The writer takes issue with her eurofriends and their opinion of us as barbarians out for revenge. But Elaine Lafferty's defense of her American friends is essentially, "Of course they are, but right now they think they have good reason to be." Sickening, Prof, not interesting. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Might as Well Compliment My PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 01:20:07 PM ----- BODY: Might as Well Compliment My Red, Curly Hair On yesterday's Blogspot fiasco, Ev writes, "We're back up after a hardware upgrade. It should improve performance and scalability. Thanks for your patience." I have no patience. I'm fresh out. Patience is for people with nothing better to do with their time. I like Blogger. I'm proud to be on Blogger. But I can't stay here, Ev. Yesterday was the straw that broke the camel's back -- and now you just ate one of my posts. Twist the blade, salt the earth, that hurt. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Juan Gato Talks, People Listen PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 01:46:19 PM ----- BODY: Juan Gato Talks, People Listen Juan, a good post is exactly as long as it needs to be. If this is how long your take-down of Michael Moore needed to be, then so be it! Don't worry about cutting the posts down to size, just keep cutting down the idiots. However, there is no cutting Moore down to size. Not without a total federal ban on Cheetohs. UPDATE: The original link was to the wrong story. The error has been corrected. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Like a Ford Focus, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 01:55:31 PM ----- BODY: It's Like a Ford Focus, but it Flies Interesting news item from Steven Cole on Strategy Page: A company called Aviation Technology Group Inc. has developed a new small fighter called Javelin. While it was intended for export, the company is now suggesting that it could be the perfect fighter for homeland defense. Equipped with an ejection seat, radar, spotlight, forward looking infrared radar, night vision systems, and a 7.62mm minigun, it could be bought for only $4 million and operated for a quarter of the cost of an F-16. This Javelin doesn't exactly sound state-of-the-art, but gold-plated air-superiority fighters are hardly what's needed for homeland defense against slow, fat jetliners. My question is the same as Sarge Stryker's from a couple months back -- where do we get the pilots and ground crews? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And a Hearty "Go to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 02:52:34 PM ----- BODY: And a Hearty "Go to Hell" to All My Readers in Kaliningrad Oblast, Too! My first hit (that I know of) from Belgium. I should be flattered, but with all the eurocrat nonsense we've had to listen to out of Brussels since 9/11, the only thing I can think of is an old Monty Python phrase: "Fat Belgian git." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: In the Corporate Jewels? This PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 03:22:26 PM ----- BODY: In the Corporate Jewels? This item, courtesy of Drudge, has me re-thinking my atheism. AOL Time-Warner stock closed down 10% today. AOL is to the web what GOSPLAN was to fashion. (You 30+ Cold Warriors will get the reference.) Time-Warner... well, other than HBO and some nice Time-Life jazz collections, is a company sorely in need of a swift kick to the crotch. Maybe they just got one. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's the Pot Calling the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 03:27:02 PM ----- BODY: That's the Pot Calling the Bridal Gown Black What do you want to bet the Egyptian Minister of Transportation denounces the US for being murderers? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Back Home and Will PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 05:27:41 PM ----- BODY: He's Back Home and Will Be Drinking Soon The following is the only thing that needs to be said about campaign finance "reform." Ever. "When the legislature controls what is bought and sold, the first thing to be bought and sold will be legislators." We all know that old saw, but let's add a CFR amendment to it. "Any attempt to regulate the buying and selling of legislators will meet with the same success as other attempts to rig markets." There, I think that covers it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's Two Cannibalism Jokes Just PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 05:36:16 PM ----- BODY: That's Two Cannibalism Jokes Just this Afternoon No such thing as superior cultures? This sad case of cannibalism from Nigeria disproves that left-liberal notion. For instance, our good Dr. Lecter would have made a tasty foie gras, not some simple pepper soup. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sure It's Great, But There PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 05:50:05 PM ----- BODY: Sure It's Great, But There Are Still No Cartoon Bunnies with Machine Guns Rejoice, fellow and sister GenXers! Ebert has declared Say Anything one of the "Great Movies." Odd he did that today, considering Melissa and I just watched High Fidelity again last night. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All Your Hate Are Belong PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 08:36:46 PM ----- BODY: All Your Hate Are Belong to Us! If Ken Layne didn't already steer you to this Tim Blair post, then let me do so. Caution: May lead to co-workers, spouses, and/or signifigant others wondering why you're howling madly at the computer. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Cheap Shot of the Evening PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 08:42:00 PM ----- BODY: Cheap Shot of the Evening Another headline from Drudge: "Utah Leads Nation in Antidepressant Use" And that happened for the same reason there are so many confused young men in Arab countries -- a few hundred guys out in the desert are hogging all the women. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: His Idea of Skiing is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 09:33:18 PM ----- BODY: His Idea of Skiing is to Sit in the Lounge with a Cocktail or Nine Grasshoppa is back from wherever, and so is off the "Under the Table" links list and now under "After Work Cocktails" where he belongs. But that still leaves the question, How long is Natalie going to be skiing? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Fun Messes from Blogger! PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 11:04:24 PM ----- BODY: More Fun Messes from Blogger! Blogspot is down again, now returning Internal Server Errors instead of my many beloved blogs. Love what you've done, Ev -- now cut it the hell out. Once again, look for yours truly on his own domain next week. And might I be so forward as to ask Sekimori to help me with the set-up? I still pay well, and in Micheal Graves stuff. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They're Like Minnesotans, Only Less PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/20/2002 11:39:50 PM ----- BODY: They're Like Minnesotans, Only Less Fierce An overdue link to David Janes and his Ranting and Roaring blog. You'll find David under "Known Molson Drinkers." Remember, we keep track of you shifty Canadians. Probably up to no good with your strange vowels and odd tribal customs. I'd put these links up sooner, only I'm not that organized. It's like chaos here, only without the structure. Seriously, David has a funny, thoughtful site, and you should check it out often. If I keep seeing stuff like this from north of the border, I might start admitting that Dave Foley isn't really American. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Think That’s Called a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 12:03:55 AM ----- BODY: I Think That’s Called a “Washington Around-the-World” Safire buries the lead -- so deep it's the last sentence of his Thursday column. Read: "Stop pretending [Enron and Global Crossing are] a political scandal and start dealing with the accounting and derivatives scandal." That's closer to the truth than you'll get from CNBC and certainly from CNN, but it's still not the story. The story is that a bunch of would-be crooks almost certainly committed fraud -- and the financial markets bankrupted their company for it, freeing up capital and employees for more profitable and beneficial companies. Now we can only hope that the courts will mete out the individual punishments (jail and fines) that the markets can't. Look, capitalism requires this two-part system. You need free markets so that people can pursue their dreams, and republican government to punish those whose dreams involve theft, fraud, or force – the three ways to deny the dreams of others. Let's call the two sides Money and Guns. Markets have the money, government has the guns. And, ideally, never the twain shall meet. Unfortunately, what we have today is a mixed system, where the guys with the Guns control a lot of what the guys with the Money do – regulation of the airwaves, of medicine, of manufacturing, of office space, etc. Naturally, the Money guys try to buy the Guns guys, sometimes to get out from under the regulations, sometimes to get their competitors legally crippled. I probably don’t have to tell you that nothing is more dangerous than when the two great powers collude. The greater the collusion, the less our freedoms. When Money and Guns are inseparable and indistinguishable, then freedom ends. In fact, a name was coined in Italy for that exact situation about 80 years ago. Mussolini sometimes called it "the corporate state," but you might better know it as Fascism. Enron and GC are being used by a cynical Congress to foist campaign finance reform on the nation. What CFR does is regulate further an already regulated market – the market for speech. In other words, to further meld Money and Guns control over how you or I make our political opinions known. Now, what part of “Congress shall make no law” they don’t understand is a mystery to me, but I gave up on the Congress or the courts paying much attention to the Constitution before my father was even born. 1938, to be exact. But back to the subject. By restricting the power you and I would have to speak if their Guns didn’t prevent us, they protect their own asses and jobs. And the Money guys increase their power because the fewer opportunities we have to express our opinions with our checkbooks and our advocacy, the more important their established newspapers and TV shows become. I’m privileged. I have the time, the energy, and the wherewithal to opine here on the web. For others, they’re too busy, or not inclined, or just not that good at expressing themselves. But they, and you, always have the option of giving some money to a candidate, or a PAC, or a party. CFR would place further restrictions on your freedom to do those things. It's a shame the Founders didn't erect a clearer wall of separation between economy and state. If they had, then we wouldn’t have to worry so much about the menacing offspring of Money and Guns in bed together. Since the Founders didn’t, it’s up to you to be a more responsible citizen. And one way you can do that is to always remember this: In evaluating a new law, ask yourself – would the law further co-mingle Money and Guns? Because if it does, then it will increase the political power of Money and the increase the money controlled by Guns. Which means you get screwed twice. And the best part? You get to pay for your own screwing with your own taxes. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Already One of Those PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 07:52:32 AM ----- BODY: It's Already One of Those Days My firewall ate Blogger. I wish I were kidding. Don't know how to fix this, other than disabling Norton. Anyone have any suggestions? While I work on that, you enjoy today's lovely essay below. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Already No Longer One PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 08:03:52 AM ----- BODY: It's Already No Longer One of Those Days Problem with Norton solved. Also, archeologists have located the Ark of the Covennnt and discovered the 13th Commandment: "Thou shalt not fiddle with thy Firewall whilst enjoying a lovely brandy." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But You're Still Not Free PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 08:16:15 AM ----- BODY: But You're Still Not Free to Leave Say what you will about Communists, but they always make us look good -- if only by setting the bar so low. The Washington Post reports that Chinese Top Whoop-Tee-Do, Jiang Zemin claimed -- right in front of the world press and President Bush -- that China "has freedom of religion." Zemin went on to say, "Since founding of the People's Republic of China, all our institutions, various versions, have provided for the freedom of religious belief." Yeah, the freedom to practice at a state-approved, -licensed, and -run church. The freedom to be beaten, arrested, and killed for meditating in public. The freedom to be martyred. But Zemin makes the same mistake Gorbachev made in the '80s. By paying lip service to freedom, he helps both to corrode and expose his regime. Time will tell for the butchers of Beijing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's a New High Horse; PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 08:24:37 AM ----- BODY: It's a New High Horse; Let Him Ride it a While Patrice Hill in the Washington Times does some excellent digging, finding the Clinton administration bending over at our expense for Enron. Excellent reporting, but that still isn't the story. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You're About to Read What PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 10:21:15 AM ----- BODY: You're About to Read What Happens When Posting Before Coffee AP wire from Drudge: Gumbo forces New Olreans International Airport to close. Man, and I thought I liked mine spicy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Married, Single, We Pretty Much PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 10:43:35 AM ----- BODY: Married, Single, We Pretty Much Hit on Them All Somehow I missed it yesterday, but Doctor Frank has some wise, funny words on being nice to lovely French women even when they're married, Brit appeasement in the '30s, and Euroweenies. And yes, it's somehow all tied together. Fun! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's a Man of Few PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 11:17:58 AM ----- BODY: He's a Man of Few Words, but Damn, the Turnover Never having made any sort of study of Special Forces, I never make any hard guesses as to how they might be used. It also puts me at a disadvantage in critiquing Part Four of James S. Robbins series on how to defeat Saddam. So I'll keep my review simple: Wow. Read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: High Horse, Hobby Horse, Whatever PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 11:53:24 AM ----- BODY: High Horse, Hobby Horse, Whatever I had my long-winded, semi-erudite, somewhat sage say on CFR this morning, but it turns out J Bowen beat me to the punch -- and funnier, too. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tim Blair May End Up PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 12:38:07 PM ----- BODY: Tim Blair May End Up Owing Me Many Grand for a Ring Melissa just dropped by the store on her lunch, and now has a new reason to re-think this whole marriage thing. I keep cackling and telling her to "put on disco music and dance for the killing!" ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Deadly Serious Business Israeli PM PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 02:27:59 PM ----- BODY: Deadly Serious Business Israeli PM Ariel Sharon announced his new not-quite-war/not-quite-peace plan for the Palestinian territories. Sharon isn't going for the "pull back and build a wall" strategy espoused by some, but close to it. The IDF will first set up "buffer zones" between Israeli and Palestinian communities, followed by the two-prong approach of "a ceasefire with complete Palestinian disarmament followed at some later time by a final drawing up of borders," according to the BBC. Read the full story here. The plan is messy, it won't satisfy the Arab populations -- but it's safer than capitulation and more reasonable than building a wall. So the question is, has Sharon found a middle way to provide enough security for his people that all-out war can be avoided until Arafat is gone and a settlement can be reached? Or, is he just delaying the inevitable and encouraging more terror attacks? I don't have the answer. What are your thoughts? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Nationalist and Socialist? Wasn't There PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 02:43:36 PM ----- BODY: Nationalist and Socialist? Wasn't There Once a German Party with a Name Like That? Do the Chinese not realize that if they don't stop sending missiles out to terrorist nations on rail cars and cargo ships, there might come a day when we have to send them some of our missiles by a more direct route? I'm not saying we should threaten Beijing. Certainly not so directly. I'm not saying I think things will ever deteriorate so far between our two countries. Their government won't/wouldn't last long enough for that. But I am saying that we live in a new world post 9/11, and if you want to be a civilized nation, you have to stop selling weapons of mass destruction -- or their delivery systems, you Chinese Communist Party idiots -- to barbarian enemies of civilization. This is an either/or situation. Communist regimes generally don't deal well with those, thinking that some clever rhetoric or dialectic or just good ol' propaganda can negate the negation. But no verbal trickery can close the gap between civilized and barbaric. They must choose one or the other. Should we someday find that a missile responsible for the death of our soldiers or the destruction of one of our landmarks bears the label "Made in China," then I will rest well, knowing the end is near for the CCP. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Shameless Self-Promotion? There's No Other PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 03:34:20 PM ----- BODY: Shameless Self-Promotion? There's No Other Kind A new edition of The Onion, funny as ever. "Americans Would Be Outraged If They Understood Enron Collapse" leads the pack of fresh stories. Fortunately, I already explained it all here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Moment of Silence, Please PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 04:19:42 PM ----- BODY: A Moment of Silence, Please If this is a clash of civilizations, then one of our soldiers has just been murdered by our barbarian enemies. The State Department confirms that Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl is dead. If Danny's murder stirs more of our press to join the battle against barbarians, madmen, religious intolerance and deceit, then his death will not have been in vain. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Am Not an Animal! PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 05:28:33 PM ----- BODY: I Am Not an Animal! I Am a... OK, I AM an Animal. But You Knew That A long but worthwhile post on Christianity, John Derrick-style, from Bellicose Woman Kathy Kinsley. Good reading for us nontheist-types, and you Thumpers ought to take a look at it, too. We can get along with you politically on some issues, but on others, you're truly medieval. Or primeval. Sometimelong-before-now-eval. Enough of my drivel. Go read Kathy already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Honor Them Twelve American soldiers PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 05:31:25 PM ----- BODY: Honor Them Twelve American soldiers feared dead after a helicopter crash in the Philippines. It's just been a shitty day for losing heros. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just a Bad News Day PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 06:44:42 PM ----- BODY: Just a Bad News Day Andrew Olmstead is a guy whose blog keeps proving itself smarter and better informed that this one -- not that that always means much. His latest proves it again. And since I don't feel like posting much tonight, I'm mostly going to provide links to other worthy blogs. We'll see if that changes after dinner and a cocktail. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: First the Pentagon It's a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 07:59:28 PM ----- BODY: First the Pentagon It's a worse day than I thought. This policy would make all of us complicit when the next Daniel Pearl is killed. Goddamn them. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Wow. I Mean, Wow. Michelle, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 09:47:48 PM ----- BODY: Wow. I Mean, Wow. Michelle, Bronze. Irina, Silver. And 16-year-old American dark horse Sarah Hughes takes the gold after a fiece and exciting competition. Say what you will about the bad judging, the silly "sports," and Salt Lake City -- nights like tonight are why I'll always watch the Olympics. UPDATE: Putting politics in its proper place. Post victory, pre-medal ceremony interview with Sarah: Interviewer: "Who was that on the cell phone?" Sarah: "Someone just handed it to me, I think it was a Congressman or something." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Just Fun to Type PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 11:04:45 PM ----- BODY: It's Just Fun to Type "Mental Masturbation" Thomas Sowell (why don't more bloggers link to his work?) on what was once George Washington's birthday, and the sad ignorance most Americans have of our country's history. Ayn Rand said she studied history to learn how we got here, and philosophy so we'd know where to go. Whether you agree with Rand's philosohpy or not -- and I have major issues with large portions of Objectivism -- I don't think it's arguable that philosophy ungrounded in the reality of the past is nothing more than mental masturbation. Certainly that has something to do with why most philosophy departments add a negative to the sum of human knowledge. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Thanks, Kids Yesterday was a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/21/2002 11:13:01 PM ----- BODY: Thanks, Kids Yesterday was a record-setting day for total page views, and today more individual readers visited VodkaPundit than ever before. After just seven weeks, we're on track for 18,000 hits for February. I know that's a mere fraction of what the big kids score in a single day, but you've all found your way here without a single mention, much less a link, from Andrew, Glenn, Virginia, Tim, or James. I figure that means I must be doing something right -- or at least entertaining. I'd like to think I amuse, but it's my hope that we're making each other think a little more, or at least a little harder. And I wouldn't be doing it without all the great responses in your emails and the "drinks" discussion areas that Seki set up for us here. Tomorrow is Friday -- let's shake some people up. UPDATE: Spoke too soon. Turns out we set records today for both total hits and unique visitors. Wow. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: An Open Letter to Pearl's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 12:04:41 AM ----- BODY: An Open Letter to Pearl's Murderers Do you fuckers think you scare us with your cowardice? Do you think your little butchery home movie will give us pause? Do you think any god, even a real Old Testament asshole of a god, could smile on slitting the throat of a husband, a son, father-to-be? You will not be brought to justice. You will not be read your rights. You will not receive POW status, nor a fair trial. Odds are, you’ll be turned in for money by someone you trust. Some small number of US dollars that wouldn’t pay one month’s mortgage on an average house in this country, but which is a fortune in yours. Your end will be swift, it will be merciless, and it will be without regret. But the only hate we feel will be a brief flicker at ourselves, for letting you make us so angry today. Then we’ll forgive ourselves the slip and get back to the business of keeping the good parts of the earth safe for civilization. That’s just one of the differences between us and you. We forgive, then build, and somewhere in between we’ll exact a little revenge. You hate, then kill, and then kill some more. But not for much longer. Danny Pearl’s family will never get him back. His unborn child will never meet its daddy. But we will regain our peace of mind, and soon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Is Dave Sure He Didn’t PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 08:50:00 AM ----- BODY: Is Dave Sure He Didn’t Mean St. Louis? Dave Barry, on the differences between Miami and Salt Lake City: “I come from Miami, where we NEVER obey traffic lights. Sometimes we shoot them.” ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: German Expressionist KitchenAid Ads? Even PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 10:22:23 AM ----- BODY: German Expressionist KitchenAid Ads? Even white guys haven't thought K-Mart was cool for a decade, if ever, and now Spike Lee is going to direct their TV spots? It really has been all downhill for Spike since "Do The Right Thing." Sad, just sad. Maybe later Jackson Pollack can do some radio spots for L.L.Bean. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Like Jerry Lewis Over PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 10:30:32 AM ----- BODY: They Like Jerry Lewis Over There, Too Jimmy Carter rips Bush's "Axis of Evil." Where do we start? Jimmy, Bush took down an entire enemy regime in a few weeks after the start of this war. Your peanut ass dithered for months over our hostages held in Iran, then screwed up the infiltration of just a couple helicopters. The Soviets invaded Afghanistan, and your response was to punish American athletes and farmers. W is arresting and damn well killing the perpetrators of 9/11. On your watch, the Soviets started adventures in Central America and all over Africa -- which you left unanswered. On Bush's watch, al Qaeda can't get a good night's sleep anywhere, because we're increasing our presence everywhere. W has ruined "progress" with North Korea, Iran, and Iraq, you say? Oh, right. I forgot -- you and your buddy Clinton got weapons inspectors back into Iraq, North Korea to stop exporting missiles, and a democratic regime in Iran. And poor dumb George just pissed all that away when he uttered three little words. Jimmy, might I suggest a Cheese Tour of France? Be sure to keep your mouth too full to talk. Incompetence is just a lamer form of evil, Mr. Carter. Don't make me go there. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sam Donaldson's New Book: "Hold PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 10:45:09 AM ----- BODY: Sam Donaldson's New Book: "Hold on There, Mr. Dictator!" Instead of the by-the-numbers reporting we usually get on summit-type, more-choreographed-than-deflowing-a-virigin, dual-world-leader press conferences, The Times (UK) has a funny look at the Bush-Jiang press... uh, encounter yesterday. Read it, and you'll see why I've changed my mind about the Chinese being ready for democracy. Well, at least not Mr. Jiang. I'm now convinced we would have won the Cold War ten years sooner had Brezhnev ever been forced to take questions from the White House press corps. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Maybe We Should Also Federalize PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 10:53:20 AM ----- BODY: Maybe We Should Also Federalize the State Department Fraud in the National Guard? Our security left wanting by people with low pay and bad hours? Sounds like we'd better federalize the Nati... oh, yeah. Oops. Never mind. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Heterodoxy Reigns at VodkaPundit Rich PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 11:05:58 AM ----- BODY: Heterodoxy Reigns at VodkaPundit Rich Lowry makes the point on today's NRO that Shays-Meehan will mostly harm the two main political parties, by legally forcing donations away from Dems and Reps and towards advocacy groups like the NRA and the NEA. That's a bad thing, kids. Having two main parties is generally good for freedom. Since splinter groups (such as my love them/hate them Libertarians) don't have a chance in our system, forcing big coalitions. Big coalitions mean I have to get along sometimes with Christian conservatives. And that means that the Republican party is too splintered to do anything much against abortion or in favor of churches. And with the Democrats, the Greens and DLC are forced to get along, preventing either of them from going too far. Freedom is protected by governmental intertia. Not always, not perfectly, but usually and generally. So when we harm parties and support smaller groups, we discourage that big-tent non-ideology which keeps all the factions in line. And so CFR would encourage the sort of parliamentary-style mess you see in Italy and Japan. Shays-Meehan is bad in all sorts of ways I hadn't thought of yet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Ask and Sometimes Ye PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 11:35:45 AM ----- BODY: Don't Ask and Sometimes Ye Shall Receive Anyway Yeah, we pick on journalists -- sometimes so much we forget what a noble profession journalism is. Daniel Pearl's murder should make us remember for a long time. Sort of related, the big increase in traffic this morning is due to a kind mention from Tim Blair. Thanks, Tim. Only I'm not sure just how controlled that fury was last night. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Really Need Steven Den PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 11:56:01 AM ----- BODY: We Really Need Steven Den Beste and Game Theory I'm not sure what to think about this one. The White House announced it's scrapping a decades-old policy pledging not to use nukes against non-nuclear nations. On the one hand, the old policy made a lot of sense. Since you can't nuke us, we won't nuke you -- which removes a possible motive for countries to want or feel they might need nuclear weapons. On the other hand, dictators wanting nukes is like 14-year-old boys wanting Britney Spears -- they're popular and temptingly, seemingly possible. Add to the mix that nukes aren't the only weapons of mass destruction -- and we DO promise to use nukes against anyone using chemicals or biologicals against us. Are we encouraging new nations to join the nuclear club, or are we just recognizing reality with this new policy? Discuss. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Because Gray is So Wishy-Washy PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 12:03:15 PM ----- BODY: Because Gray is So Wishy-Washy Also from the Washington Times (MOTTO: "The Red, White, and Blue Lady"), comes a report that the Administration wants Saddam out of power by 2005. Um... do we have anything more important on our platter taking up the next three years? 2005? I was hoping Special Forces would give Saddam's head on a platter to W for Christmas -- this year. Easter of next at the latest. Even optimists say we have maybe a year before Iraq has the Bomb. Waging an unpopular-with-Euroweenies war beats the hell out of trading mushroom clouds with a paranoid maniac. Let's get with the program. Or perhaps it's all disinformation. We'll know before it's over. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Not Hemingway, Because I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 12:16:57 PM ----- BODY: But Not Hemingway, Because I Can't Afford That Much Jack D Random Thought: One of these days, I'd like to sit down for a serious bullshit-and-whisky session with Robert Kaplan and Ralph Peters or even just listen in. Would be a helluva good talk. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Wasn't He "Master of the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 12:25:19 PM ----- BODY: Wasn't He "Master of the Slide Whistle"? Dan at Happy Fun Pundit does it again. I mean, how many gun control pieces can wedge in references to Enya and Zamfir? Twice as funny as Dennis Miller, and only half as cloying. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Easier If You Just PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 12:43:39 PM ----- BODY: It's Easier If You Just Do As He Says Michael Fumento, one of the best reasons to buy Reason, has a forceful, disturbing column on deceitful war reporting from the Washington Post. Read it, but not on an empty stomach. I tell myself Ben Bradlee would have had Molly Moore's head on a stake. And be sure to click on the Reason link above. I first subscribed in '94, during the Virginia Postrel heyday, and haven't missed an issue since. Twenty bucks gets you 11 issues of the best sensible-shoes libertarianism there is. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Taste of Kaplan's Bleak PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 12:52:23 PM ----- BODY: A Taste of Kaplan's Bleak Future, Coming to a Hemisphere Near You Either the Colombian Army wins this, and Colombia gets to muddle on as before -- only slightly more distracted and broke. Or they lose, and what's left of that sad country ceases to function as a nation-state all all. Put your money on the latter. Other than the big coastal cities and mineral deposits, Colombia is finished. Jive Miguel is in from Bogota. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Rappin' Granny Started the Slippery PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 01:26:31 PM ----- BODY: Rappin' Granny Started the Slippery Slope Courtesy Drudge: "Elderly Woman in Wheelchair Smuggled Ecstacy." Next thing you know, our old people will be mainlining Geratol and doing drive-bys from the Silver Key volunteer transport van. And she had almost 10,000 doses! Damn, all I ever got from my grannies was fresh fruit and hard candies. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If You Outlaw Hate Speech, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 01:28:53 PM ----- BODY: If You Outlaw Hate Speech, Then Only Hate Will Outlaw Speech Have. Or Something Europe has a plan to outlaw all hate speech. No word yet on punishments for the "crime," but you can be damn sure the law won't cover eurocrats trash-talking the US ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Thought It Was Worth PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 01:31:50 PM ----- BODY: Just Thought It Was Worth a Mention You probably don't need the link, but here it is, anyway. James S. Robbins has posted the fifth and final part of his series at NRO on toppling Saddam. NRO is having a good day. That's three links from here to there today, and I haven't even had a chance to bitch and moan about the G-File yet. Stay tuned. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Flattery Will Get You Anything PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 02:23:56 PM ----- BODY: Flattery Will Get You Anything To those -- apparently hundreds -- of you visiting VodkaPundit for the first time today after following Tim Blair's link, let me thank you. I'm seeing a big upsurge in unique visitors, and an even bigger increase in overall hits. That means you're clicking the links -- and coming back here for more. I won't try to guess if you're doing it out of pleasure or masochism. But while you're here, bookmark the site. What you see today is what you'll see here every week day. Thanks, and salud! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The They Still Don't Get PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 02:43:49 PM ----- BODY: The They Still Don't Get It Department I may be late finding this one, but here it is. Bill Gertz reports that China shipped off yet another collection of missiles to Iran. This time they got a nice little boat load of naval anti-air missiles. An old college buddy of mine flies F-18s for the Navy. His life just got a little bit cheaper, thanks to Iran's terrorism and China's complicity. What part of "with us or against us" do the tyrants in Beijing not understand? If they're that hard up for money, they can always sell us more pocket calculators or household tools and whatever else it is they're making these days -- we'll buy them gladly. But how long do they think the dollar tap will stay open, when they continue to arm those who would do us harm? Forget what Washington might do, Mr. Jiang, and think of what the US consumer might do. We are the lifeblood of your regime. Without our dollars, you can't prop up your debt-riddled banks or stave off the bankruptcy of your state-owned enterprises. Without us, you are a blot on the sidewalk under the feet of an angry mob. This is not a threat; our government has nothing to do with how many of your trinkets we buy. But we are united and we are pissed and we will defend our interests. Now put your little missiles back in your pants where they belong. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sharing the Wealth Let's send PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 02:53:07 PM ----- BODY: Sharing the Wealth Let's send some of you new people over to Sean McCray's Next Right for his excellent article on slavery reparations. I promise full restitution for every person of every color I have ever held in bondage. And get your mind back in the gutter -- that is exactly what I meant. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Cracking the Whip -- Not PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 03:06:57 PM ----- BODY: Cracking the Whip -- Not That We Suddenly Have a New Theme Here I certainly can't tell someone else what to write, especially when they already do it so well and for free. But let us all hope the blogosphere's Poet Laureate, Will Warren, is working on something appropriately moving for the family of Daniel Pearl. Just a thought, Will -- and I'm sure I'm at least a day behind you. UPDATE: I should know better than to try to give ideas to other bloggers. My last great suggestion was for Dan or Steve at Happy Fun Pundit to write a novelty song based on "At Long Last Ebola." I promise to stay on my prose barstool in the corner from now on, to use a really very awful metaphor. Prose barstool? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Read It Here First, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 03:19:05 PM ----- BODY: You Read It Here First, Kids Nothing to complain about in the G-File today -- except that Jonah stole my second-best rant from earlier today, then went and made it longer and with bigger words. Oh, and using little things like research and facts and stuff. Good reading. Check it out. Damn thief. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Special Notice If you think PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 03:26:02 PM ----- BODY: Special Notice If you think I'm being rude and ignoring my email, I'm really not. Just no access to my regular account until 5:30 Mountain Time. Bear with me. Or if the VodkaFiancée has been trying to write, then bare with me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Holy Shit No Way Department PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 03:33:22 PM ----- BODY: Holy Shit No Way Department My bad. I missed Ken Layne's very kind link and even kinder words about me last night. You read here often, Ken? I had no idea -- and I'm very deeply flattered. For all the bombast here, I hope you know that's sincere. First Ken, then Tim. I feel like I've been given an Oscar and Olympic Gold all in 24 hours. Once Glenn links, I'll have that Nobel Prize for Blogging. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: To Dream the Impossible Dreeaaaam PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 04:11:11 PM ----- BODY: To Dream the Impossible Dreeaaaam Found the link to this one on InstaPundit. The European Union wants to form a 100,000-man "rapid reaction corps," which would be the spear head for a heavier, 250,000-strong multinational corps capable of two years of sustained operations. Really. OK, kudos to the eurocrats for being realistic enough to make the spearhead mostly Brits -- at least they have an actual standing army with some actual combat power and power projection ability. But the rest? By the time the EU has studied all the issues from all the angles, studied the studies, reported back to the proper commissions in triplicate, filed the environmental paperwork, and apologized to the unions for whatever imagined offense the unions take from all this... well, by that time, human nature will have been perfected and there will be no more war. And you only think I'm kidding. We'll see the New Soviet Man made real before we see a multi-national EU field army capable of traveling thousands of miles and staying there for months on end. NOTICE: VodkaPundit makes this solemn vow -- no more singing headlines. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Is That a Bottle in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 05:59:37 PM ----- BODY: Is That a Bottle in Your Fly, Or Are You Just Happy to See Me? Taking a quick break from Olympic hockey to correct a serious omission. Will Wilkinson's Fly Bottle deserves some serious linkage, and has for longer than I've been around. You'll find him under After Work Cocktails -- because I need an entire day's worth of thinking before my brain is warmed up enough to handle one of the smartest blogs anywhere. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Caution: This Post Begins with PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 06:13:08 PM ----- BODY: Caution: This Post Begins with a Painfully Bad Pun Ebert gives "Queen of the Damned" a good rogering. Shame, too, because it sounds like the movie could have been campy fun. I gave up on Anne Rice about 10 pages into Memnoch the Devil. Poor woman started taking herself seriously and her readers for granted. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Jingoism Ahead Russia goes down, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 06:25:31 PM ----- BODY: Jingoism Ahead Russia goes down, 3-2. Not exactly the stuff miracles are made of, but exciting hockey. Olympic hockey gold will be between the US and Canada. Good thing Melissa works tomorrow night, because my skinny ass will be planted in front of the TV. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Wiley Strikes Again Missed this PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/22/2002 06:38:16 PM ----- BODY: Wiley Strikes Again Missed this Non Sequitur on Tuesday. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Didn't Mean to Obliterate PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/23/2002 11:36:58 AM ----- BODY: They Didn't Mean to Obliterate Seattle, Honest Bill Gertz again, this time with a report on Russian nuclear weapons and material "security" in today's Washtington Times. The usual scary stuff here, only with more detail than we usually get out of the Russian military. Gertz writes, "an unauthorized or accidental missile launch is 'highly unlikely' as long as the current safeguards are enforced and the central political authority exists." And now you know why I don't worry about Putin's sometimes heavy-handed ways. Until there are some real human institutions undergirding Russian society, they need a semi-authoritarian center. And a strong Moscow is safer for us, too. For a better explanation of why, go read Andrew Sullivan's Book Club for February. Or better yet, pick yourself up a copy of Robert Kaplan's The Coming Anarchy or Warrior Politics. I haven't read his Eastward to Tartary yet, but that's next on the bedside reading list. Kaplan makes excellent reading -- if you like scary peeks into the future. His fraternal twin in the world of fiction is the equally-excellent Ralph Peters. His novel Flames of Heaven is quite simply some of the finest literature of the '90s -- and sadly out of print. Worth the hunt for a used copy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's All, Folks Chuck Jones PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/23/2002 11:49:42 AM ----- BODY: That's All, Folks Chuck Jones is dead. Remember before Bugs Bunny was given redeeming qualities? Remember when Daffy Duck was actually daffy? Remember when cartoon weren't just for children and weren't so PC? Remember when they were actually drawn? That was the work of Chuck Jones, the manic genius behind all the classic Warner Bros. cartoons of the '30s and '40s and '50s. By the '60s, it was all over. But that cartoon heyday was quite a ride. We missed you long before you left us, Chuck. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If You Ban Scientologoy, Then PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/23/2002 11:54:49 AM ----- BODY: If You Ban Scientologoy, Then Only Scientologists Will Have Bans. Is This Joke Old Yet? This one thanks to Drudge. A French prosecutor wants the courts to shut down the Paris-area "Church" of Scientology. Liberty, Equality, Fraternity? The French don't know the meaning of the first word in their own slogan. By trying to ban a church, you've admitted defeat -- but you cheese eating surrender monkies know all about that, don't you? Play from a position of strength, instead. Ridicule the silly bastards. UPDATE: VodkaPundit is no longer sure if he was referring to the French or Scientology when he wrote, "Ridicule the silly bastards." But does it have to be either/or? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Not Saying Much, But PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/23/2002 12:00:45 PM ----- BODY: It's Not Saying Much, But He Means Well Natalija Radic takes on Danial Pearl's killers a lot better than I did. Read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We're All the Same Height PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/23/2002 12:08:17 PM ----- BODY: We're All the Same Height Lying Down, and Other Bad Lines Megan "Makes Steve Wish He Were Taller" McArdle led the way to one of those silly and useless web personality tests. Except that this one seems neither silly nor useless. Fun, really -- and accurate. This one attempts to figure out which Great Philosopher you most adhere to. I scored 100% for Hobbes and 94% for Rand, so the test is pretty much dead-on. Take it. S'fun. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Damn, I Love the Blogosphere PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/23/2002 12:24:49 PM ----- BODY: Damn, I Love the Blogosphere Will Warren picked up my gauntlet and ran with it, to seriously mix up some metaphors. Go read his Daniel Pearl, R.I.P. Moving. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Really Don't Get It PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/23/2002 06:57:17 PM ----- BODY: They Really Don't Get It Department Thanks to InstaPundit for the link. Read this after breakfast Sunday. Read it twice. I'm going to go have a weekend now. Salud. UPDATE: The link went stale, but is somehow returned to piping hot fresh. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hungover and Without Coffee, He's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/24/2002 10:59:51 AM ----- BODY: Hungover and Without Coffee, He's Already Blogging George Will looked at Joe Lieberman's presidential prospects a couple weeks ago, and now turns his eye towards North Carolina Senator John Edwards. Worth your time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Return of the Son of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/24/2002 11:07:33 AM ----- BODY: Return of the Son of the Revenge of So What Do We Do with Them, Pt XVIII Excellent reporting -- not commentary -- from Tom Friedman at the NYT, ending his travels through Saudi Arabia. The upshot? Saudi is held hostage to its own tribalism. The odds of reform look scarce. Also, I think maybe Maureen Dowd wrote something, but I just wasn't up to clicking. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Balm for Itchy Trigger PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/24/2002 11:22:00 AM ----- BODY: A Balm for Itchy Trigger Fingers Disturbing report in the Washington Post on our lack of military readiness to tackle Saddam Hussein. We're looking at a minimum of six months, and more probably a year or longer before we'll have all the toys we need. (And before you skip this post, it is not yet another Look-What-Bill-Clinton-Did-to-Our-Armed-Forces lament.) The story did not indicate whether the 12-month timeframe included deployment -- which took six months to get everything in place for Desert Storm in '90-'91. However, reporters Walter Pincus and Karen DeYoung did say that basing in Saudi could be a problem. If we don't get permission from the Saudis, there simply is no other border nation that can duplicate their logistic support. From wide open spaces for maneuver, to all the diesel an army could ever desire, Saudi Arabia has it all. So things are going to get pretty exciting sometime next summer. If the Saudis don't cooperate on basing like they did n '90, then we're going to have to either topple that regime, or put a helluva lot of soldiers into the tiny territory of Kuwait. And bunching up armor like that -- we called it a "target-rich environment" when the Soviets did it -- is completely against US Army doctrine. I think Colin Powell is going to stack up some serious frequent flier miles between Washington and Riyadh before August. UPDATE: I agree with Pat -- see the "drink" below -- that we should take the Caesar Option with Iraq. You know, "All of Gaul is divided into three parts." Give oil-rich Mosul (with Kurdish autonomy) to the Turks, the Shi'ite south to a democratic Iran, and the Sunni center we'll turn over to the UN for a thorough Marshall Planning. Here's why. The Turks are going to take a swift kick to the economic groin helping us in this war. The '91 Gulf War set them back a decade, and we didn't do much to help. So, the oil fields of Mosul go to them. They can bootstrap themselves into the 21st Century in a way the Arab oil states either can't or won't. Of course, there must be firm protections for the Kurds, along with revenue sharing. Perhaps some sort of federal system. Assuming we follow my Iran First strategy, we'll have a friendly-or-at-least neutral Iran to work with. Their reward for democracy will be custody of their Shi'ite brethren in the south of Iraq, the so-called "marsh Arabs." The best part? Imagine a democratic Iran that also borders Saudi. Would the 7,000 princes shit themselves before or after booking one-way flights to Switzerland? The Sunni Arab middle of Iraq will start learning Canadian English and Walloon as UN peacekeepers move in, set up a constitution, hold elections, etc. We'll Marshall Plan them into 2003. Or at least into 1953, which is still a huge step up. At this point, the "government" of Syria will probably have collapsed. Perhaps we should fold that country into Baghdad rump of Iraq(it's been discussed before), creating a UN-administered Arab democracy from the Tigres to the Mediterranean. The Israelis can handle Beirut and Ramallah -- Egypt can wait for another campaign. Sadly, the Administration is not quite daring enough for this approach. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Another Hero Felled in the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:03:57 AM ----- BODY: Another Hero Felled in the War This one is just too sad to comment on. It seems there are fools and heroes in equal numbers. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Also Claimed There'd Be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:06:19 AM ----- BODY: He Also Claimed There'd Be Only One Tiny Post about CFR VodkaPundit is going to ignore, mostly, the whole Aaron Sorkin/NBC/White House/Stupid Remarks brouhaha. The VodkaFiancée got me to watch an episode of the dreadfully silly The West Wing a few months back, and once was enough. Here was a show, praised for its wit and supposed knowledge, getting a most basic fact wrong from Poli Sci 101. Some smart and pretty person was trying to get the President to back some bill that would give Congress power to regulate driver’s licenses or some such Leviathan silliness. Some other smart and pretty person retorted, “Giving Washington that power would be federalism run amok!” Need I say more about Mr. Sorkin's brains? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Ridge Is Still Useless PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:11:39 AM ----- BODY: Tom Ridge Is Still Useless Reuters (Motto: “One Man’s Wire Service is Another Man’s Unfunny Laughingstock”) reports a tunnel has been found under the US embassy in Rome. The tunnel is new, and officials believe it was dug in order to plant a bomb under the compound, in “days, or even hours.” Does this mean that Homeland Security has made the US such a tough nut to crack that the barbarians are now just going after our overseas offices? Or just that Italian is just a bit easier to break than ours? Or that they just had the opportunity? If you guessed a combo somewhere between the second and last guesses, then you win a dollar. Homeland Security is mostly a joke, and will remain so. I don’t mean that because of laziness or incompetence, but just that real security is incompatible with freedom – and we’ll keep out freedom. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And That Ululating Is Damn PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:14:43 AM ----- BODY: And That Ululating Is Damn Annoying, Too Head over to Opinion Journal and read Victor Davis Hanson’s contribution. Anything under the subhead “They hate us because their culture is backward and corrupt” is automatically good reading. Thanks to Mr. Hanson and a select few bloggers, I’m happy to report I’ll never corner the market on In Your Face punditry. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Paging Kolkata Has Suman Palit PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:17:21 AM ----- BODY: Paging Kolkata Has Suman Palit read this one yet? I’m curious to read what he has to say about the current influence of Hindu nationalism in India. It’s always messy trying to help politically even your friends in other countries. And when nationalism is the problem, the best thing outsiders can do is probably just butt the hell out. UPDATE: Suman has read this, and replied with a yet another incisive post at Kolkata Libertarian. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: In Other News, Arab Alchemists PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:25:30 AM ----- BODY: In Other News, Arab Alchemists Fail to Create Gold -- Again! Safire gets it right Monday, with the (not so shocking) revelation that, “The way to end the Palestinian guerrilla war against Israel is to demonstrate forcefully that such a war cannot be won.” Part of the reason Germany launched World War II was they never experienced firsthand the horrors of modern war, like, say Belgium and northern France did in WWI. After getting their entire nation leveled and then divided in '45, they’ve finally settled down to a posture not much more aggressive than Denmark. So, Safire nails it when he says the US should step back and let the warring parties, well, war it out a while. That’s one way to make sure the Palestinians get tired of hitting their collective head against the Wailing Wall. But. The masses of the Arab world still live in a pre-Renaissance mindset. Reason and logic are in a distant tie for third place behind mysticism and faith. How do you prove futility to a mind unwilling to accept any proof outside the Koran? How does one demonstrate resolve to a “street” unwilling to accept evidence they don’t like? Remember, these are the same people who claim to believe that Jews/the CIA/Bush/anyone-but-Arabs committed the 9/11 atrocities. Second, even Western Europe only begrudgingly accepts Israel’s existence, and would probably be happier if that “shitty little country” just went away. Not that they want another Holocaust or anything, but… let's be kind and just say that Israel gets in the way of France really kowtowing to Middle East oil sheiks. Pity. Anyway, the point is this: With global acceptance of Israel damn near zero outside the US, how far up can Israel crank the heat before the whole planet demands another halt to the "cycle" of violence? We don’t have to listen to the whining, but the US will pay an increasingly higher political price the closer Israel gets to forcing an equitable settlement. That’s right -- the better the chances for peace, the more support we’ll lose for our War on Terror. How’s that for a nice little mess? And why does it take a cranky insomniac blogger to see the stuff that Safire should have put in his column? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Jetlag, Hangover, It's All Good PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:30:28 AM ----- BODY: Jetlag, Hangover, It's All Good Andrew Sullivan is apparently fully recovered from his jetlag, and has some seriously good blogs this morning. While Krugmanwatch is up to two posts, neither one involves Enron -- breathe a heavy sigh of relief. Good reading. Get to it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Insomniacs Should Never Look at PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:35:30 AM ----- BODY: Insomniacs Should Never Look at the News After 4pm The Washington Times reports that two US senators beleive there may be 100 al Qaeda operating still in the US, and that another terrorist attack "is probable." And people wonder why I can never sleep. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Self-Infatuate When You Can PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:39:12 AM ----- BODY: Why Self-Infatuate When You Can Have an Intern Do it for You? A Tim Blair post I missed Sunday, but you should read it right the hell now. I won't say much, other than this: Clinton is apprently projecting the hate he knows he deserves onto our entire nation. His self-infatuation really knows no bounds. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Closing Unceremoniously VodkaPundit's final words PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 12:54:59 AM ----- BODY: Closing Unceremoniously VodkaPundit's final words on the 2002 Winter Games: I still love the Olympics, but they sure as hell don't make it easy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Drives You Over the Clift PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 10:16:31 AM ----- BODY: Drives You Over the Clift Eleanor Clift, last seen trying to proposition both the 42nd president and his wife, now asks if the War on Terror is just a re-election ploy for President Bush. When President Clinton lobbed a few missiles to retaliate against terrorist attacks on U.S. embassies, the punditocracy shouted “Wag the Dog!” President Bush is traveling the globe beating the war drums and there’s barely a scintilla of skepticism. Eleanor, do you see those smoking ruins in Manhattan? Yeah, there went my skepticism that this is a real war. “Bush says U.S. plans no attack on North Korea.” What kind of insanity would such an attack actually be? Does North Korea supply missiles to terrorist states like Iran? Yes. Does North Korea starve its own people by the millions? Yes. Is North Korea probably the most vile and oppressive regime on the planet? Yes. Is Eleanor Clift capable of non-carping, non-shrill, rational thought? No. Yet the pronouncement is treated with sober reflection, as if Bush had just made a major foreign-policy statement. When the commander-in-chief of the world's paramount military says in time of war that he has no plans to attack a nation, you better damn well believe it's a major foreign policy statement. Bush's numbers are so high he could probably announce he was sending the Marines in to Eleanor's Georgetown condo and get cheers. Hell, I'd cheer for that myself, but only if there was a lot of collateral damage. Most pundits and policymakers in Washington figure the Bush administration will take military action against Iraq within six months—just in time for the fall elections. That would smash Democratic hopes of turning the country’s attention to domestic issues where Bush might be vulnerable. There you have it -- Clift comes out full bore with the Wag the Dog scenario. Look, you Marxist Shrewpixie, W is not a man with a sex scandal brewing or some criminal revelation about to come to light. He is, whether you like him or not (and I have some big issues with the man) our wartime leader. Iraq is a nation that every decade or so invades its neighbors, gasses its own people, and is working on WMDs with which to kill our people. Furthermore, Iraq is not in compliance with the ceasefire they signed in 1991 -- reason alone to resume the war we won the first time. Bush is vulnerable on the environment and his handling of the economy, but the reputation he once had as a shallow party animal was left behind in the dust of the World Trade Center. Bush will continue to keep the war on terrorism front-and-center. He believes in it, and it works politically. Read that last part over again. Clift sublty makes the claim that there's no difference between the smoldering ruins in NYC (I think most all of us believe in that) and what "works politically." In other words, if Bush's numbers weren't so high, he'd be pulling back from the War. We need people like Clift to drag us back to "reality" so that we won't support the President's re-election effort, er, war. Eleanor Clift wants to convince you that stopping those who would kill you is less important than the Democrats re-taking Congress in November. Your life is less important that Eleanor Clift's political desires. We have not had a total war since World War II, and it could happen again if Bush continues on the path he has set toward reshaping the geopolitical world into an American global empire. Having out cities gutted and our civilians killed is preferable to total war? Look, babe, we didn't start this total war -- they did years ago; it just took us a while to notice. 9/11 woke us up. If we don't "reshape the geopolitical world," then it will continue to reshape our downtowns. With bombs or passenger jets or nukes. And isn't an American global empire (which the world can't become, for mostly domestic reasons) preferable to the murderous disorder we have now? The president who used to get that deer-in-the-headlights look is now so confident that he could be his own worst enemy. Afghanistan was easy. But war without end is not a policy; it’s asking for trouble. Once again, we didn't ask for this trouble -- it crashed into our skyscrapers and our military HQ. And this is not a war without end -- it ends when the other side either cries uncle or draws its last breath. UPDATE: A quick reply to Bill's post in the "drink" just below. Now wait, Bill -- Eleanor didn't make a single quagmire reference, so we have to give her 18 Brownie Points. Add those 18 into her current total, and she stands at -1,000,006. So she's not quite out of the hole yet. On the other hand, I think we might have to take back those points if we work from the assumption that she didn't mention quagmire because she's afraid we'll win. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Is it 2004 Already? Longer PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 10:32:04 AM ----- BODY: Is it 2004 Already? Longer than your usual web offering, but Howard Fineman does some excellent Internet-only reporting on the 2004 presidential race. Hop to it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No, He Made Up "Shrewpixie" PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 10:41:39 AM ----- BODY: No, He Made Up "Shrewpixie" Himself Found this site through Sekimori, my dedicated web designer and all-'round great gal. The Creative Vulgarian's Lexicom. Read this one at work, but keep the text small and be careful of coffee nose shots. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Technical Difficulties. Please Stand By PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 10:46:23 AM ----- BODY: Technical Difficulties. Please Stand By Blogspot is having one of those days again. I can -- and will -- keep posting, but your load times might be a bit longer than you like. But stick around. There will be a quiz later. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Was it for Calling Eleanor PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 10:48:55 AM ----- BODY: Was it for Calling Eleanor Clift a "Marxist Shrewpixie?" Wow! I just made Sgt. Stryker's Red Dye #5. That's his blog of the day or week -- can't remember which. Sarge, I'm very, very flattered. Also, I'm thankful for the temporary promotion from "luscious caramel." That one made me feel kinda dirty. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Raised Glass Salute Back PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 10:57:42 AM ----- BODY: A Raised Glass Salute Back at Ya The world wide blog has probably all linked to Andrew Sullivan's "A Blogger Manifesto" already, but I see no reason not to join in the pile-on. Andrew writes: It was, I realized two years ago, the nascent Napster of the journalism industry. Just as Napster by-passed the record companies and brought music to people with barely any mediation, so Blogger by-passed established magazines, newspapers, editors and proprietors, and allowed direct peer-to-peer journalism to flourish. He's half right. Most of us don't have the resources to do our own reporting. But we can do the cheap version -- punditry -- every bit as well as the pros. Those who actually make a living at it, like Sullivan, provide the red meat the rest of us feed on, then pre-digest for the general public in short, witty snippets which sometimes include the word "shewpixie." Seriously, the entire article is -- unlike other recent pieces -- true to the spirit of blogging. It's also a joy to read and a great reminder why so many of us have taken this little hobby far too far. Sullivan is one of the guys who got this whole thing going -- you owe to him to read his manifesto. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Much Scarier than al Qaeda PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 11:45:57 AM ----- BODY: Much Scarier than al Qaeda -- Pakistan Already Has Nukes Go read this post of Little Green Footballs. Self-abnegation and national failure as excuses for nuclear holocaust. Frightening, and all too plausible. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VP Promises to Lay Off PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 01:44:24 PM ----- BODY: VP Promises to Lay Off Jonah for Maybe 12 Hours Good words from Jonah Goldberg to Pat Buchanan: "Race isn't the point, so drop it. Now." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That Is a Telescope and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 02:49:24 PM ----- BODY: That Is a Telescope and I'm Happy to See You One of the most popular websites pays good money to pollute the web with Eleanor Clift -- while we have to visit labor-of-love amateurs like Steven Den Beste for the real news. If you've ever looked up at a summer sky on a moonless night and thought, "Oh, pretty," then you need to read what the crew of Space Shuttle Columbia is doing to Hubble. We ain't seen nothin' yet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Pro at Work Today's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 03:30:31 PM ----- BODY: A Pro at Work Today's G-File offers a takedown of Pat Buchanan so large as to be matched in scope only by Pat's mouth. Read: "To be able to say something that wins applause from racists and bigots without technically saying anything racist or bigoted is a great gift, for want of a better word." Jonah Goldberg usually frustrates even us small-l libertarians because of his willful misunderstanding of our beliefs. But when he's willing to take down a fellow right-winger -- and does it so masterfully -- you'll understand why we keep reading his stuff. Keep it up, Jonah. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Third World Nations Need PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 03:55:35 PM ----- BODY: Why Third World Nations Need First World Standardized Testing From Reuters (motto: "One Man's Trusted News Source Is Another Man's Bladder Control Problem") comes this story: "Chinese police have detained a student who poured sulphuric acid on five bears in Beijing Zoo as part of an experiment to test their intelligence, state media said on Monday." First off, you do not taunt bears, poke at bears with sticks, or pour burning things on bears. They are bigger than you and have sharp claws. There is the possible exception of panda bears, which are cute and cuddly and would probably rather gnaw your skull than breed. Second, are we sure the test wasn't designed to determine the lack of intelligence of certain undergrads? Third. "Liu was a student at Beijing's prestigious Tsinghua University, often called China's equivalent of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology in the United States." I've never been a student at MIT or any Ivy League school, but after a brief tour of their campus 20 years ago, I will make the bold prediction that the students there do not pour acid on bears, throw rocks at bee hives, or charge at lions. Fourth. Not even students at our goddamn community colleges meddle with dangerous wildlife. Much. Fifth. "Causing injury to rare animals in China is punishable by a fine and jail terms of up to or exceeding 10 years, Xinhua said." Assuming, of course, they can identify the remains out of the tiger droppings. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why We Love Our Readers, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 04:37:46 PM ----- BODY: Why We Love Our Readers, Reason #1,000,006 Extremely Smart Reader John Yundt-Pacheco has been doing extra credit homework and comes up with couple of links that become juicy when mixed. Try this starter from today's Jerusalem Post: "Sounding more like an Israeli than an American politician, New York Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton last night lambasted Palestinian Authority Chairman Yasser Arafat and said he has failed as a leader." Wow. Clinton hit that one out of the Yankee Stadium she's visited maybe twice. It's not exactly a eureka! moment, but for the woman who (as John reminded me) once publicly kissed Suha Arafat, it's a nice little bout of honesty. Now, let's set the wayback machine for 1999 and FrontPage Magazine. Here are a couple snippets from a Lowell Ponte column: Jewish-born former Clinton consultant Dick Morris and Arkansas Clinton guard Larry Patterson have told of Hillary saying things that sound shockingly anti-Jewish. While Hillary chaired the New World Foundation from 1982 until 1988, it gave a $15,000 grant to Grassroots International, which, according to Olson, "had direct ties to the PLO." On December 6 [1999], Hillary plans to host a $500-per-person gala fundraiser in Manhattan for Americans for Peace Now. This group, writes Gregg Birnbaum in the New York Post, not only works to create a Palestinian state but also one with part of Jerusalem as its capital. I usually don't jump on the Hillary- or Bill-bashing bandwagon very often. Others do it better -- and it's been done to death. But the contrast -- not to mention hypocrisy -- was brought into such sharp relief by those two stories that I couldn't resist. Speaking out of both sides of the mouth is a common affliction among the jabbering class, but when it concerns a vital ally in a time of war, it can't be ignored. SPECIAL: Bonus extra credit points to anyone who remembers the "million and six" reference in the headline. Here's a hint -- it's from the late '70s and I was way too young to be listening to that guy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Our Long National Nightmare is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 04:47:40 PM ----- BODY: Our Long National Nightmare is Over It's official -- Sarge Stryker is back in business and back with a vengeance. Check out the Universal Translator and his live dissection of Nicolas Kristof. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Yet Another Bit of Shameless PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/25/2002 06:42:15 PM ----- BODY: Yet Another Bit of Shameless Self-Promotion Jackson Murphy takes the news networks to task: CNN, MSNBC, FOX hello are you listening? Please for the love of god, take stupid shows like “Talkback Live” off the air and give us our own show. (Just a thought) Want me to run the numbers on this? Take Bloggers and other newsies in North America and you could bury the other shows with ratings. Might I add to Jackson's rant that I'm quite telegenic and have broadcast experience? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Was So Close to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:00:40 AM ----- BODY: He Was So Close to Being Right The NYT’s Nicolas Kristof is quickly becoming their Bizarro Friedman. Friedman is the guy who is so dead on 90% of the time, that the 10% he gets totally backwards is completely frustrating. Now here comes Junior P-Man Kristof, who has the formula backwards. As readers of Sgt. Stryker know, Kristof can’t get much right. Let’s say 90%. And today demonstrates that the 10% he gets right, he gets so amazingly right that your head spins. Today Kristof tackles North Korea, where the US really hasn’t had a policy since Eisenhower, Nicolas is correct to point out. Well, no policy much other than to stick an infantry division on the DMZ between the two Koreas and hope like hell the North Koreans never march south again. It’s not that they’d win, but they’d set South Korea back economically a double decade and politically even further. What it comes down to is that Clinton’s ill-advised 1994 light-water reactor deal isn’t going to, well, hold water. Basically, Clinton offered to feed the Democratic People’s Republic and provide two light-water plants in exchange for unverifiable promises not to build a weapons production-capable nuclear plant. That deal is not going to stick. Unsurprisingly, the Dear Leader doesn’t trust W and President Bush (surprise!) doesn’t much trust East Asia’s last hard-line Stalinist dictator. Writes Kristof: "The moment that North Korea is convinced that the light-water reactors are not going to be delivered, they will explore alternative avenues" — meaning reviving the nuclear program, said Han S. Park, a political scientist at the University of Georgia who is a regular visitor to North Korea. So far, so good. Could we put something on the table to get the North to play nice? Sure – if we’re willing to give them everything they want. Bad idea. One, it would show we’ll cave to dictators in search of nuclear weapons. Two, we’d be propping up a regime that has so many of its 22 million subjects go hungry that the capital city is bare of vegetation, including grass. Three, there’s no way to verify any deal with a nation as hermetically sealed as the DPRK. But then Kristof goes back to being himself: The only practical measure I can see is to press ahead on engagement with North Korea. That helped tame another Asian Communist regime, beginning in 1972 when an earlier Republican president showed the courage to initiate a real, high-level dialogue with China. China, already armed with nukes, was needed as a counterbalance to the Soviet Union at a time when the US was brought low politically, morally, and militarily by the pullout from South Vietnam. North Korea is a tin pot country trying to get nukes. The trick is to keep them from doing so without doing much to keep that rotten dictatorship functioning. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If They Don't Have to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:09:47 AM ----- BODY: If They Don't Have to Join, Why Do We? Wish them luck, but don't count on them winning. From Drudge, this Times (UK) story of a small group of brave Swiss, determined to keep their country free and neutral -- by keeping Switzerland out of the UN. Cute. I hope they get their wish. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Following Is Fiction, But PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:14:35 AM ----- BODY: The Following Is Fiction, But That Doesn't Make It Any Less True SorkinWatch Update: It's just after 11pm Pacific Time. No bouts of verbal diarrhea or political Tourette's Syndrome this evening, but he's only on his first bowl and Leno isn't on yet. The baggie of shrooms lies untouched next to the Cheetohs on his nightstand, so visual acuity is still sharp and grounded in reality. We'll try to provide more details if he lights up again during the Gilligan Marathon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Following Is Fiction, But PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:14:35 AM ----- BODY: The Following Is Fiction, But That Doesn't Make It Any Less True SorkinWatch Update: It's just after 11pm Pacific Time. No bouts of verbal diarrhea or political Tourette's Syndrome this evening, but he's only on his first bowl and Leno isn't on yet. The baggie of shrooms lies untouched next to the Cheetohs on his nightstand, so visual acuity is still sharp and grounded in reality. We'll try to provide more details if he lights up again during the Gilligan Marathon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Raised Glass Salute to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:21:11 AM ----- BODY: A Raised Glass Salute to Blorg(?) I don't know who Dan Rector is. I'd never heard of his Blorg blog before just now. But Dan has a wonderful take on Olympic hockey, funny names, and what it means (or doesn't) to be an American. Check him out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: How Many Toasts Is That? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:27:33 AM ----- BODY: How Many Toasts Is That? Just found another blog that hasn't been around very long, but is surely worth a read or three. Check out Sine Qua Non Pundit by Charles Austin. If I keep this up the Raised Glass Salutes, things are going to get very wobbly here soon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If You Outlaw Arms Merchants, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:38:53 AM ----- BODY: If You Outlaw Arms Merchants, Then Only Laws Will Mechants Out-Arm. Or Something An ex-Soviet Army officer may be the merchant behind the madness. The Washington Post reports that Victor Bout runs an arms empire out of United Arab Emirates, and US and European intelligence agencies say they're thwarting his operations. This is part of the story I thought of briefly, ages ago, then promptly forgot about entirely. Click for details. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Caution: The Following Post Is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:55:09 AM ----- BODY: Caution: The Following Post Is Designed to Annoy Republicans. And Democrats Another story we should see on our front pages every day but don't, is Colombia's new offensive against FARC guerillas. In case you haven't been following, FARC is an old Latin-style Marxist group, so flush with drug money that they carved out their own mini-country the size of Switzerland inside of Colombia. Three years ago, Colombia was so desperate and broke they negotiated a so-called "peace zone" which FARC could "govern" unmolested by the Colombian army, courts, police, you-name-it. Imagine if Taiwain were in the middle of China, instead of an island. Better yet, make it the other way around. While Bill Clinton was busy getting his knob polished, Colombia was fighting for its very existence -- and losing. So, forgetting for a moment the delicious irony of a rich Marxist group buying their own jungle dictatorship, let's look at what's going on now. A few days ago, Colombia President Andres Pastrana ordered the army back into FARC's territory. You can read my earlier comments here, complete with an obscure Steely Dan reference. The reason I say we need to pay more attention to this mess is shown in today's LA Times. Reporter T. Christian Miller writes that Colombia discovered terrorist training camps, a maintenance yard, and pretty much everything else your modern rogue state needs to dysfunction. We know IRA barbarians trained there -- who else might have? While I doubt Colombia has much future as a genuine nation-state, in this fight they deserve our help and our attention. NOTE: Oh, and if you want to take FARC's drug money away, don't count on reforming junkies, Aaron Sorkin, or half my old college buddies. Just legalize the crap and watch those ridiculous profit margins wither away like the Marxist state. SECOND NOTE: Hah! The Marxists states have mostly withered away -- it's the capitalist states that are thriving. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Please Note I Did Not PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 01:02:41 AM ----- BODY: Please Note I Did Not Use the Word "Cakewalk" Jim Dunnigan -- one of the guys who invented modern war-gaming -- has a good look at the Iraqi military we face today. And how, exactly, we might face it. Finally, something cheerful. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: SorkinWatch Update -- Midnight Edition PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 01:23:55 AM ----- BODY: SorkinWatch Update -- Midnight Edition Sorkin has passed out upright on the sofa with a tumbler of Jack on his belly and a Camel Light filter burnt out between his fingers. The television is still on and showing bits of Leno. Sorkin let out one brief screed using the mysterious phrase, "touch me, Rummy," but it is believed that was a dream and not a conscious outburst. The shrooms remain untouched, but the last of the Cheetohs are gone. Our spies have yet to uncover any further details. Stay tuned for further reports just as soon as Aaron has slept it off. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Steal This Column Link courtesy PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 11:06:30 AM ----- BODY: Steal This Column Link courtesy Andrew Sullivan. Exposed by Michael Lewis, the greed of Enron employees. No, not the bosses, the employees. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Maybe Not That Soon Yes, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 11:35:40 AM ----- BODY: Maybe Not That Soon Yes, kids -- Blogger is cranky again today. I offered it some of my coffee, but to no avail. Hang in there -- I'm sure Ev will have the problem fixed before there's a new Pope. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Caution: Many Bad Puns Ahead PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 11:46:40 AM ----- BODY: Caution: Many Bad Puns Ahead From Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Rectal Exam") we learn that Ohio's Renegade cow has, after 11 days on the run, been captured. In case you hadn't, um, heard, the cow escaped from a slaughterhouse before it could, uh, meet its maker. Kowtowing to its new celebrity status, a Ken Meyer Meats representitive said they have decided to let bessie live. Then this, "Marge Schott, the former owner of the Cincinnati Reds' baseball team, has said the cow can have a new home on her farm. " Asked for comment, the cow simply walked back into the slaughterhouse. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: SorkinWatch -- Midday Edition Our PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 11:52:27 AM ----- BODY: SorkinWatch -- Midday Edition Our Los Angeles Celebrity Spy Network has the following notebook entries on "The West Wing" producer Aaron Sorkin's latest activities. 9:00am No political talk, still asleep upright on sofa. "Today Show" blaring on TV. Jack D spilled 9:37am Shuffles off sofa. Searches bedroom for bong, finds it on sofa in living room. Quick morning pick-me-up. 10:17am No shower, yesterday's clothes, puts on baseball cap and heads to Starbucks. Impossible to determine if that was a lowfat halfcaff latte or a regular latte. Will be sending intern in to dig through trash for reciept. More exciting details on the life and times of this political dynamo/TV genius coming soon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Juan's Bucket O' Really Fine PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:01:13 PM ----- BODY: Juan's Bucket O' Really Fine Rants I just didn't have the emotional energy to deal with Pual Krugman's latest Brush with Idiocy today -- so I'm extra-glad Juan Gato did such a smash-up job of it. A takedown of Krugman better than even Sullivan has done in weeks. Worth your time. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Right About NOW I'm probably PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:20:32 PM ----- BODY: Right About NOW I'm probably the last blogger to link to the latest Wendy McElroy on Fox, but I needed an excuse to use that semi-witty headline. If I'm late with the links, it's because like Ken Layne, I don't believe that getting to work early -- or even waking up before brunch -- is a virtue. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: So What Are You Still PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:25:21 PM ----- BODY: So What Are You Still Doing Here? Hypertext novelty songs! Yes, the latest from Will Warren serves not just as great entertainment, but further proof that he is a genius. On the other hand, I'm a semi-philistine, so take my opinions cultural with a grain of salt. Or perhaps an entire salt lick. But whatever you do, read Will's Such A Disagreeable Man. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: SorkinWatch -- Special Edition 11:40am PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:40:20 PM ----- BODY: SorkinWatch -- Special Edition 11:40am Conspiracy theorists, take note. Starbucks employee Condoleeza (not her real name) claims to have no recollection of Sorkin saying anything treasonous while giving his order or while standing in line. She also claims not to remember whether he asked for a "little" cinnamon, or "a dusting" of cinnamon. Certainly sounds like a cover-up. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "The Amazing Kristof" Early this PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 12:51:58 PM ----- BODY: "The Amazing Kristof" Early this morning I took issue (surprise!) with Nicolas Kristof's Tuesday NYT column. For an even smarter (although less smart-ass) appraisal, get your self over to Smarter Times. Thanks to Sarge for that headline -- but I'm gonna figure out a Kreskin joke one of these days. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And That Includes the Ones PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 01:00:47 PM ----- BODY: And That Includes the Ones Aaron Sorkin Doesn't Know Headline from Drudge (although the link wasn't working last time I checked): Teens Drink Quarter of All Alcohol Consumed in U.S. So explain to me then why I still found it damn near impossible to get laid in high school. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool-Fest Alert Now PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 01:16:33 PM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool-Fest Alert Now this is just cool. Steven J. Cole writes in Strategy Page: The US Navy has now decided to convert four (instead of just two) Trident missile submarines to carry conventional cruise missiles. Moreover, it is studying new kinds of warheads and payloads for the missiles, as well as new missiles. Some possibilities include a supersonic missile to hit targets that are likely to move, an unmanned recon drone that could be lofted over the target by a cruise missile and then extend wings and cruise like an aircraft, and various kinds of bomblets, penetrating warheads, or fuel-air explosives. Boomers are big (the size of a WWII aircraft carrier), they're slow, and they steer like an Ohio cow. But there's not a nation on earth that can find ours. Hell, we usually can't even find ours. A guy I knew briefly back in my Arcata days used to work sonor for an advanced Los Angeles-class attack sub in Squadron 22 out of Groton, I think. He had a great little sea story... The were on mock patrol, hunting for an Ohio-class missile boat that was doing the world's best impression of falling into a hole and dragging the hole away. The sonor guy thought he maybe heard something that might have possibly somehow been the boomer, then it was gone. The Captain logged it -- and later they both got very nice marks in their dossiers. You see, when the two sub skippers had their notes compared after the exercise, it turns out they had heard the boomer -- they just didn't know it at the time. So our very best hunter-killers can maybe sometimes find one of our SSBNs under ideal circumstances, but surely no Axis of Evil country can. And when coverted for "conventional" attack work, there's not a nation on earth they won't be able to sneak up on, hurt badly, and then slink away. Cool. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Just that Kind of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 04:39:08 PM ----- BODY: It's Just that Kind of Day The new issue of Time just arrived in my mailbox. The cover asks, "Can Bono save the world?" Punchline A: I dunno. Can smoking cure cancer? Punchline B: I thought he died skiing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: SorkinWatch: The Banality of... Um... PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 04:48:27 PM ----- BODY: SorkinWatch: The Banality of... Um... Banality Spy notebooks list the following 12:01pm Aaron returns home from Starbucks. Drops empty latte cup on sidewalk 12:10pm Two hits off bong. Sitting in front of typewriter and small mirror with razor blade. 1:15pm Two "West Wing" scripts and "A Return to Sports Night" pilot script complete 1:20pm Phone call from agent. Unintelligible, other than repeated use of phrase "you can't make me." 1:30pm-2:48pm Watching TVLand. Once shouted an obscentiy at Wilbur, but still nothing even remotely seditious. 2:48pm-3:48pm Watching TVLand with a fresh bottle of Jack and a crumpled softpack of Camel Lights. We're all up to date now. More exciting details as our spies report in! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This One Will Generate Some PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 07:19:15 PM ----- BODY: This One Will Generate Some Googles Mandatory reading from Dick Morris (no, really) in today's New York Post. I would have found this hours ago, were I not wasting time with the silly SorkinWatch and Drunken Teen Sex Debate. Where has the day gone? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: So Do Recycled Newspapers Go PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 07:23:31 PM ----- BODY: So Do Recycled Newspapers Go In the Debit or Credit Column? We've read that some environmental groups use junk science -- but junk bonds? William Quick points the way to this unusual story that's not getting a lot of play. That's right, Ken Lay thought he could use the Kyoto Treaty to slam you into paying Enron more money while crippling the rest of the economy. Still mad that Enron Tanked? Seems more like sweet justice to me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Those Feisty Brunettes Do It PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 08:02:42 PM ----- BODY: Those Feisty Brunettes Do It to Me Every Time Maybe I just like watching Julia Louis-Dreyfus run around in a hot little red dress. Maybe I just like watching something new and fresh. Whatever, I just like Watching Ellie. Julia is gorgeous and funny as always, and -- I never knew! -- has a lovely voice for jazz standards. I hope every show features a song. Even her band was tight. The Daily Show's Steve Carrell was perfectly annoying as the ex-boyfriend, and Darren Boyd as the current boyfriend looks and sounds like a young, blonde John Cleese. I watch maybe four TV shows a week. Now it's five. Good stuff. Set your VCR. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: SorkinWatch Evening Edition Our spy's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 10:04:48 PM ----- BODY: SorkinWatch Evening Edition Our spy's notebook contains the following entries: 5:15pm Munchies strike. Early dinner of Stouffer's Five-Cheese Lasagna, eaten with spoon. 5:31pm Turns on CBS News on kitchen TV. (We figured he'd watch Rather) 5:33pm Talking at TV, calls Bush an "asshole." Still, no traitorous reamarks. 6:00pm Turns off TV, plots overthrow of all existing order. (Sorry, we made up that last one just to spike things up a bit) 6:14pm Tells telemarketer to screw off. 6:48pm Finished doing dishes, takes a hit and then takes nap 8:25pm Hits snooze alarm and misses premiere of Watching Ellie Once again, readers, we'll keep you informed of all the amazing activites in the average day of a high-powered TV executive! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Drunken Teenage Sluts Part II PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 10:10:45 PM ----- BODY: Drunken Teenage Sluts Part II DailyPundit brought to my attention that the study I quoted earlier claiming that 25% of all booze in this country is consumed by teenagers, is woefully incorrect. The actual figure, according to the New York Times, is under 12%. Three things: 1) The initial figure was probably accurate from 1982-1989. VodkaPundit was born in 1969 -- you do the math. 2) The initial figure will probably be correct again within a few months of the onset my midlife crisis. 3) Even if neither of the above two items come true, a man can still dream, can't he? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Don't Drop the Soap PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 10:16:51 PM ----- BODY: Just Don't Drop the Soap Once again, Dan's super-fine ass shines through at Happy Fun Pundit. Just click and you'll understand. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Czech Judge Didn't Approve PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 11:21:42 PM ----- BODY: The Czech Judge Didn't Approve of Our Uniforms SatireWire out-onions The Onion. The story kicks off with, "Despite making what most observers agreed were "obvious technical errors," such as surrendering, the Taliban were awarded victory in the Afghanistan war last night after the French judge said they won on presentation." It gets funnier. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Roll Out the Blogger, We'll PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/26/2002 11:26:22 PM ----- BODY: Roll Out the Blogger, We'll Have a Blogger of Fun For his unusually well-reasoned posts, for his love of a good single malt (I'm an Oban guy myself), but mostly for his ability to work multiple Steely Dan song titles into a single sentence, Charles Austin's Sine Qua Non Pundit is officially blogrolled. Since I prefer my heavy news early, you'll find Charles under Hair o' the Dog. NOTE: I know I promised no more singing headlines, but what the hell -- it's late. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Long Post, But Size PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:03:59 AM ----- BODY: A Long Post, But Size Does Count. So Read It Already If it’s Wednesday, it must be Tom Friedman. An acquaintance here in Saudi Arabia told me this story: He was touring the countryside by car and got slightly lost. He saw a car down the road and approached it to ask directions, but each time he drew near, the car sped away. Eventually he caught up to it, the car pulled over, and a terrified driver jumped out to flee: it was a Saudi woman dressed like a man. In a country where it is illegal for women to drive, that's the only way for a lady to get behind the wheel. Great narrative lead, but you used it the other night on NewsHour. This story is a good reminder that not everything here operates in real life as it appears on paper — which is what makes predicting Saudi Arabia's future a very inexact science. As such, I've concluded that there are two possible models for Saudi Arabia's future. I call them the "Soviet school" and the "China school." Now we’re getting somewhere. Interesting theory. Can you back it up? The Soviet school argues that Saudi Arabia is an Islamic version of the Soviet Union: an absolute monarchy that is, like the Soviet Union, ultimately unreformable. The core of this regime is an alliance between a modernizing, but corrupt, theocracy led by the al-Saud family, and the ultraconservative Wahhabi religious establishment, which provides the al-Sauds with legitimacy, and the minute you try to reform it, the whole system will come unglued. The problem with this part of the theory is that unlike Communism, people actually believe in Islam. And the heart and soul of Arabia, the Bedouin tribesmen, seem to believe in the worst form of it, very, very fervently. This is how the Soviet school sees it: The ruling al-Saud brothers are like the old Soviet Politburo; the 50,000 al-Saud princes and relatives are the equivalent of the Communist Party. Wahhabism, the puritanical Saudi Arabian brand of Islam, is used by the al-Sauds to unite the 40 fractious tribes of the Arabian Peninsula, just as Communism was used by Lenin to unite the 100 fractious nationalities of Russia and its neighboring republics. Osama bin Laden is just the evil version of Andrei Sakharov — the insider who steps outside the system to declare that the king has no clothes. Sakharov was exiled to Gorky for that and bin Laden to Kabul. And ultimately, both systems went into decline after unhappy encounters where? In Afghanistan. Here’s why I like reading Friedman. How many other writers on international affairs would be ballsy enough to call bin Laden an evil Sakharov? But again, the theory doesn’t hold sand. In the early, Lenin days of the Soviet Union (it wasn’t even called that yet), people believed in Communism. Or at the very least, they welcomed it as a change from the Czar, hunger, and endless losses to the Germans. By the time of Brezhnev, no one believed anymore. By the time of Gorbachev, they no longer even feared. The intense Saudi competition with Iran for dominance over the Muslim world — which involves financing competing conservative Moslem schools and mosques from Pakistan to Indonesia — is identical to the Soviet competition with China for influence over the Communist world. This part I buy, but it isn’t germane to the argument. It just adds some nice color. The Soviet school concludes that Saudi Arabia has about five more years before its population boom, declining per capita income, need for education reform to create skilled workers and attract foreign investors, excessive defense spending and influx of satellite TV and the Internet combine to explode the Saudi system, just as they did the Soviet one. Huh? By all accounts, I thought the USSR was at best holding steady in population by the late ‘80s, thanks to ecological disaster, alcoholism, fear of the future, etc. And so far as I know, there was no Internet revolution in 1991. Boris Yeltsin’s people were sending out faxes while he stood on the tank. Furthermore, Russia did and does have first-rate universities, especially in engineering and the physical sciences – areas Communist ideology couldn’t really mess with. Today still, Russia is probably the best-educated third world nation ever. The China school, by contrast, begins with the assumption that Saudi Arabia is a country that makes no sense on paper but in real life has a lot more cushions and ballast, which enable it, like China, to pursue two seemingly contradictory policies at once. In China it's Communism and capitalism, and in Saudi Arabia it's Wahhabism and rapid modernization. Oil is to Saudi Arabia what huge direct foreign investment is to China — a natural resource that allows the system to buy off a lot of discontent and enables people to cheat on the system, and thereby let off steam, behind closed doors. Ahh. Now maybe we’re getting somewhere. Let’s keep reading. In the China school, Saudi Arabia's Crown Prince Abdullah is the equivalent of China's reformist Prime Minister Zhu Rongji. In particular, like Zhu, Abdullah is trying to push Saudi Arabia into the World Trade Organization to create external pressure for more rule of law and transparency — but this move is resisted by more corrupt elements of the elite who benefit from the status quo. I can’t argue with that, so I won’t. Finally, like China's rulers, the Saudi ruling elite knows how to stay in power and will do whatever it takes to do so. In China's case that meant bringing capitalists into the Communist Party and crushing students at Tiananmen, and in Saudi Arabia's case it will mean confronting the radical Islamists — just as the al-Sauds did before when they wanted to introduce radio, television and women's education. Like China's leaders, the Saudi monarchy can garner support from the middle class — not only by buying them off, but also by arguing that the alternative to their rule would be chaos or extremists. I need to quibble here. The House of Saud stays in power by supporting Radical Islam both at home and abroad. That’s why 15 of the 9/11 barbarian killers were Saudis. If Friedman means they’ll reverse course to keep the United States happy, I think he’s living in a dream world. Caught between a domestic threat and a foreign one, Saudi will choose to risk the wrath of the foreigners. The China school dismisses the idea that Saudi Arabia will collapse in five years. It notes, instead, that for 50 years, someone has come out with a study every five years that says Saudi Arabia has only five more years. Which school would I bet on? Ask me in five years. I can answer that one after this next sip of Scotch. (Slight pause) Saudi is a modified China. But Friedman left out the third school – the one run by the United States Marine Corps. One off-loaded division on Saudi’s Persian Gulf coast, and they’ll get quite an education. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: To Whom It May Concern PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:21:09 AM ----- BODY: To Whom It May Concern Someone is becoming a very frequent reader from the Popsite domain. I know this, because you're Googiling me every time you visit. I appreciate the engine hits, I really do. But do yourself a favor and bookmark VodkaPundit. You'll find it much easier to find it that way. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It Only Sounds Harsh Because PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:37:00 AM ----- BODY: It Only Sounds Harsh Because He Means It That Way Thanks to cloning techniques and embryonic research, and otherwise against the odds, a baby was born without the Alzeimer's gene. The 30-year-old mother, who is not named, carries a form of Alzeimer's that will surely strip her of her mind sometime in the next 10 years. This dominant version was certain to be passed on to any child she might bear -- without the help of medical science, that is. So will you anti-science weasels please now shut up? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Would You Like Curry With PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:43:42 AM ----- BODY: Would You Like Curry With That? More good news from the biggest potential member of the Anglosphere, courtesy of Fred Pruitt. According to this Times of India story, President Bush seeks to "intensify economic and defence collaboration with India." You can find my original hope for a very close and friendly relationship with India by clicking here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Does Frank Have Any PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:51:42 AM ----- BODY: But Does Frank Have Any Short Jokes About Robert Reich? Just when I thought I was El Supremo of the celebrity one-line put-down, here comes Dr. Frank. In this fun post, he calls Noam Chomsky a "senile academic demagogue gnome." And that's one of the nicer things the Good Doctor says. Read the whole thing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: For MY 16th Birthday, I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 01:25:55 AM ----- BODY: For MY 16th Birthday, I Wanted A Nice Bottle of Red, Not Too Tannic For those who missed last night's post: Yes, I was made aware that the drunken teens statistic was a damn lie. You can read my apology here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Such a Nice Little Neighborhood, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 11:03:13 AM ----- BODY: Such a Nice Little Neighborhood, Too Moving a little slowly right now. Woke up to the sound of the car alarm. Yep, a break-in. No damage, no one hurt -- but I still need some coffee and to settle down a bit. Twenty minutes VodkaPundit will back back to normal business. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Happy Happy, Joy Joy Alex PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 11:27:19 AM ----- BODY: Happy Happy, Joy Joy Alex Del Costillo alerts us to "How China Might Invade Taiwan" from the latest Naval War College Review. After reading this, I hope Taiwan is on the short list to buy F-35s. And lots of them. For the US not to recognize a legitimate democracy while continuing to lend legitimacy to the butchers of Beijing is beyond me. Listen closely: You do not get to kill your students with impunity. And we need to remember that American consumers hold more power over China than the PLA. And back to the NWCR for a second. Military publications have some of the best, most far-ranging, forward-looking articles you'll find on world events. Also check out the Army War College quarterly, Parameters. The Spring issue should be available soon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Will Be Missed Spike PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 11:32:58 AM ----- BODY: He Will Be Missed Spike Milligan is dead. From him we got Peter Sellers, Peter Cooke & Dudley Moore, and Monty Python. And from Python we got the equally irreplaceable Kids In The Hall. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's a Little Early for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 11:40:57 AM ----- BODY: It's a Little Early for a Drink, But What the Hell Richard Bennet is paying more attention to VodkaPundit than I am. Apparently, I outposted the Überblogger yesterday. Thank you, sir! A Raised Glass Salute to Omphalos. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And You Belgian Gits Better PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 11:50:42 AM ----- BODY: And You Belgian Gits Better Watch Yourselves, Too From Matt Welch. The URL says it all. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Back to the News, Right PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:17:16 PM ----- BODY: Back to the News, Right After This If reminiscing is the first sign of senility, then I probably don't have much longer before I'm drooling on myself and wearing Depends. In any case, some morbid curiosity got me to collect some celebrity one-line takedowns from the past few weeks on VodkaPundit. Jimmy Carter: “Incompetence is just a lamer form of evil.” Bono: “I thought he died skiing.” Paul Krugman: “He used to be a fair-minded an interesting economist. Now he just works for the New York Times.” Eleanor Clift: “Is Eleanor Clift capable of non-carping, non-shrill, rational thought?” Anne Rice: “Poor woman started taking herself seriously and her readers for granted.” Tom Ridge: “Tom Ridge is still useless.” On Michael Moore: “There is no cutting Moore down to size. Not without a total federal ban on Cheetohs.” Helen Thomas: “The world’s oldest living fossil.” Cal Thomas: “You are officially encouraged to ignore the hell out of Cal Thomas.” Rosie O’Donnell: “The only gay or bi woman with a thing for Tom Cruise” Howard Fineman: “Howard Fineman does everything but break out Monica Lewinski's Presidential Kneepads in this Newsweek write-up of W.” Brian Boitano: "The Mike Tyson of the Skating World." Robert Altman: "If Robert Altman stays in this country, then the terrorists will have won." Alec Baldwin: "And that goes double for Alec Baldwin." Al Gore: "Former Vice President and Presidential "candidate" Al Gore emerged from his hole yesterday, didn't see his shadow, and started making foreign policy noises." Bob Costas: "Costas is the smartest man on television. Unfortunately, he knows this." If we're not safe in our office towers, I don't see why celebrities should be safe anywhere. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: US Invades Georgia, Accidentally Bombs PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:33:07 PM ----- BODY: US Invades Georgia, Accidentally Bombs Carter Center Not in my wildest Cold Warrior dreams back in '84 did I ever think we'd have units speckled about the vast spaces of Soviet Central Asia. And now we might be sending up to 200 soldiers to help out in post-Soviet Georgia in the Caucasus, too. The Los Angeles Times reports that Georgia President (and former Soviet foreign minister) Eduard Sheverdnaze has asked for US assistance in battling al Qaeda, and President Bush has agreed. However, no formal agreement has been worked out. Also, no word yet on exactly how fast Stalin is spinning in his grave. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "Jurassic Park: Special Edition" Will PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:38:07 PM ----- BODY: "Jurassic Park: Special Edition" Will Be Much Less Exciting This from the Washington Post: T-Rex wasn't so fast, after all. There's a whole bunch of science stuff involved, but biomechanist John R Hutchinson thinks Tyrannosaurus Rex was a slow walker, and not much of a runner. The six-year-old in me refuses to believe it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: One of These Things Is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 12:57:02 PM ----- BODY: One of These Things Is Not Like the Other David Broder in today's Washington Post: "What has happened, I think, is that the war on terrorism has so overshadowed everything else in the news from Washington that other subjects have virtually disappeared." The "other subjects" so important to Broder are the silly education reform law recently signed by President Bush, campaign finance reform, and state budget problems. The education law won't accomplish anything, Americans have never considered CFR important (and rightly so), and state budgets will be quickly fixed by the improving economy. So, yeah, we're still fucking "fixated" on the damn war that's blowing up our financial centers. The question isn't why Red America thinks the war is so important, the question is how David Broder can think his little nip'n'tuck policy wonk issues are. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit: Episode II -- the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 03:03:04 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit: Episode II -- the Next Round Back from running some errands -- and with big news for fanboys like myself. AICN got hold of the script for the new Star Wars flick. Verdict? "Oh hell yes!" seems to sum up the reaction. Check it out if you're interested. Meantime, cut me some slack. I was an eight-year-old boy when the first movie came out, and I got hooked young. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Still Not as Cool PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 03:07:23 PM ----- BODY: But Still Not as Cool as the New Star Wars Pejman Yousefzadeh doesn't just take down Noam Chomsky's latest idiocy, he looks at our real-life Ellsworth Toohey's entire history. Go there. Now. Click already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Friedman Can't Figure Out PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 04:25:38 PM ----- BODY: Tom Friedman Can't Figure Out This Stuff? The more I look at Saudi Crown Prince Abdullah's Middle East Peace Plan, the better it looks for Israel to return to its 1973 borders. Yes, I am just being an ass -- because the plan is so flawed as to be worthless. There are only three reasons why the diplomats are all scurrying around so busily, depending on their nationality: Americans: Setting the Plan up for a fall so we can get back to the business of supporting Israel. Arabs: Setting the Plan up for a fall so they can get back to the business of killing Jews. Europeans: Setting the Plan up for a fall so they can get back to the business of pretending the Arabs aren't killing Jews. Did I miss anything? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And You Thought You Were PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 04:29:47 PM ----- BODY: And You Thought You Were Enraged Before I had no idea such a thing was even possible. So revolting, I won't even type the words. Fortunately, Megan McArdle already did. Read it if you dare. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: For Nation-States, They're 0-22. This PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 04:41:01 PM ----- BODY: For Nation-States, They're 0-22. This from AP: "Residents of Islamic countries harbor deep resentment toward the United States." Let's face it, the Arab world (not Islam) resents any culture technologically sophisticated enough to build a power plant without foreign assistance. From the splendor of the Caliphate, the Arab world has descended into the only region of the world other than sub-Saharan Africa better known for violence and mineral deposits than for any modern achievement. And let's be honest -- early Caliphate culture owes most of its advances to the Greek world they plundered. Also, that was an unfair comparison to southern Africa, because up until just 150 years ago, the climate and flora and fauna there made most any kind of permanent settlement impossible. Anything more the 20 miles from the coast, anyway. Indonesia, the world's most populous Muslim nation is struggling -- but still far more advanced than, say, Syria. I'd rather spend time in Iran (before or after the current abberation-as-government) than Iraq. And Turkey strikes me as a better place to plant roots than Libya. The only halfway decent Arab nations are the oil-soaked sandblots so rich as to count less as nations and more as investment banks in really big desert office parks. What's wrong with the Arab world? And how can we fix it before they start blowing us up again? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Did I Miss Something? Another PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 04:56:09 PM ----- BODY: Did I Miss Something? Another story from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Internet News Source Is Another Man's Painful Urination"), this time on reward money for the barbarians who kidnapped and murdered Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl. Washington is offering $5 million for their capture, more than enough money to turn heads in Karachi. Interesting, I suppose. But what I'd really like to know is how well is the WSJ planning on taking care of Pearl's widow, Mariane? Anyone have any info on this at all? UPDATE: Juan Gato alerted me to the following from today's Best of the Web: Editor's Note Dow Jones & Co. has established a fund for the benefit of murdered reporter Daniel Pearl's widow, Mariane Pearl, and their son, with an initial contribution of $100,000. Please note that contributions are not tax-deductible. If you'd like to donate, you can send a check to: The Daniel Pearl Memorial Trust c/o Robert J. Laughlin, Vice President J.P. Morgan Trust Company of Delaware 500 Stanton Christiana Road - 2/CS Newark, DE 19713 I urge all of you who are able to do so to make at least a small contribution. Thank you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Insanity In any culture PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 05:55:39 PM ----- BODY: Just Insanity In any culture with too many young men with access to neither jobs nor women, I can understand why a certain number will blow themselves up and take out a pizza joint with them. Add in the age-old sport of slaughtering Jews, and that explains a lot of what goes on in the Middle East. But what kind of a sick excuse for a culture sends out its women to do such idiocy? I'm no sexist, but any culture not at least minimally protective of women and children is ultimately self-genocidal. As I tried to explore a couple posts ago, there's something very, very wrong and very, very sick at the heart of Arab culture. Either they root it out themselves as I'm sure they're able, we root it out for them as I damn well know we're able, or eventually the whole damn planet gets blown up. I only wish I were exaggerating. Now it's time to rub the cat's belly, listen to some purrs, and feel better for a few minutes. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Apparently, It Doesn't Translate Well PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 06:07:30 PM ----- BODY: Apparently, It Doesn't Translate Well Timeless political questions -- answered by the US Consitution, courtesy of The Times (UK). ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: World Ends. Details at 11. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 06:14:16 PM ----- BODY: World Ends. Details at 11. Proof of the power of idiocy was found last week when my beloved Denver Broncos released star linebacker Bill Romanowski. And now we have proof of the manifestation of pure evil right here on earth -- Romo will be play next year for the evilscumsuckingawfulvile Oakland Raiders. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Oxymoron, with the Accent on PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 06:36:13 PM ----- BODY: Oxymoron, with the Accent on Moron Why is it the more Ev upgrades Blogger, the more it degrades? Details just as soon as we're finished dropping bricks on our toes, and other activites less frustrating than Blogger. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Only Difference Will Be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 07:10:10 PM ----- BODY: The Only Difference Will Be The Reliability It's official -- VodkaPundit is changing barstools. Shortly, you can find all the same general uselessness at http://www.vodkapundit.com I'm going to try to miss Bloggers ups and downs, but not very hard. Details later. UPDATE: From the VodkaPundit conspiracy department. Could Blogger's troubles be part of an evil plot to first addict people to blogging, then encourage them to swtich to a paid ISP by denying them their drug of choice? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Their Game -- But PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 08:32:57 PM ----- BODY: It's Their Game -- But It's Still Our Bat and Ball New stuff from StratFor, by way of WorldNetDaily. Ethnic Pushtuns are being forced from northern Afghanistan as local warlords move to crush pockets of potential resistance. The new violence is a significant step toward increasing the power of local warlords, at the interim government's expense. This should come as no surprise. Remember, we came to destroy the Taliban and root out al Qaeda, not to conquor and govern Afghanistan. Removing the Pushtun population from northern Afghanistan is a way to consolidate power and squelch potential rebellion against the ruling warlords before it happens. It also is a big step in consolidating the power of regional warlords, thus decreasing the influence of Afghanistan's fledgling central government and contributing to the de facto partitioning of the country. Again, no surprise. Left to their own devices, this is how Afghans run their country. "Afghanistan" is more a geographic expression or a wishful thought than it is a nation-state. Or to borrow a phrase I coined for Somalia years ago, Afghanistan is a place on the map where other coutries aren't. A weakened central government will become increasingly irrelevant as outside powers choose to do business with local warlords or their external sponsors, such as Iran, Pakistan and Uzbekistan. Does this matter? So long as each little warlord plays by our rules so far as al Qaeda and other terrorists go, then we shouldn't be displeased. We can always use money to keep the various locals in line -- or play them off one another. And don't worry too much about Iranian influence. They won't be a problem terribly much longer. Back to StratFor for a moment. When it first started up and was free, I recieved their daily newsletter. They have sometimes excellent analysis, and, apparently, some pretty damn good sources. They'll be publishing weekdays on WorldNet, so you might consider visiting and bookmarking. I just did. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit Nominates Self for Secretary PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/27/2002 08:56:38 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit Nominates Self for Secretary of Pampering Via InstaPundit: Condoleezza Rice for President in 2008? I think I speak for male hawks with good taste everywhere when I say, "Finally, a President I can hit on." You Bellicose Women can still get all dreamy over Rummy, don't worry. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bet He Knows How to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:03:14 AM ----- BODY: Bet He Knows How to Squeal Like a Pig Eric Alterman proves as eager as ever to bend over – sans lube – for those who would and will kill Americans. Sorry if the image was a little too unsettling for breakfast, but so is Alterman’s latest idiocy for MSNBC. NOTE: Even with Norton Firewall set to allow all content from MSNBC, I still can’t access the site’s main opinion page without disabling my hacker protection. I can only conclude that MSNBC is not a company with any concern for the privacy or computer safety of their audience. It will have to be a slow news day, such as now, before I’ll visit there again. SECOND NOTE: I will try to stop myself from now on from using “Deliverance” references before lunchtime. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Word You’re Looking for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:06:26 AM ----- BODY: The Word You’re Looking for Is “Vitriol” Anna Quindlen, cribbing from Marxist shrewpixie Eleanor Clift’s notes (hah! Clift’s notes, I kill me), is the latest in a series of Cowardly Women to accuse President Bush of using the War on Terror as a Wag the Dog for November’s midterm elections, and his own re-election in 2004. When the president first used the phrase “axis of evil” in the State of the Union address, it smelled of the speechwriter. That’s OK; many of the most memorable oratorical flourishes of the last century were crafted by writers but ascribed to their political masters. But as the weeks have passed, the repeated use of the term to describe Iran, Iraq and North Korea has begun to stink of spin. That’s par for the course, too; political speeches usually have political aims. But this is the wrong time and this is the wrong issue on which to use fighting words for political gain. At least Clift had the good taste to sneak up on the issue. Not Quindlen. She comes at you with the Shaggy Dog using all the subtlety of a rectal exam administered by Andre the Giant. I’ll skip ahead now to the very end, since the middle is as padded with lo-cal nothings as Anna’s hips. If, as another bit of presidential phrasemaking has it, the only thing we have to fear is fear itself, America is in deep trouble. The American people are afraid. They are afraid of additional acts of terrorism, of always looking over their shoulder on planes and in skyscrapers. They are afraid that huge corporate entities that once promised secure employment and investments are hollow at the core. And they are afraid their children face a future far less certain and far more terrifying than the past. That is the crisis that grips this country. Attempting to answer it by using saber-rattling to attack an amorphous axis of enemies is a great failure of leadership. Much greater than not knowing how to scan a box of cereal in the supermarket. America is in deep trouble. We’re in a war we didn’t start, sprung on us in a surprise attack that killed 3,000 civilians. We are rightly afraid of everything Quindlen describes. But the fear is not the damn crisis. The crisis is that the bad guys – mostly in the form of three nation-states forming an Axis of Evil – are still out there, waiting to kill more of us. Yes, Anna, I’m more afraid of Saddam Hussein, and of Iran’s terrorist clients, and North Korea’s missiles than I am of George W. Bush. NOTE: "Cowardly Women" is meant to stand in stark contrast to our many proud Bellicose Women, and not to deman women in general. I am still aiming to get married come August. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Although It’d Be Fine If PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:19:51 AM ----- BODY: Although It’d Be Fine If They Banned Andrew Lloyd Weber Britain is set to become, well, a little less British. From The Guardian (where else?) comes tale that Tony Blair will finally allow his New Labour to get back to the old business of banning fox hunting. I can’t say I much care for the activity. Just doesn’t appeal to me. I could understand it better if foxes were tasty or endangered or looked more like Eric Alterman, but – but it’s not my country and it’s not my culture. So what business is it of mine if they do ban fox hunting? Britain no longer has an Empire on Which the Sun Never Sets. Britain is no longer the world’s only parliamentary monarchy. Britain is no longer leader of the Anglosphere, or owner of the mightiest navy, or the only all-volunteer army. Britain, to maintain an identity as something more than a rich, soggy island north of France, needs to cling to those traditions, those small ways, which do still make her unique. The local pub with a silly name. Darts. Soccer hooligans. Putting the letter U near the ends of words where it does no good. The monarchy. Barristers in wigs. And, yes, even fox hunting. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: At Least the Pope is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:40:36 AM ----- BODY: At Least the Pope is No Racist Pope John Paul II, now so senile as to sound like Pat Buchanan, claims that abortion could lead to the fall of democracy. Continuing to mumble, the pontiff went on to accuse halitosis of starting World War I, and laid blame for the fall of Classical Greece square at the feet of meningitis. When an especially sharp reporter pointed out to John Paul that meningitis has no feet, the Pope shrugged and asked for a cookie. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Not Every Movie Is Rated PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:49:46 AM ----- BODY: Not Every Movie Is Rated G Reuters (Motto: "One Man's International News Agency Is Another Man's Oozing Sore") reports that a 9/11 victim's group is asking that CBS not air the more graphic footage captured by a French film crew at the Twin Towers just before the collapse. CBS plans to air a special based partly on the footage March 10. I'm of mixed feelings about this. I'm not sure I want to see anything quite that brutal -- but I also don't think my feelings (and they are just feelings) should deny to others what should prove to be a powerful viewing experience. Also, I'm damn sure we're grown up enough as a nation to do so. This isn't the Daniel Pearl video, which primarily effects only his widow, and which can only provide some sick voyeuristic thrill. The horrors of 9/11 are national horrors that drew us all into war. I feel for the families. But I can't argue that their feelings should count any more than anyone else's. Only facts matter, and those should be in plain television view come March 10. Your thoughts? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Holy Shit No Way Department PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 01:23:09 AM ----- BODY: Holy Shit No Way Department Our most literary prose blogger, Ken Layne, is now the ninth most-linked anything in the Blogosphere. Congrats, Ken. I don't know if there's any money, but you certainly deserve it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bitch Moan Whine Insomnia and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 11:50:26 AM ----- BODY: Bitch Moan Whine Insomnia and phone calls interrupting what little sleep I did get -- you'll understand the slow start today. Hang in there -- I'm up now and the caffeine is kicking in. Can I beat the Prof three days running on just four hours sleep? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Of Course We're Lost -- PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:08:55 PM ----- BODY: Of Course We're Lost -- You Ate the Map Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Shin Splints") brings word that Tom Daschle is "disappointed" in the way President Bush is handling the war effort. OK, so Daschle didn't say "disappointed," but only because he forgot is notecards. Instead, the South Dakota senator said "the war lacks "clear direction." Tom, first you say you don't like the very clear direction (Axis of Evil) that Bush signaled last month, now you claim there is no direction. Which is it? Is there an Axis of Evil or a formless void? You make the call. Worse than Daschle's idiocy, which was nothing more than political opportunism, was the Republican response. Mississippi Senator Trent Lott shot back with, "How dare [he] criticize President Bush while we are fighting our war." There you have it -- instead simply calling out Daschle on the facts (as this blog was able to do on little sleep and half a cup of coffee), Republicans are simply going to respond to any criticism with thinly veiled charges of treason. Tell me again why I argued last week in favor of having two strong political parties? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Bother Telling Me If PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:19:50 PM ----- BODY: Don't Bother Telling Me If They Threaten to Hold Their Breath Ananova reports (link from Drudge) that 300 Camp X-Ray prisoners are on a hunger strike. Fine. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If There Is a God, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:25:45 PM ----- BODY: If There Is a God, He Has a Strong Sense of Irony Ya gotta love Dennis Miller. Really. Except for his Monday Night Football gig. Made me think that MNF was finally played out. Words fail to describe just how amazingly terribly bad he was. SNL Weekend Update? Loved it. The Dennis Miller Show? Where do you think VodkaPundit learned to rant. MNF? Fuggidabboudit. So I read a minute ago that Miller is out. Gone. Fired. Back to HBO with thee. Then I read that he might be replaced septuagenarian summer sausage John Madden. Is there no justice to be found here on this Earth? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Not a Job With a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:34:36 PM ----- BODY: Not a Job With a Good Severance Package, Unless You Meant a Severed Head Eqyptian President Hosni Mubarak is poo-pooing the Saudi "peace plan" for the Middle East. For those with bad memories or strong yawn reflexes, Crown Prince Abdullah's Big Idea was for Israel to pull back to its near-indefensible 1967 borders and to pretend the last 35 years never happened, in exchange for vague Arab promises of somethingorother. But I doubt Mubarak is dismissing the plan because he knows it can't or won't work. You don't stay in power long in a country like Egypt without having a strong sense of how policies will play out politically at home. I think Mubarak knows that his people are frustrated with the "Cold Peace" they already have with Israel, and any further overtures could find him out of a job. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Nothing Going on Here. Details PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:39:21 PM ----- BODY: Nothing Going on Here. Details at Six. There were Grammys last night, and, as I understand, some winners. I'd love to give you witty commentary or a funny rundown, but I quit listening to the radio (and almost all new music) when I left the business almost ten years ago. Working at Top 40 stations for four years can do that to you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Now That's What I Call PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 12:46:21 PM ----- BODY: Now That's What I Call Unbiased Reporting Good economic news from the New York Times. Propelled by strong consumer spending and leftover "Clinton-era policies," the "Bush recession" may be over. OK, they didn't actually say that, but they sure as hell wanted to. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Do They Not Even Read PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 01:02:56 PM ----- BODY: Do They Not Even Read Their Own Paper? More economic idiocy from the NYT. Just read the lead: "Ten years ago, in the economic boom after German reunification, nothing seemed capable of stopping this country." Actually, they're thinking of 1940 and the Ardennes forest. Go back to 1989, and you'll find plenty of economists (admittedly of the Chicago or Austrian schools) who said (out loud even) that Germany's tightly regulated markets, constrictive labor laws, and generous welfare benefits would lead to exactly the sort of high-unemployment, economic stalemate they've experienced the last few years. Even in growth times, Germany experiences unemployments rates close to double digits. Next sentence: "Now, nothing seems capable of starting it up." Have the Germans tried repealing regulations, or relaxing union control of industry, or paring down unemployment benefits? Until they've tried all three (and in the order I listed) then no one can claim that "nothing" will lift Germany out of recession. It gets better: "Germany's long-term pattern resembles a much milder version of the stagnation Japan is going through — economic anemia at home, unhealthy dependence on exports, a paralyzing culture of consensus decision-making and an inability to carry out much-needed financial and economic changes." I'll be taking on Japan later this afternoon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Is All Tongue-in-Cheek, Right? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 01:13:20 PM ----- BODY: This Is All Tongue-in-Cheek, Right? Andrew Dodge attacks the Prof again! From today's DodgeBlog: It would be most amusing to find out that the way of getting brownie points with the Prof, if your[sic] his student, is to put in a few hours surfing the net for good stuff. That would explain some of the eclectic nature of some of the links. Andrew, what about the eclectic nature of the stuff you'll find right here? I don't have any students, just too much free time and too big a mouth. It can be done as a solo effort, especially when you have Glenn's readership. He gets a lot of emails from people with tips. In fact, I seem to recall a little brouhaha between Andrew and the Prof about that very issue not so long ago... I think someone is playing class clown, trying to get teacher's attention again. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Return of the Living Dead PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 01:23:52 PM ----- BODY: Return of the Living Dead Severed Penis Part III Emily Jones, my favorite Bellicose Girl (her word!) sends me comedy gold from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Global News Gatherer Is Another Man's Kindey Punch"). That's right, kids -- The Case of the Severed Penis has been solved. A lingering mystery involving what appeared to be a severed human penis found in a Nebraska car wash has been solved, police have said, with tests showing the organ was a cow's teat. Yeah, they were certain even at first that whatever it was, it hadn't been circumcised. "I've learned more about cow parts and human parts in the past two weeks than I cared to," said Police Chief Larry Thoren. Thoren went on to say, "Them cows is smart -- they got teats. 'Ceptin they sometimes look like a male organ. Can I say 'male organ' in a family paper?" Police launched a possible homicide investigation after the part was found near a vacuum cleaner at a car wash in Hastings on February 12. Local medical officials said they thought it resembled a human penis and it was sent off to a state crime laboratory for further tests. Industrial vacuum cleaners... mystery flesh must be severed male human penis body part... What do Nebraska cops do in their lonely free time that would make them jump to such a conclusion? Thoren said test results showed it to be a cow's teat, nothing udder. Do yourself a favor and leave the jokes to the Bloggers, pal. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Best Google Ever Top this PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 01:30:26 PM ----- BODY: Best Google Ever Top this one, fellow Bloggers. I just scored fifth for "funny pictures of khamenei." I don't know who was looking for those pictures, but I'd like to shake their hand. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Japan, Inc. East Asian Enron? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 02:28:46 PM ----- BODY: Japan, Inc. East Asian Enron? From the Washington Post: "One week after assuring President Bush of his determination to press ahead with painful economic reforms, Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi unveiled an 'anti-deflation' package that promised stricter bank inspections and signaled government willingness to use taxpayer money to shore up troubled lenders. But the plan, released late Wednesday after a meeting of a Koizumi's council of economic advisors, drew mostly scorn from analysts and investors, many of whom dismissed it as a vague restatement of current policies." There you have it. Koizumi, the supposed Elvis of Japanese politics, turns out to be the fat, lazy Elvis of the Vegas years. That's all he could come up with? Nope. Everyone in Japan knows what must be done: Write off bad debt, allow bad banks to fail, provide an RTC-type corporation to deal with any assets, and deregulate farms and the consumer economy. Tall order? You bet. But not one person of any political influence in Japan, not even their hip, new Prime Minister, is willing to lay even one of those cards on the table. To make matters worse, he's promising even more money (which the government doesn't have) to continue to prop up rickety banks. As a result, Japan is being industrially "hollowed out." Sure, we lose jobs to China and Mexico and everywhere else -- but we lose the low profit margin, low labor skill, can-build-it-most-anywhere jobs. Sorry, textile workers and get screwed, Pat Buchanan -- we don't need domestic sweaters that badly for the Gap. the jobs we keep here are in computers and aviation and ideas. These are the steel mills and coal plants of the 21ist Century. Japan, however, is losing its entire industrial base -- to China, South Korea, and elsewhere -- because they are unwilling to take the necessary steps to save their economy. So how do we fix Japan? We can't. And the whole world is going to pay a big price. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Germany, Japan, now China Today's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 03:40:06 PM ----- BODY: Germany, Japan, now China Today's StratFor, via WorldNetDaily. In agreement with VodkaPundit -- I've made the same case here and here -- Stratfor predicts big trouble ahead for the Chinese Communist Party. As it continues to integrate with the global economy, Beijing's struggle to balance economic reforms with social stability is growing increasingly difficult....Beijing is extremely concerned that China's growing ranks of unemployed may become an unmanageable problem that would create social disorder and undermine the nation's economic reform programs – which are intended to engender national strength and stability. China has 300 million unemployed. That's 20 million more than we have people, total, in this country. What isn't mentioned is that China's banks are involvent, so even those with jobs have their entire life savings at risk. The question, StratFor realizes, is whether China's economic modernization can produce results fast enough to stave off disaster. Can reforms create enough jobs and rescue the banks before the unrest the reforms create topples Beijing? It's more than a little like flooring the gas pedal when the gas gauge is on zero, to get you to the gas station sooner. Can China make it work? StratFor doesn't know and neither do you or I. Here's a trivia question for you history buffs: Has China ever peacefully changed governments? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Saving Private Ryan from Calais PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 03:47:07 PM ----- BODY: Saving Private Ryan from Calais Steven Den Beste with an excellent look at Operation Fortitude and the "closure" of OSI. Read it and smile. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's Not a Wonderbra, She's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 03:52:37 PM ----- BODY: That's Not a Wonderbra, She's Just Happy About the News Natalija Radic with news out of Bosnia that I haven't seen here yet. Mass murderer Radovan Karadzic maybe about to meet his well-earned fate. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Quote of the Day Emily PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 03:57:36 PM ----- BODY: Quote of the Day Emily Jones's Hawkgirl: "I'm generally much better suited for falling off of wagons rather than jumping on them." Sadly, our favorite young'un was not speaking of drinking. Oh, wait -- she's not that young. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Omphalos Better Keep More Notes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 04:06:29 PM ----- BODY: Omphalos Better Keep More Notes Happy Fun Pundit's Steve went on a major roll yesterday, and I didn't catch it until just now. Posts include SatanWatch, Bill Clinton as a loser ex-jock, Hillary & Laura hot lesbo action (so I exaggerate), Castro & Conspiracy, and common-sense bioethics. It's like Jeopardy categories for madmen. Check it out. The only question is, when can we expect Uthant to return with fresh material? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We LOVE Typos! By the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 04:13:14 PM ----- BODY: We LOVE Typos! By the time Blogger is letting me post again, the following headline will probably be fixed. But it has to be shared. Now, for your entertainment pleasure, allow me to present the latest screw-up from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's News Service Is Another Man's Wet Hacking Cough"): White House Regrets Blaming Clinton on Mideast Apparently, Osama bin Laden had some sort of crack suicide voting squad in place in '92 and '96, stuffing ballot boxes from coast to coast. Developing... UPDATE: Four-plus hours later, and Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Typo Is Another Man's Bad Running Joke") still hasn't pulled the story or corrected the headline. Shh! No telling -- we don't ruin a good thing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Built One Rocket That PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 05:18:18 PM ----- BODY: They Built One Rocket That Surrendered to Luxembourg Finally, we may have a method of getting reliable atmospheric data. What do you want to bet that no matter what the satilite finds, the results will be used to "prove" Chicken Little assumptions about global warming and/or a new ice age? This could all be moot, however. The giant satilite is being hoisted into orbit aboard a French Ariane Five rocket -- which has a 30% failure rate. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Moving Soon -- All Sales PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 06:16:52 PM ----- BODY: Moving Soon -- All Sales Final! The lovely and talented Stacy Tabb is waiting for my new domain to go active -- then she'll be moving all this mess over to www.vodkapundit.com. So get those new bookmarks ready. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'd Rather Stub My Toe PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 06:30:44 PM ----- BODY: I'd Rather Stub My Toe Than Be Behind Someone With a Checkbook in the Express Line Sarge is back again with yet another vengeance. "I'd rather have my balls gnawed off by rabid sewer rats than go through the hassle of car buying." Only this time, Sarge does the gnawing and the dealer finds his manhood on a platter. Good reading. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Everybody Meets at #10 The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 08:38:22 PM ----- BODY: Everybody Meets at #10 The "aimless" War on Terror is taking new shape, with Tony Blair preparing his countrymen for the ouster of Saddam Hussein. Blair has not only stated that Saddam is a threat to world peace, but The Times reports that he will travel to Washington in April, "for what is increasingly being seen as a war summit." It's a shame that Blair and President Bush won't be meeting in a more storied Allied war summit town -- Casablanca. Nonetheless, I think this could be the continuation of a beautiful friendship. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 08:53:32 PM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part II From Strategy Page, we have a wish list of new toys Special Forces want after their experiences in Afghanistan: A lightweight counter-mortar radar (already in development) which can detect incoming mortar shells from any direction. This device is carried in two parts and can be assembled in 30 minutes. Officially cool. Small-unit counter-battery fire possibilities. Collapsible unmanned aerial vehicles (already in development) that can be carried in a backpack and deployed for long periods to "look over the next hill". Extremely cool. But just for Special Forces? I want one of those for spotting cops on I-25 on the way up to Denver. New laser designators that are lighter, smaller, and have longer range. Not cool. Just refinement of existing toys. Improved radios that can function in caves, in built-up areas, and over mountains. Not cool, but very, very necessary. Read more Kaplan to find out why. Small vehicles able to operate over narrow tracks and provide motorized mobility for teams. Uncool. Sounds like an old Suzuki Sidekick. Lighter and smaller batteries that last longer. Very cool. Sure to be a hit from now on at every bridal shower. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Breaking News If you're just PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 10:15:54 PM ----- BODY: Breaking News If you're just one-tenth the Letterman fan I am, go to Drudge immediately. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Holy Shit No Way Department PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 10:25:29 PM ----- BODY: Holy Shit No Way Department So I'm checking my hit counter, seeing if I'd bested yesterday's second-best-ever performance, when -- whoa! where'd those 200+ plus hits come from? Is Tim Blair reading my stuff again? Nope. I just got my paper graded by the Prof. OK, so he didn't link to one of my Special Clever Severed Penis Posts or Famous Person Pit Bull Attacks, but it's still a very nice gesture for a very young blog. Thanks, Glenn. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And You Thought the Jokes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 11:22:02 PM ----- BODY: And You Thought the Jokes Here Were Bad? Just a day after I go and write very kind words about Sine Qua Non and even blogroll Charles Austin's site -- and this is how he pays me back: "What if we could convince Stephen Green of VodkaPundit fame to toss aside his fetching fiance' and try to woo Natalie Solent of nataliesolent fame. Then she could be Natalie Solent-Green." Groan. And fat chance me ditching Melissa. If there's such a thing as soul mates... Anyway, go visit Chuck's site. He's smart and funny and all -- even if he did spend nine years down south in Allybammer. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit Is Not a Gay PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 02/28/2002 11:54:48 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit Is Not a Gay Black Man. Or at Least Not Yet. Like every Thursday night, I watched a hot'n'fresh episode of The Jack and Karen Show. Quickly, the Will & Grace Go Apartment Hunting bit was classic -- I'll never be able to hear the VodkaFiancée say "Shoes!" again without a wry smirk. But Suzanne Pleshette as Karen's mom was just... not up to par. Couldn't they have hired, oh, anyone else? Fortunately, Rosario saved that subplot from total disaster. I have a point here, I swear. It's even kind of political. So later this evening, I get an email from an old friend who I only get to see every few years. She writes: "I know why I watch the show all the time. You're just like Will, but straight." Will is smart, not bad looking, is wicked with puns, and probably too concerned with clothes. Yep, she nailed it. The cool part, my point, is this. We're now living in an age where a straight guy doesn't have to take automatic macho offense at being compared favorably to a gay character. That's progress, kids. We'll get out of these woods without Big Brother forcing us along. Now if only I could get James Earl Jones's laugh. Oh, wait -- he's black, isn't he? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don’t Answer That; It’s Rhetorical. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 12:12:12 AM ----- BODY: Don’t Answer That; It’s Rhetorical. And Depressing Could Bugs Bunny make it off the drawing board and onto movie screens in today’s PC world? Opinion Journal’s Daniel Henninger says no. What great art or entertainment is stillborn today, afraid of reprisals from some easily offended group with an axe to grind? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Überhawk Speaks It's Friday, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 12:16:12 AM ----- BODY: The Überhawk Speaks It's Friday, kids, and you know what that means -- Krauthammer! You don't need the link. Charles doesn't need the hits. But it does the soul good to praise things praiseworthy. [The French] deem it a breach of manners to call evil by its name. They prefer accommodating to it. They have lots of practice, famously accommodating Nazi Germany in 1940, less famously striking the Gaullist pose of triangulating between the evil empire and primitive Yanks during the Cold War. It just gets better. No one can beat the war drum like the Hammer. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Last Warning VodkaPundit will, Whomever PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 12:38:51 AM ----- BODY: Last Warning VodkaPundit will, Whomever willing, be moving off Blogspot today. Set those bookmarks for www.vodkapundit.com. And if you haven't bookmarked already, what are you waiting for? It's this eclectic and erudite and crass and funny and incisive every weekday. Not that I think much of my blogging or anything. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Those Paying Extra Close Attention PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 12:44:31 AM ----- BODY: Those Paying Extra Close Attention Will Get It I can't bear to count it up myself, Richard. Did I get the trifecta? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Update Those Bookmarks It's official. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 12:55:08 PM ----- BODY: Update Those Bookmarks It's official. We're up and running at www.VodkaPundit.com. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go try to shake off the aftereffects of my trip to the dentist. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Socking It to the Rich PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 02:55:34 PM ----- BODY: Socking It to the Rich I think it was Cornelius Vanderbilt who, when confronted by a reporter to share his wealth, pushed a dime at the scribe and said, "There's your share. Now get out." That came to mind reading the AP write-up of the Forbes 2002 billionaire list. There's a real gem buried in the second paragraph, but I think I'm the first to see it: The world's distinct club of billionaires dropped 83 members this year to 497 as recession and fallout from the terrorist attacks reduced their wealth. The group's combined worth fell to $1.54 trillion from $1.73 trillion last year, according to Forbes magazine's 16th annual ranking of billionaires released Thursday. If you took every billionaire from every country in the world, and stripped from them every penny they're worth -- from stock portfolios, to homes, to yachts, to loose change -- then you could pay for nine months of the United States federal government. Nine months, that's it. Or at least that's what I come up with when I divide 1.54 trillion into 2.1 trillion. Close enough for cocktails. And you could only do it once, because after that there would be no more billionaires. Now will someone please whack Bill Clinton over the head with a major metropolitan phone book? NOTE: I'm still tired and I'm still cranky and my mouth still hurts. I'll post as I'm able. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Pissed Off Again Austin PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 03:07:40 PM ----- BODY: He's Pissed Off Again Austin Bay is not, as one supposed wit claimed, "the poor man's Charles Krauthammer." He's a damn fine writer and, for my money, better educated on strictly military issues. He's also oftentimes the writing partner of James Dunnigan, who helped invent modern war-gaming. Bay has a new syndacated column posted at Strategy Page that I urge you to read. Writing on the murderers of Daniel Pearl: Here's the agitprop intent of this terror "propaganda by deed" followed by video replay: "The World Trade Center was terror en masse, our 'execution' of Mr. Pearl is terror in the particular. America and the West, you must continue to fear us." Daniel Pearl died with the words "I am a Jew, and my father was a Jew," on his lips. I have no religion. I have no faith. But I do have beliefs and I understand the power of beliefs -- and Pearl did not sound like a frightened man to me. Not frightened in any fundamental sense. So I ask you -- are you frightened of the barbarians who slit the throat of a man in shackles? I'm not. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Not Too Shabby for a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 03:15:49 PM ----- BODY: Not Too Shabby for a Slightly Tipsy Insomniac Two mentions from the Prof in less than 12 hours? I might have to take up a god of some sort, after all. Seriously, Glenn -- thanks again for the kind words. And it's not really about the number of posts, is it? I thought it was the length that mattered. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Ominous Parellels Hitler Youth PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 03:22:46 PM ----- BODY: The Ominous Parellels Hitler Youth and the Antiglobos -- separated at birth? An excellent find by Ozman Tim Blair. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Joe Bob Says Check It PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 03:39:02 PM ----- BODY: Joe Bob Says Check It Out Reviews coming in of We Were Soldiers are uniformly good (pun only somewhat intended). I read the book a few years back. The full title is We Were Soldiers Once... And Young. I wish they'd kept it for the movie. You see, I know you're not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but those six words conveyed to me, the civilian, something of the real horror of war. The heartbreak. The robber of youth. Or at least that's what I thought before reading the book itself. Powerful stuff. If you know history, you know how it ends. But go see the movie anyway. And then go read the book. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Letters, We Get Letters Sorry PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 03:46:07 PM ----- BODY: Letters, We Get Letters Sorry for the all-caps, but other than to eliminate annoying line breaks, I have done no editing. So, in its entirety: PROPOSAL FOR PARTICIPATORY FINANCIAL TRANSACTION I WOULD LIKE TO FIRSTLY SEND TO YOU THE BEST WISHES OF GOOD HEALTH AND SUCCESS IN YOUR PURSUITS PARTICULARLY THROUGH MY PROPOSAL AS CONTAINED IN THIS EMAIL. BEFORE GOING INTO DETAILS OF MY PROPOSAL TO YOU, I MUST FIRST SOLICIT YOU TO TREAT IT WITH UTMOST CONFIDENTIALITY, AS THIS IS REQUIRED FOR ITS SUCCESS. I GOT YOUR NAME AND E-MAIL ADDRESS, WHILE SURFING ON THE INTERNET FOR A RELIABLE AND TRUSTING PERSON. WHO ARE SENIOR OFFICIALS OF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT OF NIGERIA'S CONTRACTS REVIEW PANEL AND WE ARE INTERESTED IN DIVERTING SOME FUNDS THAT ARE PRESENTLY FLOATING IN THE SUSPENCE ACCOUNT OF THE FEDERAL PAY OFFICE. IN ORDER TO COMMENCE THIS TRANSACTION, WE SOLICITFOR YOUR ASSISTANCE TO ENABLE US TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNT THE SAID FLOATING FUNDS.WE ARE DETERMINED TO CONCLUDE THE TRANSFER AS SOON AS POSSIBLE . THE SOURCE OF THE FUNDS ARE AS FOLLOWS: DURING THE LAST ABACHA MILITARY REGIME IN NIGERIA, GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS SET UP COMPANIES AND AWARDED CONTRACTS TO THEIR OWN COMPANIES, THESE CONTRACTS WERE GROSSLY OVER-INVOICED IN VARIOUS MINISTRIES AND PARASTATALS. THE PRESENT OBASANJO GOVERNMENT SET UP CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL WHICH HAS THE MANDATE TO USE THE INSTRUMENTS OF PAYMENT MADE AVAILABLE TO IT BY THE DECREE SETTING UP THE PANEL,TO REVIEW THESE CONTRACTS AND IF NECESSARY PAY THOSE WHO ARE BEING OWED OUTSTANDING AMOUNTS.MY COLLEAGUES AND I HAVE IDENTIFIED QUITE A HUGE SUM OF THIS FUNDS WHICH ARE CURRENTLY FLOATING IN THE FEDERAL PAY OFFICE READY FOR DISBURSEMENT AND WOULD LIKE TO DIVERT SOME OF IT FOR OUR OWN PURPOSES. HOWEVER, BY VIRTUE OF OUR POSITION AS CIVIL; SERVANTS AND MEMBER OF THIS PANEL, WE CANNOT ACQUIRE THESE FUNDS IN OUR NAMES OR IN THE NAMES OF COMPANIES THAT ARE BASED IN NIGERIA. I HAVE THEREFORE BEEN MANDATED, AS A MATTER OF TRUST BY MY COLLEAGUES IN THE PANEL, TO LOOK FOR A RELIABLE OVERSEAS PARTNER INTO WHOSE ACCOUNT WE CAN TRANSFER THE SUM OF U.S$30,000,000.00[THIRTY MILLION,U.S DOLLARS]. THAT IS WHY AM SENDING YOU THIS EMAIL. WE HAVE AGREED TO SHARE THE MONEY TO BE TRANSFERRED INTO YOUR ACCOUNT,IF YOU AGREE WITH OUR PROPOSITION AS FOLLOWS, (a) 20% TO THE ACCOUNT OWNER (YOU) (b) 70% FOR US (MY COLLEAGUES AND I) (c) 10% TO BE USED IN SETTLING ALL EXPENSES (BY BOTH YOU AND US) INCIDENTAL TO THE ACTUALIZATION OF THIS PROJECT.WE WISH TO INVEST OUR SHARE OF THE PROCEEDS OF THIS PROJECT IN FOREIGN STOCK MARKETS, PROPERTIES AND OTHER BUSINESS TILL WE ARE READY AND ABLE TO HAVE ACCESS TO THEM WITHOUT RAISING ANY EYEBROWS HERE AT HOME. PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS TRANSACTION IS 100% SAFE AND RISK FREE.WE TEND TO EFFECT THE TRANSFER WITHIN FOURTEEN WORKING DAYS FROM THE DAYS OF RECEIPT OF THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION THROUGH MY E-MAIL ADDRESS. YOUR COMPANY'S NAME, ADDRESS, PHONE AND FAX NUMBERS, YOUR BANK'S NAME AND ADDRESS, PHONE/FAX NUMBERS, TELEX AND THE ACCOUNT NUMBER INTO WHICH THE FUNDS SHOULD BE PAID.THE ABOVE INFORMATION WILL ENABLE US WRITE LETTERS OF CLAIM AND JOB DESCRIPTION RESPECTIVELY.THIS WAY, WE WILL USE YOUR COMPANY'S NAME TO APPLY FOR THE PAYMENT AND BACKDATE THE AWARD OF THE CONTRACT TO YOUR COMPANY. WE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO DOING THIS TRANSACTION WITH YOU AND WE SOLICIT YOUR UTMOST CONFIDENTIALITY IN THIS TRANSACTION.I WILL BRING YOU INTO A MORE DETAIL PICTURE OF THIS TRANSACTION WHEN I HEAR FROM YOU. BEST REGARDS, DELE JOHNSON. Let's see -- I give you total access to my banking and you'll give me money? I know better than to look a gift horse in the mouth, but I can smell the rotten Denmark on its breath from here. Seriously, I appreciate up front, in your face efforts to fleece people. So much better than all that tacky grifting. If you get fun emails like this, send'em on over to me. This could be fun. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Where Would He Put PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 04:03:15 PM ----- BODY: But Where Would He Put It? Dave Tepper -- a fellow Child of the '80s -- has an excellent take on baby screening, carry-on baggage, abortion, and lefty nutjobs. Double Extra Bonus Brownie Points to Dave for being one of the few brave enough to say he's "pro-abortion," not just pro-choice. My cowardly self prefers to say that I'll be qualified to hold an opinion on the subject just as soon as I get a uterus. Anyway, go read Dave. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Collect the Whole Set If PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 04:06:48 PM ----- BODY: Collect the Whole Set If you haven't already, read the first item in today's Best of the Web. James Taranto does the dirty work of collecting and collating all the anti-war nonsense coming out of the Senate this week. It might go better with an after work cocktail, just so you're warned. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Can't All God's Peggys and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 04:16:39 PM ----- BODY: Can't All God's Peggys and Jonahs Just Get Along? Peggy Noonan asks why Aaron Sorkin shouldn't tell us exactly what he thinks of President Bush. Jonah Goldberg answers because Sorkin is a liar of Clintonian proportions. Both are good reads. I agree with them both. My world would have less static if Sorkin finally shut the hell up. But I'd also lose some really good material. (Actually, I think I'm the only one who found SorkinWatch amusing.) ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Did Jimmy Crack Corn PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 04:28:53 PM ----- BODY: But Did Jimmy Crack Corn Care? I'm going to stop going to the dentist if it makes me miss columns like the latest from Victor Davis Hanson at NRO. I'm halfway tempted to change the name of this place to HippocleidesPundit. I'm also not going to try to tease you into reading it with some snipped passages or attempts at pithy comments. I can't make a recommendation higher than that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Raised Glass Salute I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/01/2002 04:33:49 PM ----- BODY: A Raised Glass Salute I forgot to publicly thank Stacy Tabb for quickly and seamlessly moving this site to its new home. The look of this site is deceptively simple for the work she put into it. You can view more of her stuff at Sekimori, and visit her fresh & funny blog by following the other Sekimori link down in my blogroll. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Ouch In retrospect, the cocktails PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 09:44:01 AM ----- BODY: Ouch In retrospect, the cocktails after we finished the third bottle of wine were probably ill-considered. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It Is a Growth, and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 09:51:17 AM ----- BODY: It Is a Growth, and the Economy is Happy to See You Good look at the new resiliency of the US economy from the Wall Street Journal. Don't worry -- it's in the free section. I don't subscribe anymore, either. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Usual Horribleness, Part 1,000,006 PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 09:55:32 AM ----- BODY: The Usual Horribleness, Part 1,000,006 It's getting so ugly in Israel, that I'm considering hooking the office TV back up so I can get info faster than my news web sites. Some real commentary on Israel and the Palestinians in just a bit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blog, Blog is Better Than PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 10:06:50 AM ----- BODY: Blog, Blog is Better Than War, War I've long given up over the Bush Administration having guts enough to follow my Iran First, Then Iraq strategy. But if the noises coming out of #10 can be relied on, then at least we'll be doing something constructive. And soon, too. George Will examines how a Modified Afghanistan approach might work in the first half of his Sunday column. Wishful thinking, sound strategy, or road to no where? You make the call. NOTE: Double Extra Brownie Deluxe Bonus Points to anyone who can explain the headline to this story. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Let Us Know Best wishes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 10:13:28 AM ----- BODY: Let Us Know Best wishes and high hopes for Tim Blair's sister, Diane. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Economic Literacy The Bush Administration PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:10:24 AM ----- BODY: Economic Literacy The Bush Administration is considering slapping big tarriffs on imported steel in a vain attempt to save a dying industry -- and a flagrant attempt to buy votes in northereastern states. As described by the New York Times, the plan would spare the poorest steel exporters, harm some of our most important allies, and exempt Canada and Mexico. I guess that last part is a reluctant admission that we do, after all, have a little free trade agreement with those two nations. The steel industry is dying in this country. Some minimills will survive to serve local needs, but the big boys are toast. Attempts to merge into even bigger boys is less about economies of scale than they are about scaling up political clout. My grandfather used to own and run Southwest Steel -- a small steel service company -- in St. Louis. Even he admits that he got out at "just the right time," because "the margins were shot." That was ten years ago, and in the higher-margin steel service business, not steel making. Labor union noises to the contrary, manufacturing jobs are usually low skill -- which means they can be done anywhere and by anybody. In that situation, the country with the lowest labor costs will generally get the low skill jobs. That ain't the US, kids. We won't even pick our own lettuce -- so it won't be long before we won't make our own steel. If the Administration forges ahead with its plan, the price of steel could shoot up 10%. That's a ten percent price hike in material cost for everything made from steel. The Administration buying votes in Pennsylvania and Ohio will be paid for out of the pockets of car buyers in Colorado and kitchen appliance salesmen in Minnesota. All for a temporary gain for a dying industry. Writing about the damn war is less depressing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Pow, Right to the Moon PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:18:03 AM ----- BODY: Pow, Right to the Moon It used to be that scientific advances from the space race eventually filtered down to consumers. Little things like, oh, anything smaller, faster, lighter. PCs, for example. And now consumer tech filters upward to NASA. When we start seeing much prettier pictures from Hubble, it will be thanks to the ongoing revolution in digital cameras. A nice antidote to a bad news day. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Still Working on the Hangover PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:25:06 AM ----- BODY: Still Working on the Hangover The best print description I've read of the current fighting in Afghanistan. I've really got to hook the TV in here back up. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Never Miss His Work Victor PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:33:54 AM ----- BODY: Never Miss His Work Victor Davis Hanson buries the lead in a column you should read immediately and twice. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: They Sure Don't Look Alike PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:43:23 AM ----- BODY: They Sure Don't Look Alike If I were a firearm, I'd be an H&K G11 assault rifile.

Which Firearm are you?
brought to you byStan Ryker

Funny, I always thought myself more the sniper. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Let's Hope They Don't Agree PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:53:50 AM ----- BODY: Let's Hope They Don't Agree Twice Deb is one of my dearest friends -- and a committed Marxist. Or perhaps a Trotskyite or Maoist. I'm colorblind to those variations. But last August, in a cocktail-fueled argument, we came to an agreement for maybe the first time ever. New York or LA was going to get nuked. 60/40 New York, but put your money on either. Three weeks later, passenger jets were crashing into the World Trade Center. The one time we agreed, and we both had to be right. OK, so the 9/11 attacks weren't nuclear -- but just wait. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why VodkaPundit Now Leaves Maureen-Bashing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:56:52 AM ----- BODY: Why VodkaPundit Now Leaves Maureen-Bashing to Juan Juan Gato does it again. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Dogs and Cats Living Together, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 12:04:16 PM ----- BODY: Dogs and Cats Living Together, But With Some Tension I have to find out about the Blogger Drinking Game second hand? There is something very, very wrong with the universe. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Castration of the Republican PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 12:18:51 PM ----- BODY: The Castration of the Republican Party, by Robert Bartley So that's not really his point, but it might as well be. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The First One Was Too PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 12:37:18 PM ----- BODY: The First One Was Too Obvious Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's 30-Foot Intestinal Parasite") reports that automakers -- starting with BMW -- will be installing Windows in some new car models. Punchline #1: We'll have a whole new way to crash cars. Punchline #2: In a related move, Amoco announces it will soon carry memory upgrades at its service stations. Punchline #3: BMW originally picked Apple OS, but customers demanded cars that go faster than 50. Punchline #4: State assemblies consider new bills banning driving while blogging. Did I miss any? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Read It Now I missed PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 01:06:12 PM ----- BODY: Read It Now I missed the latest from Kathy Kinsley yesterday, having spent the entire afternoon in the kitchen with my lovely bride-to-be, and the entire evening in gourmand heaven. My loss. Kat's elegant post on Americans is worthy of its subject. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Another Gem Will Warren gets PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 01:30:13 PM ----- BODY: Another Gem Will Warren gets the last word on Heathers and AlphaGirls. NOTE: Fresh analysis is held hostage to the piece on Israel I promised you this morning -- and can't finish because all the options are just too damn: A) Depressing; B) Unpalatable; or, C) Both. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Just That Kind of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 04:25:37 PM ----- BODY: It's Just That Kind of War I give up on writing my supposed analysis on Israel and the Palestinians. No matter how many angles I look at it from, the only long-term solutions seem to boil down to: 1) Israel gets nuked and the survivors escape to the US and Europe. The Palestinians inherit a wasteland. 2) Israel clears the West Bank of Arabs, and Jordan suddenly has a massive refugee problem. Total war then erupts in the Middle East, leading back to the first option. Keep in mind, I'm saying these are the only permanent solutions I can think of. I'm sure everyone can keep muddling through with just the usual amount of carnage. Is there another route? Realistically? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Yet Another Happy Post UPI's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 05:13:32 PM ----- BODY: Yet Another Happy Post UPI's Martin Walker says that Arafat is losing the battles but winning the war. He may be right. Here's more of my cultural bias -- or maybe just simple pessimism -- about the Arab world. This country is, by and large, looking forward to the day when this War on Terror is over and we can stop killing strangers and come home. There are a few Nuke'em All idiots on the right, and some Let Them Nuke Us idiots on the left, but the vast middle is all in favor of doing what needs to be done and then going back to normal life. Meanwhile, Arafat's poll numbers are up to 70% approval among Palestinians (see the Walker column for details). That means Arabs are defining victory not by securing peace or a state of their own -- they could have had both two years ago -- but by simply killing Jews. There is something so sick at the heart of that culture, that they'd rather slaughter and be slaughtered than to forge something real and good and just. That sickness is something we must fight as hard as terrorism itself. I just don't know how. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 05:43:51 PM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part III Excellent satellite imagery of the aircraft carrier China purchased from Russia a while back. Reminds me of the Iraqi army before Gulf War I. They had all that top-notch equipment from Soviet arms manufacturers, but no doctrine or training to make it all work. The Chinese may spoil for a fight with us someday -- if their regime lasts long enough. And if they do, that will be the end of their regime. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Even in 2002, "War Liberal" PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 08:02:21 PM ----- BODY: Even in 2002, "War Liberal" Is Not an Oxymoron A much-appreciated (at least by me), and probably pretty accurate criticism of Republican and Libertarian thoughts on who should be manning the government. I just wish he'd mentioned Tom Ridge by name as an example of the importance of getting smarter people into public service. War Liberal Mac Thomason is always putting out great stuff, and I never remember to blogroll him. I'll take care of that shortly. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Raised Glass Salutes Overdue props PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 09:59:47 PM ----- BODY: Raised Glass Salutes Overdue props and blogrolls to Asparagirl and the infamous War Liberal. In one simple template edit, we now have a lefty war monger and a queer Republican. You meet the best people on the web. I love this place. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Meantime, We're Already Working on PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/04/2002 11:50:51 PM ----- BODY: Meantime, We're Already Working on Tomorrow's Blogs As is often the case with matters military, Bill Gertz has the best reporting I've read so far of Operation Anaconda. Read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Coming Soon to a Lounge PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:02:00 AM ----- BODY: Coming Soon to a Lounge Near You Ralph Peters, one of the smartest writers on military affairs, and one of the most talented writers of fiction, explains today on OpinionJournal why US casualties can be a good thing. Combat deaths indicate that we are serious about destroying the enemy, that we are willing to do whatever it takes. I would be far more distrustful of a campaign without casualties Just like that, without naming names, Peters sets up and knocks down Bill Clinton’s anti-terrorism policy. On the current battle raging near Gardez: There likely will be more American casualties. Perhaps many more. We may see some American elements ambushed and even wiped out. That's war, folks. You suck it up and keep on marching. War is, ultimately, a contest of wills. And our war with terrorism is a knife-fight to the bone. When Americans die, the sole correct response is to hit back even harder. In a knife fight, Peters doesn’t need to add, both parties are going to bleed. The winner is the last one standing. Our combat losses, though we feel each one, are understandable and, to a painful extent, inevitable. We have done an astonishing and commendable job of limiting our casualties. But soldiers die in war. They must be remembered – but we ought not to let them die in vain. Wouldn't it be lovely, though, if just a few of those men and women preening for the cameras in their "combat correspondent" get-ups would spend just a little less time in front of mirrors and just a bit more learning about war? No comment needed. Peters has a new non-fiction book coming out this summer. But damnit, man – we need another novel! It’s still one of my favorite daydreams to be in on a booze & bullshit session with Peters and Robert Kaplan ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Gut-Wrenching Trivia Also from PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:04:42 AM ----- BODY: More Gut-Wrenching Trivia Also from OpinionJournal, something that has received no play anywhere I’ve read: the 21 Jews slaughtered over the weekend in Israel were mostly of an anti-Zionist sect who pay no taxes, are paid no government benefits, and do not serve in the military. “They are by definition unarmed.” So are stewardesses. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bibi Back in Business? Link PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:06:45 AM ----- BODY: Bibi Back in Business? Link via Drudge: The Times reports that Arial Sharon’s government may be on the ropes. My first guess is that if Sharon can’t hold power, he’ll be replaced by Bibi Netanyahu. And Bibi won’t be trying to crack the whip to keep an absurdly wide coalition government together. Instead, he’ll be cracking the whip on the Occupied Territories, with plenty of support from a right-wing Likud government. And the Palestinians will have only themselves to blame. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Perpetual-Motion Machine Still in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:09:20 AM ----- BODY: Perpetual-Motion Machine Still in Prototype The Washington Post reports another claimed success at cold fusion. I'll believe it when I have my eight dollar electric bill and my hovercar. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Shocking Discovery: Manuel Noriega Wasn’t PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:12:49 AM ----- BODY: Shocking Discovery: Manuel Noriega Wasn’t Very Nice, Either In order to understand terrorist-sponsoring nations, Nicky Kristof suggests we look in the mirror, to our support for Angolan strongman Jonas Savimbi: Jonas Savimbi, the Angolan rebel who was killed 10 days ago, murdered and tortured countless civilians over the years; the Angolan civil war that he sustained may be responsible for more than 500,000 deaths since 1975. But he was our warlord, not the other side's, and so we were as blind to his brutality as the Saudis and Pakistanis are to the sins of their terrorists. Fuck you, too, Nick. Far from being blind to Savimbi’s crimes, this country had a very vocal debate. You won’t find that kind of soul-searching on important policy matters in any Middle East nation except for Israel and Turkey, and in Jordan on alternate Thursdays. Furthermore, when the Cold War ended, so did our support for Savimbi. It was one thing to support “our” thug while the Soviets (remember them?) rented out the Cuban Army to fight in Angola. It was quite another to support him after Castro went home – and we didn’t. Nick then goes on to list the “lessons” we should learn from the mistakes we didn’t make. I won’t trouble you with them. The whole thing was just a set up to attack Reagan-era policies. There’s a new war, with new enemies – and new lessons to be learned. Kristof, like most of the New York Times staff, has yet to accept those facts. What next? A debate over the Contras? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Somebody Owes Me a Drink PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:17:59 AM ----- BODY: Somebody Owes Me a Drink Mort Kondracke on Gulf War II scenarios, talks to retired Army general Thomas McInerney: McInerney said it should take only 20,000 or 30,000 U.S. ground troops to follow up the bombing campaign and that the United States could expect assistance from anti-Saddam elements in Iraq, including Kurds, Shiites and dissident elements in the military. Compare that with VodkaPundit on February 13: VodkaPundit Bet: We take Iraq with one heavy division or two armored cav regiments, one light division, and assorted special forces -- all supported by Air Force and Navy pilots. You read it here first. Two divisions worth of troops, compared to the nine we sent over in 1990-91. And that has less to do with the weaknesses in Saddam's armed forces than in the new force multipliers of ours. For those unfamiliar with Army organization, two divisions (depending on type) add up to about 20,000 to 30,000 soldiers. We’ll see how it plays out in the real world. But in the meantime… …advantage: VodkaPundit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Keeping Perspective An interesting PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 09:28:03 AM ----- BODY: Just Keeping Perspective An interesting The Times story on the soul-searching going on in the Israeli Defense Force after recent mistakes caused the deaths of several innocent Palestinians. I know I don't have to draw the comparison, but I'm going to give it nice phrasing and symmetry so you can use it at your next dinner party. When the Israeli army screws up, innocent civilians die -- and they try to avoid doing that again. When Palestinian terrorists succeed, innocent civilians die -- and they try to up the body count for next time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Whip Them When They're PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 09:58:00 AM ----- BODY: Why Whip Them When They're Always Self-Flagellating? Some days ya just gotta do a little fishbarrelling. C'mon -- it'll be fun. I found some big fish in that barrel called The Guardian. Today's target is George Monbiot, who writes: Those of us who opposed the bombing of Afghanistan warned that the war between nations would not stop there. Not to quibble, but your warnings were about how other nations were going to pile on us because of our quagmire in Afghanistan. So you're right -- except that we'll be carrying on our victorious war efforts to nations of our choosing and on our timetable. Better luck next campaign, George! Now, as Tony Blair prepares the British people for an attack on Iraq, the conflict seems to be proliferating faster than most of us predicted. But there is another danger, which we have tended to neglect: that of escalating hostilities within the nations waging this war. Huh? The war at home is going to escalate from the attacks of 9/11 that killed 3,000 civilians? Then we'd better widen that war to other terrorists states much faster than you're pretending to have predicted. The racial profiling which has become the unacknowledged focus of America's new security policy is in danger of provoking the very clash of cultures its authors appear to perceive. Ha ha. You're joking, right? Nations who would otherwise not dare to attack us, are going to blow us up because of a tiny domestic policy aimed at increasing security? What next -- is Nigeria going to lob missiles at Orange County to instill stronger support for Affirmative Action? Yesterday's Guardian told the story of Adeel Akhtar, a British Asian man who flew to the United States for an acting audition. When his plane arrived at JFK airport in New York, he and his female friend were handcuffed. He was taken to a room and questioned for several hours. The officials asked him whether he had friends in the Middle East, or knew anyone who approved of the attacks on September 11. His story will be familiar to hundreds of people of Asian or Middle Eastern origin. You're saying someone had to put up with a little inconvenience and a little embarrassment? Pardon me, but we're still breathing incinerated human body remains here in Manhattan, so I hope Mr. Akhtar understands. And several hundred people, you say, have suffered the indignity of answering questions? We lost several thousand to barbarian attacks. Sorry if civilization is now only 99% as civil as it used to be. I have just obtained a copy of a letter sent last week by a 50-year-old British Asian woman (who doesn't want to be named) to the US immigration service. At the end of January, she flew to JFK to visit her sister, who is suffering from cancer. At the airport, immigration officials found that on a previous visit she had overstayed her visa. She explained that she had been helping her sister, who was very ill, and had applied for an extension. When the officers told her she would have to return to Britain, she accepted their decision but asked to speak to the British consul. A bureaucratic paperwork snafu? Say it isn't so! Good thing that never happens in life-or-death situations, like in your National Health Service. They refused her request, but told her she could ring the Pakistani consulate if she wished. She explained that she was British, not Pakistani, as her passport showed. The guards then started to interrogate her. How many languages did she speak? How long had she lived in Britain? They smashed the locks on her suitcases and took her fingerprints. Then she was handcuffed and chained and marched through the departure lounge. "I felt like the guards were parading me in front of the passengers like their prize catch. Why was I put in handcuffs? I am a 50-year-old housewife from the suburbs of London. What threat did I pose to the safety of the other passengers?" One more time: Everyone is just going to have to be a little patient with us while we get our bearings. Ms. Anonymous was not detained for more than 24 hours, she was not sent to a camp, she was not executed. When these things start happening, then it's time to worry. Last week, a correspondent for the Times found 30 men and a woman camped in a squalid hotel in Mogadishu, in Somalia. They were all African-Americans of Somali origin, who had arrived in the US as babies or children. Most were professionals with secure jobs and stable lives. In January, just after the release of Black Hawk Down (the film about the failed US military mission in Somalia), they were rounded up. They were beaten, threatened with injections and refused phone calls and access to lawyers. Then, a fortnight ago, with no charges made or reasons given, they were summarily deported to Somalia. Now, without passports, papers or money, in an alien and frightening country, they are wondering whether they will ever see their homes again. That sounds pretty awful. Wait... I remember Mogadishu from TV, and the whole place is squalid. No sources, no quotes, no names for the rest -- not even a link to The Times story. So we'll just skip this part. This is the morass into which Tony Blair is stepping. "These are not people like us," he said of the Iraqi leadership on Sunday. "They are not people who abide by the normal rules of human behaviour." Some would argue that this quality establishes their kinship with British ministers. But to persuade us that we should go to war with Iraq, Blair must first make its leaders appear as remote from ourselves as possible. "Morass!" Finally, the Quagmire Worry. I thought George would get through the whole column without it. We'll just skip to the end now, since the rest is just Racists Under Every Bed twaddle. I get it, I get it -- I'm a bad man who kills black people, and probably even suspicious of people with nice tans. That George Hamilton guy better watch himself. The attack on Iraq, when it comes, could in a sense be the beginning of a third world war. It may, as hints dropped by the US defence secretary, Donald Rumsfeld, suggest, turn out to be the first phase of a war involving many nations. It may also become a war against the third world, and its diaspora in the nations of the first. We can only hope. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit Says Buy -- Another PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 10:12:06 AM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit Says Buy -- Another Round Reuters (Motto: "One Man's News Agency Is Another Man's Oversized Cold Sore") reports Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neil says the US economy is out of recession, never was in recession, we never seen that recession before, and we were only holding the recession for a friend. I hate to say this, but O'Neil is right -- we never did have two consecutive quarters of decline. The only contraction was in the third quarter -- the same as when our financial center was destroyed. We had the wind knocked out of us, but kept on running. Or at least walking briskly. O'Neil predicts 3-3.5% growth for 2002, but I'd bet a little higher. 3.5-4.0%. Seriously. If you can find a cheap index fund... ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But What About Mary? Also PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 10:30:46 AM ----- BODY: But What About Mary? Also from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's International News Agency Is Another Man's Compound Fracture"), comes word that President Bush will announce protectionist steel tarrffs, perhaps as high as 30%. I explained yesterday why these tariffs aren't just bad economics, they also rob Peter to buy Paul's vote ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Can Do That? From PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 10:33:52 AM ----- BODY: We Can Do That? From ITAR/TASS via Drudge: The earthquake that shook Central and South Asia last Sunday might have been triggered by super-modern weapons intensively used by the U.S. aviation in the seismically dangerous areas of Afghanistan, a source in a Moscow geo-physical research center has told Itar-Tass on condition of anonymity. Cool. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Dogs And Cats Living Together PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 10:38:12 AM ----- BODY: Dogs And Cats Living Together Iain Murray does the unthinkable -- he beats VodkaPundit in Buchanan Bashing. Well done, Iain. I'll try to be faster on the draw next time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: GatoWatch Day Two Still no PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 10:46:11 AM ----- BODY: GatoWatch Day Two Still no crap, still nothing moronic. It's like looking for sex in Salon's sex column. Today, Jaun just gives us good stuff like this. He accomplishes in one short paragraph what I was working on four 30 minutes last night, and eventually abandoned. Gato economically takes down alleged economist Paul Krugman. Juan, you're going to have to change that slogan. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Finally, a Worthy Cause Little PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 10:52:40 AM ----- BODY: Finally, a Worthy Cause Little Green Footballs has an excellent idea of what to do about that abortion for a comic strip The New York Times published yesterday -- complaint bomb their asses. Or you can link directly to their comment page by clicking here. Charles, if we succeed in getting Rall pulled, can we go after Moore next? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Return of the Son of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 10:56:53 AM ----- BODY: Return of the Son of the Revenge of Uthant Uthant is back. You shouldn't click, but you know you want to. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Haven't Seen Anyone Else Doing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 11:25:16 AM ----- BODY: Haven't Seen Anyone Else Doing This President Bush apparently believes that political capital is for spending, and that spending will generate more political capital. He may be right. Read this bit by Peter Ferrara in today's NRO. Bush is jumping up and down on the Third Rail of American politics, and chanting "neener." Compare that to Bill Clinton, who shoved all his capital under the mattress, in case anyone ever found out about the intern under the desk. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Cats Isn't Really "Now and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 11:33:07 AM ----- BODY: Cats Isn't Really "Now and Forever," It Just Feels That Way He has to dig back more than a century, but Dave Shifflett finds "An Acceptable Frenchie." A Frenchman so good, not even Andrew Lloyd Webber could make him look bad. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Free Enterprise Produces the Deadlier PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 11:50:12 AM ----- BODY: Free Enterprise Produces the Deadlier Product But that's a good thing. The not-at-all vaunted Eurofighter "Typhoon" just got a Sidewinder up the tailpipe, courtesy of the Netherlands. Reports Strategy Page: The Dutch decision to participate in the development of the F-35 Joint Strike Fighter is not only tantamount to a decision to buy that aircraft, but a major and perhaps fatal blow to export efforts by Eurofighter for its Typhoon and the French for their Rafale. The Europeans had hoped to kick the US out of the European fighter market, recapturing the four nations (Netherlands, Norway, Denmark, Belgium) that bought the American F-16. The Dutch decision (and Norway's decision to reopen the competition that had been narrowed to the two European designs) indicates that this attempt will largely fail. The F-35 is a generation beyond Typhoon or Rafale and will cost less. Here's where I have to mention that the F-35 is the product of privately-owned Lockheed-Martin, and the Typhoon is built by a conglomeration of EU-supported semi-public entities. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hitch, We Hardly Knew Ye PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 11:57:39 AM ----- BODY: Hitch, We Hardly Knew Ye Christopher Hitchens is back in today's Mirror, and listing heavily to port. It was nice while it lasted. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Where's Ken Layne When You PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:22:36 PM ----- BODY: Where's Ken Layne When You Need Him? I swear to Whomever I'm going to try to give a damn about the gubernatorial primary today in California. The Republicans should be able to run the deranged infant clone of Pol Pot as their candidate to beat the amazingly inept and aptly named Gray Davis. Or is he Davis Gray? I never can remember -- he's that unimpressive. Plus there was that little energy fiasco last year, when Davis (or Gray) was wily enough to be negotiated out of billions of California tax dollars. Any Republican candidate should be able to answer all media questions with, "I'm too drunk to remember," and still be polling ahead of Gray (or Davis). But California is so willfully, stupidly Democratic, that Davis (or Gray) has a war chest so big that the spare change can buy enough ads to smother Mini Pol Pot with smears of a truly Begala scale. And when I say California is stupidly Democratic, I mean it in the sense that any time anyone supports a single party without question, that party will screw them, hard, anally, without lube. In politics, that's called "gratitude." Ask any black parent who wants school vouchers. And so the voters today in California will select their party's candidates -- Davis Gray or Gray Davis for the Democrats, and Mini Pol Pot or Tiny Hitler or someone from the Republican party. I can't actually remember the Republican's names. The ones I gave are the best I can do, based on some half-forgotten TV news stories. I think one of them used to kill Hispanic people in LA or something. It was all on CNN. So I really am going to try to care about the primary. I'm just not going to try very hard. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Previous Post Is Funny PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:34:31 PM ----- BODY: The Previous Post Is Funny Chris Mathews with some hard numbers and hard facts about Israel and Palestine. The question is, how do you “get tough” with an enemy who asks only that you let him die? Exactly. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: WarVodka? I have to quote PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 12:45:00 PM ----- BODY: WarVodka? I have to quote this whole graf from Mac Thomason, and not just because he mentioned me today: I think that you can usually tell how President Bush and his people feel about a government program by the people appointed to run it. At the cabinet level, that shows in the very high quality of the foreign policy people, and the very uneven quality in domestic policy. Ridge came in late, of course, but he's a great example. President Clinton, on the other hand, had some top-notch people in economics but a lot of iffy appointments elsewhere. More echoes of 41 in 43? The Bush family seems to have serious trouble with taking domestic policy very seriously. The 1991-92 recession was both short and mild by historical standards, but Poppy let it destroy him. That was OK -- we could afford a Clinton in the '90s. But we can't afford a Gore in '04. The stakes are much higher today. Let's hope someone up top gets with the program. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Maybe That's How He Got PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 02:16:07 PM ----- BODY: Maybe That's How He Got His Vampire Fetish Hawk Girl Emily Jones goes for Paul Kennedy's throat -- and comes away a bloody mess. Fortunately, the blood all belongs to Kennedy. Fun! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Not Bad for a Dumb PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 02:29:24 PM ----- BODY: Not Bad for a Dumb Blonde and Her Gay Best Friend Link via InstaPundit: In a bit of cultural warfare even Pat Buchanan would call overkill, Iran will introduce Islam-friendly, homegrown alternatives to Barbie and Ken dolls. "The dolls are most welcome. Dara and Sara are strategic products to preserve our national identity. And of course, it is an answer to Barbie and Ken, which have dominated Iran's toy market," toy seller Mehdi Hedayat said. In America, we think of Barbie dolls as something we have to remember to buy little Becky for Christmas -- when we think of Barbie at all. In Iran, they're considered a threat to their national identity. And people try to argue ours is not a superior culture? Another toy seller, Masoumeh Rahimi, said Barbie was "foreign to Iran's culture" because some of the popular Western dolls wear revealing clothing. She said young girls who play with Barbie, a doll she sees as wanton, could grow into women who reject Iranian values. Iranian values, such as theocratic dictatorship? There you have it, kids -- halter tops help end oppression. UPDATE: After coming up with that punchline, all I can think is that there's got to be a story ending with "G-Strings for Jesus." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's a Dirty Business I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 03:16:38 PM ----- BODY: It's a Dirty Business I should probably be slapped around a bit for taking all damn day to find the latest Podhoretz column in the New York Post. I'll give you the last three paragraphs. That's disingenuous. Daschle did what he did not because he's a leader of the Senate but because he is a true partisan leader. He believes it's his responsibility to test the depth and strength of the public support for George W. Bush, who is not only the president but the head of the rival party. Not only that, but Daschle needs to test the waters for his own presidential run in 2004. Daschle may believe that the more skeptical news coverage of the war in the past month has penetrated into the American consciousness and has therefore given him and other Democrats an opportunity to chip away at a president who has been all but unassailable for six months. Sounds like Tom is paying too much attention to the beltway pundits (beldits? I mean, if we're "bloggers") and not enough to his South Dakota constituents. But does the Democratic Party really want to play this role when it comes to terrorism? If its leading politicians become naysayers and skeptics, that will open up the party to legitimate charges that its anti-war and pacifist legacy dating back to the 1960s is just too strong to be overcome. And now we're to the meat of the matter. Daschle is playing a very dangerous game, prodding at a (so far) successful and popular war leader. Which is why he's starting out so gingerly. The upside? Daschle could sink this presidency and help his own chances in '04. The downside? He could do more harm to himself and his party than LBJ and Carter combined. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Soapbox Time Earlier today, at PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 03:28:39 PM ----- BODY: Soapbox Time Earlier today, at the behest of Little Green Footballs, I sent the following email to Arthur Sulzberger, publisher of The New York Times: I assume you've been made aware by now of the Ted Rall "comic strip" that recently ran in your paper. Revolting. -S. Stephen Green Mr. Sulzberger (or at least his office) replied, "Agreed; it's off." Sarge wrote back to me and suggested we bloggers were wrong to get that Rall strip pulled, and part of me agrees -- as offensive as he is, I've never before written to complain. But that strip... damnit, those widows and widowers and children deserve their year of mourning, and I'll be damned if I'll just sit here while some creep with bad penmenship and a worse soul denies them that. I've had my say. I'll shut up now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'm Not Holding My Breath PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 03:43:15 PM ----- BODY: I'm Not Holding My Breath or Anything Happy Fun Pundit's Steve steps into Will Warren's shoes -- with hysterical results. Just so long as I'm not imagining Yoko doing the singing, that it. Which reminds me. Is neither Steve nor Dan nor Will ever going to do anything with "At Long Last Ebola"? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'd Pay to Have Napster PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 03:52:25 PM ----- BODY: I'd Pay to Have Napster Back Like it Was A setback for file swapping. Hopefully, it's only temporary. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Antiglobos Aren't Celebrating Only PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 04:33:33 PM ----- BODY: The Antiglobos Aren't Celebrating Only Because They Don't Understand It It's official, and it comes as no surprise that President Bush announced steel tariffs of 8-30%. A callow move designed to buy votes in the Rust Belt, Bush is also hoping to wrangle Trade Promotion Authority back out of Congress in exchange for his craven cave-in to special interests. First off, Congress is not going to give Bush TPA. Second of all, we've just shown our trading partners that we'll gladly screw them in exchange for a handful of votes -- that surely can't be good come the next round of trade talks. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Don't Care If He PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 04:48:10 PM ----- BODY: I Don't Care If He Eats Babies Hank Kissinger can usually be trusted to get the big picture right. He's the latest (if late) to chime in with support for Bush's Axis of Evil. Christmas bombing, Ramadan bombing -- it's all good. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Cold Fusion for Dummies Dale PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 05:09:30 PM ----- BODY: Cold Fusion for Dummies Dale Amon, an actual scientist and engineer, reports in from Belfast with some cautious optimism on cold fusion. Read it. Meanwhile, my decadent self is just hoping for enough real-world application to do something about getting some cheaper air conditioning. You should see my utility bill in August. Well, that and keeping the vokda chilled. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'm Waiting for the Angry PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 05:21:42 PM ----- BODY: I'm Waiting for the Angry Emails David is right about The Monkees. I've been thinking of finally putting together one of those silly web personality tests. Mine would be a decade-by-decade pop music examination. For example, which do you choose: The '50s: Buddy Holly or Jerry Lee Lewis? (Correct answer is Jerry Lee.) The '60s: The Beatles or The Rolling Stones? (Correct answer is The Rolling Stones.) The '70s: Air Supply or anyone else? (Anyone else.) And don't tell me there is no such thing as a correct answer on a personality test. Look around your office tomorrow and you'll see my point. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Glass Is Just Empty PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 05:37:41 PM ----- BODY: The Glass Is Just Empty History. Grim, bloody history. The new Buckley is up on NRO, but you might want to wait until after dinner. The killed and the killers are undergoing the indefinability that attaches to the long ago. Seventeen Athenians were killed on Wednesday and eleven Spartans. Nine Algerians were trapped, 8 French ambushed. Twelve South Vietnamese, 20 Vietcong. XYZ Raids Kill 17 ABCs. In Tel Aviv, 3 Die in a Shooting. We do know that, however shrouded by the mists, in history we nevertheless did have ultimate winners and ultimate losers. Ask any Carthaginian. Can we assume that in today's situation in the Mideast a historical outcome is foreseeable? And I think WF is an optimist. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Our Own Back Yard PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 05:57:19 PM ----- BODY: It's Our Own Back Yard I've been trying to get more serious discussion going about Latin America the last couple weeks, but to no avail. Maybe this column by Michael Barone will help. I've just looked at the obvious problems in Argentina and Colombia. But Barone takes on Mexico and Venezuela, too. The upshot? Democratic capitalism (or neoliberism as Baron likes to call it) isn't dead in Latin America -- but somebody needs to dial 911. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Wonder He's Wiped Out PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 06:15:28 PM ----- BODY: No Wonder He's Wiped Out I knew it had been a long day, so I did a little cut'n'paste into Word to get some stats. So far today, 34 posts and damn near 5,000 words. Not including this post or these words. And we're not even close to done. Forget all my damn blogging -- can you folks keep up with it? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Satire Alert. Slower Readers Move PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/05/2002 06:24:33 PM ----- BODY: Satire Alert. Slower Readers Move Along to the Next Post It has come to VodkaPundit's attention that he's been left out of a blogosphere debate regarding the ages at which one may legally drive, vote, join the Army, and drink. Now look here, if we make all those legal limits the same age -- say, 18 -- then we'll have our young people suddenly driving drunk from the ballot box to go start wars. This is the same reason we have laws against having sex with dangerous animals. Repeal those, and suddenly half the male population is going sans trou at the zoo. And if you think I'm being alarmist and silly, then you're probably onto something. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Makes Good If it’s PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:01:10 AM ----- BODY: Tom Makes Good If it’s Wednesday, it must be Thomas Friedman. And he is on this morning. When Hindus kill Muslims it's not a story, because there are a billion Hindus and they aren't part of the Muslim narrative. When Saddam murders his own people it's not a story, because it's in the Arab-Muslim family. But when a small band of Israeli Jews kills Muslims it sparks rage — a rage that must come from Muslims having to confront the gap between their self-perception as Muslims and the reality of the Muslim world. What Friedman says here could go part of the way towards explaining what this site has been calling the “sickness” at the heart of Arab culture. The Muslim world needs to take an honest look at this rage. Look what it has done to Palestinian society — where the flower of Palestinian youth now celebrate suicide against Jews as a source of dignity. That is so bad. Yes, there is an Israeli occupation, and that occupation has been hugely distorting of Palestinian life. But the fact is this: If Palestinians had said, "We are going to oppose the Israeli occupation, with nonviolent resistance, as if we had no other options, and we are going to build a Palestinian society, schools and economy, as if we had no occupation" — they would have had a quality state a long time ago. Instead they have let the occupation define their whole movement and become Yasir Arafat's excuse for not building jobs and democracy. And why not? Jews did much the same for centuries in their European ghettos, building their own society apart from the culture at large – and without having any legal rights or titles or lands. Surely, the Occupation cannot be so bad as that. If, that is, the Palestinians were willing to make it so. Some of this hatred will remain no matter what Israel does. But to think that Israel's exiting the occupied territories — and abandoning its insane settlement land grab there — wouldn't reduce this problem is absurd. Agreed. Israel will probably maintain the Jordan River valley and the Golan Heights to stay a viable nation – but they must leave the Territories. Israel cannot do it alone. But it has to do all it can to get this show off the air. It would take away an important card from the worst Muslim anti- Semites and it would help strengthen those Muslims, and there are many of them, who know that the suicidal rage of their fanatics is dragging down their whole civilization. Perhaps if the Palestinians are willing to settle down, if Israel is willing to pull back – and if the US is willing to make a defense commitment… then, perhaps, we might have some peace. It's bold, and much smarter than the hair-brained 1967 Redux idea the Friedman put forth last week. And I'm pretty sure he knows that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Condescension as a Weapon Today PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:04:50 AM ----- BODY: Condescension as a Weapon Today Maureen Dowd writes: “This whole mishegoss at ABC has led me to realize how much I'm being taken for granted.” You have no idea, sweetie. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:11:31 AM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part IV This link courtesy Next Right. The US Army and some really, very cool geeks at Oak Ridge are working on what sounds like Robert Heinlein’s Starship Troopers – but ready in ten years instead of a few centuries. The Objective Force Warrior suit has: Built-in chem and bio detection and protection Comm systems Situational awareness enhancement software Advanced infantry weapons Bullet-proofing Automatic bandaging and medication And lots of other goodies. I want one. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: En garde, Guardian! The posts PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:26:31 AM ----- BODY: En garde, Guardian! The posts below this go back to being short and amusing. Skip down if you don’t want to witness the savage beating of yet another silly Brit. Jonathon Freedland writes: Even the most stoic of Israelis are beginning to feel scared. The sight of a single family - father, mother and two daughters, one aged seven, the other a toddler - wiped out on a busy Jerusalem street has shocked those who thought they could be shocked no more. Egad! Sensible recognition of barbarity committed against Jews! Has The Guardian slipped its tether? At times like this, Israelis are not much in the mood for criticism. They feel desperate, the victims of a relentless war which makes targets of the most vulnerable: burger bars, buses and babies. Well, I can’t say I’d be much in the mood for criticism. Or even praise. Manning the ramparts seems a better option. But hell, they’re only Jewish babies, so let’s see how fast Freedland can whip out that criticism. So now is not an easy time for Israel to be told of the errors of its ways; the wounds are too raw. It helps that any critics can be dismissed so easily. If they are Palestinian or Arab, they are enemies of the state. If they are outsiders they are, at best, meddling know-nothings or, at worst, anti-semites implacably hostile both to Jews and their aspiration to have a place of their own. What errors are those, Jonathan? Failure to duck an explosion? Flagrant patronage of a burger joint? Or is their crime (we’ll whisper this one) being Jewish? If they are Jews from outside Israel, they are "armchair" snipers, sounding off from the comfortable sidelines. The less charitable version says any Jewish critic of Israel is, simply, a self-hating Jew. So how uncharitable would it be for a half-Jewish American blogger to question whether a pinko Brit columnist is also a hateful anti-Semite? But now there is a group who cannot be dismissed. They are not outsiders, do not sit in armchairs and hate no one, least of all themselves or their country. They are Israeli soldiers - battle-scarred combat veterans including a number of senior officers - engaged on perhaps their toughest ever mission. They are the "refuseniks", and their mission is peace. Their “mission” is not a mission at all. It’s the simple refusal to obey orders – a breach of military order punishable by jail. If they think they can have peace by not fighting, well, so did the French after Ardennes in 1940. It began with a newspaper ad, signed by 50 army reservists, declaring that when they were called up for their annual month of military service they would refuse to serve in the occupied territories. In the month that has passed, the ranks of Ometz Le-Sarev have swelled. There are now 314 signatories to that original declaration, with 200 more refuseniks allied to a similar group: 500 recruits to Israel's army of peace. Thanks to the central place of Israel's conscript army in the nation's life, they ooze credibility. Not only have they all worn the country's uniform, but they are the men in their 20s and 30s the Israeli army regards as its new generation of commanders. Once again, I have to explain the obvious to a highly-paid dunderhead. An “army of peace” is one that has knocked the enemy to the ground so hard as to end the fight. What Freedland describes is an army of surrender. That’s usually more an Iraqi thing than Israeli. Nor are they fringe lefties outside the Israeli consensus: more than 10 of the early refuseniks wear the crocheted skullcaps that serve as the badge of religious Zionism. All are avowed patriots, who insist they are happy to do their regular reserve duty but who refuse to act as occupiers on the West Bank or in Gaza. They adamantly believe in a Jewish state - they just want no part in ruling over another people. I’m no statistician, so correct me if I’m wrong here. But I’m pretty sure that ten out of 500 is, like, probably less than 50% OK, so one in fifty is a Zionist nutjub, and the rest are the fringe lefties. All that makes them impossible for their fellow Israelis to ignore. Opponents can throw none of the usual accusations. They know these men are not cowards: they have risked death before and their current stance exposes them to the prospect of at least a month in jail. Three are already behind bars. For the three behind bars, good. Why is the government wasting time with the other 490? Or in Freedland Math, the other 15%? Even their critics have to concede that these men are motivated by love of country. If they merely wanted to avoid the personal agony of a West Bank tour, they could fly abroad or develop a convenient health problem - both familiar techniques. Instead they are taking a stand in public and on principle. Lest anyone accuse them of providing succour to the country's enemies, they refuse to give on-the-record interviews to the foreign media: it is Israel they want to persuade. For the sake of Israel’s continued existence, I can only hope the rest of the IDF is more persuaded by Palestinian barbarity than the soft-headed stubbornness of a few recalcitrant soldiers. Then again, The Guardian is hardly known for its vocal support of Israel’s right to exist. And so Israel has to listen. The refuseniks tell their personal stories, explaining why they can no longer serve in an occupation force, and no one can wave aside their testimony as anti-Israel propaganda. Uri Dotan of the Nahal Infantry Brigade wonders if his personal breaking point was "the pregnant woman that my soldier did not let through the roadblock in Hebron because her stomach was not big enough. She later gave birth to a stillborn child in the crooked paths she followed in order to skirt the checkpoint on her way to hospital". Once again, a left-liberal Brit dares to talk about delayed medical care. Nice mouth, snaggletooth. You pull those wisdom teeth yourself? I’m going to skip ahead here, because the rest is a series of supposed atrocities committed by thr IDF. No time to refute, no desire to sink that deep into the muck. Let’s get to the end. So now I regard these men not as traitors, as their enemies allege, but as exponents of the very best in Jewish and Zionist tradition. Their protest is an act of great bravery, and they - every last one of them - are nothing less than heroes. Perhaps. But they are certainly nothing more than disobedient. UPDATE: Writing my morning posts late at night and with a cocktail, I sometimes forget the little things. Like linking to the original story. That's now fixed. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Another Satire Alert In a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:37:51 AM ----- BODY: Another Satire Alert In a primary race that campaign experts can only call "over," Gary Condit has lost his bid to keep his seat to upstart challenger Dennis Cardoza. Asked to explain his lopsided victory over an entrenched encumbant, Cardoza told reporters, "What did you expect? He killed that chick." Cardoza will face off against Republican sacrificial lamb Dick Montieth, who is not believed to have killed anyone, or even made them disappear. However, that is not thought to improve Montieth's chances, since in the 18th District, Democrats outnumber Rebublicans by a ratio of approximately everybody. In the gubernatorial race, Gray Davis (or Davis Gray) handily beat off all challengers, leading to a joke I won't touch with a ten foot poll. Not this early, anyway. Come November, Davis (or Gray) will be pounding surprise Republican nominee Bill Simon into very little tiny pieces. In a speech at Campaign Victory Headquarters, Simon told his delighted throng of supporter, Dave, that he "can't wait to get trounced" in the fall election. Gray (or Davis) also gave a victory speech, but, frankly, this reporter fell asleep sometime before the second syllable. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sometimes Drudge Scares Me I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 11:18:48 AM ----- BODY: Sometimes Drudge Scares Me I respect the hell out of Howard Stern. Now before you quit reading, keep reading. I don't like Howard Stern. I won't listen to his radio program or watch the televised version of it, but I read his autobiography -- and I really do respect the man. But Stern as a replacement for Letterman? Fuggidaboudit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Victory Is Ours, Sayeth the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 11:24:44 AM ----- BODY: Victory Is Ours, Sayeth the Pundit Pay attention bloggers and blogfans: "A federal court has ruled that nonprofessional news gatherers have the same rights as professionals." You know the Patricia Demarest case. Well, the AP reports you don't need some special permission to excercise your First Amendment rights as a journalist. Many pro journalists wanted Demarest shut down -- they rightly see us amateurs (especially the big ones like the Prof) as threats to their pivileged positions. And many lawmakers wanted the same, because needing some sort of license to practice journalism means some sort of control over journalists. Demarest won. The First Amendment won. We won. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sweet Blogger Revenge Protein Wisdom PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 11:33:23 AM ----- BODY: Sweet Blogger Revenge Protein Wisdom shoots, scores, and deserves some kind of medal. UPDATE: HAd to fix a small error there. Be kind while the coffee brews. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Ominous Parallels Has Rich Lowry PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 11:43:31 AM ----- BODY: Ominous Parallels Has Rich Lowry been reading the Prof? Or were they separated at birth? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Easy Prediction Time Conservatives at PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 11:55:03 AM ----- BODY: Easy Prediction Time Conservatives at NRO and elsewhere are wetting themselves at the prospect of a "true blue" Republican running against Davis Gray (or Grasy Davis) this fall. Kids, this ain't 1966, and Bill Simon is no Ronald Reagan. VodkaPundit gives Simon three chances in eleven to win this race -- and that's being generous. Check back at this space in November for either a hearty I-told-you-so or a big dish of crow. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Like Hitler's Peace Plan, But PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 11:59:12 AM ----- BODY: Like Hitler's Peace Plan, But Less Focus on Ukraine If It's Friday, it must be Krauthammer! Wait -- it's only Wednesday. Well, don't look a gift horse in the mouth. No portions doled out to you here. Just read the whole thing, and do it now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: GatoWatch Day 3 Still no PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:18:21 PM ----- BODY: GatoWatch Day 3 Still no moronic crap from Juan Gato. Just a lot of excellent blogging. Where's the crap, Juan? Where's the moron? The world wants to know! We were promised crap from a moron, and instead we get good stuff worth reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Preaching to the Choir Michael PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:22:57 PM ----- BODY: Preaching to the Choir Michael Kelley, reliably good, gets it so right you have to wonder how anyone ever thought anything else. The administration does not know exactly how, in the end, it is going to prevail. But it does seem to know what Daschle does not -- that in the end it must prevail, that it cannot settle for declaring victory and going home: Home is where they attacked us. Any questions? Then let’s get to work. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Strong Recommendation Asparagirl is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 12:36:24 PM ----- BODY: A Strong Recommendation Asparagirl is back, and with some scary, beautiful thoughts on New York City -- and the shape of the next attack on it and us. Read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogwars Today may well be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 01:03:30 PM ----- BODY: Blogwars Today may well be the day that David Janes out-pundits the VodkaPundit. The man is on a mission -- and I'm burned out from yesterday's Herculean efforts. Salud, David. I wish you well! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But I Still Can't Find PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 03:23:20 PM ----- BODY: But I Still Can't Find That One Matthew Sweet Song Good news, file-swappers -- Gnutella is the new place to be. And it's big. This Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Spastic Colon Attack") report states that as Morpheus comes under attack by the RIAA, more users are switching to Gnutella. A weekend average of almost 400,000 of them at any given time. And growing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Happy News Out of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 03:35:15 PM ----- BODY: More Happy News Out of the Middle East Strategic Forecasts is back with special reports for WorldNetDaily. In today's report, StratFor looks at Sharon's dwindling options -- and the threat to his government. VodkaPundit argued much the same yesterday. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Special Award for Use of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 03:49:57 PM ----- BODY: Special Award for Use of the Word "Crapulence" Have you read today's G-File yet? Then what are you waiting for -- click already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Actual Praise for MSNBC Forget PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 04:06:39 PM ----- BODY: Actual Praise for MSNBC Forget the cute, tidy little graphs -- but do read this MSNBC report on the fighting near Gardez. For reasons I can't explain, the printed word can make combat seem much more real and immediate than can video. Anyway, this is good reporting and worth your time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bad Business The FTC has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 04:32:47 PM ----- BODY: Bad Business The FTC has approved the proposed HP buyout of Compaq, and a major investing house has weighed in positively -- so the deal will probably go through. (I can't remember the name of the investment firm, and I can't find the link. I saw the story this afternoon on Cavuto on Fox.) A couple things. Some call this plan a "merger." Perhaps. But only in the same way the Daimler-Benz/Chrysler deal was a merger. They may all speak (accented) English, but the decisions are made in Stuttgart, not Auburn Hills. Let me assure you that Palo Alto will be boss in this "merger." Second, the combined companies still won't have a model to beat Dell in direct PC sales or much of anyone else in retail. Sony at least has a rep for A/V integration with their VIAO machines and Apple still appeals to Mac diehards -- but can you remember anyone saying, "I'm looking first at HP (or Compaq) computers"? All this merger will do is let a single company fall further, rather than two companies stumble around. UPDATE: It took damn near an hour to get this post up through Blogger. I'm so glad to be paying the extra expense for my own domain. Who here has anything good or bad to say about Moveable Type? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: For Your Consideration Pejman Yousefzadeh PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 05:34:15 PM ----- BODY: For Your Consideration Pejman Yousefzadeh led me to Revoke the Prize, a group gathering e-signatures to urge the Nobel Committee to take back Arafat's Prize for Peace. First off, I don't think that's ever been done. Secondly, I don't think it will happen. Third, I signed it anyway, and ask you to so as well. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Thank You It took 46 PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 05:42:12 PM ----- BODY: Thank You It took 46 days for VodkaPundit to reach 10,000 hits. We'll double that sometime tomorrow -- just ten days after the first milestone. I think that means I'm doing something right. Thanks for agreeing, and reading, and passing it on. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 06:11:14 PM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part V Back in '93-'94, I was working for Time-Life in San Francisco's Shaklee Terrace. Very cool office, with a helluva view. We faced west, and could see Marin and the Golden Gate to the right, the Avenues and a sliver of the Pacific dead ahead, and Potrero Hill and the Warehouse District to the left. Gorgeous scene, and I took advantage of it every day. From the 30th floor, you can't smell the bums. Anyway, one morning I saw a ship coming under the bridge and into the Bay. Some black, angular thing that looked like... I didn't know what the hell it looked like. Maybe a waterlogged F-117A with a screw in the back. I went home and checked the papers and TV, but came up with squat. My 486 Compaq had a 2,400 baud modem, but I had no Internet connection, and didn't get one for another year -- by which time I'd forgotten about it. So I never did find out what the hell that ship thing was. Until just now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 06:23:35 PM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part VI StrategyPage on JDAMs -- and why they're as revolutionary as the machine gun or the tank. And the best? For the time being, only our side has them. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Post Fails to Mention PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 07:54:02 PM ----- BODY: This Post Fails to Mention the Supreme Idiocy of Leon Kass Good news from New Scientist: Chinese scientists are claiming a great leap forward in human cloning - the creation of dozens of cloned embryos advanced enough to harvest embryonic stem cells. Let's see what else happened before commenting. Their intention is not to copy human beings, but create genetically matched cells to make tissues for transplant patients and for research. Any fool could have told you that. In fact, this fool told you that the very first week VodkaPundit was running. It takes a lot of brains, such those at National Review and in the Republican party to be against medical cloning research. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tevye Said It First Head PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 08:25:50 PM ----- BODY: Tevye Said It First Head and subhead from SatireWire: GOD NAMES NEXT "CHOSEN PEOPLE"; IT'S JEWS AGAIN "Oh Shit," Say Jews Read the whole thing. Priceless. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sick Bastard I just got PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 09:46:49 PM ----- BODY: Sick Bastard I just got Googled for "'Bill Simon' California Jew" What kind of anti-Semetic creep does that? Or is it oppo research down in Davis Gray's (or Gray Davis') bunker? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogwars Revisited Sadly, David Janes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/06/2002 11:41:43 PM ----- BODY: Blogwars Revisited Sadly, David Janes failed in his attempt today to out-blog yours truly. Unlike some certain pundits of the distilled variety, it sounds like David actually has a life on weekdays. Salud, David -- and better luck on the next try. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Carter Just Likes How Kim PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:03:25 AM ----- BODY: Carter Just Likes How Kim Jong Il Deals with Killer Wabbits Jimmy Carter doesn’t think North Korea is evil. In today’s OpinionJournal, a German physician tours the DPRK: I soon realized that North Korea's starvation is not the result of natural disasters or even lack of natural resources. Like the Holocaust in Europe, the horror in North Korea is man-made. Twenty-two million people suffer under a dictatorial regime that uses torture, surveillance and starvation as tools to control its own people. Only the regime's overthrow will end it. How bad is it, really? I was eventually expelled from North Korea because of my open criticism of the government. Since then, I have been on a global campaign to raise interest in what I can only describe as crimes against humanity and genocide in North Korea. This is a country where food is used as a weapon against any opposition, Christians are persecuted, women sexually abused and young children forced into labor. Still, the world either doesn't know, doesn't care or doesn't want to believe. Some of us do know. Some of us do care. Fortunately, some of those who do are in the current Administration. North Korea’s turn will probably come last, after Iraq and Iran – but its turn will come. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Jokes, Damned Jokes, and Statistics PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:10:28 AM ----- BODY: Jokes, Damned Jokes, and Statistics Also in OJ, is Kimberly Strassel’s stroll through the latest US Census Abstract. Stop yawning and keep reading! There’s some great stuff in there, like this gem: “the average American consumed more than 117 pounds of red meat, nearly 30 pounds of cheese and 31.9 gallons of beer.” Goddamn, I’m proud. The tofuweenies are on the defensive. But it’s not all good news. More than 48,964 people were injured badly enough by their toilets to need the emergency room. Do you hear that? Our toilets are out to get us. Time to add another culprit to the Axis of Evil. We are a nation where things do get better, no matter how much special-interest groups wail. In 1998, 39.6% of blacks reported they voted, coming closer to the 43.3% reported rate for whites. Birthrates for girls and women age 15 to 19 fell to an all-time low. And some 42% of U.S. households had Internet access in 2000, up 26% from just two years earlier. Good news, indeed. Although whatever portion of Internet users read this site, are probably reconsidering the whole being wired thing. Best of all, we are still a nation people are desperate to call home. In 1998, 660,477 immigrants came to make a life here from every corner of the world. Another reason we’ll win this war. Kim has a great punch line, but I’m going to make you visit her column to read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Kiwis Hire Bouncers for Each PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:14:21 AM ----- BODY: Kiwis Hire Bouncers for Each Island A fun little pick-me-up from the Thursday Guardian: When our Netjetter Ellie Levenson set off on her travels, we hoped she would provide stimulating copy which would be read by many people. We little imagined that she would manage to offend a nation. Yeah, right – we all know Guardian writers piss off entire populations everywhere they go. I’d just like to see one try to walk out of a cowboy bar here in Colorado Springs. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Can I Get One PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:25:43 AM ----- BODY: But Can I Get One Installed in the Sebring? Scott McCollum in the World Trib has some tasty lines this morning. You’ll have to pick them out yourself, because he likes to hide them in 300-word sentences. But I’ll give you the gist of it right here: US Military to deploy laser cannon in the War on Terror I see only two obstacles to this plan: 1) Getting Melissa agree to the expense when we haven't even fixed up the condo to get it sold. 2) It's probably too heavy to install on top of a convertable. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We're the Marine Corps and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:36:36 AM ----- BODY: We're the Marine Corps and We're Here to Help WorldNetDaily sees a danger to Saudi oil fields from al Qaeda and Iran. A special report filed by Geostrategy-Direct details the dangers to the vulnerable Saudi well, which provide much of the blood to Western economies. "The worst possible case is Saudi fundamentalist radicals torching the oil wells to undermine the Saudi government – a scenario made more likely by public resentment of the U.S. military presence," Ivan Eland, director of defense policy studies at the Washington-based Cato Institute, writes in a study for the institute. I immediately had the feeling that Cato would then recommend a stout display of weakness by removing US troops from Saudi soil. Eland said Washington should respond to any Saudi request to withdraw American troops from the kingdom. That was an easy guess, really. And why I'll never completely be a libertarian. What too many Libertarians don't or won't understand is that sometimes you don't have to look for trouble in order for trouble to find you. A muscular foreign policy is often wise, pragmatic, safe -- and moral. Libertarians love quoting Jefferson, but they forget the Barbary Pirates. But back to the point. Look, the last time anyone threatened Saudis oil fields, they invited us in to protect them. It's getting to the point now where I say we go back in -- with or without an invite. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: What's Wrong With Araby, Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:47:29 AM ----- BODY: What's Wrong With Araby, Part #1,000,006 Barry Rubin has an interesting column in Thursday's Jerusalem Post, looking at the new Palestinian strategy and how the rest of the Arab world is taking advantage of it -- against the Israelis and the US. Good reading. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: My Kind Of Town A PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 01:13:58 AM ----- BODY: My Kind Of Town A report on just how fun strangeness can be from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's International News Corporation Is Another Man's Sucking Chest Wound"). Nederland, Colorado -- about 100 miles from the VodkaCondo -- has proclaimed this Saturday "Frozen Dead Guy Day." Dead Norwegian Bredo Morstoel was shipped to Nederland by his slightly nutty grandson Trygve Bauge, where he was cryogenically frozen. I hear you asking yourself, "Tiny Nederland, Colorado has a cryogenics clinic?" Well, not exactly. But Trygve (pronounced "Bob") has a shed in his backyard, and, apparently, an ice maker in his fridge that just won't quit. So the town has planned a celebration in Morstoel's honor, including a coffin race, a pancake breakfast, and -- of course -- a frozen dead guy look-alike contest. Lord of the Rings star Christopher Lee is considered a shoe-in. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Raised Glass Salute I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 01:25:00 AM ----- BODY: A Raised Glass Salute I read Balloon Juice because John Cole writes sentences like this: "He has amassed an umblemished record of unadulterated idiocy." Not only does that sentence read well, but as a former voice guy, I can tell you it rolls effortlessly out of the throat and over the tongue. Also, John has a great find -- further public regurgitation from none other than Ted Rall. The first link is Rall's, this link goes to Balloon Juice's lovely savaging of America's Fisk. NOTE: May I suggest from now on that we refer to Herr Rall as "America's Fisk"? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Set Bloggers for Kill Steven PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 11:30:21 AM ----- BODY: Set Bloggers for Kill Steven Den Beste of USS Clueless wrote a wonderfully bitter post on NATO, European obstructionism, and gratitude. Read it, but be prepared to go on your own rant afterwards. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Mad Again George Will PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 11:37:51 AM ----- BODY: He's Mad Again George Will savages Bush's cave-in to steel interests in today's column and, unlike yours truly, has some numbers to back it all up. Here's why we'll always need the pros: Do not read his lips, read his actions, which will incite protectionist clamors from other industries (timber and textiles, for starters) and invite retaliation from penalized nations. Bush's measures probably will neither force nor facilitate the restructuring the industry needs. Economically indefensible, these measures will destroy perhaps 10 jobs in the steel-consuming sector of American manufacturing for every steel-making job they save. Some manufacturers will move out of the country to avoid the tariffs. Bush's measures are new taxes on American consumers -- approaching $1 billion annually just on purchasers of cars and trucks -- and are purely political measures. Think of them as an $8 billion contribution coerced from manufacturers and consumers of steel products, for the benefit of about six Republican congressional candidates in steel-producing districts, and for Bush's reelection campaign. One more economic case to be made against these idiotic tariffs. Who cares if Russian steelworkers are unfairly competitive because they make less than $200 a week? And who cares if Russian mills are heavily subsidized? All that means is, we get cheapers cars and stoves, and Russian taxpayers -- already poor -- get poorer still under stiff taxation. We win, they lose, life is sweet. Except Bush just threw away a big part of our competitive advantage, and angered our new Russian friends in the process. That takes a special kind of smarts. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Modest Indecent Proposal I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 11:45:49 AM ----- BODY: A Modest Indecent Proposal I know Dave deserves more money. I know Dave needs a better news lead-in. But Dave on ABC? The two go together like Jonathan Swift and Barney. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'll Drink to That. Twice PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 11:56:26 AM ----- BODY: I'll Drink to That. Twice Steve Chapman writes today about terrorism, fear, and the return to normalcy. Three key grafs: I had time last Sunday to do all sorts of things. I read the newspapers, finished painting a bedroom, went for a run, got some photos developed, talked to my parents on the phone, and drove various offspring of mine to places they needed to go. But in that entire 24-hour period, I didn't spend a single second thinking about terrorism. Writing about this stuff every day, I haven't had that moment yet. But I hope you readers have. It's not that I fear for myself or my family, but there is that constant, nagging concern that New York or LA is still in danger. But Monday marks the six-month anniversary of the attacks, and six months is a long time. A few weeks ago, when we all worked ourselves into a tizzy over the outcome of the pairs figure skating competition at the Salt Lake City Olympics, it became undeniable that life in America could indeed return to normal--and had. We had the luxury once more of worrying about things that would have seemed grotesquely inconsequential on Sept. 12. Six months. Wow. Chapman is onto something here. I think I need to pause and relax and enjoy my weekends more. We've learned in the last six months that life can return to normal. We should also have learned that the way to preserve normality is to never take it for granted. Amen. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why He's Not a Republican, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:02:14 PM ----- BODY: Why He's Not a Republican, Either Thanks to Hawk Girl for this find on BC Monkey. Hot pants and hot wings and cold beer -- my kind of lunch. But some buttinskis think you shouldn't get a side of flirt with your meal. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: GatoWatch Day Four Juan isn't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:15:43 PM ----- BODY: GatoWatch Day Four Juan isn't posting much today, due to sore shoulders and other unpleasantness. But what is there is on his site is still neither crap nor moronic. Mr. Gato is going to have to do something especially craptacular soon, or people are going to think this whole GatoWatch thing is just a flagrant attempt by VodkaPundit to send some well-deserved hits his way. Um... ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Like Assassinating President Frankenstein PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 12:42:49 PM ----- BODY: It's Like Assassinating President Frankenstein When the Veep Is Dracula Not only are Arafat's days numbered, but so are the PLO's. And not in a good way. The only thing Arafat has going for him is that he's slightly less bloodthirsty than most of the current alternatives. This from the Washington Times: Extremist Palestinian groups expected to participate in the attempt to depose Mr. Arafat are said to include Islamic Jihad, the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine (PFLP), Hamas and PFLP-General Command. Yes, things can get worse. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Good News! No, Really By PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 01:10:44 PM ----- BODY: Good News! No, Really By an overwhelming majority, the House has passed a measure both to extend unemployment benefits and cut business taxes. The Senate is expected to quickly follow suit and get the bill on the President's desk. I've never been so callous a libertarian that I don't believe in some sort of unemployment protection -- although I'd be happy as a B-cup in a Wonderbra if it were privatized. However, extending unemployment benefits during a recession is silly. Why? It removes an incentive to scurry for work, just when the economy needs all the extra efficiency it can find. Which leads those of you paying close attention to ask, "Then why do you like this bill?" Simple. It cuts business taxes -- a fine idea in rain or shine -- and extends unemployment payments too late to do much harm. The economy is back to buoyancy, layoffs are way down, and employment is about to rocket back upwards. Things like this are why the Founders blessed us with divided government; the crisis is usually over before Congress can do anything to make it worse. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Breaking News Is anyone else PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 01:45:38 PM ----- BODY: Breaking News Is anyone else watching Ted Rall on FoxNews? Comments in the Drinks section, please. UPDATE: For the record, there are some brilliantly funny left-liberal cartoonists. Pick up a copy of your local alt weekly, and look for Matt Groening's Life In Hell. Yes, that Groening -- creator of The Simpsons and Futurama. He's brutal when he takes on Republicans -- but, unlike Rall, Matt is funny, witty, and often has a genuinely tender sense of humanity. I can't find a link to his strip, but the book versions are marvelous collections. Especially Love Is Hell and School Is Hell. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Roll Out the Blogs Will PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 02:19:12 PM ----- BODY: Roll Out the Blogs Will someone please not give Jeff Goldstein a hug? We need all the friggin' hawks we can get. Especially when they can turn a phrase like Jeff. "Charles Johnson's been on this like a sneer on Ted Rall." Gorgeous man, simply gorgeous. UPDATE: I just realized I had no blogroll link to Protein Wisdom. A mistake now fixed. You'll find the PW gang under Hair o' the Dog. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Cheap Jokes Department From AP: PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 03:40:54 PM ----- BODY: Cheap Jokes Department From AP: UN talks with Iraq called positive. UN Sec'y General Koffi Annan: Are you sure you're not going to shape up until after the US has leveled Baghdad, hung Saddam up by his ankles, dismembered your nation, and given all the good bits to Jordan and Turkey? Iraqi Foreign Minister Naji Sabri: Yeah, positive. Rim shot. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Made In Taiwan Time to PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 03:54:06 PM ----- BODY: Made In Taiwan Time to do a little counter-reporting. From today's New York Times: As China convenes its Parliament this week, its leaders seem less agitated about the nettlesome issue of Taiwan than they have been for some time. Quite possibly because Bush has said he'll protect Taiwan, and the last five months have shown what his word means. In his opening speech on Tuesday, Prime Minister Zhu Rongji repeated an offer to resume negotiations between China and Taiwan, which Beijing regards as a rogue province. He did not, however, raise the prospect of using military force against the island. Look, China has the military power to destroy Taiwan, but they do not have the ability to secure air superiority over the island, naval supremacy in the Straits, force a multi-divisional landing on Taiwanese beaches, secure an airhead with paratroops, then keep all those soldiers fed, armed, clothed, and medically treated. So I'm glad to see that Rongji has decided to, at least momentarily, dabble in reality. It was the second major address by a Chinese official recently that did not contain this customary warning. To people here who parse every utterance from Beijing for deeper meaning, these are signs that China is less worried that Taiwan will declare independence. Taiwan won't declare independence, because they fear your missiles. But VodkaPundit argues that the US should go ahead and recognize Taiwan, because Beijing certainly fears ours. Also, there's that little tiny details of Taipei being an freely-elected government with rule of law and free markets and free speech and all those nice things we're supposed to be in the business of promoting. The rest of the story is actually quite interesting, listing all the little ways Taiwan is exerting independence without actually declaring it. Gone are many of the "Republic of China" slogans, in favor, simply, of "Taiwan." Hell, the island is no longer even ruled by the Chinese Nationalist Party who gave it the ROC moniker back in '49. VodkaPundit says: Check it out. UPDATE: Vodka-swilling half-Jewish warmonger and swarthy East Indian libertarian -- separated at birth? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Is the Best of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 04:19:36 PM ----- BODY: This Is the Best of the Web Take ten minutes and read the latest from David Warren. Don't ask, just do it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Can't We All Just Get PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 04:34:14 PM ----- BODY: Can't We All Just Get Alert? Link courtesy Juan Gato. CNN reports on the new threat warning system in development by Homeland Security Übermensch Tom Ridge. The system we've all become accustomed to these last six months has five stages, in order of increasing risk: 5) Situation Normal. Planes could fly into buildings at any moment and without warning. 4) Slightly Elevated Risk. We know this guy who talked to someone who heard about some bad people. 3) Elevated Risk: Those guys from 4? They had a map. 2) Serious Risk. Also, one of them had an accent. 1) Go On And Panic. We have no clue what just happened, but stuff is blowing up. As you can see, the current system is in need of some work. Under the new rules being looked at by Ridge: 1) Threat warnings will only be issued when they might: A) Make John Ashcroft look good, or B) Keep Tom Ridge from looking bad. The second part was originally written to read "Make Tom Ridge look good," until his staff remembered that is just not going to happen. Also, the new system promises color codes and pretty pictures. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Prescient Is the Word You're PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 05:37:48 PM ----- BODY: Prescient Is the Word You're Looking For Glenn Reynlolds -- holder of mystical powers? Since before the fighting began in October, the Prof has been calling for all al Qaeda supporters to journey into Afghanistan. Then we'd turn it into a terrorist Roach Motel. Now read this from the Washington Post: U.S. officials and Afghan commanders said al-Qaida sympathizers – including some from Pakistan – had crossed into the mountains to join the fight. Afghans said enemy forces may now number 1,000. Bring'em all on. We've still got plenty of bombs. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Dinner Is Nicer With PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 05:46:14 PM ----- BODY: And Dinner Is Nicer With Food From Matt Drudge, this Reuters (Motto: "One Man's News Providers Is Another Man's Explosive Diarrhea") report claims that last fall's anthrax attack would have been much worse without antibiotics. Pardon me if I'm obtuse, but isn't that a bit like saying broken legs are not quite so good without a cast? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Get Too Excited Just PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 05:53:38 PM ----- BODY: Don't Get Too Excited Just Yet Congressman Rick Boucher wants to protect your right to copy your own CDs. From the Wired story: The feisty Democratic congressman from Virginia says he plans to introduce legislation banning, or at least regulating, compact discs outfitted with anti-copying technology. I know the Prof thinks Republicans should be capitalizing on this issue -- but it is really more suited to the "protect the little guy" antics of the Democrats. Frankly, I don't care who jumps down the throat of the evil RIAA, just so long as it happens. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Fine Day for Libertine PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 05:59:24 PM ----- BODY: A Fine Day for Libertine Lawbenders Also of interest to file swappers is this ZDNet report on DivX 5.0. You'll have to pay, it will (at least uncracked) have digital rights management protection -- but it could make swapping movies possible over the Internet. But that still doesn't get me Star Wars on DVD, damnit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Know You Are But PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/07/2002 06:18:08 PM ----- BODY: I Know You Are But What Am I? Visit the Sarge for the real skinny on those Air Force officers claiming the Army was reckless in sending in ground troops so soon in Operation Anaconda. Interservice rivalry, kids. That never stops, not even in war. Anyway, read Sarge's post and become enlightened. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We’ll Get Back To Being PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 12:03:29 AM ----- BODY: We’ll Get Back To Being Silly and Useless, Right After This Israel doesn’t want to re-occupy the West Bank or Gaza Strip. They’ve seen that show already, and didn’t like it enough to catch it again in re-runs. But thanks to the new Barbarian Intifada, the IDF has to move into some Palestinian town to kill a few baddies, move back out, then has to do it all over when the next batch of baddies shows up. It’s like “Lather. Rinse. Repeat,” only you never get to leave the shower. It reminds me of a story from Vietnam. Keep reading, I’m not some left-liberal nutjob talking quagmire here. The strategy in Vietnam was to have no strategy. We would keep clearing the same spot of worthless land of the enemy – then keep letting them take it back. That gets old. It’s bad for the soldiers lives, it’s bad for morale, and it’s a surefire way to lose a war. The story I remembered ended with, “But Sarge, we took that hill two days ago.” Israel can win this, I think. I hope. But they can’t win it using the same failed techniques we used in Vietnam. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Fleischer Line Sounds Like PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 12:08:19 AM ----- BODY: The Fleischer Line Sounds Like a Children’s Book As someone who didn’t come down on Tom Daschle very hard for his ill-timed remarks on the war last week (I saved my real venom for traitor-baiting Trent Lott), I find today’s Dan Henninger column refreshing, well-reasoned, and worth your time. Henninger compares the press reaction to Daschle to the press reaction to Ari Fleischer’s Little Oops this week. It’s a point I haven’t seen elsewhere, and that needs to be made. Give it a read. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Long Yarn, But You’ll PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 12:13:01 AM ----- BODY: A Long Yarn, But You’ll Love the Punchline Nicholas Kristof is headlined today with “Chicks With Guns.” I was so overcome with excitement, my keyboard appeared to momentarily levitate. Then – big, predictable mistake – I read the actual column. A generation ago, women here at Mount Holyoke College defied convention by burning bras and moving in with boyfriends. These days, some women here are shocking the campus by embracing something even more dangerous than men — guns. I’d like to know two things. One, what is Nicky trying to imply with “even more dangerous than men.” What, we can’t control ourselves and have to rape college girls? We encourage women to buy guns, and they’ll hurt their poor, pretty little selves with them? What’s he saying here? He’s starting to sound like ol’ Frumpy Dowdy herself. The other thing is Kristof’s immediate assumption that guns are inherently dangerous. Left to their own devices, they pretty much just sit there, and eventually gather rust. So while we don't know whether more Americans will be killed by anthrax, we can be quite confident that plenty of us will be killed by these additional handguns. And, as John Lott demonstrated a couple years ago, the vast majority of those killed will be bad men, by good women, in self-defense. Glad to know Nick is on the side of rapists, muggers, abusive husbands, etc. The F.B.I. has figures showing that in the six months since the terror attacks it has conducted 455,000 more background checks for gun purchases than in the same period a year earlier. The agency says it has also conducted 130,000 more checks than a year earlier for applications to carry concealed weapons. He says that like it’s a bad thing. Frankly, the more legally armed people there are, the safer I feel about the illegally armed barbarians. Maybe if we start letting decent people carry pistols on planes, the next Flight 93 can land on the fucking tarmac. The impulse to seek protection through firearms is evident here on the lovely Mount Holyoke campus. Christie Claywood has a typical student's dorm room — piles of books, heaps of clothes, a laptop computer on the floor, bottles of liquor that she very hurriedly explains were for a birthday party — but there's also a stack of paper targets with holes from .22, .38 and even machine gun bullets. Ah, now that’s gun control! Christie put her lead on the paper. Still – firearms and booze. It’s a good thing I’m already taken. Now quit being so condescending to the nice young lady, Kristof. About 50 women at Mount Holyoke have signed up to join the college's chapter of Second Amendment Sisters. It is bizarre to sit on the campus of a liberal all-women's college in Massachusetts talking with students about their yearning for, say, a Smith & Wesson 9-millimeter semiautomatic — but maybe that's just because I'm not used to feminists with guns. "Shouldn't self-defense and being able to take care of yourself be part of empowerment?" Ms. Claywood asked sweetly. Talk about condescension. Do you think Kristof would ever have written that last bit about a feminist with whom he agreed? I’m a bit paleo about opening doors and paying for dinner – but chicks who can shoot seems like a pretty strong brand of feminism to me. And I like it. It turns out that, in addition to Women and Guns magazine, there is a growing number of such women's groups. These include Mother's Arms and Armed Females of America, whose Web site declares: "Those who push for `gun control' are of the same mindset as Palestinian suicide-bombers and the Taliban who kidnap women for rape and sex-slave trade. Both don't like the possibility of armed citizens, in these cases, especially armed WOMEN." You go, girl! I grew up on a farm where rifles were essential for hunting and for keeping coyotes away from our sheep. I got a .22 rifle at age 12, and my grade school in Yamhill, Ore., emptied of boys each year on the opening day of deer season. So, as a country hick, I'm comfortable with guns. But there's abundant evidence that having more handguns also means more gun thefts, more armed robbery, more suicide and more murder. Yeah, but now yer all citified and sophistimacated and know better than to mess with them hick pistols. Besides, everyone o’ us down on the farm reckon that more knives leads to more eatin’ steak. Why, we could all be vegetarians like that dead kid actor, if’n we’d only outlaw sharp things. Japan, where I used to live, allows only about 50 people (all leading target shooters) to own handguns, and while criminals do smuggle them in, there were only 28 gun deaths (murders and suicides combined) in 1999, the most recent year for which figures are available. By contrast, the United States had 26,800 gun deaths in 2000. So go back to Japan. Different culture, different rules. And you still haven’t explained how we get from here to there without provoking a civil war. Moron. England has higher rates of assault, vehicle theft and burglary than the United States. But tight controls on handguns mean that England's murder rate is only one-sixth of America's. In the years since the UK abolished handguns and the US has started liberalizing concealed-weapons permits, London has out-stripped New York City’s handgun murder rate. But let’s not mention that, because it would ruin Nicky’s “argument.” Defenders of guns can intelligently argue that, as with fast cars, the pleasures of gun ownership are worth the increased mortality. That is an opinion with which one can agree or disagree. Likewise, it is true that the overwhelming majority of guns will be used responsibly (from the point of view of everyone except hungry coyotes). But it is pointless to try to deny the link between more handguns and increased murder and suicide. I never did argue such a thing. What I argue is that in a culture with a historic comfort with firearms ownership, the best thing you can do is teach range safety – and let those who are legal, carry. Our desire to defend ourselves from terrorism by buying firearms will mean, almost certainly, that thousands more Americans will die in the years ahead from gunfire. It's not terrorism, but it should be terrifying. So why doesn’t Nick suggest something practical, like giving money to the NRA for its vaunted gun safety program. Or barring that, why doesn’t Nick just shut the hell up – there’d be one less person I want to shoot. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Flag-Waving Fun War news from PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 12:31:44 AM ----- BODY: Flag-Waving Fun War news from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Web News Source Is Another Man's Mysterious Crotch Fungus"). Let's take two quick grafs from the story: Operation Anaconda, the biggest U.S.-led battle of the five-month Afghan war, involves about 1,500 U.S. and Afghan ground troops against more than 1,000 rebel forces holed up in caves and bunkers in 10,000-feet snow-covered mountains. At least eight U.S. troops and seven Afghan soldiers have been killed in the operation and about 40 U.S. and 30 Afghan troops have been wounded. If this were a live-fire training excercise, involving that many soldiers of vastly different training and cultures, operating in an extreme climate and with very close air support, I'd expect about that many casualties. And yet that's how well we can do when a fantatical, suicidal enemy is shooting back. I hope once they're done mourning their losses, our armed forces give themselves a big pat on the back. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: An Open Letter to George PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 12:46:22 AM ----- BODY: An Open Letter to George W. Bush Dear Mr. President, Your recent decision to wildly increase steel tariffs leaves me unable to argue against the latest screed from Paul Krugman in today's New York Times. Now that hurts. Yours, etc. PS When Mickey Kantor agrees with you, you know you screwed up. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Word If He'll Return PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 10:48:25 AM ----- BODY: No Word If He'll Return to Movies He was a McCain guy, but I could never hold that against him. So it is with sadness that I relay the news that Senator Fred Thompson won't seek re-election this fall. In the finest tradition of citizen-legislators, Thompson served his six years from Tennessee, and is now going back home to be with his family. With at least three other Republicans retiring this year, the party has an uphill battle recovering their majority. But then, I'm a big fan of divided government. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bear With Him a Moment PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 10:53:53 AM ----- BODY: Bear With Him a Moment Early yesterday afternoon, I wrote, "The economy is back to buoyancy, layoffs are way down, and employment is about to rocket back upwards." Now this from the New York Times: In the latest sign that the American economy is recovering from the recession, the nation's unemployment rate unexpectedly fell for the second consecutive month to its lowest level since October as employers added jobs, the government said today. The unemployment rate slipped to 5.5 percent in February from 5.6 percent in January, the Labor Department reported. Wall Street economists had predicted that the unemployment rate would rise to 5.8 percent. Advantage: VodkaPundit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just One More Cup of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 10:57:09 AM ----- BODY: Just One More Cup of Coffee Steven Den Beste on the press and the idiocy of a cease fire in Operation Anaconda. (Don't worry, brother and sister hawks -- they're not actually considering one.) ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also Be Sure to Compliment PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 11:01:06 AM ----- BODY: Also Be Sure to Compliment Her New 'Do HawkGirl has a lovely new look, but still that same razor edge. If you like your templates a little girly and your text a little biting, you know what to do. PS Where's Glenn? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Doesn't Promise to Not PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 11:18:19 AM ----- BODY: He Doesn't Promise to Not Kick Back Doug Turnbull on the importance of unpredictable punditry. You kids will let me know if I ever get predictable, right? There are times I need a swift kick in the ass -- just ask Melissa. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Return of the Thing That PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 11:34:30 AM ----- BODY: Return of the Thing That Would Not Die The economy is rebounding nicely and the Afghanistan Phase of the War on Terror is seeing great success. But President Bush is still managing to have an impressively awful week. Did I say awful? That's not even close. In the wake of a hypocritical, double-dealing, vote-buying, job-killing steel tariff hike, Bush now says he will sign the bloated, wasteful, pork barrel, red ink, completely unnecessary "stimulus package" just passed by Congress. Look, the economy is creating jobs, the recession ended four or five months ago, interest rates are still low -- why the hell do we need an extra 40 billion bucks in Federal spending on bike trails and slabs of concrete with "Robert C. Byrd" etched on them? Craven vote-buying, kids. I might just vote Democratic for Congress this fall. I mean, if they actually bother to run in my district. They tend to get tarred and feathered here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: GatoWatch, Day Five Today, Juan PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 11:36:51 AM ----- BODY: GatoWatch, Day Five Today, Juan links to this: "A cageful of drunken monkeys is like a cocktail party." I frankly don't know if that counts as crap from a moron, but I do know you need to click over there and check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Acting Senile Again It's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 12:28:12 PM ----- BODY: He's Acting Senile Again It's a slow news day, so let's play Catch Up Comedy for some of our new readers. If you'll think back a few months, you might remember Reuters announcing they wouldn't use the word "terrorist" anymore to describe terrorists. Instead, they would follow the left-liberal tradition of reserving that word for people who don't want to double school lunch spending. Reuters Head Dummy Stevn Jukes said "One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter." Fine, I thought. Two can play at that game. So every time this blog mentions Reuters, we have a little fun. The joke always follows the same pattern. "In today's news, wire service Reuters (Motto: 'One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Inflamed Hemorrhoidal Tissue')..." just to give a new example. Anyway, you get the idea. Here are Reuter's fake mottos to date: One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Shin Splints ...Is Another Man's Mysterious Crotch Fungus ...Is Another Man's Explosive Diarrhea ...Is Another Man's Sucking Chest Wound ...Is Another Man's Spastic Colon Attack ...Is Another Man's Compound Fracture ...Is Another Man's Oversized Cold Sore ...Is Another Man's 30-Foot Intestinal Parasite ...Is Another Man's Wet Hacking Cough ...Is Another Man's Kidney Punch ...Is Another Man's Oozing Sore ...Is Another Man's Painful Urination ...Is Another Man's Rectal Exam ...Is Another Man's Bladder Control Problem ...Is Another Man’s Unfunny Laughingstock Remember, satire can't win the War on Terror. But it can give us something to laugh about when we need a break from the worry. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: New Math, Old Math Richard PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 01:30:55 PM ----- BODY: New Math, Old Math Richard Bennett skewers modern math teaching better than anyone since Tom Lehrer first sang "New Math." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Raised-Glass Salute Why I read PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/08/2002 02:45:08 PM ----- BODY: Raised-Glass Salute Why I read Mac Thomason's War Liberal. Commenting on Fred Thompson leaving the Senate: This is Al Gore's old seat, but he immediately said he won't try to get it back. Which is probably a good call, since he couldn't even beat a Texan in the state in 2000. I'm a Democrat, but I'm a fan of Thompson's. He's one of the good ones, and the Senate will miss him. I said similar words about Sam Nunn a few years back, Mac. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Now Go Outside and Play PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/09/2002 09:42:11 AM ----- BODY: Now Go Outside and Play -- It's Saturday Right now I'm having a lovely weekend, complete with hangover. But shortly I'll have a... response to the Prof's suggestion of Pope VodkaPundit I. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Catholics Without a Sense of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/10/2002 10:44:12 AM ----- BODY: Catholics Without a Sense of Humor -- Move Along Friday, Revered Internet News Maven InstaPundit made a wisecrack about Pope VodkaPundit I. Now, even though my lovely fiancée's maid of honor and her husband (just back from Saudi -- details Monday) are in town, I've had a few minutes to give this idea some thought. About the job. It's time. The College of Cardinals historically reserves the Papal Gig for Catholic Italian guys, with the occasional Frenchman or Pole thrown in for color. Obviously, some affirmative action is called for. The Church needs a half-Jewish, atheist Pope. With great hair. The name. Obviously, I can't keep the working name VodkaPundit. So I've settled on Pope Incorrigible I. Surely it is more honest the Pope Innocent the Anythingth. Changes will have to be made to drag the Church kicking and screaming into the 20th Century, much less the 21st, so I'll have to convene Vatican III. The changes I'll propose include: Priests will still be forbidden to marry. However, they will be encouraged to fool around. With girls. Grown-up girls. Mass will be held in the local language, or, where desired, Pig Latin. Goodbye to cheap red wine, hello Colt 45. Makes you feel holy, every time. The Popemobile will be rigged to pop wheelies. All those Vatican fountains? Jacuzzis, baby! Instead of kissing tarmac on arrival in foreign nations, will kiss prettiest local Hooters girl(s). Those hats are so gone. Nuns will be more like the ones in Italian porn. "Hail Mary" replaced with "Whoooooa Nellie!" Communion wafers even better with just a touch of brie. Let's get some serious Southern Baptists in the choir. Those folks can sing. Goodbye collection plate, hello roulette wheel. Holy See renamed "Holy Shee-it." Just to hear French diplomats say it. Confessional Truth or Dare. Church members will now be allowed to giggle every time the word "seminary" is used. Big masses in St. Peter's Square: Less talk, more rock. Swiss Guards in fairy costumes replaced by 300-pound bouncer named Tiny. Catholic girls school skirts? Totally unchanged. Those aren't Rosary beads. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Catchy Headline This Time PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:01:23 AM ----- BODY: No Catchy Headline This Time Today is the six-month anniversary of the start of the Current Mess. The New War. The War on Terror. I wanted to write some moving words, but the newspaper pros do it better – and they’ll be over this like spilled Merlot on new carpet. I wanted to do something stirring, but the TV replays of the attacks, of the aftermath, of our heroes here and overseas, will stir you more than I can. So all I can really do is to remind you of what you already know. This is war. It’s going to be a long one, and it’s going to get frustrating – thanks both to our enemies and our friends. Despite the neat end-scenarios other bloggers posted yesterday, the ending might be as muddled as the beginning was distinct. Don’t despair, don’t ask for an easy ending, and never, ever forget why we must continue. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All Things Green Considered The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:06:47 AM ----- BODY: All Things Green Considered The spring issue of Parameters -- the US Army War College Quarterly -- is up and available for your reading pleasure. It can be a bit dry, so I’ll report back any gems I find and spare you the effort. Sadly, nothing new from Ralph Peters. Does this mean he’s working on a novel? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Now That’s What I Call PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:08:35 AM ----- BODY: Now That’s What I Call Progress Madeleine Bunting writes in Monday’s Guardian: Six months after September 11, it is no longer Islamist terror we are afraid of but the US nuclear hitlist. Good. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Quick Thought And probably worth PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:11:45 AM ----- BODY: Quick Thought And probably worth the time put into it. Israel is lifting the siege on Yasser Arafat, pulling tanks back from around his Ramallah headquarters. With the Arab League summit approaching later this month, could Sharon be letting Arafat leave the West Bank – only to lock the door behind him? Exile for Arafat could very well start a PLO/Palestinian power struggle. A nice way to keep attention (and bombs) away from Israel. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Hangover Helper Austin Bay on PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:16:06 AM ----- BODY: Hangover Helper Austin Bay on “this nuanced and intricate war” that is “still in the early, formative phases.” A fine Monday morning pick-me-up from one of our finest writers on military affairs. Excuse me, I mean finest paid writers. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Link Whore, Part Somecomicallybignumber Has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:20:08 AM ----- BODY: Link Whore, Part Somecomicallybignumber Has Suman Palit read this Tunku Varadarajan piece on Hindu Nationalism? I’ll head over his way around lunchtime. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Release Your Inner Geek Go PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:22:59 AM ----- BODY: Release Your Inner Geek Go on and download it. There’s really nothing to be ashamed of -- unless you cackle loudly at your monitor like some sotted pundits I could name. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We’re From Microsoft, and We’re PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:28:28 AM ----- BODY: We’re From Microsoft, and We’re Here to Help Fascinating reading, also from today’s NYT op-ed. Jonathan Zittrain argues that the safer we make our computers from viruses, from snooping, from rogue applications, the less useful they will become. Zittrain scores further points for giving at least some appearance for supporting file sharing. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Moral Equivalence of Stupidity PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:37:53 AM ----- BODY: The Moral Equivalence of Stupidity Bill Safire today (perhaps inadvertently) agrees with Michael Kinsley’s formula that for politicians, a gaffe is defined as “accidentally telling the truth.” You could probably have come up with the Ari Fleischer Blaming the Mideast on Clinton example on your own, but Safire sure writes it better. Bill Clinton, eager to wash away memory of his transgressions, pressed Barak for even more concessions to appease Yasir Arafat. That Saudi-sponsored Palestinian, seeing Israel's panicked leader on the run, was thus emboldened to make greater demands. Envisioning total victory, he launched the terror war on civilians. That's what happened. No soft, nonpartisan politesse can erase that well-recorded, hard history. Though Clinton's motive was Nobel, his incessant intercession was a gamble that failed spectacularly — paving the path to Arafat's war. You need to read the whole thing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Next Saudi Offer: Everyone Gets PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 11:21:55 AM ----- BODY: Next Saudi Offer: Everyone Gets Candy! A disingenuous Saudi peace offer? Say it ain't so! World Net Daily reports: Saudi Arabia is backing down from its proposal to offer Israel normalized relations in favor of a much-publicized land-for-peace deal. According to the report, a demand by Syria prompted the new position by Saudi Arabia, and it has been agreed to by the Arab council. This whole dance was staged better than a kabuki performance. And the kicker is, there wasn't a Big Mac's chance at a WTO protest that the Israelis would accept the deal, nor that we would pressure them to. I'll never understand diplomacy. A unworkable plan is offered but not meant. Despite its insincerity and impossibility, the other side must make the appearance of not only giving serious consideration, but actual enthusiasm. Once the proper noises are made, the other side starts to have a fake argument within its ranks, so as to sabotage the plan that was never meant to come to fruition in the first place. Did any good at all come out of this charade? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And I'm Less Hawkish Than PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 11:27:36 AM ----- BODY: And I'm Less Hawkish Than Some Speaking at a 9/11 ceremony at the White House, President Bush today described a "second phase" in the war on terror. Sadly, he was referring to the bloody mopping up fighting going on in Afghanistan, and not dropping a daisy cutter directly down the front of Saddam Hussein's jockey shorts. "Every terrorist must be made to live as an international fugitive, with no place to settle or organize, no place to hide, no governments to hide behind, and not even a safe place to sleep." No, Mr. President. Every terrorist must be made to die. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Insider View of Saudi Melissa's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 11:53:35 AM ----- BODY: Insider View of Saudi Melissa's maid of honor was in town this weekend -- along with her husband, who flies F-16s for the Air Force. We'll call him M. M just got back from four months at Prince Sultan air base in Saudi Arabia, and says that things aren't like they used to be there. Even officers saw few, if any, real live Saudis. M said if you went up to the control tower you could talk to one. But otherwise, segregation was complete, without even many Pakistani guest workers in view. The tension, he said, was palpable. They knew they weren't wanted there -- and asked among themselves what they were still doing protecting this "shitty little country." US Air Force frustration seems to be high with the Kingdom, and while they must know this, they aren't doing anything to relieve the tension. And keep in mind, these are Air Force fighter jocks -- some of the most respected, and feared, military officers in the world. If there's a small group of elite people you might want to make happy, these are the guys. Instead, they are ignored, shunned, and made to feel unwelcome. The End Days of Saudi, kids. This is what they look like. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Saudi Arabia: The Next Palestine? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:12:53 PM ----- BODY: Saudi Arabia: The Next Palestine? This is what happens when I have insomnia -- I spend half the night attacking the same subject from every possible angle. If you're sick of reading about Saudi, move on. But I think this one is worth sticking around for. Obviously, Saudi Arabia can't go on like this. They take our money and our blood, and teach hatred of American and the West in return. Their young men make up some of al Qaeda's most vicious and intelligent terrorists, and their oil money keeps the barbarians in arms. We cannot continue to protect and fund our own destructors. But what will Saudi Arabia look like when it's back to just "Arabia," and I don't mean the lines on the map; the problem is the people. So let's say we take Glenn Reynold's excellent advice, and turn over the holy places of Mecca and Medina to the Hashemites of Jordan -- a nice cure for Winston's Hiccup. The Persian Gulf coast oil well orchards go to Kuwait and Qatar and the UAE, etc. The Empty Quarter will still be, well, empty. But what about the people? Not the 7,000 princes. We can arrange some sort of war crimes tribunal en masse before we shoot the worst of them and exile the rest to Switzerland. I mean the 15 million (and growing quickly) Bedouin tribesmen. These guys are your holy warriors, your fanatics, your Puritans-with-a-car-bomb. They won't rest kindly under "foreign" rule -- not even the Turks completely subjugated them. They certainly won't change their evil brand of Wahabbi Islam. And dividing up the country certainly won't make them go away. So will they become the Next Palestinians? Occupied, resentful, suicidal. What do we do about the Bedouins? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Finally Something Light Thomas Sowell PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 12:21:41 PM ----- BODY: Finally Something Light Thomas Sowell quips about aging. Here's my favorite: Someone asked a man in his 70s at what age he started to lose interest in women. "I don't know," he said. "But when it happens, I will tell you." Amen, brother. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We'll Be Back After These PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 02:00:30 PM ----- BODY: We'll Be Back After These Important Messages Prof is right -- we did manage to de-Nazify Germany after WWII. But the Bedouins might prove more difficult. I'll explain why after a quick run for food and to the dry cleaners. Also, it's a gorgeous damn day, and I have got to take the top down and break some speed laws on Academy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Next Palestine, Part II PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 03:42:18 PM ----- BODY: The Next Palestine, Part II In response to my earlier post, the Überblogger wrote: the Arabian peninsula has basically declared war on us already. And, you know, there were a lot more Germans in Germany, and Japanese in Japan, at the end of World War II. Glenn is right -- but only mostly. The Wahhabi Bedouin will be tougher nuts to crack than Germans or Japanese. Before the war, Germany was a full-fledged working member of a very exclusive club called Western Civilization. An industrial powerhouse, an educated people, an ancient culture home to some of the West's best science, technology, music and art. But there was something wrong at the heart of German culture, something Hitler was able to exploit and harness. What was that black spot? Simple anti-Semitism? Was there some bit of civilization missing because the Germanic heartland was never Romanized? Is it just cool to race to Moscow in a tank? I don't know and I don't care. Whatever was wrong, was fixed. Beyond a few cranks, there was no denying the Holocaust. There was no denying that Germany's decisions had brought utter ruin and destruction to their country. When the decent nations of the world combine against you, when they bomb your every factory, railway siding, bridge, and city, then you know you've done something wrong. We rubbed the German's noses in their own shit -- and they've been good puppies ever since. Same goes for Japan, only more so. Japan is an ancient culture with achievements to match the West, but due to their insular nature, they were late to see the benefits of Western ways. Instead of already being members of the club, Japan wanted desperately inside it. They tried to negotiate their way into Western Civ before World War One. They tried to fight and claw their way in from 1933-1945. They found the first way was useless and the second way led to a ruin even more complete than the Germans. By the middle of 1945, there was not a single major Japanese city which had not had its center burned out. And worse was on the way, had they not capitulated. The shock of defeat and occupation so thoroughly (perhaps too thoroughly) demilitarized Japan that they even now have blistering debates over whether give pistols to their UN peacekeeping soldiers. Now compare Germany and Japan in 1939 (the official start of WWII), to Arabia today. Arabia is a land almost singular in its lack of contribution to the modern world. Take away their mineral wealth, and all you have left is tribes "slaughtering one another over trivia," according to Ralph Peters. Arabia doesn't want to be let into Modernity, it wants to smash it. In a just war, such as WWII, you smash enemies like that. You smash them until they are unable to make a fist, much less throw a punch. But in this age, those kinds of spankings are no longer tolerated. Can you imagine us today leveling Riyadh the way we did Dresden? Or Hiroshima? We have greater cause to, but it won't happen. Not only that, but Arabia has less to lose. They have no industrial heart, no center of high arts, no rule of law to take away. They have two sacred cities, a lot of unemployed fanatics, and most of the world's oil. How do you spank someone who has no ass? Yes, we probably can wipe Wahhabism from Arabia. But let us be not blithe about what it will take. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: One of These Things Is PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 03:52:40 PM ----- BODY: One of These Things Is Not Like the Other Condi Rice, Camille Paglia, and Eleanor Clift. If you picked "Eleanor Clift," you win a cookie. But all three ladies do have one thing in common -- they're all part of a fun, lively essay by the lovely Asparagirl. For the record, VodkaPundit would love to see a Rice/Paglia ticket for either major party in 2008. And I swear I won't make too many jokes about who gets to be on the top of the ticket. The sad part is, I know it isn't me. Sigh. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Excuses, Excuses I'm not a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 04:13:18 PM ----- BODY: Excuses, Excuses I'm not a computer guy. I'm the artsy, useless type -- which is probably why I screwed up my HTML approximately two evers ago, and lost the link to PejmanPundit. In case you don't know, Pejman is a frequent contributor here in the Drinks section, and a fearsome blogger in his own right. Smart, funny, well-informed, he is also the inspiration behind my goal to call people by their first names. I can barely spell my five-letter Anglo monosyllable, Mr. Yousefzadeh. (Did I get it right this time?) UPDATE: Speaking of lost HTML code, no matter how many times I take that silly Which Criminal Are You test, I always come up as Kissinger or Manson. But, damnit, I want minions. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Maybe a Gap-Toothed God With PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 04:58:27 PM ----- BODY: Maybe a Gap-Toothed God With Bad Hair I'm back to reconsidering this whole god thing again -- Letterman will not move to ABC. To steal a joke from John Stewart, those two would have gone together like cookies and ass. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: An After Work Cocktail The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 05:07:09 PM ----- BODY: An After Work Cocktail The Dow is up, NASDAQ closed basically unchanged, job growth is starting to snowball, and people are feeling generally good. Our soldiers are leaving a battlefield in a faraway land -- because the battle at Gardez is won. Pentagon repairs are nearing completion, and settlement checks are being written to the survivors of those lost on 9/11. We all wept last night at a TV show, but there is fire behind those wet eyes. The Arab world is unhappy with us, but they're mostly playing ball and not griping about it much more than usual. Europe is in the whining denial of the impotent, but our British friends are still by our side. Israel is bloodied but unbeaten. That's the state of the world six months after the attack that was supposed to bring on a clash of civilizations and engulf the world in fire. Next time I get too cranky and glum, will someone please remind me of these words I wrote today? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All the Cool Kids Are PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 05:28:17 PM ----- BODY: All the Cool Kids Are Doing It It started with Hawk Girl, was sort of endorsed by the InstantMan, and now Captain Scott is joining in. Kids, I'm bowing to popular demand for the first time ever: VodkaPundit is now a Rall Free Zone. Also, I propose a New Nickname Contest. Since we won't mention him, but will sometimes feel the unbearable urge to mock him, we must have a secret name for him. Something demeaning. And mean. Click on the Drinks below and add your suggestion. The winner will be determined by the totally arbitrary decision of the webmeister. UPDATE: The contest is now closed. The Unmentionable Cartoonist Nickname Contest winner will be announced in Tuesday's edition of VodkaPundit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Breaking News Megan McArdle nabs PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 05:32:01 PM ----- BODY: Breaking News Megan McArdle nabs an exclusive interview with al Qaeda Grand Poo-Bah Osama bin Laden. She quotes him saying, "na-na-na-boo-boo, I'm a psycho kill-er." You won't find reporting that hard-hitting on TV. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit: International Link of Mystery PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 05:34:33 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit: International Link of Mystery Don't ask, just click. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Foul Language Ahead I took PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 06:22:13 PM ----- BODY: Foul Language Ahead I took this graf from a Washington Post story about the public nastiness in this year's Oscar race: "It's out of control," said Universal spokeswoman Terry Curtin. "It's unfortunate that some people are stooping to that level. It's gotten to be so dirty. The last pure place that you thought you could go is completely tainted: the Academy race." Is any comment really necessary? Which blog did you think you were reading? (ahem) What kind of self-involved, self-important, ignorant-of-his-own-industry fuck is Terry Curtin? My bad -- he's just typical Hollywood. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Raised Glass Salute For PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/11/2002 06:33:13 PM ----- BODY: A Raised Glass Salute For those not paying attention to all those lovely links on the left side of this page, Beauty of Gray blogger Douglas Turnbull got himself engaged over the weekend. Congrats, Doug. That's the last decision you'll ever get to make by yourself. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tilting at Windmills Part IV PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:01:46 AM ----- BODY: Tilting at Windmills Part IV More fallout from President Bush’s craven cave-in to Big Steel, reported by Reuters (Motto: “One Man’s Wire Service Is Another Man’s Spontaneous Human Combustion”). Brazilian President Fernando Henrique Cardoso openly questioned Bush’s commitment to free trade yesterday – but it’s a pointless question. I think we all now know the answer is “extremely 100% totally committed, unless something else might gain some votes.” The sad part is, Brazil has been an economic basket case since World War II, largely because of the very protectionism Bush is now engaged in. If we want to help our neighbors, we must first set a good example. I do believe I’m now the last blogger writing on this issue. But damn the boredom! It’s important. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Raised Glass Salute It’s PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:08:41 AM ----- BODY: A Raised Glass Salute It’s slanted, it’s demeaning, it’s in the Guardian -- but it’s still a pretty damn good capsule look at how our “allies” in Europe are lining up for or against us in the War on Terror. I’d like to offer my own small apology to Italy and Spain for forgetting that they do stand beside us, even if they can’t offer much help. We have the planes and tanks and ships and men and officers. What we don’t have much of is moral support from those whom we would protect. So a big thank you to the governments and peoples of Spain and Italy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Importance of Not Being PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:11:46 AM ----- BODY: The Importance of Not Being Seen More on computer warfare and how not to get bombed, by the fearsome James Dunnigan. It occurs to me – and I’m probably the last to realize it – that StrategyPage is actually a multi-person blog, just like Samizdata. Only SP has been around much longer. Add it to your regular reading if you haven’t already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Odd Hobbies Department Anyone counting PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:15:16 AM ----- BODY: Odd Hobbies Department Anyone counting and categorizing hookers on his way home from work is my kind of guy. Mostly because I used to do the same damn thing when I lived in San Francisco. Am I the only one here who remembers the Eggplant Hooker on Geary Street from eight or nine years ago? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That’s Not a Raised Glass, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:17:37 AM ----- BODY: That’s Not a Raised Glass, But It’s Still a Salute Just because some people say he’s overcompensating as much as John Wayne Bobbit buying a ‘Vette, doesn’t mean that Kevin’s Large American Penis isn’t link-worthy. You'll find Kevin alongside the Unablogger in "Warned By the Bouncer" in the blogroll. Besides, that brunette has a truly killer arse. UPDATE: I had originally screwed up the first link in this post. All's well now. Welcome aboard, Kevin. Or welcome a broad. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Not Getting It Department PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:22:45 AM ----- BODY: Just Not Getting It Department The reliably stupid Nick Kristof writes in today’s New York Times: Just this month President Bush's "axis of evil" language enjoyed some success, by scaring the Iraqis into new discussions with the United Nations about weapons inspections. Comrade K., that speech was not some fancy-ass diplo-speak to get Saddam Hussein to talk. The “Axis of Evil” was fair warning to the bad guys, as well as laying the domestic and military groundwork to kill Saddam. Let’s say that out loud: Kill Saddam. Whatever you think of Bush’s policies, you cannot project your own “solution” to Iraq on the Administration. W’s plans are crystal clear: He is planning to invade Iraq, and remove Hussein from power via the No Longer Sucking Air Retirement Plan. Rome itself wasted no time with hearts and minds (it razed Carthage, salted the earth and sold surviving Carthaginians into slavery), yet Rome's harsh treatment of civilians abroad simply inspired more rebellions. Kristof doesn’t even have a high schooler’s grasp of history. Rome wasn’t sacked by the Spartans or the Gauls. Those peoples were defeated completely, and then just as completely made part of the Roman system. Rome was sacked, weakened, and eventually taken over by the Germanic tribes – tribes who were never conquered, never subdued, and never civilized. Rome’s far-flung provinces did indeed rebel from time to time. But the worst rebellions were in the least-Romanized areas. Such as, to name an especially tasty example, Palestine. To get even meatier, Judea (as it was known before the Romans took over) only settled down after the Jews were all forced to leave. Now, I don’t endorse a forced Diaspora for today’s Palestinians, I’m just pointing out yet another fact Kristof has neglected to tell you. We don’t have to salt the earth of Arabia like Rome did Carthage, but we certainly can’t listen to Nicolas Kristof and let the barbarians run wild. Sometimes the Goths leave the forests and come to kill you. While Churchill said that “jaw, jaw is better than war, war,” he did not say it was always preferable. Kristof can go talk to Hussein if he likes, but Bush will be making his meaning known more bluntly. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But No More Seriousness Here PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:25:10 AM ----- BODY: But No More Seriousness Here Than Usual Jackson Murphy pointed the way to an early George Will column -- and you'd rather slam your fingers in a car door than miss this one. For the record, I am stealing Will's phrase "the new seriousness," but I'm going to capitalize it. The New Seriousness. Feels good. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sometimes Either/Or Just Ain’t OpinionJournal's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:28:03 AM ----- BODY: Sometimes Either/Or Just Ain’t OpinionJournal's Brendan Miniter answers the most important question about the new anti-war movement: Is it pathetic or funny? The answer is "yes." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Have a Winner Emily PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:34:02 AM ----- BODY: We Have a Winner Emily Jones, one of my favorite bloggers, started the Ignore the Unmentionable Cartoonist trend. Perhaps the UC will just wither and die without negative attention. So yesterday I wrote: Since we won't mention him, but will sometimes feel the unbearable urge to mock him, we must have a secret name for him. Something demeaning. And mean. You sick, sick people (whom I love dearly) sent in some truly horrible suggestions (which I love just as dearly). I would tell you how difficult choosing the winner was, but since the selection was totally arbitrary and fueled with cheap brandy, there was really nothing to it. Here are the three runners up: 3. PatioPundit Martin for “Pup Tent.” 2. Charles Austin for removing the final E from Theodore and getting “The Odor.” 1. Pejman Yousefzadeh for “Arrogant Socially Stunted Hyperpathetic Orifice of Libelous Excrement.” I’ll leave it as an exercise for the reader to figure out the acronym. Our winner was selected for not only being mean-spirited, but for corrupting two of the world’s great languages, and a simple, childlike joy in cruel nicknames. So this website will take Dan Rector’s suggestion, and from now on refer to the Unmentionable Cartoonist only as: Señor Fartybutt I know those of you who didn’t win are hurt and disappointed and probably apoplectic, but please join me and Dan in giving a big Single Finger Salute to Señor Fartybutt. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That’s the Pot Calling the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:36:20 AM ----- BODY: That’s the Pot Calling the Kettle a Kitchen Implement In a sometimes touching eulogy for James Tobin, NYT crapweasel Paul Krugman writes: He was a great economist and a remarkably good man; his passing seems to me to symbolize the passing of an era, one in which economic debate was both nicer and a lot more honest than it is today. Is any comment really needed here? Crapweasel. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Pray It Isn’t True I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:40:31 AM ----- BODY: Pray It Isn’t True I can’t even comment on the possibility of Navy flyer Michael Speicher being an Iraqi captive for eleven years. Anything touching or heartbreaking or informative I might have to say was already written as fiction in a novel that’s sadly out of print. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: She's No Condi Janet Reno PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 11:14:45 AM ----- BODY: She's No Condi Janet Reno is the latest Democrat to hold a knife to her own throat by criticizing the war effort. "I have trouble with a war that has no endgame," she told a group of students at Old Dominion University, "and I have trouble with a war that generates so many concerns about individual liberties. Reno then added, "At Waco, you could be pretty damn sure that after you burned everyone to death, the thing would be pretty much over." Asked which people had what concerns over civil liberties, the former AG replied, "Like my right to kill religious minorites, or ship small children back to totalitarian dictatorships." The former U.S. attorney general said she thinks the government would be hard-pressed to find a legal basis to prosecute many of the Taliban and al-Qaida prisoners being detained at Guantanamo Bay. "As a former DA and attorney general, I'm no expert on law," Reno told reporters, "but I don't see how we can hold people we captured during a war, just because they were holding weapons and shooting at our soldiers." Reno, who served during Bill Clinton's two terms as president, took a break yesterday from running for the Democratic nomination for governor in Florida to make the ODU speech. She had agreed to the $20,000 speaking engagement before deciding to try to unseat Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, the president's brother. "Also," she explained, "Twenty grand will keep me in granny panties for a long, long time." The theme of Reno's speech in Norfolk was that lawyers should serve as problem-solvers and peacemakers as well as combatants. But in an hourlong talk with about a dozen students before her speech, she covered topics from Sept. 11 and the Branch Davidian disaster to Clinton and her run for office. After the speech, Reno admitted it had been difficult not to play with matches in a room filled with "so many, many helpless people." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: She's No Rice, Either In PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 11:19:20 AM ----- BODY: She's No Rice, Either In a revelation that has Republicans everywhere whispering, "Oh, sweet Jesus, please," Hillary Clinton now polls even with Al Gore for the 2004 Democratic Presidential nomination. Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle came in a distant third, and said he was "disappointed" in the results. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Proof the Peter Principle Was PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 11:30:18 AM ----- BODY: Proof the Peter Principle Was Optimisitic Homeland Security Big Cheese Tom Ridge has finally unveiled the nation's new -- and very pretty -- threat alert system. Instead of the old system, which used vague warnings such as "PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!!!" and "MOMMY!!!" the new system uses a five-tier color grade for different threat conditions. It works as follows: Green: Nothing currently blowing up. Blue: We're pretty sure there are shifty people somewhere. Mauve: Increased risk; might have something to do with Bea Arthur. Glen Plaid: Risky, yet tasteful. Bright Screaming Fuchsia: Imminent danger of a Rip Taylor show in your city. With the new system in place, Ridge now promises to go back to being usless and invisible. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Moore Is Less Our Favorite PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 11:36:25 AM ----- BODY: Moore Is Less Our Favorite Aussie reminds us why you don't piss off blokes. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Blogrolling If you haven't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 11:42:29 AM ----- BODY: More Blogrolling If you haven't caught it yet, read this entry from Steve Den Beste. He does it better than Welch this time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Too Mad For a Witty PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 11:53:24 AM ----- BODY: Too Mad For a Witty Headline Is anyone buying this crap about US troops being "inadequate" in the Gardez battle? Times Online reports. If our troops aren't adapting to new conditions, then training and doctrine must be upgraded. But until I see some confirmation, I'm filing this under "Anti-US Eurogarbage." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Señor Fartybutt Makes Me Rrrallph PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 11:56:21 AM ----- BODY: Señor Fartybutt Makes Me Rrrallph Jeff, if we have to pick just one degrading nickname for the Unmentionable Cartoonist, then the terrorists will have won. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Required Reading VodkaPundit gladly rips PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:00:33 PM ----- BODY: Required Reading VodkaPundit gladly rips idiots to shreds using drunken wit and the occasional bit of folk wisdom. What makes Megan McArdle clearly superior is she argues -- most unfairly! -- with actual facts. If you liked my takedown of Nick Kristof's idiotic rant about chicks with guns, you're gonna love Megan's. Go there now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Little Belgium Too Douglas PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:13:56 PM ----- BODY: And Little Belgium Too Douglas Turnbull does one of the best Fuck France essays in recent memory -- and all without a single naughty word. One thing though, Doug -- you gave credit where it wasn't due. Napolean was a Corsican. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We'll Be Funny and Useless PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 12:26:53 PM ----- BODY: We'll Be Funny and Useless Again In Just a Little While I hate to do so little news & satire and so much blogrolling, but the blogosphere is having a very, very good day. Read the latest Will Warren poetry to see what I mean. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We're Back At long last, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 04:12:37 PM ----- BODY: We're Back At long last, Blogger is working again. Now that VodkaPundit has moved to its own domain, I'll probably be switching over to Moveable Type for posting. This site will no longer be held hostage to the vagaries of Blogger. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Silly Conspiracy Theories Redux Mikhail PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/12/2002 04:25:22 PM ----- BODY: Silly Conspiracy Theories Redux Mikhail Gorbachev: Republican mole? First, Gorby made sure the Red Team lost the Cold War by the simple act of not sending tanks into Leipzig or Prague in 1989. He then acquiesced to George Bush pere's attack on the USSR's old ally, Iraq. When Boris Yeltsin -- with no legal authority -- announced the end of the Soviet Union in the fall of 2001, Gorbachev simply turned off the lights on his way out the Kremlin door. Now, Ol' Splotchy is attacking fellow pragmatic lefty Bill Clinton and praising right winger President George W. Bush. Coincidence? I wonder. Back in the 1970s, George Sr. spent some time as Ambassador to Communist China and served a stint as CIA chief. I ask you: What was Mikhail Gorbachev doing during those years? Did he spent time in Beijing? Were there secret meetings? I demand to see both their travel schedules from 1970-1979, inclusive. Next question: How long before someone takes this seriously? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why We Fight OpinionJournal has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:01:28 AM ----- BODY: Why We Fight OpinionJournal has the full text of President Bush’s 9/11 anniversary speech. Recommended reading, even if you caught it on TV. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No One Told Me W PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:05:19 AM ----- BODY: No One Told Me W Was So Funny You want to read this. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Too Perfect for Jokes It PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:10:46 AM ----- BODY: Too Perfect for Jokes It took the masochism of reading a Guardian column for me to discover that Mike Dukakis is now chairman of Amtrak. Is that rich or what? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Thought Only Ron Jeremy PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:17:27 AM ----- BODY: I Thought Only Ron Jeremy Could Do That Back stateside, NYT columnist Tom Friedman is back to blowing himself, now that he doesn’t have Prince Abdullah to do it for him. Mr. Mubarak emphasized that when the leader of Saudi Arabia, the birthplace of Islam, says in English, and in Arabic to his own press, that he is ready, in exchange for a total Israeli withdrawal, to have a "full normalization of relations" with the Jewish state — meaning trade, tourism and embassies — that is noteworthy, and is what caused all the buzz. What is noteworthy is that an otherwise intelligent writer, for whom I have deep respect, would fall for such a sham of a plan just because a head of state presented it to him personally. But will the Arab League adopt Abdullah's formula? Last weekend Arab foreign ministers met in Cairo to prepare for the March 27-28 Arab summit, where the Abdullah initiative is to be endorsed. In Cairo the Saudi foreign minister, Saud al-Faisal, was asked about the Abdullah proposal. He said that in return for Israel withdrawing to pre-1967 lines, and creating a Palestinian state with Jerusalem as its capital, the Arab League would offer Israel "full peace." That jarred my ear. Say that again? "Full peace?" Words are important here. "Full peace" is not what Abdullah offered. He said "full normalization of relations," and there is a difference. Ask Hosni Mubarak. Syria could live in "full peace" with Israel and not have any relations. Are the Saudis backpedaling? Not clear. Of course they’re backpedaling. And if the Saudis aren’t doing it themselves, they’ve hired out poorer Arabs to do their backpedaling for them. Saudi princes are like that. Friedman seems shocked, shocked to find this sort of behavior from people known, well, for exactly this sort of behavior. The fight now is between three different views: The first is Osama bin Laden's. His view is that there is no place for a Jewish state, or other "infidels," particularly Americans, in the Muslim world. Second is the view of the Syrians, who want to prove that they can get as much out of Israel as Anwar el-Sadat did, while giving less — like no normalization of relations, trade or tourism. The third view, the one adopted by Egypt and Jordan, and alluded to by Abdullah, is the notion that the only way you can have peace is if there is a real Israeli withdrawal and a real acceptance of Israel as a Jewish state in the region. That means using the term "normalization" of relations. Let’s remember something here. Something important. When Friedman says bin Laden sees “no place” for Israel, he really means, no place for Jews. Anywhere. Kill them all. Syria and even “friendly” Egypt still subscribe to that view, but being on the short end of a handful of wars has forced them to be more pragmatic. They’ll have to kill Jews retail instead of wholesale. And they have the Palestinians to do it for them. Israel will have to do its part, and withdraw on the basis of the 1967 lines. But it's time for the Arab League to get real: Anwar el-Sadat also demanded full withdrawal. The reason he got it, though, was not because of what he demanded, but because of the psychological breakthrough to Israelis that he offered first. The reason Abdullah's remarks tantalized some Israelis was because they offered "full normalization." This needs to be elaborated. If, instead, it's washed out by the Arab League, the whole exercise will be remembered as wasted breath. Stay tuned. Remember it as wasted breath? Consider it done. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: NHL Expansion Team: Cross Checkin’ PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:23:00 AM ----- BODY: NHL Expansion Team: Cross Checkin’ Balinese The Washington Times might have the best – or at least most fun – reporting on UNC’s new Fightin’ Whities basketball team. Frankly, I support the new name, if only because it might cause someone, somewhere, to think that average-height skinny-ass white guys might somehow have a basketball skill. People, I can’t hit the wastebasket under my desk from here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: New Sheriff In Town Thanks PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:24:06 AM ----- BODY: New Sheriff In Town Thanks to the mysterious Dr. Weevil for this very informed bit of eurobashing. Writing on the sad, sad postcolonial histories of the Belgian Congo and Rwanda, Dr. W observes: If rule by unelected bureaucrats in far-off Brussels leads inevitably to genocidal civil wars, brutal tyrannies, and total economic collapse, what does that tell us about the prospects of the European Union? Doc W is a teacher of history, and he tells me he’ll shortly be on Nick Kristof like mysterious white stains on a prom dress. You can find his blog here. This guy is good I might be up all night catching up on his stuff. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Next: New York Times Editors PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:27:35 AM ----- BODY: Next: New York Times Editors Apologize for “Unrelenting Smarminess” Apparently I’ll have all eternity to finally learn how to downhill ski – in Hell. Writing in the San Francisco Chronicle, columnist Debra Saunders chimes in with support for President Bush on his war aims – and she makes sense. In the Chron? Oh my. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And the Blog Rolls On PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:38:16 AM ----- BODY: And the Blog Rolls On Sarge is doing perhaps his best work ever -- and that's saying something. No links to any particular post. Just start at the top and work your way down. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Now I'm Feeling Old Margaret PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:46:40 AM ----- BODY: Now I'm Feeling Old Margaret Thatcher won't be returning to the Falklands to celebrate the UK victory there. Reports the Times Online: Sir Denis Thatcher’s increasing frailty has led the former Prime Minister to turn down an invitation to the Falklands to celebrate the 20th anniversary of the islands’ liberation on June 14. She was to be guest of honour. Lady M suffered a mild stroke herself recently, although all reports are she's as tough and feisty as ever. What I can't believe is that the Falklands War ended 20 years ago. It's the first war I'm able to remember from start to finish, having been 11 or 12 at the time. My most vivid recollection -- yours, too, I'm sure -- was the Britsh destroyer Sheffield lost to an Argentine Exocet missile. "Can they do that?" was my gut response to some tinpot country sinking a ship of war of the vaunted Royal Navy. Warmest thoughts to Maggie and Denis as they both grapple with age. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Still on CBS, Still a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 12:58:22 AM ----- BODY: Still on CBS, Still a Class Act Letterman lets American servicemen and women read his latest Top Ten List. Top Ten Reasons I Love America 10. Even after 225 years, it still has that new-country smell (Operation Specialist, Ron Morris) 9. Some of our best presidents were American (Lieutenant Jr. Grade, Erica Munzinger) 8. You're never more than 200 feet from a Dunkin' Donuts (Fire Controlmen 2nd Class, Nick Pavlinek) 7. Name one other country with an ex-wrestler for a governor (Gunner's Mate 1st Class, Paul Tialavea) 6. Years of scientific research have made it possible for us to have our eyeglasses ready in about an hour (Yeoman Seamen, Jeremiah Mason) 5. What other country has both a South Dakota and a North Dakota? (Cryptologic Technician Maintenance 2nd Class, Jason Halvorsen) 4. If somebody ever teachers a chimp to drive a car, it'll probably be an American (Electronics Technician 1st Class, Shawn Goodwin) 3. The uniforms look damn good (Damage Controlmen 2nd Class, James Laban) 2. None of our current or former leaders live in a cave (Gunner's Mate 3rd Class, Elijah Muse) 1. Where else could a geek like Letterman get his own show? (Electronics Technician 3rd Class, Gregory Allen Davis II) ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Juvenile Pranks for Grown-Ups Señor PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 01:00:58 AM ----- BODY: Juvenile Pranks for Grown-Ups Señor Fartybutt truly is a moron. Click the link, then click the first button. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You'll Need Some Coffee Before PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 02:11:05 AM ----- BODY: You'll Need Some Coffee Before Tackling This One Thanks to PatioPundit Martin for pointing me to the latest Michael Kelly hours before I would have found it myself. Kelly argues that Arafat fights in phases, calibrated for the desired response: The first major phase of the current war was the Palestinian uprising, or intifada, which began in 1987. The second major phase was an interlude of peace, which centered on a negotiating process that effectively began with the Oslo accord in 1993 and effectively ended with the Camp David failure of July 2000. The third major phase is what is generally called the second intifada, the killing that began when the Palestinians rejected the peace process and returned to active war in September 2000. Each violent phase has grown more violent -- by the Palestinians. The lopsided death counts of Intifada I are much more even this go around. But the key was the relative lack of killings 10-15 years ago. Moral outrage against Israel led to Oslo, which led to Camp David. At Camp David, Israel of- fered extraordinary concessions. These included the transfer of 88 percent to 95 percent of West Bank territory to the Palestinian Authority, the forced evacuation of 40,000 Jewish settlers, the return of some Palestinian refugees and the surrender of some Jerusalem neighborhoods. Arafat declared this to be not enough. Camp David was a failure for Israel, for humanity and for the two feckless and self-deluding men, Bill Clinton and Ehud Barak, who brought it to pass. But it was not at all a failure for Arafat and his long-term strategy. Indeed, in the logic of Arafat's war of phases, "failure" was the necessary opening to the next level of war. So Arafat has played by Head I Win/Tails You Lose rules -- and the world has let him get away with it. Kelly's solution? What Israel must do is to adopt its own version of Arafat's phased war approach; it must pursue peace, or appear to pursue peace, as a phase in the longer war. It must meet Palestinian war with relentless war in return. But, simultaneously, it must become the aggressor in a new peace process -- whether or not that process will ultimately lead to a peace Israel can accept. There's just one problem here, kids. When you offer (even fake) concessions to Arabs, they see it as weakness and emboldens them to new lows of barbarity. I'm not there yet, but I'm becoming more of a mind that the only way for Israel to protect its borders is to annex the West Bank and expel every last Palestinian. I hope it doesn't come to that, but if it does -- I won't blame Israel. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Googlebombing Is Allowed Under the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 02:19:17 AM ----- BODY: Googlebombing Is Allowed Under the Geneva Conventions The following text and links were lifted directly from Megan McArdle's Jane Galt, in an effort to Googlebomb away shoddy civilian death statistics from the Afghan campaign. Feel free to "View Source" and copy it for your blog, too. You don't need to click the links to make the Googlebomb, so just scroll on down to my next post. "Kill Marc Herold Afghan casualties meme by Googlebombing it. For the uninitiated, “Googlebombing” takes advantage of the fact that Google gives a high ranking to regularly updated sites; this means that if a lot of bloggers link to, say, Iain Murray’s take-down of the Herold Afghan casualties study, using relevant search terms like Afghanistan civilian casualties and Herold collateral damage and Marc Herold Afghanistan study, we can move Iain’s article to the top of Google’s search results." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Excuses Excuses Sorry for the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 02:18:27 PM ----- BODY: Excuses Excuses Sorry for the lack of new stuff today. Had a religious experience -- that's a hair cut for me, kids -- and some other errands to run. But I'm back to work now. UPDATE: The lovely and talented Stacy Tabb (of Sekimori Design fame) has convinced me to make the move to Movable Type. We might experience some delays, and your seat cushion can be used as a floatation device in the event of a water landing. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Caution: Extreme Vitriolic Satire Ahead PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 02:47:01 PM ----- BODY: Caution: Extreme Vitriolic Satire Ahead Al Gore has apparently thrown down the gauntlet, tossed his hat into the ring, gotten his beard too near the wood chipper. In this Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Uncontrollable Gastritis") report, the former Vice President and ongoing Disney Audioanimatronic Project, attacked President Bush on taxes, the enviornment, the War, the merits of Clairol versus Just for Men, and the Middle East. Speaking at an underground fundraiser for Rep. Richard Neal (Dem., Mass.S.S.R.), Gore said, "The principle of checks and balances ... is something every American ought to be thinking about during this campaign season." His voice rising to be heard above the sounds of heads diving asleep into dinner plates, Gore added, "Perhaps what is needed is a 13-point study by a 15-member commission on the elimination of targeted tax credit pre-payment deferral for those who engage in domestic urban/aerial protest actions, the nature of which some persons have at times defined as terroristic." The former Veep was also unhappy with President Bush's 1.35 trillion dollar tax cut, saying, "It seems unfair to me to remove from the Treasurial lockbox monies deposited there for safekeeping by our Federal custodians, and to return that money in the form of rebate checks and/or future rate reductions (not to exclude also the creation of new tax shelters, or 'loopholes') to those taxpayers who paid the vast majority of those taxes in the first place." When asked how he manages to speak paranthetically, Gore replied, "It takes a lot of pretention, and a corn cob like you wouldn't believe. Got any lotion?" Gore's 2000 running mate, Senator Joe Lieberman, was supposed to have also been in attendence, but backed out at the last minute. Lieberman himself could not be reached for comment, but a spokesman blurted out in uncontrolled fits of teary laughter when asked why his boss ducked out of an appearence with Gore. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit SIOP SIOP is one PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 03:07:45 PM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit SIOP SIOP is one of those nasty Pentagon acronyms, only this one is even nastier than it sounds. The Single Integrated Operating Plan is Big Book o' Holocaust -- it details every nuclear target for every contingency. Hell, there probably are plans in there for how to nuke in Germany should neo-Nazis ever gain power. I don't normally read NRO's The Corner, but Kevin pointed out that I'm in it today -- along with Sarge and Megan. Apparently, we're nuke-mongers. Here then, are the targets on the VodkaPundit SIOP: Whichever fool failed to plan for a right turn lane on northbound Academy at Woodmen. The RIAA in its entirety PhD's without an MD but insist on being called "Doctor." The Olsen Twins Anyone asking "Where's it at?" Parents who keep their children on those retractable leashes That fourth friggin' dentist who won't endorse Dentyne. Jamie Lee Curtis, for failing to return my many phone calls in 1983. Consider yourselves warned. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Check for Local Listings I'll PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 03:14:24 PM ----- BODY: Check for Local Listings I'll be watching Enterprise tonight, and you should, too. Happy Fun Pundit's Dan is right -- it is our sacred duty to watch the show, even if it sucks, just because The Nation hates its machismo, its sense of wonder in exploration, its inter-species conflict. Also, that Vulcan chick has got a great can. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Flag-Waving, Pants-Dropping, Whatever Gets Attention PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 03:18:37 PM ----- BODY: Flag-Waving, Pants-Dropping, Whatever Gets Attention Forget the Prof's shameless self-promotion for a sec, and go read his TCS column. It really is that good. I hope Glenn knows I'm kidding about the self-promotion part. VodkaPundit is nothing but shameless self-promotion. Also, I like knowing there's a large audience out there when a get really witty and erudite and use phrases like "a great can." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: StupidityWatch The Washington Post Foreign PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 03:26:23 PM ----- BODY: StupidityWatch The Washington Post Foreign Service has some particularly nasty anti-Israeli reporting today. As Israeli forces rumbled close to his house, 54-year-old Abdul Rahman Izzadin headed up the stairs and called down to his wife, children and grandchildren to stay indoors. Those were the last words they heard him say. At the top of the stairs, as he reached to close the metal door leading to the rooftop, he was shot three times -- in the ear, neck and cheek -- and killed instantly, apparently by an Israeli sniper on the roof of an adjacent house that neighbors said the army had commandeered. Moments later, when Izzadin's 36-year-old son Walid rushed to his father's aid, he, too, was shot to death. It is not known why they were fired upon. Hello, there's a war on. They were male and foreign. Typically, that's all it takes to get your ass shot in a war. Is that fair? Nope. But it is the way the world works. I wish things were different -- but wishes ain't Kevlar. I might be too stupid to be an international reporter, but I can still give better advice: When you hear tanks and soldiers coming by your house, it is deadly serious business. Deadly serious. Do not go outside to gawk. Do not stand in the window. Don't even point a finger. Just stay inside and cover your wife and children. Then if you get shot, at least you'll have died trying to do something useful. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Now That's a Scary Threesome PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 03:35:33 PM ----- BODY: Now That's a Scary Threesome Andrew Sullivan on Rosie O'Donnell's coming out. It's not often Sullivan and Rosie will agree -- and rarer still I'll agree with the both of them. But there you have it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Roll Out the Blogs Why PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 03:43:56 PM ----- BODY: Roll Out the Blogs Why did no one tell me Natalie Solent was back to fulltime blogging? As of this moment, Natalie is out from Under the Table and back to Luncheon Cordials where she belongs. UPDATE: Natalie led the way to a fascinating Telegraph column on foreign steel, Russian oil, and a real power shift from the Persian Gulf to the Caspian Sea. Read it. Another thought. I'm hearing more about Russia dropping her objections against our impending campaign against their old friend in Baghdad. Tit for tat? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Not a Paid Endorsement My PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 03:51:51 PM ----- BODY: Not a Paid Endorsement My Capitalist Chicks coffee mug arrived today. I'm now drinking out of a leggy corporate gal in a great suit. Let's not tell Melissa. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Raised Glass Salute I don't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 04:00:10 PM ----- BODY: Raised Glass Salute I don't know who or what BusinessBay is, I only know they've linked me along side such notables as NRO, Lucianne Goldberg, and Reason. Thanks, guys. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Let's Hope They're Scared Those PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 04:10:20 PM ----- BODY: Let's Hope They're Scared Those who makes fun of President Bush's occassional mangling of the English language -- and I'm one of them -- should remember that, sometimes, plain speaking works best. "The reason one has a nuclear arsenal is to serve as a deterrence. We've got all options on the table because we want to make it very clear to nations that you will not threaten the United States or use weapons of mass destruction against us or our allies or friends." Bush's meaning is clear -- and that makes a WMD attack on us less likely, not more. Deterrence only works when they believe you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Read the Whole Thing Excellent PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 05:08:11 PM ----- BODY: Read the Whole Thing Excellent reporting by Hawk Girl Emily Jones. On China's "shock" about being targeted by US nukes: "Charlie Sheen 'shocked' to find himself in hooker's Rolodex." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tonight's Reading Assignment Austin Bay PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/13/2002 06:07:41 PM ----- BODY: Tonight's Reading Assignment Austin Bay is back with another incisive column on StrategyPage. Read the intro, then just try not to read it all: It's been a tough six months for knee-jerk anti-Americanism, be it the European elite, Arab street or left-wing academic petite variety. The pit that was the World Trade Center and 3,000 murders perpetrated by suicidal zealots are hard, fast facts. While denial of facts has never been a problem for the "blame America" crowd (heck, some arch-left cadres still insist Alger Hiss wasn't a Soviet spy), the missing Manhattan skyline is simply too explicit. There is no escape from the emptiness, that space in the air. That's just the great beginning to a lovely, bitter rip on moral equivalency. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Gorgeous Haunting subject, beautiful words. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:02:14 AM ----- BODY: Gorgeous Haunting subject, beautiful words. Do yourself a favor and read Claudia Rosett today. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Makes Me Long for Dowd PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:07:16 AM ----- BODY: Makes Me Long for Dowd I don’t even know where to start with Mary McGrory’s latest spittle-covered invective against the Administration’s proposed “changes” to US nuclear doctrine. “Nuts About Nukes” is the headline, which, for once, pretty much sums up McGrory’s entire piece. I won’t bore you taking the whole thing apart, but here are the gems: [It could be the] work of doomsday planners who have at last succeeded in selling their idea that nuclear weapons are no different from the conventional kind and equally useful in combat. Secretary Rumsfeld was having the novel experience of playing host to an official whose country found its name on the target list that is a feature of the review. The Pentagon reviewers may seem to be activating the nuclear trigger by asserting that we will use nuclear weapons against any nation threatening biological or chemical warfare. Barry Goldwater traversed the country peddling tactical battlefield nukes no bigger than a fountain pen. Dear Whomever, it just goes on. I’ll give four quick replies to the four quick snippets I quoted. Nuclear arms are proven effective. They spared us an extra million casualties against the Japanese Empire. If they would spare another million US soldiers, I would advocate we use them again. But they won’t, so I don’t. Anything more useful than a brick in the old USSR used to have a nuke targeted on it. And yet our people met with their people daily. Rumsfeld experienced nothing novel at all. We only promised not to use nukes against non-nuclear nations so long as they didn’t use other WMDs against us. That threat may be the only thing that spared our troops in Iraq from the joys of nerve gas. Barry Goldwater believed that in a war, you scare your enemies. And that’s exactly what he was trying to do to the North Vietnamese. And dragging out Barry after four decades? Sad, Mary. If that’s what I can do with four lines taken at random, you can imagine how bad the whole thing is. Read it if you dare. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Fishbarelling With a Shotgun I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:25:16 AM ----- BODY: Fishbarelling With a Shotgun I love the Guardian -- who else could provide us with fresh moral outrage and a good snicker each and every working day? Here’s a head and sub-head from the Thursday edition: Mugabe win destroys west's policy Britain and other western countries left frustrated and impotent after Robert Mugabe formally declared victory. The Guardian dared to use the word impotent to a EUnich? The EU “policy” towards Mugabe was to threaten him, maybe, someday, with some sort of economic sanctions if he didn’t cut down the slaughter to a level where it was no longer newsworthy. And how were economic sanctions to work against a dictator who has his money in Switzerland already, and who presides over a nation that no longer has an economy? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Said the Same Thing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:26:46 AM ----- BODY: I Said the Same Thing Late Saturday Night It dawns on me that Dick Cheney is the perfect man for the President’s current diplomatic offensive in the Middle East. He’s a smart, terse man with a smart, terse message: Brace yourselves; we’re coming. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Jack 2004 Good news for PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:29:07 AM ----- BODY: Jack 2004 Good news for Jack & Karen fans -- NBC will pony up 300 million to keep the show on for three more years. Well, at least I know what I'll be doing for 72 more Thursday nights. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Nattering Nabobs of Naptime Bill PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:32:17 AM ----- BODY: Nattering Nabobs of Naptime Bill Safire is the latest to chime in with sensible support for the so-called “Shadow Government.” This is the first I’ve mentioned the subject, because the only thing I can think is, “Why is this news?” We learned years ago of the secret Congressional hideaway near the Greenbrier in West Virginia. (I was fortunate enough to spend a few childhood Christmases at the Big Green G. I hope to be able to afford to do it as an adult someday.) Most people are, I’m sure, at least dimly aware that the President and Vice President don’t generally fly together (in event of a, uh, water landing). And other precautions too numerous – and too damn mundane – to mention. It’s a boring non-issue, about which I’ve said my first and last words. Now someone tell Safire to quite phoning it in. That’s two lame bits in just the last week or so. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Damascus High Class of 2012 PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:44:52 AM ----- BODY: Damascus High Class of 2012 StratFor publishes another special for WorldNetDaily. Today's topic is possibility of an explosive crisis in the Arab world. Stop laughing -- they mean something even worse than normal daily existence. Driven by a burgeoning youth population, stagnant economies and the regionally unpopular U.S. war on terrorism, domestic challenges in many Arab states are nearing critical mass. Arab governments are moving to counter this trend and have taken a number of unusual or unprecedented steps in recent months. But the measures so far are half-hearted at best and will not resolve the underlying pressures nor halt a surge in popular unrest in the coming year. Too many angry young men, too few jobs, no freedom to change it. Oh, plus a hefty dollop of state-sponsored religious fanatacism. A U.S. military campaign against Iraq will only exacerbate these resentments. Many Arab governments such as Egypt, Jordan and Saudi Arabia may not support the war. But given their own intimate relationships with the U.S. government, they aren't likely to oppose it with anything more than rhetoric either. This will stoke tension between frustrated and angry Arab citizens and their governments. So in making it better, we'll first make it worse. Really, that strikes me as the strongest possible endorsement of not just toppling Saddam, but of Marshall Planning Iraq. And not just Iraq, but any Arab nation whose government topples under the triple pressures of autocracy, stale economics, and the New War. A new colonialism? Perhaps -- but under the peacekeeping auspices of the UN to take away some of the sting. At the same time, a population bulge combined with high unemployment is creating a pressure-cooker scenario across the board. More than 50 percent of the population in Egypt, Jordan, Saudi Arabia and Syria is under 25. Ah, impressionable youth. If they can be turned to terror under the tutelege of Riyadh-sponsored mullahs, why can't they be turned to Kylie Minogue and the profit motive under our care? Read the whole story. There's some hard stuff there, but I don't find it bleak. Just makes you want to roll up your sleeves and get to work. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Know Our Casualties and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:52:13 AM ----- BODY: We Know Our Casualties and That's What Counts Barry Bearak does some good reporting from the Shah-I-Kot Valley for the New York Times today. However, he seems a little frustrated about not being able to get reliable casualty figures from the battle south of Gardez. First, you don't count enemy dead until you can do so safely. Second, Bush warned us already that this was a war where much would remain a mystery. I don't have a problem with that. Not so long as the House and Senate intelligence and armed forces committees are kept informed. If at least our most trusted representitives don't get good info, then it'll be time to raise unholy hell. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Ve Haff Vays of Making PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:57:37 AM ----- BODY: Ve Haff Vays of Making You Schmile Mr. Happy Smiley Family Mickey Mouse Disney Man Michael Eisner likes to threaten people with jail when they don't do his electronic bidding. Testifying to Congress about getting Intel and others to help stop file-swapping and CD backups, Eisner said: "I believe if you say to these people, `You get us a system by Dec. 31 or we'll do it for you,' you'll be surprised at how innovative they'll become," Mr. Eisner told the lawmakers at last month's hearing. You can read the whole disgusting thing here at the NYT. And I get a new argument with Melissa on why we should keep our future children Disney free. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Something Chocolaty and With Macadamia PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:58:13 AM ----- BODY: Something Chocolaty and With Macadamia Nuts Opinion Journal's Collin Levey is the latest to take on Chicks with Guns. Well, not literally -- that would be foolhardy in the extreme. My take was funnier and beat Levey's by six days. I want a cookie. Also, compare something these two snippets: 1. Women are exactly the kind of people you do want owning guns. One look at the demographics of violent crime tells you about all you need to know. Guns don't kill people, men kill people. 2. As John Lott demonstrated a couple years ago, the vast majority of those killed will be bad men, by good women, in self-defense. Who wrote which? If you guessed VodkaPundit wrote the first one, you owe me another cookie. I wrote the second one. The only difference is, I did it first. Advantage: VodkaPundit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Damn Snowbacks Steal All Our PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 01:21:07 AM ----- BODY: Damn Snowbacks Steal All Our Good Comedy Jobs Canada's own BCM's take on the Loonie's long, slow fall against the US dollar: Of course our beer is better. We need something good to cry into. Watering American beer with tears would be redundant. Shh -- no one tell Em he said that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: At Least He Didn't Mention PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 10:23:30 AM ----- BODY: At Least He Didn't Mention My Favorite Martian Link via Drudge. "Terrorism made din Laden irritable" reads the headline from a This Is London story. Well, terrorism has made all of us here in the USA angry since 9/11. Osama, don't make us angry. You wouldn't like us when we're angry. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Now They Need To Get PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 10:30:22 AM ----- BODY: Now They Need To Get Sensible About Guns The UK is set to de facto legalize pot. Were that this country could only be so smart. Pot isn't my kind of drug -- it makes me stupid and lethargic when I much prefer being witty and hyper. But to continue persuing a losing war on drugs when we have a War on Terror we can't afford to lose... well, the drug war seems like wasted resources, at best. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Nukes Is Good Nukes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 10:33:28 AM ----- BODY: No Nukes Is Good Nukes Rich Lowry on North Korea: "The Intelligence Community judged in the mid-1990s that North Korea had produced one, possibly two, nuclear weapons." That means North Korea may already be a nuclear-weapon state. This is news. No, it isn't news. That first line, about the mid-1990s? Well, that's when it was news. And it was all over the news. Most people just forgot about it, because Clinton did his Magical Reality Disappearing Act on foreign policy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Keyboard Levitation Moment Kevin's Large PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 11:16:30 AM ----- BODY: Keyboard Levitation Moment Kevin's Large American Penis has become the website the Unablogger could have -- should have! -- been. Or maybe I'm just biased towards darker-haired cheesecake with actual hips. If the Unablogger is up for the Slate editor gig, how about we petition to get Kevin placed in charge of Playboy? Nothing but cookie cutter Barbie dolls month after month got me to cancel my subscription. How about it, Stacy? Want to get something organized? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: AOL Found Guilty of War PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 11:19:58 AM ----- BODY: AOL Found Guilty of War Crimes Megan McArdle takes a good, hard look at the real monopolist in the browser wars – Netscape! Remember the great Browser War? It all seems so ’98. How quaint. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Rather Think We Are PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 12:49:10 PM ----- BODY: I Rather Think We Are Are Bloggers saving the world from Peter Jennings? Visit the cutting Edge of England’s Sword to find out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Breathtaking Lucianne has the best PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 01:15:54 PM ----- BODY: Breathtaking Lucianne has the best picture yet of the Tribute in Light. Please take a look. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Excuses Excuses Excuse the lack PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/14/2002 06:02:04 PM ----- BODY: Excuses Excuses Excuse the lack of posts. As I'm sure you know, Blogger was down for several hours this afternoon. Sometime in the next week, this sight will be running on Movable Type rather than Blogger. Between the new host and the new blogware, you shouldn't be seeing any more downtime. And now Melissa and I have plans to spend a lovely evening together over pizza. I'll be back later tonight. UPDATE: Thanks to a second Blogger outage, I didn't get the apology posted until a second apology was needed. Also, Melissa has gone back home for the night. I'll be up a while longer. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Excuses Guess what? You PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 11:17:04 AM ----- BODY: More Excuses Guess what? You can get only five hours sleep per night for so long before it all catches up with you. I was gone by 10 last night. Out. Asleep. This from a man who considers any bedtime before 2am to be early. Anyway, I slept well, got my teeth cleaned, and am ready to get back to work. Also, it's snowing and I don't want to go outside. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tough Cases Make Bad Law PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 11:18:41 AM ----- BODY: Tough Cases Make Bad Law I agree with Krauthammer. Hate me if you must. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Following Post Is Rated PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 11:46:07 AM ----- BODY: The Following Post Is Rated NC-17 Nicholas Kristof has become my new favorite subject for live dissection. Today, let’s take a look at his spleen. SANA, Yemen — It was reassuring to find myself almost arrested as I arrived in this magical country. Suspicious immigration officials at the airport noted that I had only a carry-on bag, stuffed with electronic gear, and that my passport had Pakistani and Afghan visas. Worried that I might be an agent of Osama bin Laden, they seized my passport and took me aside — over the protests of the Information Ministry official who had come to the airport to welcome me and show me Yemeni hospitality. That’s a start almost worthy of Robert Fisk, only Fisk would have gone into a lot of detail about his prison shower fantasy. After 45 minutes and a dozen phone calls, I was freed. But without the Information Ministry to vouch for me, several officials said, I might have been interrogated all night as a suspected terrorist. Kristof is still sounding way too upbeat about all this. Is he praising Yemeni authorities for their thoroughness, or is he venting some truly twisted submission fantasies in a family paper? The experience was a reminder that Yemen is, belatedly, trying to crack down on terrorism. Indeed, Yemen is becoming a model for the way the Bush administration's war on terror can force governments to take sterner actions on their own. Please, Whomever, don’t let those sterner actions involve nuns and a cat o’ nine tails. Idiot that I am, I’m going to keep reading. Unfortunately, the Bush administration's plans to send American troops here may undermine the good work. The troops will be a token, fewer than 100, and are meant simply to train Yemeni soldiers, but it's hard to see that they can accomplish much — other than to turn public opinion against America. What, suddenly Our Boys aren’t butch enough for Nick? I don’t care which porch he swings on, but let’s not insult our armed forces ability to toughen up the locals. "If the American troops come here, then at some point I will end up bearing arms against them," warned an American-educated, pro-Western Yemeni man. This prickliness, this deep suspicion of the motives of foreign troops, is very widespread and will complicate the mission of the American forces in Yemen. Yeah, Kristof has some serious wood for Yemen soldiers. First, he liked the idea of spending all night being (ahem) interrogated by them, now he’s saying their men are tougher than our men. Or maybe he just likes those foreign, swarthy types – he also claimed we couldn’t handle the Taliban. Hell, I like those dark-skinned ones, so I know where Nick is coming from here. I’m marrying an American girl, but she’s brunette and has a great tan. Sheikh Othman Mujali al-Fayid, a member of Parliament and traditional tribal leader in the northern city of Sada, invited me into his home for a sumptuous lunch. We squatted on the floor around 20-odd dishes of (forgive the technical terms) brown gobs and green gook, which we all ate with our fingers, followed by dessert of yellow goop with honeycomb on top. It was delicious. But his warning was as sharp as the honey was sweet: "People do not accept foreign powers in Yemen. We don't want anyone involved in our business." Nope, they don’t like foreigners in Yemen. But they sure like to sit on the floor with honey and spend some time with fresh meat from New York. Hell, I’m getting turned on here. Fortunately, aside from antagonisms arising from plans for the American troops, the new crackdown is enjoying an impressive start. Radical Muslim students from foreign countries (including America) have been booted out of Yemen. Bin Laden tapes are now no longer displayed in stalls (though they're still sold under the table). Radical Muslims are keeping their heads down. I don’t know where to start here. Should I go with the impressive crackdown, or the radical Muslims with their heads down and under the table? Forget it. No joke is necessary – I think you got the visual. Damn, Nick! When I tried to visit al-Iman University, the militant Muslim institution where John Walker Lindh studied, armed soldiers turned me away. It seems virtually defunct. Rejection is awful, Nick. But that’s no reason to put down a perfectly fine radical university breeding ground of terrorism. All this underscores that President Bush has made a difference here simply by putting terrorism on top of the international agenda. So the question is this: Why do we feel the need to add a military element by sending troops into places like Yemen? First rejection, now he’s afraid, I guess, of the competition. If the old rumors have any truth to them, he shouldn’t get really worried until we send in the Navy. Sure, American troops are essential in some countries, like Afghanistan, where even more are needed to provide security. But sending American soldiers to places like Yemen, where the great majority of people seem to oppose their arrival, raises precisely the problems of over-deployment that President Bush complained about during his campaign. Nick, don’t let your desire blind you. Afghans welcomed our arrival when we were kicking Taliban ass. But if we overstay our welcome there, they’ll turn on us like they do all foreign occupiers. We’re never welcome anywhere that doesn’t have Soviet tanks right on the other side of the border, and sometimes not even then. It's a complex land that we're sending our troops to. I've had a very nice driver here, and after two days of chatting I found out the names of his two young sons. The elder is Ayman, for Ayman al-Zawahiri, the No. 2 leader in Al Qaeda. And the baby is called Osama. Yeah, as opposed to the simplicity of Afghan politics. When I described Yemen as magical a moment ago, I didn't just mean the allure of a beautiful mountainous landscape. It is also a murky, shadowy place with a long tradition of genies, monsters like the tahish (which eats all humans except for female virgins), islands that make themselves invisible to prevent invasion, and cannibal witches who eat their victims as a gravy, become pregnant, give birth to a cat-like creature with oversized sexual organs and — alas, then the narrative becomes too much for a family newspaper. Oh, we crossed that line ages ago. In short, Yemen is about as far as one can go, culturally, from America. Which, really, just makes it that much hotter. So while the antiterror campaign has enjoyed an excellent start in Yemen, I worry about the next phase, involving American troops. How will the American soldiers negotiate this complex political landscape, how will they overcome the prickly Yemeni nationalism, and what will happen if they meet a tahish? What will happen? Something steamy, I’d bet. Look for Nick’s second installment either in Penthouse Forum or the Advocate, I’m not sure which. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why I'm an Atheist, Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 12:00:33 PM ----- BODY: Why I'm an Atheist, Part 1,000,006 Link via Drudge: Tipper considering Senate run. If she should win, however, might be proof of Satan. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Just In Case, We PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 12:08:57 PM ----- BODY: But Just In Case, We Have Some Lovely Parting Gifts President Bush managed to pull off one nice bit of diplomacy, ending a terrible fortnight. Russian Foreign Minister Igor Ivanov said that even though his nation does not approve of a US-led attack on trade buddy Saddam Hussien, Russia will remain in the anti-terror coalition. Chalk one small one up for the good guys. It's been a while. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No, I Am Your Father PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 12:17:11 PM ----- BODY: No, I Am Your Father Mac Thomason, War Liberal, is slowly coming over to the Dark Side. Love your work, Mac, but when you're supporting free markets, recognizing the value of the US Navy in protecting free trade, admiring free trade, and the talking about the value of a Western education... well, it might be time to drop the word "liberal." Welcome aboard. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Not Your Usual Crotch Shot PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 12:23:21 PM ----- BODY: Not Your Usual Crotch Shot Watching Fox this morning before getting ready to experience white knuckles and flop sweat at the dentist (I hate cleanings), they had a funny, mean little dig at CNN. As you probably already know, anchor and former naked actress Andrea Thompson is leaving CNN Headline News. Nice rack, lousy anchor. So this morning's Fox phone-in question was, "Which actress should CNN hire next?" That was below the belt. And I love it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Good News/Angry News Bill Gertz PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 12:35:39 PM ----- BODY: Good News/Angry News Bill Gertz does his usual good job, this time reporting on the aftermath of Anaconda. I'll highlight the best bits. [Gardez] demonstrated the power of combined arms, the professionalism of young Army infantrymen participating in their first combat, and the stupidity of al Qaeda fighters holed up in caves in the area south of Gardez. On those "brilliant" al Qaeda fighters: "Part of the light infantry usefulness is that it appears that the al-Qaeda pride just can't abide our guys on their turf, so we make effective 'bait,' pulling the bad guys out of their holes," the officer said in a report to colleagues, describing the first use of conventional ground troops in the war in Afghanistan. "However, because they are not so smart, they try to attack uphill to the ground we own, and between direct and indirect [mortars and close air support] fires we absolutely chew them up. In a one-on-one fight our soldiers are better trained and equipped and work together well — which gives us the advantage now that we control the high ground. Couple that with all the technological advantages we bring to the battlefield and it is not a fair fight, which is just the way we like it. Now, what was that idiot Times story about how US soldiers were too incompetent to fight at Gardez? You might want to drop them a note. UPDATE: I missed the best quote in the story from that Army officer: "Anyway, as I am sure you do not, don't listen to the doomsayers in the press. It seems they would like nothing better than for us to suffer a resounding defeat, but it just ain't gonna happen. Our guys are good and have more guts." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'm Still Angry About Tipper's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 12:56:31 PM ----- BODY: I'm Still Angry About Tipper's PMRC The Prof just linked me again -- and it's much appreciated. Show your appreciation by encouraging Glenn to run for Senate as a Democrat. He would get Tipper out of the damn news and kick Lamar's ass come November. I had a Karenna Gore joke, but it's too dirty, even for me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Finally: A Post With No PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 12:58:59 PM ----- BODY: Finally: A Post With No Porn References Fidel Castro just can't stand the heat -- from Camp X-Ray. Humor from StrategyPage. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 01:05:59 PM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part VI How do you know a stealth bomber has arrived? Your mountain turns into a lake. More from Gertz: Pentagon sources tell us the new bomb is being developed for the Air Force by Northrop Grumman Corp. in California and is called Big BLU — for bomb live unit. The new bomb will be bigger and more powerful than the new BLU-118 thermobaric warhead dropped on caves in Afghanistan recently. Big BLU, we are told, will be six times bigger than the F-15E-carried thermobaric bomb and will be packed with some 30,000 pounds of high explosive. It will be guided to targets by satellite and will sport a cobalt-alloy penetrating warhead that allows the bomb to dive up to 100 feet below the surface before detonating. The bombs are so big that it will take a B-2 bomber to carry one of them, we are told. Three Big BLUs have been ordered by the Air Force on an urgent basis. Do we really need compact nukes when we can build this kind of "conventional" explosive? And how am I going to convince Melissa I need one? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Good To Be Right PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 01:33:55 PM ----- BODY: It's Good To Be Right When Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neil announced the nation was out of recession, I wrote: O'Neil predicts 3-3.5% growth for 2002, but I'd bet a little higher. 3.5-4.0%. Seriously. If you can find a cheap index fund... In today's National Review Online, La Jolla Economics experts Victor Canto and Peter Mork write: At the beginning of the year, in a special Wall Street Journal report, top economists weighed in with an average forecast of 2.59% growth for 2002. That number will now be revised upwards to approach the 4% range. This time, I beat the experts by ten days. Advantage: VodkaPundit. UPDATE: I wasn't kidding about finding a cheap index fund. And no, I won't be giving out free advice. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Too Mad To Vent Link PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 02:01:19 PM ----- BODY: Too Mad To Vent Link via Andrea Harris. My twenty-two year flirtation with the Libertarian Party is over. Two time LP presidential candidate and full time nutbag Harry Browne claims "Bin Laden wins Afghan war." Here are some lines to make you boil: Americans are claiming victory because American bombers have devastated Afghanistan, thousands of Afghans have been killed, and the already-impoverished country is now almost completely in ruins. We're claiming victory because, well, we killed a lot of the bad guys, sent the others running, and installed a coalitions government that's allowing inidividual liberty. I'm sorry, Harry, if you despise a policy that protects American lives while promoting freedom. Funny, I thought that what libertarianism was supposed to be about. As for the Afghan civilian deaths, I think we know all about those numbers. I can't go on with this article. It is such a hate-filled screed -- not only against the US, but (predictably) against Israel, too -- that my hands are literally trembling. Señor Fartybutt didn't anger me this much -- he's known for being a hateful wingnut. But Harry Browne was head of a party that is supposed to desire to protect, defend, and promote freedom. He should know better. Just read it yourself. Harry Browne and the LP can go to hell. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But Can It Be GoogleBombed? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 02:15:21 PM ----- BODY: But Can It Be GoogleBombed? Google News. My little hobby here just got a little easier. Cool. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: War Liberals Unite! Craig Schamp PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 02:36:53 PM ----- BODY: War Liberals Unite! Craig Schamp provides this link to an article in the upcoming issue of Dissent. Author Michael Walzer asks, “Can There Be a Decent Left?” It is an honest, soul-searching look by one left-liberal at why his “side” can’t accept the War on Terror – and why they should. Fascinating. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Spielberg's Head Revisited Tim Carvell PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 02:52:08 PM ----- BODY: Spielberg's Head Revisited Tim Carvell has a wonderful bit on how some of Steven Spielberg's other movies might be improved for re-release. I'm just sorry I didn't think of it first, because I would have been a lot more cruel. Well, you know this site. Anyway, it's essential reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Raised Glass Salute How did PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 03:02:15 PM ----- BODY: Raised Glass Salute How did I go this long without linking to Mike's ColdFury.com? Mike is a regular (and funny) contributor to the Drinks section here, and runs a blog just as in-your-face as this one. Maybe more so -- I don't have a picture of the Rock near my banner. I know these blogroll additions of mine always come with a "sorry I'm late" apology, but you'd understand if you saw my office. Oh, and my note-taking system, which involves a black Sharpie and a page out of whatever magazine is in front of me. Anyway, here's a belated kudo and link to Mike. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Reading Assignment Go look PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 03:16:55 PM ----- BODY: Today's Reading Assignment Go look at Kevin's Large American Penis for the best story yet on the evil RIAA, the software industry, and the futility of copy protection. UPDATE: Kevin also features what may be the world's best margarita recipe. Somebody tell Sekimori -- I have it on good authority she and hubby are planning a weekend of serious drinking. FURTHER UPDATE: I want new cheesecake, Kevin. Another brunette with a pert posterior, perhaps? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Check Is In The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 03:37:04 PM ----- BODY: The Check Is In The Mail Everyone else has probably already linked today Victor Davis Hanson, but read this graf if you haven't already: Why do Middle Easterners become excited and haughty as they gloat to you that Americans are unpopular in their countries, but suddenly grow shocked, silent, and hurt when you politely and calmly explain why the feeling is becoming — and perhaps should be — mutual? I've never been an anti-foreign aid right wing freak. But I've always beleived that it can and should be used to further our interests, not to fund those who would destroy us. At the very least, our dollars should at least buy goodwill. If you can't do us the courtesy of thinking nice thoughts about us out loud from time to time, then at least do us the courtesy of not despositing the check. Think Nana would still give you that birthday money if your response each time was to step on her toes and tell the rest of the family what a shallow, stupid, arrogant bitch she is? I've run out of goodwill for Egypt. Apparently they never had any for me. That's fine -- I just hope they understand the letter I'm about to write my Congressman. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Welcome to the Blogosphere. We PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 03:51:44 PM ----- BODY: Welcome to the Blogosphere. We Do Not Need to See Your ID Work yourself into a righteous rage with this David Harsanyi article on Cuba-lovin', blue collar worker-taxin', Cheetho-hoggin' Michael Moore in FrontPage Magazine. Harsanyi has also started a blog, but so far it's just links to his columns published elsewhere. Get to work, David! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: So Long and Thanks For PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 03:54:04 PM ----- BODY: So Long and Thanks For All the Fisk Melissa just finished her last day working for the USFSA (she need more free time to plan the wedding) and is on her way over to the VodkaCondo. If you'll excuse me, I have to go put fresh sheets on the bed and close the curtains. Enjoy the weekend, kids. I'll put up some fresh material here and there before Monday. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Can Quit Posting Whenever PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/15/2002 04:14:16 PM ----- BODY: I Can Quit Posting Whenever I Want, Really One last item, then I really am going to go have a weekend. DailyPundit links to the best Paul Krugman takedown yet. The best part? It's written by noted economist, successul investor, and genuine funnyman Ben Stein. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Endless Prattle Melissa has fallen PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/16/2002 12:15:44 AM ----- BODY: Endless Prattle Melissa has fallen asleep already, but I'm going through the usual insomnia. So just a quick word before I try again to sleep. Before I started this blog, I could tell you -- for hours on end -- exactly where I stood on any issue. Even something new I'd never considered before. You give me A, I respond immediately, eloquently (sometimes), and endlessly (always) with B. Writing every day on all those same political and moral issues I hold so dear, I find... ...No, I'm not going to wimp out and say "It's more complicated." The world is exactly as screwed up as it's ever been -- we're just going through a more violent phase is all. My thinking certainly hasn't become more complicated, because I'm no smarter than I was the day before VodkaPundit was born. I'm not going to use age as an excuse, either; crowding 33 isn't old by any means. My 85-year-old Grandfather Green is only now starting to slow down, and only a little. The difference is you. Well, those of you who send me emails and make notes in the Drinks section and get right back in my face like I get up in yours. So now instead of preaching, I have to argue. Or at least preach a little harder -- because louder just doesn't work on a blog. I'm no smarter, I'm no more eloquent, I'm perhaps arguably better read -- and that is thanks only to my sister and brother and in-between bloggers. And yet I find my positions are much more varied than I would ever have imagined. You're to blame for that, and I thank you. Keep challenging me, and I'll try to keep you entertained, annoyed, informed, offended -- whatever your reason is for coming here. And that better than a thousand of you visit each day is a fact I don't know what to do with. Thanks for letting me vent. I think maybe I can sleep now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A New Calculus The next PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/17/2002 02:23:46 PM ----- BODY: A New Calculus The next time some Idiotarian tries to tell you this is an unjust war because we've killed more Afghan civilians than New Yorkers were killed on September 11, try out a different equation on them. So long as our military casualties are lower than our civilian casualties would have been without destroying first those who would kill us, then this is certainly a just war. We're still more than 3,000 deaths ahead. Fight on! UPDATE: The confusion I've caused is due to a total ignorance of math, coupled with the writer's desire to use as few words as is economical. Let's try it with more words, rather than fewer. Our military deaths are about 35 so far. Let's call that number X. Our civilian deaths around 3,000. We'll call that number Y. Z represents the additional civilian casualties we might suffer if we don't hunt down terrorists. In other words, if we don't destroy al Qaeda and other groups, there will be more 9/11-type attacks. Possibly nuclear, biological, or chemical. So Z is that unknown number. So long as X is less than Y + Z, the anti-war bozos should shut the hell up. It's an admittedly silly formula (which was the whole point), but no sillier than theirs regarding 9/11 fatalities and Afghan civilian deaths. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Double Plus Ungood Remember that PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 04:11:03 AM ----- BODY: Double Plus Ungood Remember that April meeting between 9/11 hijacker Mohamed Atta and the Iraqi consul in Prague? You're not supposed to. And if some people get their way, very few people will remember the Iraqi connection to the WTC attacks. Safire explains the why and how. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "The proper response of any PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 04:24:50 AM ----- BODY: "The proper response of any civilized person must be cold rage" I haven't posted about the 15 dead Saudi little girls, because I just can't wrap my brain around it. The murders (I was going to say "tragedy" at first, but that's a cop out) taught me the meaning of the phrase "unspeakably evil." I find, literally, that I can't talk about it. But Bill Quick did wrap his brain around it. And he did find words. Quite a good job of it, too. Read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: There's Something About Harry Are PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 04:30:58 AM ----- BODY: There's Something About Harry Are you a Star Wars fan? Hate Jar Jar Binks? Disappointed in The Phantom Menace? Wary of Attack of the Clones? If you're the jealous type, you're going to want to attack Harry Knowles with a brick. Caution: This link leads to minor spoilers on Harry's Ain't It Cool News site. I haven't clicked, nor will I. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Won't Find This In PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 04:49:55 AM ----- BODY: You Won't Find This In the NYT Very Smart Reader Boris Kupershmidt leads the way to a fascinating Atlantic write up of Defense Department Überhawk Paul Wolfowitz. James Fallows' "conversation" with Wolfowitz is candid (as is typical of anything Wolf says), and nicely balanced. I'd say Fallows came to like his subject. The best is near the end, when Wolfowitz takes a longer look into the future, one past and away from the Current Mess: "In East Asia in general you have this stunning growth in economic power, which means ultimately, potentially, military power. A unified Korea is itself the size of a major European power. Only in Asia does Vietnam look like a small country—its army is tough and big. And then you've got the Indians ... It's a question of how to achieve balance of power in East Asia, among these growing powers, without going through the experience Europe went through to get there, because that's a little too costly." Indeed. And I sleep better knowing we have pros again working at Defense. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Capital Of the UK PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 04:59:11 AM ----- BODY: The Capital Of the UK Is Not Brussels From The Times online edition. The Iron Lady herself, Margaret Thatcher, says it's time for the UK to start to withdraw from the EU, calling it "fundamentally unreformable." The former Prime Minister says in her new book, serialised in The Times, that most of the problems the world has faced, including Nazism and Marxism, have come from mainland Europe. Enoch Powell had been right when he gave warning in the 1970s that entry to the Common Market involved an unacceptable loss of sovereignty. Ever watch British Parliament in session Sundays on C-SPAN? The Prime Minister facing every sort of hostile question on every subject imaginable, and doing so with charm and facts and wit -- and barely a notebook. It's a serious form of democracy in a format which demands high standards of its Ministers. Now imagine that raw, rare form of democracy stripped of its meaning, and replaced with unelected, unaccountable, statist, stasist, bureaucrats in Brussels. Thatcher is right. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But the Prof Would Get PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:04:05 AM ----- BODY: But the Prof Would Get Two Beers Also from today's Times comes this lovely Letter to the Editor on nuclear weapons, the Middle East, and non-proliferation. For those who are not comfortable with such terms as evil I have another definition. How about irresponsible? It is irresponsible for a country to supply arms to those who purposefully fly planes into buildings full of civilians. It is irresponsible for a country to supply arms to those who purposefully bomb civilians in pizza restaurants and café bars. It is entirely responsible for any country subjected to such attacks to use its full force to stop them. Of course I have no idea who Andrew Elishahoff is, other than the author of the letter. But if he's ever in Colorado, I'll buy him a beer. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Also Won't Attack With PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:12:13 AM ----- BODY: We Also Won't Attack With Paraplegics The Guardian (who else?) reports Tony Blair's first cabinet defection over the Current Mess. Clare Short announced her opposition to "a blind military attack on Iraq," this weekend on a BBC news program. Don't worry, Clare -- our armed forces can see quite well. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Say It With Me Now: PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:15:55 AM ----- BODY: Say It With Me Now: You Wouldn't Like Us When We're Angry By now I'm sure you've all read about our two dead citizens in that church attack in Pakistan over the weekend. Let me speak directly to the people involved in the atrocity: I'm not religious, but most of my countrymen are. So if you barbarian idiots want to really rile us up, continue on with the church attacks. That little thing we did in Afghanistan? You remember, where we toppled the government, killed thousands of barbarian terrorists, and put people friendly to us in charge? Yeah, we were holding back. Consider yourselves warned. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And Pat Buchanan Is Running PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:24:08 AM ----- BODY: And Pat Buchanan Is Running for Franco's Old Job In Spain South China Morning Post via Google News. Conservatives now run Portugal (link requires registration), after a narrow win over the Socialists in weekend elections. Now, a European Conservative is more like a DLC-style Democrat in this country -- don't think that Lisbon is being run by a Goldwater. Nevertheless, this is big news. And there are more elections set for a host of Western European nations this year. Expect to see similar results -- an anti-EU (or at least anti-something) backlash is brewing across the Continent. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Nick Denton Must Hate Mondays PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:31:18 AM ----- BODY: Nick Denton Must Hate Mondays Dr. Weevil must not have overindulged on his birthday Friday, because he spent the weekend doing some first-rate blogging. Weekend topics include the struggle for facts in matters of gun control, how to define "liberal," and a lovely bit of piling-on for the hapless Nick Kristof. Great stuff to read with your morning coffee. Screw the newspaper -- this is where the action is. PS You'll have to actually read Doc W to understand the headline above. I'm cruel like that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Role of General Burkhalter PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:41:24 AM ----- BODY: The Role of General Burkhalter Will Be Played By Pat Buchanan Sergeant Schultz doesn't know nothing, and doesn't see nothing. He sees a lot and knows a lot -- and that's all I'm going to tell you for now. Meet the newest member of Team Stryker. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Early A.M. Hand Wringing When PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:48:19 AM ----- BODY: Early A.M. Hand Wringing When a barbarian with a pistol can kill a beautiful young lady and injure 16 others on the same goddamn day our representative is negotiating peace... Look, President Bush sent Anthony Zinni to the Middle East for no reason other than to placate our "friends" in Europe and some eggheads at State. Negotiation is not possible. Hasn't been possible. Won't be possible. The only three choices left are whether to ratchet up the retaliations until the Palestinians cry uncle, let the US take over the West Bank and enforce a very tense peace, or let a new hard-right Israeli government (after Sharon's falls) invade and expel every last damn Palestinian into Jordan. The first option is iffy at best. The second option is unpalatable to us. The third option is damn near unthinkable. Anyone have a fourth? Right now, I could use a fifth. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Small Request I think PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 05:55:19 AM ----- BODY: A Small Request I think my permalinks are working again. How or why they got messed up, I have no idea. Someone want to get back to me on this one? Thanks. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 06:03:37 AM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part VII Eventually, I'm going to push the limits of my knowlege of Roman numerals. Hell, I've already demonstrated my weakness with regular math. On with the post. StrategyPage scores another great find about some really cool toys. The Air Force has noted that work on new microwave weapons has come along better than expected, and it plans to have a microwave weapon available to fit into its Unmanned Combat Air Vehicle by 2012. Current microwave weapons can generate 3,000 watts. By 2004, these should reach 15,000 watts by 2004 and 100,000 watts by 2007. A microwave weapon could be extremely useful in combat. By 2010, such weapons would be able to "kill" a main battle tank by destroying its electronics. A microwave weapon could destroy most military vehicles, missile launchers, ballistic missiles in the first seconds of flight, command posts, radar stations, and could even damage the electronics on a warship. Most interesting of all, a microwave weapon could destroy the electronics of deep bunkers by feeding power through any electrical connection to the surface, including power lines, telephone lines, water pipes, or even metal-lined air ducts. Once that much power reaches the inside of the bunker, it could easily melt radios or computers and start fires. So much for Saddam's vaunted bunkers, right? Although, frankly, I think my attack strategy of dropping a daisy cutter down the front his jockey shorts is more appealing. I take that back -- Saddam is obviously a boxer guy. But I think we can all be certain that Osama wears tighty whities. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And With a Stiff Downhill PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 06:08:32 AM ----- BODY: And With a Stiff Downhill Breeze Is it just my ISP, or is the Web moving this morning like molasses uphill in winter? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Anti Aircraft and Uncle Flak PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 06:12:28 AM ----- BODY: Anti Aircraft and Uncle Flak Russia is one of the biggest sellers of well made, hard-to-defeat, heat-seeking anti-aircraft missiles. Now they're selling the antidote, too. Who said Russians would never make good capitalists? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Mess With the Bloggers PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 06:22:57 AM ----- BODY: Don't Mess With the Bloggers Sullivan and Reynolds both out on the same day with stomach problems? Coincidence? I wonder... Are the warbloggers under biological attack? Who will be next? Postrel? Palit? Or -- heaven forbid! -- Green? Really, if my posting slacks off later today, it's because Melissa and I are off trying to select wedding bands. All I can say is, after buying her that big ass diamond last year, I'm glad the bands are (ahem) slightly cheaper. As for Glenn and Andrew -- feel better soon, guys. The blogosphere ain't the same without you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Goddamn Them Victor Davis Hanson PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 06:31:02 AM ----- BODY: Goddamn Them Victor Davis Hanson covers some familiar ground today, but with a slightly new angle. Good reading on what the Arab world (and Europe) can't say about the Israeli-Palestinian War. Here's a hint: There's not a single well-run Arab nation. Here's another hint: Europe doesn't care. Europeans likewise publicly advance this prophasis [land for peace], but in private conversation admit that within a few years of "peace" the Israeli-Palestinian relationship would return to its pre-1967 status of conflict over the very existence of Israel. Afraid of terrorism, desirous of trade, eager for steady supplies of oil, nervous over large groups of Islamic immigrants, eager to court third-world favor, and playing good cop to our bad, Europe can hardly express publicly what it privately knows to be true. And there you have it. Even the most idiotarian euroweasel knows that his vision of "peace" in the Middle East can only come through the elimination of Israel. And they're willing to sell out 5 million Israelis for cheap oil. Suddenly, the Holocaust doesn't seem such an aberration. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Quick Randian Screed Why I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 07:00:03 AM ----- BODY: Quick Randian Screed Why I like Lee Iacocca, from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Bad Tuna Sandwich." "I guess I could stay in California and enjoy life, but I think I can help them. I'm ready. President Bush says volunteer. Well, I don't want to volunteer for the Peace Corps. But I would volunteer to go back to Detroit." Real help comes from those making honest money, not from playing big shot in the jungle. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Robot Adlai Stevenson? Time PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 07:10:21 AM ----- BODY: The Robot Adlai Stevenson? Time writes up Al Gore, and his 2004 election desires. They let Gore recycle a joke from last year and call it "new," but otherwise it seems a pretty honest assessment. It's difficult to find a Democrat in Washington who doesn't say publicly that the nomination is Gore's if he wants it. But it's just as hard to find one who privately expresses any enthusiasm for the prospect. And that, I think, just about sums up the nation's view as a whole. Was anyone even really excited about Gore last time around, except as an extension of Clinton policies? The whole 2000 election rationale for Gore seemed to be "Just like Bill. But without the sleaze." 9/11 showed where a Clinton foreign policy could lead, and the stock burst showed that a sizeable chunk of the Clinton economic expansion was illusory. Add the first and subtract the latter, and all you're left with is the sleaze. And since Gore doesn't even have that, he's the Nothing Candidate. Does that get you excited about 2004? Beleive it or not, it does me -- the primary bloodletting is going to be vicious. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Still No Crap, Still No PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 07:16:20 AM ----- BODY: Still No Crap, Still No Moron Juan Gato makes an excellent prediction regarding the Zimbabwe "election" and our own county's demagogues: After reading this article with the headline "Mugabe: Democracy was the winner", I have resigned myself to the inevitable. So in the interest of getting it over with, a shiny new donkey to whomever can send me a link to the first dumb column trying to compare our election of 2000 with the Zimbabwe elections with Bush being therefore equal to Mugabe. You know it's going to happen. He's right. Stay posted to Juan's Bucket o' Rants for the winner. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Modern War Liberal I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 07:21:00 AM ----- BODY: Today's Modern War Liberal I missed it Friday, but here's Mac Thomason's heart-searching response to my dropped gauntlet last week. The DLC should listen very, very closely to what Mac has to say. No democracy can function without two strong parties -- and the Democrats are perilously close to the edge of irrelevancy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's Gotta Hurt Michael Rubin PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 07:35:24 AM ----- BODY: That's Gotta Hurt Michael Rubin performs a live dissection on "moderate" Iranian President Muhammad Khatami. Get ready to experience some righteous anger. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But We Still Don't Know PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 07:41:24 AM ----- BODY: But We Still Don't Know Why His Lips Are That Color Roger Ebert's testicles finally drop. Yesterday, he placed Patton in his pantheon of The Great Movies, while admitting that the movie isn't anti-war, but "a hard-line glorification of the military ethic." I'm not sure Ebert meant that as a compliment, but at least there's one film critic man enough to say that a military ethic and greatness can coexist in the same film. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Getting Mad Again With PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 07:55:00 AM ----- BODY: He's Getting Mad Again With a straight face, The Guardian reports Arab leaders telling Dick Cheney that "Iraq is not the priority." This, of course, comes from vicious dictators who are also in no rush to create democracy, free markets, liberal education systems, free speech, equal rights, civilized foreign relations, or the rule of law. I hope Cheney responded simply, silently, with that killer smirk of his. Here's our ally Crown Prince Abdullah speaking: This followed a television interview by Crown Prince Abdullah, the effective ruler of Saudi Arabia, who told the American network, ABC, that a military campaign against Iraq was not in anyone's interests, adding: "And I don't believe it will achieve the desired result." This from the same people who begged us in eleven years ago to protect them from the same man they now want to protect from us. Is reform possible in a people so immune to reason? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We'd Better Get to Work PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 08:10:52 AM ----- BODY: We'd Better Get to Work Steven Den Beste looks at Zimbabwe, then widens his gaze to the rest of Africa and concludes: "Africa is fucked." I was about ready to chime in with sad, wise nods of agreement, when Steven changes gears and slips over to Pakistan, Myanmar, and more. "Asia is fucked," says Den Beste. And he's right. Which really leaves just Europe and the Americas. But Latin American is mostly fucked. And Europe really quite desperately wants to get fucked. So that just leaves the US, Canada, Britain, Australia, and New Zealand. Anglosphere, anyone? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: So Which One is Jeff? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 08:18:48 AM ----- BODY: So Which One is Jeff? Thomas Sowell on Hyphenated Americans. Good reading. If American Balkanization continues, I'm going to have to label myself a German-Austrian-French-English-Welsh-Scot-Irish-Russian-Jewish American. Or maybe just "Mutt." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Media Bias Silly federal PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 08:30:21 AM ----- BODY: More Media Bias Silly federal regulations could force little Albuquerque to spend 150 million dollars it can ill afford on water treatment improvements it doesn't need. Does the LA Times headline this sad mess with "Albuquerque In Deep Water" or even "City Fights Feds"? Nope. Try: "Albuquerque Battles to Leave Arsenic in the Water." I'll leave fighting the EPA's junk science to bloggers better suited to the subject, but I think the bias in the headline is obvious. Even worse, reporter Elizabeth Shogren describes the town as a "desert metropolis." Not really apt for a city with under 750,000 people in the entire metro area. Elizabeth, the Goliath in this case is the EPA, not the "metropolis" of Albuquerque. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogrolling In Action In case PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 08:43:21 AM ----- BODY: Blogrolling In Action In case you don't visit every day because she doesn't post every day, Virginia Postrel is on a roll today. Go read her. Now. Wait, before you go -- I finally got around to putting her book The Future And Its Enemies on the night stand for my bedtime reading. Postrel is just as good as she ever was at Reason, maybe better. Give it a read. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogrolling In Action Part II PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 08:47:43 AM ----- BODY: Blogrolling In Action Part II Tim Blair has the finest, funniest post on the anti-global morons yet. It's up there with his Dance for the Killing piece. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bad Blogger, Very Bad Not PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 02:28:07 PM ----- BODY: Bad Blogger, Very Bad Not that I'm trolling for hits or anything, but I understand that just because Harry Knowles got to screen Star Wars: Episode II -- Attack of the Clones in a hotel room, doesn't mean that the new Star Wars movie is available for download on this site. It also doesn't mean that VodkaPundit will link to sites where you can download Star Wars: Episode II -- Attack of the Clones. Even TheForce.net says they don't know where to download the new Star Wars movie. As we all know, pasting key phrases into a website like "download the new Star Wars" or "I saw Star Wars with Harry Knowles" would be unethical, so I'm just being informative, not looking to score hits from Star Wars fans even more desperate than I am to download videos of the new Star Wars. Although I did read that Britney Spears gets topless in the new Star Wars. So, uh, what time does Google refresh their links? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Write Your Own Joke Department PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/18/2002 03:27:43 PM ----- BODY: Write Your Own Joke Department I have no idea what to do with news that a bunch of young English, uh, tuber hooligans ransacked a giant Mr. Potato Head. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: VodkaPundit Is Back Tell me PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 09:21:39 AM ----- BODY: VodkaPundit Is Back Tell me again why someone as stupidly wrong as Nick Kristof gets a column in the New York Times? Oh, right -- the question answers itself. Let's see what Nick is up to today as he continues to report from Yemen. Want to buy a submachine gun? What I really want is a grenade launcher mounted on one of those giant lifter things like Sigorney Weaver used to kill the momma monster at the end of Aliens, but I'll take what I can get. This little market town in the wild, wild north of Yemen has more than 50 shops selling all kinds of toys for boys. A used Uzi goes for $170, a machine pistol with silencer is $350, and a brand-new AK-47 assault rifle goes for nearly $400. Grenades are $4 each. An antitank mine is $22. A rocket-propelled grenade launcher is $500. An arms merchant I met here might even be able to find you an antiaircraft gun or a tank. No sales tax. How very wonderfully Heinleinian. Something tells me, though, that Nick isn't going to use this as a fun, upbeat example of how an armed society is a polite society. Although I bet he watched his big mouth for once. This is Yemen, where we're preparing to send American soldiers to open a new front in the war on terrorism. I admire the instinct of trying to boost security here, but the bottom line is that we're going to send our troops on a poorly defined mission into a country where they're not wanted, where grenades cost $4 each. As opposed to the tranquil pacifism of Afghanistan, where the most anyone was ever armed with was a hug? Nick, you're going to have to do a lot better than that. Afghanistan was more remote than Yemen -- and had been given arms over the last 22 years by the USSR, the US, Saudi Arabia, Pakistan, Iran, and most anyone else who came by. Oh, and in case you thought we were really stupid, let's state for the record that we know four dollars is a lot more in Yemen than it is here. I hate it when people assume we're stupid and uninformed. The plan is for the Americans to train Yemeni troops. But the Yemen government's main problem in controlling terrorism is not that soldiers are poorly trained. Instead it is that for reasons of history, culture and tribal politics, the central government doesn't entirely control the hinterlands. Congrats, Nicky. You've just successfully described every Third World nation, including some in our own hemisphere. Such as Canada. Seriously though, name one poor nation that fully controls much outside the capital city. Time's up. You lose. Americans who gripe about big government and high taxes, who believe the state that governs best governs least, would love Yemen. The central government controls the beautiful old capital, Sana, and a chunk of turf to its south and west. Beyond that is a delicate balancing act with local sheiks. Now there's the cheapest, most poorly built straw man I've seen in ages. Don't you have editors on that fancy op-ed page of yours? What you're describing is anarchy. What a small government does is enforce a few necessary laws completely, but leaves the people otherwise free to their own pursuits. Such as bad journalism. As for the rest of that last graf, it's just a restatement of fact from the previous graf, only this time with a tiny amount of local color. Again, Nick could be desrcibing most any Third World nation. Just replace "Sana" with "Kabul" and "sheiks" with "tribes." Yawn. When I wanted to come up here into northern Yemen, I took an escort from the government including, for one stretch of road, a pickup truck loaded with seven soldiers and a heavy machine gun mounted in back. But more important, to avoid kidnapping (Yemen's favorite sport) it was prudent to get invitations from the leading sheiks. "No one will pay attention to the government escort," a wise Yemeni explained to me. "But if you're invited by the sheiks, they won't dare bother you. They'll be afraid of retaliation from the sheiks." We all saw the same scene in The Godfather Part I, Nicky, when Pacino was hiding out in Sicily. We're not impressed. The frailty of the government's authority was underscored on the road north, when we were stopped at a roadblock by a group of men with assault rifles. It was Yemeni code: a stick across the road means you stop, or you get your tires shot out. It can also mean there was a bad thunderstorm the night before, which can lead to some real traffic snarls during the rainy season, as everyone stops and waits for gunmen who aren't there. Well, it would if there were any cars in Yemen's backcountry. They can't afford an old clunker Land Rover Poverty III, and we're supposed to worry about $4 grenades? It turned out that one of the men at the roadblock was owed money by a man of another tribe. So they were stopping all traffic to look for a car driven by any member of that other tribe: they planned to confiscate the car and keep it until the money was repaid. There were no police or army units to keep the road open, and the roadblock would remain until either the tribesmen got their car or the debt was paid. Damn! It's a morass! It's a quagmire! 227 years and twenty-someodd wars, our Army has never effectively learned how to deal with a roadblock. Our fuckin' useless State Department could deal with this thing, just by writing them a check. They want money, Kristof. And say what you will about America, we're even better at making money than we are at kicking ass. Vice President Dick Cheney dropped in on Yemen last week, for a useful show of support — even if it was also a show of nervousness, for Mr. Cheney spent only two hours in the country, and he switched to a military plane that took evasive maneuvers as it landed. Opposition parties, eager to profit politically, said in a statement that the visit would "lead to more bloodshed." Manly man Nick "Afraid of Girls with Guns" Kristof can stay in Yemen and visit the outskirts, but Dick Cheney is a coward. Did I read that right? I have no comment, because I have to wipe coffee off my monitor. American spooks worry that Yemen might provide a new base for terrorists like Osama bin Laden (who in a 1996 interview praised Yemen, his ancestral home, as a place in which he might settle). That's the reason for trying to bolster the government by training its army. It's a worthy goal, and if the training were conducted in the United States or in another country like Saudi Arabia it would not risk undermining the government's moral authority. So why not conduct the same training, the same technology transfers, outside of Yemen? Because those damn tricky Yemenis are all in, um, Yemen? Nick, you also might want to visit some of our higher military learning institutions, such as the Army War College, and take a look at how many foreign officers are there, and what countries they're from. I don't know that we're training Yemenis here, but I also don't know if we're not. And neither do you, thanks to sloppy reporting and slapdash conclusions. You're paid too damn well to do work this damn poor. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Be a Quitter Hawk PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 09:29:54 AM ----- BODY: Don't Be a Quitter Hawk Girl Emily Jones is quitting smoking. Em, as a quitter myself (eight months now), let me give you some advice: Don't do it. I miss that first morning smoke with a hot cup of coffee. That Camel after a big dinner, when there's still some Cabernet left in the glass. And did I mention those after-sex cigarettes? Do you know what non-smokers do after sex? We lay there and cuddle. Let me tell you, that is not all it's cracked up to be. Sure, it doesn't smell great. That's what Glade Neutralizer is for. I know it's expensive, but consider the cost just another motivation to work harder and get that promotion you've been bucking for. And yeah, it takes a horrible toll on your health. But it takes those years away at the end of your life, when most everyone is on a respirator, anyway. It's not like you suddenly lose 25-35. Now those are some fine years. So Emily, rip off that patch, march down the street to your nearest convenience store, plonk down four bucks, and get yourself a tasty pack of 20 little smoldering sticks of heaven. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Airline Security Joke For the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 09:34:08 AM ----- BODY: Airline Security Joke For the second time in two months, Heathrow Airport has been robbed of millions of dollars. Doesn't Tony Blair have someone stupid and useless he can put in charge of airports? Does Britain not have a Tom Ridge? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Got Any Other Bright Ideas? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 09:44:08 AM ----- BODY: Got Any Other Bright Ideas? OpinionJournal's Tom Bray has been smoking some seriously good stuff. Bray argues that the way for Republicans to re-take the Senate in November is to "take on the imperial judiciary." He makes some excellent points on court activism, and why we need better judges -- and a Senate who will approve the President's nominees. But as a national election issue? I can hear you snoring already. The only people who get riled up about the courts or court nominees are diehard lefties and righties -- people who always turn out for midterm elections. The way to win lots of midterms is to get regular, nonpolitical people (about 60% of the elctorate) excited enough about something to get off the sofa and into a polling booth. That's how Newt took control of Congress in '94. He "nationalized" the election using the Contract With America -- just enough to increase Republican turnout. And let me tell you, court appointments are not going to get people away from Frasier. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Stop Me If You Think PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 09:49:42 AM ----- BODY: Stop Me If You Think You've Heard This One Before India and Pakistan are playing an old Cold War favorite -- tit for tat expulsions of each others' diplomats. But just like during the Cold War, this little dance will replace war, rather than lead to war. Search Suman Palit's archives for why they won't fight. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Pro-Choice, Too Nat Henthoff, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 09:55:45 AM ----- BODY: He's Pro-Choice, Too Nat Henthoff, a true champion of the First Amendment, can be counted on to speak his very sharp mind on judicial nominees. And you know what? He doesn't believe in litmus tests, not even on the Bill of Rights. President Abraham Lincoln, speaking of the essential independence of the judiciary, said of any nominee before the Senate: "We cannot ask what he will do, and if we should, and he would answer us, we should despise him for it." Read his latest column -- and read what no one else will tell you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And the Blog Rolls On PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 10:02:20 AM ----- BODY: And the Blog Rolls On Andrea Harris vents her spleen at Saudi Arabia's Arab News -- and the results are fun, funny, and only somtimes bitter. I think the Saudis should keep in mind that this country was founded on kicking inbred royal ass. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Can Always Meet With PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 10:08:39 AM ----- BODY: He Can Always Meet With His Money In Switzerland Israel PM Ariel Sharon is now openly talking of exiling Yassar Arafat from the Palestinian territories. Ha'aretz reports on Dick Cheney's visit to the Middle East, and his own refusal to meet with the Palestinian Authority chief. So Arafat can't get any Westerners to meet with him. But if he goes to the Arab League conference later this month to meet with his own people, he may never get to come back home. That's no solution to the Israeli-Palestinian War -- but that doesn't make it any less cool. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Think You're Mad Now? Andrea PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 10:22:15 AM ----- BODY: Think You're Mad Now? Andrea Harris got me wondering just how bad is Saudi Arabia's government-run Arab News? Have link, will travel. Here are just a few samples of what our allies publish in English. First, we have an editorial cartoon. It shows Cheney and Sharon about to shake hands, each saying "Peace Upon You." Except the words in the balloon are over the picture of many (presumably Palestinian) skulls. Ha ha, those laugh riot Saudi cartoonists. They're almost as funny as Señor Fartybutt. Next up is an editorial with this lede: "By reviewing the history of Israel’s policy, we can see one consistent principle aimed at achieving the ultimate goal of all Israeli leaders: “Greater Israel” from the Nile to the Euphrates." You got that right -- the official Saudi organ (feel free to giggle) tells millions of Egyptians, Jordanians, Syrians, and Iraqis that little Israel is going to ethnic cleanse them all. Um, just as soon as they're done murdering every last Palestinian. Last, let's look at this story on school safety. It is not that only girls’ schools are housed in rented buildings — this is a serious problem with the boys’ schools as well. There are approximately 200 rented schools for boys in the Jeddah region run by Ministry of Education (MOE), most of which also lack basic safety equipment, according to Saeed Ba-Hubail, director of projects and maintenance at the MOE. Yeah, forget the 15 girls who were murdered by the Skirt Police -- those boys schools really need our attention right away. Anyway, you get the idea. And remember, this is what they publish for our consumption. The stuff they print in Arabic is far, far worse. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's the Same Old Song PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 10:56:13 AM ----- BODY: It's the Same Old Song Martin Devon, the Patio Pundit, says we should tackle Iran before we go after Iraq. I know Martin is new to the game, but where have I heard that one before? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Even Still Listens To PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:03:08 AM ----- BODY: He Even Still Listens To The Smiths Tim, I know I'm out of date. The last time I was even close to hip was 1984 -- and I was a mere lad too young to drive (but old enough to steal the Nissan wagon once or twice). ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Keep Those Blogs a' Rollin' PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:06:32 AM ----- BODY: Keep Those Blogs a' Rollin' More Than Zero Sum has two of the finest, funniest, sharpest posts you'll see all day. First, there's the Osama/Hollywood connection. Then, a Lileks-worthy rip of our favorite whipping boys at The Guardian. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He's Gloating Again Kevin Hassett PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:14:08 AM ----- BODY: He's Gloating Again Kevin Hassett at Tech Central Station says we're not only out of recession, but that he expects strong growth this year. He has the typical "On the other hand..." statements that you always get from economists, but his reasoning is strong and even features a pretty chart. Anyway, I'm telling you all this just because it's further proof of what you read right here on VodkaPundit two weeks ago: "O'Neil predicts 3-3.5% growth for 2002, but I'd bet a little higher. 3.5-4.0%." Yes, I will keep reminding you of each and every time I'm right. 'Cause you guys always remind me of when I'm wrong. Fair's fair! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'll Be Upstairs Counting the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:22:38 AM ----- BODY: I'll Be Upstairs Counting the Gray Ones Now this makes me feel old. Remember those fun, silly little handheld electronic sports games that Coleco made way back when? They had football and baseball and a couple others, too, I think. Just a few buttons and some red LED blips and tinny noises. Well, they're being re-released. On their 25th anniversary. Ouch. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Yes, Melissa Knows Already My PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:32:50 AM ----- BODY: Yes, Melissa Knows Already My secret crush, Virginia Postrel, saves me the effort by taking on Leon Kass herself -- and doing a far better job of slow-motion castration than I ever could. Virginia doesn't have permalinks to her posts, so hurry on over there before that link is dated. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Pretty Far Our For a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:40:50 AM ----- BODY: Pretty Far Our For a Conservative I missed Mark Steyn's new column yesterday, so, uh, here it is today. Instead of going after the usual suspects in the Canadian government or Riyadh, Mark aims his big guns at an even slower-moving target: Liza Minelli. Trust me, you want to read this, if only for the clincher: New York will forget Liza's latest wedding soon enough, so will Liza. But we should remember to savour this ersatz Royal wedding precisely because it's ersatz; and those who defend America needn't do it despite its "celebrity culture" but because of it. Better a fan than a vassal. Also, Steyn has some truly trippy stuff about Shirley Temple and Michael Jackson. It's like a celebrity column written by PJ O'Rourke when he was still doing truly felonious amounts of drugs. Required reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Assignment Captain Ron Howard PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:48:48 AM ----- BODY: Today's Assignment Captain Ron Howard is the commanding officer of the aircraft carrier USS John F. Kennedy. StrategyPage has the announcement he gave his 6,000-man crew before the start of hostilities over Afghanistan. I'll quote you one graf, but you really owe it to yourself to read the whole thing. They hate us and attack us because they oppose all that is good about America. They hate us because we are prosperous. They hate us because we are tolerant. They hate us because we are happy. Mostly, they hate us because we are free and because we will "pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend or oppose any foe to assure the survival and success of liberty." Make no mistake - this is fight for Western Civilization. If these monsters are not destroyed they will destroy us, and our children and children's children will live in fear forever. Capt. Howard is the man some in our country would call "baby killer." Remember that as you read his words. UPDATE: From the Dirty Little Secrets section of StrategyPage comes word of how warm spring weather will help us root even more al Qaeda out of Afghanistan. And it's not what you think. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's VodkaPundit's Nice Way of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 11:59:33 AM ----- BODY: It's VodkaPundit's Nice Way of Saying "Fuck You" One more shot from StrategyPage, then I'll move on to something that interests someone other than just me. Stephen Cole performs an excellent analysis of Afghan civilian war deaths, and comes up with a realistic assessment of 700-1,300 killed. That's 1,500 to 1,900 hundred fewer civilians than were killed on purpose in the 9/11 attacks -- and 700-1,300 more than the United States wanted to kill at all. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The War Monger With a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 12:10:33 PM ----- BODY: The War Monger With a Heart Mac Thomason reads that the US will seek the death penalty against Zacarias Moussaoui, and asks: Question: If you seek martyrdom by flying a plane into a building, but you're too incompetent to do it, and later wind up getting caught, and they put you to death, do you still get the 72 virgins? No, Mac. In that case, I think you become one of the 72 virgins. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: There's Just Something In My PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 12:17:33 PM ----- BODY: There's Just Something In My Eye, I Swear Maybe this link is old news -- but it's new to me. A touching tribute to Old Glory, and a great find by the VodkaFiancée. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Best New Guy Award Goes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 02:27:26 PM ----- BODY: Best New Guy Award Goes To Juan Gato – Again While I was still asleep, Juan was busy taking a hard look at Nick Kristof – and came away with an observation that both the Instantman and I missed completely: “Nicholas Kristof is first and foremost a bigot.” Read Kristof’s column, check out my “analysis,” see what the Prof had to say – then read Juan Gato. We have a winner. UPDATE: I think I have it all fixed now. I was about to write a very nasty line about Ev, but I'll save it for when I'm off Blogger and on Movable Type. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Raised Glass Salute John Braue PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/19/2002 05:28:09 PM ----- BODY: Raised Glass Salute John Braue takes on the Professor -- and wins. Earlier today, Glenn linked to this Slate piece by Anne Applebaum, and argued that Europe uses hypocritical multiculturalism to keep immigrants in their ghettos. John disagrees: It's not contempt, it's outright racism. Europe is the home of the Tribal State; if you are not a member of the Tribe, you can never be a member of Tribe, not even if you are a tenth-generation immigrant. You are at best a Gastarbeiter, to be given the scut work to do so that the Volk can collect their government benefits in peace; at worse, a nuisance to be run out of town if, inexplicably, one of the Volk wants your job instead of jusr cashing his monthly check as an "occupational reservist". The rest of John's post is just as good, and worth your time. So is his site -- The Rat's Nest. And if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go grab a bite to eat and one or two too many beers with my future brother-in-law. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Excuses Excuses So my brother-in-law-to-be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/20/2002 07:43:23 AM ----- BODY: Excuses Excuses So my brother-in-law-to-be Rick and I head out for steak and beers last night, and decide to pick up the girls (my Melissa and his Lisa) after they get off work. The four of us end up at a great little Irish dive on Garden of the Gods -- and closed the place. My head is not pounding. The entire condo is. We may be a leetle slow this morning, so bear with us. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This lede from Reuters (Motto: PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/20/2002 07:51:32 AM ----- BODY: This lede from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Pounding Hangover"): Paris has warned Washington it could review its cooperation with the Sept. 11 probe if the United States sought the death penalty against a French national charged with aiding the people behind the attacks. [Emphasis added by me] Warned, eh? Then come and get him. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It Ain't Never Gonna Be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/20/2002 07:58:48 AM ----- BODY: It Ain't Never Gonna Be Pretty Tom Friedman says we need troops permanently stationed, NATO-style, in Afghanistan and Israel. I don't agree with all his reasons, especially the left-liberal claptrap about creating "legitimacy" for actions against Iraq, but on this one, Friedman is right. With Iraq, Saddam's broken ceasefire agreement is all we need to invade. All the other reasons (WMD work, complicity in 9/11, etc) are just gravy. But if we want to keep some semblance of order in Afghanistan, and if we want Israel to feel safe enough to give up its settlements and occupation in the West Bank, then we're going to have to station troops in both countries. For a very, very long time. Friedman said you had to be sitting down to hear the news. I just say deal with it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also, It's the First Perfect PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/20/2002 02:19:12 PM ----- BODY: Also, It's the First Perfect Day of Spring Pardon the lack of posts -- the TV repair guy is here, but can't seem to duplicate the picture loss. But here's a little something to tide you over for a bit. Boris Kupershmidt sent me the following article by Bob Lonsberry. I don't know who Bob is, and it isn't posted at any known URL, so I'm just going to post it in its entirety. Enjoy, if that's the right word. A LESSON ON HOW TO TREAT WAR PRISONERS Apparently, when the big Chinook kicked off, the SEAL fell out. A 32-year-old guy named Neil Roberts. A petty officer first class, one of the toughest in the American armed forces, in the back of a big twin-rotor helicopter that was taking fire. And he went out the side. Nobody's exactly sure how. But there's a lot of movement and a lot of wind and a lot of gravity. And when they got close to base and did the head count they were one shy. That's Afghanistan. Which is a long way from Cuba. Where a hundred and more captured Al Qaeda prisoners sit in cells waiting for lunch. A good Muslim lunch designed to incorporate their traditional foods and to be respectful of Islam's dietary guidelines. Just like breakfast and supper. They eat good there, and most of them have put on weight. And most of them have been through the camp infirmary, a fully functioning Army field hospital where they receive the same medical care offered members of the American military. In fact, in addition to treating any injuries sustained in their capture, American specialists have also treated orthopedic and cosmetic injuries sustained in battle months and years ago. Al Qaeda detainees at Guantanamo Bay have received the best of American medical and dental care--for free--being given procedures and treatment simply unavailable in their native lands. And they've been given a Muslim chaplain, flown in especially for them, and copies of the Koran, and a big sign points the direction to pray toward Mecca and the five-times-a-day Islamic call to prayer is played on the camp loudspeaker. That's what's happening in Cuba. And yet, activists and officials from around the world have publicly condemned American treatment of the Al Qaeda men captured in combat. Muslim governments, our European allies, American leftist groups and Amnesty International-types have all bitterly accused the United States of being inhumane. Some have claimed there should be a United Nations condemnation, many have called for international inspectors to go in. The call has been loud, almost deafening, as the world has condemned and cursed the way Al Qaeda fighters have been treated in captivity by Americans. That's in Cuba. Which is a long way from Afghanistan. Where one of those Prowler unmanned surveillance planes saw Petty Officer Roberts come out of the helicopter, and lie there injured but alive and conscious. The bigwigs saw this, live, back at headquarters. And they also saw the three Al Qaeda guys come out of the bush and grab him. He was their prisoner. Captured in battle. And they grabbed him and dragged him and took him away. And then, it seems, they beat him, cut his throat. And executed him. They shot him too. A wounded man. A detainee. No medical care, no food, no holy book, no chaplain. Just a bullet. Which has produced silence on the part of the world's activists. Not one word. Apparently it's OK to shoot a wounded prisoner, but if you take him to a hospital and treat his injuries and feed him, you've gone too far. Apparently killing an American detainee is acceptable, while coddling an Al Qaeda detainee is not. The same people who have seen a war crime in the treatment of terrorists are unperturbed by the slaughter of a prisoner of war. We treat them with caring and compassion, and we get cursed. They treat us with barbarism and butchery, and they get blessed. And that's not right. Critics of the American detention of Al Qaeda terrorists in Cuba aren't concerned about those terrorists, and they don't give two hoots about human rights. What they want to do is attack America, any way they can. The great many people who hate the American people and culture have rallied to the defense of the Cuba detainees. And had nary a word of criticism for the pigs who executed Neil Roberts in cold blood. This war is about good versus evil -- no matter what you hear. The forces of light are tackling the forces of darkness. Civilization is taming savagery. And Neil Roberts gave his life in that cause. And, fortunately for them, the Al Qaeda detainees in Cuba were captured by men instead of beasts. (c) by Bob Lonsberry 2002 ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Springtime for VodkaPundit It's not PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/20/2002 10:46:56 PM ----- BODY: Springtime for VodkaPundit It's not often that the first perfect day of spring is also the literal first day of spring. So I took the top down, wasted a lot of gas, and just enjoyed the sunshine. Sorry if my spring fever got in the way of the site -- but a man needs priorities. Back to regular stuff Thursday. Really. I'm even working on tomorrow morning's stuff right now. Besides, the weather is supposed to be kinda cruddy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Don’t Need To Be PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:01:23 AM ----- BODY: You Don’t Need To Be Sitting For This Hang in there, kids – it could be a desperate blogging day. OpinionJournal has nothing but yet another screed against idiot budget-bloat at the IMF, an old news rehash of Bush’s steel tariffs cop out, and something for (yawn) stamp collectors. Even The New York Times fails to anger, much less (natch) inform. Hell, I can’t even get excited about anything in the Guardian right now. It must be spring fever. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Demopublican? Republicrat? Idiotarian? Steel tariffs, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:10:07 AM ----- BODY: Demopublican? Republicrat? Idiotarian? Steel tariffs, failure to stand up for court nominees, and now President Bush says he’ll sign campaign finance “reform” into law. Please, someone remind me why I voted Republican in 2000. NOTE: The link goes to a Reuters story. Their corporate motto reads: “One Man’s Wire Service Is Another Man’s Ruptured Kidney.” And you thought I was going to forget to include one of my favorite running jokes. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Why Didn’t Someone Just Call PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:18:50 AM ----- BODY: Why Didn’t Someone Just Call the Better Business Bureau? From Ananova via Google: “Arthur Anderson pleads innocent to obstruction charges.” In a statement read before the court, managing partner Gene Frauenheim said, “There was no obstruction, the obstruction was done by somebody else, they made us obstruct against our will, we were framed by the real obstructers, the dog ate our homework, and please show mercy on us because we’re broke.” ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Put the “Blah” in PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:23:13 AM ----- BODY: We Put the “Blah” in “Blasé” Will someone please lend me an opinion on Bush’s new rules for military tribunals? I’d like to be able to at least pretend to care. Bill Safire turned in the usual 700 words on the subject, but he’s been pretty damn lazy the last few weeks – I couldn’t finish the column, not even to steal something clever. Does anyone outside the Beltway care? I know the prisoners at Camp X-Ray are unconcerned – they still think we’re pussies for not just shooting them outright. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Be All That You Can…Hey, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:26:13 AM ----- BODY: Be All That You Can…Hey, Where Did Everyone Go? Today’s Washington Times reports that our military might be spread too thin. Kids, 40% of the Air Force that performed so brilliantly in Desert Storm no longer exists. Our regular Army is pared down to ten divisions, one of which is stuck (for approximately ever) in the Balkans, and another one can’t exactly leave South Korea any time soon. Our Navy has enough ships to deal with any traditional threats, but unconventional ones could still be a problem. Worse, Navy fighters, bombers, and jammer planes are aging far faster than they’re being replaced. I wish I was on record somewhere (other than my poor friends abused eardrums) with my warnings from ten years ago about cutting down too far. On the other hand, I-told-you-so’s aren’t actually all that much fun. NOTE: The other headline I considered using was, “An Army of One. Really.” ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In The Guardian We’re PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:28:03 AM ----- BODY: Only In The Guardian We’re starting a new department, called “Only In The Guardian.” Each night before I head to sleep, you should rest well knowing that the VodkaPundit is busy searching for some bit of fun or outrage in the next day’s edition of the Guardian, just for you. I can’t promise there will always be results, but I do promise to look every weeknight. In Thursday’s edition, in what (I think) is supposed to be a straight news analysis on and interview with Muammar Gadafy (also spelled “Khadaffi,” “Kotankhandi,” and “Gahda’mitey”) Mohamed Heikel writes the following: We were sitting in the immense tent erected on the lawn in front of his former house, which was bombed by US aircraft in 1984. The house remains as the missiles left it. The missiles also killed a seven-year-old girl whom Gadafy had adopted, and raised as though she were his own daughter. When he speaks of her, his eyes betray a profound sorrow. The second graf used words like “sage” and “sedate” to describe Mr. Line al Death. It’s all really quite funny, in a way you’ll find (drum roll, please) only in the Guardian. I’d like to go into more detail on the story, but it feels unseemly for a family blog to describe a journalist blowing a, um, head of state. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It’s Not a Bird, It’s PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:31:56 AM ----- BODY: It’s Not a Bird, It’s Not a Plane, We’re Not Sure What It Is I’d like to say that Blogosphere Poet Laureate Will Warren has done it again, only I’m not at all certain what it is he’s done. I know this much – Will has written a beautiful poetry takedown of California Governor Davis Gray (or Gray Davis – I can never remember). Only I’m not sure it’s a poem. Or it is a poem, but it was assembled, rather than written, by Will from spoken-word performance art by Gray Davis (or Davis Gray). So, yeah, Will has gone and invented a new art form. Since there’s no word for it, I’m calling it a “poetry-type, trageo-comedic political send-up of a public figure using his own words.” Graceful phrasing, no? Well, that’s why we leave the poetry to Will. Whatever it is that Mr. Warren has created in his Frankenstein lab, I do know that you absolutely must read it. Yet another gem. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Is That a Nuke In PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:33:05 AM ----- BODY: Is That a Nuke In Your Pocket Or Are You Just Mad To See Me? I once called Britain "the Mother Country" in a piece from the early days of this blog that I’m still proud of. But yesterday, I discovered something else Britain has that it passed on to us -- a big ol' pair o' brass ones. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bad Business Redux I’m sure PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:34:10 AM ----- BODY: Bad Business Redux I’m sure you’ve read already that HP shareholders approved the company’s buyout of rival PC-maker Compaq. Two weeks ago, this site predicted two things: A) “The deal will probably go through.” B) “All this merger will do is let a single company fall further, rather than two companies stumble around.” So far, it’s the advantage to VodkaPundit. Time will tell if I’m right on the second prediction. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Idiots Annan-ymous George Fletcher argues PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 12:34:47 AM ----- BODY: Idiots Annan-ymous George Fletcher argues – correctly – that UN Idiot General Kofi Annan blundered bigtime when he called Israeli occupation of Arab lands “illegal.” The worst, of course, is the implicit provocation to more violence. Annan’s words did nothing but give the Palestinians yet another false grievance, when what they really need is to abandon their self-loathing and self-pity, give up barbarism, and embrace civil society. History always produces winners and losers. Yet even without Israeli occupation, Palestine would be no bigger a winner than Syria or Libya – almost entirely due to self-inflicted wounds. They need to be told that brutal truth, so that they might give up worse brutalities. But Kofi Annan, a man charged with preserving peace, has instead given license to continued war against women and children. Damn him. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Separated at Birth? As this PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 01:03:08 AM ----- BODY: Separated at Birth? As this site continues its long, slow slide (climb?) into more (mere?) satire and irrelevance, Dan & Steve at Happy Fun Pundit keep churning out longer, harder posts. I'm not jealous of their increasing, ah, size. I'm trying to compliment them for taking a funny, funny blog, and elevating it into something even better -- yet still as funny. Great work, guys. Now is there an operation or a pump or something I can use? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: When All Else Fails, Lower PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 02:18:02 PM ----- BODY: When All Else Fails, Lower Your Standards George Will, who talks electoral politics better than even Mort Kondracke or Bob Novak, has an interesting way for Republicans to finally score some gains in California: Change the rules. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Abandon Hope, All Ye Who PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 02:36:32 PM ----- BODY: Abandon Hope, All Ye Who Vote Here Until ten years ago, South Africa was the nutty home of apartheid, the only democratically government in the world where a tiny white minority kept a huge black majority in chains. Then Nelson Mandela became president, and South Africa was on its way to becoming the only decent nation in all of sub-Sarahan Africa. Now Thabo Mbeki runs the joint, and South Africa is well on its way to becoming just another African basket case. If you thought Mbeki was nuts for claiming HIV doesn't cause AIDS, wait until you hear what his ANC party said earlier today: The Zimbabwean Government's decision to charge opposition leader Mr Morgan Tsvangirai with treason is part of a painful "process of healing", South Africa's ruling African National Congress declared yesterday. There you have it, kids. One brutal, insane dictator stroking another. Don't bother telling me that Mbeki can't be a dictator because he was freely elected -- so was ÜberBoer Pieter Botha. Tsvangirai's "treason" was to run for President of Zimbabwe against brutal, insane dictator Robert Mugabe. Imagine if Republican Shock Troops (AKA The Buchanan Brigade) were slaughtering blacks at the polls in Florida, and beating elderly Jews back into their Cadillacs before they could vote. Then imagine if, having stolen the election, Bush had Gore arrested on false charges -- and soon to be shot for imaginary crimes. Democrats don't like the results of 2000, or how those results came about. Fine. But Al Gore is free to run wild and grow hair in new places, and no one has yet to even try to shut up his useless wife, Tipper. We have no concentration camps, no one is slaughtering granola store owners and giving their stores to Kiwanis members. What we have here is imperfect, messy, boisterous, and sometimes slightly shady. Be thankful for small favors. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Get Letters Very Smart PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 03:13:50 PM ----- BODY: We Get Letters Very Smart Reader Lauren Coats writes in with this: The fate of Neil Roberts has (along with other outrages) done something I never expected to see - driven a stake through the heart of internationalism in this country. UN relief workers sexually exploiting young girls, "allies" whining because we don't respect them any more, UN "peacekeepers" helplessly watching the slaughter of thousands - it's just too much. We finally realize that we can rely on nobody except, possibly, Britain. Our way of life, if not our existence, is threatened from within and without, and we're not going down easily. We'd like to be friends, whoever the country, but, if worst comes to worst, you too can become radioactive glass. What Lauren has done is to perfectly synthesize the New Seriousness with the site's blatant disregard for the norms of polite punditry. Say it out loud with me, right there at your desk: "You too can become radioactive glass." Welcome aboard, Lauren. Hope you'll also feel at home adding your comments to the "Drinks" section below each post. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Let's Make Fun Of the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 03:29:15 PM ----- BODY: Let's Make Fun Of the Pros! Why I don't read -- or link -- NRO's The Corner. Ramesh Ponnuru writes, "It’s also true that Republicans would have a larger majority if fewer people were socially liberal." Two punchlines for that one, but only because Ramesh was Extra Special Stupid. 1) "We'd win a lot more elections if people only agreed with us." 2) "Damn elections. They're just a big popularity contest." Feel free to add your own in the Drinks. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Like Closing Your Fingers PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 04:04:36 PM ----- BODY: It's Like Closing Your Fingers In a Door, Only More Stupid Earlier today I begged you kids to tell me why I bothered to vote Republican when Bush has turned out to be even further to the left than Democratic Majority Spinner John McCain. Today, Will Wilkinson asks us why we bother to vote at all. It's a valid question, and I have a couple answers. First, while there are usually no candidates worth voting for, there is almost always a ballot initiative or measure very much worth voting against. Stealth tax hikes, city council pay increases, shoddy bond measures, etc. Secondly, I never miss an opportunity to vote "no" on keeping any and all judges. Look, judges almost never lose their jobs, unless they pull a total Rose Bird and the voters do everything but provide the tar and feathers. Therefore, voting no to keep a good judge won't make them lose their post, but it might just make a bad judge think that people are paying attention. Sorry, Will -- voting is no more an endorsement of government coercion than filling out your 1040. Sure it's icky, but you can always wash your hands afterwards. I always do. NOTE: This site promises from now on to avoid using technical political-philosophical words like "icky." We apologize for any confusion we might have caused political novices, new readers, the home-schooled, some guy named Larry, and His Pontificense Pope Innocent III. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's On MSNBC, But Don't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 04:13:15 PM ----- BODY: It's On MSNBC, But Don't Let That Stop You Howard Fineman has an interesting write up of how Bush II uses personal diplomacy in much the same way as Bush I. And perhaps to greater effect. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: But It Made My Monitor PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 04:19:08 PM ----- BODY: But It Made My Monitor Go Dark and My Keyboard Get Hairy MSN has a piece arguing that not only is it OK to Google yourself, it can even be a good thing. And they don't care if the Church thinks it's a sin. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'm Fact-Checking Someone's Ass Hummina PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 04:20:12 PM ----- BODY: I'm Fact-Checking Someone's Ass Hummina hummina. NON-SEXIST PIG UPDATE: Kevin's site also features witty commentary, daily news briefs, and. . .and ohmygod did you see the caboose on that one? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Next Stop: Public Financing So PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 04:43:20 PM ----- BODY: Next Stop: Public Financing So much for getting anywhere in the courts against the illegal aspects of the new CFR law -- hapless Ken Starr will be leading the team against it. Somewhere, Bill Clinton is laughing. And Thomas Jefferson is spinning in his grave. OK, it's not that bad, not really. But the whole sordid mess just has me out of sorts. I think I'll go back to looking at cheesecake over at Kevin's. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: New Sheriff In Town? There's PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 06:08:04 PM ----- BODY: New Sheriff In Town? There's a new David Warren essay up, and that's all you really need to know before reading it. But I'm going to go ahead and quote a passage or two at you, just because it's a slow news day. A fundamental shift has just occured in the relations between Israel and the Palestinian Authority. Dick Cheney has taken over from Ariel Sharon as Yasser Arafat's gaoler (or more precisely, probation officer). The Palestinians who thought they were fighting the Israelis, now find themselves staring directly at the United States. That's an angle I haven't seen anywhere else, and Cheney is too cagey to advertise. But you'd better beleive that Arafat is wise enough to notice. And if this in indeed the case, then Bush's "going wobbly" on Israel might just be something quite clever. Democrats keep losing elections to Bush, always after seriously, uh, misunderestimating him. It could very well be his political supporters are now doing the same. I've suspended judgement on WobblyWatch so far, and I'm going to continue to do so for a bit. That's the only safe way to play this game. Now two longer grafs to give you Warren's full picture: This is the meaning of the invitation the U.S. vice president extended to Mr. Arafat to meet him in Cairo, Monday, before the Arab League Summit in Beirut (on Wednesday and Thursday, next week). The invitation is conditional. Gen. Zinni must first report that Mr. Arafat is making a "100% effort" to stop terrorist attacks on Israel. As ever, Mr. Arafat thinks he will be the last to blink. He wants to see if Mr. Cheney will meet him, even after he has privately ordered his militias to continue with the carnage. Gen. Zinni, anticipating that, is now telling him it is an extremely stupid idea. But Mr. Arafat has a genius for this kind of stupidity, has found it is consistently rewarded, and why stop now? Because he is no longer dealing with Israel, or Mr. Sharon. He is instead staring down a U.S. administration that is about to decide whether it can live with him any more, and frankly doubts that it can. Mr. Cheney had, according to my information, actually told several Arab leaders during his regional tour that he would be personally taking over Mr. Arafat's file. The news was intended to reach Mr. Arafat from them, first. This could be a very big shift, indeed. Tectonic scale. We'll see what happens at the summit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Some People Really Will Kill PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/21/2002 06:13:37 PM ----- BODY: Some People Really Will Kill For a Little Head I don't know who JH is, but he/she/it runs a fine new blog. "I Can Blog" has the link to that gruesome photo Drudge had up briefly today, of the bodiless head of the latest barbarian suicide bomber. But enough about the photo, you'll want to give JH some of your reading time. Check it out. NOTE: I apologize wholeheartedly for the headline, but the situation in Israel has gotten so woefully awful that I'm joking in self-defense. No laughter is necessary or expected. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: My Hit Counter Thanks You, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 12:28:12 AM ----- BODY: My Hit Counter Thanks You, Too James Lileks produces perhaps his finest bleat ever today. OK, so I exaggerate. Poor guy got slammed with what sounds like an especially nasty cold, but he still took the time to write some truly kind words about Sarge, Ken, and yours truly. I was especially flattered by the phrase "mordant wit." From a man who can write like Lileks, that means a lot. Now let's hope James, his lovely wife, and Gnat get over that damn cold soon. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In the Guardian I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 12:37:59 AM ----- BODY: Only In the Guardian I told you I was going to make this a daily feature. You ask, I deliver. In a story covering yesterday's barbarian suicide bombing in Jerusalem, Suzanne Goldenberg writes: Although Mr Arafat convened a rare press conference in Ramallah to condemn the attack, Mr Sharon cancelled scheduled ceasefire talks between Israeli, US and Palestinian security officials, and summoned his security cabinet last night. Such sessions are the usual prelude to Israeli military retaliation, but Mr Sharon was also scheduled to meet the US envoy, General Anthony Zinni, which could influence Israel's response. Yes, yes. Mr. Arafat held a press conference after one of his own boys brutally murdered three people and injured scores more, yet those nasty Israelis are still considering military action. Don't they get it? Arafat held a press conference. That makes it all better. Now go line up quietly for the ovens like good little Jews. The bomber struck outside a toy shop on King George Street, an area of Jerusalem that has been targeted so relentlessly by bombers that several witnesses spotted the grim-faced young man in a heavy winter coat, who was suspiciously bulky around the waist, where he had strapped the deadly nail-studded device. Re-read that last paragraph. Really, go back and read it again. The bomber strapped C-4 and nails around his body, then hung out at a toy store. A toy store. Can you picture him, trying to look casual in his last minutes of life, waiting for the bloodiest possible moment, for the greatest number of children to be near, before pushing the plunger? And yet... Yesterday's attack was critically timed, and strikes at a key element of the Bush administration's vision for the Middle East, which sees a ceasefire between Israel and the Palestinians as a precondition to staving off opposition from Arab states for a future military strike on Iraq. And yet the worst of it is, that silly bomber had the poor timing to ruin the useless peace conference that the EUnichs want. Imagine the gall. Oh, wait -- you don't have to. You just read all about gall, only in the Guardian. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Needed a Smoke After PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 12:44:14 AM ----- BODY: I Needed a Smoke After That One It's Friday, kids, and you know what that means -- Krauthammer! The Hammer gives us a short history of the post-modern anti-war movement, and finds it sputtering. Literally. So where is the left left? Sputtering, as with this from Robert Kuttner, editor of the American Prospect, writing in the Boston Globe: "Whether it is an ill-specified axis of evil, or a decision to make tactical nuclear war thinkable, or a domestic 'shadow government,' or deliberately leaked plans to attack Iraq, George W. Bush in his own way is as frightening as al Qaeda. . . . Terrorism, unfortunately, is all too real. But so is one's terror of the Bush presidency." Yeah, right. W flew Air Force Reserve jets for a few years, but never once flew one into an office tower. So by default, I have to choose him over Osama. Anyway, Krauthammer says it better than I do, so go read the whole thing. You'll thank me after. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Thank Kristof It's Friday This PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 01:21:47 AM ----- BODY: Thank Kristof It's Friday This is a long post, but it's light and airy and reads well and will iron your shirts for you while you sleep. If you want the lighter fare, scroll down. If you want to have some good laughs at the expense of a well-paid pundit, keep reading. First, it was Chicks With Guns. Then it was homoerotic Swarthy Foreign Hotties With Guns. And then we got Swarthy Foreign Hotties With Guns and Cheap Hand Grenades. Can Nicolas Kristof do it? Can he do the pundimpossible and capture the four-peat of unbelievable paid stupidity? Sports fans, let's take a look at Kristof's latest report from Yemen and find out. At a roadside stand I picked up some cassette tapes of speeches by radical Muslim leaders. Looking for writing tips? Another declares: "Muslims must not follow the Christians and Jews. Anyone who follows them becomes one of them, and God says he will not accept anyone but Muslims." Well, they say pretty much the same thing at Baptist and Catholic services, right? Then there's a tape of radical songs, including: "I'll make jihad against the pigs" — meaning Jews. At least they weren't singing "I Write The Songs." So what should be done about the militant Islamists who spew this kind of hate speech? That is, I think, one of the crucial questions for the Arab world — and for countries like ours that both despise the militants and cherish liberty. Nick, we haven't tried to shut you up, and, believe me, you're a bigger annoyance than they are. For now, under American pressure, many Muslim countries are forcibly cracking down on radical fundamentalists. Unfortunately, the result is less freedom and democracy — and in some cases, more credibility for the Islamists, who come to be seen as authentic voices of opposition to cruel and corrupt regimes. Whooooooa Nellie! Supreme Idiocy Alert. Yemen used to crack down on people who quietly asked if maybe someday they might be able to vote in an election that isn't too terribly rigged. Now Yemen cracks down on people who want to blow up your wife. And Kristof is concerned that things have gotten worse. He couldn't really mean that, could he? "Arab regimes are using the excuse of fighting terrorism to further limit the small margin of democracy in these countries," a Yemeni warned me, prudently asking that his name not be used. The uncomfortable truth is that we have weakened terrorism, but also weakened democracy. Yep, Kristof really means it. Democracy is not always good for backwards nations. Especially not when the popular will is to install a dictatorship as soon as the election is over. Even Americans who normally care about human rights are unlikely to be squeamish about the suppression of Islamic hatemongers. Muslim militants are not just offensive in their speech but also destabilizing for their societies. But I still find it both ignoble and ineffective for the United States to acquiesce in their suppression, unless they directly incite violence. Kristof also finds it distasteful for college coeds to defend themselves from rapists, so take his little feelings with a grain of salt. Or perhaps with an entire salt lick. Egypt has been torturing Islamic fundamentalists for decades. Same with Algeria. Yet the only place where fundamentalists seem to be clearly losing popularity is Iran, where they alienated ordinary people by ruling them. Egypt tortures anti-Mubarak fundies, while encouraging other, even more brutal fundies in order to direct dissent away from Mubarak's misrule. Algeria is in yet another bloody civil war, where the secular military is trying like hell to keep the fundies from creating another Sudan. I'm glad to know which side Kristof is on. He's on the side of butchers -- because someone, somewhere might not be able to hear just how much someone wants to butcher them. So on balance I think it's unwise to avert our eyes as our pals in Uzbekistan, Egypt and other countries imprison and torture fundamentalists. Rather, we should allow Islamists (though not terrorists) to compete in the democratic arena and club them there (with democratic clubs, I hasten to add, in case some Arab police chief is reading this). I'm glad to know that Kristof's crystal ball can show him which nasty foreigners only say they're going to kill us, and which ones really will kill us. Thanks to Nick, we can tell our foreign buddies to round up the usual suspects, then we can declare victory and all go home and live happily ever after. At least until we're blown up. Will this work any better than force? I don't know. Plenty of people I asked scoffed. No way. "These are not groups you can defeat by the democratic process," said Ali al-Baher, president of the Housing Bank in Yemen, adding that if fundamentalists won an election they would never permit another. Just the way the left-liberals describe our Christian fundamentalists here at home. Dr. Ahmed Ateeq, a Western-educated physician, compared the Arab world today to Germany in the early 1930's, when Hitler used the ballot box to take power. "The situation is similar," he said. "A simple concept in difficult times of weak leadership, technological change, previous defeats — it was a perfect time for a nut like Hitler." And for radical Islamic nuts in the Arab world today. Yet Kristof still won't listen. There is weight in these arguments. But the Arab world has been in decline for six centuries because of a stultifying intellectual conformism, an insufficient clash of ideas, and so it seems particularly regrettable that our war on terror should lead to more repression. As compared to the lesser regret of losing thousands more of our people here at home? One example here in Yemen is illuminating. Oddly enough, the example is not going to illuminate anything other than Kristof's crushing naïveté. As a semi-democratic country, Yemen permits an Islamist party called Islah. Making the usual demagogic appeals, Islah vaulted to become the second-biggest party and was permitted to take power in the 1990's as part of a coalition government. It took the ministry of education and other key portfolios. But in the end, allowing Islamists a measure of power proved the best way to inoculate voters against them. The public became irritated by Islah's campaigns against liquor, by its efforts to bolster Islamic education at the expense of science, by its inefficiency and corruption. In the next elections, it was ejected from office. Churchill had it right: Democracy is the worst form of government, except for all the rest. I say this with some nervousness, but I'll still say it: We should not allow the war on terror to erode the freedom even of those Islamists whom we despise. That's certainly brave of him to suggest other countries endanger their very existance right before he flies back to New York. Kristof doesn't even bother to examine what would have happened had Islah been given a more important Ministry like, say, Defense. With control of the Army, would the Islamists have given up power so readily? Look, the Arab world suffers from a lack of free speech, sure. But also the utter lack of the rule of law, free markets, free trade, free enterprise, free elections, etc. These stiflings are all a slow-moving cancer that has been slowly destroying the Arab polity for centuries. Islamo-fascism is going on right now, and it's as serious as a heart attack -- and just as deadly. The problem is, Kristof wants to treat the slow moving cancer before he treats the heart attack. It doesn't take a doctor to know that Kristof has just completed a perfect four-peat. UPDATE: You catch a lot more typos after coffee than after wine. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Feel So Used Fridays PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 01:39:07 AM ----- BODY: I Feel So Used Fridays are my favorites. Working at home, I can have my weekend whenever, so it's not a TGIF thing. For me it comes down to the news. On Fridays we get Krauthammer to worship, Noonan to praise and flirt with, Kristof to ridicule, and Ebert to tell us what not to see this evening. I saved Noonan for last today, but that was a big oops. She's writing today on Pope John Paul II coming out against pedophilia. Here's her lede: This week an old giant returned to speak of what roils us. His words were welcome, heartening and necessary. But they were not, I think, sufficient. She goes on like this for approximately ever, when the only really necessary response to the Pope was "Hello, duh." I know a girl needs to make a living, but couldn't she have spent the verbiage more profitably making fun of Martha Stewart or just cribbing off of Krauthammer? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Joke, No Punchline, Not PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 01:41:23 AM ----- BODY: No Joke, No Punchline, Not Even Any Smarm Here's the hottest off the AP's presses, if you didn't catch it already on Drudge: After seizing Palestinian offices and scouring thousands of papers, Israel says documents show Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat authorized payment to a militant who allegedly had been involved in killing several Israelis. Exile is too good for the bastard. Kill him. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Coughing In the Kremlin StratFor PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 01:51:25 AM ----- BODY: Coughing In the Kremlin StratFor is one of those love'em or hate'em sites -- only they keep sliding between the two. The latest of theirs for WND falls under the latter. CIA Director George Tenet recently singled out Russia as a massive contributor to the spread of chemical, biological and nuclear weapons. Despite the cooperation Moscow has given to Washington's anti-terrorism campaign, the Bush administration is putting the Russian government on notice. A severe crisis between the two sides may now be forming. Yeah, OK, Russia sells things we don't like to countries we like even less. Hell, to countries who don't even like Russia. But the big problem isn't how many tanks or SAMs the Iraqis buy, or even how many nuclear reactors get built for Iran. We can deal with those, should the need arise. Meantime, they're paying customers who we won't sell to, so Russia is just supplying a demand. The big problem is Russian germs, chemicals, and nuclear weapons materials -- and for those there's no easy answer. The heart of the problem lies not so much in a Kremlin desire to proliferate WMDs, but in a lack of Kremlin control much outside of Moscow. Russia is barely held together, what little coherence exists is mostly due to fear and enertia, and is desperately poor. Until Russia is a real, functioning country with a real, functioning economy, then we're going to have a problem with rogue, uh, entrepreneurs selling bad things. There's no easy fix -- and so there's no reason for us to rupture relations over something the Russians can't do much about. StratFor is wrong on this one. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Dreams Do Come True I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 01:56:10 AM ----- BODY: Dreams Do Come True I don't often bother with Debka, but this one was just too juicy to pass up. Vice President Dick Cheney and Saudi Crown Prince Abdullah did not mince words when they met in Jeddah, according to the intelligence sources of DEBKA-Net-Weekly. I hope, once again, that the unminced words were delivered with the classic Cheney smirk. The two leaders crossed swords, as DEBKA-Net-Weekly's sources report, over Cheney's attempts to draw the Saudi ruler into lining up with America's strategy for the Middle East and the Gulf. Abdullah spelled out the dangers he believes the kingdom and the monarchy would incur by toeing the political and military line the United States has drawn in the sands of the region. Cheney retorted that Saudi opposition would have dire consequences for both the House of Saud and the kingdom's future. Word of Cheney's tough tone left the princes, kings, presidents and prime ministers of the region stunned. Until that moment, they had taken Bush's declaration – that those who are not with us are against us – as a phrase that left them plenty of room for maneuver. Confronted with the vice president, sources said, they suddenly realized Bush meant his warning quite literally. Welcome to the Big Show, you silly Saudi Royals. If you pay attention and toe the line, your family just might stay in power. But I hope not. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Weebles Wobble But They Don't PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 02:01:12 AM ----- BODY: Weebles Wobble But They Don't Blow the Crap Out Of the Bad Guys Compare the previous Debka-related post with Thursday's David Warren blog. Cheney's mostly-unheralded Middle East tour might just have been some of the most Machievellian US diplomacy since Kissinger was secretly jetting to China. Somebody tell the Instantman to worry just a little less about the Wobble Factor. It's still a good idea to worry a little, just don't go crazy with it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Wow. I Mean… Wow I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 11:15:21 AM ----- BODY: Wow. I Mean… Wow I have been Bleated by Lileks and compared favorably to Lileks by none other than the Professor – all in one day. Truly, I am a god. Seriously, what I am is quietly humbled. And as Melissa would love to tell you, that just doesn’t happen. Thanks, guys. UPDATE: If you're one of the (many hundreds of!) new visitors here today, and you'd like to comment on any of my little rantings, feel free to click on "Rant Back" above my head shot. Or, just click on the "Drinks" below each post and join in the public forum. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Were Speaking Only Yesterday PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 11:24:54 AM ----- BODY: We Were Speaking Only Yesterday Of Big British Brass Ones The world just got a little less interesting. Margaret Thatcher has been ordered by her doctors to give up public speaking. Something tells me she'll still be issuing printed statements, but it just won't be the same. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Iran (So Far Away) I'm PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 11:47:55 AM ----- BODY: Iran (So Far Away) I'm dipping in the Debka well twice today, because this second one is too silly to pass up. Debka claims that a recent note from Iranian "moderate" President Mohammed Khatami to Dick Cheney might signal an important split in the government there. Let's take a look at the story, and what was in the note. The note attempts to persuade the United States and Israel that carrying out plans to destroy Iran's nuclear reactor at Bushehr would be undeserved and counter-productive. There's less -- and more here -- than meets the eye. The note itself is remarkable for being the first communication from the theothugcratic government since President Bush lined Iran up in the Axis of Evil. The note is quite unremarkable for what it actually says. Iran wouldn't like it if we or the Israelis blew up their nuclear reactor? No shit? So then what message is the note trying to convey? Wait, there's more. Khatami disclaims at length any involvement by the Iranian government and armed forces in the smuggling of al-Qaida fighters out of Afghanistan to the Middle East. He places full responsibility for this operation squarely in the court of his colleague, Iran's supreme leader, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, who, he says, ran it with the help of his private intelligence agents, militia and loyal Revolutionary Guard elements. Khatami then goes on to provide details of a supposed split amongst the higher-ups in the Iranian government. Interesting, but is there anything we can do with that info? If true, then yes. But it's probably not true -- just disinformation to get us to dawdle instead of act. And even if it were, we should ignore it. Let's say Khatami is honest here. Why would he give us such juicy info? Obviously, he'd be looking for assistance in getting rid of the clerics and installing himself as the supreme power in Iran. And that would be a terrible idea. When the revolution comes in Iran, and it will, the best we can do is stand aside and quietly, very quietly, I'm-hunting-wabbits quietly provide aid to the democratic factions. But Iran's revolution must come from the street, otherwise we'll just be setting up Khatami as another Shah Pavlevi. You remember him? He was the focus of anti-Western hatred in Iran, the guy whose fall led to the current evil government. And neither Iran, nor the Middle East, nor the US can afford that again. The good news is, the fact that this note has been leaked tells us Bush is going to ignore it. NOTE: Sorry for the Flock of Seagulls reference in the headline. It was cheap and easy -- and all I could come up with. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tell Me Something Good Get PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 11:56:56 AM ----- BODY: Tell Me Something Good Get ready for something very, very good. None other than the irrepressible, irreplaceable Virginia Postrel is heading to DC to do a little reporting for us. I can't wait until she's back home and back in front of her word processor. Also, I'm at long last reading her book, The Future and Its Enemies. I don't know if she still does, but she had autographable copies for sale on her site a while back. Required reading. Oh, and leave some money in her tip jar. She's this close to making money. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Incoming! Snow? Over on StrategyPage, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 12:03:14 PM ----- BODY: Incoming! Snow? Over on StrategyPage, Steve Cole reports the Air Force used avalanches against the Taliban. No, really. Now if only there was some way to convert their beards into lightning rods... ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Oh, the Humanities! Some blogger PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 12:23:05 PM ----- BODY: Oh, the Humanities! Some blogger pointed out a couple months ago -- it was Glenn, or maybe me, or probably Ken -- that one of the least appreciated weapons in war is satire. Remember the WWII Bugs Bunny cartoons? Great stuff, putting Hitler and Tojo in their proper position: Grabbing ankles and taking it like an inmate. I remember 23 years ago, a wee lad of ten, drawing picture after picture of Ayatollah Khomeini with my buddy Kevin Kahlmeyer, and tossing them one by one into the crackling fireplace. We wasted a lot of paper that day, we certainly didn't do the hostages any good, but I remember my grandmother warmly smiling at us the whole time. I think we learned an important lesson that day about the uses of satire, primitive though it was. But now forget Bugs. Forget my little attempts at art. Jeff Goldstein of Protein Wisdom lets loose the entire humanities department on our enemies. And the results had coffee shooting out of my nose. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Long, But Worth Your Time PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 12:29:42 PM ----- BODY: Long, But Worth Your Time Go read Pejman Yousefzadeh's late night screed about the horrors of this war, and what it means to be a first-generation American. And then go be thankful the Pat Buchanans of the world haven't slammed the door shut yet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "You Realize, Of Course, That PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 12:35:48 PM ----- BODY: "You Realize, Of Course, That This Means War" I was going to write something typically sharp and bitter and cruel about Eric Alterman's ill-fated assault on Andrew Sullivan, but Dr. Frank beat me to the punch. Also, Doc did such a perfect job of it that nothing more needs to be said. Well, not until Andrew unleashes the next phase of his counter-offensive. NOTE: It's been a good day for Bugs references. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All Your Party Are Belong PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 01:05:51 PM ----- BODY: All Your Party Are Belong To Us Dan has written what might be the funniest thing ever on Happy Fun Pundit. Not bad for a puny human. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Good Gertz! Bill Gertz does PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 01:36:57 PM ----- BODY: Good Gertz! Bill Gertz does great work today, reporting on pro-China sentiment in the US Pacific Command, training the locals to fight barbarians, Hellfire assassinations, and Chinese missile diplomacy. Head on over to The Washington Times and check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Required Reading If you thought PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 06:29:25 PM ----- BODY: Required Reading If you thought VodkaPundit was brutal and funny, wait until you read John Scalzi. I promise you'll be offended. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Friday Night Blogs How did PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/22/2002 08:32:30 PM ----- BODY: Friday Night Blogs How did I go all day without catching the new Steyn? I usually don't bother you with bureaucratic shufflings, because it's boring. OK, that's a lie -- it can be frustrating and funny. And Steyn covers it much better than I do. Today he looks at all the to-and-fro-ing as Washington tries desperately not to go on a war footing while there's a war on. A few choice lines in no particular order or relevance: The newly federalized security scanners fall asleep on the job as often as the minimum-wage illegal-immigrant no-spikka-da-English felony-warrants-in-three-neighbouring-states old-school security scanners. The FAA forbids dead people from boarding, presumably in order to prevent al-Qaeda corpses from picking up their green cards. Worried about bioterror? Don't worry, the Centers for Disease Control is busy researching state variations in intimate-partner homicide. If you only have one priority, saving the civilized world is as good as any. I would prefer to set up the Robert C. Byrd Business As Usual Center, a West Virginia retirement home for the many Senators, Congressmen, cabinet secretaries and federal officials who don't seem to realize that there's a war on, that thousands of Americans were killed, and that, just for once, it's not about pork and time-serving and turf disputes. Yeah, those really are all from one column. Don't miss it. NOTE: Melissa is working tonight, and I've got to do something for the next hour or two. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If the Link Leaves a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/23/2002 03:50:06 PM ----- BODY: If the Link Leaves a Bad Taste In Your Mouth, Then You Read It Backwards Methinks the Prof doth share too much. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It's Easier If You Just PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/24/2002 02:59:57 PM ----- BODY: It's Easier If You Just Do What He Says Click the link. Sign the petition. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Safire Stopped Phoning It In PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:03:34 AM ----- BODY: Safire Stopped Phoning It In Bill Safire clearly and succinctly explains the entire Israeli-Palestine War in one quick column. It's Monday morning's Required Reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Is Anyone Left Unoffended? How PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:07:40 AM ----- BODY: Is Anyone Left Unoffended? How to win an Oscar for Everything: Make a special-effects laden movie about a black schizophrenic with an amazing chest and have it directed by Opie. Seriously, congrats to all the winners. I'm sure at least one or two of you deserved it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Gratuitous Plugs for Damn Never PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:14:37 AM ----- BODY: Gratuitous Plugs for Damn Never Everything There's nothing quite so ephemeral as a hit. And that goes double (half?) for web hits. Yes, my coveted link at Lileks (it's like having dinner with Andre or breakfast at Tiffany's) is no longer current or fresh. But to make up for it, James has a damn fine new Bleat and a new Screed. There's just one challenge left: Getting that Sullivan mention. How about it, Andrew? I'll be extra witty and continue to say nice things about the Brits. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In The Guardian Wow. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:26:11 AM ----- BODY: Only In The Guardian Wow. I'm not finding anything horribly offensive in Monday's issue. Maybe I got out of practice over the weekend, but I don't think so. So, if you see anything really, truly awful, silly, stupid, unintentionall hysterical, or all of the above, shoot it over my way. You'll get a mention, a link if appropriate, and a lollipop. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:31:43 AM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest Part VIII An amazing troika of photos from StrategyPage. Two Navy F-18s collided midair, yet somehow both made it safely onto the tarmac. When you take a look at the damage, you'll be amazed that not only did the pilots live, but it looks like both jets are salvagable. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Forum When the war PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:41:42 AM ----- BODY: Today's Forum When the war is fought not against your tank and aircraft, but against your kindergarten teachers and pizza parlors, how do you win? Newsweek puts the question even more bluntly: "How Will Israel Survive?" Followed by yet more questions: Will the Jewish state survive? At what cost? With what identity? Can it ever know peace? Is it too late for any solution at all? Who knows how to ask that question? Who knows how to give the answer? There's more. Read the whole article, which I think is taken from this week's newstand edition. The story doesn't offer many answers, but maybe you have some. Just click on the Drinks below. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: AgentAppletree EMAIL: irrelevent@noneyobidness.com IP: 205.188.200.138 URL: http://www.jtf.org DATE: 03/28/2002 06:14:26 AM Complete and utter left-wing bullshit. 9 left wing sources, one right wing source and a 14 year old kid? Give me a break. visit www.jtf.org ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Call It the Nine PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:52:10 AM ----- BODY: We Call It the Nine Millimeter Retirement Plan From USA Today: Iraq said on Sunday it was ready to receive a U.S. delegation to discuss the fate of an American pilot shot down over Iraq during the 1991 Gulf War. Meanwhile, Saddam Hussein makes other noises about possibly letting UN weapons inspectors return to his country. What's going on here? Is Saddam suddenly playing nice? Of course not. We went through this same routine in late '90/early '91, as Hussein tried to talk his way out of Gulf War I. All Saddam had to do to avoid war then was pull out of Kuwait -- which he was too stupid to do. All he has to do to avoid war this time, is drop dead. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Coming Soon: Falafel Hut Get PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 02:02:20 AM ----- BODY: Coming Soon: Falafel Hut Get ready for more bloodshed. Israel is planning to step up its actions against Palestinian "cities, towns, and refugee camps" if the current round of "peace" talks ends. Hell, I should have put quotes around "if." The good news? It will be mostly Palestinian blood hitting the streets. I swear to Whomever I've never entertained a racist thought in my life, but I am becoming anti-Arab in a way that I'm almost ashamed of. But hey, if they're willing to quit targeting women and children, I'd be willing to have happy thoughts about them for a change. Deal? As I said last week, I'm about one or two atrocities away from wishing Israel would expel every single last Palestinian from the West Bank. And the other bit of land could be bulldozed and made into the Gaza Strip Mall. NOTE: I'm reminded of an old Letterman Gag from Gulf War I. Under Top Ten Iraqi Jeapordy categories was "Sounds Like Shi'ite." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "Remember Communism? Didn't That Suck?" PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 02:11:00 AM ----- BODY: "Remember Communism? Didn't That Suck?" Remember how during the Cold War, Americans from the left, right, center, and wingnut extremes all shouted in one voice and shook one first and stood as one against Communism? Yeah, neither do I. Neither does the Washington Post's Fred Hiatt. And he's smart enough to compare the Better Red Than Dead idiots of 20 years ago, to today's crop of Better Blown Up Than Grown Up morons. From Hiatt's column: Now those glossed-over divisions are reemerging, in parallel to, and as a consequence of, the drawing of battle lines with regard to President Bush's war on terrorism. The post-9/11 unanimity also is eroding, with both liberals and conservatives challenging what they see as Bush's vision of "permanent war." Small-government conservatives worry about the reemergence of a vast national security establishment; liberals see a plot to maintain presidential popularity and thwart progressive initiatives. And as they begin to grope for a way to oppose the administration without seeming unpatriotic, they are echoing, sometimes explicitly, their Cold War divisions. In the liberal American Prospect, for example, Paul Starr sees the war on terrorism as providing "the functional equivalent of the Cold War" to pave the way for "tax cuts, huge increases in military expenditures, deficits and the consequent exclusion of all the initiatives that liberals might offer." Lewis Lapham in Harper's Magazine says the significance of 9/11 is being exaggerated (the Enron bankruptcy is "almost as spectacular as the collapse of the World Trade Center," he writes, "but nobody pokes around in the rubble for a world-changing paradigm") in order, apparently, to continue the Cold War task "of replacing the antiquated American republic, modest in ambition and democratic in spirit, with the glory of a nationstate increasingly grand in scale and luxurious in its taste for hegemony." He's right, of course, and we've had this dialogue going on in the blogosphere for months now. There were some bad days throughout the Cold War, when it looked like the idiots might take power. We'll have those days again in the Current Mess, I'm sure. Just stick to your guns (so to speak), speak out at every chance, and vote Hawk. NOTE: I think I just coined "Better Blown Up Than Grown Up" to describe the new crop of anti-war chowderheads, and their childish slogans. Is it a keeper? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Sullivan Crusade First Ken PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 02:30:25 AM ----- BODY: The Sullivan Crusade First Ken linked. Then Tim. Quickly followed by the Good Professor. Then -- bam! -- James Lileks. Now VodkaPundit is aiming for a mention on Sullivan. And so starts the first edition of a daily feature called The Sullivan Crusade. Each and every day, I'm going to link to an Andrew Sullivan post, say some disgustingly obsequious words, then laugh at myself for failing, once again, to get mentioned by the Godblogger. So here we go. (Ahem) Wow! Did you read what Andrew wrote today about minorities who don't stay down on the thought plantation? Genius! I swear, that man can write. And so smart. Also good looking. Did I mention I'm typing this with my head bowed down in reverence? That's enough for the first attempt. And now, back to our regular blogging. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Is That A Gun In PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 02:34:44 AM ----- BODY: Is That A Gun In Your Pocket Or Are You Just Happy To Negotiate? Don't miss the latest Rich Lowry column. I cribbed it from today's Washington Times. Mr. Arafat was having an argument with one of his security chiefs, when the security official banged his fist on the table. This apparently is not just bad manners, but potentially a shooting offense: Mr. Arafat brandished the pistol that is always at his side and reportedly shouted, "You are a collaborator for Israel and America." The two were separated before anyone could draw blood. So it goes during WWF pay-per-view specials and high-level deliberations of the Palestinian Authority. As this incident and many more demonstrate, Mr. Arafat essentially is a gangster who happens to have a large caucus favorable to him at the United Nations. Let's remember that as Anthony Zinni tries to get peace talks going. When Arafat doesn't get his way, the only way to prevent him from killing people is to use force. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That Nasty Flu Bug Compares PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 02:44:41 AM ----- BODY: That Nasty Flu Bug Compares Favorably With Ebola The Times writes up new Tory leader Iain Duncan Smith -- and compares him favorably to our own GW Bush. Ben MacIntyre writes: ”Compassion” and “Conservatism” in the same sentence? The folksy humour? The personal anecdotes? The buzz words: “inclusion”, “responsibility”, “tolerance”, “decency.” The politician determined to distance himself from the past, but who owes his political inheritance to a famous and divisive parent-figure? Give IDS a Texas twang instead of his military bark, and replace the phrase “Whitehall red tape” with “Washington bureaucracy”, and it might have been George W. Bush himself addressing the Tory faithful in Harrogate. I don't always think much of Bush's domestic politics, but there are a couple of reasons why W's 2000 approach is a good idea for Smith. First, Bush managed to beat Al Gore with the same strategy, even though Gore had all the advantages of incumbancy. So it's a proven approach. Second, he sure isn't going to be able to run to the right of Tony Blair on foreign policy, not even by promising to nuke Baghdad. It will be interesting to watch Smith's campaign unfold. Meanwhile, it's still a mystery if the favorable comparison was meant as a compliment to Smith. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Is An Ex-Blog! The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 11:08:40 AM ----- BODY: This Is An Ex-Blog! The secret blog burial ground. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Schadenfreude My first Internet connection PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 11:22:47 AM ----- BODY: Schadenfreude My first Internet connection was through AOL. So you'll pardon me if I call this Daily News story "sweet, sweet justice." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Sullivan Crusade Advances More PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 11:29:30 AM ----- BODY: The Sullivan Crusade Advances More brilliance from Andrew on a Bush/Rice ticket in 2004: She could also help Bush to achieve his dream of winning more than the paltry ten percent of black votes he did in 2000, a demographic group Democrats desperately need to keep locked up to keep an edge in presidential politics. Rice - coming from the South and Mountain West, but also provost of one of California's greatest universities - makes geographic sense as well. And, best of all, she's a trusted conservative. Her instincts are Bush's: realist, uncompromising but flexible in a pinch. And he trusts her deeply. Since I'm still sucking up to Sullivan, I won't mention that this meme has been floating through the blogosphere for weeks. Also, I'm hoping for a Rice/Paglia ticket in 2008. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Beating the Decayed Corpse of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 11:47:32 AM ----- BODY: Beating the Decayed Corpse of a Long-Dead Horse I'll assume you've already read Michael Ledeen's piece today on the Iran/PLO connection. If not, here's the key graf: It shouldn't have taken so long to figure this out, of course. Iran and the PLO have been cooperating intimately since 1972, but the truth is always welcome, and one probably shouldn't quibble over a mere thirty years. And when Ledeen says "intimately," I'm pretty sure he means that in the full, Clintonian sense of the word. What it comes down to though, is something Ledeen wrote back in February and this site has been arguing even longer. Namely, we should topple the mullahs in Iran before we take on Saddam Hussein. The best part is, we won't have to do much. The Persian Street will kindly string up their leaders for us. For themselves, really. Do I have any readers in the Pentagon or the State Department? Can't you pass this up the chain? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Future And Its Enemas PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 12:09:27 PM ----- BODY: The Future And Its Enemas Best Blog Of The Day has to go to this Stryker Rant. Everyone seems to have some feeling or some nebulous half-realized notion that something's happening and that this "something" will have an enormous impact on the future. We can't conceptualize it, define it or point at it and say, "Aha! That's it!" But we know it's there, like some formless dark shape in the twilight wood, slowly stalking us and ready to pounce at any moment. He's right, of course. There are all sorts of things to be hopeful, yet vaguely uneasy, about. Cloned organs and gene therapy could double our lifespans. What might that do to families when there's no need to have children before you're retired? What becomes of retirement plans when Century birthdays are as common as turning 50 is today? Heinlein's Starship Toopers made real will not only drastically increase the expense of our armed forces, they will also force a drastic new organization and downsizing. The RIFs of the early 90s will look tiny. In politics, the current war and the centrifugal forces of high tech and market mobility will drastically alter the world map. Are we ready for the return of marches and city states? Imagine a world where Britsh Columbia leaves Canada -- then Vancouver leaves BC. And that's just three little advances in an age when progress keeps accelerating -- compound interest for societal upheaval. Anyway, go read all of Sarge's post. Damn good stuff. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sunday Bloody Sunday Every Bloody PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 12:21:14 PM ----- BODY: Sunday Bloody Sunday Every Bloody Day of the Week For an infantryman, there's nothing worse than street fighting. Every building is filled with holes, and each hole can hide a bad guy with a gun. When my buddy Rob was going through Advanced Infantry Training (AIT) before shipping of to Korea, I remember what he said about street fighting: "If the Lieutenant tells you to go take that building, you figure you're probably gonna die. Then you go do it." In city fighting, even the Marines count on at least a third of their men being killed or wounded, sometimes as high as 75%. And that's for every day they fight. We have a small, expensive, highly motivated, and well-trained military. We can't afford to throw our men away like that. To make things worse, in the future, most wars will be fought in cities. Something has to be done. Thanks to a link from Kat, now we know that something is being done. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Oh. That Is A Thumb PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 12:32:32 PM ----- BODY: Oh. That Is A Thumb In Your Pocket Link via Dr. Frank. Rita Rudner once said that a man with an earring is better prepared for marriage because he's "bought jewelry and experienced pain." Now, it turns out kids with Game Boys may be better equipped for the future -- and that "all thumbs" may be a compliment in the New Millenium. Reports the Observer: Use of hand-held technologies, such as mobile phones, GameBoys and computers, has caused a physical mutation in the under-25s, according to new research. The study, carried out in nine cities around the world, shows that the thumbs of the younger generation have overtaken their fingers as the hand's most muscled and dexterous digit. The change affects those who have grown up with hand-held devices capable of text messaging, emailing and accessing internet services. Experts claim it proves technology is causing physical alterations that previously happened over generations. Reminds me of a little joke my Dad used to tell way back when. He predicted that sometime in the future, we'd evolve to have an enormous skull and just one long finger for pushing buttons. The future isn't so far away anymore. Freaky, eh? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Let the Blogs Roll On PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 12:44:51 PM ----- BODY: Let the Blogs Roll On Martin Devon's PatioPundit is another one of those sites I kept meaning to link. Finally did. You'll find him under Luncheon Cordials. I'm blogrolling Martin despite the fact that he emailed my silly Sullivan Crusade gag to the Godblogger himself. I am this close to blushing. Which as my bestest friend Kat can tell you, has happened no more than once in the last five years. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And the Loser Is... Rober PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:00:25 PM ----- BODY: And the Loser Is... Rober Carr issues his own War Academy Awards™. Actually, it's more like the Razzies. Don't miss it. If you're not familiar with the Razzies, then don't miss that link, either. They're just like the Academy Awards™. But honest. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Homecoming Juan Gato, Charles Austin, PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 01:20:34 PM ----- BODY: Homecoming Juan Gato, Charles Austin, MCJ -- how many St. Louis-area bloggers are there out there? Make a note in the Drinks if you are one. I should mention I'm curious because that's where I was born & raised. I am so St. Louis that I even followed the time-honored prep tradition of attending St. Louis Country Day School. Right up until they asked me to leave. The first -- but not last -- time I'd been 86ed. We'll be getting back to war and politics shortly. But now it's time for lunch. UPDATE: I think I know why StL produces so many bloggers. You guys still can't get over the fact that the Globe is gone and all you have left is the Post-Dispatch. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bad Pun Warning Link via PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 03:50:46 PM ----- BODY: Bad Pun Warning Link via Drudge. AP reports that Playboy is taking submissions for a Girls of Enron pictorial. Crass? You bet. Funny? Yeppers. But not very appropriate. Hef should really be scouting the women over at Silicon Graphics. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Stupid Bush Domestic Policy PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 04:21:42 PM ----- BODY: More Stupid Bush Domestic Policy Dale Felber of BusinessBay sends this link to a story I caught over the weekend, then promptly forgot to do anything with. Strangely enough, there was no drinking involved. Here's the email: Global Strategy is reporting that a trillion dollars will be pulled out of US and European banks by the Arab countries: http://www.geostrategy-direct.com/geostrategy-direct/ I don't blame them for leaving. The US government can now freeze anyone's assests without any thought of due process and they're forcing this policy onto offshore banks as well. See http://www.treas.gov/ofac/. A trillion dollars isn't crippling to a country with a GDP almost ten times that, and capitalization and liquidity that dwarf the GDP. But it's still a damn good chunk of liquidity just gone. And don't forget the effect that loss os liquidity has on lending. Banks tend to get shy about putting more money out there when they've just lost a (technical term coming up) shitload of deposits. So the ripple effects could be enough to smother this young economic expansion in its crib. I don't have enough hard numbers here to do the math, so I'll let someone go bug Megan McArdle about the figures. This may sound oxymoronic, but it isn't: One of the reasons so many people leave their money in US banks is because they know they can get it back out. Their deposits are safe, and their liquidity is truly liquid. If we start treating foreign depositors the way Third World nations do, then they'll start treating us like a Third World economy. Argentina can happen here. Dale wrote his own punchline, so I saved it for last: A trillion dollars gone from our banking system will have a negative effect on our economy. An almost British sense of understatement there, Dale! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Information Is Free. Except Where PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 05:34:12 PM ----- BODY: Information Is Free. Except Where Prohibited Taking a lesson from his Soviet counterparts, Fidel Castro has banned consumer sales of PCs in Cuba. You might remember the Soviet Union once had strong controls and licensing of photocopiers and fax machines -- and look at where it got them. Give Castro this much credit -- he apparently is well aware of the threat interconnected computers would pose to his regime. Boris Yeltsin brought down a KGB coup because they never thought to take away his fax lines. Imagine what the Internet could do to a tiny little dictator. But why am I lecturing blog readers on the power of networks? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Those Zoroastrian Kids Sure Are PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 05:38:58 PM ----- BODY: Those Zoroastrian Kids Sure Are Hot Uthant is finally back, and asks why Jewish boys aren't worth molesting. It's tonight's Happy Hour Reading. Don't miss it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bowing To Peer Pressure Everyone PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/25/2002 10:11:01 PM ----- BODY: Bowing To Peer Pressure Everyone else is doing it, so here's my avatar. In real life, I'm slightly taller.

I'm sorry you had to see that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: She Shore Talks Mighty Big PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:07:54 AM ----- BODY: She Shore Talks Mighty Big For a Young’un There’s a new blogger in town. Goes by the name of Lori Anne Byrnes. But folks ‘round here call her “Rumination,” I reckon. Enough fake Wild West stuff. Instead, let me paraphrase Jackson Brown: That girl can blog. Check out Lori’s Ruminations. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Truly Gallagherian Humor, Only Without PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:09:58 AM ----- BODY: Truly Gallagherian Humor, Only Without the Watermelon In a sign and/or portent that will have Jehovah’s Witnesses scurrying for their survival kits, today Nicolas Kristof tries to be funny. I know my more, ah, fervent readers expect and demand a Nick Kristof takedown each and every Tuesday and Friday, but. . .but there’s nothing less funny than analyzing bad jokes. So I’ll mostly let the material die on its own. Whether or not we invade Iraq to topple Saddam Hussein, let's go about this the American way. Let's sue him. Wacky! What high concept! Wait, I’ve got something even fresher: Let’s create a sitcom with daffy-yet-loveable characters, but we’ll set it in their workplace! The United States should launch an effort to prosecute Saddam for crimes against humanity. This would destabilize his regime at home, encourage more defections of Iraqi officials and military officers, and increase the prospect of a coup that, in the best-case scenario, would render an invasion unnecessary. Ha-ha! Nick is killing me here. Destabilize Saddam through the World Court, when years of trying more conventionally unconventional methods for a decade haven’t worked. Gut-busting fun! I came across this idea in references in books by Richard Butler, who led the United Nations inspection effort in Iraq, and by Kanan Makiya, author of the leading account of Saddam Hussein's Iraq. It also turns out that a British organization, Indict, is already pursuing an indictment against Saddam for war crimes. Well, Nick is no Fatty Arbuckle, but I still expect a better attempt at humor than just mentioning Richard Butler. Butler is as passé as “Clinton didn’t inhale” jokes or Joey Buttafuoco references. Mr. Makiya writes that the best way to topple an Iraqi leader is to make him lose face. As an example, he cites the Ottoman-era practice of the people of Takrit (Saddam's hometown) of seizing the governor for the area, humiliating him (often by sexually abusing his women) and then releasing him unharmed. OK, that’s kinda-sorta funny. You’ve got that whole Byzantine nose-cutting-off type-punishment going. Although, frankly, some prison shower humor would have been a better fit. Improvement, but still no actual humor. I would not recommend this precise approach. But a drive to indict Saddam for genocide against the Kurds, along with other crimes, suggesting that he will end his days in a prison cell, will humiliate him in a similar way, squeezing him and encouraging those around him to look for an exit while there is still time. OK, I admit that Kristof’s recommendations are usually good for a laugh. But, strangely enough, not the one time he’s really trying to be funny. "In Washington, you either have the war hounds who want to bomb Iraq and take Saddam out, or the folks who just want to contain Saddam because at least he keeps Iraq together," said Joost Hiltermann, who has examined 18 tons of Iraqi documents seized in Kurdistan and brought to the United States, and who is now writing a book about Iraq and its use of chemical weapons. "But there is a third option" — a legal case, with or without a military attack. The bit about “18 tons” was a cute little reference to the old Monty Python gag. But it was a 16 ton weight. The secret to comedy is getting all those small touches just right. The rest of it I just didn’t get. He goes on with a bunch more like that, getting less and less funny as he goes along. So let’s treat this like a bad detective story and skip to the end. Now's the time. Let's throw the book at Saddam. I’m no paid humor professional, but couldn’t Hussein just duck or something? More than twenty years ago, Steve Martin told us that comedy isn’t pretty. Steve was overly optimistic. UPDATE: It has been brought to my attention that Kristof wasn’t kidding. Please disregard this entire post, except for that clever bit about sitcoms and the nice linkage I worked so hard on. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Notes From Home My PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:13:00 AM ----- BODY: More Notes From Home My beloved St. Louis Cardinals, one of the greatest and most storied teams in all of baseball, is turning into just another MLB franchise. Go on and say you told me so. The truth already hurts plenty. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Only Time I Didn’t PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:14:54 AM ----- BODY: The Only Time I Didn’t Agree, I’d Misread the Column It’s easy to tell when it’s going to be a good week – we’re treated to an early Krauthammer. Today Big K looks at the “root causes” of Palestinian suicide bombers: The advent of suicide bombing coincides precisely with the era of Israeli conciliation and peacemaking: recognition of the PLO, repeated concessions of territory, establishment of the Palestinian Authority, acceptance of an armed Palestinian police -- all culminating in the unprecedented offer of an independent Palestinian state with its capital in a shared Jerusalem. It is precisely in the context of the most accommodating, most conciliatory, most dovish Israeli policy in history that the suicide bombings took hold. The barbarity in the West Bank has been going on so long now, I’d forgotten that. Intifada I was sticks and stones against the entire IDF – which is partly why the Palestinians got so much sympathy. But why the disconnect between then and now? During the past eight years -- the years of the Oslo "peace process" -- Yasser Arafat had complete control of all the organs of Palestinian education and propaganda. It takes an unspeakable hatred for people to send their children to commit Columbine-like murder-suicide. Arafat taught it. His television, his newspapers, his clerics have inculcated an anti-Semitism unmatched in virulence since Nazi Germany. That part you might have guessed by now. It all comes down to what I’ve said, what Glenn has said, what Den Beste has said – Arafat has got to go. Israel can exile him during his trip to Beirut this month, or they can kill him where he lives. But I’m afraid having the State Department ignore him just won’t cut it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He’s No Ambrose What a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:16:31 AM ----- BODY: He’s No Ambrose What a day! Tuesday is second only to Saturday on the Bad Punditry Day. Not this week, kids. Not only did we get an early Krauthammer, but here’s a hot’n’steamy pile of George Will droppings, two days ahead of schedule. The only problem is, Will doesn’t have much new for us. Here’s the lede: The war on terrorism is suddenly going terribly wrong. Suicide bombers serving Yasser Arafat, the world's senior and most successful terrorist, have caused U.S. policy in the Middle East to buckle and become more accommodating. So more than six months into the war on terror, terror is more vindicated as a tactic than ever before. What, is Will cribbing off the warbloggers? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In The Guardian There PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:26:28 AM ----- BODY: Only In The Guardian There wasn't anything uniquely Guardian-bad today, but there was a pretty hysterical (both senses) column about American network TV news by the reliably inept Matthew Engle. Here's what Engle thinks us philistines on the other side of the pond want for news: I am still working on the technology that will produce wholly personalised bulletins that give the day's news its true importance in a viewer's life. Tonight's headlines: BONG! Rita from Accounts smiled at me today! BONG! Speculation mounts that I'll ask her out. BONG! Kev from Marketing counsels caution. BONG! In other news, economic shock as credit card bill arrives. BONG! Auntie Glad's varicose veins get worse. BONG! America invades Afghanistan. You can probably guess just how condescending and awful the rest of it is. Hell, he can't even get facts straight about commercial time, or that Americans are watching more news than ever, just not on the Big Three. You can't get that kind of unedited idiocy just anywhere -- it's only in The Guardian. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ha.to EMAIL: email@email.com IP: 194.117.133.196 URL: DATE: 03/30/2002 04:26:20 PM seems you can't even spell. Seriously, you're part of the problem not part of the answer ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Then I Dare You To PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:35:20 AM ----- BODY: Then I Dare You To Step Over This Line Link via Drudge. AP reports that China is refusing a routine Hong Kong port call by the USS Curtis Wilbur. Our sailors have been drinking and whoring in Hong Kong at least since 1945, and probably before the War, too. A stopover there is no biggie. And with a name like "Curtis Wilbur," if you guessed this isn't some big, dangerous nuclear weapons-carrying warship, you're right. She's just a small Arleigh Burke-class destroyer. So what the hell is China doing? Just trying to tweak our noses over Taiwan is all. Here's a little advice for the Butchers of Beijing: Guys, you can only stop the US Navy from sailing in when you're at peace with us. In time of war, our Navy sails where it wants. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Will Someone Dig Up Dirt PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:44:06 AM ----- BODY: Will Someone Dig Up Dirt On How Much Porn the Judge Rents? The NannyState will not die. Supreme Court Justice, Robert F. Julian, has banned a divorced mother from smoking when her son stays with her. The boy suffers from no medical conditions, such as asthma, that could be made worse by his mother's smoking. From conception to beyond the grave, Uncle Sam wants to take care of YOU! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: So That's Why Both Movies PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:51:48 AM ----- BODY: So That's Why Both Movies Sucked Over at Reason, David Levy and Sandra Peart put into words for me why I'm not an H.G. Wells fan. I'd been trying to figure it out for years -- he's a state-worshiping Victorian prig. Levy & Peart do a much more expert job than my snide little summary. Go read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: If You Ban Convicts, Then PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:59:17 AM ----- BODY: If You Ban Convicts, Then Only Vic Can Ban Ifs. Or Something I always seem to catch him late, but I seem to be about the only blogger who regularly reports on Thomas Sowell. In Monday's column, Sowell uses the Yates sentencing to expound on how the government keeps us -- and even itself! -- ignorant of the comings and goings of violent convicts. Considering what detailed statistics are kept in sports - you can find out how many times Ty Cobb hit into double plays 80 years ago -- it is truly ironic how few records are kept on those who make decisions that can cost other people their lives. Perhaps that is because the payoff matters in sports, while in much social policy what matters is that people with power keep it -- and conceal any information that would threaten their theories. Sowell is this morning's Required Reading. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: News From the Far East PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:17:41 AM ----- BODY: News From the Far East In today's Boston Globe (Motto: "We Just Voted To Have Ourselves Nationalized!"), Bob Durand writes: As the depression of the Central Artery nears completion, the restoration of its scarred surface provides us all with an extraordinary opportunity to reclaim a critical piece of downtown Boston and create the Rose Kennedy Greenway. Greenway? Sounds far too Jewish for a Kennedy. But what I really wanted to link to from today's Globe is the new Cathy Young piece. You might know her from her column (which I don't read nearly as often as I should) or her excellent work in Reason (which you should subscribe to immediately for the low, low price of just 15 bucks. I paid more, but I got a sweet new coffee mug out of the deal). Anyway, there is a point in here somewhere, I promise: Just like the question of Andrea Yates's guilt, the question of whether Russell Yates bears partial responsibility for his children's death has turned, to some extent, into a gender issue - with feminists lined up on one side, men's advocates on the other. At first glance, it was hard to see this man as anything other than the sixth victim in the case: a father who lost everything he had in one terrible moment. But as Andrea Yates's family and friends (including Russell Yates himself) described the overwhelming evidence of her mental illness, people inevitably started to ask how any man in his right mind could leave his five young children in the care of a seriously disturbed woman. I honestly don't know where I stand on all this. I shocked the hell out of myself for agreeing with Krauthammer when he said Yates shouldn't receive the death penalty. So now Cathy Young, who made her name denouncing what passes these days for feminism, comes out against Russell Yates, I'm thrown for another loop. Help me out here. Comment, please. Just click on the drinks. UPDATE: Blogger was down, so it took longer than expected to add the link I forgot last night. All done now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Mandatory Linkage Lileks is feeling PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:23:57 AM ----- BODY: Mandatory Linkage Lileks is feeling better after his bout with the Winter Icky, and you can tell. Any writer who crafts a little paragraph better than anything I've ever written, but procedes it with a disclaimer about how he's just warming up... well, that's a man at the top of his game. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Sullivan Crusade The Ongoing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:32:09 AM ----- BODY: The Sullivan Crusade The Ongoing Adventures Of One Blogger's Attempt To Get Linked Sigh. It's hard to be an obsequious little suck-up when Andrew only has two new posts for me to comment on, neither one of which is especially newsworthy. Although I did like his phrase, "the somewhat listless post-Kinsley Slate." Flows nicely, don't you think? Since I don't have much to work with, I'll just put up the usual boilerplate about how Andrew is witty and brilliant and erudite. Also, he doesn't give you that Let's Hurt Him With Tweezers feeling like you get from reading Hitch sometimes. Not only that, but I'm sure he looks just fab in those black leather pants. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bloggers Is As Bloggers Roll PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:39:41 AM ----- BODY: Bloggers Is As Bloggers Roll He calls himself a "lesser blogger," so beware -- he might tell other lies, too. Depsite his triflings with the truth, here's a long overdue blogroll to Craig Schamp and his Ramblings. You'll find Craig from now on under Hair O' The Dog, down and left. NOTE: The Blogroll is getting so long that I might have to come up with new categories soon, just to avoid the MEGO effect. Suggestions, anyone? ANOTHER NOTE: MEGO Effect is not to be confused with the Mego toy company, who made the last really great action figures. My childhood would not have been the same without their 8-inch Spiderman and Superman figures. Also, I would have probably jumped off a lot fewer ledges, trying to fly and/or spin webs. ONE LAST NOTE: I'd almost forgotten just how hot the Batgirl figure was. No wonder I grew up so twisted. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogger Is Back and Badder PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:20:56 PM ----- BODY: Blogger Is Back and Badder Than Ever Jim Dunnigan, Al Nofi, and Steve Cole at StrategyPage are usually up to putting me in my place. Today Dunnigan paraphrases Eisenhower in a piece called "No Pundit Ever Survives Contact with a Historian." The techniques we used in Afghanistan weren't all that new -- and Dunnigan was one of the first to predict them. Optional reading, but you won't want to miss it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Dog Ate My Homework PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:27:35 PM ----- BODY: The Dog Ate My Homework Am I the last to notice -- again! -- that there's a new Mark Steyn? I'm sure you've read it already, I'm sure others have already given it due praise, analysis, and quotage. But here's the VodkaPundit link anyway. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Cuba Is Lovely This Time PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 12:45:40 PM ----- BODY: Cuba Is Lovely This Time Of Year For Summary Executions Rich Lowry takes another look at the Camp X-Ray detainees: In fact, they are unlawful combatants. Whether they are al Qaeda or Taliban, they belong to organizations that don't respect the laws of war, and flunk the other tests for a legitimate army (wearing uniforms, having a discernable chain of command, etc.). This means their rights under international law are minimal. They have a right, essentially, to humane treatment and a trial with a modicum of due process before they go to see the firing squad. As former Reagan and Bush official David Rivkin points out, this means the tribunals could have been all secret, had no appellate process, and had the same standard for guilt as a civil trial (a preponderance of evidence) — and still amply fulfilled any international or constitutional legal obligation we have to the detainees. Unlawful belligerents have always gotten harsh treatment. George Washington gave a British spy captured behind American lines out of uniform an ad hoc trial lasting all of three hours, with execution swiftly following. 'Nuff said. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Beating a Dead Horse of PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:02:31 PM ----- BODY: Beating a Dead Horse of a Different Color to Water Before The Barn Door Burns Down Also in today's NRO, comes more evidence of the need to topple the Iranian mullahs before we take on Iraq. Michael Rubin reports: I lived in northern Iraq for nine months last year while teaching Iranian history at local universities. While there, the Iranian government — so often portrayed as reformist or moderate in the American press — worked tirelessly to both promote Islamic Revolution and undermine stability not only in the U.S.-protected safe haven, but in Turkey as well. There is no compromise, no negotiation possible when the other side seeks your destruction. Do we turn our backs on our invaluable Turkish allies, in the name of "dialogue" with a barbarian tyranny bent on expansion? We need to stand by Turkey. And they'll stand by us. But if we treat our allies contemptuously, we'll get more contemptuous allies. And do we really want another France? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'll Take Two of Whatever PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:11:53 PM ----- BODY: I'll Take Two of Whatever She's Having Kevin has new cheesecake posted. Vinyl garters and seamed stockings. Yeah, baby! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Best of the Blogs PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:17:34 PM ----- BODY: Today's Best of the Blogs Don't tell Happy Fun Pundit's Dan that he's writing way above mere satire these days -- we don't want him to change anything. Here are a couple snippets from his latest, a piece on Canada's armed forces. Yes, they have some, and yes, they're quite good. Read: But mostly, Canada's soldiers train interchangeably with Americans and participate in so many joint exercises that the difference between them comes down to a unit-by-unit comparison and not an overall quality advantage for one over the other. For instance, the Canadian team from William Tell '94 is part of a joint Canadian/American NORAD squadron that is so closely integrated that they flew both flags together and the Americans and Canadians cheered each other on as if they were part of one team. And you know what? We are. I gave away the ending, but it was so good I just couldn't help myself. But the rest is even better, so click over already and read it. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Blogrolls, Please Will Warren PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:19:44 PM ----- BODY: More Blogrolls, Please Will Warren is at it again. That's all you need to know. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Post Does Not Involve PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:26:30 PM ----- BODY: This Post Does Not Involve Probate or Nietzsche Speaking of Wills, Will Wilkinson brutally sums up our two most recent Attorneys General: Ashcroft is an unlikable prick. Reno burns babies. And I thought I was harsh on the old bat. It's good to see I'm not alone. UPDATE: I'm stealing Will's phrase "boatload of Condis" and turning it into my own, private, really quite amazingly dirty fantasy. If any adult film producers are reading this, let's talk. One condition: Asparagirl is in charge of casting. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Best I Could Do Was PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:40:56 PM ----- BODY: Best I Could Do Was Take Michael Palin Two Out Of Three In Thumb Wrestling Em Jones takes on the entire BBC -- and wins. Twice. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Can They DO That? This PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 01:58:31 PM ----- BODY: Can They DO That? This from Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Infected Pustule."): Arafat will not be traveling to Beirut for the Arab League summit there this week. Through a spokesman, the PA barbarian-in-chief said, "This has nothing to do with the Israelis and their tanks just down the street. I wasn't really ever formally invited to the summit, I didn't want to go anyway, and I have other obligations right here in my office." Like waiting for the IDF tanks to back up a little more. So much for exile. Assassination, then? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: When All Else Fails, Lower PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 02:11:04 PM ----- BODY: When All Else Fails, Lower Your Standards Very Smart (and very connected) Reader Will Collier chimes in on Dan's praise of the Royal Canadian Air Force: While the USAF teams were required to complete AMRAAM shoots during their competitive missions--which, thanks to AMRAAM's capabilities, were the most complex and difficult of all the Tell shots--the Canadians were allowed to skip that part of the competition without fault (and to be fair, this situation was not their "fault", i.e. that their government prefers to equip Canadian flyers with obsolete junk like the 1950's-vintage AIM-7 Sparrow). In other words, yes, the Canadians won the competition--but they were allowed to skip the toughest part of the actual shooting. All in all, though, they're a fine group of pilots, and fun to have around in the squadron bar at the end of the day... Well, if Dan is any indication of Canadians, I have no doubts about their drinking abilities. Interesting to know, however, just how Ottawa-hamstrung their pilots are. I mean, AIM-7? Those things are rear-aspect only shots, aren't they? (No jokes, please.) I'm hoping to hear more from Mr. Collier, because he works F-22 ops support. I'm of the opinion that the Raptor is not much more than a gold-plated F-15, and that the real future lies in the F-35. I'm sure Will will respond to this challenge! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Triangulate THIS Dick Morris thinks PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 02:18:05 PM ----- BODY: Triangulate THIS Dick Morris thinks we have plenty of time to waste playing Cross This Line with Saddam -- just so we can "prove" to "our allies" that there's a "need" to invade Iraq. Well. The Rallying Point says this Fox News story proves that we can't waste time with diplomatic niceties or French hand holding. Hussein's bounty for dead Israelis is now a cool 25 grand per suicide bomber. That can't be allowed to go on. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Like Me. You Really PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 02:43:29 PM ----- BODY: You Like Me. You Really Like Me So the hit meter has been up a tic today. I figured it was just a post-Lileks hangover. Residuals -- you know, the way Hasselhof still makes money off Baywatch reruns in Thailand. I checked the stats and I was getting more-than-residual hits from the Prof, who also mentioned this site last Friday. But I'd just read the afternoon edition of InstaPundit, and there was no new link. There was however, my name on his blogroll. Near the top. I am deeply flattered, Glenn. I owe ya a beer or three. PS This does not mean I'm giving up my quixotic Sullivan Crusade. There's no such thing as a bad joke I can't repeat endlessly. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The RSVP Is In the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 02:48:43 PM ----- BODY: The RSVP Is In the Mail I don't put much stock in Debka either, but Martin Devon's post goes a long way towards explaining all the sudden no-shows at the Arab League Summit. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Read THIS This afternoon's Required PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 02:52:06 PM ----- BODY: Read THIS This afternoon's Required Reading is Nat Henthoff's takedown of the Senate Judiciary Committee. When the Senate Judiciary Committee killed the presidential nomination of judge Charles Pickering to the Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals by a strict party-line 10-9 vote, Chairman Patrick Leahy, a Vermont Democrat, said triumphantly: "We have made the Constitution, work and we have made this committee work." I challenge Sen. Leahy to find in the Constitution, in James Madison's notes on the debates as the Constitution was being written, and in the Federalist Papers, any justification for allowing a single committee, no matter which party is in the majority, to veto a federal judicial nomination. Article II, Section 2 of the Constitution says clearly that the president shall nominate judges "with the advice and consent of the Senate." There is no footnote giving the final authority to the Judiciary Committee. Its veto power is the result of Senate rule. A constitutional amendment is not required to change that rule. All it requires is enough senators who believe in a process that is democratic. And that vote has about as much chance of getting out of committee as Pickering's nomination. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Is What the Web PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 03:14:52 PM ----- BODY: This Is What the Web Can Do Sarge and Hawk Girl both linked to this, and soon everyone else will, too. I don't care if you're not a fan of military history, you need to read it. I'm not even going to tell you what it is, just that you need to click here. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I'd Like To Smack the PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 03:21:01 PM ----- BODY: I'd Like To Smack the Academy I didn't watch the Oscars, don't care about the Oscars, wasn't going to write squat about the Oscars. But then John Podhoretz slams the ceremony and boosts Sidney Poitier, both beautifully: In a magnificent speech that was the highlight of the otherwise-unspeakable ceremony, Poitier himself paid a powerful and modest tribute to the directors, producers and studio heads who made history by casting him in the films that made him a star. They were all white. So is Poitier's wife Joanna. Poitier had two daughters with Joanna, who are therefore both black and white. He is an integrationist not only professionally, but personally. For him to be seen as an inspiration only to black people is to ghettoize an extraordinary man who simply refused to accept the limits of race. There you have it. Hell, by July I'll be darker than Halle Berry -- and yet Hollywood finally rewards her. . .for her role as a death row inmate's wife. That's not triumph, that's tragedy. And those multiculturalists on the Left Coast should know better. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: And How About Some Free PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 08:11:30 PM ----- BODY: And How About Some Free Press While You're At It? China -- again -- demands we stop messing with their "internal affairs." OK, fine, great. But first quit killing your kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Too Damn Many Davids The PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 08:14:08 PM ----- BODY: Too Damn Many Davids The header is a long story -- don't ask. But do ask me why the hell I kept forgetting to link to David's Rave & Rant & Whimsy. Apparently, he and I are the only two people on earth still Watching Ellie And sadly, not for much longer. Anyway, you'll find David in the After Work Cocktails. It's about time to have one here at the VodkaCondo. UPDATE: That'll be the last new link for a bit, while I get things a bit re-organized. Like spelling, organization is not my forté. Bear with me, kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tonight's Assignment David Warren has PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 08:26:56 PM ----- BODY: Tonight's Assignment David Warren has posted another Essay. He takes a harder look at last week's column on what to do about Arafat. The key graf is way down towards the end: The problem for the Bush administration, is that while it makes contingency plans for an unavoidable regime change in Iraq, it becomes increasingly aware that Saddam Hussein is no longer isolated; that there is a real risk the Americans could find themselves fighting, alongside Israel and Turkey, against all of their common enemies in the region, simultaneously. But given the constant development of weapons of mass destruction in each of these enemy states, and the constant stoking of Islamist fires, such a war might better be fought sooner than later. I thought calling the Current Mess "World War IV" was a bit of cute hyperbole, designed to remind us that this Mess is no joke. Now I'm starting to think WWIV is no joke. At what point in the fighting did they start calling it World War II? When the Germans invaded Russia? I really don't know. If anyone does or finds out, please get back to me via email or the Drinks section. I do know, however, that you need to read Warren right the hell now. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Was the Snippy Clothes PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/26/2002 08:57:40 PM ----- BODY: He Was the Snippy Clothes Salesman In Pretty Woman Larry Miller, whose Hollywood career may be over now that he's been outed as a libertarian, has a funny new column in The Weekly Standard. I don't usually bother with Will Kristol and his "National Greatness" cohorts, but anyone who publishes Miller is OK in my book. Or in Kristol's case, OK until the next time he opens his mouth. So go read Miller already. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Too Mad To Spit I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 12:09:31 AM ----- BODY: Too Mad To Spit I could forgive Nick Kristof for saying we have to give constitutional niceties to barbarian thugs in nations with no constitutions -- he's too stupid to know better. Sure, I savaged him for it, but it’s not like I ever had to treat him seriously. But, when 24 hours later, Tom Friedman says the exact same thing, three thoughts come to mind: 1) Friedman has taken leave of his senses. 2) There’s an odd anti-war conspiracy going on in the editorial office of The New York Times 3) Maybe Kristof was on to something. Of course, I’m kidding about that last one. I’m betting on a combo of the first two. Read Friedman’s latest crap: Yes, when you open up such closed societies, crazy things do fly out, like bats from a dungeon. Look at Poland and Russia, where two of the first bats out were rabid ultra-nationalist presidential candidates, Stanislaw Tyminski and Vladimir Zhirinovsky. But after a few seasons of democracy both are now long gone. When given a real choice, people usually don't want to be ruled by jerks. I have but one thing to say. Ohmyfuckinggod. OK, here’s one more thing I have to say. Friedman has lost it. He’s willing to give the benefit of the doubt to politically immature nations, like Egypt, whose only saving grace is leadership more afraid of us than of their own citizens. In a free election, Egyptian voters would get to choose between Candidate A, who promises to arm the Palestinians until they kill all the Jews, and Candidate B, who promises to do the job himself. Take a really radicalized -- and really rich -- nation like Saudi, and the results would be even more disastrous. Sure, these transitions are tricky. They can go wrong. See Serbia. But it's a worthwhile risk. Because context matters. Change the context of how people live and you change everything. And the current Arab context sure isn't working in our favor. Just read the newspapers. That’s awful big of you to admit, Tom. Golly, just think, we could turn over entire nation-states to frothing-at-the-mouth bigots, nutjobs, and anti-Americans looking to build nukes – and Friedman thinks that “a worthwhile risk.” Voting is a right of all Americans. Once they turn 18. We don't let kids drive until they're at least 16. And it's still illegal for me to get college coed sophomores drunk. Why? Because they aren't mature enough to handle the responsibilities. I would loved to have taken out my mom's old Karmen Ghia convertable for a spin back in '74, but she would have been guilty of reckless endangerment for giving the keys to a five-year-old. Now Tom Friedman wants to give the keys to the 'Vette, a bottle of whisky, and a handgun to a 15-year-old virgin with resentment issues, a bad temper, and a dreadful sense of fatalism. Feel safe on the streets now? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Michael Lonie EMAIL: loniem@dnc.net IP: 65.173.253.121 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 07:11:26 PM When the occupation authorities were trying to reintroduce the Germans to democracy after WWII one of the policies they set was that no right-wing extremist parties would be allowed to participate in elections. If, hypothetically, we were trying to teach the Iraqis to rule themselves during a prolonged American occupation we would be well with our rights to ban participation by Islamic Fundie parties and the Ba'ath, as being the sickos who got the Iraqis into their parlous condition in the first place and, oh yes, pissed us off but good. The basic requirement is that we should whip their asses so thoroughly that they will be in no doubt, no matter what fantasies may arise in their minds, that the US won overwhelmingly ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In The Guardian Remember PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 12:19:10 AM ----- BODY: Only In The Guardian Remember this name: Suzanne Goldenberg. This is only my third full installment of OITG, but it's her second mention. She's a reporter based in Israel, and pretty out there even for a eurolefty. She is, I think, one of those disturbing self-loathing Jews whose first reaction to anti-Semitism is "Thank you, sir, may I have another?" Read this lede from her report on the Arab League summit in Beirut: A defiant Yasser Arafat declared that he would not attend today's Arab League summit in Beirut, virtually guaranteeing that the Palestinian cause will dominate the gathering of regional leaders. My, how virile she makes Yasser seem. He's "defiant" and "will dominate." Pretty loaded language -- and this is a "straight" news story, not an opinion piece. Aides for Mr Arafat announced the decision in Ramallah last night, saying that the Palestinian leader would not bow to the ever-toughening conditions of Israel's prime minister, Ariel Sharon, for his attendance at the event. That's tough old nut will "not bow" to "ever-toughening conditions." He's a martyr, you see, willing to suffer for the cause. Unmentioned is that "the cause" is killing as many women and children as he can, until the few surviving Jews flee the Middle East. Only in The Guardian, kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jim Naso EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 64.12.102.37 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 10:13:10 AM If only it were "Only in the Guardian." This type of tendentious reporting has become the norm rather than the exception. If it were not so, there would hardly be much point in you bloggers and we readers trying to dissect the news. Good site. Regards. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Now Go Away Or I PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 12:30:56 AM ----- BODY: Now Go Away Or I Shall Be Forced To Taunt You a Second Taaaaaahm David Broder has a new column today, but I couldn't get much past the header. "Europe's Fury." You see, even good guy Europeans, like the Germans, are mad at President Bush over the whole Iraq thing, so maybe we should listen to the Lilliputian Limp Wrists this time. Anyway, I'd have some biting criticism for you, but that headline just undoes me. When I think of "Europe's fury," all I can picture is little skinny men throwing cheese from behind some rocks at the entire 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment and shouting, "No fair, we haven't built an army yet!" All this, of course, in a French accent of the Cleese region. NOTE: I also claim dibs on the phrase "Lilliputian Limp Wrists." Not as succinct as "EUnuchs," but it flows better and is less likely to be confused with an operating system. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: For Music I Still Prefer PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 12:41:56 AM ----- BODY: For Music I Still Prefer George Clinton You don't see much Clinton-bashing in this space. He was certainly the most corrupt president of the 20th Century, but we were lucky enough to have elected him at a time when we could afford the distraction, more or less. Yet I still found today's Michael Kelly column compelling. It is, in part, a write-up of the new Joe "Anonymous" Klein book on Clinton, called "The Natural: The Misunderstood Presidency of Bill Clinton." But there is a common theme, which has to do with the quality that, in the end, made Clinton a most unusual president. It is not, Klein's valiant efforts notwithstanding, a positive quality. What comes across as the most important source of Clinton's uniqueness as president is the nearly unbelievable degree of his essential unfitness to be president -- his profound immaturity, his pathological selfishness, his cynicism, above all his relentless corruption. In Klein's defense, Clinton emerges almost casually as "the apotheosis of his generation's alleged sins: the moral relativism, the tendency to pay more attention to marketing than to substance, the solipsistic callowness," possessed of an "angry, adolescent side," given to "almost hilarious self-involvement" and "childishness," "a man who would actually poll whether or not he should tell the truth" and who suffered from "moral turpitude," "a compendium of all that his accusers found most embarrassing, troubling and loathsome about themselves." Klein finds it plausible that Clinton ordered up lethal bombings in Sudan and Afghanistan "to turn the nation's attention away from the Lewinsky scandal." This, mind you, in defense. Interesting stuff about -- love him or hate him -- an interesting man. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: jim naso EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 64.12.102.38 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 11:18:59 AM "...love hime or loathe him -- an interesting man." The word "interesting" has become such a versatile tool in our time. We no longer flinch from anything, no matter how intrinsically repulsive, so long as it is interesting. That makes it worthy of our close study. A pile of shit on a dinner plate put in an art gallery would generate a thousand times more "public discourse" than the discovery of a hitherto unknown Vermeer. The plate of shit is "interesting." Actually, it's a lot more than that. And in other respects, a lot less. In a society that is no longer willing to share much in the way of common values -- especially a commitment to the truth as best as we can discern it -- interesting has become seemingly the only common value. It's no surprise to me that a society obsessed with interesting things is increasingly in the thrall of an army of hucksters and panderers. The Clinton portrayed in those two paragraphs is a human piece of garbage. Anyone who loves that Clinton must necessarily deny the facts behind that characterization. That is, unless we have, in fact, reached the point where we are now willing to say that it's a legitimate position to love a man who put more effort into getting around his marriage vows and his presidential oath than in trying to reign in his proclivity for lying and cheating, a man who is very likely guilty of both rape and sexual assault, a man who may have gone so far as to order the killing of innocent civilians just for ratings. My, how interesting. I keep hearing about Clinton being "larger than life." I increasingly find him to be smaller and smaller. Guys like Clinton are all over the place. It's the guy who evades prosecution for drunken driving because he knows the police chief. The guy who shreds paperwork so that his screw-up can't be traced. The guy who fires the secretary that won't go to bed with him. The guy who makes anonymous threats to the woman who jilted him. What is "interesting" to me is how such a puny man became the President of the United States. I find the true measure of Clinton in a small detail that came out before he was elected. He and Hillary put exorbitant values on the used underwear and hosiery that they gave to the Goodwill, just to save a few pennies on taxes. This is the stuff Presidents are made of? And loved for? God help us! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 03:00:20 PM Have a cocktail, Jim. Or three. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: jim naso EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 205.188.192.178 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:00:22 AM Being a holiday and all, I had a cocktail. Or four or five. It mellowed me out a bit, but I still despise Clinton and the people who love him. I'm not a Pollyanna who expects politicians to be moral paragons. Still, I didn't expect the standard to be set so low. Regards. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Sullivan Crusade The Ongoing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 12:59:17 AM ----- BODY: The Sullivan Crusade The Ongoing Adventures of a Straight Man Trying to Get Noticed By a Powerful Gay Man Instead of the usual jokes about sucking up for a mention, I'd instead like to ask a different favor. Andrew, now that you've noticed and mentioned two of our best bloggers -- Pejman and Asparagirl -- you need to blogroll them on your Links page. It's true that Pejman is as rabid a first-generation American as I ever hope to buy a drink for. And, yes, Asparagirl writes as well as any of the pros. I'm glad you've told the world what so many in the blogosphere already knew. Pejman writes just as fast and much more furiously than even the Instantman. Asp can get words under the skin even better than you can -- and that's saying something. So give them their due. Put them on your links page. Thank you. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Don't Let Him Be Right. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 01:13:25 AM ----- BODY: Don't Let Him Be Right. You Wouldn't Like Him When He's Right More evidence that the VodkaPundit is a financial genius. Or at least a good guesser. USA Today reports consumer confidence took its biggest jump in 11 years in February. Over three weeks ago, I predicted 3.5-4.0% growth in the economy this year. That's starting to sound less bold with each new piece of data we get. Barring an severe oil shock or nuclear, biologicial, or effective chemical terrorist attack, I don't think anything can stop the economy from the top end. We'll talk again in ten months when the 2002 figures are final ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Already Know Drugs and PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 01:16:02 AM ----- BODY: We Already Know Drugs and Smoking and Sex and Anything Fun Are All Bad For Us Apparently, Bush picked a new Surgeon General. Um. . .why do we still have one of those? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Michael Lonie EMAIL: loniem@dnc.net IP: 65.173.253.121 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 06:57:32 PM Can you say "sinecure to pay off political debts" boys and girls? I knew you could. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Cats Voted to Bell PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 01:28:36 AM ----- BODY: The Cats Voted to Bell the Mouse No surprises here -- the Arab League put out a formal statement condemning Israel, praising the barbarian Intifada, and giving Praise Unto Allah for being such a nasty fucker lately. So I made up that last part. Sue me. What does come as a surprise is reading this line in the Washington Times: The absence of both [Mubarak and Arafat] came as a blow to summit efforts to address Israeli-Palestinian fighting. What blows here is the writer taking seriously Arab League efforts to address the "fighting" at all. If the League had the Palestinian's best interests at heart, they would tell them to lay down their arms and come to a workable peace agreement, pronto. But from Iraq to Morocco, the Palestinians are seen as useful idiots. Good for killing Jews and keeping a tiny semblance of cohesion in the Arab world. The whole meeting was a sham designed for no purpose other than to hide those facts. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Talk About Burying the Lede PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 01:41:22 AM ----- BODY: Talk About Burying the Lede Kudos to the Times for daring to put the truth in a headline! I'd been ignoring the story of the slaughter in Paris yesterday. Hell, I almost never read about the ones in Israel anymore. The details are depressing in their unimportance, and just plain depressing. Some nut with a gun and an agenda and a deathwish. But cruising through the Times, I actually stopped to read the story. CNN buried the one essential fact in the eighth graf. Canada.com was better, putting it in the third paragraph. Ha'aretz saved it for the fourth. The New York Times didn't see fit to mention it at all. What am I talking about, you ask? The shooter was an activist in the local Green Party. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: President Who? Pete du Pont PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 01:55:10 AM ----- BODY: President Who? Pete du Pont -- who I cast my very first vote for in the 1988 Presidential Primaries -- is just now discovering lying and deceit in the US Forest Service. It's a well-written, well-argued piece, really. It just seems so dated. The blogosphere trapped, skinned, butchered, grilled, ate, digested, and shat out that issue just about ever ago. Still, du Pont puts a lot of good data together in a nicely-sized package. It's still worth a read if you're looking for more intellectual ammunition. NOTE: I'm wasn't kidding about the '88 primary. I was 19, a fierce little Randian, and willing to do anything for a candidate in favor both privatizing Social Security and a flat tax. I'm no longer such the Objectivist, but I could still sure go for a President like that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Michael Lonie EMAIL: loniem@dnc.net IP: 65.173.253.121 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 06:53:47 PM I've never been a Libertarian but I long ago went for a flat rate income tax and Social Security Privatization. Jimmy Carter was still President then. The '90s were the best time for Social Security reform but the leftists among the Democrats (Bill Clinton in the lead) decided they did not want to do so. I hope they have really good speeches prepared to explain to all those voters why they didn't do anything before the system collapsed. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Have Some Coffee Before Reading PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 02:07:14 AM ----- BODY: Have Some Coffee Before Reading This Post Arlen Specter wants you to adopt a frozen embryo. I know the anti-abortion crowd can get a little creepy, but that one really made my skin crawl. Ronald Bailey has the whole story over at Reason. My immediate thoughts about adopting a frozen embryo are: 1) I'm going to need a faster ice-maker. 2) I'll gain practical experience for my cryogenic freezing in 2050. 3) Are people against this called anti-freeze? 4) You can make jokes about frozen embryo adoption, but it's still really creepy. 5) Arlen Specter needs to be hit upside the head with a brick with the words "There's a war on" etched into it. Your thoughts? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Real Old Testement Justice Two PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 02:11:09 AM ----- BODY: Real Old Testement Justice Two Palestinian barbarians accidentally blew themselves up at a roadblock yesterday, before they could get near civilians. There's an old saw that wars aren't won by the most competent army; they're won by the least incompetent army. Obviously, we have nothing to fear from the outcome in this fight. All we need to win is the political will. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Best. Screed. Ever. You know PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 03:05:31 AM ----- BODY: Best. Screed. Ever. You know what to do. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All Pain All the Time PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 11:44:07 AM ----- BODY: All Pain All the Time I didn't realize just how hooked I'd gotten on the Comments until YACCS took them away. Stacy, my Web Administratrix, was right when she said they're as additcting as crack. I'm curled up in the fetal position, shaking violently, somehow managing to type. Giving up cigarettes was easier. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Only Hurt the Ones PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 11:54:33 AM ----- BODY: You Only Hurt the Ones You Love. Did I Say "Love?" I Meant "Hate" Reuters (Motto: "One Man's Wire Service Is Another Man's Impacted Toenail") reports chaos at the Arab League summit in Beirut. PA Barbarian-in-Chief Yasser Arafat is miffed and all snippy because a satellite speech of his wasn't inflicted on, er, broadcast to the entire Arab world. "This is an Arab summit, not a Lebanon summit," Kaddoumi added. "The summit is for all the Arabs and for the (Palestinian) Intifada and he (Lahoud) has no right not to listen to the Palestinian speech." Unless, of course, those Arabs happen to be Christian, Druze, Sufi, or Jewish. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Also, It Smells Like a PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 12:01:01 PM ----- BODY: Also, It Smells Like a Wet Dog The new NRO design may be sloppy and confusing, but at least it's ugly as hell. What hath Jonah wrought? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sean McCray EMAIL: seanmccray@hotmail.com IP: 172.159.161.234 URL: http://nextright.blogspot.com DATE: 03/28/2002 12:50:20 AM It is a horrible redesign. Who got paid for this? ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tom Clancy Drool Fest StrategyPage PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 12:11:59 PM ----- BODY: Tom Clancy Drool Fest StrategyPage announces that the JSOW is tanned, rested, and ready to bomb. You might not have heard about the AGM-154A, but trust me when I say it's very, very cool. Better yet, trust these guys. They'll give you the whole scoop. But I'll sum up the -B variant for you right here. Imagine a single bomb able to take out an entire company of camouflaged enemy armor, near simultaneously -- yet the pilot never has to get any closer than 15 miles. Told you it was cool. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today's Required Reading I was PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 03:17:59 PM ----- BODY: Today's Required Reading I was going to get on my CFR high horse again, but Robert Samuelson beat me to it. After his column, nothing more needs to be said -- outside of court challenges, that is. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Can't We Send Him Back PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 03:32:21 PM ----- BODY: Can't We Send Him Back To Canada? Because I enjoy a cruel laugh (out of a sense of sadism or out of masochism -- probably the former), I subscribed yesterday to Peter Jennings' daily email note. Here's the lede from this afternoon's update: Peter Jennings will report from the Arab League summit in Beirut, Lebanon, where there is a growing sense that, despite all the wrangling, almost every Arab country is prepared to have normal relations someday with Israel. While the Arab League was meeting, a Palestinian suicide bomber blew himself up in an Israeli beach town, killing more than a dozen people on the first night of Passover. Please tell me I'm not the only one who noticed the disconnect between the first and second sentence. There's not even an implied sense of detached irony. Let's re-write that story in family terms everyone can understand: "Tonight during the Green Household Chores Meeting, a long discussion led to the virtually unanimous agreement that Steve should take out the trash. In an unrelated story, Steve threw garbage all over the kitchen and took a dump on the dining room table during dinner." Might I suggest the Vietnam solution to saving network news? You know, that "we saved the village by destroying it" technique. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Maggie EMAIL: talking_of_michelangelo@hotmail.com IP: 141.225.14.58 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 08:38:50 AM That's the reason why I've been hanging around the "conservative" websites the past few weeks. I'm currently more in tune with their thoughts on the Middle East than those of the liberalized freaks at the NYTimes and the jerk-offs at CNN. Have you looked at Best of the Web lately? The columns they link to usually cheer me up a little bit. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Glenn Mattie EMAIL: gmattie@hfx.eastlink.ca IP: 24.222.149.192 URL: DATE: 03/30/2002 01:00:27 AM Hey, we don't want Peter or people of his ilk back in Canada. We have quite enough lefties already, thank you. That's a problem for a great country like the USA, you get alot of Canadian talent -say Mike Myers and Pamela Anderson- but you have to put up with imported trash as well. Hey, that brings up a thought - the US shouldn't be placing tariffs on softwood lumber and steel etc., but I think maybe Canada and other countries should have tariffs imposed on us when one of our 'enlightened' lefties moves to the US to work. Talk about 'illegal' dumping. Thanks for the great blog. Glenn Mattie Halifax, Nova Scotia ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Your Attention Please PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 03:52:49 PM ----- BODY: At least 16 are dead in another suicide bombing attack, this time at a hotel Passover Seder. I'm sick of telling Israel to negotiate. I'm sick of tit-for-tat "cycle of violence" body count news stories. I'm sick of war without end. I'm sick of women and children being killed for being women and children. I'm sick of seeing newly-made orphans. I'm sick of the vicious-child mindset of every Palestinian leader. I'm sick of young men ending their lives in an unholy struggle. I'm sick of Arab pretensions. I'm sick of cowardice called martyrdom. I'm sick of knowing I can't visit half my family's ancestral home without fear. I'm sick of those who teach murderous hatred to children. I'm sick of failures who want to take us down with them. I'm sick of lies and duplicity used in the name of justice. I'm sick of beautiful young girls slaughtered for their religion. I'm sick of bounties for dead civilians. I'm sick of our diplomats being jerked around. I'm sick of the Israeli people having to hold back their fury and their tears. I'm sick of the lying Palestinian media. I'm sick of the biased American media. I'm sick of loser barbarians who try to dictate peace terms. I'm sick of accommodating our destroyers. I'm sick of being made to look like fools, by fools. I'm sick of hating to read the news. I'm sick of arguing with irrational beasts. I'm sick of crying. Mostly, I'm just sick to death of the senseless, bloody idiocy. But there is no end in sight. There is no persuading men who don't hold to reason. There is no coexistence. There will be no peace. The time has come for Israel to expel every single last Palestinian from the West Bank. If they so much as squawk, then those in Gaza should be expelled, too. They can flee to Jordon, or Syria, or Egypt, or to Lebanon. I don't care where they go. Frankly, they can go to hell. NOTE: I'm sorry the comments section isn't working today. If you want to damn or praise me, just send email. I probably won't post much more for a while. I just don't feel like being witty and flippant right now. ANOTHER NOTE: OK, the comments are working again. Click on the Drinks and let's see what happens. But I can tell you two things: 1) I've never received so much email, and 2) Not one has been in disagreement. Be very afraid of the American street. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 01:06:18 AM If you're looking for the comments everyone contributed yesterday, then click here. If the HTML code doesn't work in the new comments, then go to the top post on the site today, or cut'n'paste this URL -- http://rateyourmusic.com/yaccs/commentso?blog_id=90000002080&blog_entry_id=11188952 ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sekimori EMAIL: stacy@sekimori.com IP: 65.32.139.47 URL: http://www.sekimori.com/weblog.html DATE: 03/28/2002 01:22:12 AM I told you, Stephen, three weeks ago, was it? Extermination is the only solution for an infestation of rats. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dale Felber EMAIL: dalefelber@yahoo.com IP: 65.101.132.172 URL: http://www.businessbay.com DATE: 03/28/2002 01:45:00 AM I agree that extermination is the solution. However, is it possible from a democracy? If it is not, then I think that it will be the end to democracy. Islamic law will rule. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dave EMAIL: dtepper@davetepper.net IP: 66.61.27.58 URL: http://www.davetepper.net DATE: 03/28/2002 03:50:39 AM Worst part are the Pollyannas who keep telling me, "You can't do anything about terrorism, so relax." Flight 93, people. And I don't WANT to relax. Of course, none of those messages have come from any large city, so I just decided to be charitable and figure they meant well but were clueless. Fewer ulcers that way. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Steve Parsons EMAIL: steven.parsons@parexel.com IP: 12.107.198.34 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 06:24:24 AM I doubt that a Western-style democracy like Israel would be able to go the extermination route--at least I *hope* not. Stephen is right...it's time for wholesale expulsion of Palestinians from Israel followed by locking the borders down tight. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ricky EMAIL: surfadelic23@aol.com IP: 198.199.226.254 URL: http://shortattention.blogspot.com/ DATE: 03/28/2002 06:46:23 AM Well, you did better than me. I really couldn't write on this one. The shock and senselessness just left me drained. I hope your screed provided you with some catharsis and release from a fucked up world. Fight the good fight, man! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Maggie EMAIL: talking_of_michelangelo@hotmail.com IP: 141.225.14.58 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 08:30:03 AM Seder at my fiance's house last night. There's an Israeli friend of the family staying for the week. She's from Netanya. We were, more or less, numb. My fiance's father is a cantor, so, being clergy, he reminded us that we are commanded, even at times of hideous, nightmarish suffering, to "celebrate" the seder. We tried. But in the back of my head was this...scream. This morning, it's even louder. I want them gone. I want them out of my homeland. Let the high-and-mighty Arab states absorb them. They should be happy to receive such willing, fanatic converts to the Wahhabi cause. Tonight an Israeli couple who teach at the local Schechter school are coming over as well, in addition to various other synagogue members. I do not know how I'm going to make it through tonight. I just do not know. Passover Massacre. Worse, possibly, is that so many people don't know or don't care. Too caught up in the daily mundane. But when I stop them, and tell them, exactly what happened.... The pause. The "my dear God". I hope we grind them into the sand dunes. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Tim Koruna EMAIL: tim@koruna.net IP: 12.20.122.76 URL: http://www.koruna.net DATE: 03/28/2002 08:45:18 AM In regards to Sekimori's question above, "I agree that extermination is the solution. However, is it possible from a democracy? ", I'll quote Glenn Reynolds: "... I remember Walter Russell Mead writing a piece last fall noting that the only opponent to kill American women and children in significant numbers was the American Indian, and that the response was near-extermination (since many of those were my ancestors being exterminated, I'm not necessarily approving this, but that's neither here nor there at the moment). He predicted that this would be the American response to Islamic terror if it weren't contained early. I think he's right. ..." (from his 03/05/2002 postings) He was writing specifically about the US, but I think this applies, as well, to the democracy in Israel which has proven over the last century to be very adept at warfare. There's a tipping point coming, or perhaps just yesterday it came, at which point the mass of the Israeli populace will say "No More". When that happens I suspect that, yes, the Israelis will find it in themselves to vanquish their foes utterly. They have no alternative. Democracies wage savage warfare, made more savage by their superior technology and the indomitable morale of free citizens. If it becomes clear that the only alternatives for a democracy are a) let your kids and their kids be killed by a society of suicidal murderers or b) obliterate that society, choice "b" will be embraced by a substantial majority of the democracy's population. Once that decision is reached, the conclusion is foregone: the democracy will utterly destroy their foe. I sure as hell hope the Israelis do. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 206.146.129.38 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 03/28/2002 08:56:17 AM sekimori already said it best. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: k.s.p. EMAIL: kenpl@juno.com IP: 207.215.153.175 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 09:17:54 AM The Palestinians may once have been members of the human race. Their leadership may continue to claim membership. However, actions speak louder than words. They have "burned" their membership cards and should be treated accordingly. They have proven, far beyond ANY (let alone reasonable) doubt that there is no solution other than military. The sooner decisive action is taken the fewer the innocent casualities. Arab armies have proven themselves effective against unarmed civilians, they can fight other Arab armies to a draw but if Israel pulls no punches it could all be over in less time than the Six Day War. KSP ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Teri Pittman EMAIL: tpittman@xws.com IP: 209.210.3.92 URL: http://www.xws.com/terispage/ DATE: 03/28/2002 10:24:51 AM I remember a discussion with an Israeli on a mailing list. He talked about how desperately they had wanted peace to work, how upset they were at the bias against them in American media. I talked about how America had to act in its own interest. It's clear that the latest violence has driven out all doubt on the American side. Let the Arabs take in their Palestinian brothers. Push every last one of them out of the country. They do not deserve the benefits of civilization. I have no sympathy for their plight any more. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 192.189.236.20 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 10:28:43 AM FWIW, I absolutely agree with your initial post, and the with overwhelming majority of sentiments expressed subsequently. I think that what too many in the democracies have failed to do is to recognize alternative viewpoints. By that, I mean that, living in a democracy with a civil discourse based on the exchange of ideas, we have forgotten that there ARE people out there, societies out there, that believe that the best solution is to kill, to maim, ultimately to exterminate. A mere fifty years, and we have forgotten that there IS evil. At the same time, though, I am a little disturbed by some of the sentiments expressed, particularly those that argue that the Palestinians are subhuman. Their actions are EVIL, UNJUSTIFIABLE. There is no interest, on my part, in "understanding" or exploring "root causes." As I think Mayor Giuliani noted, "I can feel compassion for someone, and still justify the death penalty for them." But it is important to recognize that the actions are undertaken by people---not animals, not caricatures. The Nazis were people, the Communists were people. It doesn't require a specific uniform, a particular time-period, to be able to perpetrate great evil. It just requires ideology, and a willingness to be susceptible to it. Sorry for the rambling. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Myria EMAIL: myria@mindspring.com IP: 63.214.98.186 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 11:13:40 AM For a long time the Israelis scared me. They were sitting on top of a powder keg and they were just crazy enough to light it. The Palestinians had their beefs and some of them were even legitimate even if their end goals were unacceptable and their technique for trying to get there were disgusting and criminal. There had to be some sort of compromise, some sort of way the two sides could learn to live together in relative peace. There were fits and starts, seeming progress that made it seem like peace was attainable - just over the horizon, if only everyone could keep their cool. Over the last year it has become more and more clear that it was all lies, tricks, and treachery. Arafat stood up and renounced terrorism, renounced violence, but it was all a lie. The terrorism and violence continued. Clinton, in his desperation for a "legacy", tried to force a compromise down the Israelis' throats that was nearly suicidal for them and would have giving Arafat nearly everything he claimed to want. He balked, turned it down flat. Arafat didn't want compromise, he didn't want peace. He would say all the right things, all the nice words, to the Western press, and then go home and tell his own people how they were going to drive the Israelis into the sea. Which was the "real" Arafat, the peacemaker or the genocidal maniac, became abundantly clear by his actions - his words mean nothing. Then came September 11th and the Palestinians dancing in the street with joy as 3,000 of our fellow citizens were murdered. Oh, we didn't really mean it, says Arafat. Like hell you didn't. Suddenly Americans are paying attention, time to bring out the pretty words again. Bush wanted the two sides to sit down. The Israelis demanded a week - one fucking week! - of peace. One week without their citizens getting their guts splattered all over concrete because some nutjob is in a hurry to see Allah. Is that so much to ask? Apparently it is because Arafat couldn't or wouldn't deliver. Another bomb goes off, more people killed, and Saddam and Arafat start writing checks to the survivors of the nutjob who blew themselves up. How many does that make? Can anyone even keep count anymore? This has to stop. There is no compromise with people whose only end goal is your death and destruction. The only thing you can do is kill them before they kill you. Whatever the Palestinian's beef, it's irrelevant now. There is no moral high ground here, only the pit to hell the Palestinians are busy digging for themselves. Time to fill it in with extreme prejudice. We should not only tell the Israelis to go ahead an light the powder keg if they feel they have to, we should encourage them to do it and get it over with. We should hand them the match. Here, here's a few hellfire missiles, go turn Arafat and his cronies rocket shish kabobs and spread their carbonized atoms from here to hell and back. Hamas? I think we've got a few extra thermobarics around here somewhere, want 'em? Enough is enough, and there's been more than enough. Untie that arm behind your back, Israel, and get this over with. It's long since time to put this game of bloody water torture to an end once and for all. The rest of the Arab world wants to go to war with you over this? Fine, we'll be there. We're going to have to fight most of 'em any damn way. House of Saud? It was real, it was nice, but it wasn't real nice - buh-bye. Saddam? Put your finger near the trigger of a WMD and your country becomes a radioactive parking lot. Iran? Your Mullahs have a choice between exile on the French Riviera or death, we don't care which. Start on the West Bank and work our way out. If they want war, give it to them but don't let them get away with a little bomb here, an airplane into a building there, and then we'll wait until things calm down a little before deciding to start it all again bigger and worse than before. It has to end, we can't let it go on. This has just gone too far and we have to do something. They play these games because they're afraid of all out war, they know they'll lose and lose badly. We can't let these murderers continue to get away with it. They have sown, it's time for some reaping. Sorry to rant and rave, but it's hard not to get worked up about it. Especially when you see these idiots on TV blathering about the "cycle of violence" and other such moral equivalence crap. When someone tries to kill you and you blow their head off before they can manage it that's not a "cycle of violence", that's justice. Myria ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Matt Harris EMAIL: matt_j_harris@yahoo.com IP: 24.55.0.208 URL: http://www.launchpadzero.net/ DATE: 03/28/2002 02:48:21 PM I agree pretty much 100% with the sentiments expressed here, and have for some time. While I have some sympathy for the Palestinians, most of their problems they have brought on themselves. I think it is time for the U.S. to get out of the "peace procress" and let Israel defend itself - we are doing more harm than good as it is. If Israel needs to drive the Palestinians into the sea in order to secure itself, then so be it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Matt Harris EMAIL: matt_j_harris@yahoo.com IP: 24.55.0.208 URL: http://www.launchpadzero.net/ DATE: 03/28/2002 02:48:22 PM I agree pretty much 100% with the sentiments expressed here, and have for some time. While I have some sympathy for the Palestinians, most of their problems they have brought on themselves. I think it is time for the U.S. to get out of the "peace procress" and let Israel defend itself - we are doing more harm than good as it is. If Israel needs to drive the Palestinians into the sea in order to secure itself, then so be it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: NELib EMAIL: Seajoe73@aol.com IP: 18.94.0.80 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 04:55:28 PM The Palestinians should be very worried. At one time, many people I know truly believed that Arafat and the Palestinians wanted to live peacefully with the Israelis. I don't know many people who believe this today. I'm located in Boston, MA. I've considered myself a liberal in many areas, and most of my friends and relatives would be classified as liberal also. (Being a liberal in Boston is kind of natural .. I think it's the air or water!!) I don't see much support for the 'Palestinian Peace Process' among people who have traditionally believed this was possible. What I *do* see support (growing support) for is for Israel to 'take the gloves off', with US support, and deal with the Palestinians militarily, in a large way. If I were a Palestinian, I'd worry about the 'US Street's' growing support for strong military action (like wiping them out). Enough is enough. Let's deal with the growing Islamofacist threat now and let's make the Palestinians one of the targets. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Richard Adams EMAIL: rdolivaw@hotmail.com IP: 205.188.201.148 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 07:00:56 PM Regarding the posibility of an "extermination" campaign, read "Culture and Carnage" by Victor Davis Hansen (sp). You may already have, but it's worth thinking about the history of democratic cultures when threatened. Ruthless efficiency is probably a good description. The examples Hansen uses are Thebes against Sparta in about 400BCE, Sherman's March to the Sea in the US Civil War, and the fire-bombing of Tokyo in WWII. Don't mess with a democracy -- not a paper tiger, but a "leave me the hell alone" tiger. Puts up with a modicum of poking, but eventually gets a good dinner from the poker, if he doesn't go away. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: BJ EMAIL: BeJayDiary@aol.com IP: 172.143.119.236 URL: http://bigjon.diaryland.com DATE: 03/28/2002 08:00:16 PM Mao put it best when he said that "The people are the water that the guerillia fish swins in". Time to drain the water out of the swamp, and use the resulting land to plant crops. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Nick H EMAIL: ngh77@hotmail.com IP: 195.92.67.68 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 12:10:13 PM These are terrible times and I'm convinced there's going to be a major war soon- in some ways more awful than the last. Possibly even longer-lasting: it is a terrifying prospect. A de-nazification programme is ultimately needed, and this can only happen after the Islamic world has suffered total military defeat and occupation by the West. That's all of us. I have read so many posts recently calling for 'extermination'. We are not them. We are not Nazis. We are not going to commit genocide. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Alex Bensky EMAIL: alexbensky@aol.com IP: 152.163.201.192 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 04:17:29 PM I assume the calls for "extermination" are hyperbole our unconsidered outrage. I'm not even sure the israelis can or should simply shove out the entire West Bank population. But I no longer feel qualified to have an opinion on how Israel should defend itself. They'll take action and the world will condemn them for it. On the other hand, the world will condemn them anyway. The only thing Israel could do to win back world sympathy is to commit suicide. The liberal churches would have memorial services every year, the Europeans would shed tears over the demise of this state that they'd suddenly decide was a gallant outpost of democracy after all. The media would be filled with stories of the heartache and desolation of the survivors as they struggled to make new lives after yet another scattering. Won't happen. No second holocaust this time. After all, Jews being the subject of mass oppribruim is not unprecedented. I don't know if I fully agree with the letter of Mr. Green's post, but with the spirit, I'm behind him all the way. By the way, I'd support Israel even if Vietnamese lived there. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Alex Bensky EMAIL: alexbensky@aol.com IP: 152.163.201.192 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 04:20:19 PM Sorry. I actuall can spell "opprobrium." And I meant "or unconsidered outrage." Apologies for not proofreading. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: David Chue EMAIL: dfchue452@yahoo.com IP: 213.122.116.171 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 04:57:21 PM Great of you to say 'even if the Vietnamese lived there'. Perhaps we are the lowest form of life? You can spell opprobrium; can you spell 'racist dirtbag'? Sounds like your version of nirvana includes a big dose of genocide. A Vietnamese-American. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Rick Johansen EMAIL: rickyij@y3zone.com IP: 213.122.116.171 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 05:35:02 PM You have got some really sick people here. Is this a gathering place for Nazis? I'm in the USAF, by the way. Goodbye. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: k EMAIL: kk@hotmail.com IP: 162.83.199.162 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 11:49:44 PM Isn't it interesting how the violence level in the mideast is correlated with Sharon's regime? Even though my kneejerk should be anti-Palestinian, my objective assessment is clearly that they've had the short end of the stick for way too long. Time for the Israelis to play or move out of Palestine, perhaps to Africa. BTW, I DO NOT condone civilian deaths, but I do blame Sharon's regime for provoking them. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Vendee EMAIL: vendee@lycosmail.com IP: 24.44.111.62 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:01:10 AM "provoking" them??[!!] ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Robert Schwartz EMAIL: rsscmh@usa.net IP: 65.24.154.84 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 07:20:35 AM Right On Dude! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: AW EMAIL: ApocalypseWatcher47@thecenter.zzn.com IP: 24.44.111.62 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 10:24:51 PM Mr. Green (and everyone else): Have you seen these? Better yet, can you able to prove these articles wrong (or deceitful)? http://jim.blogspot.com/?/2002_04_01_jim_archive.html#75052799 http://stommel.tamu.edu/%7Ebaum/ethel/2002_03_24_ethel-archive.html#11247894 ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: k EMAIL: kk@hotmail.com IP: 162.83.199.162 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 01:31:00 AM there is no rebuttal of these articles - they are right on ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Feeling Better PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/27/2002 06:15:12 PM ----- BODY: Boris Kupershmidt, who sends me tons of stuff every day, links to the perfect antidote for those West Bank Blues. Here's a tale of real heroism. Whenever I read stuff like this from WWII, I'm reminded of when I saw Saving Private Ryan the first time. Saw it on the big screen with the girl I was dating then, and we were both moved beyond words. So we crossed the street to an Appleby's or some other family chain restaurant, where we could sit and pretend to eat dinner while we got quietly drunk. A couple tables away, I recognized the woman who'd been sitting next to me in the theater. I took notice of her because she kept covering her face during the worst bits of movie carnage. Watching her after, gaily eating her meal, I just wanted to grab her by the shoulders and tell her, "If our grandfathers could do that, the very least we can do is watch it." I was just in total unbeleiving awe of how blithe a person can be, of how unaware we can stay of our surroundings if we only cover our faces. I really should have told her off when I had the chance. On a day like today, I don't think I'd hold back again. We'll be eating dinner at home tonight. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: John EMAIL: litljohn1971@yahoo.com IP: 63.42.242.201 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 01:45:01 AM I saw that movie in a theater, after it had been out for a while, while I was at Fort Bragg (82 ABN). There were maybe 5 of us in the seats, all with the not-air force-army! haircut. There are two 82nd paratroopers in that movie. They're the dead bodies in front of the radar site, where the medic gets killed during a (badly conducted) assault. Actually, a pretty accurate representation of what happened to the average paratrooper in Europe (2-300% casualties!!!) Anyway, the silence as the five of us left that theater will always remain with me. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Alley Writer EMAIL: AlleyWriter@alleywriter.com IP: 65.229.224.160 URL: http://alleywriter.blogspot.com DATE: 03/28/2002 10:05:24 AM I've never been very good at math, so can someone explain to me how a unit has 2-3 times as many men killed as are in the unit. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 192.189.236.20 URL: DATE: 03/28/2002 02:55:46 PM Alley Writer, Imagine you are in a squad (10 men). After X months, four of your people are dead. The rear area sends forward four replacements. Another X months go by, and three people are dead. Rear area sends forward three replacements. Over the course of the next several months, another four people are killed, to be, again, replaced. Then, in a really horrible day, nine of your squad-mates are killed. After the battle, they send up nine replacements. At this point, your squad of ten men has had twenty people pass through it, all killed. So, it's suffered 200% casualties (20 dead, 10 men in its nominal organization). ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Your Attention Just One More Time Please PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/28/2002 12:57:02 AM ----- BODY: Yesterday was quite a ride, kids. I’ve never seen such a flood of emails. I tried to respond with at least a few words to each of you, but if I missed you, it wasn’t neglect or for lack of trying. Bear with me. You might notice VodkaPundit is off of Blogger and onto Moveable Type. Thanks to Web Administratrix Stacy Tabb for suffering the headaches and getting the job done. You might also notice that the old comments couldn’t be transferred to the new system. Don’t worry – you can still read, and add to, yesterday’s huge volume by clicking here. Yesterday’s sad news from Israel, my response to it, and yours, taught me the meaning of the phrase “the world is too much with me.” As I’m sure you know, I was in quite a state yesterday. Words posted and emailed from Glenn, James, Em, Tim, Mike, Kathy, and too many others to mention kept me sane and let me know I’m not alone. I don’t remember who said it or where it comes from, but today it fits like custom shoes just broken in. And I’m gonna walk around in them a while. So if you’ll excuse me, Melissa and I are going to run up to Denver – that’s where the closest The Container Store is. Instead of worrying about events I can’t control, we’re going to buy a ton of shelving, then spend time together in the joyous labor of turning my laundry room into something useable. After that – I’ll be back with a vengeance. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Your Attention Just One More Time Please PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/28/2002 12:57:26 AM ----- BODY: Yesterday was quite a ride, kids. I’ve never seen such a flood of emails. I tried to respond with at least a few words to each of you, but if I missed you, it wasn’t neglect or for lack of trying. Bear with me. You might notice VodkaPundit is off of Blogger and onto Moveable Type. Thanks to Web Administratrix Stacy Tabb for suffering the headaches and getting the job done. You might also notice that the old comments couldn’t be transferred to the new system. Don’t worry – you can still read, and add to, yesterday’s huge volume by clicking here. As I’m sure you know, I was in quite a state yesterday. Words posted and emailed from Glenn, James, Em, Tim, Mike, Kathy, and too many others to mention kept me sane and let me know I’m not alone. Yesterday’s sad news, my response to it (and yours), taught me the meaning of the phrase “the world is too much with me.” I don’t remember who said it or where it comes from, but today it fits like custom shoes just broken in. And I’m gonna walk around in them a while. So if you’ll excuse me, Melissa and I are going to run up to Denver – that’s where the closest The Container Store is. Instead of worrying about events I can’t control, we’re going to buy a ton of shelving, then spend time together in the joyous labor of turning my laundry room into something useable. Why? Because it's something the two of us can do together, but mostly because it's something I can actually do something about. After that – I’ll be back with a vengeance. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dan Rector EMAIL: rectordan@hotmail.com IP: 172.147.62.26 URL: http://blorg.blogspot.com DATE: 03/28/2002 01:06:18 AM Enjoy it. I can't shake this 9/11 feeling. All the best, -d ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Martin EMAIL: patiopundit@yahoo.com IP: 4.47.3.13 URL: http://patiopundit.com/ DATE: 03/28/2002 01:38:13 AM Stephen, Thanks for hosting the bar tonight. It really helped. Have fun with VodkaFiancee. With much affection, Martin ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: davidmsc EMAIL: david@davidmsc.com IP: 66.69.19.163 URL: http://www.davidmsc.com DATE: 03/28/2002 03:51:01 AM Ooh - The Container Store! Brilliant concept, expertly executed. Yep - I could live in that place. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sean Kirby EMAIL: krypto246@yahoo.ca IP: 207.35.188.14 URL: http://punditexmachina.blogspot.com DATE: 03/28/2002 07:19:57 AM I know the feeling. Nothing like a trip to Ikea to shop your worries away. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 65.101.39.145 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 03/28/2002 07:38:53 AM It's good you are on MT. It will make you feel better, too. VodkaSite is one of the first places I stop, and one of the last each day. Glad it, and you, are in good health, all things considered. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 206.146.129.38 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 03/28/2002 09:00:49 AM did yaccs ever come back up? you can import them to mt. it just takes a little work. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Suman Palit EMAIL: suman@palit.com IP: 130.36.61.238 URL: http://www.palit.com/tkl.asp DATE: 03/28/2002 11:24:52 AM I'm feeling the same way right now.. it's spring in the outdoors, and much of the subcontinent is getting hell-fucked out of it's handbasket. And there is seemingly nothing anyone can do about it. I think this weekend I will be mulching the flower-beds in my lawn. Give me something else to do. - Suman ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Vicky EMAIL: vicky@deletethisbit.vodkabird.org IP: 213.1.107.42 URL: http://www.vodkabird.org DATE: 03/28/2002 11:54:05 AM Nice domain name you've got there, fellow vodkaperson! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kat EMAIL: allow.anonymouse@or.else IP: 205.245.15.248 URL: http://site-essential.com DATE: 03/28/2002 06:25:28 PM I'm with Suman -- I did a whole bunch of really physical stuff today. Including terminating some weeds "with extreme predjudice". ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Paul Yowell EMAIL: pyowell@hotmail.com IP: 205.183.154.6 URL: DATE: 03/29/2002 01:23:58 PM I don't remember the title of the sonnet, but it's Wordsworth: The world is too much with us, late and soon. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Wordsworth PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/29/2002 01:32:36 PM ----- BODY: Paul Yowell wrote in with that quote I couldn't identify. It was from Wordsworth, and even more fitting than I'd thought. The world is too much with us; late and soon, Getting and spending we lay waste our powers: Little we see in Nature that is ours; We have given our hearts away, a sordid boon! The sea that bares her bosom to the moon; The winds that will be howling at all hours And are up-gathered now like sleeping flowers; For this, for everything, we are out of tune; It moves us not. - Great God! I'd rather be A pagan suckled in a creed outworn, So might I, standing on this pleasant lea, Have glimpses that would make me less forlorn; Have sight of Proteus rising from the sea; Or hear old Triton blow his wreathèd horn. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Suman Palit EMAIL: suman@palit.com IP: 130.36.62.239 URL: http://www.palit.com/tkl.asp DATE: 03/29/2002 02:26:14 PM I want to be that pagan, please..! Perhaps a little communing with my garden is in order, have a good weekend, Stephen ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: don EMAIL: donmcarthur@nc.rr.com IP: 24.162.244.99 URL: http://home.nc.rr.com/dwmhome/ DATE: 03/29/2002 03:53:59 PM Me, I prefer a laptop and a latte' and a wi-fi hookup to broadband. Nature's got bugs in it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ravenwolf EMAIL: ravenwolfx@aol.com IP: 24.185.134.136 URL: http://ravenwolf.blogspot.com DATE: 03/29/2002 07:36:56 PM If I could, I'd take both...Sitting in the backyard enjoying the day, drinking a cup of chai while surfing the net on a laptop w/a wireless modem. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Emily EMAIL: misshawkgirl@yahoo.com IP: 216.244.1.11 URL: http://http//:hawkgirl@yahoo.com DATE: 03/29/2002 10:35:04 PM Steve, As always, you leave me breathless. I hope your shelves happened without incident. Happy holiday, even if you are a godless pagan :P. Em:) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kathy EMAIL: you.know.where@I.am IP: 64.45.219.3 URL: http://site-essential.com DATE: 03/30/2002 06:21:48 AM Have to agree with Ravenwolf on that one, though I think I'd pick a beach rather than my back yard... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Joe Baby EMAIL: joe_baby_phx@yahoo.com IP: 63.14.192.204 URL: http://moronwatch.blogspot.com DATE: 03/30/2002 01:44:24 PM Nothing like a bit of good shelving to make one feel like all is right with the world. Tipping a vodka drink in honor of Die WodkaPoondit. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ravenwolf EMAIL: ravenwolfx@aol.com IP: 24.185.134.136 URL: http://ravenwolf.blogspot.com DATE: 03/30/2002 04:21:01 PM Kathy: I was thinking "beach" but since Suman metioned "garden", I tried to put the two together... :) ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Bolt the Doors and Hide Yer Daughters PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 03/31/2002 10:14:34 PM ----- BODY: Four days of simple chores, too much good food & wine, and letting the world go to hell without my input – and I’m feeling much better now, thank you. It’s just past 10pm Mountain, and I already have Monday’s New York Times, OpinionJournal, and, yes, the Guardian loaded up and ready for targeting. All is not well in the world, but my little corner of it is certainly looking up. Oh, and a good beer to Glenn and a big, wet, sloppy kiss to Asp for writing in and checking up on me. I’m back. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 207.172.11.150 URL: DATE: 03/31/2002 10:37:29 PM Stephen, Welcome back! Some of us were wondering where you'd disappeared off to, and were missing your incisive comments. The world continues apace. We look forward to hearing your reactions to that! (We're also glad to hear that your outlook has improved significantly.) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Joe Baby EMAIL: joe_baby_phx@yahoo.com IP: 63.14.218.90 URL: http://moronwatch.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 12:05:35 AM For one example that there's still justice in the world, Indiana plays in tonight's National Championship and Bob Knight is not the coach. Win or lose, I expect that zero chairs will be tossed tonight in Atlanta. Expect maybe one or two thrown around in Lubbock, perhaps thrown at the TV screen in envy. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: It’s No Edsel PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:03:55 AM ----- BODY: When I need advice during the day, I get to talk to my puppy cat, Francisco Domingo Carlos Andres Sebastian d’Anconia. When Bill Safire wants to get good dish, he picks up the phone and talks to Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon. So being a professional pundit has its advantages. Frankly, I’m worried about Sharon and how he’s waging this new Israeli-Palestinian War. “Strike and withdraw” has been tried before by our politicians – in a little country called Vietnam. It doesn’t work. To win a war, you have to defeat the enemy. Stinging him then moving back does two things: It lets him adapt to your strategy and teaches him he only has to last longer than your patience. Near as I can tell, that’s what Sharon is doing. Sigh. But let’s be fair and hear it in his own words, as spoken to Safire. "The goal of our operation is to uproot terrorist activity throughout the territories. We have no intention to stay, only to stop these terrible things. In the past month, we have 115 Israelis killed, 1,656 injured; in the past year, 401 killed, 3,538 injured. We are creating a buffer zone, of some depth, along what used to be the green line. Buffer zones, enemy casualties, no talk of how to defeat the enemy. . . Sounds like the 1967 model of Robert McNamara to me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Loweeel EMAIL: loweeel@loweeel.com IP: 137.165.35.89 URL: http://quotes.loweeel.com DATE: 04/01/2002 06:14:46 AM You named the cat when you were 19, right? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 209.179.210.63 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/01/2002 06:16:05 AM Perhaps Israelis will have to wait until Netanyahu returns to the prime minister's office for a real victory. I hope there's time to wait for that. Oh, and we can thank snakehead Carville and the other Clinton whores for helping to turn Netanyahu out of office. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:18:21 AM The cat -- Ding or Dingo for short -- is only five years old, Loweeel. But as a kitten, he had black hair and and attitude. So the name fit. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 65.29.12.122 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/01/2002 07:30:25 PM my ex has a cat named dagny and a great dane named ragnar. they should meet. or not... ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: A Quick Thought PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:04:58 AM ----- BODY: Which is easier to guard, the Jordan River or the Green Line? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Kudos PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:16:35 AM ----- BODY: Except for the rare occasion when they’re on a full-page Free Trade at Any Price kick, I usually find something cringe-worthy on OpinionJournal. Not today. Wow. Instead of writing up everything, I’ll just give you the appropriate links. Here we go. Paul Johnson looks at why nations fight on holy days. Robert Bartley hopes again. This one is this morning’s Required Reading. Extra! OpinionJournal might be “misleading and fundamentally unfair.” This site certainly is – you gotta problem with that? This atheist respects the hell out of military chaplains and the good work they do. Brendan Miniter explains why. I’ve never gone and given a full blessing to an entire newspaper op-ed page before. Did too many days off dull my edge? Nah. We haven’t gotten to The Guardian yet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In The Guardian PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:24:01 AM ----- BODY: I think it was Sullivan who reminded us a while back of my favorite Orwell essay. In it, Orwell demonstrated how Brits who didn’t support the war effort were, in effect, supporting the Nazis. So much for “fairness.” (I’d have a link, but Andrew’s archives aren’t searchable. And yes, I sent him an email about it.) That’s usually the case with our media and the Israeli-Palestinian War. The effort to provide “balance” robs the Israelis of their almost-complete moral superiority, and provides Arafat with a moral luster he doesn’t deserve. I have a point, and I’m coming to it now. Our media is biased, usually, in the misguided attempt to provide balance. The Guardian throws that pretense out with the bath water, and just go full-bore tilt towards Arafat. Check out this lede from Monday’s front page story: Saturday was a dinner of boiled potatoes by candlelight for Yasser Arafat, a long night of waiting for the Israeli tanks grinding their gears outside his office to rev up for the final assault, and for the Palestinian leader to embrace the martyrdom he says he craves. Careful readers will have already guessed that bit of Blow Job Journalism was written by none other than Suzanne Goldenberg. There’s a wonderful being-a-junky-is-awful movie with Ben Stiller that I dearly love. It’s called Permanent Midnight, and it’s based on writer Jerry Stahl’s true story. In one sequence, he picks up a lovely Teutonic woman and takes her home. After, in a heavy German accent, she says, “I cahn’t beleef I yust fucked a Yew.” Reverse that, and you’ll get a sense of Suzanne Goldenberg’s self-loathing. Only in The Guardian, kids. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 207.172.11.150 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 10:09:03 AM Just FYI, you can find Goldenberg, plus a whole raft of other such writers, at tikkun.org, the web-site for Tikkun magazine. All in one convenient, easy-to-throw-at-wall location. The folks there leave me truly flabbergasted. If there is one group that should be aware of the dangers inherent in unthinking appeasement, it should be Jews. Yet, Lerner and his ilk seem to have learned nothing at all. Worse, they would argue against those who, imho, have. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Doug EMAIL: dnchan07@earthlink.net IP: 207.69.18.17 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:32:31 PM Is the Orwell essay you're referring to "Notes on Nationalism?" http://www.resort.com/~prime8/Orwell/nationalism.html ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He’d Be More Useful If He Were Less Talkative PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:28:54 AM ----- BODY: Former UN ambassador Richard Holbrooke gets a spot on today’s Washington Post op-ed page. We’ll just look at the first graf, then go wash our hands: In Afghanistan American strength and skill will win every military engagement. But those victories will be worth little in the long run if they are not followed up by a successful nation-building effort. Translation: “Please don’t tell me my entire career of sucking up to oily foreign ministers was a total waste.” I understand that that is what an ambassador has to do to be effective, but it doesn’t make Holbrooke any wiser or more effective. This will undoubtedly be lengthy, costly and difficult, but given the stakes in Afghanistan, we must succeed in this larger mission or face what could ultimately be a failure, no matter how well the military campaign goes. Translation: “If we don’t make all my other bad prognostications look good, then the terrorists will have won.” It’s become quite clear that our enemies don’t respect nation-building. It took us three centuries to build the greatest city skyline in history, and their response was to fly airplanes into its two biggest landmarks. No, our enemies respect brutal, naked power, applied spectacularly and without pity. Nation-building would be a nice goal -- after we’ve won. But it is in no way inherent to winning. Hell, were it not for the Soviet threat, we might have followed Morganthau’s plan for post-WWII Germany. Afghanistan can’t be Morganthoued – they don’t have any industry to eliminate. But that doesn’t mean we have to play nanny state there, either. Let’s not get distracted here, or bogged down there. We still have work to do. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Walt Pohl EMAIL: cher@suitware.com IP: 206.63.252.129 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 09:36:54 AM I think you must have Richard Holbrooke mixed up with someone else. He is definitely of the "invade first, nation-build second" school of diplomacy. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:16:35 AM Walt, I apologized to Holbrooke in advance -- sucking up to dictators was part of his job. But he did write that column, and he did write those words. The onus is on him to disown what he said, not on me to argue that he didn't really mean it. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Mending Wailing Wall PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:32:26 AM ----- BODY: Since ancient Greece, hubris has been the cause of much war and suffering. Today, Gershom Gorenberg explains how hubris has caused Israel to ignore Robert Frost’s advice about good fences and good neighbors. A fine Monday morning look at how life is really lived on an Israeli settlement. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Doug Turnbull EMAIL: dt4211@hotmail.com IP: 132.250.130.33 URL: http://beautyofgray.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 10:45:11 AM Just to be pedantic, unless I've been misreading it, Frost's poem is actually a rebuke to those who simply and unreflectingly say that "Good fences make good neighbors." From the poem: He only says, 'Good fences make good neighbors'. Spring is the mischief in me, and I wonder If I could put a notion in his head: 'Why do they make good neighbors? Isn't it Where there are cows? But here there are no cows. Before I built a wall I'd ask to know What I was walling in or walling out, And to whom I was like to give offence. Something there is that doesn't love a wall, That wants it down.' ... He moves in darkness as it seems to me~ Not of woods only and the shade of trees. He will not go behind his father's saying, And he likes having thought of it so well He says again, "Good fences make good neighbors." ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: What a Waste PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:34:46 AM ----- BODY: Wednesday, this week’s Newsweek should arrive in my mailbox. I’ll be throwing it out before I even look at the cover. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 209.179.210.63 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/01/2002 06:07:13 AM Exaclty what I thought when I saw a blurb about the new issue, were I a subscriber. I never thought I'd miss Jimmy Carter's presidency. At least when he left office, he conducted himself with a little grace and stayed mostly out of the public eye for quite a while. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Debi Cone EMAIL: tmi13@hotmail.com IP: 66.3.47.194 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:04:54 PM I agree. Fer cryin' out loud, even Nixon was able to redeem himself because he had a certain degree of foreign policy savvy. This guy however, is a blight...a jagged, nasty scar. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Lori EMAIL: blogger@optonline.net IP: 204.124.248.62 URL: http://rumination.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 12:12:27 PM I forced myself to read it online just so I could rip it apart. That way I got to skip the smarmy pictures. Looking at the man gives me the creeps ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Perry de Havilland Shrugged PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:35:51 AM ----- BODY: The House of Windsor, I am forced to admit, serves an important function for the Brits. It is with sadness that I learned of the expected death of the Queen Mum. I have no use for any of her offspring, but she was a truly great old broad. During the worst of the Blitz, when Britain stood alone, the then-Queen stood defiant. After Buckingham Palace was bombed, she was encouraged to flee to Canada. I don’t have the exact quote here, but this is a pretty good paraphrase: “I won’t go without the children, and the children won’t go without (King) George, and George simply won’t go.” Now there’s a gal I would love to have enjoyed a noontime cocktail or three with. And she would have enjoyed them just as much. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill Woods EMAIL: wwoods@ix.netcom.com IP: 165.247.215.144 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 02:06:57 PM You got the order slightly wrong. From _Bartlett's_: "The children will not leave unless I do. I shall not leave unless their father does, and the King will not leave the country under any circumstances whatever." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 03:39:20 PM Thanks, Bill! ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: One Last Ride On the High Horse PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:38:45 AM ----- BODY: It took longer than I thought, but the nasty letters to That Post started coming in a couple days ago. I’ve been accused of being a Nazi, and, um, being a Nazi. Also, several wrote in to accuse me of being a Nazi. If you’ll scroll through these pages, you’ll see that until last Wednesday, I called for Israel to abandon their West Bank settlements, get out of Gaza, give up bits of East Jerusalem – I pretty much endorsed the Überdovish Camp David II peace plan. It was only Arab rejectionism and Palestinian atrocities that caused me to cry out like I did. Can Israel eject the Palestinians from the West Bank? Yes. Although probably only with more bloodshed than we (or they) would be willing to endure. But it still beats the goddamn alternatives. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Myria EMAIL: myria@mindspring.com IP: 63.214.118.9 URL: http://myria.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 09:40:14 AM Well, I could be wrong, but given how much many Arabs and their supporters seem to admire the Nazis and like to use the long-discredited Nazi libels and all, calling you a Nazi might have been meant as a compliment? Myria ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 198.174.110.254 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/01/2002 10:33:03 AM yeah. i was thinking (nazi=anti-israeli), rather than (nazi=fascist) too. interesting choice of words... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brian EMAIL: harriersix@swirve.com IP: 204.186.1.102 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 10:52:14 AM Firstly, the Nazis didn't endure decades of terrorism and a enemy determined to exterminate them... They did what they did because they needed a scapegoat for their financial, populations and political troubles. Doing a thing for survival is entirely different from doing it for lesser reasons. Secondly, accuzations of Nazism is the last gasp of a mind that has run out of ideas. In USENET(discussion groups), there is what we call the 'Hitler law': The devisivness of the issue discussed, multiplied by the general idiocy quotint(GIQ) inversely determines the amount of time before each side starts comparing the other to Hitler. In this case, we have a lot of devisiveness, and a lot of idiots, so a quick devolvement to Hitler-namecalling was inevitable. Thirldy, most of these nations who condemn 'clensing' the palestinian areas are guilty of purging their own jewish (and sometimes palestinian, in the case of Kuwait) populations. But that's OK for arabs to do, we don't really expect them to act like humans anyway... do we? So, in conclusion, go pound sand you chattering, civilization-hating namecallers. Your advice would lead Isreal down the path of another few decades of death, followed by nuclear annihilation the second one of these nutjob Arab dictatorships get a hold of a nuke (not that this isn't going to happen anyway) These bastachs LIE. They promise cease-fires, then send the next round of bombers. They say they want peace, but refuse stunning concessions in preferance to more war. They make a deal that commits them to Israel's right to exist, then fill their children's classroms with maps that have Israel crossed out. And by defending them, you are liars by extentsion. Go the hell away, and let the people who actually want peace do their work. You can bitch after we're done. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Joan G EMAIL: goldbergfr3@yahoo.com IP: 195.92.67.65 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:14:25 PM I can't see anyone calling you a Nazi, but I can see several people calling for the extermination of the Palestinians. I've also seen references to concentration camps in blogs you link to. This isn't a game. Genocide isn't funny. All these idiots mouthing off about exterminating populations are echoing Germany in 1933. I am an Israeli citizen, (and an American one) and I find it absolutely terrifying reading this rubbish. Have you learned nothing? Israel needs to be helped, supported and protected at all costs- but genocide? Some of your more idiotic correspondents need to understand how words like 'extermination' fit in with the Israeli psyche, and how this kind of mental drool gives the Arab world such an easy pass. I feel totally sick. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brian EMAIL: harriersix@swirve.com IP: 204.186.1.109 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:05:50 AM > ...but I can see several people calling for the extermination of the Palestinians. I've also seen references to concentration camps in blogs you link to. I notice you fail to make the distinction between evicting them and killing them. And linking to a blog doesn't mean you agree with everything they say. >This isn't a game. Genocide isn't funny. No, it isn't. But if it was, the palestinians would be hoarse from decades of constant laughter. >All these idiots mouthing off about exterminating populations are echoing Germany in 1933. All these idiots mouthing off about appeasing these monsters are echoing the allies in 1927. >I am an Israeli citizen, (and an American one) and I find it absolutely terrifying reading this rubbish. Have you learned nothing? Yes, we have learned. It is the people who STILL believe that the Arabs and Palestinians will accept less then the total destruction of Isreal who have learned nothing. Your ilk would have us do the same thing that has allowed Israel such blessed peace for so long. How much you must love your country. Your kind, while more reasonable then many, would believe anything Arafat says, because you WANT to believe in peace. You want it so desperately that you ignore what Arafat says in Arabic to his people after his press conference in English. You want it so desperately that when former prime ministers of major arab nations assert that Israel will die as soon as said nations get a nuke, you assume they must be joking. You want it so desperately, that it could be proven to you all day and all night that Iran is arming these militants, and you would either not believe or not care. You want it so desperately, that even seeing cheering palestinians in the streets celebrating Sept 11, you somehow think that this is not a nation of poisonous snakes. What will it take, Arafat declaring 9/11 as 'Osama day'? Or wouldn't that be enough? You want it so desperately, even the fact that Iraq is giving huge (for the region) sums of cash to the families will not shake you from the belief that somehow, all these people want is peace, deep down. You are a fool, and you are being played. Which would only be comical if the idiocy wasn't resulting in more slaughter. >Israel needs to be helped, supported and protected at all costs- but genocide? Only as the last option. Which option did you have in mind (that hasn't been tried already?) >Some of your more idiotic correspondents need to understand how words like 'extermination' fit in with the Israeli psyche, I understand that the nation of Israel would almost prefer to die then commit that act to survive. The same cannot be said of their enemies. >...and how this kind of mental drool gives the Arab world such an easy pass. Chortle. YOU are the one giving them an easy pass. Every time you pretend this rabid dog is just misunderstood, that all we need is the will to love our neighbor, you give them more time to kill more Israelis. For years now, almost the entire nation of palestine (I say 'almost' because there must be some dissidents, somewhere I guess) has been involved in some aspect of bringing death and misery to their neighbors. If they aren't killing settlers, blowing themselves up, or stockpiling weapons, they are teaching the next generation to hate even more fervently then the last. In the final analysis, you object to regarding palestinian civilans as war targets. Which would be fine... if the other side had such scruples. You are objecting to Isreali soldiers treating the Palestinians in the same manner that Palestinian militants treat Isrealies... as targets. Isn't that hypocritical? All of the palestinians must be regarded as a hostile army, because that is exactly what they are. >I feel totally sick. Not sick enough to change your attitudes, I see. When Israel dies as a nation, will you cry for them or for the arabs? ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He’s No E.F. Hutton PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:42:36 AM ----- BODY: When VodkaPundit speaks of Will Warren, you only need to know two things: He’s written something wonderful, and you must read it now. Were I more patient or less lazy or better with words, I’d be trying to do what Will does. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 209.179.210.63 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/01/2002 06:02:23 AM Stephen, the link to Warren's piece doesn't show up here. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:13:04 AM HTML will be the death of me. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: I Bet Megan Would Agree PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:49:42 AM ----- BODY: Professor Johnson, my favorite econ prof at Mizzou, once gave a lecture called "Why the Ticket Scalper Is Your Best Friend." He -- and my love of things crisp, green, and foldy -- gave me both my love for economics, and my sometimes crass why of explaining things. So it's with the senile smile of reminiscence, that I bring to you the latest Mike Lynch piece in Reason. Today, Mike explains, against all conventional wisdom, how those awful check cashing places serve the poor. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: With Friends Like These, You Have an Enema PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:50:33 AM ----- BODY: Joe Klein on Al Gore in Slate: The Democrats’ Gore problem is a simple one: Despite winning a bare majority of the popular vote, he was a dreadful candidate in 2000, who somehow managed to turn eight years of peace and prosperity into an electoral burden. He is a smug, stubborn, and aloof human being. He will clutter the race in 2004, suck money from other candidates, force some interesting possibilities from the field, run another awkward, tired faux-populist campaign and, if nominated, he will lose, more decisively this time, to George W. Bush. And that’s one of the nicer bits. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Brenda Kaye EMAIL: brenda_largent@matria.com IP: 65.208.95.206 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 10:58:46 AM And for all those reasons, I have long felt that Gore running again is a fine idea! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:42:05 AM I know exactly what you mean, Brenda. I just don't know if I can take another entire presidential campaign year with that man on TV every night. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Analyze THIS PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:54:13 AM ----- BODY: Lee Hockstader provides this bit of “analysis” for the Washington Post: The trap for Sharon is the pursuit of military victory in a conflict in which Israel’s massive superiority in arms, technology and training counts for little. The more aggressively Sharon attacks Palestinian towns and refugee camps, and the more resolutely he moves against Arafat, the more elusive is the definition of Israeli “victory.” I’m not in the mood for fishbarelling today. Anyone want to take this one for me? NOTE: I was going to provide a cute little link for the fishbarelling reference, but there were only three Google hits for it. Me, Glenn, and Amygdalagf. C’mon, bloggers – let’s get this word into the OED by 2005! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Martin EMAIL: patiopundit@yahoo.com IP: 4.47.3.13 URL: http://patiopundit.com/ DATE: 04/01/2002 01:14:42 AM I already covered for you on Kristof. You'll have to find someone else on to do this clown. (Unless I already did it and forgot. It HAS been 4 days. You never write, you never call - OY) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:25:43 AM Kristof's Friday column? Thanks! I'm still playing catch-up after my break. He'll be back again Tuesday... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Christopher Hlatky EMAIL: hlatkyc@aol.com IP: 149.2.134.155 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 09:45:30 AM Ummm... good word, but shouldn't it be "fishbarreling?" :-) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 198.174.110.254 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/01/2002 10:37:50 AM maybe because you spelled "barrel" wrong? i didn't check... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:10:47 AM A typo on THIS site? I'm shocked, SHOCKED! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Gary Farber EMAIL: gfarber@savvy.com IP: 204.32.193.151 URL: http://amygdalagf.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 12:33:52 PM *Cough*. The name of the blog is "Amygdala," a perfectly good English noun. See the "our mysterious name" link on the left-hand column of my blog. I'm all for your crusade to get "fishbarrelling" into the OED, since I coined it. :-) (You should also find hits on Bill Quick's site, and probably Matt Welch's, and a few others.) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:50:26 PM Maybe Google was having an off night, Gary... That, and my poor spelling skills, are my excuses. And I'll stick with them. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Doug EMAIL: dnchan07@earthlink.net IP: 207.69.18.17 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:04:21 PM DejaNews, a/k/a Google Groups, does show one match for "fishbarelling" (none for "fishbarrelling" or "fishbareling"), posted by one Lupo LeBoucher to alt.satanism in September 1997. Strange, I thought the word would be all over Usenet. "Fishbarrelling" is a great word. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 02:04:31 PM Oops. I forgot to apologize to Gary and his lovely Amylollapalooza website. I'll get it right someday, I swear. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: We Get Letters PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:03:18 AM ----- BODY: One of the most flattering letters I got this weekend was from Jim Meidell, who asked where the hell my PayPal is. I've thought about putting one up, really. Hell, the first thing I ever got published on a blog was an email to the Professor last October, urging him to take out money. But here's how I look at it. I'm too old to sign up and go fight. I don't own a munitions factory, nor do I have any interest in running for office. Uncle Sam has yet to ask me to plant a victory garden or sew blankets. So the least I can do is beat the war drum, and do a little to keep people focused. This is my contribution to the war effort. It's not much, but it's what I can do. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: danbrot EMAIL: danbrot@aol.com IP: 152.163.201.189 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 08:06:24 AM Keep it up! And thanks. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: John B. EMAIL: johnburt@fast.net IP: 209.92.53.122 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 09:09:27 AM Cheers mate! Keep up the good work. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 206.146.129.38 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/03/2002 08:50:42 AM plant a victory garden anyway. keeps you on your toes. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Arafat Strung Up By Heels, On Accident PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:05:08 AM ----- BODY: Debka reports that Sharon may be seeking to exile Arafat if the IDF takes him alive. Pointless. A dead martyr is still, well, dead. This site, and many others, has argued that the time has come for Arafat to breathe dirt. UPDATE: World leaders are warning Israel not to harm Arafat. I’m now looking into my crystal ball, and I see some unknown IDF captain looking slightly sheepish and saying “Oops.” ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 08:36:30 AM Good. I've always had enormous respect for slightly sheepish IDF Captains. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 198.174.110.254 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/01/2002 10:42:17 AM bad captain! ten minutes in time-out. and no dessert for you. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:40:06 AM Well, maybe a little strudle after everyone else has eaten. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: So Who Is the American Chamberlain? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:12:15 AM ----- BODY: Can the left-liberals still love Arafat after Ha’aretz has labeled him “the Palestinian Milosevic?” Nice little op-ed piece that’s worth your time. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Our Friends the Saudis PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:21:19 AM ----- BODY: Every once in a while, I love to go over to Arab News and see what our Saudi friends have to say. Here are their top three headlines for Monday: "Israeli Army begins summary executions" "Sharon knows only law of the jungle: Abdullah" "Siege of Arafat greatest crime in history: Sultan" In case you're not usre, the "Abdullah" in the second header is the Saudi Crown Prince and de facto ruler. How sweet. The Sultan mentioned in the last headline is none other than "moderate" bin Abdulaziz, who was always pleading for US help on CNN in 1990. Forget the Arab street -- listen to their damn leaders a moment. We're in trouble. But they're in it deeper. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sean Kirby EMAIL: krypto246@yahoo.ca IP: 64.229.209.149 URL: http://punditexmachina.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 10:37:20 AM Visiting Arabnews.com has a weird "hobbit lost in an orc camp" quality too it. I read the headlines, get scared, and start franticly searching for my magic ring. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:39:16 AM It's a whole other world, Sean. These aren't rational people. Araby needs new leadership. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: An Immodest Proposal PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:23:54 AM ----- BODY: Fellow '80s child Dave Tepper calls on more people to get drunk and naked. First sensible thing I've heard in a week. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: He Knows the Quote Is Wrong PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:31:04 AM ----- BODY: Link via Drudge. Arafat: "Allah, give me martyrdom." Allah: "OK." A man can dream, can't he? Else what's a hell for? Arafat wants to die like a snail wants a salt lick. If he had a single concern past his own celebrity, wealth, and power, he'd have taken the Camp David II deal, and built a real nation for his people. Instead, he continues to urge young men and women to kill innocents for no good reason and no just cause. And even if the Israelis kill Arafat slowly with low-grade sandpaper, he has the same odds of becoming a holy martyr as I have of becoming chaste, sober, and soft-spoken -- on a Friday night. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: jim naso EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 64.12.107.23 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 06:27:18 AM It was always my unexpert opinion that if Arafat turned up dead, it would more likely be at the hands of an Arab than a Jew. Arafat held power by viciously and murderously putting down any competition. The bitter internecine fight for power among the Palestinians should have in itself eliminated Arafat as a Nobel Peace Prize candidate. If some member of, say, Hamas puts the hit on Arafat, he might not be thought of a martyr. But if the Isrealis end up doing it, he probably will. I agree with those who have written that Arafat and his ilk have no idea how to build a workable Palestinian state. Arafat in this respect is similar to the recently deceased Jonas Savimbi, who helped keep Angola in a perpetual state of civil war for almost 30 years. These guys derive their power and support by being terrorists and revolutionaries. Establishing free elections, developing a functioning economy, etc. is way beyond them. Regards. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sean Kirby EMAIL: krypto246@yahoo.ca IP: 64.229.209.149 URL: http://punditexmachina.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 10:40:16 AM Arafat on St. Augustine: "Allah, give me martyrdom... but not yet." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:10:53 PM Say it with me now, "Kill Arafat slowly with low-grade sandpaper." Quite possibly the cruelest thing I've ever written. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sean Kirby EMAIL: krypto246@yahoo.ca IP: 64.229.209.149 URL: http://punditexmachina.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 01:45:24 PM I say forget crualty. Just shot him once in the face, then toss his body to the pigs without a second thought. The guy doesn't deserve the attention. He's had to much of it in life. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Worthwhile Foreign Aid PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:55:20 AM ----- BODY: Israel is a nation that needs to win its wars quickly. The active duty Israeli Defense Force (IDF) is fairly small, with only about 150,000 men and women under arms. In war, its job is to hold off the bad guys long enough for the reserves to come into play. Then, they have six times the manpower, and even more firepower. But at what cost? When Israel mobilizes half a million men and women, they lose a huge chunk of their workforce. Their economy simply comes to a halt, because too many workers are away from their desks and driving Merkavas into battle. I think that may be part of the reason Sharon is taking his slow-motion approach to fighting the Palestinian terrorists. By calling up few reserves, he lets the economy keep working. That's a recipe for disaster. Ratcheting up the pressure doesn't work, and Sharon is probably only two or three more suicide bombings away from remembering that hard lesson. If push comes to shove, I have no doubt our President and our Congress will not hesitate sending Israel as many beans and bullets as they need to fight and win this war. But their economy will also suffer greatly -- so we should be there with economic aid, too. Try to remember all the costs our toughest, surest ally must pay. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: April No More Foolish Than Usual PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 03:23:12 AM ----- BODY: I was going to do an April Fool's, but Bjorn brilliantly beat me to it, and since it's my first day back, I thought you deserved the real deal. Next year promises to be vicious, however. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 209.179.210.63 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/01/2002 05:58:32 AM I'm glad you're back. I'm inspired (and entertained) again. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sean Kirby EMAIL: krypto246@yahoo.ca IP: 64.229.209.149 URL: http://punditexmachina.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 10:34:16 AM April 1st is a bad day for blogging, the shit going on in the real world already seems like a joke, nobody can tell what the hell is going on anymore. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Emily EMAIL: misshawkgirl@yahoo.com IP: 64.173.103.74 URL: http://hawkgirl.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 10:39:56 AM I'm with Craig; you've been missed, Steve. Happy to see you back and hitting the ground running. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Mike EMAIL: coldfury@bellsouth.net IP: 66.157.112.160 URL: http://www.webworxh-i.com/coldfury DATE: 04/01/2002 12:43:21 PM I'll just second what Em and Craig said, and while I'm at it I'll ditto Sean as well. I might do an April Fool's posting, but if I do I'll wait till tomorrow so it'll be more confusing for everybody. Myself included. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Slept With News On, Woke Up Mad PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:36:25 AM ----- BODY: Fred Pruitt goes into more detail on how (and why) Arafat might get his arse shot off. Totally, completely, 100% on accident of course. It's the OJ assassination. Let's line up some excuses in advance for whichever IDF soldier gets the honor of papering a wall with Arafat's gray matter: "I swear, I thought it was an evil circus midget." "I thought he said, 'Erik, make me a martyr.' Hi, I'm Erik." "Oops. My bad." "It was Allah's will." "The dog misadjusted my gunsights." "That one was Arafat? Cool." "Pvt. Cohen bet me five shekels I couldn't hit that Pizza Hut tablecloth from here. I didn't realize someone's head was in it." "I asked him who he was and if he wanted to die, and I could have sworn he said, 'Yes, sir.'" Feel free to add your own in the Drinks. Bonus points for anything especially silly or unbelievable. Best entry wins nothing at all. Do it for the glory. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Gregg Fanselau EMAIL: terminal_99@hotmail.com IP: 12.33.184.131 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:20:12 PM That wasn't a sow? You sure? The design on the kaffiyah sure looked like a bunch of little bullseyes to me! My CO said to take out the garbage. It was assisted suicide -- just like in Holland! Aren't we supposed address the root causes of terrorism? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Myria EMAIL: myria@mindspring.com IP: 63.214.118.9 URL: http://myria.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 12:24:06 PM "We're so sorry, we thought our machineguns were set on 'stun'." Myria ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Terry EMAIL: tdbrazeal@nfow.com IP: 208.226.184.170 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:35:32 PM "It depends on what your defiition of "dead" is." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Emily EMAIL: misshawkgirl@yahoo.com IP: 64.173.103.74 URL: http://hawkgirl.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 12:56:47 PM "'Be a martyr'? I thought he said 'Eat some mortar'!" or "To hell with excuses. I iced the %&*$er on purpose." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Pejman Yousefzadeh EMAIL: pejman64@yahoo.com IP: 206.215.77.147 URL: http://www.pejmanyousefzadeh.com DATE: 04/01/2002 01:09:52 PM "I never liked Ringo Starr." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dave EMAIL: dtepper@davetepper.net IP: 199.173.224.20 URL: http://www.davetepper.net DATE: 04/01/2002 01:37:59 PM "My name is Inigo Montoya..." (I shouldn't have to explain this!) "But he said he could catch a bullet in his teeth!" "I figured 'Who Shot Yasser' would be the biggest ratings booster since 'Who Shot J.R.'" ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Enough EMAIL: dont@email.me IP: 129.188.33.225 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:38:17 PM "Nobody hangs up on Christiane!" ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:42:25 PM "Well, it suddenly occurred to me that a sucking chest wound would nicely complement his Nobel Peace Prize." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 01:57:34 PM So far, I'm leaning towards Em's expletives, or Bill's sucking chest wound. Which just shows you the level of humor in this joint. Pejman, ya gotta aim LOWER, man! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 216.244.7.130 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/01/2002 02:00:46 PM "He was scaring the children." "I was just cleaning my gun and it went off." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 216.244.7.130 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/01/2002 02:03:10 PM On aiming lower: Maybe he'll get shot "in the groin" like that Al Qaeda dog just handed over to the U.S. by the Pakistanis. That'd be justice. No more hope of 72 virgins, right? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 02:03:44 PM Aim lower? You mean like a sucking groin wound? Ewwwww . . . ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Megan McArdle EMAIL: janegalt@hotmail.com IP: 12.88.89.80 URL: http://www.janegalt.net DATE: 04/01/2002 02:05:56 PM It wasn't us. And just as soon as the war is over, we're going to dedicate ourselves full time to finding the real killer. I didn't know he meant Bud light. When he started waving his hands and shouting, I thought he wanted me to throw him the grenade. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: BJ EMAIL: BeJayDiary@aol.com IP: 172.163.171.188 URL: http://bigjon.diaryland.com DATE: 04/01/2002 02:14:08 PM Two for the "TV & video games cause violence" crowd... Well, I was just camping at their re-spawn point with the rocket launcher. I didn't realize the splash damage would reach that far... What, this isn't Team Fortress Classic? Maybe I shouldn't have watched all those old Stallone & Ah-nold movies... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Ricky EMAIL: surfadelic23@aol.com IP: 198.199.226.254 URL: http://shortattention.blogspot.com/ DATE: 04/01/2002 02:24:40 PM I did it for the nookie. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 02:27:01 PM Oooh, it's gonna be tough to beat Ricky's entry. Brutal, silly, and flippant. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Meryl Yourish EMAIL: meryl@nospamplease.com IP: 216.118.69.57 URL: http://www.yourish.com/ DATE: 04/01/2002 02:41:48 PM If the guy's a load, he must explode --Johnny Cochran ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: davidmsc EMAIL: david@davidmsc.com IP: 66.69.19.163 URL: http://www.davidmsc.com DATE: 04/01/2002 03:28:34 PM 1. Oops...my finger slipped. 2. Oops...it slipped AGAIN! or To Infinity & Beyond! (a la Buzz) He called me STUPID! (a la Otto) or Somebody SuperGlued my finger to the trigger! Thanks -- you've been a great crowd -- I'll be here all week! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Charles Austin EMAIL: charlesaustin@earthlink.net IP: 147.81.161.128 URL: http://sinequanon.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 04:45:36 PM He said Beetlejuice twice very quickly and shooting him was my only option before he said it again. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Charles Austin EMAIL: charlesaustin@earthlink.net IP: 147.81.161.128 URL: http://sinequanon.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 04:48:41 PM I just snapped when he got to the third verse of "My Way". ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Quana EMAIL: qxjones@yahoo.com IP: 172.171.0.100 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:05:28 PM The confusion defense: Wait. THAT one was Arafat? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:15:43 PM "I swear I was aiming to the left, at Señor Fartybutt." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Charles Austin EMAIL: charlesaustin@earthlink.net IP: 147.81.161.128 URL: http://sinequanon.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 05:16:26 PM I wish this were on the Samuel L. Jackson soundboard: JULES: There's a passage I got memorized, seems appropriate for this situation: Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." The two men EMPTY their guns at the same time on the sitting Arafat. When they are finished, the bullet-ridden carcass just sits there for a moment, then TOPPLES over. All is quiet. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Zach EMAIL: zachglazar@hotmail.com IP: 206.102.192.194 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:28:32 PM I hope this isn't too late . . . but I think the soldier should state that perhaps he had too much Iced Tea and missed the relevant part of the meeting when they said not to kill the bastard. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Charles Austin EMAIL: charlesaustin@earthlink.net IP: 147.81.161.128 URL: http://sinequanon.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 05:30:10 PM As Arafat looks up and reaches for his submachine gun, the young soldier points whs weapon at him and says: 'Uh-huh. I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, I forgot myself in all this excitement. But being as this is the .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world and could blow your head clean off, you have to ask yourself one question, "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do you, punk?' ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Fred EMAIL: phrerad@hotmail.com IP: 205.166.37.110 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:51:55 PM I was standing next a photographer, and I swear I heard Arafat ask for "A couple head shots". Oops, my bad. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Charles Austin EMAIL: charlesaustin@earthlink.net IP: 147.81.161.128 URL: http://sinequanon.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 06:14:10 PM Well sir, it was really weird. All of a sudden, Yassir started talking with a southern drawl and said "Hold my beer, hey y'all watch this." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kato EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 205.188.198.187 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:06:02 PM I just felt like martyring someone today. Edward Said gave me a C+. Sorry. I was aiming at the pedophile priest. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jane Galt EMAIL: janegalt@hotmail.com IP: 12.88.86.120 URL: http://www.janegalt.net DATE: 04/02/2002 02:42:00 PM I asked him if he felt lucky. He said yes. Hard luck. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dave Crawford EMAIL: sotac27@yahoo.com IP: 198.26.118.36 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 05:04:56 PM "Ah come on, you're kidding me, right? I mean nothin' that ugly could possibly be human." ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Marc EMAIL: mbosse@telus.net IP: 66.183.244.126 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 09:39:15 PM Gimme a break, I just handed the guy seventy-two virgins. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Bold Prediction PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 11:59:10 AM ----- BODY: Link via Robert Speirs. Harsh words from former (and future) Israeli PM Binyamin Netanyahu: The message Palestinian terrorists are sending us is crystal clear: We will murder you at every opportunity, in every place, at any time - even on the holiest of your days. That, sadly, is exactly what it comes down to. For the foreseeable future, coexistence is simply not possible. Anyone advocating such is, in reality, arguing in favor of continued butchery and barbarity. Netanhayu is making the TV rounds, especially on FoxNews. Keep an eye out for him. Odds are, he'll be leading a Likud-only government in Israel next year. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Lori EMAIL: blogger@optonline.net IP: 204.124.248.62 URL: http://rumination.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 02:06:50 PM I loved the idea he was talking about last week - arrest Arafat, and exile him out on the high seas in the Karin-A. He'd be the ideal Man Without a Country. See if anyone lets him dock. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 02:11:00 PM Lori, did I mention I finally remembered to blogroll you? Keep up the great work! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Joe Baby EMAIL: joe_baby_phx@yahoo.com IP: 63.14.194.90 URL: http://moronwatch.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 10:54:52 PM I read somewhere that Jordan, Egypt and a third nearby country that I cannot remember have refused giving asylum to the hairy, spotted one (Arafat). I guess that pan-Arab solidarity didn't last too long. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The Blogs Rolls On PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:43:40 PM ----- BODY: Link via Pejman. I'd never heard of Regurga-Blog, but Mr. Sobieski offers an excellent short lesson in Israeli history. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blame Tepper If You Don't Like It PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 12:51:40 PM ----- BODY: Myria is a regular contributor here in the Drinks section, but she's all grown up now and moved into her own digs. Check out "It Can't Rain All the Time." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dave EMAIL: dtepper@davetepper.net IP: 199.173.224.20 URL: http://www.davetepper.net DATE: 04/01/2002 01:03:41 PM Blame MOI?! No. Nuh-uh. I'm happy Myria's bloggin' now. Myria blogging is of the good. As you well know from her comments here. I think you're just scared of the competitiion. ;-) ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 216.244.7.130 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/01/2002 01:53:57 PM A nice blog. I'll put it on my list. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Do They Make One With A Middle Finger? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 02:01:12 PM ----- BODY: The Rant List is fed up, too. When Arafat does die, my plan is to videotape myself dancing in the streets waving a big yellow foam finger with "#1" printed on it, chanting "USA! USA!" and firing shots into the air. I'll send them the video with the hopes that Hamas will view it, and take a moment to ask themselves "Why do they hate us? Maybe we ought to re-examine our policies?" I'll never be able to look at giant foam fingers the same way again -- and for the first time ever, I want to own one. You know, just in case. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Robert Bauer EMAIL: rbauer@vt.edu IP: 198.82.91.129 URL: http://www.hokiepundit.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 02:37:26 PM If that happens, I'll personally mail you a giant foam #1 finger, so long as you don't mind the Virginia Tech logo on it. Perhaps someone with editing skill can combine numerous bloggers doing it, and combine it into one? Think of it: you, me, Samizdata, InstaPundit, Mark Byron, Kevin Holtsberry, Ben Domench (no offense to those not listed), the list goes on, all waving a giant #1 finger! Personally, I'll do what I'm told the radio stations did when Khomeini died: play Ding Dong the Witch is Dead several times ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Melissa EMAIL: melmalko@netscape.net IP: 65.31.228.234 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 02:52:07 PM I plan to dance in the streets and hand out candy to the kids. I'm hoping to get on CNN -- perhaps a phone call from Christiane. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sean Kirby EMAIL: krypto246@yahoo.ca IP: 64.229.209.149 URL: http://punditexmachina.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 04:21:13 PM I'm so there. Lets get some of those cheese hats while we're at it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:37:56 PM Melissa, I can only hope you plan to hang up on her, too. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Melissa EMAIL: melmalko@netscape.net IP: 65.31.228.234 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 07:11:50 PM Natch...with a resounding BYE-BYE to close. Which reminds me of this Tim Blair item: ARAFAT HANGS UP ON CHRISTINE AMANPOUR And in other Middle Eastern telecommunications news: NAZARBAYEV FAXES E.D. DONAHEY BIN LADEN REDIALS ROBERT FISK CROWN PRINCE ABDULLAH BIN ABDEL-AZIZ AL-SAUD E-MAILS GRETA VAN SUSTEREN MUSHARRAF COLD CALLS LARRY KING KHATAMI PAGES EDDIE McGUIRE MUBAREK SPAMS GEORGE F. WILL Isn't that brilliant? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 07:55:15 PM Tim Blair is a goddamn comedic genius. And not so dumb in other ways, too. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: No Relation to Peter PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:05:20 PM ----- BODY: Jack O'Toole is a very smart Political Professional -- and I keep meaning to link to his stuff. Read this last graf from his most recent post: As much as it depresses me to say this, the Palestinians are right about one thing: Israel faces a choice between capitulation and ethnic cleansing, and because it will never choose the latter, it will ultimately be forced to accept the former. I hope and pray that all this is just my (occasionally) dark Irish soul talking, but I fear it's not. The terrorists are winning. I think Jack is wrong. Backed up against the wall, the world's two most civilized nations conspired to firebomb Dresden and joined forces to create the Bomb. On our own, we dropped two of them on Japan. As Victor Hanson points out at least every couple of weeks, Western Civilization is very good at waging war, very brutal when the need arises, and ultimately victorious. Even usually the French. It's been a bad week for the War on Terror; it's been a worse week for the people of Israel. But that doesn't mean we're losing, Jack. Think of Pearl Harbor, Kasserine Pass, Task Force Smith, or the Ardennes in 1940. We and our Brit cousins have a long history of losing the first battle of every damn war we fight. And winning the last one. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Enough EMAIL: dont@email.me IP: 136.182.2.225 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:32:22 PM OK, so first, let's not allow the Arab apologists to define the language in the conflict. "Ethnic cleansing," as popularized by Milosevic, is synonymous with genocide: murder on a large scale. While that is the most extreme option, another possibly viable one is "transfer," that is, uprooting and forcibly kicking out (but not killing) the Arabs in the West Bank. When the likes of CAIR use the term "ethnic cleansing," this is generally what they refer to. It's not unprecedented or immoral. Large population migrations in the wake of wars are as old as wars themselves. One of the largest such events in history occurred after Pakistan was split from India, when something like 12 million people (!) changed countries. This may very well happen again. I, for one, no longer have any problem with it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:37:13 PM Enough makes an excellent point. The Germans were the last people to try to exterminate the Jews, and look at what happened to them. People forgets that Germany's eastern third was lopped off and given to Poland -- and ten million Germans had to skedaddle west. A further two million were kicked out of Czechoslovakia. More fled the Baltics and there were even trans-Danubian Saxons who no longer felt at home in Transylvania. And I don't recall hearing anyone say the Germans got a bad deal. They got rough justice -- and learned their lesson. Hell, Germany is almost as useless as France now. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 65.29.12.122 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/01/2002 07:55:04 PM ethnic cleansing (as opposed to genocide) makes me think of *scrub scrub.* imagine bethlehem clean and shiny again? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 207.172.11.150 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 09:19:03 PM Will someone please explain to me exactly why strategic bombing, either conventionally or with nuclear weapons, is somehow this "proof of barbarism"?? War is cruelty, as Sherman put it (or thereabouts). The point is to get the war over with as quickly as possible, much as one gets rid of a gangrenous limb by the "barbarous" method of amputation. If you need to have the limb amputated, do you really think it's better to go about trimming the dead flesh layer by layer, for hours?? Or to break out the bone saw and have it cut through quickly?? Forgive my bluntness, but let me say with confidence that if we had not nuked Japan, I would not be here, for the simple reason that, every WEEK of World War II, several thousand ethnic Chinese were being killed off by the good, old-fashioned, somehow-less-barbaric methods of the Imperial Japanese Army than the horrible bomb. And if the bomb cut off one week of resistance time, that's several thousand Chinese who could procreate and produce offspring, including myself. The same, btw, goes for Vietnamese (who suffered a famine thanks to Japanese occupation policies), Koreans, Filipinos, Indonesians, etc. As for those who would gasp about the Germans, let me note that, if German war production increased in '43-'44 in the face of the bombing campaign (and there are both methodological and historical contexts that get ignored by that statement, but never mind that), just think of how much MORE that production would have increased if there had been NO bombing campaign. Or, in the context of these comments, how many MORE trains could've run to Auschwitz, Birkenau, and Treblinka. If there must be a war, for G-d's sake, use everything in our power to get it over with quickly. This business about what means are somehow more or less barbarous are far more likely to prove, ultimately, means of tying our own hands than of somehow winning the approval of our enemies. Somehow, methinks not one iota of opprobrium will be lessened based on how we fight the war. How we win the peace, AFTERWARDS, that's a separate issue, but then, that is for a separate message..... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:18:50 AM I agree, "ethnic cleansing" just doesn't fit here. "Transfer" is alright, but it lacks the sense of culpability that the Palestinians should be saddled with. If they are transferred it will be because of their conduct. I think "Eviction" fits the facts better. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Greg EMAIL: gag6t@pop.mindspring.com IP: 63.210.73.142 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:22:35 PM I'm glad someone mentioned Sherman. Bringing a little hell to the Palestinians just might do the trick. I say this as a Southerner who goes to the Georgia capitol every day -- I might abhor the man's tactics, but there's no denying that they work. So, in the spirit of the March to the Sea, here's what the Israelis should do: give the Palestinians the West Bank. Just about all of it -- that's right, decamp from the settlements, pull out from the cities, make haste for Tel Aviv. But not before wrecking the place from end to end. Burn all the cities [except for a few of extraordinary historical significance]. Blow up the power generators. Rip out the water pumps and mash the mains. Plow up the fields and orchards. Cut the telephone lines and knock down the antennas. Then, tear up the roads on the way out. In short, turn the whole place into a barren gigantic refugee camp -- and then throw up a wall, kiss the Palestinians goodbye, blockade Gaza to cut them off from the sea, and leave them to the tender mercies of their Arab neighbors. [They've always been there for them before, after all. =, ] In short, let them have their victory -- continued occupation greatest obstacle to Israeli security anyway. But make their victory so bitter, so painful, that nearly every Palestinian left standing will wish to Allah that they had never fought in the first place. Instead of 1948, let them have 1448 -- a country thrown so hard into medieval times that they'll spend years just cobbling their national life back together, with scarcely the time to contemplate the infrastructure of terrorism. That, in my view, is how to get to peace -- by making clear that all war can get is a Palestinian state at a cost so high that it's not worth having. Just my $.02, though. --Greg Greene ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Ben Sheriff EMAIL: Ben_Sheriff@hotmail.com IP: 62.7.66.164 URL: http://layman.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 01:23:04 PM "We and our Brit cousins have a long history of losing the first battle of every damn war we fight. And winning the last one." Heck, we even managed to do that the last time we fought each other: Britain got the last land battle, the US the last one at sea... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Ben Sheriff EMAIL: Ben_Sheriff@hotmail.com IP: 62.7.66.164 URL: http://layman.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 01:23:13 PM "We and our Brit cousins have a long history of losing the first battle of every damn war we fight. And winning the last one." Heck, we even managed to do that the last time we fought each other: Britain got the last land battle, the US the last one at sea... ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Big Kahuna Burger PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:18:40 PM ----- BODY: I don't know who William Bova is. I don't know how someone got linked to here from there. But I do know that his Sam Jackson soundboard is one of the finest, funnest uses of the web I've ever seen. Click on everything. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Sekimori EMAIL: stacy@sekimori.com IP: 65.32.139.47 URL: http://www.sekimori.com/weblog.html DATE: 04/01/2002 05:18:20 PM I'm very disappointed he left out "You are the sexiest bitch in the room!" Hubby uses that one on me at least once a day... ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: More Money Talk PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:32:45 PM ----- BODY: Dale Felber writes in with more warnings of the US losing liquidity. First he quotes a new StratFor article: "In the United States, the steady flow of Japanese capital will dry up. Some investments will certainly be cashed in, but, since the Japanese are unlikely to be outright owners, this should not create any massive dislocations while providing opportunities for domestic investors. However, the sudden drop in Japanese money will put a severe crimp on development in a country that has become increasingly dependent upon foreign capital to maintain its productivity advances." Then Dale adds: Perhaps, another trillion dollars from our economy? Who will be left to buy our Treasury Bonds which we need to finance the war on terrorism? Unless people are willing to just hide a trillion in cash under the mattress, I think most of that money will come back here. Japan's banks are on the verge of collapse, the EU is listless in a good year, and everywhere else is either too unstable or too small. (No offense to you Aussies and Kiwis. Wonderful nations, even better people -- but not big league.) A temporary crisis is certainly possible. But nothing the Fed and/or Treasury couldn't fix by pumping out extra cash for a short while, until foreign money starts coming back into our banks. NOTE: Must remember to ask Megan McArdle. If everyone started pulling dollars out of the US, that would hugely increase aggregate demand for greenbacks. The yen would tumble again, the euro would sink even further, and Whomever knows what would happen to the smaller currencies. Could anyone afford to keep dollars when they're that expensive? And it would surely make imports as cheap as they've ever been -- a nice boon to a recovering economy. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Megan McArdle EMAIL: janegalt@hotmail.com IP: 12.88.91.205 URL: http://www.janegalt.net DATE: 04/01/2002 04:54:41 PM Negative. . . If people pull greenbacks out of the economy, demand for dollars decreases. That's because Japanese investors won't repatriate dollars; they'll repatriate yen, for which they'll sell dollars, driving down the price. Causing further disaster for their economy as demand for yen pushes up their currency, increasing deflationary pressure in an economy already caught in a liquidity trap. Making imports more expensive for us, devastating economies far and wide as we ratchet back our imports, though it might help those that have a dollar peg as their exports become more competitive. But I don't see it. There's nowhere for the yen to go; their capital markets are hosed. Unless the economy contracts so far that they begin repatriating just to cover current damage. In which case, buy a shotgun and some canned goods and head for the hills. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 04:58:34 PM OK, I had the currency flow backwards on the demand side -- but was right about where it eventually has to go. Here, specifically. Thanks for the help there, Megan. It's been a long, long time since I studied macro. Might have to crack the big blue book again... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jim Muchow EMAIL: theother@soncom.com IP: 207.195.210.43 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:49:58 PM > Might have to crack the big blue book again... Not as long as Megan is around. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dale Felber EMAIL: webmaster@businessbay.com IP: 65.101.135.229 URL: http://www.businessbay.com DATE: 04/01/2002 05:56:29 PM Japan is looking at deflation. When Bush was in Japan he used the word "deflation" when he meant "devaluation". That caused a panic in the press there. I spent three years in Japan and know first hand how there business is conducted. Sorry to be a pessimist, but I'm not so sure that a shot-gun might not be a good investment. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Megan McArdle EMAIL: janegal@hotmail.com IP: 66.108.142.182 URL: http://www.janegalt.net DATE: 04/01/2002 07:48:43 PM Japan isn't just looking at deflation. Japan has kicked the tires, gone for a test drive, and is negotiating the terms on a long term lease. Japan is trying to become living proof that Keynes was right about the Liquidity Trap but wrong about the solution. Japan is so hosed that I don't have adequate words to express it. And eventually that money will go back. I hope it's a long, long time from now. . . but I hope someone out there's getting prepared. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dale Felber EMAIL: webmaster@businessbay.com IP: 65.101.135.229 URL: http://www.businessbay.com DATE: 04/01/2002 07:59:47 PM Ditto! ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Summit or War Council? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:10:52 PM ----- BODY: Brit PM Tony Blair is due to visit President Bush for a summit meeting. Or is it? Word from the Telegraph is that Britain already has battle plans drawn up for war alongside us in Iraq -- as early as September. Strangely enough, that coincides with the time our stocks of JDAMs should be built back up. We used a lot of those in Afghanistan. And I just love it when a plan comes together. (All I need is a cigar.) ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Quana EMAIL: qxjones@yahoo.com IP: 172.171.0.100 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:18:41 AM yer doin' great, Hannibal... Keep smilin' ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: In the Name of Humanity PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:20:24 PM ----- BODY: Playgirl is offering, uh, wads of cash for male Enron employees to pose in their bankruptcy suits. Whatever the offer is, I will double it -- to keep Ken Lay dressed. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Emily EMAIL: misshawkgirl@yahoo.com IP: 64.173.103.76 URL: http://hawkgirl.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 05:37:42 PM What's it to you either way, Steve? I mean, how much time do you spend reading Playgirl anyway? Does VodkaFiancee know about this? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 05:40:26 PM It's for humanity, Em, for humanity. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Emily EMAIL: misshawkgirl@yahoo.com IP: 64.173.103.74 URL: http://hawkgirl.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 05:51:10 PM You never know. It might be good for a chuckle. "Who would have guessed a prick that big could come equipped with no balls?" ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: The British Street Is Angry, Too PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 06:15:44 PM ----- BODY: I'm a little slow finding this one, but you owe it to yourself to read the latest from David Carr at Samizdata. Here's the important bit: In a way that if the most frightening element of this mess; the fact that Arab radicals really seem to think they can push the Israelis into the sea and bring the West to its knees. Not wishing to be pejorative, but they are, quite simply, deranged. That’s what makes this so different from the Cold War. The Russians had chained themselves to a warped and bankrupt philosophy but they could always be relied upon to act in their own best interests. Not so here, sadly. Too many Arabic radicals believe their own rhetoric and are suicidal enough to act upon it. They simply do not seem to appreciate that whatever force the Israelis can unleash it is not but a gnat’s bite compared to that which can be visited upon them by Uncle Sam. David was inspired by a Perry de Havilland piece, that echoed what I said about expelling the Palestinians from the West Bank. Perry concludes with words I wish I had written: "I would just love to be completely wrong about this." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Robert Bauer EMAIL: rbauer@vt.edu IP: 198.82.91.129 URL: http://www.hokiepundit.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 07:58:09 PM What we need is a "Uncle Sam's Best Hits" tape that can be shown throughout the world, featuring such things as Hiroshima, Dresden, Linebacker II, the Gulf War, etc. We could also show some of the things we watched in my history class, like a nuclear cannon and the fall of the Berlin Wall. We could add things like FDR's speech after Pearl Harbor, "Ich Bin Ein Berliner," "Let's Roll," and shots of life in urban, suburban, small-town, and rural America. We could show our colleges, our parks, and our culture. It'd all be denounced as deceitful propaganda, of course. Probably by the EU. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 08:04:29 PM Robert, that's a damn fine idea. Do you know anyone in video production? Someone with a cantankerous bent and a little love of country? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Andrea Harris EMAIL: webmistress@spleenville.com IP: 24.170.155.160 URL: http://www.spleenville.com/ DATE: 04/01/2002 09:06:18 PM Yeah, that would make a great change from the usual Hollywood product: "Look how much America sucks." Of course, this would not come out of Hollywood. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 10:15:45 PM C'mon -- doesn't anyone here know even a local TV news producer? Or some overaged kid with an Amiga VideoToaster? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Joe Baby EMAIL: joe_baby_phx@yahoo.com IP: 63.14.194.90 URL: http://moronwatch.blogspot.com DATE: 04/01/2002 10:50:50 PM And haven't Israel's neighbors tried to bully them in the past, i.e. "we'll gang up on them and blammo!--they'll dive into the sea!" And so went Gaza, and Sinai, and Golan, and the West Bank, etc. I almost wonder if screwy minds were at work recently at the Arab League, thinking that pressure from all sides might yield some results. In the meantime, the IDF occupation of Ramallah means little free time for Arafat's thugs to run free. MSNBC has reported that some of the nasties are being rounded up, which may make the barricading of Arafat more than worth it... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:27:43 AM Hollywood could have its place in the video as well. I think that George C. Scott's "Patton" speechifying in front of the U.S. flag will add just the right touch. Patton was so nuanced . . . ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 206.146.129.38 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/03/2002 09:30:24 AM ew. all of the horses that were shown dying in "patton" were really killed. keeps me permanently opposed to the flick. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: After Dinner Musings PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 07:49:34 PM ----- BODY: Let us pretend for a moment that there exists a single Arab army worthy of Mohammed. You might not know this, but Islam spread from Morocco to Mindanao almost entirely at the point of a sword. Mohammed himself was a fierce warrior, leading his army to victory in battle after impossible battle. So we know Arabs can fight. We also know that their current culture, their lack of industrial or intellectual wealth, and their disdain for actual labor make them almost completely ineffectual at modern warfare. A couple thousand Soviet-model tanks do not an army make. But still, let's pretend. They still wouldn't have deliverable and effective tactical or strategic nukes. Their chemical and biological weapons would still be as dangerous to themselves as to us. They still wouldn't have any local industries to produce replacement bullets, shells, or other ordnance. Their air forces would still be tiny and obsolete. In other words, if every Arab nation suddenly underwent a real, and serious, and profound revolution in military affairs, and did so literally overnight -- we would still have them completely outclassed. So it is with a disturbed chuckle that I read that the Islamic states threaten "all-out war" if we don't acquiesce in their planned destruction of Israel. Remember the Calvin and Hobbes when Calvin threatened his parents that he was going to grow a beard? Well, you had to figure Calvin had a shot at it in ten years. Ten years from now, Araby will still be worthless -- all they produce is sand, oil, and hate. And we can take the damn oil if we have to. The only question is, by then, how much of their own land will we still allow them to govern. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 207.172.11.150 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 09:25:42 PM Stephen, Some nits here. Pakistan certainly has a small arms industry. It can therefore be reliably expected to produce sufficient small arms and ammunition for its own needs, and probably that of many other Arab states. Egypt has an M-1 tank factory (courtesy of the US). I've no idea how well it'd produce vehicles if the US withheld all technical advice and support, but it might well be able to produce some replacements. Iran, I'm sure, has some arms industry of its own as well (including small arms). The saving grace is that there are few indigenous aircraft factories, the Indonesians coming closest, and no space launch systems (although Iraq and Iran are trying). What is worrisome here is the prospect of third parties aiding your hypothetical alliance. This would include North Korea (missiles, weapons of mass destruction [WMD]), China (various missiles, aircraft, WMD, various electronic systems, space systems), various European states (spare parts for current systems, anti-ship missiles, radars and various electronics, etc.), and Russia (ditto). In this regard, any could serve as the equivalent of the US during 1939-1941, or 1914-1917, i.e., arming our enemies while not directly attacking us, revelling in their ability to hurt, and even drain, their arch-enemy at low cost. Something to worry about, I think. Although I agree that none of the potential enemies you list are likely to be able to undergo the Revolution in Military Affairs on their own, at least not yet. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 09:35:22 PM Good points, Dean. But the kind of specialty munitions it takes to knock out a modern tank (in battle) are simply out of the grasp of Arab nations. With the exception of some command detonated mines, IDF troops are damn near untouchable in their Merkava armor -- and that's in urban warfare. Very nasty. And remember, if we own the oil fields, the Arab armies will eventually have to come out and play. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Enough EMAIL: dont@email.me IP: 65.184.200.9 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 10:18:26 PM This is a bit off-topic, but it's been bothering me for a while, and the photo on the page about the Syrian military (http://www.meib.org/articles/0108_s1.htm) brought it to the fore. Why do these guys look like their dictators? I mean, five guys in the picture, and all appear to be taking part in a Bashar Al-Assad look-alike contest. (Also, am I the only one who thinks Assad is trying to be a Yanni lookalike? (http://www.ripchordz.com/covers/yanni.tell.you.jpg) Same thing with the Iraqi top guard. Why is it that whenever you see footage of Saddam with his military chiefs, etc., it's always a sea of bushy mustaches? What's the deal here? http://abcnews.go.com/sections/world/DailyNews/saddam001004.html http://msnbc.com/news/499014.asp Anyway, sorry Stephen, don't mean to waste bits. Just needed to get this out of my head. I'll behave from now on. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/01/2002 10:40:42 PM Enough, you're not wasting a single 0, nor even a 1. I DIG this stuff, and there's no way I could find it all on my own. That's why I blog. Well, that and the super-sized ego that needs constant public stroking. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Hermetic EMAIL: eakawie@techie.com IP: 205.219.50.94 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 08:59:06 AM Well, didn't Himmler grow a mustache just like Hitlers? ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: This Needs Sharing PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 09:19:51 PM ----- BODY: Ken Layne gets some nasty hate mail from Achmed or Ahmad or Larry or someone. Ken replies with his usual elegance: Ahmad, buddy, the sad thing for you is that I'm exactly the kind of liberal American who tended to side with the Palestinian cause, as did many liberal American Jews I know. (Sometimes they even shared their Muslim-Blood Cupcakes with me.) But you people made a very serious mistake: you thought Americans (and Israeli doves) would be charmed by your suicide bombers. Now if someone could just help me find the first post-9/11 reference to "the American street." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Y'all Come Back Now, Y'hear? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/01/2002 10:22:44 PM ----- BODY: Yes, I know there's a new Nick Kristof already posted on Tuesday's NYT. Yes, I know it's another classic peice of. . .whatever it is you call what Nick produces. Yes, I'm working on a teardown as you read this. It will be posted after midnight (Mountain) as will all my early Tuesday pieces. Sweet dreams. UPDATE: I'm going Google-crazy. This post will be chock full o' good links. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Martin EMAIL: patiopundit@yahoo.com IP: 4.47.3.13 URL: http://patiopundit.com/ DATE: 04/01/2002 11:18:54 PM Thank heavens. The last one nearly did me in. I prefer to dstick to Fpggy Bottom has-beens. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Tuesdays With Nicky PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:07:44 AM ----- BODY: No fancy set-up, no clever intro – let’s jump right in the deep end of the latest Nicolas Kristof column. Beyond the daily heartbreak of the Middle East is a larger tragedy in international relations, the boomerang syndrome. Does Aussie Tim Blair know about this? I bet he could work up some cute local angle to this whole wacky terror thing. It is the impatient young Palestinians who in effect turned Ariel Sharon into the prime minister of Israel. And with each additional suicide bombing, they increase the prospect that Mr. Sharon will be succeeded by the only person who could make him look like a pacifist wimp: Benjamin Netanyahu. Kristof finally says something not nice to the killers of women and children – they got his favorite wide-eyed dove kicked out of office. Apparently, all these suicide bombers are just protesting the results of the last Israeli election. It’s kind of like Michael Moore and the Florida recount, only Moore is more likely to implode under his own weight. The Palestinians have even made respectable in Israel the hard-line view (supported by 46 percent in a recent poll) that Palestinians should be kicked out of the West Bank — a sort of ethnic cleansing of the Holy Land. I came to that same conclusion last week, Nick. I don’t like it, but unlike you, I don’t get paid to air my wet dreams in public. Yet the same boomerang effect applies to Mr. Sharon's policies as well. Each time he bulldozes more Arab homes, each time he kills Palestinians and their hopes, he creates more terrorists. Kristof forgets that the Palestinians were offered 93% of everything they wanted, including the Israelis giving up some of their settlements – and rejected it because they think they can get 100% through terror bombings. But I will give Nicky credit for good writing. That last pair of sentences may be the most succinct summary of Blame the Victim that I’ve ever read. It was telling that when Mr. Sharon blocked Yasir Arafat from going to Beirut for the Arab summit meeting last week, Mr. Arafat's role was filled by Farouk Kaddoumi, a hard-liner who took the opportunity to meet with the leader of Hezbollah, Sheik Hassan Nasrallah. Naughty dictator-type woopty-woops met in a shattered city and said mean things about Jews? Say it isn’t so! In theory it would be hard to imagine a worse Palestinian leader than Mr. Arafat. But the Palestinians could manage that. Well, they could manage it, but only if those nasty Jews forced them into it. Still, the symmetry goes only so far. In the end, Palestinian terrorism may be succeeding in some twisted, shortsighted way, while Mr. Sharon's incursions into the occupied territories are probably doomed to failure. Killing women and children? Effective, but tragically shortsighted. Going after the barbarians? Futile. Did Nick give a second thought to that graf? A first thought? One of the lessons of recent history seems to be that brutality rarely works for a government, especially a democratic one like Israel's, while terrorism often works just fine for insurgents. In Algeria, for example, both the French and the Algerians employed terror; the result was a catastrophe for the French and victory for the Algerians. Likewise, in Colombia in recent years, terror has arguably been successful for guerrillas but a failure for the government. The French quit Algeria. The Colombians left a swath of their own territory. So instead I’d argue that Paris and Bogotá weren’t brutal enough. But that requires one of those tricky second thoughts that New York Times columnists are paid to avoid like OJ avoids introspection. Among Palestinians today, the terror attacks are perceived as successful, and Mr. Sharon has turned Mr. Arafat into a Palestinian hero in a way he never could have himself. Kristof fails again to use his rational faculty. Ask yourself: What kind of culture takes a man who has brought them increasing poverty and failure, has used the tactics of a madman to do so, and is now cowering by candlelight in a boarded up room and shitting in a bucket (for all I know) – what kind of culture makes this man a hero? I’m asking you to ask yourself because Kristof never asked himself. All cultures are equal, you know. Except for the really, really nasty ones – they're more equal than others. In contrast, for Mr. Sharon, tanks seem to work no better in the West Bank than they did in Lebanon. Putting aside the debate about the ethics of Israeli policy in the territories, as a practical matter, from Israel's own standpoint, Mr. Sharon's policy so far has been worse than ineffective; it is aggravating the terrorism. If you’ll look at this map, you’ll see that the invasion was a success. International pressure forced Israel to withdraw, not Arab prowess or PLO terror. And in that last phrase, Kristof again blames the victim for getting blown up at dinner. While Mr. Sharon talks about removing the "infrastructure" of terrorism, the real infrastructure is simply the rage and frustration of ordinary Palestinians. Many of the suicide bombs are made of sugar and fertilizer and cost less than $150 to produce. In such circumstances, a Syria or an Iraq is ruthless enough that it can squash unrest by exterminating everything that moves, but a democratic and more squeamish Israel cannot. Well, rage, sure -- and a shitload of Semtex, an education system geared to producing killers, mothers who urge their sons to suicide, the cult of failure, PA sponsorship, weapons from Iran, moral support from left-liberals, and the brutal corruption of the leadership. But, yeah, the rage bit is all Israel’s fault. Then Nick conveniently forgets to ask how much longer Israel will remain squeamish. It’s difficult to get nauseated over what happens to the enemy when you’ve already thrown up after seeing your daughter’s lungs on a wall. The Israeli press is becoming increasingly critical of Mr. Sharon's adventure and has noted that the prime minister seems to have a habit of getting into messes without working out how to extricate himself. He pushed into Lebanon in 1982 in response to provocations and terrorism. The result was that Israel found itself stuck in an unpopular, failed low-level war for 18 years. Once again, where is Mr. Sharon's exit strategy? Exit strategy? EXIT STRATEGY? The only exit strategy possible to Israel is to book six million one-way El Al flights to Miami. Avraham Burg, speaker of the Knesset, was quoted as saying in Haaretz: "Just because the position of the Palestinians is a stupid one, just because they cannot overcome terrorism and they fled the peace process in a violent manner, does that require us to enter this insane cycle?" Yes, yes it does. The other option is the death of too many Israeli civilians, or the death of Israel herself. The answer is no. Let's hope that Mr. Sharon realizes this soon, because the air will be thick for years with returning boomerangs. Yes, I was being facetious when I said “deep end.” ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Mike EMAIL: coldfury@bellsouth.net IP: 66.20.169.170 URL: http://www.webworxh-i.com/coldfury DATE: 04/02/2002 12:30:46 AM I swear, I'm coming to look forward to the Vodkapundit Tuesday Takedown of Kristof every bit as much you look forward to doing 'em. I don't even bother reading him anymore, I just wait for you to handle it. So you can easily see what a valuable service you're providing here - I don't have to risk elevating my blood pressure by actually reading the fool, I just sit back and enjoy your evisceration of him while you do all the suffering. I thank you, my overtaxed ticker thanks you... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:39:30 AM It's all a public service, Mike. Because I love people. Two lies for the price of one! ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Think Big PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:23:14 AM ----- BODY: It seems like David Warren is publishing more often. If so, that’s a win for all of us. In his latest work, he takes a look at Sharon’s strategy for dealing with the barbarian bombers. I looked at the same thing yesterday, and came up with a cruel Robert McNamara analogy. After reading Warren, I think I might have come down slightly too hard on Sharon. Here’s the meat: Most significant is the intelligence haul from Mr. Arafat's compound. The IDF soldiers have been at pains to secure and remove files, documents, and communications records; the mission to Ramallah was in some sense planned like the commando raid on the Karine A in the Red Sea in January. There is presently a large traffic of intelligence "content" between the Israeli government and the CIA, Pentagon, State Department, and White House in Washington. Connexions between the Palestinian Authority and international Islamist terror organizations including Al Qaeda are being established, chapter and verse. It is this intelligence haul that will keep the operation going. It is in effect Prime Minister Sharon's repayment to President George Bush for understanding as Israel proceeds with -- judging from the reported call-up of some 31,000 reserves -- its largest single military operation since the invasion of Lebanon in 1982. On this scale, it must be assumed that the IDF will go through the entire West Bank and Gaza, rounding up suspects, weapons, and documents in the most thorough clean-out of terrorist nests yet attempted. I’m still not sure I buy it, however. Earlier in the column, Warren compares Sharon’s tactics to baling water – so long as you bale faster than the water comes in, the boat won’t sink. But that still doesn’t do anything to fix the leak. And that’s why I think Sharon is doomed to failure. The rules changed for us on 9/11, and they changed for Israel on 3/27. This is not a time to bale water. This is not a time to think small. This is a time for solutions as bold, as daring, and perhaps as horrific as the 9/11 attacks themselves. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: That's Gotta Hurt PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:25:27 AM ----- BODY: In today’s OpinionJournal, Victor D. Hanson takes a look at the plight of the Palestinians – and tells them to shut up and buck up. What they’re going through, he says, is nothing new, nothing unusual, and nothing they didn’t ask for. It’s this morning’s Required Reading. Depressing, but useful intellectual ammunition. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: April Reruns Bring May Sweeps PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:26:38 AM ----- BODY: Robert Pollock replays a piece from last year, detailing 30 years of Arafat’s barbarian ways. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In The Guardian PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:27:46 AM ----- BODY: It doesn’t get any easier than this. The World’s Most Self-Loathing Jew, Suzanne Goldenberg, reports from the West Bank. Here’s the second graf: In Washington, however, President George Bush refused to condemn the Israeli operations, repeating earlier observations that the Jewish state had a right to defend itself, and only calling on the prime minister, Ariel Sharon "to keep the path of peace open". The only people calling on Bush to condemn Israel are those barbarians already committed to its destruction. And where is fighting terrorists considered a bad thing? Say it with me now: Only in The Guardian. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Short and… PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:28:22 AM ----- BODY: Header from today’s WaPo: “Arafat’s Lieutenants Targeted for Arrest.” Sweet. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:33:31 AM Sweeter still would be "Arafat's Lieutenants Targeted for Sanction with Extreme Prejudice". ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:41:54 AM No argument from me on that one, Bill. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Today’s Recurring Theme PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:29:29 AM ----- BODY: Nicky Kristof isn’t the only one making the Palestine/Algeria “connection.” Richard Cohen goes after it, too. But neither one of them understands the stakes this time. Here’s where Cohen demonstrates his Kristof-like naiveté, and/or virulent moral equivalence: The tragedy here -- the tragedy to be added to all the others -- is that the major parties ostensibly agree: There should be a Palestinian state and Israel should be entitled to live in peace. Sadly, one of the major parties has slight quibbles with the details of the agreement. Like, that part where the Israelis get to live in peace. And that other part, where the Israelis get to live. Other than that, they’re this close to reaching a really fair deal. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jason Bates EMAIL: jason@e-daq.net IP: 12.96.18.132 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 02:13:42 AM Now, now, I'm sure there are a couple of settlements that would satisfy the Palestinians without requiring the extermination of the Jews. For instance, the Palestinians get all of Israel, and the Israelis get, say, the moon. And, that might even encourage the Palestians (and the rest of the Arab Street) to build a decent infrastructure - you have to have some kind of functioning industry to transport suicide bombers into space. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Too Good to Pass Up PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:30:18 AM ----- BODY: Quoting Debka two days running? Yes, but I swear I’m not fevered. According to the folks at Debka, some Palestinians tried a suicide-squad rescue of Arafat from his hole in Ramallah. This has been tried before in the Holy Land, as evidenced in that fine documentary film, Life of Brian. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kevin EMAIL: kevin@largeamericanpenis.com IP: 68.15.23.175 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:56:36 AM Were the rescuers the suicide squad, or were they rescuing a suicide squad. I'm confused. Either way, if they're going to commit suicide, doesn't that make it ok to shoot them? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:14:39 PM Kevin, I think that's called "helping things along." Nothin' wrong with that, right? ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Will God Even Sort Them Out? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:31:24 AM ----- BODY: First we hear news that Palestinians are murdering each other over alleged collaboration with the Israelis. Now Reuters (Motto: “One Man’s Wire Service Is Another Man’s Over-Sized Gallstone”) reports of a grenade attack on a mosque in Pakistan. Two killed, 35 injured. There comes a point where instead of calling for clearing the West Bank, I’m going to call for clearing everything east of the Urals and south of Sicily. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Out With the Lot of Them PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:34:57 AM ----- BODY: Mark Steyn explains why I never thought the Brits should abandon the Monarchy. Well, not so long as the Queen Mother was alive. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: All the Cool Kids Are Doing It PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:38:11 AM ----- BODY: I think Sarge started it with his "Red Dye #5." Now more and more bloggers are doing a "blog of the week" type link. Not one to give into fun peer pressure, I'm putting mine above even the Top Shelf links. Israel's own Tal G is our very first Single Malt blog of the week. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Martin EMAIL: patiopundit@yahoo.com IP: 4.47.9.27 URL: http://patiopundit.com/ DATE: 04/02/2002 02:18:11 AM Well deserved. I hope he keeps posting. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: davidmsc EMAIL: david@davidmsc.com IP: 66.69.19.163 URL: http://www.davidmsc.com DATE: 04/02/2002 04:19:39 PM Hey! I love Sarge, too, but I've had a "HotSpot" site for months! Credit where it's due, and all... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 08:03:56 PM Will someone please give David a well-earned pat on the back and two atta boys? ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Even Educated French Do It PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:52:25 AM ----- BODY: Napoleon? Water under the bridge. Impossible vowels? Their business entirely. Snooty waiters? Understandable, considering the quality of the food. Surrender too easily? Better than fighting sometimes, really. Hypocrisy? It's all part of the world we live in. No sense of humor? These are serious times. Bad existential movies? Remember Gosford Park? Anti-American? Well, we do sometimes throw our weight around. REALLY anti-American? We should learn to listen more to our friends. You see, dear readers, I've decided to forgive France, the French, and even that silly language of theirs. Have I lost my senses? Have I had one too many glasses of a nice little Côtes du Rhône? Nope. But get this: there's a new tasty French blog called Chez Mangeclous. I don't much trust Google translations, but the bloghost seems to be pro-Israel. And anti-Friedman. But both of those details pale in comparison to their blogroll. Mangeclous has only four Anglophone blogs linked: Andrew, Glenn, James, and. . .me. It is possible to flatter a link whore. Hear that, Andrew? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Maggie EMAIL: eejmate@aol.com IP: 152.163.195.189 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 02:05:52 AM Yup. He's pro-Israel. (Never thought I'd put my knowledge of French to such a use. Deciphering the idiomatic means and ways of a French blogger. I understood 98% of it.) ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Feel Proud PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:07:31 AM ----- BODY: Martin Devon -- a blogger who deserves more readers -- goes on a longish rant, but it's worth your time. I too often forget, as Martin reminds us, that all of us here in America stand on the shoulders of giants. I don't know who I would have become had I been born under in a different place or time. But at the risk of sounding like "W," I think I've figured out who us and them are. The reason that most people in our society grow up to be decent, hardworking, loving people is because we stand on the shoulders of the giants who said this: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness. That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed." Simple, corny, obvious. But wonderful. Alone among nations, America is an idea, not an ethnicity. The truth is, that in this war that we fight, we are not intrinsically any better than our enemy. But our ideas are better. Our values are better. Our giants are taller. Read that last line again. "Our giants are taller." I wish I'd written that. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Paul EMAIL: pmcd9_2000@yahoo.com IP: 198.50.63.15 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 06:32:41 AM Hi, I just wanted to let you know i'm here and i've been reading your blog for about a week now. It's quite entertaining. You can thank James Lileks for the referral. ~Paul ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Will Collier EMAIL: willcollier@mac.com IP: 192.31.86.34 URL: http://willcollier.com DATE: 04/02/2002 06:38:07 AM Damn, that's a great line (better than anything written in the entire career of, oh say, Alex Beam). Thanks for the link. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Perry de Havilland EMAIL: PdeH@libertarian-samizdata.net IP: 194.112.60.212 URL: http://samizdata.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 07:59:21 AM But the reality is that Australia, New Zealand, Canada and Britain's societies are also based not on ethnicity but on values of natural rights. All the Anglosphere societies are imperfect but it is this Anglosphere basis of social common law (rather than ethnic belonging) that actually defines the 'exceptionalism' many in the USA incorrectly think exclusively theirs. In many ways the USA does indeed embody the finest distillation so far of these ideals... and in other ways its certainly does not (the 'non-ethnic' United States is demonstrably more ethnically segregated than Britain). Yet to understand what makes the United States what it is (warts and all), it is important to understand that the evolved underpinnings did not start in 1776 and nor are those underpinnings still evolving in splendid isolation, either in the past nor even more so in this ever more densely networked world. Feel proud... but stay clear headed. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Hiawatha Bray EMAIL: bray@globe.com IP: 198.115.73.98 URL: http://www.monitortan.com DATE: 04/02/2002 04:39:09 PM You're right. That last line is the kind any good writer reads with envy. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Beam Me Up PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:11:28 AM ----- BODY: Joining in the Alex Beam pile on would be, to coin a word, simples -- so of course I'm all over it. C'mon, kids -- this'll be fun! Writes Alex: Aimez-vous blog? Then you must enjoy Andrew Sullivan, the creator of andrewsullivan.com. In real life, Sullivan is a writer for The New Republic and The New York Times Magazine who pens occasionally cogent essays on being gay, British, and/or Catholic, three bases he has well covered. But as a daily ''Web logger,'' Andrew is movie critic, literary tastemaker - he even has a Middle East peace plan! An opinion-maker who dares opine? To put this in language even a Globe writer can understand -- no freakin' way! Why, next thing you know, George Will will come up with some wacky way to save baseball. Welcome to Blogistan, the Internet-based journalistic medium where no thought goes unpublished, no long-out-of-print book goes unhawked, and no fellow ''blogger,'' no matter how outre, goes unpraised. In a recent blogophilic outing in Fast Company magazine (old media = bad!), former Globe columnist John Ellis asked, ''Is there anything more tedious than the editorial page of The New York Times?'' Well, yes. How about a frequently updated Web log that randomly posts leader-board rankings from ongoing golf tournaments? That would be John's site, www.johnellis.blogspot.com. ''The golf stuff connects directly with about 35 people,'' Ellis says. ''But those 35 people really are into it.'' The public spirit-minded Beam, however, can't stand that sort of public-spiritedness. It might lead to, um, snide remarks. Or something. At his site called the Daily Bleat (www.lileks.com), humor writer James Lileks spews forth about his lovely child, the leaking fridge, and late-night television (Rod Serling is ''overrated''), and even began a recent meditation on events in the Mideast with the words ''I don't know what to say today. I really don't.'' My point precisely. For my five-sevenths of one reader who doesn't read Lileks, he's a writer who buries the lede. Deep. I mean, sometimes that lede is hidden like Hoffa -- except instead of being under some Jersey chemical plant, it's under 500 words of offbeat humor. Had Beam bothered to actually read the column he was "researching," he would have discovered that Lileks, as always, knew exactly what to say that day. And being Old Media, Beam didn't provide you with a link so you could check for yourself. I did. Twice. Bestirred by my uncharitable inquiry, Lileks demonstrates that he does have something to say. ''Oh, no. You're not going to write one of those clueless old-media `blogging phenomenon' stories, are you? My Bleats are just end-of-the-day remarks. That's all. Granted, I'm not writing about deathless issues such as the movie rights for the story of a Providence mayor'' - ouch! - ''but now and then a few notes on the war just slip in for the few dozen readers interested in the subject.'' Lileks also writes for the soon-to-be-extinct newspaper medium and signs off on his message with this comradely quote from Elvis Costello: ''I wish you luck with a capital F.'' Double ouch! Like even the most primitive flatworm, Beam can experience pain. Useful info, that. Andrew Sullivan piles on: ''I know how threatening this new media is to old newspapers. I don't blame you for wanting to swat us down. But we're definitely appealing to a new audience, providing something fresh. '' It's about 1pm Eastern, the day after Beam talked to Andrew. I doubt Beam has seen much other than asses and elbows all day today -- now that's blogosphere pile-on. The Web loggers' main shortcoming is their compunction to ''say'' something several times a day, consequences be damned. This is roughly equivalent to writing a daily newspaper column, which no one has done here since the late novelist George V. Higgins. It's hard: At a lunch graced with an unending series of kirs at Locke-Ober long ago, Higgins likened the daily writing grind to marriage with an 800-pound gorilla. His precise words were a bit salty for the newspaper, but perhaps you see the point. An Old Media columnist's main shortcoming is to say nothing new at all. Not once. Not ever. Yawn. Another cloying attribute of bloggers is their intense admiration for other bloggers. Many of their Web sites link to one another's, which serves to build collective audience. But clicking beyond the above-mentioned writers, or the likes of Virginia Postrel and Mickey Kaus (both too smart to write every day), lands you in the remote wilds of Lower Blogovia very quickly. Over the weekend, for instance, Postrel posted a link to Norwegian revolutionary (!) Bjorn Staerk 's bizarre recommitment to left-wing raving: ''This new blog is dedicated to the coming revolution, and the age of peace and equality it heralds.'' (More Staerk: ''Noam Chomsky is a brave man, and how he escapes imprisonment in that horrible police state he lives in is beyond me.'') It goes without saying that Staerk includes a link to Postrel's site, www.dynamist .com/htmldocs, in blogland's infinite echo chamber of self-regard. Glenn already took care of this one, but that shouldn't stop me. Links make blogs. That's how we find what's new, hip, fun, cool, brutal, stupid, readable, whatever. I'm sure if Beam were covering an election, he'd be shocked, shocked to find little booths with curtains. If you've read this far, you may have enough time on your hands to become a blogger yourself. It's not very expensive - check out www.blogger.com - and then you can become one of the select 500,000 commentators, like the bilingual Chaotica (''Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's a woman's job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with'') or Rachael Carothers, who launched her Daily Cassandra site on March 3 with the fateful words ''I gave into my weakness and started a blog.'' As a writer, Beam has the enviable ability to make me feel eight years old again. "Are we there yet?" Maybe you will even be mocked in a medium that people actually read. Yes, we're there. I just wish I could say it was worth the trip. UPDATE: Since Alex is either too lazy or afraid to provide links to the actual blogs he tries to make fun of, I've gone and added all the links I could find. No luck tracking down "The Daily Cassandra," however. If anyone has her link, please send it to me. Thanks. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: John B. EMAIL: johnburt@fast.net IP: 209.92.53.59 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:25:00 AM He's a bitter, twisted old man railing at a new paradigm he doesn't want to accept. Face it Alex, the days of a few crusty old opinion makers influencing public thought via print on paper are nearly over. Someone stick a fork in him. He's done. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:30:09 AM I think John gets it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Will Collier EMAIL: willcollier@mac.com IP: 192.31.106.35 URL: http://willcollier.com DATE: 04/02/2002 11:42:18 AM Very telling that Beam quoted Lileks' sharp response--but gave no indication in the column of just how nasty and snide his own initial request to Likeks for comment was. A prime example of Mediot duplicity (to say nothing of arrogance). Safe bet he didn't expect Lileks to post the whole snarky thing online, concurrent with the column. After falling for the Staerk April Fool's joke, I bet this guy is wincing every time his email bleeps today. And I further bet that it's bleeping a *lot*. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:57:13 AM We can only hope, Will. I'm not writing to Beam, myself. I think I've done enough right here. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Melissa EMAIL: melmalko@netscape.net IP: 147.134.174.49 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:09:38 PM Does the man ever look at a calendar? He probably bought the AOL buys Instapundit April Fool's joke, too. Pathetic. He is the reason why I don't do newspapers anymore (except when excerpted on excellent sites such as this one and, of course, Lileks whose child is absolutely adorable). ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:09:59 PM Poor Beamish boy, he feels the tectonic plates shifting under his feet. Ironically, I bet his blogger piece reached more readers than all of his other stuff combined. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Hank Bradley EMAIL: hbradley@hcwl.com IP: 65.101.151.46 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:11:58 PM Them evil bloggists have cracked the monopoly power of big media's editorial boards. Thise boards, in 'shaping the dialogue' or 'influencing the public good' or whatever self-congratulatory phrase they choose, herd the readers' little minds in their preferred directions by EXCLUDING news or background. The bloggists abhor the vacuum created by these wise exclusions, and cheerfully fill it with... news and information not obtainable on NPR or the New York Times or any other well-meaning organs. Go blogifiers! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:13:54 PM One quibble, Hank. Since when did the NYT become a well-meaning organ? My well-meaning organ used to do nothing but try to get inside cocktail waitresses. So, a lot like the NYT, only less sinister. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:18:36 PM Now I'm thinking of re-titling this site "VodkaPundit -- and His Well-Meaning Organ." Fifteen years from now, in the midst of my midlife crisis, Melissa catches me in bed with some 23-year-old Starbucks counter girl. "But honey, I meant well," just isn't gonna fly. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Fred EMAIL: fred@rantburg.com IP: 208.253.65.133 URL: http://www.rantburg.com DATE: 04/02/2002 12:22:39 PM The web is dangerous. With a couple clicks you can compare the writing styles of both Lileks and whatsisname. I'd heard of Lileks before I discovered blogging. Before today I'd never heard of whatsisname, and after today probably won't, either. Perhaps he should write for a medium someone reads? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:27:28 PM Fed, I'd never heard of him, either -- and I read the damn Globe. So that shows you how much of my attention he was able to grab. As for Lileks, he's the web's sparkliest gem, and everyone should go put money in his tip jar right now. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jeff B. EMAIL: dajesusofcool@hotmail.com IP: 172.139.170.116 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:46:40 PM I just did. And you know what's even more telling (or surprising, at the least), Stephen? That Beam is so consumed with floundering contempt that he even takes potshots at a former employee of his paper, John Ellis! That's just Not Done in journalism, from what I know. Talk about all-consuming bitterness. Oh to be fly on the wall, or rather a bug in the computer, when our Beamish boy reads his E-mail. You think he'll be writing a mea culpa next week? Nah, me either. Bottoms up, Stephen. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Another Stephen EMAIL: acce@acce.ee IP: 194.126.101.104 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:54:30 PM Game, set and match to Vodkapundit! We're watching a master French chef in action: a quick slice here, a blazing slash there, and voilà! "The dinner - she is served!!" ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:09:05 PM Thanks for the all-too-kind words, kids. But I'd rather keep making "well-meaning member" jokes. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Moebot EMAIL: nobody@home.com IP: 167.10.243.102 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:09:18 PM To steal an old Sam Kinison bit: "Just take your life, Beam, you loser!..." Creak, creak, creak... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kato EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 168.215.87.95 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:15:11 PM Kristof. Beam. Krugman. Friedman. Etc. Were it not for the bloggers who reprint their pieces, or provide links to them, I would never spend two seconds reading their stuff. I never even heard of Beam until today. I realize that the mainstream media is the starting point for the online discussion of issues -- specifically, the issue that so much of what the Times and the Globe print is tendentious nonsense and fatuous posturing -- but so many of these pundits are not worth reading, let alone analyzing. I marvel at the capacity of bloggers to digest so much of this stuff on a daily basis. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:29:36 PM It takes a strong stomach, Kato. Actually, for me it just takes a willingness to have some fun at the expense of an idiot. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 209.179.218.27 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/02/2002 01:48:37 PM Funny. He says writing every day is hard work, that it's hard to "say something" several times a day. I guess he didn't really read many blogs, or he'd see that, because the "establishment" media print so many assinine things, there's a target-rich environment. Great take-down, Stephen. Now I don't have to read anything else about it all day. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:54:57 PM Does this mean I can go back to the well-meaning member jokes? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: John Hawkins EMAIL: bloghawk@hotmail.com IP: 131.107.3.78 URL: http://hawksblog.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 02:09:11 PM I couldn't resist. The guy dissed Lileks, so I couldn't let it go. To: beam@globe.com. Subject: Research on columnist article Beam, weren’t you once a gopher boy fetching coffee for the old fart at the City Desk? Why are you churning out this dreck? I can’t tell if the puff pieces about Susan Maushart and Michael Dukakis are diluting your serious work, because I’m not all that familiar with you (actually, never heard of you before in my life), but I have my suspicions. I’m doing a story for the Blogosphere on old media columnists (deadline: five minutes from now, unless of course I decide it needs more time – ha, ha, it’s like that writing a blog – you can always tell your editor to go to hell about the deadline, or subject, or tone, since, well, you’re your own editor. I’m sure the sheer unbounded freedom sounds scary, but really it’s quite fun), anyway, like I said, I’m writing a column on print media journalist, and was wondering if you could take the time to respond to some questions. Thanks, - Isn’t it awfully frustrating to have something to say about a current issue, but not have another spot in the paper for three more days to say it? Or do you ever feel like you have anything to say? Perhaps it’s all hack-work to pay the bills - I honestly couldn’t tell from your Globe columns, they were all about such insipid topics. - Speaking of which, do you ever feel constrained by the format of your column, of always having to write about local irrelevancies like the life and times of a mayor from the smallest state in the union? - On the other hand, you must find some comfort in the belief (false, these days, but you probably don’t know that yet) that you can misquote or misrepresent someone else and ninety-eight percent of your readers will never know. How often are you tempted to abuse that power? How often do you succumb? Feel free to respond. Take your time, like I said, deadlines are flexible around here, and I can always update my article with new information. On the other hand, if you’re afraid I might purposely butcher your quotes, you can always start your own blog. Here’s a story about blogging – it’s not really very good, but it does give some rather vague instructions on how to start a blog. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have any links, so you might try blogger directly. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Hiawatha Bray EMAIL: bray@globe.com IP: 198.115.73.98 URL: http://www.monitortan.com DATE: 04/02/2002 03:00:20 PM Beam's one of our best columnists. He is, alas, off the beam on this one. But what's up with the silly respondents who think we professional journos are terrified of the bloggers? Most of us don't give two seconds' thought to the phenomenon. Which is a shame, because I'm a blogger and love to read others' blogs. But are blogs likely to undermine traditional journalism? Chortle! Assorted knuckleheads once said the Web itself would take care of that. I sneered then, and I sneer now. Pay attention and you'll notice that most good blogs are commentary on stuff that appears in old-fashioned newspapers and magazines, complete with links to the original stories. You guys are actually promoting our work. Why would any journalist fear that? Hiawatha Bray Tech Reporter Boston Globe ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 03:22:53 PM Exactly right, Hiawatha. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jay Reding EMAIL: comments@jayreding.com IP: 12.75.139.174 URL: http://www.jayreding.com DATE: 04/02/2002 03:37:23 PM I have to agree with Hiawatha Bray on this one... blogs *might* replace the editorial pages to some extent, but that still leaves a lot of room for traditional journalism. And yes, this revolution was predicted back in 1995 when personal home pages were in vogue - but until tools like Blogger and Moveable Type came along, that revolution didn't have the ease-of-use it needed to really take off... perhaps now the independent web will see more of it's promise fulfilled. The reason why some journalists fear bloggers is that they think a lot of us are just too stupid to understand the world without them. (Perhaps this isn't Mr. Beams opinion, but it is one endemic to the press these days.) The fact that a Glenn Reynolds or a Stephen Green can beat them at their own game isn't an easy pill to swallow - blogs are by nature chaotic and unfiltered beasts, but this new technology has the potential to be a lasting media phenomenon, naysayers be damned. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 192.189.236.20 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 03:58:53 PM I think that what is motivating the feverish responses from at least some in the journalist realm is the career threat: What is (or was) the standard career path for a journalist? Start off as a cub reporter, Work your way up at the paper(s), getting ever more prestigious beats. Eventually, what do you become? A pundit. A columnist. Someone who writes on the op-ed page, or has a boxed column in one of the sections. As many bloggers have noted, blogging would not, could not, survive without traditional journalists. But which journalists are necessary? The cubbies. The beat reporters. The guys reporting from the battlefield, from the city street, from the front-lines of technology or welfare reform, or even ring-side/court-side/in the dugouts. And what are bloggers doing? They're writing columns. Or, they'd be writing columns if they worked in the journalistic field. They're working at the head of the class (or would top of the food chain be a better analogy)? So, here you are, a reporter slogging your way through the City Council hearings, the "first baby of the year" stories, the Nth mugging, the Zth drug rehab center opening (or closing). And what do you find? A bunch of folks who haven't been to J-school, who have other jobs, other interests, writing more frequently, often more stylishly and charmingly (yes, Stephen, that applies to you, even when making member jokes!) than your own stuff half the time. What the heck would your reaction be? Notice that among the journalists who cover tech, who have more specialized areas of interest, there's far fewer "slings and arrows". Partly, I'd suspect, it's love of technology---but partly, it's because they're doing what they're doing for the same reason y'all blog---the love of the game, of imparting knowledge, of telling the world about what's going on. Just a thought..... ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 04:02:39 PM As he usually does, Dean finds an angle I'd missed. GodDAMN I love blogging. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kato EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 152.163.197.47 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 01:24:36 AM Bloggers will not replace newspapers and magazines or, specifically, the editorialists at those publications. They demonstrate, however, that the claim that the New York Times is the paper of record is just so much bullshit. Corporate media is beholden to so many influences that a commitment to the truth is always a value up for sale. The politically correct nonsense that routinely appears in these mass-media outlets shows how corporations will routinely capitulate to almost any pressure so as to not cause real controversy or (heaven forbid) put pressure on revenues. The same crap goes on in the universities. It's a lot easier to give an endowed chair to some Afrocentrist who believes that Blacks are descendants of a super-race of space aliens and that the ancient Greeks stole everything they knew from Black Africans than to stand up for the truth. Why lose sleep and a lucrative contract if a bunch of idiots want to believe in lies? Bloggers and their readers are that small part of the population that doesn't want to be fed a steady diet of bullshit. We may not find the truth in these sites, but at least we are not content with trafficking in homogenized lies. And, as Stephen repeatedly points out, it's just plain old fun to rant and argue. Regards. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: ricky EMAIL: surfadelic23@aol.com IP: 198.199.226.254 URL: http://shortattention.blogspot.com/ DATE: 04/03/2002 05:51:52 AM I've been following the various threads regarding the Beam-mans brilliant screed. The only thing I have to offer is why is everyone so surprised? I don't have the tech background that some of the writers have, but doesn't this generally happen every time a "new" technology is unveiled? There were people who thought that recorded music would be the death of live performances. Instead, it got the music out to people who either couldn't afford tickets to the symphony or who lived in places where access to cultural events was limited. Remember the debut of the video tape? That was supposed to cause the utter destruction of the movie industry. With the exception of "Joe Dirt" and "Freddy Got Fingered", I really haven't seen this celluloid apocalypse either. The latest red-headed stepchild was Napster. With the crying and teeth gnashing done by the RIAA, one would think that the head of Arista records was selling oranges by the freeway to pay for his mansion in the 'Bu. When something new is developed, the staid establishment has a tendency to immediately view as either evil and dangerous or as a threat to the status quo. Fuck it, man. I say threaten the status quo. I'd run out of fingers if I tried to count all of the news stories I'd found on blogs that were NOT covered by the conventional news media. I'd like to see a mock up of a paper by bloggers held next to the NYT or WaPo. It would hopefully kick the shit out of the blown dried pieces of fluff currently masquerading as "news". Well, time to hop off the soap box. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: tom matrullo EMAIL: tom@urbanrubbish.com IP: 209.26.246.134 URL: http://tom.weblogs.com DATE: 04/03/2002 07:12:35 AM For an additional perspective, go here, http://tom.weblogs.com/2002/04/02 scoll down a little. cheers, tom ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Never Again PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:18:21 AM ----- BODY: Susanna Cornett sends in a link to a page on Walk for Israel. Like the New York Times post-9/11 project, it features a picture and small bio of each Israeli vicitim of Palestinian terror. 389 pictures. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Emily EMAIL: misshawkgirl@yahoo.com IP: 64.173.103.74 URL: http://hawkgirl.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 11:40:55 AM Devastating. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Melissa EMAIL: melmalko@netscape.net IP: 147.134.174.49 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:02:53 PM Heartbreaking. Little kids -- including little kids with distinctly Arabic names. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jim EMAIL: yakzilla@aol.com IP: 65.82.160.231 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:44:44 PM I think it's time to start the "West Bank and Gaza Strip Daisy Cutter Fund" drive. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: susanna EMAIL: biasblog@hotmail.com IP: 141.153.242.182 URL: http://bias.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 12:51:24 PM The shredding of so many hopes and lives: A couple killed together 6 days before their wedding; a mother at home when her husband and two sons are killed. This helps Palestine how? ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Hiawatha Bray EMAIL: bray@globe.com IP: 198.115.73.98 URL: http://www.monitortan.com DATE: 04/02/2002 03:19:24 PM I sent 'em a few bucks. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Conspiracy Theory PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:40:19 AM ----- BODY: Today, bloggers united to counter-attack media giant Boston Globe columnist Alex Beam. Within hours, Blogspot suffers its first outage in over a week. As daring investigative reporter Les Nesman once asked: "Coincidence? I wonder." ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Montgomery Burns EMAIL: wolfgang@sabreshockey.com IP: 12.19.209.89 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 12:15:10 PM Excellent. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Mac Thomason EMAIL: macathom@yahoo.com IP: 216.109.18.180 URL: http://warliberal.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 01:42:21 PM Seriously, I think it had something to do with the ad server going wonky. (I was getting into sites and then getting kicked to the file not found screen). Then the whole thing went offline and when it came back the ads were ok. Which only goes to show you the importance of buying off ads. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:54:19 PM I dunno, Mac. I can't even get the Instantman to load up. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Mac Thomason EMAIL: macathom@yahoo.com IP: 216.109.18.180 URL: http://warliberal.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 02:41:49 PM Weird. I had some problems earlier, but I haven't had too many except for the ads; more glitchy than anything. Yellow Alert, not Red. Of course, this connection is always wonky as hell, so I can't tell a lot of the time if it's Blogspot or the connection. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 02:45:01 PM Now that Sprint has my "issues" fixed, my connection is rock solid and fast -- but you never know what router might have died between me and blogspot. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Scutum EMAIL: scutum@horologium.net IP: 172.191.62.219 URL: http://www.regurgablog.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 07:51:18 PM Blogspot was the source of the problem. Last night it started acting up, and it was still flaky when I tried again this morning (10AM Pacific time). It appears to be working now, as I was able to fix last night's misadventure. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: You Only Enocurage the Ones You Love to Hurt Themselves PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:04:21 PM ----- BODY: Reader Rick Vogel writes in with some excellent questions. Remember the "your drug money is paying for terrorism" commercial. Well, whose giving the subsidies to Arafat that are paying for the terrorism? How much of the money the US gives the PLO ends up as "compensation"? How many terrorists would there be with no financial inventive? It's a classic Hollywood stereotype the suicide-with-the-bomb-on-the-plane-for-the-insurance-money, how does it play in the west bank? Indeed. Per capita income in the West Bank is usually measured in goats because cash is so scarce. Seriously, the CIA Factbook estimates it at about $1,500 -- and shrinking. Saddam's bounty comes out to a one-time cash payment worth almost 17 years of income to a suicide bomber's "grieving" mother. In terms of American wealth, that's damn near 2.5 million dollars. That's a lot of compensation for one no-good, layabout, fanatical son. P.S. I love being able to say "ignore" to Kristof when doing a spell check! Good point, Rick. I've just deleted "Kristof" from my personal SpellCheck dictionary. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kato EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 152.163.197.47 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:59:46 AM Check out Robert L. Pollock's 4/2/02 piece (a reprinting of an earlier piece actually) at OpinionJournal.com. The money cited by Vogel would appear to be chump change compared to the billions of dollars that Arafat has under his (seemingly exclusive) control. The piece gives a good synopsis of a 30-year career that has left tens of thousands dead and that has ruined the lives of hundreds of thousands. I eat lunch a few times each week at a Middle Eastern restaurant run by Lebanese Christians who left their country during the civil wars of the 1970s. These people can tell you what Yasser Arafat has done. I'd love to see this bastard get sent off to the next world in a manner worthy of Mussolini. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just Do As He Says PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 01:51:28 PM ----- BODY: Blogspot is about as well-behaved today as an eight-year-old chewing espresso beans let loose in the Nintendo factory. So let's link a few non-Blogspot bloggers for your afternoon reading enjoyment. Cold Fury's Mike Hendrix does an excellent analysis (vivisection, really), of who is a terrorist. Hint: It ain't the Jews. Mike is proof that you'll get a much better scoop from a rockabilly-playing truck driver than you will from paid professional pundits. Kids, do try this at home. SIDE NOTE: Mike, ever hear Setzer's cover of Sleepwalk? Goddamn! The esteemed Steven den Beste looks at the wisdom behind exiling Arafat. Read that, then just keep scrolling. Den Beste has never been better. Stacy Tabb, my Web Administratrix, talks to children today. I'm not selling that very well, but trust me when I tell you to read it. Her site is charmingly naughty and just plain charming, and I really do mean to link to her more often. And then there's Ken Layne, Lileks' next city beat reporter. Light, deft -- and sharp as a diamond-honed tack. Read it all. Yeah, I know that was a really lousy metaphor, but I'm just feeling all lazy after the pasta one I posted over at Asp's site. In fact, head on over to Asparagirl, read her latest, then pat her on the head and make soothing noises, OK? That should keep you busy until Blogspot is up and running again. UPDATE: Naturally, as soon as I get this posted, Blogspot starts functioning again. I don't care -- click those links, anyway. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Mike EMAIL: coldfury@bellsouth.net IP: 66.157.116.114 URL: http://www.webworxh-i.com/coldfury DATE: 04/02/2002 05:23:10 PM Yep. As a matter of fact I've known Brian and his brothers for years. My little brother used to date one of Brian's exes.One of my side bands while I was living in NYC played Kenny's (Brian's younger brother) wedding in Miami a few years ago, and Brian played it there, which was the first time I'd ever heard him do it. Nice guy, damn fine guitar player. And he does pretty well kick that song's ass, I'd have to say! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 05:25:48 PM Remind me to try hitting you up for tix next time he's on tour. I'm not sure I'm kidding. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Asparagirl EMAIL: asparagirl@dca.net IP: 66.108.52.244 URL: http://www.asparagirl.com/blog/ DATE: 04/02/2002 08:32:30 PM I will not be mollified, damn you! I intend to be freaked out for a good long time yet, got it? GOT IT? Harumph! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 08:34:59 PM There, there, Brooke. I shall continue to make cooing noises until... I dunno, until you get to Cali and the good Captain of Love takes care of you. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: "Now Up Yours" PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 02:15:32 PM ----- BODY: Link via The Flying Monkey. David Hackworth has a new column up at (the occasionally wacky) WND. The retired, heavily decorated colonel says our troops aren't fit enough. I hope he's wrong, because the old saw is true: The more you sweat in peace, the less you bleed in war. Is it time to follow Pat Paulson's lead up up our standards? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: John Stryker EMAIL: sarge@sgtstryker.com IP: 165.247.109.149 URL: http://www.sgtstryker.com DATE: 04/02/2002 03:14:16 PM Hackworth's a dipshit ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 03:21:09 PM John, sometimes I think he's as full of shit as he is of himself -- and other times he just nails it. So I never know what to think at first. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Kato EMAIL: jnaso65567@aol.com IP: 152.163.197.47 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:42:04 AM Hackworth is a self-serving blowhard that only the I-man could love. I've read stuff about this guy claiming that many of his much-vaunted (self-vaunted?)military exploits are fraudulent. I wish I had something at hand to send you to back this up. But I believe these claims are probably true. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Bill EMAIL: teaguew@crowedunlevy.com IP: 12.147.224.62 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 08:41:22 AM I hope Stryker is right and Hackworth is wrong, but my impression is that Army basic training appears to be less challenging than it was when I served. Both physically and emotionally. I served in the Army Infantry during the 1980s and I stay in touch with many of my friends who still serve, some of them as training cadre in basic training courses. This may be just a case of "my training was tougher than your training" but I don't think so. I'd love to have my vague feeling of unease refuted by cold, hard facts. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: What Hath Lileks Wrought? PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 02:22:22 PM ----- BODY: Jim Treacher, who I apparently filed under "What? I Didn't Link Him Already? Shit!" joins in the Beam Beaning -- beautifully. You want to tell Lileks to write less? What are you, an idiot? Jim, the question answers itself. And you, gentle reader, owe it to yourself to visit Jim and bookmark his blog. And we can only hope John Hawkins really sent this polite request for an interview to Mr. Beam. Hysterical! ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Keith Hopkins EMAIL: susskins@visi.com IP: 12.24.244.131 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 07:28:55 AM Jim Treacher gets fifty points for that. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Humor Me a Minute PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 03:20:24 PM ----- BODY: I had a good, long talk with my Grandfather Green yesterday. Keep reading; it gets interesting. I promise. I think. Grandpa was born on the eve of the Great War, and was old enough, educated enough, and experienced enough to be offered a Navy command in World War II. The War Labor Board wouldn't let him take it -- running a steel mill was considered more important to the war effort than being just another destroyer skipper. And imagine that -- a war so big there was a government agency telling you what jobs you couldn't take. It turns out some of the work he did at Combustion Engineering was vital to the Manhattan Project, so I suppose the WLB was right to make him stay put. Talking to him, all that came back to me. Here's a man with 80-plus years of perspective, someone who has built tools of war for his country, a Reformed Jew who is also a fully-assimilated American. I figured he had to have some incisive things to say about the Current Mess, some angle I'd missed due to my youth and inexperience. He's been to Israel, he's traveled the world, he's seen many more wonders and horrors than you or I. Surely, he'd give me some pearls to pass along to you. I dialed his number with quite some eagerness. We talked about the wedding, the Jamaica honeymoon plans, how lovely and wonderful and perfectly suitable Melissa is, and when we're planning on giving him a great-grandchild. We talked of some sadder family news, and we just talked to each other. We did not speak of wars past or present. In short, we talked about the important things. And it reminded me that we don't talk nearly often enough. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 206.146.129.38 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/03/2002 10:00:34 AM your grampa is richard feynman?! ok, that was obscure, but the similarities are there. kudos on chatting him up while you can. i miss mine. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Just One Last Beam Beaning PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 03:32:52 PM ----- BODY: Hawk Girl Em Jones does such a fine job of answering Mr. Beam, that I could actually see her stomp her foot on the last word of her second graf: As for our accuracy, I challenge any anti-bloggers out there to come up with the name of one blogger that has seen the slightest bit of success or traffic after repeatedly posting misinformation. Not legions, folks. Just one. Check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Blogrolling PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 03:47:17 PM ----- BODY: I'd never heard of him until he left a fine note in the Beam comments, but Jay Reding is blogger worth reading. If Jay is a "Conservative with an attitude," then I don't even wanna know what that makes me. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: One Last Rant PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 05:01:23 PM ----- BODY: Links via Ken Layne. I'd never heard of Ed Champion before, or his EdRants blog -- but, hello, can this man write. On MetaTalk today, he added this about the Final Solution to the Beam Question: The web writer jumps from stone to stone in this giddy lake, with his/her own feverish promptitude being the singular millstone. It is a giddy lake. And the water is fine -- jump on in. Well, don't tell Dvorak to jump in. He stuck in a toe, then decided the pond isn't posh enough for a bigtime PC Mag gadfly. Read his little condescending column if you want yet another example of yet another old media writer Who Just Doesn't Get It. Why is it that the proper posture for a print pundit picking apart blogs is head held haughty, gazing down the nose? Even serious blogs like Sullivan, Lileks, or Reynolds are treated with disdain, at best. Are we really so unworthy? Hardly. The Blogosphere is new, very new. And fractured. Very, very fractured. There has yet to be a great falling out of the bored, the useless, the unentertaining. And yet readership grows by leaps and bounds. PC Mag is a must for me. I'll always read the New York Times. But Dvorak, Bean, and Friedman's (sounds like a bad law firm) days are numbered. And they know it. NOTE: Anytime I use as much alliteration as I did in that all-too-pompous sentence about posture, please slap me upside the head with a relief map of Kandahar. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jim Treacher EMAIL: jimtreacher@aol.com IP: 68.58.56.102 URL: http://jimtreacher.blogspot.com/2002_03_31_jimtreacher_archive.html DATE: 04/02/2002 07:11:21 PM Click my name there for Dvorak's secret identity. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 07:51:53 PM Now I have to wipe Coke and spit of my monitor. Thanks, Jim. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Ken Goldstein EMAIL: kengoldstein@hotmail.com IP: 65.149.129.7 URL: http://bleak.blogspot.com DATE: 04/02/2002 11:22:20 PM From Dvorak's "Rules for the Perfect Blog": "5. Jargon. Pepper your text with words like screed, grok, gonzo, meme, and other bloggerisms to show that you are a hip and with-it blogger. Women bloggers should use the word sister a lot." Hmmm...Grok? Gonzo? Sister? Perhaps Dvorak didn't really deconstruct over 100 blogs but instead simply had another peyote flashback to his crazy 60's and 70's days. Freebird! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 24.221.194.240 URL: DATE: 04/02/2002 11:38:25 PM I grok what Ken is saying here, man. Dig it. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: John Stryker EMAIL: sarge@sgtstryker.com IP: 165.247.81.164 URL: http://www.sgtstryker.com DATE: 04/03/2002 04:52:53 AM I guess we know the name of Dvorak's new blog: "Play some Skynard, Man!" ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jim Muchow EMAIL: theother@soncom.com IP: 207.195.210.43 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 06:03:50 AM I dunno, I found Dvorak's column much more "offensive" than Beam's. Beam's was written by someone who is obviously clueless, but Dvorak is supposed to know better. In fact, I wonder if the entire column wasn't a cut-and-paste job on a moldy old thing written years ago on "this newfangled Usenet" in Modern Minicomputers. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Happy Moving, Sarge. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/02/2002 06:42:39 PM ----- BODY: It's been so long since I did a proper link to Sarge, that I actually forgot to scroll down far enough to see his best stuff today. Which doesn't mean you should miss out. Sarge really did his homework on Arafat. Good links, smart analysis -- everything you've come to expect from Styker. Click here and check it out. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Will on Wednesday PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:04:04 AM ----- BODY: George Will covers so many of the same themes I like to hammer, that I’m not going to bother quoting. Just know that he’s published a day early and you need to read him immediately. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Debi Cone EMAIL: tmi13@hotmail.com IP: 66.3.47.194 URL: DATE: 04/04/2002 10:33:53 AM George Will has long been one of my favorites. Particularly because when he really wants to hammer a point home it's like being stabbed with a stiletto. The mark is hard to find, but damn it hurts. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Sowell Man PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:06:36 AM ----- BODY: Ever considered licensing public activists? Thomas Sowell might just be, in this bitingly funny piece from JWR. Indeed, there are no requirements for any knowledge whatsoever to become an environmentalist or a consumer advocate. There are more qualifications required to become a taxi driver or a meter maid than to engage in any of a number of busybody occupations that are taken seriously in the media, as if they represented expertise on something. Anyway, Sowell is the first person I’ve read who’s bothered to take a sensible look at the “outrage” over Energy Secretary Abraham’s meeting with energy executives. Did you even know Abraham refused to let Ken Lay in the door? That’s hardly making the lede of the major news stories. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Only In The Guardian PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:07:31 AM ----- BODY: I’m laying off Suzanne Goldenberg today. Her report from Bethlehem is the cheapest body count type of moral equivalency that I’ve ever seen passed off as straight reporting. Ever. So what else do we have? This Peter Beaumont story, takes a cold, critical look (humor alert) at the peace activists playing moral bigshots in Bethlehem: "We've lost our value as a deterrent against the Israelis maltreating Palestinians. Their soldiers were prepared to fire on our demonstration on Monday and frankly personal safety is now the priority." Ha-ha. No, really – feel free to go stand in front of the nice men in the uniforms again. You can keep protecting suicide bombers until either the Israelis run out of bullets or you run out of chests. Again, this is reported straight up, without so much as a sideways glance. Where? Only in The Guardian. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Dean EMAIL: dean.cheng@starpower.net IP: 207.172.11.150 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 01:29:48 AM Stephen, Unfortunately, it's NOT only in the Guardian. If you check out Tikkun (tikkun.org), you can find much of this stuff regurgitated, coupled with original material. What's worse, whereas the Guardian is British, Tikkun is American, under the helm of Rabbi Lerner. Lerner, who's now had a piece with Cornel West (noted Middle East expert and rap star) on the need for peace in the ME, strikes me as the worst sort of moral equalizer. For a Rabbi, he is not much of a teacher, IMHO. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Enough EMAIL: dont@email.me IP: 65.184.200.9 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 06:20:45 AM "I wanted to challenge myself to see if I could cope working in a place like this [the West Bank]." Guess what, sweetie: you failed. "A staff car from the British consulate is trying to get here to organise the evacuation from the Star but it's been stuck at a roadblock for the past two hours. No one's looking forward to tonight because it looks like it's going to be very, very hairy." Yeah. Sorta like it is for ordinary Israelis, going out for a burger. Except, of course, the Israelis weren't looking for a "challenge." Their whole lives are a "challenge" right about now. "There's no stopping them. She was in Gaza in January and got hospitalised for two days after a run-in with an Israeli army captain who shoved her out of the way." Oh, the horror. Our effete little terrorist abettor enters a war zone, obstructs military personnel, and one cheeky bastard SHOVES HER out of the way. How rude! ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: redsugar EMAIL: tanichka13@hotmail.com IP: 206.146.129.38 URL: http://www.redsugar.com/journal.html DATE: 04/03/2002 10:09:43 AM ok, bethlehem is a sore spot for me, and i know i harp on it too much, so i'll try to keep it to twenty words or less: if palestinians deserved to have bethlehem, it'd be clean and pretty and beautiful like jerusalem, not scummy and dirty and mistreated like they've made it. crap. twenty-five. close enough. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Reap, Sow, Etc. PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:08:31 AM ----- BODY: Michael Kelly reminds us of the bastard birth of the Palestinian Authority: On July 1, 1994, Yasser Arafat entered Gaza to establish the Palestinian Autonomous Region -- betwixt-and-between creature of the Oslo peace process that was supposed to become, under the guiding light of the Oslo peace process, the physical base of another ambivalent notion, the Palestinian National Authority. I went as a reporter to Gaza a few hours before Arafat arrived, and I stayed there for about five weeks, observing the early days of life and governance under the Palestinian Authority. Arafat's entry into Gaza was an object lesson: a purposely uncaring display of brute power. He arrived from the Sinai in a long caravan of Chevrolet Blazers and Mercedes-Benzes and BMWs, 70 or 80 cars packed to the rooflines with men with guns. The caravan roared up the thronged roads and down the mobbed streets, with the overfed, leather-jacketed, sunglassed thugs of Arafat's bodyguard detail all the time screaming and shooting off their Kalashnikovs to make their beloved people scurry out of their beloved leader's way. And this is the man we’re supposed to tell Israel to give half of Jerusalem? Can you imagine that victory parade? How about an exile with much the same fanfare, followed by a landing in Morocco that no one bothers to cover? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Craig Schamp EMAIL: blogger@craigschamp.org IP: 209.179.210.148 URL: http://www.craigschamp.org/ DATE: 04/03/2002 07:30:17 AM I like George Will's suggestion: Send him to France. It's got a good start on the anti-Semitism he thrives on. It's be fun to see the EUroweenies choke. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Geoff M EMAIL: geoff@nospam.mit.edu IP: 24.60.149.7 URL: http://grasshoppa.blogspot.com DATE: 04/03/2002 07:46:11 AM Yes, France is good, after all Mrs. Arafat is safely ensconced in a cushy Parisian flat. He can join her. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Joe Baby EMAIL: joe_baby_phx@yahoo.com IP: 204.228.23.140 URL: http://moronwatch.blogspot.com DATE: 04/03/2002 08:32:03 AM Yeah, another vote for the south of France. That's where all tinpot dictators go to die. They'll welcome his hairy mug at the card table. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 172.192.238.31 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 10:14:23 AM Also, the French aren't big on hygiene, either. Islam is such a clean religion, but Arafat always seems in need of a 40 minute shower and a tub of Nair. ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Peter Malcolm “Steve” du Forbes IV PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:10:39 AM ----- BODY: When a column is subheaded “Will Californians vote to join the human race?” then you know it’s a must-read. Seriously, Pete du Pont takes a glowing gander at the Golden State’s Racial Privacy Initiative. I like Pete, but he’s not the most original writer. Still, he always does a commendable job of putting a lot of good facts together in a small space. Nice intellectual ammunition, but this is an issue where almost everyone already knows where they stand. ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- -------- AUTHOR: Stephen Green TITLE: Friedman Next Left PRIMARY CATEGORY: DATE: 04/03/2002 12:11:38 AM ----- BODY: Sunday, Tom Friedman started jauntily down the road back to reality. It was an impressive column, really, where he gave up on his silly crusade to push the “Saudi” “peace” “initiative.” We were all so proud of him, really. But now this: In the wake of repeated suicide bombings, it is no surprise that the Israeli Army has gone on the offensive in the West Bank. Any other nation would have done the same. But Ariel Sharon's operation will succeed only if it is designed to make the Israeli-occupied territories safe for Israel to leave as soon as possible. Israel's goal must be a withdrawal from these areas captured in the 1967 war; otherwise it will never know a day's peace, and it will undermine every legitimate U.S. effort to fight terrorism around the globe. From 1948 to 1956, then again from 1957 to 1967, Israel stayed entirely within its own borders, and knew not one day of peace. No occupation, no peace. What makes Friedman think anything has changed in the last 35 years? Palestinians have worse leadership now, not better. Syria and Iraq are still dictatorships of the most brutal sort. Egypt continues its long, slow slide into. . .into the abyss, I suppose. Saudi Arabia is advancing backwards nicely under the leadership of the Crown Prince. Tiny little Jordan is almost an exception, but still so fragile as to not count at all. Is Israeli occupation of Arab lands – forced on them by Arab wars – to blame for Arab political backwardness? Is Tom Friedman now buying into the Arab cult of victimhood? And if not, how can he believe that the backwards Arab nations of today will respect Israel back to its 1967 borders any more than they did in 1967? Here’s the answer: A powerful Saudi Prince jumped on Friedman’s bad idea and claimed it as his own. And like too many columnists, Friedman is too vain to know when his ego is being stroked. NOTE: Am I the only one to notice that whenever a Friedman column is headed “The Hard Truth,” it’s really a red flag meaning “Hard to Swallow”? ----- EXTENDED BODY: ----- EXCERPT: ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Charles Austin EMAIL: charlesaustin@earthlink.net IP: 147.81.161.128 URL: http://sinequanon.blogspot.com DATE: 04/03/2002 06:45:35 AM Listening to NPR on the way into work this morning, they continue to harp on President Bush for not doing more, for not taking advantage of Prince Abdullah's peace plan. Sometimes I wish I had such a simple belief in the power of utopian thinking. It would make everything so much easier. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Melissa EMAIL: melmalko@netscape.net IP: 65.31.228.234 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 08:09:48 AM Buying into utopia would also require believing that Birkenstocks are attractive footwear, and they just aren't. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Jim Meidell EMAIL: JimMeidell@AOL.com IP: 156.77.100.117 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 09:55:28 AM Argh! Like a long dormant anthrax spore, the Q-word, lost somewhere in Afghanistan, has been found! Check out the header on Time.com. ----- COMMENT: AUTHOR: Stephen Green EMAIL: stephenagreen@earthlink.net IP: 172.192.238.31 URL: DATE: 04/03/2002 10:11:37 AM They dredged Q back up? Nooooooooooo! ----- --------